New Brother - 11. Chapter 11

As we waited for the bus to take us to school on Tuesday morning, I watched Randy and Adam chatting. Even though his black eyes and swollen nose were not as prominent as they had been on Sunday, my brother still looked grotesque. Despite that, he exuded a cheerfulness that ran counter to his appearance.

Adam was obviously nervous. Each time he glanced in my direction I gave him a smile of encouragement, but I could tell he still didn’t know if he could trust me. Considering what I’d put him through, that was understandable. I thought we’d made some progress, but given that we hadn’t been talking just twenty-four hours prior, it was too much to expect that our immediate history would be forgotten so soon.

It was going to be Adam’s real first day as an “out” student at school. The previous day had just been the warm-up – the introduction to the main event. He was nervous, but so was I. I think I kept it off my face, but waves of terror kept sweeping through me as I thought about all the things that could go wrong. Randy was the only one who didn’t seem to be concerned.

As the bus arrived, we picked up our school bags and prepared to board. Hesitating, I turned to Adam.

“Do you want to sit anywhere in particular?” I asked.

He started biting his lower lip as he thought about the options. Setting his mouth into a firm line, he nodded his head, as if to himself.

“Somewhere in the middle; I’m not going to hide,” he stated firmly. He then ruined his appearance of confidence by looking for reassurance from my brother and me. Naturally, we both gave him grins in return. It seemed a good choice. The front is where it’s safest, as it’s near the driver. The back is where you go to hide or to get up to mischief.

As the bus doors opened, I entered first. Taking in the scene at a glance, I saw the usual set of students, all of them staring at us. Somehow, I doubted it was because of the way Randy looked.

Moving down the aisle, I came to the where a year 12 student, the only older kid on the bus, was slouched in the middle of a seat. Though he’s been on the same bus as us for as long as I can remember, I didn’t know his name. With a few exceptions, most students don’t chat outside their own class. It’s only when there are outside interests, like our basketball team, or Ian’s concern for Adam, that communication starts to flow across the years.

The guy didn’t look hostile; it was more the stare you’d give an interesting and unusual bug. I wasn’t sure if I was being brave or if it was just bravado, but I decided to make a stand.

“Is this seat taken?” I asked him politely.

Surprised, he glanced around at all the empty seats around us, before looking back at me.

“No,” he said, dragging the word out, as if to ask me what it was I trying to do.

“Good,” I said, and started to sit next to him. He quickly moved over to the window to give me room. Randy and Adam took the seat on the other side of the aisle, with Randy by the window.

As the bus pulled out, I heard Randy call out to the other kids at the back of the bus.

“Hi, guys! How’s it going?”

Twisting around, I saw the two students exchange a glance before giving Randy a nervous wave. It was obvious that they didn’t know what to say. I saw Randy frown slightly before he turned back towards the front. Those kids’ reaction wasn’t what he’d expected. Adam had tried to tell him that things would be different because of the rumours, but I don’t think Randy had taken the advice to heart. It looked like he was starting to understand how much things had changed.

Turning to the guy next to me, I held out a hand and said, “Hi, I’m David, though most people call me Stick.”

He cautiously shook my hand. “Harrison.”

“Hi, Harrison!” I said cheerfully, trying to put him at ease. “You’ve obviously heard some rumours, so why don’t you just ask me for the truth? That way you’ll know what’s going on before anyone else.”

He gave me an unreadable look. I could sense he was trying to edge away from me. If it hadn’t been for the seriousness of what I was trying to do, I would’ve laughed. He out-weighs me by a huge amount, yet he seemed scared of me.

“Are you trying to come on to me?” he asked tentatively.

“Okay, rumour number one,” I sighed. “No, I’m not gay. I’m straight. My friend, Adam, however, is gay. He’s been kicked out of his home because of it, so he’s staying with my brother and me.”

I could see curiosity warring with his instinct to mind his own business.

“Why are you telling me this?” he eventually asked.

Being honest with myself, I realised that I really didn’t know the answer to that one. I hadn’t intended to force a conversation with him when I had entered the bus, but some of Adam’s take-me-as-I-am attitude must have rubbed off on me. Rather than wait for the battle to come to us, I had elected to get in the first blow.

“Because you’ve obviously heard something, and I wanted to make sure it was the right story. Adam is going to have a hard time today. If I can make his life easier by getting the true story out, then that’s what I’m going to do.”

“You seem pretty relaxed about it,” Harrison commented neutrally.

I gave a short laugh. “I’ve been anything but relaxed. I had a really bad weekend over this issue, but I think I can understand Adam better now. I wouldn’t wish what I’ve gone through on anyone.”

He looked at me, obviously puzzled. He opened his mouth but then slammed it shut. He then effectively terminated the conversation by turning away.

I thought of trying to explain my last comment, but I didn’t think I could. After thinking about it, I just gave up. Harrison had been told the true story and I hoped he’d pass it on.

“Thanks, David,” Adam muttered from across the aisle.

When I turned my head to look at him, he gave me a small nod of appreciation. His expression was still one of resolution, but I could tell that was because he was still trying to psych himself up for the day ahead. His eyes glazed over as he returned to looking to the front of the bus. His mind was clearly not focused on the world around him.

If I were a psychology or sociology student, observing the range of behaviours as the other students boarded the bus would’ve been interesting. As it was, I was only interested in those who reacted negatively or strangely. I ignored the ones who seemed just curious or indifferent.

Trying to figure out the emotional responses of people I’m not familiar with is fraught with peril, but I was reasonably sure that there were only three students – two girls who got on together and a guy who got on a bit later – who gave overtly hostile glares at Adam. Those three were older students. There were a couple of younger kids who could only be described as scared, which was understandable if they thought that Adam was going to jump them. I hoped that over time they would realise that he’s not like that, remembering that that had been one of my concerns initially, too.

A number of people made disparaging remarks to each other as they passed us, but they didn’t direct them at Adam; they were all about poofs or queers in general. I was going to say something to the first pair of guys who said something like that, but Adam caught my eye and shook his head.

More disturbing was the reaction of a couple of Randy’s classmates. To his cheerful “Hi” they gave a curt, almost-rude response, and quickly moved on to the back of the bus. He twisted to watch them disappear, then turned back towards the front. He hadn’t expected that and was clearly perplexed. I found it more worrying than puzzling. The rumour mill had spread Aiden’s dad’s comment about Randy being Adam’s boyfriend and a lot of people seemed to have taken it to heart. In hindsight, Adam and Randy’s sitting together in the bus hadn’t been a smart move.

Rick’s reaction was encouraging, though. He made a point of saying hello to both Randy and Adam. He said that he hoped Randy would be okay for the basketball finals, as it wouldn’t be the same for them to beat us if he wasn’t there. Randy quickly retorted that he’d be ready, and it wouldn’t be us that would be losing. It looked like Rick was at least one person who had decided that things hadn’t changed.

I decided that if the people on the bus were indicative of the rest of the school, only a small minority of the student body would be hostile to Adam. I knew we’d still need to watch out for the arseholes, but I hoped the school policies on bullying and aggression would keep most of them under control. There would probably be a large group who would think of Adam as being fair game for teasing and abuse, but I thought they wouldn’t go out of their way to make trouble. The majority would just ignore him, as they’ve always done.

I was feeling a sense of mild optimism when we exited the bus. There was going to be trouble, that was obvious, but I didn’t think it would be a calamity. As long as enough people supported Adam, I thought things should be okay.

Glancing around the schoolyard, I felt my hands start to shake and my breath go short. I saw Liz talking to some of her girlfriends. I wondered if it was too early to tell her that I’d started looking out for Adam. That was what she had wanted me to do, and the issue we had broken up over.

I was vaguely aware of Randy and Adam saying something to me, but I wasn’t listening. I only had one thing in my sight and mind. Dragging myself reluctantly forward, I started to walk towards Liz. Trying to mentally prepare what I was going to say, all I could come up with was a lame “I’m sorry.”

Before I could reach her, another figure appeared in front of me, as if by magic.

“Where the hell do you think you’re going?” asked Fiona Britton, disgust dripping from every word.

“I need to speak to Liz,” I replied simply. Fiona was not the person I had to speak to.

As I tried to step around her, she moved to intercept me.

“Well, she doesn’t need to speak to you,” Fiona spat at me. As I flinched at her tone, she added, “Don’t you think you’ve done enough already? Keep away from her and she’ll be happy, okay?”

I swayed on my feet as I tried to absorb what she was saying, wondering if I was too late.

Fiona stuck her face in front of mine, leaving only inches between us. “Okay?” she repeated forcibly.

“Okay,” I sighed. With my shoulders slumping and my head hanging, I slunk away. Fiona had delivered the message that Liz didn’t want me. My ex-girlfriend clearly hated me so much that she couldn’t even let me speak to her. I would have to find time to rebuild my life without Liz, but I wasn’t in the mood to start just then.

Lifting my head, I scanned around for Adam. Even if Liz and I were finished, I was going to honour her last request of me. It was the right thing to do, anyway.

I spotted Adam talking with a couple of girls. Randy had disappeared, probably to find his friends. Wandering over, I forced my depression into a corner of my mind. I needed to do one thing at a time. I would sort myself out over Liz later.

As I approached, I recognised Maise and Helen, the two girls who had accosted Adam in our last history class. I thought Adam might need rescuing again.

“Hi, David,” Adam said cheerfully as I joined them. Unlike his previous encounter with them, he didn’t seem stressed by the girls.

“G’day, Helen, Maise. Looking forward to another dreary day of having facts pounded into our heads?” I asked, forcing myself to appear happy to see them. Adam didn’t seem to need help, but a change of topic wouldn’t have hurt, anyway.

“Oh, hi, David,” Helen said with a noticeable lack of enthusiasm. “We were just asking Adam about his plans for the weekend.”

“I was telling them that I’m going to be busy this weekend, but I thanked them for the offer to go out,” Adam explained to me. Turning back to girls, he continued, “Perhaps sometime over Easter? I’m a little new to this, but maybe you can suggest somewhere we could all go to check out some cute guys? I’m looking forward to being able to really look at boys without worrying if anyone is going to spot me. Who knows? I might find myself a boyfriend!”

I rocked back at that, and the two girls were clearly shocked as well. This was just so different to the Adam of the day before, I couldn’t believe it. It was as if he had taken some mood-altering drugs. Nothing else seemed to explain the sudden change. I’ve heard stories about how gays will go for anything in pants, but I hadn’t expected Adam to be like that. It was less than a day since he’d gotten himself a boyfriend, and he was already talking about looking around for someone else.

“Maybe some other time, then,” Maise said quickly. After sharing a glance with Helen, she added, “We have to get going. We’ll see you around, Adam. You too, Stick.”

Adam kept a straight face until the girls had disappeared into the mob of students waiting to start school. He then broke out in a huge grin. “That was fun. I think they honestly believed that I wanted to go out looking at guys with them!”

“What was all that about?” I asked, perplexed. “Yesterday you were like a frightened rabbit around them.”

Adam looked around quickly to make sure we wouldn’t be overheard. Even so, he leant forward and whispered, “Yesterday, I didn’t have a boyfriend. Knowing Scott is there for me makes all the difference. I have that much more confidence because of him.”

Pausing, he straightened up and gave me a critical look.

“You and Giant have also helped,” he added in a normal voice. “And your parents, and Chris. I have people pulling for me. I know it wasn’t the case, but yesterday I felt alone. Today, I don’t.”

It was that simple. Adam probably didn’t realise it, but he had just delivered a massive blow to my emotional solar plexus. After all the pain I had put him through on the past Friday night, on Monday I had abandoned him again. At the time, I had thought I had reason to, but I really hadn’t. It would’ve been different if Randy had been at school, instead of being kept home, but Adam was right. He had been left alone. Alone and vulnerable.

Guilt ran through me as I contemplated what I done. Dad had made sure Randy and I had understood the danger that Adam had been in while he was homeless. Because of my actions and words, I had pushed Adam further along the path of depression. Liz had told me to help Adam, and all I’d done was drive him closer to suicide.

“Ads, wait up?”

As one, we turned to see Gary jogging up to join us.

“Hi, Gazza,” Adam said cautiously. I could sense that he was ready to fight or flee if things didn’t go well.

“I just wanted to say hi, and to let you know that I’ll be around if you need me,” Gary stated, not taking his eyes off Adam.

Adam looked startled, then grinned. “Thanks, Gazza. I really appreciate it.”

“What are mates for, if not for sticking up for each other when one’s in trouble?” Gary asked rhetorically, shrugging his shoulders. Before we could say anything, he added, “Got to go. I have to see Mary before the first class.”

With that, he was gone.

Adam and I exchanged looks, before Adam gave me a wry grin.

“Fast, furious and to the point. Gary hasn’t changed!” he remarked. I could tell that adding another name to the list of supporters had further boosted his confidence.

I smiled back at him, while thinking that Gary had changed. Before the phone call I’d had with him, he had been cold on Adam. It was only after we’d chatted that he, like me, had decided that Adam is harmless; just a friend who needs some help.

The question that Gary had raised about mates was stuck in my mind. For me, the problem is always how to work out who my mates are. For all of the horror weekend, Adam had been conspicuously absent from that list. I wanted to put him back, but it was hard work. It was not only that Adam wasn’t sure he wanted to be on that list, but also things like the incident with the girls, where he acted so different to what I was used to. There was so much I didn’t understand about what “gay” meant. I knew it couldn’t be as simple as Randy had made out, or even Ian’s explanation. I knew there was more to it than just a question of the sex of the person they love. It had to make an overall difference in the way they thought about things. Hearing Adam talk about perving on other guys had unsettled me. I didn’t know how that would affect the way I dealt with him.

As we headed to our first class, I dropped back to appraise Adam with a fresh eye. He looked confident, but he wasn’t strutting. He seemed to realise there were times he could play up on his being gay, like with the two girls, and other times he had to let it slide, like at the snide remarks on the bus. I wanted to get back to being his friend, but I wasn’t sure who I’d face at any given time: the gay Adam or the pseudo-straight one?

As I entered my English class, I realised I had to make a decision. Adam was likely to take his usual place by the window in the middle. If I took a position near him, I’d probably also be close to where Liz would be sitting. I really wanted to avoid that.

“Adam,” I started hesitantly, “do you mind if I sit at the back? I’m not ready to face Liz.”

He looked at me blankly. Then, as the light dawned, his eyes opened wide.

“David, you don’t have to sit in the back, but if you want to then that’s okay.”

I was surprised at that. He was making it sound like he wanted me to confront Liz. After what she and I had said to each other, I didn’t think that would be a good idea. Fiona had made that very clear.

With a quickly expressed thank you, I retreated to the back of the room. I was attracting a few looks again, but not as many as I had expected. Most of the others in the class were concentrating their attention on Adam. He just sat there and ignored them. The half-smile on his face was causing a bit of gossip, from what I could overhear. I knew where it came from, but some of those I overheard had expected him to be a scared, quivering wreck. That half-smile was confusing them.

Liz entered a few minutes before the class was due to start. Unlike the day before, she spotted me immediately. Instead of hiding behind a book, I just stared at her. I wanted some more memories to hold onto.

She gave me a look I couldn’t translate. She was obviously trying to hold something in, but I couldn’t tell what it was; I hoped it was anger, not hatred. I didn’t think I could stand it if she started hating me.

Turning away from me, she headed over and sat down next to Adam. When she started pulling out her books, I realised that she was making a gesture of support for him. In a strange way, it made me happy. Even though Adam had been the cause of our break-up, both of us were working towards the common goal of helping him.

Adam and Liz chatted for the remaining time before the class started. He seemed genuinely happy to talk with her. I couldn’t help staring; she looked so animated and cheerful that I felt gutted. My heart sank deeper into despair as it appeared that she was over me already. It seemed clear I had no chance of regaining her affection.

When Gary arrived at the last minute, the only vacant chairs were near Adam. Without any hesitation, Gary sat down in one of them, said hello to Adam and Liz and then started to get his books out, ready for the class. He gave me one long look, but when he followed it with a flick of the eyes toward Liz, I knew he understood why I was at the back of the room.

Mr. Landsmith arrived right on time, as usual. Without pausing, he started the class and proceeded to lecture us on the things we would need to know for the following week’s exam. Taking notes, and mentally comparing them with what I knew, took my mind off my worries, at least partially. I caught the teacher giving me a strange look a couple of times, but I suppose that was because I’m normally closer to the front and more involved than I was at the moment. I just didn’t feel like drawing attention to myself by interacting as I usually do. I just wanted to stay back and let the world forget about me for a while.

At the end of the period, Liz gave Adam a quick peck on the cheek and disappeared out the door. I moved forward and joined Gary and Adam, and we left the room as a group. Gary’s next class wasn’t too far from where Adam and I were taking maths, so he was with us for most of the way there. There was one clear call of “fucking poofs,” but when I scanned the crowd I couldn’t work out who had said it.

“Ignore them,” Adam advised out of the corner of his mouth. “As long as it’s only words, it means nothing.”

I wasn’t sure. Letting too many taunts go by without a comeback would just encourage more of the same. However, it was Adam’s call. He was the one to decide which battles he wanted to wage and which ones to avoid.

Scott was waiting anxiously by the maths classroom door when Adam and I arrived. With a relieved grin, he came up to say hello.

“Hi, guys! Everything okay?” he asked casually, though Adam and I both knew how seriously he meant it.

“Everything’s fine, Break,” Adam responded cheerfully.

With that, I noticed a subtle tension leave Scott’s body. If I hadn’t been looking for it, I wouldn’t have caught it, but clearly Scott had been worried about Adam.

Finding empty seats near each other, we sat down and prepared for the class. I thought about asking Adam to help me with my maths homework that night, even though he isn’t the most brilliant student around. Of course, almost everyone in the class is better than me. I just have trouble thinking the way maths requires. We had an exam coming up on trigonometry, but I still was getting my sines and cosines around the wrong way, let alone the perversions I could make tangents do. My state of mind wasn’t helping either.

I was pleasantly surprised when Peter Papadopolous came in and said hello to me. Given that he had berated me for not sticking up for Adam in front of Luke Williams, I was intrigued as to why he did it. All I could think of was that Scott must have had a chat with Peter after that encounter. Either that or someone had told him that Adam and I seemed to have patched up our differences. He also nodded to Adam, but didn’t say anything. It wasn’t the best response, but it showed a degree of acceptance that I hoped the other students would pick up on. A neutral indifference is a vast improvement over even mild distaste, let alone outright hostility.

I managed to concentrate during the lesson and was beginning to think that I might have a chance with the exam the next week, when the PA system burst to life.

“Adam Kennedy to the office. Can Adam Kennedy please come to the office immediately.”

Everyone turned to stare at him. I heard a couple of people behind me snicker, as if hoping Adam was in trouble. What surprised me most, though, was seeing a huge grin appear on Adam’s face as he rose to his feet. A quick glance around showed I wasn’t the only one startled. I saw several whispered conversations that almost universally ended with someone shrugging their shoulders. No one seemed to know why Adam appeared so glad to be called to the school office. Even Scott looked worried.

“May I be excused?” Adam asked politely, still smiling happily.

With a wave of his hand, Mr. Irving dismissed Adam. He was obviously disgruntled at the disruption to his class, but there was nothing he could do about it except scowl at Adam’s retreating back.

A wave of muttering spread across the room, only to die into sudden silence as the sharp clap of a long, wooden ruler striking the top of the teacher’s desk stopped all conversation.

“If you insist on chatting instead of listening to what you need to know for next week’s exam, then I’ll be happy to start the test now,” Mr. Irving said menacingly. Everyone knew that was not an idle threat. Two years ago he had carried out that promise, to the chagrin of one of the year 11 classes. None of those students are still at the school, but having an entire class fail a test because they weren’t given enough time to finish is not something that students forget quickly. It was lucky for that class that it was only an internal test. Some kids doubted he’d have been allowed to get away with it if it had been an externally-set exam.

Despite that, Scott and I exchanged looks. With a raise of his eyebrows, he silently asked if I knew what was going on. By shrugging my shoulders I told him I had no idea.

The rest of the lesson dragged on. My concentration had been shattered by Adam’s departure and I couldn’t regain it. By the end of the lesson, Adam had still not returned.

As I rose to my feet, Scott and Peter joined me.

“Any ideas on what’s happened to Adam?” Peter asked me. He was curious, but I could detect a touch of concern in his voice as well.

“Not a clue,” I responded with a shrug. “All I can say is that he seemed totally happy to be called out of the class.”

“It was as if he was expecting it,” Scott added in a distracted tone, as he let his eyes drift in the direction of the school office.

“Yeah, and that it was good news,” Peter said, plainly perplexed. “Do you mind if I stick around with you guys for a bit at lunchtime? I hate having to wait to find out what’s going on, and I think Adam will seek you out as soon as he’s free.”

I laughed, though my heart wasn’t really in it. “I have never, in all these years, picked you as a gossip, Peter.”

He shrugged before giving me a sheepish grin. “Different circles, Stick.”

As we turned to leave the room I noticed Andrew Driver, another classmate, hovering nearby. I don’t think I’d said more than two words to him all year, so I stared at him quizzically.

“David,” he said, making my name sound incredibly formal, “Ian said to say he’ll catch up with you near the end of lunch by the outside basketball courts. He’s got a few things he has to do first.”

I just stared at him as I tried to work out what the fuck was he talking about.

“Ian said you wanted to talk to him today. Is that right?” he asked nervously. His eyes started to dart between the three of us, as if trying to keep an eye out for trouble.

“Yeah,” I said slowly, “But how did you know that?”

Relieved, he grinned. “Ian’s my cousin. When I heard what Adam had said at the end of the maths class yesterday, I went and told Ian straight away. I knew he’d be interested.”

I was still trying to put all of that together when Scott piped up.

“So, you’re the one we have to thank for Ian’s fortuitous arrival yesterday,” he remarked. “Thanks, Andrew, it was very much appreciated!”

Andrew blushed a bit and turned his head away slightly. “It was nothing,” he muttered, before spinning around abruptly and heading out the door.

“He’s always been so quiet,” Peter stated, as if talking to himself. “I never knew he’s Ian Ashton’s cousin.”

I don’t know how he could’ve known. There’s absolutely no physical resemblance between them. Ian is a huge, hulking footballer. Andrew is a short, weedy intellectual. About the only thing they have in common is the colour of their hair.

As the three of us strolled to our lockers to dump our excess books, I noticed a few odd looks, but I didn’t hear any comments. The rumour that I was gay seemed to be dying. Either that or Peter’s presence forced a silence on those who would have otherwise said something. There’s a certain advantage in having one of the more popular students walking with you.

My locker was the last one we visited. As we turned the corner to get to it, I was startled to see Michael O’Conner leaning against the wall nearby.

“Hi, Stick,” he said, straightening up and sticking out a hand in greeting. “I heard the announcement for Adam, and I thought I’d come to find out what’s going on.”

Grasping his hand, I looked carefully at his face. It was as if he had a mask on; there was an expression of politeness there, but all other emotions were hidden away.

“Sorry, Mike. We have no ideas what it’s about. Adam never came back to the class,” I told him.

He frowned as he looked in the direction of the school office, as if he could see through the buildings to what was going on.

“That’s almost an hour ago,” he said slowly.

“Tell us about it,” Peter injected. “I’m dying to know what’s going on as well.”

We wandered out to take up positions on the benches by the basketball courts. Adam knows that’s one of our favourite places for lunch, so it was the best place to wait for him.

Scott was the first one to spot him, before we had gotten to the benches.

“There he is!” he exclaimed, jumping to his feet and pointing.

We all saw Adam ambling towards us. He looked distracted, and didn’t even flinch when an older student went out of his way to bump him with his shoulder.

“Watch where you’re going, you fucking faggot!”

Adam just waved a hand, without even looking at the guy. “Sorry,” he said, as if on automatic.

The other guy started to growl something, but then spotted Scott, Peter, Michael and me approaching. With a wordless snarl, he turned and stormed off. I slowed as I tried to memorise the face. I’d seen him around the schoolyard before, but I didn’t know his name. Given the way he deliberately ran into Adam, I knew I needed to correct that. I had a hunch that we, or at least Adam, would be seeing more of him.

“Ads! What were you called into the office about?” Scott asked, concerned.

Adam just smiled at him, before turning to me.

“David, your mum said to say hi.”

“What was my mum doing here?” I asked, surprised at the sudden topic change.

As we walked on towards the seats by the outside courts, Adam replied in a contented, if distracted, tone, “She brought my mum to the school to see me. Mum wouldn’t sign the papers until she’d spoken to me in person.”

“What papers?” Peter asked quickly, before anyone else could say anything.

“Guardianship papers, so my parents can legally look after Adam,” I remarked absently, as I tried to work out what was going on. “So that’s why your mum didn’t sign them yesterday?”

“Yep,” Adam said cheerfully. I could tell he was still on a high from seeing his mum for what I suddenly realised was the first time in week. He acted as if he should be walking about a foot off the ground.

“We had a good private chat in the principal’s office, and then she signed the papers in front of Mr. Pitt. The school has a copy, too.” He gave me a grin before adding, “It’s official. I’m now your brother, David.”

“That’s all I need,” I groused. “Another younger brother.”

I instantly regretted my attempt at humour, as Adam started to scowl. “Only joking!” I quickly added with a grin. I was too slow, though, because Adam still gave me a hard look before turning to the others. Yet again, my big mouth had done me a disservice; Adam’s happy mood had disappeared.

“So, your mum is cool with you?” Scott asked.

“Yeah, she is,” Adam replied with a grin to his boyfriend. I made a mental note to speak to him privately later. It may have been only because I knew, but I thought the smile he gave Scott showed a lot more affection than is safe for a guy to give another guy, especially when the smiler is gay.

“What about your dad? He’s gone off his nut, hasn’t he?” Scott queried.

“Mum thinks so. She’s really worried about him. She’s organising for Kelly to move out, just in case,” Adam said, clearly worried.

When we arrived at the seats, Adam remained standing while Scott, Michael and I sat down. Peter just leant against the tree that was there.

“Why doesn’t she just leave him?” Peter asked.

Adam stared at him and then turned to look away into the distance.

“ ‘For richer, for poorer; for better, for worse; in sickness and in health; until death do us part,’ ” he quoted in a distant tone.

“What was that all about?” I asked.

He turned to me and gave me a half-smile. “That’s what Mum replied when I asked her the same question,” he answered quietly but firmly. “She thinks he’s sick and he needs help. She won’t abandon him just when he needs her. If she was forced to, she said she’d pick me over him, but only if forced. Until then, she’s willing to let me go now, so she can have both of us in the future. That’s why she wanted to see me before she’d sign those papers.”

There was silence at that. As Adam turned away, lost in his thoughts, the rest of us exchanged amazed looks. Adam’s mum was giving him away in the hope that father and son could eventually be reconciled. Because it was being done with love, Adam didn’t feel betrayed. If anything, he was ecstatic.

After a couple of minutes, Adam lifted a hand and wiped it across his face. As he turned back to face us, we could all see where he’d just wiped away some tears. The smile on his face made it clear that those had been tears of joy.

Standing up, I turned and looked over at the others. It suddenly struck me that I didn’t understand why Michael was there. Peter had been up-front about simply being curious, though there may have been more to it than that. He was clearly about to head off, as he was pulling himself away from the tree he had been leaning against, and was picking up his bag. Michael, though, had originally expressed concern about knowing what was going on, but even though he’d just learnt what had happened and why, he was showing no signs that he was going to move. He had also gone out of his way to wait by my locker.

“Okay, everyone. I’ve got to go. I’ll see you all around, later. Good luck, Adam, with everything,” Peter said, before striding off.

Once Peter was gone, I decided to take this chance to try to find out what was making Michael tick.

“Mike,” I asked, “why are you hanging around with us? Not that I mind,” I added quickly, “but you never have before.”

He looked at me, poker-faced, before turning to stare across the school grounds. As he did, I could see the mask drop away from his face and an expression of horror appear.

“My dad,” he whispered, before shuddering. “He brought home some photos from work last night. He told me that the pictures showed the results of gay bashing.”

Ignoring me, Michael turned around to look at Adam. Michael probably didn’t see it, but Scott was staring at him open-mouthed. I could feel the apprehension for what he was about to hear radiating from Break.

“He never told me to hang around with you, Adam, but I know what he wants me to do. He showed me those photos so I would know what can happen if no one stands up for you. My dad has told me that personally he can’t stand most of the gays he’s met. He thinks they act too much like girls. But he’s told me that they’re just the obvious gays, and no one, absolutely no one, deserves what was done to the guys in those pictures.”

With another shudder running through his body, he dropped his eyes to the ground.

“One set of photos were taken from the morgue,” he finished in a tortured whisper.

Adam and Scott exchanged glances. The fear they were feeling was palpable. Any chance of Scott coming out of the closet in the near future had just taken a huge dive.

I had just gone numb. It didn’t seem real to me, what Michael was saying. In my head, I could hear his words, but the implications just weren’t coming through. He was talking as if Adam was in danger of being badly hurt, or even killed!

Eyes still downcast, Michael continued, “That’s why I’m here. Dad’s always taught me about right and wrong, and I want him to be proud of me.” Looking up at Adam, he added, “He’s told me that you can’t help being who you are. You’re the way God intended you to be. I don’t have to like you, though I do think you’re an okay sort of guy, but he says everyone should step in to stop injustice. Those that stand by and let it happen are as bad as those who do it.”

Stepping forward, I put a hand on Michael’s shoulder. As he turned to look at me, the mask he first wore was coming back, hiding his emotions behind a wall, again.

“Thanks, Michael. It’s really appreciated,” I said. “I’ll have to check with my mum, but would you and your family like to come around to our place one weekend? I think it would be good for us to all get together, sometime.”

Michael gave me a small smile. “Thanks, Stick. I’d like that. I’ll ask my dad tonight.”

For a couple of minutes, no one knew what to say. First, Adam had given us his good news, putting everyone on a high. Then, Michael had dropped his bombshell and the atmosphere had chilled instantly. My mind was racing in circles, trying to find something to focus on.

As I let my gaze wander aimlessly over the yard, I made eye contact with a student on the far side of the basketball courts. It was as if I had been shot by an arrow of hatred. The emotions that came through, even from that distance, were strong and dark. That guy was watching us with what appeared to be a deep and lasting hate.

As the guy broke eye contact and started to walk away, I recognised him as the person who’d bumped into Adam on our way to the courts.

“Quick, guys. Anyone know who that is?” I asked, pointing. I was anxious for the others to also see the guy.

“Who?” Scott asked, as he peered in the direction I was indicating.

“The guy with the red bag. Black hair, thin. He’s heading towards the art rooms,” I described quickly.

“I see him!” Adam exclaimed.

“Do you know him?” I asked again.

“Nope,” Adam replied, shaking his head as he turned back to me, “Why?”

“He’s the guy that went out of his way to bump you as you arrived. I just saw him staring daggers at us,” I said, trying to convey the hatred I had felt radiating from the guy.

Adam shrugged. “I get bumped all the time, now. No big deal.”

I resisted the impulse to throttle him for not seeing that we need to know who’s likely to make problems for him.

“I think he’s going to cause trouble,” I said with exasperation. “We need to know who he is so we can be prepared.”

Adam sneered at me. “You think he’s going to cause trouble,” he repeated sarcastically. “Half the school could be about to harass me. What’s so special about this one guy?”

I clenched my fists to stop them from grabbing him by the throat. It was clear that I still had a long way to go before he accepted me. However, the ball was firmly in my court. I had to show him, by actions, not words, that I wanted to be his friend.

“He’s not in our year,” Michael interjected thoughtfully from where he was sitting on the bench. “I think he’s in year 11, but it could be year 12.”

“You didn’t see how he looked at us, or the way he went out of his way to bump into you before,” I tried to explain to Adam. “Call it a gut feeling, if you like, but I don’t think that was a one-off incident.”

Adam just shrugged and turned away. It was clear he didn’t think much of it. I wondered if he would have been so indifferent if someone else had been the one who had spotted the guy. He was accepting my help, but he still couldn’t bring himself to trust me.

Michael rose to his feet. “I’ll do a bit of checking around to see if I can find out who he is.”

I watched Michael leave, with a sense of relief and gratitude. Someone was taking me seriously. Until the guy did something, there wasn’t a lot more I could do, so I pushed the issue to the back of my mind.

As Michael strode off, I looked around carefully to see if we could be overheard. Seeing no one nearby, I turned to Scott. He and Adam needed to talk. Adam must have been dying to tell him about the chat with his mum.

“I’ll just be over there,” I said to Scott, pointing to the end of the basketball court. “Give me a yell if you need me to come back.” After giving him a critical look, I smiled and added, “Just keep your hands to yourself. Talking; no touching. And make sure you’re not overheard.”

Scott looked perplexed for a moment, then blushed as he realised what I meant. With a grin, I left him to have a private chat with his boyfriend. The smile fell from my face as I recalled the times I’d had private chats with my girlfriend in the schoolyard; a privilege I’d recently lost.

Forcing my mind away from happy memories that were causing so much pain, I realised I couldn’t leave Scott and Adam alone for too long, or too often. Scott wants, and probably needs, to keep on hiding. He’s going to come into some ribbing, simply for being a friend of Adam’s, but as long as enough of us run interference, no one should suspect the truth.

While I was working out what other opportunities I could create for Adam and Scott, I saw Randy, eyes downcast, shuffling slowly across the school grounds. His usual energetic walk had been replaced with a lethargy that looked unnatural on my normally happy brother. Worried about what may have happened, I strode over to intercept him.

“What’s up, Randy?” I asked, concerned. “Is there something wrong?”

He looked up at me. I was relieved to see he wasn’t distressed. I had been privately worried about what the other kids in his classes may have been saying to him; knowing there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. Instead of looking distressed, he looked puzzled, as if there was a problem he just couldn’t understand.

“Do you remember our chat the night Adam first stayed at our place?” he asked, his mind obviously not totally in the here-and-now.

I was confused. “Which chat?”

“The one about me having more confidence in my friends than you seem to have in yours,” he answered, beginning to focus on me instead of his thoughts.

“What happened? Did one of them say something to upset you?”

He shook his head. “No. I was right about that, at least to a degree. Practically all of them came up to me to say that they don’t have a problem with me being gay. It doesn’t bother them.”

I stared for a second in disbelief, before responding. “But you’re not gay!”

“I know. That’s what I told them,” Randy said, looking at me like he wanted help to understand what was going on.

“They don’t believe me.”