Aaron's Dilemma - 1. Dad's Promotion

The alarm goes off again and I ignore it this time around.

My boyfriend nudges me. “Baby, turn it off.”

“You turn it off,” I mutter, throwing the blanket over my head.

Slade’s warm body drapes across mine as he leans over to stop it. He flops onto his back. “Aaron, get your ass up, or you’re gonna be late for work. If you wait too late you won’t have time to shower.”

Grabbing my boyfriend of two years, I snuggle in closer to him and kiss his neck. “You like it when I don’t shower.”

His face scrunches. “Usually, but not now, you’re ripe.”

“What if I call out? I don’t want to go to work today anyway. This is the start of our summer vacation.”

“If I have to work today, you have to work today,” he answers with sleepy laugh when I nuzzle his neck. “We have a lot of plans this summer and it costs money. Now, get that cute ass of yours out of my bed, and go to work.”

“Fine, Jones, I’ll go, but only if you give me a kiss.” I pucker up waiting for him to lean in.

“No, I have morning breath.”

“Me, too. It’s never stopped us before,” I tell him, puckering up again.

With a half-smile, he kisses me, playfully nibbling my bottom lip, and when I return the favor, he moans. I don’t know how much time has passed so I reluctantly check the clock. I have about ten minutes to get on the road, when I move from under him, he groans.

The lamp by his bed only partially lights his garage apartment. He mutters throwing the blanket over his head. Knowing I have to rush now, I wash up quickly, and run a brush through my shaggy, unruly mop of blond hair. My light brown eyes are a little red from lack of sleep.

Slade appears next to me placing his head on my shoulder. He yawns softly. “Are you coming over later?”

“Yeah, but I’ll go home first to shower considerin’ you distracted me this morning from taking one.” I make a stupid face in the mirror making him laugh.

“Okay. I’m only working until three today, so I’ll be here. You know Pa’s gone fishing with Clay, Kev will be off somewhere with Shelly, and Mama has the other’s out shopping and visiting Auntie Bernie in Norfolk.”

“We could’ve had so much fun with everyone out the house if we both didn’t have to work,” I say wrapping my arms around his waist. Slade locks his arms around my neck, and kisses me lazily while his fingers skim through my hair.

He smiles slyly when we break apart. “We definitely could’ve had some fun.”

I stare into his sapphire-blue eyes and nearly get lost in them. “I gotta get goin’.”

“See you later, baby.”

“Later, Jones.”

With another kiss and a heavy swat to my ass, Slade ushers me out the door to greet the dewy morning. I’m off for another fun-filled day of selling/cutting lumber to inept homeowners.

<><><><><><>

I didn’t understand why I wasn’t like my other friends. Up until the age of twelve, we all felt the same way about girls… that they were gross, but I never out grew those feelings. It wasn’t until I was thirteen that I’d started to put the pieces together. I was and am gay. I didn’t understand what it meant. However, the day I met Slade Jones, I began to understand. His family moved from Norfolk, VA to my small town of South Hill, VA to be closer to his grandfather. I thank God every day that they did.

When he walked into homeroom, I felt this instant connection to him. The feeling of everything I’d ever need or want was standing right before my eyes, and it scared the hell out of me. However, at fourteen, how could I even begin to comprehend what I was thinking and feeling?

The first two years of our friendship were the toughest. The more we hung out, the harder I fell for him, but I kept my feelings to myself. I couldn’t risk losing him, so, I had to be content with him just being my friend.

Everything changed the night that Slade kissed me. We were sitting outside cooling off on the bleachers during a school dance, when he leaned over, and his soft lips touched mine. He took my stunned silence as a rejection and ran. I chased him down. He begged me not to hit him, and started rambling. So, I kissed him to shut him up.

From then on, we were Aaron and Slade, though no one else knew.

We haven’t talked about the prospect of coming out to our families and friends. I would rather not. I’m not ashamed but I can’t break my parent’s heart by telling them their only son is gay. Not after all of the things they’ve done for me. I might tell them eventually but not any time soon.

Around others, we’re pals, acting like straight teenage boys, talking about and dating girls. We made a pact never to do more than kiss the girls we take out. We date enough to keep people from asking questions. Keeping up the pretense that we're both into girls is tiresome and takes a toll.

I love spending time with Slade because there are no worries or pressure. We can be our cheesy, stupid selves. But it’s hard getting that alone time with us both being athletes, students and working after school jobs. He has a large family too. He’s the oldest of six plus his parents. So sometimes, it’s easier to hang out at my house, when we have the time.

The one major aspect of our relationship that I can’t wait to change is our virgin status. It’s hard sharing a bed with him knowing nothing is going to happen. I want Slade so much but I know he’s not ready. He’s shut me down each time I’ve tried. I have had plenty of nights when it was just my hand and me. In the past three months, we celebrated his 18^th birthday, and our two-year anniversary, yet still nothing. Therefore, I’ve taken a step back with the hope that he’ll let me know when he’s ready. I love him enough that I’ll wait for however long it takes.

I don’t just love him. I’m in love with him. We’ve never expressed the word aloud to each other, I know he loves me, and I’m sure he knows I love him too. Most couples who’ve been dating for two years have already passed both of the precipices of sex and/or declaring their love, but we’re not the typical relationship, and I tell him this all the time. It works for us, and I don’t care what anyone else might think.

<><><><><><>

Driving to work, I think back to how I might not have met Slade at all.

When I was ten years old, I had a routine checkup at the doctors; he discovered a lump in my neck. I knew three things: it could be nothing, I would have to take a pill for the rest of my life, or it was cancer. The chance of it being serious like cancer was something I didn’t grasp at my age. After the biopsy and test, I learned it was Thyroid Cancer.

After having my thyroidectomy, I didn’t have to go through chemotherapy but I did have radioiodine therapy. It killed my taste buds. I could’ve had the hottest pepper known to man and I wouldn’t have been able to taste it. Because I couldn’t taste I barely ate, so drinking meal replacement shakes balanced out my diet.

I thought it was over. I was wrong.

During a follow up a few months later, my doctor discovered that I had Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, and told me I would have to undergo chemotherapy.

My little sister, Candace, never left my side. She watched over me like a hawk, helping Ma whenever she could. She read to me from her little books, watched television, or played board games with me. Even when I was mean, she was there. I knew she needed her big brother to get better so I could be there to watch out for her. So I did what could and prayed the cancer would go away.

Ma wouldn’t let me wallow in self-pity. She made me study and do homework. I kept up with school because of her. Dad was there. He taught me so much. But what stuck out the most for me, one day I asked him why he was crying because men don’t cry. And he told me, “A man can cry and still be a man. Don’t be afraid to cry, kiddo, especially when it’s for someone you love.”

We got through my illness and I’ve been in remission for over five years. I passed my yearly check-up seven months ago and have nothing holding me back. My life is smooth sailing.

<><><><><><>

My work shift is finally over. I drive home knowing without a doubt that my ass needs to take a shower. I’ll pop in, spend about thirty minutes with the family, and then head over to Slade’s place.

Upon closing the front door, Dad calls out, "Aaron, can you come to the kitchen?"

"Yes, sir."

Dad smiles when I enter the kitchen but there’s something up, which has me on the defense immediately. He lets out a small breath of air. "I wanted to tell y'all together, but your mama and sister got it out of me, so now it's your turn to know too."

I stand on the opposite side of the counter and mimic his posture. "Uh-huh?"

"I got the promotion I wanted,” he announces with a small smile.

"Awesome, Dad, I'm happy for you!" I walk over, giving him a huge hug and a pat on the back. I step back only to see the look is back on his face. "What's up? Why aren't you dancing around? You’ve wanted this promotion for months.”

"I know, but you haven't heard the whole story. When I went for the promotion the job was based in Richmond, but now, it's in Boston."

"Boston's not that far, Dad. It's only about an hour away. It’s not that big a deal."

"Aaron, not Boston, Virginia… Boston, Massachusetts," Dad stammers.

"You're moving to Massachusetts for how long?"

Dad takes a few seconds before he replies, "Here’s the thing, we're all moving to Boston."

My first thought rushes to Slade. I'm not leaving him. There’s no way in hell!

“I don’t wanna to go, Dad. This is my senior year. I’m co-captain of the baseball team. I’m eighteen. I can stay here without you,” I state brusquely.

“Watch the attitude, young man,” Dad snaps.

“I’m sorry, sir,” I reply looking him square in the eyes.

“You have no say in the matter, kiddo. I know you wanna stay, but while you are in school, your place is with your family. Besides, with your medical history, your mama will never allow you to be away from her. Yes, by the time we leave, you will be eighteen, and considered an adult, but you depend on your mama and me to provide for you.”

“I haven’t been sick in over five years, Dad. Ma’s overreacting, I’m not gonna get sick again. The doctors said to go on living my life and I am. Why can’t I stay with Uncle Bobby?”

Dad walks to the fridge and grabs a beer. “One, the doctors have said there is a very small chance that you could get sick again, even after the five-year mark. I know you’re not gonna get sick again but there is always that chance. Second, your uncle isn’t the best influence on you. He got you grounded for six months for that fiasco at the bar.”

“You can’t blame him for what happened. It was just as much my fault as it was his. How about Auntie Trish, can I stay with her?”

“She’s not gonna take care of a teenager. She loves you, but it’s not happening.”

“Dad-?”

“STOP! It’s final. You’re coming and I don’t want to hear another word about it. Do you hear me?” Dad asks, placing his hands flat on the counter.

Looking down, I say the only thing I can, “Yes, sir.”

Dad walks over. I can see the remorse in his eyes. “I’m sorry, kiddo. I really am. But you’ll see this move will be the best for all of us.”

“I doubt it,” I mutter.

“We don’t leave until the last week of August. That’s plenty of time for you to hang out with your friends. Go on. I have to talk with your mama,” he says, opening the beer and walking out the kitchen.

I don't take my intended shower; I instead make my way to Slade.

<><><><><><>

It takes me all of fifteen minutes to reach his house.

I hear country music playing from inside his garage apartment. Unfortunately, Slade’s younger brother, Kevin, is here working on his truck for the umpteenth time.

“When are you going to give up on that truck and get a new one,” I yell over to him.

“I’ll give this truck up when I can’t get her to run no more. I love this truck,” Kevin answers while rubbing the sides of it.

“I think you’re the only one,” I tell him laughing as he kisses the truck. “You’ve got problems.”

“Yeah, but this truck ain’t one.”

I chuckle and continue on to Slade’s room. I enter through the side door and find him lying on the bed. He's shirtless, wearing shorts, cross-legged with his eyes closed. I close the door behind me. He sings softly along to the twangy tune.

I watch him, wondering how I got so lucky to find him, only to leave him before summer’s end. All I want to do is run my fingers through his short, brown hair and kiss him until the world makes sense again. He opens those beautiful sapphire-blue eyes my way and smiles. Smiling back, I walk over and kiss him fully.

“Hey, baby,” he whispers, framing my face in his hands and kisses me again.

I lean my forehead against his. "Hey, Jones."

"Why are you here so early?" He caresses my cheek, and sniffs quietly. “I thought you were going to take a shower.

"I wanted to see you. I couldn't wait 'til later tonight." I bury my face in his neck. My emotions are all over the place, and I’m about to lose it. “I thought I could take my shower here.”

Slade pulls away slightly. “Is my brother still outside?”

Exhaling slowly, I lay back against the headboard, “He's working on his truck. He needs a new one.”

“Yeah, but I can’t say anything ‘cause at least he has a piece of shit truck. I’m the oldest and I don’t have wheels.”

“We all know why. Your driving sucks ass. How many tries did it take before you passed?”

“Four, but those fails weren’t my fault,” he says defensively, brows furrowing in that cute way when he's annoyed.

I try not to laugh. “You ran up on curbs, hit a mailbox, hit a parked car, nearly hit that guy on his motorcycle, and then you failed the written twice, what makes you think none of those were your fault?”

“'Cause I’m Slade Jones, awesome driver that’s why,” he answers with a smile.

“No, you’re not, and that’s why I won’t let you drive my truck. You barely passed last time.”

He rolls his eyes and scoffs, “You’ll let me drive it before the end of the summer.”

“Yeah, sure, by the end of the summer, that's not gonna happen.” I smirk. My demeanor changes and he notices it immediately.

Slade slides his hand into mine linking our fingers together. “Baby, what’s wrong?"

I hear the concern in his voice. I run my thumb back and forth against his. “It’s quiet. It’s so weird.”

“Aar, what’s wrong?” He asks again.

I avoid looking at him. “Um, uh, my dad got the promotion today.”

He turns my head towards him. “That’s a good thing, right?”

With a shake of the head, I answer, “No. The promotion he got is relocating him to Massachusetts. We’re going with him.” He gasps. I continue with the last bit of news. “We leave at the end of August.”

Slade look at me and laughs. “I call, ‘bullshit’. Ha! Ha! Ha! You’re moving to Massachusetts. Aar, the next time you want to joke. Try something a little more believable.”

The sad look in my eyes stops him cold. Right as he about to reach for me, there is a sudden knock at the door. I move to the other side of the bed before Kevin walks in.

“Hey, bro, I got the truck working. I’m goin’ down to the creek with Shelly and I’ll be back late. Tell mama for me, okay?” Kevin looks at the two of us. “What’s wrong? You look like you just watched some sad chick flick,” he asks stepping into the room.

“Aaron came over to tell me he’s moving to Massachusetts,” Slade answers reaching for the remote for the radio and turning it off.

“That sucks man, sorry. It's not gonna be the same without you. You are like another brother to me.”

The sincerity in his voice is palpable. “Thanks, man, I feel the same about you too.”

“Shit, I gotta get Shelly. We’ve gotta have a guys’ night before you leave, Aar. Live it up without the girlfriends around.” He jokes.

“Sure, it sounds good to me.”

“Alright, I’ll see y’all later.” Kevin shrugs with a slight smile. He walks out closing the door behind him.

Slade turns his attention back to me. “Aaron, I-I... do you have to go? Why can’t you stay with Bobby?”

“Yeah, after the bar brawl, Dad wouldn’t trust Uncle Bobby with supervising me make lemonade.” I give him a half chuckle. “He made it clear that I had to go.”

“What if we could talk him into letting you stay with my family?” Slade asks. The hope in his eyes is making this more unbearable.

The tears come to the surface. “It’s not gonna happen. Dad says I can’t stay here. What am I gonna do?”

He takes my hand and kisses it. "Baby, don't worry. We'll try to work something out to keep you here."

Looking into eyes, I ask, "What's gonna happen with us?"

“Baby, we don’t have to talk about that right now. I just want to take care of you." He smiles faintly. His eyes twinkle in the sunlight shining through the slits of the blinds with unshed tears.

A lone tear rolls down my cheek. Slade places his forehead against mine and tenderly wipes the tear away with the back of his hand. He gathers me in a huge embrace. He lays back with my head resting on his chest with my arm thrown across his waist and my legs entwined with his. His heart thumps against my cheek and his fingers comb through my hair. I breathe in the light mix scent of his natural musky scent and the soap he’d washed with. I bury my face into his chest and cry. He holds me, rubs my back, and soothes me with comforting words.

"Aar, it's okay. Don't cry, baby."

"I don't want to leave you," I say, barely able to get the words out.

Slade titters softly, "I don't want you to leave me either."

I don't know why but that makes me laugh. We laugh for a minute. I hug him tight. He plants several kisses to my forehead, nose, and lips.

We talk softly about nothing in particular. He’s making me feel better. He walks into his bathroom and starts up the shower. The hot water relieves most of my tension. When I’m finished, I put on the clothes Slade has waiting for me. He pops a cheesy comedy on, and gives me a much needed shoulder massage. After the massage, we cuddle and I fall asleep in his arms.

<><><><><><>

Ms April’s horn honks loudly. We realize we have but a few seconds to wake-up, go out, and greet her before she walks in, or one of his siblings. We quickly get ourselves together. We pause at the door. Slade kisses me before pulling away. “With them back, I wouldn’t be able to do that whenever I want. Ready?”

“Yeah, I’m ready.”

We step outside, shielding our eyes from the blinding sun, and walk over to greet his mom. Ms April is at the back of her SUV grabbing bags of food and clothing.

“Hey, guys. Slade, I grabbed you a couple more work shirts. Do you think you might need more than that?” His little brothers and sister bound out of the car fighting as usual. “Will y’all shut up? You’re driving me bonkers. Grab some bags and get in the house now.”

Juliet, the baby of the family, and only girl runs over to Slade, and he picks her up. “Slay, Slay, I missed you,” the six-year-old squeaks. “Davy won’t leave me ‘lone. He pulled my hair all day. I tell him to stop but he didn’t. You tell him to leave me ‘lone.” She wraps her little arms around his neck, and he rubs her back.

If looks could kill, Davy, at nine-years-old would be dead. Everyone knows not to mess with Juliet because Slade would hand them their ass.

We’re alike when it comes to our little sister. Don’t fuck with her and there won’t be any problems. He might not be super tall standing at 5’7”, but he has an imposing demeanor due to him playing football his whole life. I outweigh him by twenty pounds and stand at six-feet tall, and there are times when I find him intimidating. So, Davy must be shitting bricks right about now.

“Is that so?” He takes a step towards his brother. “Get your butt over here now and apologize to Jules before I make you regret it,” he growls, setting Juliet down and crossing his arms. Davy mumbles an apology. “Nah, do better than that. I don’t think she heard you.”

“I’m sorry, Jules. I won’t pull your hair no more,” the boy states louder.

Looking down at her, he asks, “Do you feel better?”

“Yes,” she nods staring up at him. “Tank you.”

“You’re welcome. Okay, it’s over, no more fighting. Y’all do as Mama said. Grab some bags and get in the house. Jules, can you carry Mr. Waffles and a bag?” Slade asks, handing the lightest bag and her stuffed bunny to her

“Don’t be silly. I’m a big girl now. I can do it,” Juliet states boldly, grabbing both from his hands.

Without backtalk, the trio disappears into the house with bags in tow.

“I swear. The way you handle them, honey, you’re gonna make a wonderful father one day,” Ms April says with a smile of admiration. Slade blushes. “Anyway, back to the shirts. Do you want me to get you more?” She asks again.

“No ma’am. Should be fine with the ones you got me, but if I need more I’ll go get me some,” he replies, grabbing the groceries from her arms. "Oh, Kev, got his truck working and took Shelly down to the creek, he'll be back late.”

"That kid acts like Shelly and his truck are the most important things in this world," she says shaking her head. She smiles at me. “Hey, Aaron.”

I give her a hug and kiss on the cheek. “Hi, Ms April.”

She puts her hand to my forehead and cheeks. “Aaron, honey, are you okay? You look a little flushed.”

“Not really, I came over to tell Slade that I’m moving. I guess I haven’t recovered from the shock.”

“Oh, no! Where are you moving?”

“Massachusetts,” I answer trying not to cry.

“You don’t have to go do you?” Ms April asks with a low whine.

“Yeah, Dad made it quite clear that I have to go too.” I reach inside the SUV for the remaining bags.

“I don’t know what Slade is gonna do without you. You two have been practically inseparable since we moved here. Do you wanna stay for supper? I’m making my famous baked mac n’ cheese with hot dogs, it might cheer you up.”

“Okay with me but I gotta check in with the folks,” I tell her. We head into the house and help put the groceries away. I get the okay to stay. We go back to his room to watch a movie. About an hour later, Juliet grabs us for dinner.

Sitting at the dinner table, I look around at everyone. I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve had dinner with Slade and his family. I hate knowing this won’t happen again for a long time.

“Aaron, are you going to play baseball in Boston?” Ms April asks scooping food onto her plate.

“I don’t know. I haven’t thought that far in advance, but I can tell you I won’t be co-captain like I would’ve been here.”

"That sucks, honey. But you try your best and I’m sure you’ll do fine.”

“Thanks, Ms April.”

After dinner, we're hanging out in the family room when I realize how late it has gotten.

"I gotta get goin’. I have work tomorrow. I'll see y'all later."

Everybody says ‘bye’ and I head for the door.

"I'll walk you out, man. I wanna finish watching the movie from earlier anyway," Slade says, standing and following me to the door.

"Oh, Aaron, can you tell your mama to look for those extra mason jars? I plan on making preserves and I'm gonna need them," Ms April calls out from her seat.

"Yes, ma'am, I'll tell her." I answer before walking out the door and down the porch steps.

I hear Slade close the door behind me. The sounds of his feet on the gravel become louder as he reaches me.

"C'mere,” he whispers.

We step into his room. There's enough light from the moon for us to see each other. He smiles at me. My eyes linger on his lips. He steps in wrapping his arms around my waist. When he tilts his head back, I kiss him, and he moans when I deepen the kiss.

"Thank you for what you did earlier," I whisper in his ear when we break apart. “You made me forget about it for a while.”

"Baby, you know I'd do anything for you," he says, his voice wavering.

I close my eyes and hold him. A minute later, I reluctantly pull away from him. "I've gotta get home."

"Want to do to the dam tomorrow night?" Slade holds my hands in his.

"Definitely," I answer kissing him on the forehead. "I'll call you when I get home, okay?"

He nods. I turn to walk away and feel the sting of his heavy hand smacking my ass hard.

I laugh massaging my butt cheeks. "You'll pay for that later, Jones."

"Promise?" he asks coyly.

"I promise." I grab under his chin to make him look up at me, and lean down to kiss him, but walk away instead.

"You're cold-blooded, baby," he says loud enough for me to hear.

I laugh walking to my truck. All I know is, I don’t think I’ll be able to leave him. What am I going to do?