New Brother - 10. Chapter 10

I stood frozen as I watched the two kiss. For what seemed an eternity, they didn’t appear to notice me. When Scott’s eyes opened and he saw me standing there, the scene changed. Terror replaced the blissful expression that had been on his face. Breaking the kiss seemed to alert Adam, who half turned to see me standing in the doorway.

As they jumped apart, my body suddenly returned to life. Spinning quickly, I fled from the room and down the hall. Ignoring the cry of “What’s wrong?” from Randy, I burst through the kitchen and charged outside and started running.

There was a slight chill to the air, but it was not cold enough to bother me. Rather, it seemed to reflect my state of mind, as my body proceeded on autopilot. It was only as I found myself approaching the dam that anything like a rational thought emerged.

Scott’s gay!

I’d just gone through hell sorting myself out over Adam, and now I had my relationship with Scott to re-evaluate. My body started to tremble uncontrollably as I realised yet again that I don’t really know the people I call my friends.

While the moonlight illuminated the dam, the rock that forms my special resting place was still in shadow. Feeling it was strangely appropriate, I climbed up into the darkness and drew my legs up to my chest. Resting my head on my knees, I gazed back over the dam. My body was still shaking as I tried to calm down.

On Friday night I had spoken without thinking, and that had caused Adam a lot of pain. I didn’t want to do the same again, so I knew I needed to at least start sorting out what I felt about Scott before I spoke to him.

After my conversations with Gary, Michael and Brian over the last couple of days, I had slowly come to realise that my problems with Adam were not really with him being gay. Somehow, he had managed to interfere in my relationships with Liz and Randy, and that was the real source of our conflict. As long as Scott remained separate from those two, I shouldn't have a problem with him. The whole idea of being gay is something I still can’t understand, but that shouldn't stop me from maintaining my friendship with Scott.

Forcing myself to breathe slowly, I tried to let the noises of the night calm me down. I was surprised to realise that the normal small sounds were missing. The sound of someone moving through the trees was making all the animals keep silent.

Angry that someone had followed me down, I was surprised when Scott emerged from the trees and stood at the edge of the dam, looking around. Realising that he couldn’t see me in the shadows, I waited to see what he would do.

“Stick? Are you here?” he called out, tentatively.

Staying silent, I sat and watched him. He was nervous, that was obvious, but he seemed fearful as well. It was only as he turned away to leave that I saw that he was carrying a light jacket. As he was already wearing one, he had to have brought it down for me. Whether it was a peace offering or just being thoughtful, it showed he wasn't angry with me.

At that thought, I broke my silence.

“Break, I’m over here,” I said quietly, knowing that the sound would carry to where he stood.

He turned sharply back, and I could see him still trying to find where I was.

“On the rocks,” I called out. “Come sit up here with me. I think we need to talk.”

As he made his way around to where I was sitting, I examined him closely. Just like Adam, he appeared no different from the guy I’ve played basketball with for a couple of years now. Only now, I know something about him that I didn’t know before.

I reached out and helped him up onto the rock. Prior to this, the only person I’d ever shared it with was Liz, but that had been different. Oh, so different. Now I was sharing my private place with another guy. A guy who likes other guys.

I sighed. My world was changing, and I had no control over it. All I could try to do was to ride it out and hope that I’d be happy with where I ended up.

“David?” Scott asked, as he handed me the jacket.

As I put it on, I wondered how Scott had managed to imply so many things with that simple question. I chose to answer the easiest one first.

“You took me by surprise, Scott,” I said quietly. I gazed over the dam, rather than look at him. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to look at him, but I just found it easier to talk that way. “I was just coming to terms with Adam. I came into the room to tell him that I thought I had finally sorted myself out, and then I found the two of you.”

“I’m sorry, Stick,” he mumbled, as he put a hand on my shoulder in apology.

Involuntarily, I stiffened at his touch. Before I could relax, he quickly dropped his hand. Even without looking, I could feel him cringe at my reaction.

“Sorry, Break,” I said, as I finally turned to look at him. Realising I had to do more, I put a hand on his shoulder, echoing what he had done to me. “I didn’t mean to do that. I just wasn’t expecting it.”

As I felt the tension slowly fade from him, I realised that Scott was petrified. Not merely scared, he was terrified of what was happening or could happen. Unlike Adam, who was confronting the world with a “Take me as I am” attitude, Scott was still hiding.

I knew what he really needed, but I couldn’t bring myself to put my arm across his shoulder to comfort him. That might imply things I didn’t mean. Instead, I kept my hand where it was and waited for him to relax.

“Before we go any further, let’s make sure I haven’t misunderstood things,” I suggested. “I’m assuming you’re gay. Am I right?” I asked, gently.

He nodded. The shadows prevented me from seeing anything clearly, but the way he jerked his head indicated how even that admission had been dragged out of him.

“And you didn’t really need my help with English. That was just an excuse to come over and see Adam, wasn’t it?” I continued. I tried to keep my tone soft, as I felt he’d bolt at any sign of aggression.

He nodded again.

Remembering his brother’s comments from before the game on Saturday, I said, “Chris told me he had recently found out that a mate of his is gay. That’s you, isn’t it?”

“He caught me looking at gay porn on the Internet. It was hard to deny,” he answered softly.

“Adam told us he’s known he’s gay for a couple of years. What about you?”

“I’ve felt different for at least five years. I really only put a name to it a bit over a year ago. I’m still having trouble accepting it in my heart, even though my head knows it’s real.”

I thought about that for a moment. The anguish he was feeling was obvious. If he’s confused and having trouble coping, I could easily make things worse without meaning to.

“Scott, I made a lot of mistakes when I found out about Adam. I’m trying to not do the same thing with you. If I say something wrong, please tell me straight away.”

“Thanks, Stick,” he replied quietly.

Dropping my hand, I turned back to looking over the dam. I could hear the sounds of the night beginning to re-emerge.

“Adam’s kept your secret pretty well. He never even hinted that you’re gay,” I said, admiringly.

“He didn’t know.”

I quickly twisted around to look at Scott.

“He didn’t?” I asked, surprised. “But tonight? In Randy’s room?”

“I’d only just told him. It’s taken me two days to build up my courage enough to say something,” he said quietly. I could hear fear in his voice. He was still afraid of what was happening. “Chris keeps telling me it’s going to be okay, but it’s still been hard.”

“So, Chris is cool with all of this?”

“Yeah. He keeps telling me that he thinks Adam’s a great guy. He told me off last night as he took me home because I’d chickened out and hadn’t said anything.”

“And your parents? What do they think?”

Scott didn’t answer that one immediately. When I sensed him tensing up again, I guessed the answer that eventually came.

“They don’t know,” he whispered.

As I absorbed this bit of news, Scott started sobbing quietly. It was slowly sinking in what a traumatic time this was for Scott and probably for Adam too. Scott must be terrified of what his parents’ reaction will be. After what happened to Adam, he has reason to be.

As I watched Scott change from a confident teenager into a frightened boy, I felt my heart go out to him. He was showing me what he was feeling, even if he was doing it involuntarily, and his plight touched me in a way that Adam’s never had.

Taking a deep breath, I reached out, put my arm across his shoulder, and pulled him towards me. I’d deal with any consequences later. At that moment, he just needed someone. I had ruined my chances to help Adam, but maybe I could make amends by helping Scott.

I didn’t say anything as I held him. I just couldn’t think of what to say. Comforting a guy who’s afraid of what is going to happen because he’s gay is just too far outside of my experience.

His sobs gradually slowed down. When he straightened up and wiped his hand across his eyes, I let him go. Still watching him, I waited until he was ready to talk again.

“Thanks, Stick,” he eventually said.

“Glad I could help, Break,” I replied gently. “Do you want to keep on talking?”

“I think so,” he answered, hesitantly. “I’m just a bit of a wreck at the moment. I didn’t expect to break down like that.”

“That’s okay. I think I’m beginning to understand a little of what you’re going through. I’ll never understand completely, but you’re afraid of what’s going to happen, aren’t you?”

He nodded his head. “I look at what happened to Adam, and what Ian told us about that Craig guy, and I’m scared. I don’t want to lose my family,” he finished, forlornly.

“Cheer up!” I said, trying to inject some enthusiasm into what I was saying. “You’ve got Chris on your side, and you’ll always be welcome here. And not everyone’s family is like Adam’s or Aiden’s. Look at my family. Look at Ian’s. You don’t have to expect the worst!”

“I don’t think you understand, David,” Scott said quietly as he stared over the dam. “This is something that can only be done once. There won’t be a second chance. Once people know, that’s it. There's no turning back.”

“I think I see,” I replied, as I turned back to watch the moonlight over the dam. “I remember how nervous I was when I introduced Liz to my family. And that was about something that isn’t permanent. It must be a hundred times worse for you each time you tell someone, or someone finds out. You're right, I don't think I'll ever understand, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate it.”

“I've told one person, and two others have found out. I've been lucky so far, but will that continue?”

There was nothing I could say to that. The question wasn't really addressed to me anyway. As I sat and thought about what was going on, something struck me as a bit strange.

“Break, why are you here and not Adam? And shouldn't you be talking to him about these things? He’s your boyfriend now, isn’t he?”

“I don’t know about the boyfriend part. It’s a bit of jump from best friend to boyfriend. Neither of us know any other gay guys, and we know each other pretty well, so I’m hopeful. He's still very angry at you though, Stick. After you walked in on us, I just had to see how that’s going to change things. Adam told me to leave you alone, but I couldn't. Giant said you'd probably be down by the dam, so that's why I'm here.”

Curious about my brother, I asked, “What did you tell Randy?”

“Nothing for the moment. I sort of promised I’ll tell him when I get back. I'm not looking forward to that,” he answered quietly.

I laughed. “He's probably the safest person in the world to tell. Look at how well he's dealt with Adam! You don’t have to worry about telling him.”

“Yeah, I know. But it's still that 'only one chance' thing. I don't think I'll ever be comfortable telling anyone,” he replied, despondently.

“You’re going to have to sort something out about that if you want to have a chance with Adam. It’s going to be hard to be a couple without letting other people know that you’re gay,” I pointed out.

“Don’t remind me. I’m scared enough as it is. But I really want things to work out with Ads. I’ve been thinking about it ever since he told me.”

We sat in silence for a few minutes longer and then Scott spoke up again.

“Stick, I have to ask you something. Please don't get angry,” he pleaded.

Wondering what it was he wanted to ask, I replied amiably, “Sure, Break. Ask away.”

“You and Adam seem to hate each other’s guts at the moment. Why don't you hate me as well?”

I sensed, rather than saw, the tension in Scott as he waited for my reply. He was ready to bolt if I said the wrong thing.

“I don't know how much Adam has told you, but I didn't handle the news at all well when I found out about him. I said a lot of things that should never have been said. It took me a while, but I eventually realised that I'm not really bothered by his being gay.” I quickly added, “I don't understand it, but it's not really bothering me.”

“Then what's the problem?” he asked, still tense.

“On his side, he still hasn't forgiven me for what I said on Friday night. On my side, I only worked it out tonight, after talking it through with Gazza. Somehow, and it's probably mostly my fault, Adam has messed up things between me and Randy and me and Liz. Because I didn't understand it, I've been blaming him for my problems. I was actually going in to tell him that and to try to fix things up, but I found you guys kissing.”

“So you’re fine with me being gay?” he asked, anxiously.

I smiled. I knew he couldn't see it in the shadows, but I hoped he could he hear it in my voice.

“Yeah, I'm fine,” I said. “Just don't rub my nose in it. I don't really want to know any details about your sex life.”

I heard a soft chuckle. “My non-existent sex life? I think I can avoid telling you about that,” he said.

“Then I think we have a deal. Let’s go back to the house.”

“Okay,” he said, as he stood up.

Heading back, I remembered part of the conversation I'd had with Gary. I knew I shouldn't ask, but my curiosity got the better of me.

“Scott, while I was talking to Gazza, we touched on our favourite fantasies. Mine is Kylie, but neither one of us was sure who’s hot for a gay guy. You don't have to answer, but I was just wondering...”

He laughed. “After telling me you don't want to hear about my sex life, you want to know about my sexual fantasies?”

I raised my hands to fend off what was coming. “Okay, okay! Yeah, that was weird. Just forget I asked!”

“Nah. I've never told anyone, and you made the mistake of asking. Time to suffer the consequences,” he said, happily.

“I don't know about other gay guys, but for me it’s Ian Roberts.”

“Who? Never heard of him,” I said, puzzled.

“Not really surprising, as he's a former rugby player from New South Wales,” he explained. “Rugby's not that popular here in Melbourne.”

“Rugby!” I exclaimed. “What's wrong with an Aussie Rules player?”

“Nothing, but I don't know of any gay footy players. Ian's Australia's only top-level sportsman to come out as being gay. He did it while he was still playing, and went on to captain the North Queensland Cowboys. He also played for Australia thirteen times. He finally retired in 1999. As I know Ian's gay, I can always dream I have a chance with him. He's already got a boyfriend, but hey, we're talking fantasies anyway. Like you'd have any chance with Kylie Minogue,” he finished, laughing.

“Does this mean you're a rugby fan? You certainly know a lot about it.”

“Nah. Only about Ian Roberts. He's been one of the things that's always given me hope that I'll eventually be alright. After all, rugby's always been considered to be a very macho sport. If a gay guy can play the game at the top level and be generally accepted, then maybe I can make it in normal life. At times, I've really needed that hope,” he finished quietly.

I didn’t know what to say to that, and Scott didn’t say more, so we walked the rest of the way back to the house in silence. I had learnt more than I had expected in that short conversation. Scott only seems to be interested in other gay guys, which was good to hear. But disturbingly, it sounded like he suffers bouts of severe depression about being gay. With the research Randy and I had recently done on suicide risk factors, I started to wonder how depressed he really does get. He had never shown it before, but then I was finding out that there is an entire side to Scott that I'd never known existed.

When we walked into the house, I was still wondering what to do. Distracted by my thoughts, I was startled when Adam and Randy ambushed us.

Adam took one look at Scott's face, and then turned on me in fury.

“You're an utter bastard, David! What have you done to him? Couldn't you have kept your bloody mouth shut for once in your fucking life?” he yelled at me.

Bewildered by this verbal assault, I turned to look at Scott. He seemed thrown by Adam's reaction as well. Then I noticed that Scott's eyes were still red, and you could see tear tracks on his face. It was obvious that he'd been crying.

Adam grabbed Scott by the arm and started to pull him down the hall. “Come on, Scott. I won't let that bastard do anything more to you,” he said firmly.

Too slow to react, I just watched as the two headed off, Adam almost dragging Scott away. My parents came out of the living room as they went past, but Adam ignored their questions about what was going on. Only when Mum and Dad came down to the kitchen to speak to me did I pull myself back together.

“David, can you please explain what is going on?” Dad demanded. He looked angry, but he didn't appear to be blaming anyone, yet.

Mum kept sending worried glances down the hall as she waited for my answer. Randy’s face was still distorted from the broken nose, but I could tell he wasn't happy with me, either.

“Dad, I'm sorry, but I can't tell you. Only Scott can do that. It's not my place to say anything. All I can say is that I didn’t do anything to upset Scott. I was just able to be there for him,” I explained, praying for them to believe me.

“Then why did you go charging out of here so suddenly? And then Scott and Adam came chasing after you. It certainly looked suspicious,” Randy accused.

“Sorry, I can't tell you. Scott has to do that. I'd love to tell you, but I can't. Please believe me?” I pleaded to Randy.

He stared back to me for a moment before looking back to Dad. When I turned as well, I found Dad staring down the hall to where Adam and Scott had disappeared. When he started to head down to find them, I acted.

Stepping forward, I grabbed Dad by the arm. “Dad, wait! Give them some time alone, please? I'm sure Scott is telling Adam what he needs to know, and then he'll come out again.” I winced internally at my poor choice of words, but hopefully no one noticed the Freudian slip.

Stopping, he looked back at me. “Okay, David,” he said quietly, “but there had better be a good explanation for all of this. You're currently on very thin ice, young man,” he finished sternly.

While we waited, I looked at the schoolbooks on the table. Quickly deciding that I was in no mood for homework, I headed over to the kettle and started to make myself a cup of coffee and cups of tea for Mum and Dad. I didn’t know how long Adam and Scott would be, but I knew having a hot drink would help calm my parents.

By this stage, Randy had abandoned any pretence of doing homework. After packing up his books, he alternated between staring at me and staring down the hall. Mum had grabbed the newspaper and was seated opposite Randy. Dad and I were still standing, sipping our drinks.

That’s how we were when Scott and Adam reappeared.

Obviously startled at the attention that was suddenly focused on them, they paused before continuing into the kitchen.

“David, I owe you an apology,” Adam said, eyes downcast.

“That’s okay, Adam. I can imagine how it looked. Forget it,” I answered.

“Now will someone tell the rest of us what is going on?” Dad asked, eyeing Adam, Scott and me. His no-nonsense tone clearly indicated he was in no mood for excuses.

As one, Adam and I looked at Scott, who seemed to shrink into himself.

“Sorry, Scott. I told them that only you can say what’s going on,” I said, apologetically.

As he looked from face to face, I could see the fear in his eyes. I was trying to find some way out of this for him, when Adam stepped up and whispered something in his ear.

Scott looked at Adam, and then nodded. Smiling, Adam put an arm across Scott’s shoulder and turned to face everyone.

“I’d like to introduce you to my new boyfriend,” Adam stated proudly.

I almost laughed at the reactions. Randy’s jaw dropped so far that I’m surprised it wasn’t dislocated. Mum simply froze. Dad was so stunned that he forgot he was holding a cup of tea and ended up spilling the hot drink onto his pants. While he jumped around before grabbing a towel to dry himself, I walked over to the new couple.

“Congratulations, Adam,” I smiled, as I held out my hand.

He scowled at me before shaking my hand. He squeezed hard, but with an effort, I didn’t let anything show on my face.

“Well done, Scott,” I said, after Adam released his grip. “I know it was hard for you to let Adam say that.”

“What would you know?” Adam demanded.

I looked at him for a moment. Even though he was beginning to get on my nerves, I knew at the bottom of my heart that it was because I'd hurt him badly. Struggling to control my temper, I responded.

“Scott and I had a long talk when we were outside. No, I don't understand, you're right there, but I do appreciate something about how hard it must be.”

“Ads, let it be,” Scott said gently. “I know you and Stick are having problems at the moment, but just let it rest for now. Please?”

Adam's scowl faded to a soft smile as he looked at his boyfriend. “Okay, Break,” he said quietly.

Randy's mouth was still hanging open. I don't think he'd moved more than his head as he kept looking between Scott and me. Mum had a faint smile on her face as she looked thoughtfully at Scott and Adam. Dad, having calmed down from spilling his drink, was gazing off into the distance, looking worried.

“Dad, what's wrong?” I asked.

He focused back on me and smiled. “I think I've missed a parenting class somewhere along the line. I know what talk to give when one of my sons brings home a girlfriend,” he said, grinning as I shuffled my feet in memory of that talk, “but I don't think I know what talk to give when one of my sons brings home a boyfriend.” Still grinning, he looked over at Scott and Adam. “I'm going to have to think about that one for a while.”

Randy finally piped up. “Stick, you knew, didn't you?” he accused.

“Yeah, I did,” I admitted, grinning.

“When?”

“Just before I raced outside.” I paused as I worked out what I should say next. “I caught them kissing in your room.”

He blanched. “My room?” Turning to Scott and Adam, he demanded, “What have you two been up to?”

“Just kissing, Giant,” Adam responded, defensively. “Nothing more than that.”

“And that's enough for the moment,” Mum interrupted smoothly, as she stood up. “We'll work out some ground rules later. For now, come here you two. I want to give you both a big hug.”

As first Adam and then Scott hugged my mum, I noticed she whispered something to each of them. Adam seemed to take it in his stride, but Scott pulled away from her looking startled. He then smiled and gave her another hug.

While they were occupied, I pulled Randy across into the corner.

“Randy, Scott isn't ready for everyone to know yet,” I whispered. “Can you keep it quiet?”

“Okay,” he whispered back. Glancing over to where Adam was staring at Scott with a goofy grin, he continued, “But Adam is going to make it hard to keep it a secret if he keeps that up.”

Needless to say, we didn't get back to our homework after that. A question from Mum brought out the fact that Scott's parents don’t know yet. This time, Adam got to comfort Scott as he began to shudder with fear. It didn't take Adam long to calm him down, but I could see that Scott was still very much afraid of people finding out.

While Adam was calming Scott, I filled Mum, Dad and Randy in on the rumours that Gary had told me about. In particular, the rumour about Randy being gay.

Randy laughed. “I told you before, Stick. I'm not gay!”

“Yeah, but that won't stop people from believing the stories,” I replied.

“Listen to him, Giant,” Adam said from where he was standing with Scott, surprising both Randy and me. “You're going to be hassled, bumped and ostracized all day. When you're not being ignored, you're going to be constantly fending off extremely personal questions and remarks. This is no laughing matter,” he finished seriously.

“Yeah, but my friends aren't going to believe it,” he insisted.

“Trust me, Randy,” Adam said, as he left Scott to stand directly in front of my brother. “Even if they don't believe it, they're not going to act as if nothing has changed. They won't know what to believe, and that'll confuse them.”

I could tell that Randy wasn't sure, but a seed of doubt had been planted. I just hoped that it would be enough to make sure he wasn't too rash tomorrow.

Before anyone could say anything else, we heard a knock at the door. As we all turned to see who it was, Scott's brother Chris walked in.

“Hi, y'all,” he smiled. “I know I'm a little early, but I was bored at home. If you haven't finished your homework yet, I can wait.”

“No, we're all finished,” I said. “We were just talking about school, that's all.”

I could see Chris asking a silent question of Scott. It was then I realised that neither Scott nor I had mentioned that Chris knows that Scott's gay. Curious as to what he'd say, I kept quiet as my mum asked Chris if he'd like a cup of tea or coffee.

After Scott shook his head, Chris scowled for a second. Wiping that expression from his face, he turned to where my mum and dad stood. “A cup of coffee would be great. Thanks, Mrs. Johnson,” he answered with a smile.

Seeing Scott's faint smile, I knew he was up to something. Catching my eye, he shook his head. I grinned in reply, and retreated further into the corner. This would either be a big anti-climax, or extremely entertaining.

With his brother's back turned, Scott moved over to Adam and put an arm across his shoulder. Scott started to whisper something to Adam, but I'm sure that from the other side, it would have looked like a kiss on the cheek. I saw my dad suddenly become a little panicky. When Chris started to turn around, Dad quickly caught his attention.

“So, Chris. What did you think of the cricket today?”

Now my dad is not usually a cricket fan. He can talk about it when he needs to, but I've never heard him start a conversation about cricket. Meanwhile, Randy's head snapped around to where Chris was standing before looking back to Scott and Adam. From where I was standing, I saw him kick Adam. “Ouch! What was that for?” Adam exclaimed, as Scott stepped away.

“What do you mean?” Randy asked, innocently, while trying to signal to Adam by tilting his head to where Chris was sitting.

“You kicked me,” Adam said, beginning to get annoyed, not picking up on the signs from Randy.

By this time, Chris had turned to see what was going on.

“I certainly did not!” Randy stated.

“Yes you did! There wasn't anyone else it could have been.”

“It's okay, Ads,” Scott interrupted. “I'll make it better.”

He then stepped back up to Adam, leant over and kissed him on the cheek.

Randy's jaw fell to the floor again. Adam went a bright red, and Mum dropped her cup onto the kitchen bench. Dad stood frozen, with one hand reaching out to Chris.

Chris stood there, stunned for a moment, before he turned on Scott.

“You bastard!” he yelled, and then went as red as Adam. Turning back to my mum and dad, he apologised, “Sorry, I didn't mean to swear. I'll just take my idiot brother home now.”

Scott and I couldn't help ourselves. We doubled over with laughter. Part of it was hysteria, and part of it was just a release of emotion after a stressful evening, but regardless, we just couldn't stop laughing.

Glaring at the two of us, Chris asked, “So does this mean that you finally told them?”

Still laughing, Scott said, “No.” When Chris looked confused, he added, “I let Adam tell them.”

Turning his back on the two of us in disgust, Chris spoke to my dad, “Just to make sure these clowns don’t try to confuse us again, will you tell me what he’s told you?”

Dad looked thoughtfully at Chris, but didn’t answer until he saw Scott wave at him to indicate that it was okay.

“Scott’s actually correct. He hasn’t told us anything. Instead, Adam introduced him as his boyfriend.”

Chris pumped his fist. “Yes!”

“And what do you know?” Dad asked, politely.

“I found out a few weeks ago that Scott’s gay. Since we found out about Adam, I’ve been hassling Scott to tell Adam, but he’s been too scared. To the best of my knowledge, no one else knows,” Chris answered. Frowning at where Scott and I were slowly recovering from our laughing fit, he added, “Though if he tries this again, I just might tell everyone, so I don’t have to go through it again.”

Scott sobered up instantly. “No!” he exclaimed, his terror obvious.

Chris smiled, “Just kidding, Scotty boy. I wouldn’t do that to you.”

“So, where to from here?” Dad asked.

Everyone fell silent as we just looked at each other. What was the next step? Adam, through no real fault of his, was well and truly out. Scott, on the other hand, was well and truly still in the closet. How were they going to manage a relationship like that?

“Break,” I piped up, “I think I’m going to need lots of tutoring in Computer Studies. Do you think you can manage to get here most nights? Oh, and with the finals coming up, you’ll probably need to be here on weekends for basketball practice. What do think?”

Seeming hopeful, he looked at Chris. Seeing him smile, Scott turned back to me. “Sure thing, Stick!”

“Chris, what are your parents going to say if Scott is over here all the time?” Mum asked.

Chris looked thoughtfully at me. “David’s come up with some pretty good reasons for Scott to be here, at least for the next few weeks. If we still need excuses after that, we’ll think again. But until then it should be fine.”

“We’ll need to decide what to do about B1 and B2. They’re over here a lot,” Randy commented. Smiling at Scott, he added, “Given how they handled Ads, they should be cool with you too, Break.”

Scott looked nervous. “I’d prefer that they didn’t find out, at least for a while.”

“I understand, Break, but the more people to run interference, the easier it’ll be for you,” I said. When he looked blankly at me, I explained, “The more people there are hanging around Adam, the less chance there is that someone will notice that you’re always with him. As long as you can trust them, you’ll get more time with Adam without stress. Private time will have to wait until you’re here, but you can’t spend all your time lip-locked with him, anyway.”

He smiled at Adam. “Oh, I don’t know. Sounds like a good idea to me!” Turning back to me, he continued, “But I understand what you’re saying. Just give me some time to think about it?”

Adam broke in, looking puzzled, “David, why are you being so nice to Scott when you’ve been such a bastard to me?”

Glancing around, I found myself the centre of everyone’s attention. Scott gave me a small smile of encouragement, and with that I turned back to face Adam.

“We got off to a really bad start on Friday night, Adam, and I apologise again for that. Then Randy got hurt, and I blamed you. I know now that wasn’t fair, but that’s what I did. It’s taken me awhile, but I’ve finally realised that my problems with you are not really with you being gay. The problems of the last few days have been because somehow you’ve been messing up my relationships with Liz and Randy.” Before he could respond, I raised a hand. “Yes, I know that’s not your fault either, but I blamed you anyway. After having long talks with Michael today, and Gazza tonight, I’ve come to realise that. That’s why I barged into the room earlier tonight. I was going to tell you this.”

Looking over at Scott, I smiled. Brian was right. Scott and Adam as a couple were easier to handle than Adam by himself. My worries about Randy seemed to diminish.

Turning back to Adam, I said, “I’ll admit it was a shock to find out about Break, but I’m getting over that now. B2 said it would be easier if you had a boyfriend, and strangely, it does seem easier. So, I’m trying to make sure I don’t make the same mistakes with Break that I did with you. Does that make sense to you?”

Adam stared at me for a long time. Everyone seemed to be holding their breath, waiting for his response. Still silent, he stood up and walked over to look out the kitchen window. The moonlight gave a soft glow to the countryside. Knowing from experience how restful it could be just gazing out, I waited.

“Okay,” he finally said in a soft voice. “You still have no idea what you did to me on Friday, and that’s going to take a long time to get over, but I’m willing to give you another chance.” Turning back, he stared at me with narrowed eyes. “I still can’t call you a friend. You’ve got a lot to prove before we can get back to that,” he added, firmly.

“Fair enough,” I replied, walking forward. “The ball's now in my court to prove my words with actions.”

I held out my hand to him. As I waited anxiously, he just looked at it. Finally, he reached out, nodding his head.

We shook hands.

Lying in bed that night, I thought about the days ahead. Adam and Scott still have a long way to go before they can settle down and just be a couple. Even if there weren’t outside pressures on them, they’re just starting out. I crossed my fingers for them as I hoped they will be happy together. We still didn't know how Scott's parents would react to the news, but with Chris on Break's side, I'm sure sanity will reign.

School was a big unknown. There were people like Ian who had come out of nowhere to support Adam, but others like Luke who were looking to make trouble. Today had just been the opening act. I was sure that there was a lot more trouble to come before Adam and Scott would be accepted at school. I hoped that the rumours about Randy would die quickly, but the next few days could be rough for him.

I wondered what was happening with Aiden. The logical place for him to be going to school now was the same public school as B1 and B2, but I wouldn't put it past Mr. Trent to send him somewhere further away. I'm sure the twins will let us know if he shows up there. Until then, there’s nothing we can do. I made a note to myself to try to find out when the trial will be. If Aiden's dad is put away, maybe Aiden can come back to school with us.

I suddenly remembered that my parents didn't have the guardianship papers signed. Did this mean that Adam could be leaving us at any time? Surely he couldn't be forced back to where his dad could have another go at him? I sighed as I realised that there were too many things I didn't know. Until something changes, I’ll just have to assume that Adam is staying.

Finally, I let my thoughts drift to Liz. She had told me that I had to look after Adam. I'm starting to do that now. Does this mean I have a chance of winning her back? Or have I burnt that bridge down? Should I try to talk to her tomorrow, or should I wait until she can see that I’m helping Adam?

One step at a time. While I want to get back with Liz so badly that it hurts, I have to mend my fences with Adam first. He’s family now. I have to prove I’m a friend, as well.

My last thought as I drifted off to sleep was that there are some interesting times ahead for all of us.