Knots

Chapter 6

Andy

Wheeler sat down and I started to leave the witness stand when Banta said, “I have a few more questions for this witness.” I looked at the judge and he nodded for me to return to the witness chair. I’d hoped we were going to take a break. Wheeler had managed to pull their cocks out of my ass, but that asshole Banta was up with his yellow legal pad to see if he could put it back in and fuck me hard and deep.

“I know this has to be hard for you. But you must realize that a young man could have his life ruined and it’s our duty to keep that from happening. Do you understand?”

I didn’t say anything. Wheeler started to stand and Banta said, “Withdrawn.” He paced back and forth in front of me like a tiger ready to pounce. “Have you had sex with any other boys besides the ones we’ve already discussed?”

I’d forgotten about Kyle. “Yes.”

“How old is he?”

“I think seventeen.”

“So he’s under eighteen and you had sex with him just like you did with the defendant before he was eighteen. Is that correct?”

“Yes.”

I wanted to jump over the railing that separated me from Banta and take him to the ground with a good tackle.

“Now if my count is correct, you’ve had sex with a total of five guys besides the defendant. Is that correct?”

My mind was full of confusion. Hell, I wasn’t sure how many.

“I’m not sure.”

That was about the worst thing I could have said because Banta jumped right on in. “So you’ve had sex with so many different boys, you can’t keep track?”

“No, that’s not what I meant!”

“Then tell us how many.”

“Five.”

Banta strutted like a rooster. “Do you know what they call women who sleep around like you do?”

Wheeler jumped up and looked pissed. “Your Honor, this is outrageous. This young man did not have sex with a boy until Dillon seduced him. To imply that this fifteen-year-old boy could be what the defense is referring to is way out of line.”

The judge rapped his gavel. “I agree with you. Mr. Banta, I suggest you be more cautious. This young man is fifteen and the defendant is eighteen. One is an adult and the other a minor. Treat him as such.”

For the first time, Banta no longer looked like a tiger.

Banta walked over to the defense table and talked to Dillon and the other lawyers. It seemed like a tactic to let me stew in my seat, and stew I did. It almost took more courage than I had to look at my parents again. My mother had a handkerchief to her eyes. Randy and Thomas’ parents were stunned, but they already knew their boys had been having threesomes with Dillon before all this happened. They didn’t look happy, but they didn’t look nearly as devastated as my parents and Matt’s parents. Matt’s mom turned away when I looked at her. Mr. Spence just stared at me.

Banta returned with his yellow pad in hand. “Andy, we know you must be tired and we’re almost through. I just need to finalize a couple things. You’ve had sex with five different guys. Is that correct?”

“Yes.”

“You’ve had sex with three other guys on at least one occasion and two other guys on another. Is that correct?”

“Yes.”

“Do you blame the defendant for your actions?”

I hadn’t expected that questions. Ironically, I didn’t know the answer. What if Dillon and I had sex once and he never told me he loved me? What if Dillon wasn’t having sex with other guys? He was probably having sex with Kyle too when he was fucking Randy, Thomas, and me.

“Yes, I blame the defendant for my actions.”

“Did he force you to have sex with these other boys?”

“No.”

“Then how can you blame him?”

I figured I had Banta by the balls. “He said he loved me. He said I was the only one in his life and all the time he was fucking around with other guys. It hurt and I was suicidal.” The judge let me go on with a warning about the language. I thought Banta was going to object, but he didn’t. “He hurt me like I’d never been hurt before. And then he told me we’d have to stop because he would be turning eighteen. I begged him not to stop and to stay with me. I was so happy when he said he loved me and we continued to have sex. But then it all came down around me, all of us, when we found out he was nothing but an asshole who had his own four guys to fuck.”

Banta looked at the judge. “Your Honor, would you please warn this young man about his language?”

“Son, I know you’re angry, but you need to watch your language.”

The lesson I learned that day was that it’s best to keep your answers short and your anger in check. Banta gave me a weak smile. “So you begged the defendant to continue his relationship with you after he turned eighteen. Is that correct?”

The pause was long. “Yes.”

“You said you were happy when he said he loved you and the two of you were going to continue in your relationship. Is that correct?”

“Yes.”

“Is it possible that the defendant, like your friend, Matt, continued in the relationship with you because he did love you and didn’t want to hurt you?”

Wheeler objected. “The witness has no way of knowing why the defendant did what he did.”

“Overruled. The witness was asked if it was a possibility, not if he knew for sure.”

Banta got close to me. “Let me ask again. Is it possible Dillon did love you and didn’t want to hurt you?”

“Yes, it’s possible, but…”

“Just answer the question.”

Now he didn’t want me to rant and explain the situation. He was a smart son-of-a-bitch.

Banta walked over to the defense table and threw his tablet on the table. “No further questions.”

The judge rapped his gavel. “I think it’s time we take a break. I advise all the parties that are involved not to talk to the witnesses until the end of the day.” He turned to me. “The bailiff will escort you to a small lunchroom where you can have lunch.” I glanced at my parents, who gave me a quick sad look as they turned and walked out the door. In a way, they probably blamed themselves. Things between them and me were so much better now and maybe none of this would have happened if it had always been like that. But Matt had a great relationship with his parents and look at him. He was in the same pot of shit as me. The difference was our motives. His were good. Mine were questionable.

I wanted to talk to Matt so badly. But they had him locked away in the court library. It was then I began to think they might call him back to the stand.

Matt

I was sitting in the court library thinking about the hot sex Thomas and I had when there was a rap on the library door. The bailiff opened the door and stuck his head in. “You’re wanted in court.”

“What for?”

“The defense wants to ask you a few more questions.”

Scared isn’t the word. What do you call it when you realize that in the next few minutes your whole life is going to change?

The bailiff led me up the stairs to the wide hallway with high ceilings and courtrooms on each side. A few people were milling around, but there wasn’t any sign of my parents or anyone I knew. Shit, I thought.

The bailiff opened the door and escorted me up to the swinging wood gates that separated the visitor gallery from the trial area. The judge nodded at me as he pointed to the witness stand. “Please take a seat.”

Some guy I didn’t recognize from the first time stood and introduced himself as Keith Leonard.

I squirmed in the witness chair before they even had a chance to ask me the first question.

“You’ve already been sworn to tell the truth and we trust that everything you say in court today will be the truth. Is that correct?”

Fuck no, is what came to my mind. Talk about being blindsided. I had no idea what Andy had testified to earlier, and here I was on the stand again.

Leonard cleared his throat. “In your earlier testimony you said that Dillon raped you and that it was not consensual. Is that correct?”

“Yes.”

“So if I understand your testimony correctly, you did not want to have sex with another guy. Is that right?”

“Yes.”

I folded my hands, looked down at my fingers, and then at my parents. Their faces showed every emotion you could think of from anger to love to disappointment. It was then I knew the shit had hit the fan.

“Have you ever had sex with another boy other than Dillon Burke?”

Damn, what the hell had gone on while I was relaxing in the library? Nothing came out of my mouth.

Leonard looked at his notes for some reason. He already knew what the question was, but it had the desired effect. It scared the shit out of me.

“Did you hear the question?”

“Yes.”

I could answer that one.

“Let me repeat. Have you ever had sex with a boy other than Dillon Burke?”

Again, I didn’t respond. Leonard looked at the judge.

The judge leaned toward me. “I know this is tough son, but please answer the question.”

“The answer is yes.”

“When you say yes, are you verifying that you had sex with another boy or boys besides Dillon Burke?”

“Yes.”

Surprisingly I didn’t expect the next question.

“Have you ever had sex with more than one boy at a time?”

I looked down and then up at my mother. She was crying. My dad had his arm around her shoulders. All I could think of was KNOTS. The kind that hurt people. My dad had a look of hope on his face until I said, “Yes.”

“How many other boys?”

“Three.”

“I need to ask this question to verify Andy Gibson’s testimony. Did you have sex with Andy Gibson and the other two boys who are responsible for this fraudulent case of statutory rape against the defendant?”

Wheeler rose. “Objection, Your Honor. The defense is putting words in the witness’s mouth and his words are inflammatory.”

“Sustained.”

“Let me rephrase. Did you have sex with Andy Gibson and the other two boys who are the alleged victims in this case of statutory rape?”

“Yes.”

“Did you have sex together at the same time?”

“Yes.”

His next question flashed in my mind. Did you enjoy it?

“So you have accused the defendant of raping you and at the same time are having sex with at least three other boys. Is that correct?”

I looked down at my fingers. “Yes.” Banta was getting ready to ask his next question and I yelled, “This all happened after the rape. It has nothing to do with this other stuff.”

Banta grinned. “Other stuff, you call it. Sounds like a lot of other stuff to me.”

I stood and pointed my finger at him. “You know what I mean.”

The judge rapped his gavel. “Sit down son and calm yourself.”

It’s beyond me why people who are not your parents think they can call you son. But I guess it was better than him calling me a hedonist and sodomite, which of course I was. Life is like that though. You learn from your mistakes. I’m not sure if it was then or later, but I decided it was time to be myself again. So much in me had changed since that first night of sex with Andy. There was no way of knowing if change was possible now that I’d had a dick in my mouth and in my ass, but I was going to at least give it a try. My parents were probably going to ground me forever and that might make it a bit easier. The lies had to stop. My life needed to get back on track. But a lot of crooked track lay ahead of us and then of course, there were all the knots we were dragging up that steep hill that I dreamt about every now and then in my sleep. All of that flashed in my mind as I watched Banta smile as if he’d gotten me to do just what he wanted.

Then the asshole asked, “When was the last time you had sex with one of these boys?”

Damn, I thought. That must have been the noise we heard.

But Wheeler stood up. “Objection. This is irrelevant and personal.”

The judge glanced at Wheeler and the foursome at the defense table. “Overruled. It speaks to the witness’s character.”

That hurt. I’d always been taught that character is important. It means you can be trusted to make good decisions, show some wisdom, and not lie. They were questioning my character. Hell, I’d been questioning my character, but I’d never thought of any of what we did, from lying to my parents and sneaking off to have sex, as having anything to do with character. Like Andy used to say. “We’re just having fun.”

I’ve got to tell you, that if I’d have known it was Andy lurking outside the vacant house, I’d have lied, but I didn’t know it at the time.

Banta moved in close and then pulled back as if he were afraid of me. “Let me repeat the question. When was the last time you had sex with one of these boys?”

I glanced at my parents, who just stared at me as if I was a strange boy they didn’t know. Someone they’d just called son, like the judge. I finally answered. “Last night.”

My mom put her hand over her mouth and gasped. I figured Thomas wasn’t going to have the same respect from my parents from now on as he did the night before. But then, of course, neither was I.

Banta pulled in his horns, smiled at me, glanced at the jury, and said, “No more questions.”

Wheeler looked defeated but he slowly rose and said, “Redirect, Your Honor.”

“When was the first time you had sex with anyone male or female?”

“The night Andy found out about Dillon having sex with other guys.”

“Did you have sex with him that night?”

“Yes.”

“Why?”

“I thought he was going to kill himself and I didn’t know what else to do.”

“Do you think it was the right thing to do?”

That caught me by surprise. “I thought it was at the time, but now I realize it was the wrong thing to do. Andy was betrayed, hurt, and angry because he found out the boy he loved didn’t love him. All of us were confused. Dillon had raped me. Our lives were all tied in knots, and I gave Andy what I thought he needed without giving any thought to what I needed and how it would affect me. Maybe it’s just part of being fifteen. I should have known better.”

Wheeler gave me a comforting smile. “Did Andy ever tell you how he felt about what you did?”

“Yes. He told me I made him feel loved. He was lost and confused when it all came down. It was like he was in a burning building, the lights were out, and there were no exit signs.”

“Do you think what you did kept him from committing suicide?”

Banta threw his pen down on the defense table. “Objection. The witness is being asked to testify to something he has no way of knowing.”

“Overruled. The witness can have his own opinion.”

“I don’t know. We spent the week together and it seemed to make a difference. He wasn’t suicidal by time we made it back to school the following Monday. Maybe we could have just talked. But I’m not a qualified counselor, so I did what I did because it was the only thing I thought I could do to make life seem right to him again. I really love Andy and for me it wasn’t about sex. It was about our friendship. I love him like a brother. What else can I say?”

“Thank you, Matt. No further questions.”

The judge looked at the defense. Banta stood. “We have no further questions for the last two witnesses; they are free to go.”

Free to go. Free isn’t the word I would have used. The pain I caused my parents was the worst of it. Yeah, it was going to be bad at school, but my parents loved me and I hadn’t loved them back. I’d deceived and betrayed them. What little courage I had failed me. I should have told them about the sex instead of blindsiding them.

Andy

They kept me in the back of the courtroom for about an hour before the bailiff came and got me. “Mr. Gibson, you’re excused and are free to go.”

I almost felt the same as the day I found out about Dillon. I felt empty, and just like with Dillon, it was my own fault. At the time I wanted to blame everyone else, but I knew it was me. I could have told Matt no when he was going to give me his virginity. I didn’t because I was scared and angry and empty. I wanted him and took what he offered. I’d always wanted him. Maybe that’s why it took away the thoughts of suicide. That week with Matt was special. I was having sex with my best friend, and the guy I’d tried to seduce. Problem is, it all eventually turned to shit.

My parents were waiting for me in the hall as I stepped outside the rear of the courtroom. Mom was crying and my dad looked like a helpless failure. Guilt spread across his face. I knew it was guilt because it spread across mine too. “Where’s Matt?” I asked.

My dad pulled me in and hugged me. We’re sorry, Andy.”

They were sorry. Hell, I was sorry. “Me too.”

My dad continued to hug me and hold me tight. “I told you we should have done this kind of stuff more often.”

I began to cry. Sometimes love can do that to you. “Dad, I love you.”

My mom hugged me as soon as my dad let go. “We both love you,” she said as she let go and kissed me on the forehead. “Let’s get out of here. It’s been a rough few days for all of us.”

Matt

My parents stood and waited by the door as I left the witness stand. I moved slowly, hoping to postpone the inevitable. Mom was still crying and my dad had his arm around her shoulders. My eyes turned away and focused on Thomas and Randy’s parents because I couldn’t look at my own. They gave me an understanding smile, which is more than I could expect from my parents or the kids at school. We’d betrayed them, or at least I did.

My dad took his arm from my mom and put it around my shoulder when I got to the door. “Matt, it seems we have a lot to talk about.”

“Yeah, we do,” I said.

No one said anything when we first got outside the courtroom. No one knew what to say. Finally, I managed an, “I’m sorry. Really sorry.”

They could have said like so many parents, “Well, you should be after what you did,” but they didn’t.

“We’re sorry too,” my dad said.

I turned angry for a second. “Why should you be sorry?”

“We’re sorry because we know what lies ahead for all of us, but especially for you. It’s not going to be easy.”

My dad pulled the car keys out of his pocket. “Let’s go home.”

Home…It sounded so good when my dad first said it, but home was different now than it was six month before. My parents had a traitor in their midst. At least that’s the way I felt. Home would never mean the same again. Nor would I ever be the same person in my parents’ eyes. It had all changed. It might someday seem different, but they would never trust me again. Everything might eventually seem right, but it would only be on the surface. I remember thinking that every time they looked at me, they’d see Thomas and me having sex the night we went out for a run. They seemed so happy that night. And now they faced a son who had lied to them and betrayed their trust.

Thomas

Thomas was called to the stand right after Matt and Andy left court. They went through the usual formalities before Wheeler stood and came forward. “Thomas, did the defendant have sex with you after he was eighteen?”

“Yes.”

“How old were you when you first had sex with the defendant?”

Thomas looked down. “Thirteen.”

“How old are you now?”

“Fourteen.”

“How old was the defendant at the time?”

“Seventeen, I believe.”

“That means he was four years older than you. Is that right?”

“Yes.”

“When you first met the defendant, did you ever think he was being friendly with you because he wanted sex?”

“No.”

“Why was that?”

“He was the varsity quarterback and no one thought he was gay.”

Thomas shifted in his seat and Wheeler glanced at the defense table before looking back at Thomas. “How long did you know the defendant before you had sex with him?”

“Three or four months.”

“Did you think you were gay when you met the defendant?”

“No.”

“Do you think you are gay now?”

“I think so.”

“What do you mean ‘I think so?’”

“Uh. Uh.” Thomas looked at the judge and then the jury. “I don’t want to discuss it here in court.”

“Why is that?”

Thomas frowned. “I just don’t.”

“Let’s move on. Did you ever indicate that you wanted to have sex with the defendant?”

“No.”

“Did the defendant make the first moves, so to speak, in order to get you to have sex with him?”

Banta objected. “First moves is vague. What does the DA mean by first moves?”

“Objection sustained.”

“Name a few of the activities you and your best friend Randy did with the defendant.”

Thomas let his shoulders drop. “He took us to the park and played football with us. He showed us drills for quarterbacks and running-backs.”

“Did he ever touch you during these practices?”

“He put his arm over our shoulders and pulled us in close. Sometimes he grabbed our ass cheeks.”

“Did that bother you?”

“We were only thirteen and he was the varsity quarterback. We figured he was just being friendly. Guys sometimes pat other guys on the butt and put their arms around them.”

“Did he ever squeeze your buttocks?”

Thomas looked down at his hands and then at Wheeler’s feet. “The more we went out to practice the more he touched us. He liked to grab our buttocks, as you say, and then he would laugh it off. Sometimes he’d play around and grab our privates.”

“How did you react to that?”

“I’d tell him to get his hands off me.”

“Did he?”

“Yes.”

“Did he stop all together?”

“No, he’d do it again and then run away from us as we chased him. At first we thought it was just a game.”

“What other kinds of things did the defendant do with you?”

“He took us to the amusement park in his hot BMW convertible, took us out to eat, and gave us things.”

“What kinds of things did he give you?”

“He gave each of us, Randy and me, an mp3 player, a smart phone, and an iPad.”

“How did you react to these gifts?”

“We thought it was hot. Dillon had a lot of money and we figured he could afford it.”

“Did you ever turn any of the gifts down?”

“No.”

“Did the gifts and everything Dillon was doing with you make you feel obligated to him?”

“Yes.”

“Would you please tell the court how the defendant lured you into having sex with him?”

“Objection!” Banta yelled

“Sustained. Mr. Wheeler, please watch the words you use.”

“Yes, Your Honor.”

“Please tell the court what led to the defendant having sex with you and your best friend.”

“Like I said, we felt obligated to him and he made us feel important. We were only thirteen and he was seventeen. It made us feel important that he was interested in us. He took us to his house one afternoon and showed us some porn. At first it was sex with guys and girls. I’d never watched porn before and well, you know…”

“I do, but please tell the court.”

Thomas looked around the courtroom and then down at the floor. “I had an erection. I think Randy did too.”

“Did the defendant touch you?”

“No.”

“What happened next?”

“He clicked on his screen and there were two younger guys, close to Dillon’s age having sex.”

“How did that make you feel?”

Thomas looked at his parents and then back down at the floor. “I’d never thought of myself as gay, but seeing two guys having sex was…was…better than I expected.”

“What did the defendant do next?”

“He asked if we ever masturbated, except he didn’t use that exact word.

“Randy and I were embarrassed to tell him, but he said every boy does it and we shouldn’t be embarrassed. So we both nodded. Then he asked if Randy and I had ever masturbated together. We told him no. Then he said, ‘it’s fun to watch another guy masturbate. Do you want to try it? Randy and I looked at each other and nodded.”

Wheeler glanced at his notes. “Why did you nod?”

“Randy and I had talked about doing it together but thought it was too gay so we never did. But Dillon made it seem like it was normal. And after watching the porn, we were ready.”

“Describe what happened next.”

“Dillon took off his clothes and jumped on the bed. We were standing there gawking at well, you know what.”

“Please tell the court.”

Thomas looked at Wheeler and then down at his fumbling fingers. “His penis.”

“What did you do?”

“At first we didn’t do anything but look. Then he said, ‘Get your clothes off and get over here, we’ll have a circle jerk.’”

“Did you know what a circle jerk was?”

“I thought I did, but I didn’t. I thought we’d each masturbate our own penises but once we were on the bed naked and masturbating, Dillon told us we had to massage each other’s penises.”

“How did you react?”

“I said “no way!” But no sooner had I said it, Dillon had each of our penises in his hands.”

“How did you react?”

“Uh. Uh. I didn’t. Neither did Randy. We just let him do it until, well you know, we climaxed.”

The judge rapped his gavel. “Mr. Wheeler, I hate to stop you in the middle of this young man’s testimony, but it’s been a long day. I think it’s time to adjourn until tomorrow morning at nine-thirty.” He rapped his gavel again. “Court’s adjourned.”

Chapter Quotes

By three methods we may learn wisdom: First, by reflection, which is noblest; Second, by imitation, which is easiest; and third by experience, which is the bitterest. - Confucius

Experience is not what happens to you; it's what you do with what happens to you. - Aldous Huxley

The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails. - William Arthur Ward

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If you like this story, please write a review, click like, and follow me. Contact me at eliassctt@gmail.com I answer all emails.

I’d like to thank Lisa for taking the time to edit Knots 1, 2, & 3. As the author, I take final responsibility for all parts of the story, including any errors.

This story is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product of the author's imagination and are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons living or dead, events or locales, is purely coincidental and no slanderous intent is implied.