Life in a Northern Town - 6. Chapter 6

After dinner is done, and I have helped John with the dishes while Scott and Joe did their homework, we kids settle into the living room to watch some TV while John and Ken do some paper work. I'm not really paying attention to the TV program but rather am thinking about what happened in the past few days. It feels surreal, even in retrospect, that any of this is actually happening. That I am here in a county-run group home.

Joe is working on his lap top and Scott is completely focused on the TV set. I have a feeling Joe is writing a love letter to Randy. It is pretty funny to watch him type into his laptop, with his tongue sticking out between his teeth as he concentrates on the words on the screen. One can almost hear the wheels turning in his head.

I hear the phone ringing in the other room and John speaking before hanging up. He pokes his head around the corner a few minutes later, and taking stock of the room, looks at me and lets me know that Nick and Randy are going to stop by for a few minutes.

“Randy’s coming over?” Joe asks.

“Joe...” John says with a look of warning.

“What?” Joe asks, doing his best to appear innocent as the new fallen snow, and failing miserably, I might add. He excuses himself a few minutes later, while Scott remains oblivious on the couch. I decide I need to go brush my teeth and comb my hair before Nick gets there. Won’t do to be seen looking like some refugee. Besides I want him to like what he sees, and maybe want to kiss me again!

I go upstairs and hear the water being shut off as I top the last riser. Joe emerges from the bathroom with his hair damp, freshly combed, and cupping his hand in front of his mouth to check his breath. I break out laughing. I know it isn’t nice, but it is so funny. He looks at me with a hurt expression followed quickly by a sheepish grin.

“Go ahead, laugh, but Randy is hot!” he says with a grin.

“I need you to tell me this?” I grin back.

I pop into my room and grab my comb from the nightstand, and then head back to the bathroom to freshen up a bit. I head out and sit on the back porch, as I had the previous night, to wait for Randy and Nick. The sound of the door opening and closing alerts me to company joining me, and I am mildly surprised to see Scott.

“Hey,” he greets me. I reply in kind before he shyly asks if he could join me for a few minutes. I wave at the open portion of wooden porch next to me and Scott sits quietly for a moment before speaking.

“I know they’ll be here in a minute, so I guess I better hurry the hell up, huh?” he laughs a little to himself.

“Well,” I drawl, “I would like to see them a bit by myself, if you don’t mind.”

“Yeah, I figured. It’s just, well, Joe’s real happy right now. Happier than I remember him being since he got here, so I figure that has something to do with you. That and maybe that he is physically in proximity to Randy Proctor. I have a serious question though,” he trails off and I step up to pre-empt his question.

“No, Randy is straight, not even a little bi,” I say with a sad grin. I do feel badly for Joe. I mean, I have Nick and he is who I want, right? So I am lucky in that respect anyway. But this is awkward as hell with Joe salivating over my best friend. Now I don't know for sure if Randy is strictly one way or the other, but even if I did, it isn't my place to tell someone else.

“Well, I figured that much, Einstein,” he laughs a little. “My question is, will he let Joe down easy? Or will he be a dick? Cause Joe is about as hard to see through right now as a pane of glass!”

“Randy has never been an asshole a day in his life. As long as I have known him he has always worried about other people. I think the only thing Joe has to worry about is if he makes too much about me being here, since Randy’s dad is trying to get me out,” I said reasonably.

“Good point. No comments about you living here. Got it,” he replies, as if he is responding to a superior officer.

“Oh, and one other thing,” I say, smiling wryly. “Randy will let Joe hang around if he’ll just be cool, I think. And next time Joe has questions, tell him to come ask me himself,” I chuckle at a surprised Scott, who then joins my laughter.

“I better go before Joe thinks I am a double agent,” he says before going inside. Remarkable relationship those two have, symbiotic one could call it. I shiver in the evening air and am finally rewarded with the twin funnels of light that mark the front of Nick’s car. The engine kicks off and I walk towards the car, feeling myself blush and my nerves hopping like live wires.

“Hey, bro,” Randy greets me with the usual protective hug.

“Hi babe,” Nick says before giving me a light kiss on the lips and then a big hug. God! I am in heaven!

“Hi you guys, I’m glad to see you,” I mumble while my head is buried in Nick’s shoulder. v “Ran into one of your house mates today. Joe is it?” Randy snorts. “Had to set him straight.”

“Bet that wasn’t easy,” I grunt at him while continuing to hold Nick in a death grip.

“Guy seems to think you belong here, Adam. It pisses me off, you aren’t some fucking reject,” he says hotly. I reluctantly break my embrace and look at Randy, who looks pissed.

“Rand, it’s not what you think, really,” I say, trying not to reveal too much.

“Just 'cause he’s here doesn’t mean you are supposed to be!” he complains in a hoarse whisper, trying not to be heard by any eavesdroppers in the house.

“Rand, quit being a dick!” I grouse at him, “He hasn’t had it so good. He didn’t have some advantages I have. Like you,” I touch his shoulder and wrap my arm about Nick’s shoulders, “and Nick here. He hasn’t had the things we had, Rand. Trust me, it’s not what you think.”

“I’m sorry,” he says, toeing his sneaker into the asphalt of the parking lot. “I didn’t mean anything, really. It just pisses me off.” I lift his chin so his eyes met mine.

“I miss you too,” I smile sadly.

“How are they treating you?” Nick asks.

“John’s been…a lot different than I thought he’d be. I think he really does give a shit, to be honest. We got some clothes today. No names, but still it was all new,” I say to them. “Plus Joe and Scott have been nice, if not a little nosy about my personal life.”

“Well, as long as you’re happy...” Randy begins.

“Rand, I am not happy,” I smile at him, “I miss my best friend and my boyfriend all the time. I need these visits like I need air. But I’m okay.”

He nods at me and we begin walking towards the house, John looking out through the window as he does some phantom dishes, no doubt. I wonder if he thinks I’ll run away or something? That would be kind of wild. Hop in Nick’s car and never look back! Instead, I just walk up the back steps and through the door and into the kitchen. John turns from the sink, tea pot in hand, and greets us.

“Hi Randy, Nick,” he nods his head at each of them. “Like some tea?”

“Um, sure, thanks,” Nick replies, while Randy waves him off and says, “No, thank you.”

“Adam?” he nods at me, “want a cup?”

“Yes, please,” I reply before we sit down around the table.

“You coming back to school tomorrow?” Randy asks me.

“I think so, right John?”

“Yeah, they’ll be expecting you. Do you want to take the bus with these guys, or should I drop you off?” John asks.

“I, um, I could pick him up on the way. It’s not far out of our normal way to school anyways,” Nick says hopefully.

“Well, I’d like to say yes, but I think we need to work on structure first. Plus, there are the legalities. Like it or not, this is a placement, and one of the rules is that he can’t ride in private vehicles not operated by staff. And the only staff is my husband and me,” John says not unkindly.

“Oh,” Nick replies with a defeated look.

“Look,” John says while taking a seat with us, “It’s not usual for someone in this placement to have so many people around to support them. I don’t want to cut that off, but at the same time, I need for Mr. Adam here to make progress.

“Randy, I know your dad is setting up to seek custody of Adam.” John smiles at him. “That’s great. A loving family is the ideal environment for someone who needs stability. But, in the meantime, he lives here. I think it would be a good idea if we work together, so that when Adam goes before the judge we can say how much progress he has made. And, that he is ready for a step down in care, instead of us fighting and him maybe getting in trouble somewhere along the way.

“Like getting into your car, Nick, and maybe you get pulled over 'cause your taillight is out. He’s not supposed to be there, so please help him follow the rules. What do you say?” John asks as the teapot starts to whistle. While he gets up to attend to that Randy eyes him until he returns with two steaming cups of brewing tea and sets them on the table in front of Nick and me. We murmur our thanks while John looked back at Randy.

“What?” John asks.

“Do you really give a damn what happens to Adam?” Randy asks like he wants a sincere answer.

“Sure, Adam is easy to care about. He's got punk ass attitude, but he slips once in a while and lets me see that he needs the same things we all do. Like he needs you guys.”

Randy makes a satisfied sound as he looks at me before stating in a monotone, “Lawyers said this could take a few months. The family court isn’t always easy to work with and they're slow.” Randy remains silent for a moment before looking at John with a calculating expression, one I have seen very few times on his face.

“Okay, you say we can make this placement easier or harder. What are the rules?”

“Well, let’s make as few rules as necessary. Adam comes home and does his homework, we have dinner and then the boys do cleanup hour, a nightly chore. About seven thirty to eight thirty, providing his homework is done and there are no issues in school, you guys can visit. For now, I’m sorry, but it’ll have to be here. After we get to know Adam a little better, and he’s settled here, maybe he can go with you guys to the park or something. Trust is an earned thing. Adam and I had this talk. Right now he and I are working on that and we are making pretty good progress with it, I think. Trust is something that takes time. Agreed?”

I nod. “Yeah, I don’t like it, but at least I can see these two. What about weekends?”

“Well, they can’t ride in the vehicles due to insurance regs, but if we are going to, say, the movies, and they happen to show up, well, we can’t help coincidence, can we?” John smiles. It occurs to me he is pretty smart, using my friends to keep me in line, dangling them like a carrot for me. It is the one thing I would behave willingly for. They are all I have left.

“Okay, we’ll help him behave, and he better do his damned homework,” Randy growls at me. I laugh at him while John excuses himself.

“So, game plan. We both have study hall with you fifth period - homework time,” Randy instructs me.

“But when will I have time to drool over my boyfriend?” I whine.

“In the halls, slacker,” Randy grins and Nick places a protective arm around me. Just then Joe walks into the room and Nick begins to withdraw his arm, but I move my hand and catch his before it snakes away from me and pull it back around.

“Cool, dude, way cool,” Joe says with a smile and Nick relaxes onto me a bit.

“Um, Randy, want some tea?” Joe asks.

“No.” He is cut off as I kick him under the table, and urge him, with a look, to accept the damned tea. So he switches gears as he looks at Joe. “Jesus, I guess I do Joe. Thanks,” he replies while meeting my look with a questioning one of his own. Joe happily pours the tea and brings it to Randy, asking if he wants some sugar as well. Randy nods the affirmative and Joe happily complies. Nick begins to giggle under his breath, and Randy just looks confused before Joe wisely decides he has stayed almost too long and says his good nights.

“What’s so fucking funny?” Randy growls, and Nick and I collapse on each other with giggles not quite stifled, and Randy just looks at us and shakes his head, probably thinking it’s just some queer thing. We stand in the driveway and I begin to feel empty again as I know it is time for them to leave, back to normal lives and their own families. I feel a pang of loss as Randy hugs me, but before he can release me I pull him hard to me, holding him close and trying to communicate how much love I have for my best friend. I release him and his eyes shimmer in the moonlight, full of feeling and understanding. Randy retreats to the car and Nick and I are alone again, the pale light of the moon glowing across us and casting shadows on the walls.

“Well, I guess I should go,” Nick starts, and my face falls.

“What? We’ll be there in school tomorrow. What’s wrong?” he asks.

“I’m sad. Sad that you’re going, and sad that I can’t come with you. I was really hoping for…” I feel my cheeks burn as I look at him. “I was up for a while last night.”

“What kept you up, baby?” he asks while stroking my cheek.

“My first kiss,” I say as I meet his eyes.

“Oh, is that all you wanted? Don’t you know you can kiss me anytime you want?” he asks with his sweet and sexy smile as he leans forward and it happens again. I was rapidly climbing way past cloud ten – I passed cloud nine just waiting for our lips to touch - and then a rocket booster is added on as I feel his tongue at my lips, and I agreeably open my mouth to it. Mint from the tea is lightly on his tongue as it slides into my mouth, and I hungrily mesh my tongue with his in yet another first for me.

He applies a steady suction on my mouth and before I know it my tongue is residing in his mouth, the taste of mint strong as I run my tongue behind his teeth, under his tongue and across the top of his mouth, exploring each spot within my reach. He pulls away from me and then eyes me suspiciously.

“You sure you never did that before?” he asks while breathing heavily.

“Nope, just been thinking about it all night, and all day, since you kissed me yesterday,” I reply with my cheeks burning brighter than the moon above us.

“You think you could do that once more?” he asks with a twinkle in his eye.

“Did Randy say anything?” he asks.

“Joe...” I whine.

“Come on! By the way, nice lip lock out there!” he whistles at me, “Do you even breathe?” he snorts with laughter.

“I was practicing my kissing,” I said petulantly. “It isn't for your amusement.”

“Ya think?” he laughs some more.

“You guys are getting ready for bed, right?” John calls up.

“Yeah,” we say in chorus and then giggle at our stereo effect.

“So,” Joe begins while I take off my shirt and reach for a tee to sleep in, “Is Nick a good kisser?” I look at him and must have the dopiest grin on my face.

“I’ll take that as a yes!” he laughs as he rolls back on my bed.

“Nick is, like,” I fall silent as Joe suddenly goes still and is rapt with attention, “he’s like this gentle, considerate love. He treats me with this respect and his touch leaves me breathless. And then, when he kisses, it’s like an accelerant.”

“A what?” he asked.

“An accelerant. It’s, like, I’m this small flame until he gets near me, and then it’s like this explosion, this fireball of energy that I really can’t describe any better,” I reply.

“I knew you were a flamer the first time I saw you,” he giggles as I flip him the bird.

“All I can say is, Nick can flat-out kiss, and the only thing I can think to do is practice holding my breath so I can keep my lips on his a lot longer!” I say with a real smile on my face.

“So, you think Randy has a clue?’ Joe asks, trying for nonchalance but failing utterly.

“Nah, Rand’s oblivious when girls like him, he just thinks Nick and I are insane for laughing when you served him,” I smile at Joe. “Just remember, if you play it right, you’ll get the best friend you ever had.”

“I try and think of it that way, but all I ever see in my dreams is Randy and me replacing you and Nick out there,” he sighs.

“Impossible dreams, Joe.”

“And you guys actually wonder why I say it’s axiomatic that you are up to something! To bed with you!” John scares the hell out of us by rounding the doorway, not to mention that he got up the stairs without making a God-damned sound.

Joe departs and I close my door and switch off the light before getting under the covers.