Tyler_4

Thank you both very much for the advice. I'll think about what you have both said and decide on what I want to do. I'll also look into some of the things you were telling me about Emulated. Thanks very much to both of you again, .

I started writing this almost two months ago. I only have the first chapter done, I had always planned on writing more of it, but school has gotten in the way as well as some unpleasant...events. I was kind of wondering, do any of you sometimes have to force yourself to just sit and write something more? Or do you wait until you're totally comfortable and then write? I know I haven't been in the best mood with things lately, but i can't help but wonder if maybe i should just force out some more. It sounds bad when I say 'force' but that's only for lack of a better term I think. It's not like I have some kind of huge fan following either, so there's no pressure there. Just wondering what some of you think. In case anyone is interested this is the link to my story: http://www.voy.com/17262/6/11195.html ( um, is this ok posted here? It's in the archives of Com's library forum, but I'm still unsure. I don't wanna step on any toes) Maybe everyone can muscle me into writing more, I'm just not sure. Also, on a side note, how the crap do I change the thing on the side to say that I'm an author now too??? lol :wacko: I appreciate any and all opinions on my question, thanks .

I have a feeling that there would be more breaks from writing if there were hot studs working for you Com, lol. AND I very much doubt that you would be 'relaxed' lol, more likely you would be overly...*ahem* excited, lol.

Wow, lol, I guess you did respond. Now I feel silly . I thought I had the thing set to give me an email alert when someone posted something new, oh well. Thanks for the welcome. Get this, I think I talked my friend out of being a homophobe!! LOL Well it wasn't all me, he had to have a bit of an open mind to even hear me out in the firs place, but I really think I got to him. I just was telling about it, and saying things like to get him to think on how it would be if you couldn't just show your affection for the person you really liked anywhere you wanted to. He said he was ok, I still think he might be a tad uncomfortable with it, but I'm working on him. He did end up asking some interesting questions though, kinda out of no where. He was asking me if I was born with it or did I become gay. I told him everything I knew about how it had been for me. I think he got it too, but to be honest, I think those questions might have been more for himself...I can't be sure though. I mean there's a reason I thought he might be gay in the first place, lol, but he didn't get that either and I had to explain a little about just how many hide so well, myself for instance, and I told him that's why I told him about myself and asking him, cause really its the only way to be absolutly sure. He's been kinda strange lately, and I think he might be wondering about himself right now, but I can't be sure and I don't wanna push him to talk about it. Waiting on stuff is the worst, but man, I really really hope he comes to some kind of revelation about himelf and turns out to be gay . What I wouldn't do for that smile of his...lol. I'll cool my jets until I figure out what's on his mind though. Thanks for the advice and everything too I appreciate it .

*looks down and kicks dirt* how come I didn't get a special thing for my first post?? *sniffle* so unfair...this is my second now, oh well, haha. I love Comsie's stories, he's inspired me to write my own even . My fav is GFD and I'm digging Skylight now too. All the different perspectives in it are great, well, so ends my second post. Not nearly as epic as my first, haha. On a side note, everyone talking about being biased in a poll which is basically asking for their opinion, erm, which is in itself biased, right? lol, so you should be biased and be proud!! haha

Well...I'm new here, this is my first post, and given the recent situation I put myself in I figured this was a good place to start posting. I recently made a new friend, he was so cool and nice and seemed to wanna talk about things in a deeper more meaningful way compared to most of my idiot brainless friends. He actually cared about other people genuinely, just like I did. Every time I saw that smile of his and his eyes brightened up my world was just a tad better than before. I was never really sure if he was straight or not. I don't know about telling if someone is or not, when i fell into being gay around 14 I shut everything down straight away. My town is a small hillbilly sort of place, i grew up almost being raised to be homophobic. It was like I just coasted through high school and into college. I knew more in college, but I never really faced it not until one day. I was walking to class, there were two guys in front of me they were really close together almost holding hands a few times. I just wondered...then they had to part ways and they kissed! Just a little kiss on the lips, short, sweet, a little 'see you later' and then they parted. I stopped right in the middle of the sidewalk for a second just kind of shocked. Then I realized I was smiling, and try s i might it wouldn't leave my face. That's what snapped me out of whatever I put myself into, that one little thing, It felt so so so right to me to see it. That's when I knew who I really was. So this is all still pretty new to me and I'm not too sure how to handle things. I kept trying to figure out if this new friend of mine was gay or not, it drove me crazy for a week. He was then he wasn't, I had no idea what I was doing(honestly I still don't). I finally decided to just tell him about me and that I liked him a bit. I thought the worst that could happen was he would just say he wasn't gay and sorry. He was a very understanding person, I figured even if it didn't work out he was really the best guy friend for me to tell first. But...that didn't work out so well, the homophobia bullcrap just swept him right up. He said he was really freaked out and that I had crossed the line wth him. I got this message from him in an e-mail: "Hey, You freaked me out, I'm not gay by any means if you couldn't tell. I really dont wanna do this but, I think its for my best interest not to talk or be around you until your thoughts clear and you do see me like that. Because I'm not going to lie to you. I really didn't feel comfortable around you late night. I'm cool with gays and bi until they hit/think thoughts about me and then I have to do what I'm doing right now... Which I really don't like. Sorry until this passes, I don't feel comfortable around when were by ourselves." Before I read that I was gonna do my best to be cool, he told me he wasn't gay, ok I get it, no problem. I told him if he needs time or whatever thats ok. But after I read that message of his...I'm sorry but I was a little pissed off...I mean when I talked to him about it he says he can't even be near me?? what?? All of the sudden I become some kind of gay rapist who's gonna jump him as soon as we get alone!! Come on...I really thought he'd be more open minded, but nope...*sigh* This post is probably longer than it ought to be but oh well, I just thought this kind of fit in with what was happening to me as far as the whole 'social stigma' thing. My answer to the question? No. I don't know if there's a god or not, but I do think I'm this way for a reason. I'm also unwilling to change the person I am so much, because I believe thats what would happen. I mean, I don't even drink because I'm uncomfortable with the idea of myself changing even a little bit by my inhibitions lowering. So, I guess this is my introduction too, haha. Hi everyone!! I'm working on my own story too. Com has inspired me to write and I feel dandy about it so...blah blah blah. I'll be around I guess nice to meet everyone!