The Dance [Mychyl Kime] - 6. Chapter 6

I woke slowly, enjoying the warm glow of David's body heat upon mine, feeling a sense of quiet, gentle contentment, both within myself and David.

"Good morning, sleepy," he cheerfully whispered into my ear, followed by a soft, playful kiss. "I thought you were gonna sleep over, the way you were going."

"Well, not really," I answered, slowly stretching to revive my sore, overworked muscles, smiling back at him. "I mean, ya know, I'd be in so much trouble if I didn't show up at home tonight... ESPECIALLY if she found out I was with you the whole time!"

He hung his head a little, as though ashamed of his reputation. "I can understand; hell, if my parents were ever here, I'd be in trouble myself!" He chuckled a little bit. "I guess that makes it lucky for both of us that they're never home, huh? Otherwise, this might've never happened..."

I thought about that a bit. Yeah, he's right; if it wasn't that his parents spent all their time away on business, we might've never gotten any further than friendship, but as things are, here I am, lying naked in his arms, feeling contented and loved.

His eyes caught mine for a moment, locking me in a deep gaze. "Do you realize how much I like you?" he asked in a subdued voice, as though almost afraid to do so.

"You told me," I answered in an offhand tone, trying to play it cool, but then changed my mind. "And of course, you realize I'm starting to fall for you, too..."

His eyes widened in shock, his heart visible within. "Really?" he asked, almost selfconsciously, like he didn't really believe it.

Rather than answer, I leaned into him, brushing my lips across his, then holding the kiss, our bodies entwining once more, seemingly of their own accord, pressing together passionately. He moaned lightly, his hands running my body as far as they could reach, while mine did the same on his body, exploring him thoroughly.

Suddenly, I noticed the clock on his bedside table and broke our kiss, swearing vehemently.

"What's wrong?" he asked. Was that concern I heard in his voice? Concern for me? This was better than all the sex: I could love someone who cared about me, without even thinking about the sex.

"What is it?" he asked again, breaking me from my moment's reverie.

"I gotta get home... my mom's expecting me." I relaxed into him for a moment, enjoying the peace that his mere presence, the warmth of his body, brought over me. Then I got up, throwing on my clothes as fast as humanly possible. Once redressed, I gave him another kiss, this time a quick one, as I got ready to leave.

On the way down the stairs, I ran into Jacob yet again.

"What are you doing?" he demanded angrily.

"Leaving," I countered. "What's it look like?"

"From my brother's room, no less, and all mussed," he sneered at me. "So, what were you doing up in there? Fucking my brother, you damn faggot?"

I froze. Here I was, talking to the one person I ever called my best friend. Hell, until recently, he WAS my best friend. And he has the nerve to taunt me like this! Well, two can play this game...

"Yeah, I was, and yeah, I am," I retorted, feeling the blood rush to my cheeks in response to the anger welling up inside me. "So what? What, exactly, are you gonna do about it?"

OK, I admit. I went a little further than I planned. But hey, I can be forgiven, right? Heat of the moment, and all that good stuff. It doesn't change the fact that it hurt, and hurt badly, to talk to Jacob like this; however, he wanted to know. He wanted the truth. And that's exactly what he got: the truth.

"You know," I continued, ignoring the shame and embaressment evident on his face, "I can't believe that, finally, I'm telling you this. I never believed that we'd ever fight, especially over something so trivial as a girl! I mean, c'mon, obviously we were nowhere as good of friends as I thought... How could I have ever loved you?" I concluded, then realized what I'd said.

"What?" he asked, startled. "What do you mean?"

OK, cat's outta the bag; might as well run with it, I figured. "Yeah, I had a crush on you. I have for the longest time... I thought that, some day, somehow, we would wind up together. But now I realize that you aren't the same person I thought you were. I always thought you were a kind, caring, loving person, someone who would stand beside me, whether in friendship or otherwise, forever. And now look! You've totally changed... you don't want anything to do with me because your crush wants me, and can't have me. Does that make sense at all? I mean, it doesn't to me, not one little bit. But hey, if you wanna just call off our friendship 'cuz Rachel got hurt, having a crush on me, then hey, I'll find my way outta your life. But David likes me, and since you don't want anything to do with my life, I guess he's the only person I can trust anymore, so I'm sure you can expect to see me around still..."

He pushed his way past me, running towards his bedroom, slamming the door behind himself.

~Were those tears I saw in his eyes?~ I speculated, the momentary concern cancelling out all my pentup anger and frustration towards him; instead, all I felt now is towering self-loathing. ~Great... he wasn't really all that serious about the whole deal, and now you've forced him out of your life, possibly forever... and hurt him in the process. Are you happy with yourself? Doesn't it feel good, knowing that your best friend is in there, crying his eyes out?~

That was all I could handle. I ran back up the stairs to his room, tears threatening my own eyes, passing David's door without more than a passing thought... I needed Jacob, needed him to be happy again, and in a way, I thought maybe Jacob needed me, as well...

I turned his doorknob, which he forgot to lock... something, which I might add, he never forgets, another forfeit to his mood at the moment. The door swung open, revealing Jacob lying on his bed, sobbing deeply, uncontrollably, wrenching my heart with each passing moment as I crossed the room to him, going with emotion rather than intellect and taking him into my arms, holding him close, hoping that this was enough to make it all alright once more... and maybe, just maybe, this would change things around a lot... but even if nothing changed, and everything went back to the way it was, I'd still be happy, just to have Jacob close to me still.

OK, I know, it sounds like something from a cheap Harlequin novel. So what? I don't care if it sounds cheesy; it's how I felt... and for that matter, how I feel... and I wouldn't change that for the world, no matter what.

He finally stopped crying and looked up at me, his eyes red and puffy from crying too much. "I... I love you," he stammered, to my utter shock. Feeling poleaxed twice in the same day... this was proving to be an interesting day.

"Really?" I asked, astonished. "You do?"

"Yeah, I do," he replied, pulling my body closer to his. "I really love you... I have for as long as I could remember, but you were always so distant, even when you were right there with me, that I thought it could never be, not between the two of us... And then I tried going after Rach, to get my mind off of you, and how hopeless that was, and instead she's falling all over you, and you don't even notice her half the time... And now, spending all your time with my brother, who I know is gay, and who I know likes you, maybe even as much as I do... it's hard... I mean, like, REALLY hard, knowing that I love someone who might not even be interested in someone like me, but might like my own brother... it hurts, I guess..." He broke down into tears once more, my cue to jump in.

"Well, now you know... I've loved you since we met, and I can't change that, even if I want to... which, by the way, I don't. I've wanted to tell you, in hopes you felt the same for so long... but every time I thought I could finally tell you, that I could finally find out, all you ever seemed interested in is girls... me as a friend, sure, but I never had any idea of anything more..."

"That's the thing," he stated matter-of-factly, wiping away his tears unconsciously. "I never wanted you to guess, because I had no clue about you, about how you would feel, and I didn't want to take a chance of losing our friendship if you were straight or something... and then all this happened last night, with Rachel, and..."

"Ssh, don't worry," I interrupted, "it's OK... I understand, I really do. I'm just glad I know now that you really do feel for me the same I do for you..." With that, I slowly move my mouth closer to his, brushing my lips softly over his, enjoying the slow fire that seemed to consume my soul from that one touch. He moved closer, pressing his lips against mine with a desperate need, our bodies lost in time and space to the love we both desired, but were never able to speak of to each other until now...