SilvryArdor

They say things happened for a reason, I say bullshit. My love was not toyed for a reason, It was done out of convenience, It was done because human are given free will and because they can. It was done out of a reflection of the other person and who they are, My lover had taken my trust, abandoned me, ruined me in hanging only to come back because they realize how I was right. In loosing one, I seek for others to place my trust in Words are sweet

It hurts. I wanted to claw my own skin and marred it with pain. That way the outside will reflect the inside. Because I asked myself, "Is this something someone who love himself would do?" and I weep I weep I weep. Because deep down I know, The answer is, "No."

Loneliness...do you felt that? I am alone and afraid, My lover is no longer mine, Hence I have none to relied on, There is nothing to tethered me, I had thoughts to put me through these days, Loneliness is a wide consuming abyss, I am used to be alone, Yet it scares me still. It hits you the hardest at 12am. My therapist advised me, 'Never text nor stay awake past 12am. We are vunerable with our own thoughts.' I tried my best to not to

and more to come

I realized, with shame, that I am soft and only wish to be loved and cherish. And one day I will not be ashamed of this. Please, be gentle with me. I have been through a lot, and I am tired.

How does it feels? My love is like the beating of a thousand burning wings. Have you ever seen love crafted with fire and life breath into it? Yet the memories of your face torment me. Your words echo in my mind and the happy memories haunt me. I could still feel your stubble underneath my fingers and the warmth of your skin. Why was it that I can't remember any of these good moments? Not when I was alone and still with you? Why the thoughts torment me still?

There is beauty in first love, Maybe with the fact that it will end. Tell me, Have you ever experienced, or see something so raw and primal? The entire body shuddered Heaving, Chocked with tears and grieve. Throat pained with a thousand burning stars A thousand unsaid things and unspoken emotions Grieve clogged your throat. So everyday I remind myself. There is beauty in my broken love, untaught, untamed and its hunger. It was untaught, As my f

Its 12 30am again. Of course I am crying, I wish the pain would just stop. What do I have to do that this will stop? I think its cruel...its cruel that he left me with advise to stand tall, to love myself and wanting to see me succeed in life. 'Go take a shower. We will scrub our hair clean and they will feel nice again.' A soft voice whispers. How do I even love again? I don't know how. I was never taught. What do I do everything for now? What do I fight for? There is no one to

Ironic is it not? Not once had I done things for myself even in the name of Love. The modern west speaks of a higher self, But the idea is as ancient as the Earth itself, In the middle east they speak of Qarin, It is a djinn they said, It is unknown, their name destroyed by god himself, For a sin unsaid, It is a species hell bend on ruining us, But most of all it is a human`s counterpart, They will lure you to do terrible deed like a siren to a sailor or so they said. Then why does

Its alright haha. For now life is sad and morose but there is always hope for a happier future. There is no prevention for grief but the same goes for joy. Ohh yes. This definitely calls for another soul chilling poems

I have no faith that this story will turn out the same as the original piece that I have read years ago 🤣 but most of all I love the intricacy in their plan to lie to the parents. I agree with Peter that since you push me to a corner, allow me to give you what you want...by law I am following everything you wish for. But Peter? You are an ass. This is love we are talking about. What excuse is that? Take responsibility. No wonder Tristan, hearing that, took his train home. You should made your plan known to your beloved but instead he had to hear it casually while shopping for you. Now he heard your foolishness like this. Own up to it! I can feel the Christmas spirits. Your writing is lovely as always. A pity I am not celebrating Christmas this year due to too many sad events. I wish Tristan would not run away. Come back! But it's satisfying to do. My first relationship ended a few days ago, your story is like a healing balm despite that, yes ehem. They broke up. I hope you don't mind, I shall be lurking about of course. Reading your Christmas stories.

I feel guilty for reading this immediately instead of updating anything *coughed* I like the beginning. I like the emotional pain inflicted first and I love scenes where people cope with their feelings either alone or together. Detached or emotional. As I said...Suffering is a tongue melting dessert and nothing is sweeter than that. Even pure joy is bore and compares nothing to its ability in making happy ending more lovely. Christmas countdown!

The inability to think, How fractured my mind is. How heavy it feels, My mind is on the verge of breaking, The mind is like a nebula that give birth to the stars, The stars that I loved so much. Oh how I weep for them. All my entire life, I have been chasing love, My family, The stars... But I never receive it back Am I an unloveable monster? No wonder Aphrodite laughed when asked, "If love is meant to heal why does it destroy those who chose it?" The love I yearned and lear

Dear diary and myself, I have read so many love quotes and others for writing purposes. Growing up in a broken family with a fucked up life childhood deprived me of certain things and one of them is a sense of normalcy. I lacked measurements on normal things and it used to worry me. What if my love is self destructive? What if I am incapable to love and being loved? With my family genes in me filled with murderers, tragedy and insanity. What if I can't love? What if I am not norm

thank you! You made my day with this, I will cherish it and I am glad both of you enjoy it ~ Also, I am back. Alive and kicking which is unfortunate for most.

Welcome esteemed guests... Such lovely stars They are a purpose that we can barely understand I don't. I watched it as a child when everything around me crumbles. Such solace it gave me. I watch the skies again in the city, Far far away from my problems, But they were not there, No matter how beautiful the morning came Wooing me like a lover. No matter how breathtaking the sunset is, The stars were not there. All that there is are demons, djinn

Welcome! To a place where it walks like a poetry and other writings, quack like one but does not sit like poetry. There is no aim for this writing. The heavens are vast and full of unknown. Contain things that are not poetry.

I would like to say that "Lets add more bodyguard and you will be fine" plan has never work and never will. LISTEN TO NOEL Too late... Its okay, onto next chapter! God damnit

At first, it had been awkward to wake with my head on his shoulder or he spooning me, his arm wrapped firmly around my waist. From the day the attack had happened, he didn’t bother with etiquette any longer. He pulled me into his arms as soon as we went to bed and it felt right. Aww “That’s right, but that is not the only matter; I also have to examine him for penetration… he was a virgin, right?” “Was?” I thought that would be it and Diarmad would kill the doctor on the spot when one of the council members piped up- I thought so too and here I am all excited, bundled up, eyes wide and whispering, "Yessss go D." We all need a friend like Landyn

“Thought of everything, huh?” “No. We arranged it yesterday. I own this building and knew there were several unoccupied flats left. Has your family visited you before?” D, no. You should not be answering that..oh..oh nevermind. I just had a sudden thought that well, Noel is a great person for someone his age. He was hurt and angry about the moving but understands how severe the situation is when explained. But age and experience does play a role here and I am impressed with how smooth the character developments are. At least for me it is, it feels natural. Noel is easily persuaded here, it was endearing to watch and amusing which believe me *mumble* can happen when you have lovers with huge age gap... Yes, I finished Book 1 and now going through again. Second read is when you notice all the details. I figured out why I like your writing, there is conflict but not foolish drama. There is something lovely in seeing people willing to work things together. Of course, I had a cheeky grin at the piano scene.

That is indeed accurate!

Simon startled me out of my thoughts. “You said you’re not sure what’s them, and what’s you… well I know one thing, they never had romantic feelings for the King. They were his friends, not his lovers. If you’re falling for him, that’s definitely you.” *points and grin like an idiot* “Noël… this Diarmad you see here… he is a, let’s say… subdued version of the real man. Because of his weakness, of the imbalance of his soul, his personality is… muted. He will become himself in time. As a matter of fact, I’m really looking forward to your fights…” Grinning he raised his empty mug Oh? I sense my all time favourite scene will come in the near future 👀 I always had a thing for couples who get back at each other or when a good emotional scene occurs. “If you don’t want me sitting with you at the table, just say so. There is no need to bring Landyn or Ronan into this. I’m not the type to force myself on people.” Yes Noel! Say it! I remember how much I love this part. I recall when I read it a long time ago, this is the first time I read a character actively called out and confront when someone is avoiding them instead of merely holding it in and keeping quiet or just accept it. Nothing wrong with them but I always preferred this. It shows they have..substance in them in a sense? a strong personality of sort and won`t just take it in. Are we seeing potential King Noel`s behaviour here? *grin* He wrapped his arms around my waist, burying his face in my stomach Ah the fluff, the softness of lovers and emotions of love. How enduring love is especially when you wait centuries for it.

“How do you look…unaltered?” “Nobody knows anymore. The Seraei are old. We have forgotten.” Now this is new! If I am not mistaken *squint suspiciously* =-= Oh Diarmad, you didnt even apologize for endangering Noel? “It is called diplomacy, Noël. We were able to agree on a treaty eventually. As soon as I am deteriorating, I am to step down, and the Council will elect a new king. Probably Keelan McGill. However, as it is a known fact the McGills have been trying to get this position since the beginning of our time here, certain rules and prohibitions had been implemented into the treaty. Among them the strict ban on using any offensive powers in my or your presence other than to defend me.” He snorted. “That will be the day when a McGill defends me or mine. Since Moira is a physician, she was the logical choice to monitor my health; see if I was still able to do my duty. One of the conditions of the treaty was that she had to be always by my side. We knew she was spying on us; watching me to see if I broke the law by making contact with you before it was time.” As someone who had went through the above so many times, especially the diplomacy shit. Yes. Yes. Everyone knows what is going on, its an open secret but you can`t go after your enemy or someone who hurt you. That would be fatal and all you can do is watch them smirk at you because you know they know, they know you know and there is nothing that can be done except to go through it and win. Sometimes...the opposite can happen :DD Oh he apologized! and they look so cute bundled up together. Noel is angry, Diarmad is angry and even weakened he still acted like a king. Despite seconds away from clicking the next chapter. Seeing the mild cliff hanger and suspension *cough* frustrates me. I want to know what happened next asap XD

*coos and melt* Noel, I can see more of his fierce personality here, I find it entertaining. I hope there will be growth for him as years comeby. Some actions or words spoken help added more zing? kick? to the characters personality. Like an antique mirror now polished. Diarmad, you are indeed a king. Power show to inflict mental damage on opponent is a must no matter what. Now, did I said no matter what? I hope I did because I wonder what will happened next. So many things like body language, quick thinking done all to help him get a semblance of upperhand to Keelan. Oh damnit Keelan. I dont like you. My memory is vague but I hope I will have the delight of seeing Diarmad cook in the future~

I am thinking between Old Fashion or Bourbon Sours for myself but I would put orange, cranberry and a cinnamon stick for garnish in the second one 😅 If I am curled up cozy however, I would just spiked my egg nog. But then again its a matter of question if I want to get up or not. Hell, I would just modify a rum and coke to look festive. Sometimes its a matter of taste and mood. Snacks: Christmas cookies for sweet, a flaky savoury pastry for...savoury. But the fun part is fending off my cats I dont have snow but I do like doing snow related things...you have made me think. Which is bad because now I want to experiment