The Dance [Mychyl Kime] - 1. Chapter 1

"You know what I like most about high school?" my best friend Jacob asked me.

Oh, by the way, maybe I should introduce myself... My name is Kyle. Kyle Carmody. I'm 17 years old, and go to Ukiah High School in the small, backwater town of Ukiah, California, population 2000 or so. It's tragic, too... everyone knows everyone else in this town... but no one really knows me, of course...

"No, J, what?" I ask him, chewing on a strand of flaxen hair that falls across my face as I stare at him, hoping he doesn't notice. After all, he's only ther cutest guy on campus... At 16, he is already taller than me, with his short black hair and piercing blue eyes... and the body! So many nights I cried myself to sleep, wishing that I could just hold him close... not that I could, since he's not only the most perfect guy at my school, but also completely straight... and he, like everyone else, has no clue about me... which, for now, is the way I prefer it.

"All the cute girls, everywhere," he sighs lustily. See what I mean? He's not even paying attention to me, really! All he wants to do is go snuggle up with one of those bimbos, have sex, have kids, get some mid-class job... and where do I fit in? Nowhere... so much for best friends, I suppose...

As we walk across campus to our next class, he proceeds to tell me all about his crush: Rachel Milliken, the girl who lives down the street from him. All right, I confess, she's pretty cute... for a girl, that is. But hey, what am I, chopped liver? I mean, she's older than he is... I mean, so am I, but she's REALLY older. Like, as in, she's 19, living with two other girls... they all go to the college together.

Suddenly, I hear a familiar voice, just outside the gym...

"Hey, 'bout time you get here, slackers!" David calls. David is Jacob's older brother, about my age, and they look alike... kinda. I mean, in the face and all, they're the same, but while Jacob is thin and lithe, a born swimmer, David looks like he was born to lift weights, or something like that. Oh yeah, and did I mention, David's gay too?

"Ah, shut it, Davey," Jacob says nonchalantly, then continues talking about dear Rachel. How she's in the show choir this year... and in a play... and doing charity work... and blah blah blah... David seems about as excited to hear about Rachel's exploits as I am, and quickly pulls me to the side.

"So, Kyle," he half-whispers, "you wanna hang out tonight?"

"Nah, got a lot of homework to get outta the way... not to mention track practice..."

"Shit, ditch track... we both know you can if you want. You're the captain, after all."

OK, so he has a point... if I really want to, I can ditch track today, and homework isn't as hard as I make it out to be. So why am I always avoiding David, ever since he came out? Simple enough... if I hang out with him too much, I'll get outed... and I can't let that happen, not the way this town is. Only reason David doesn't worry about that is, he could pound any gaybasher into the ground without breaking a sweat.

"OK, OK, you win. Damn, you always win..."

"Of course I do," he grinned. "I know your weaknesses..."

Finally, my promise in hand, he walked off, whistling a little tune as I ran to catch up with Jacob.

"CARMODY!" a loud, domineering voice called from down the hall as soon as I entered the gym.

"Yes, Sir?" I responded to Coach Clark, a large, overbearing man in his late 30s who made sure all 'his' star players were doing exactly what they were supposed to do... which is to say, he yelled a lot, and made us go to classes, and that's about it.

"What in Hell do you think you're doing, showing up 5 minutes late to my class?"

"Sorry, Sir, I got distracted on the way..."

"Distracted, huh? Keep your mind on the team and off the girls, and you might actually win a meet next time. Now get in there and dress down... NOW, I said!"

Without wasting another moment, I ran through the doors to the locker room and practically flew across the room to my locker, unlocking it as quickly as I could, paying as little attention as possible to those around me.

OK, here's my main weakness: I can't stand being in the locker room, because every time I am, I always come close to getting caught looking at the guys around me. Now, I'm not saying I can't control myself... although most of the time, I can't. I don't get it... I mean, David has no problems in the locker room, and everyone knows he's gay... no one knows about me, and I'm worried all the time about looking, even for a moment, and getting caught.

Luckily for me, I'm the only guy on any team this period, so I have a locker back with the team lockers, away from all the others, so I don't have to worry as much... not like I do before and after track practice, when all the lockers in my section are in use, and the aisles where I change are filled with other guys in various states of undress...

I kick my shoes off, then my jeans, throwing them into the locker, and pull out my blue shorts... part of the school's PE dress code. I quickly exchange my t-shirt for my gym shirt, then throw my shoes back on and lock my backpack into the locker, running to join the others in my class...