Demon and the Fox - 1. Foxes Don't Do Packs

The restaurant was Sasha Reed’s favorite. It was Japanese, and ramen was their specialty. They even made their own noodles. He sat in a corner at a small table, clutching his phone. Nick was late. Thirty minutes late now.

There were no windows in the restaurant. The walls were painted a deep plum shade. The tables and chairs were cherry red. There was a painting of cherry blossoms above the table where Sasha sat. A Japanese game show was playing on the wide screen TV on the opposite wall. The slim, black-haired waitress came to bring him a glass of water, and Sasha thanked her absentmindedly.

He wondered if Nick would mind that there were no windows. It was an original concept, and made for a surprisingly intimate setting in Sasha’s opinion. Besides he didn’t much care for the view on Lexington Avenue. He saw it everyday when taking the bus to school. But now he was remembering that Nick was a bit claustrophobic; he hated elevators and stuff. Maybe he’d hate this place.

Sasha felt shivery all of a sudden. He slid his black hoodie back on, still clutching his phone in his hand. Why was it so cold? It was only the first week of May; they wouldn’t have turned on the AC yet, would they?

Well, this was annoying. Waiting. And Nick wasn’t replying to his texts. They hadn’t seen each other in ten days. Nick almost never replied to his texts. And now, after finally accepting to go out on a date, you’d think the least Nick could do was text him to inform him that he would be late, and maybe make up some lame excuse. An emergency piercing removal at his work, perhaps, or—

“Hi.”

Startled, Sasha looked up. Nick was here. He was smiling. He took off his sunglasses and tossed them on the table, before taking a seat in front of Sasha.

Sasha dropped his phone next to the sunglasses and cleared his voice.

“Hey. You’re late.”

Nick crossed his long legs under the table and grabbed a menu.

“But I’m here now.” Light brown eyes glanced up at Sasha. “Your texts sounded like you really wanted me to come here with you.”

“Yeah… this is my favorite restaurant, and I figured,” Sasha said, all in a rush, “we’ve never been on a, you know, on an actual date, and there’s stuff I need to talk to you about.”

“I’m all ears. But let’s order first I’m starving.”

Nick pushed some dark strands of hair away from his forehead and twisted around in his seat so he could make eye contact with the waitress. Sasha’s glance went over Nick. It was easier to look when Nick wasn’t looking back. He wore tight pale jeans—almost white—and a dark green button down shirt, rolled at the elbows. The clothes looked new and expensive. And he couldn’t help but notice that the sunglasses Nick had so carelessly tossed on the table were Gucci. Why would he wear sunglasses anyway? It had to be getting dark outside by now.

“I’ll have the red curry ramen,” Nick said when the waitress stopped by with her tiny notepad and pen, “extra extra spicy.” He smiled, and looked over at Sasha. So did the waitress.

“Right.” Sasha sat up straight, tucked his hair behind his ear. “I’d like the fishcake ramen please. Just the, um, normal amount of spicy.”

“And two glasses of plum wine,” Nick added before the waitress could walk away.

Sasha’s stomach did a nervous lurch. What was Nick doing? He was only eighteen, and Sasha was seventeen. Surely the staff would be suspicious and card them.

But the waitress just jotted it down, smiled, gathered up their menus and then she was gone. Sasha relaxed a bit. The place was fairly busy and noisy. People at other tables were just enjoying nice meals and conversations. No one seemed to care if there were minors ordering alcoholic drinks at the small table in the corner.

“Have you ever had plum wine?” Nick was asking. “It’s delicious. A little too sweet for certain people’s taste, but I think you’ll like it. Foxes like sweet things.”

Sasha kept his voice low. “I’m not a fox.”

“Once a month you are,” Nick teased.

He had felt cold before, but now Sasha felt too hot. It was probably all those candles. There were three candles per table in this place. What was up with that? He slid his arms out of the thin black hoodie and threw it across the back of his chair.

When he turned back around, Nick was staring. Sasha tucked his hair behind his ear again, and winced as he inadvertently touched the new piercing he had there. He wondered if perhaps that was what Nick was staring at. Sasha had gotten the piercing entirely for himself, of course. But at the same time, he knew Nick was a piercer, and would probably like it. Nick himself had one piercing in his eyebrow and something like seven or eight in his ears in total. Sasha wasn’t even sure. But it looked good on him.

“What is it?” Sasha asked when Nick kept staring but said nothing.

“No, it’s just…” For the first time since he’d gotten here, Nick looked a bit troubled. Vulnerable. “You just…” He raked a pale hand in his raven hair. Sasha sometimes forgot that Nick’s mother had been Korean. Nick could pass as Caucasian. But the sleek dark hair, fine-boned nose and full lips were hints of his half-Asian genes. He looked handsome; pretty-boy traits clashing with a nicely defined jaw line and high cheekbones.

“I just what?”

But Nick never finished what he’d started to say. The Japanese girl came back with the wine.

“It’ll just be a few more minutes for the ramen,” she smiled.

“That’s perfect,” said Nick.

As soon as she went to tend to another table Nick grabbed his glass and took a few long sips. Then he took a deep breath and settled back in his chair.

“How have you been, anyway?” Sasha asked. He didn’t feel like drinking wine, actually. “I was really worried about you.” He lowered his voice to a whisper. “You almost died.”

Nick was looking at the Japanese game show on the TV. “I know.”

“But you seem fine,” Sasha said, answering his own question. “Buying new clothes, expensive sunglasses.”

“Shopping can be very,” Nick said, “therapeutic.”

There was a long silence. Sasha didn’t know what to say. Nick clearly didn’t feel like opening up. He just drank more wine, for now. Almost finished his glass. Sasha hadn’t even touched his yet.

He decided he might as well say what he had come here to say.

“Hey, listen, I’m going to university in the Fall. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s actually a really good university. I suck at school, but apparently I’m brilliant at swimming, because I got myself this awesome athlete scholarship. I didn’t even want to try, I didn’t think it was possible, but Gabriel insisted, and turns out he was right, I…”

Nick seemed to brighten up all of a sudden. He was listening intently now, light brown eyes riveted to Sasha.

“I got into Stanford, Nick.” He laughed. He could hardly believe it himself. “I know, it’s insane. But they have these scholarships, and this guy came to see me swim in competitions, and—”

He interrupted himself when their waitress came back with two huge steaming bowls full of noodles. She placed them on the table, and asked if everything was okay.

“It’s perfect,” Nick said, “thanks.”

Sasha grabbed his chopsticks. Nick jumped slightly when he did so, like he was afraid Sasha would attack him with those.

“What’s wrong?” Sasha asked.

“No, nothing. Itadakimasu!” He said, making Sasha laugh.

“Nice. It’s like your Japanese accent is flawless.”

Nick waved it off. “Nah. It’s practically the only word I know.”

Sasha started to feel better after they ate a bit. The food was delicious, obviously. He even drank a bit of wine. And Nick was right. It was sweet. And he did like it. This wasn’t so bad. And so what if Nick had expensive clothes and sunglasses? A lot of gay men liked to go shopping a lot. It was a stereotype, but there was always some truth to stereotypes. Sasha supposed he didn’t really fit in the stereotype, though. He looked down at himself briefly; worn gray converse sneakers, black skinny jeans, and a dark orange t-shirt. There was a quote on his t-shirt: Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.

“So you got into Stanford,” Nick said, taking a break from his spicy ramen to drain the rest of his wine. “That’s pretty impressive.”

“It’s far, though. So I was thinking…” Sasha put down his chopsticks, took a deep breath. “You could come with me. You could find a piercing parlor there, or a rock climbing gym where you could work, maybe.” His heart started beating ridiculously fast, and loud, like it wanted to scramble out of his chest or something. Seriously, it was almost painful. Sasha massaged the back of his neck, letting some dark blonde strands fall into his eyes, like a curtain hiding him from Nick’s stare.

“Sasha, I, um…” Nick hesitated.

It was weird to hear him say his name. Nick’s voice was the same as always. A low voice. Soft, masculine. But something was different. He didn’t say his name the same way. Not like he used to say it. This was a much different tone. Somewhat condescending. Sasha wasn’t sure he liked it.

“I know,” Sasha said, “it sounds crazy, but—”

“Stop.” Nick closed his eyes for a moment. “Stop saying that. It’s not crazy. You like me. You want me to be your boyfriend. You’re smart enough to know we’re not going to be together if I stay in New York and you go to California.”

“Well, yeah, pretty much.” Sasha let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding. He let his hands drop on the table, fingers tracing the foot of his wine glass. His heart was still beating super fast. He chanced a glance upward. Nick’s eyes were soft. The golden brown flecks in them looked almost orange in the candle light.

“I need to tell you something,” Nick said. “There’s no easy way to say this.”

“You’re not wearing the necklace,” Sasha blurted out before he could stop himself. He had just noticed. Sasha had given him a necklace a few weeks ago. A metallic chain with a feather and wing pendant. That necklace used to be his mother’s, and he’d given it to Nick. And Nick said he would wear it everyday, and he really did. Until now, apparently.

Nick touched his neck, as though making sure there was nothing there.

Before he could say anything, Sasha added, “Are you breaking up with me? You can’t break up with me. We weren’t even really together. Yet.”

Oh God, had he really said that last part out loud? This was so embarrassing. He lowered himself in his chair, casting a glance around the room. But no one was listening, of course. Why would they? Everybody else seemed like they were having much nicer conversations. Even that guy who sat all by himself in the opposite corner of the restaurant, a book open next to his ramen bowl, looked like he was having a much nicer time. On the screen, the game show was over, and now a J-pop video was playing.

“I’m sorry,” Nick was saying, “I don’t like the idea of hurting your feelings.”

Oh God.

“You don’t like the idea of hurting my feelings?” What kind of lame break-up line was that, anyway? Who said things like that? Nicholas Russell did, apparently. Sasha wasn’t sure he liked him anymore. In fact, he kind of hated him right now. He really did.

What made it worst was that Nick did look troubled, and, well, sad. Sasha crossed his arms against his chest, clutching at the thin fabric of his t-shirt. He looked away. He didn’t care if Nick was sad. Whatever. This sucked.

They had been through Hell and back together. Literally! And now this.

“Sasha.” At least the condescending tone was gone. Now Nick sounded sincere, actually. Still, that didn’t make it any better. Nick went on, “To tell you the truth, I’ve met someone else.”

For some reason, that hurt more than anything else. Every word was like getting stabbed in the chest. And like the knife was twisting, and twisting.

I’ve met someone else.

“Who?” Sasha asked. He couldn’t help it. And he’d meant for it to sound all cold and detached. But instead his voice sounded weak and almost timid, and he cursed himself for it.

Nick took his sweet time to answer, too.

“Look, there’s a party tonight. You should come. I’ll introduce you.”

Oh, wow. This was rich.

“Do I look like I want to go to some party with you and your new boyfriend?”

Apparently he did. Nick took out his phone and started to type. “I’ll send you the address right now. It’s in the Upper East Side. Beautiful apartment. You’ll love it. I’ve been hanging out there quite a bit lately, actually.” Nick put his phone away. Sasha’s phone bleeped with the new text but he didn’t check it. Nick kept talking, like he just wanted to fill the silence. “Because otherwise I get lonely by myself, you know. And Hell’s Kitchen is a bit—well, I’ll probably move out of there soon enough…”

Sasha shook his head. “Wait. Lonely? What about Shane and Riley? They were always fussing over you. I’m pretty sure they wouldn’t let you get lonely.”

“Oh, they don’t live with me anymore.” Nick licked his lips. Sighed. He was looking fondly at his unfinished ramen, actually. Like he very much wanted to eat more of it, but he felt it would be inappropriate.

“How come?” Sasha asked. But he felt tired. He didn’t really want to sit here and pretend to have some friendly conversation. And he certainly didn’t want to go to Nick’s party. Upper East Side or not.

“Riley went to Las Vegas to be a casino dealer, even though that job got him killed the first time around. Anyway, long story. He should do whatever he wants with his life, right? Shane went back to live with his parents for a little while.”

Sasha didn’t want to listen to this anymore. He didn’t care about the details of Nick’s life right now. He had been all excited to tell Nick about Stanford, and to ask him if he wanted to come with him to California. Now he just felt pathetic. And he felt sick, too, like he would throw up. He put a hand against his chest, and grabbed his hoodie.

“I need to go. I’m sorry. I hope you have fun at the party.”

“You should come, though,” Nick insisted as Sasha got up abruptly. The chair’s legs made a rattling noise that startled a few other clients of the restaurant. But Nick looked unfazed.

“Yeah,” Sasha muttered, “I don’t think so.”

“Why not?” Nick sounded sincere and genuine, which made everything worst for some reason. Their eyes met and Sasha felt a pang in his chest. Damn, the bastard had pretty eyes. That, too, made everything worst.

“Just… leave it, okay?”

And he stormed out of the restaurant. Nick could pay the damn bill, for all Sasha cared. He looked like he had money, with his stupid Gucci sunglasses.

Sasha found it hard to breathe. He had thought it was because of the clustered restaurant, with the stupid no window concept and all—maybe he was becoming claustrophobic.

But now he was outside and breathing was still difficult. It was dark, but not really, the way it never truly looked like nighttime in the city, with all the street lights. The buildings towering up in the dark sky gave him vertigo. He crawled to the side of the building and hid in the small service alley there. Closing his eyes, he leaned against the rough brick wall. He listened to the loud circulation sounds. So many cars, so many people.

It wasn’t cold—there was barely any wind—but he felt cold. He clutched his hoodie against his chest but didn’t put it on. Maybe he wanted to feel cold. It was still so painful to breathe, like a giant fist was crushing his chest more and more with every passing second. Sasha felt like waves of pain ripped through him. He was aware of tears rolling down his cheeks, and did nothing to stop them. He was alone anyway. No one could see him, right?

He opened his eyes, scanned the small alley. Deserted. Quiet. Smelled like garbage. The wall across him had ‘fuck you’ graffitied on it. Nice.

Heartbreak, he thought. The word just sort of came to him, and he thought about it. He’d never really experienced the stupid thing before. It really did feel like Hell. And Sasha had been to Hell, so he’d know.

It was just so humiliating! He’d been all excited, and nervous, and he’d had this stupid longing to see Nick again, and then Nick had said that he was sorry, and that he’d met someone else, and just like that there was nothing. Nothing left. And after everything they’d been through—

He got a text. Blinking the tears out of his eyes, he looked at the small screen of his phone. Well first there was Nick’s text with the address for the party. Sasha rolled his eyes. As if he’d go to that.

The second text was also from Nick, actually. Fucking fantastic. This one said: ‘Please do come to the party. It’s not what you think.’ Followed by: ‘I don’t have a new boyfriend.’

Sasha frowned, wiping under his eyes. What was that supposed to mean?

Still. Not like he’d even consider going to that party.

…

The apartment had a view on the Harlem River. Its waters looked calm and dark in the night. There wasn’t much of a moon tonight, Sasha thought as he looked at the sky. Just a sliver, and it was hidden behind clouds right now.

Sasha turned away from the massive rectangular window, letting go of the thick velvet curtain he’d been holding as someone offered him a drink.

“Do you want some?” It was rum and coke.

The guy offering him a drink was short and skinny with dorky curly hair and rectangular glasses to go with the look. He looked like Harry Potter; the real Harry Potter from the books, not Daniel Radcliffe. But his name was Charles, Sasha remembered. Not Harry. He had already been introduced to everyone earlier.

“No, thanks,” Sasha said. “I’m good with my coffee.”

He’d bought himself an overpriced, oversized latte at Starbucks before coming to the party.

“Well,” Charles said, “would you like some rum in your coffee?”

Sasha tilted his head, considering this. “Huh. Why not?”

“Awesome!” Charles looked really happy as he skittered back toward the kitchen.

Everybody else was in the living room. The owner of the apartment was some tall, broad-shouldered guy named Kyle. He had brown hair that was gelled high up in the air. Kyle stood next to his big fancy aquarium right now with a rum and coke—seemed to be rum-and-coke-night—explaining to Charles’ sister Amanda that he had read somewhere that taking care of tropical fish was very calming and zen. Sasha wondered why the fish had to be tropical. In Kyle’s defense, the fish were very pretty and colorful. One of them looked dead, though.

Amanda looked like a female version of Harry Potter. But prettier, though, he could give her that.

So there was Charles, Amanda, and Kyle. Sasha was proud of himself for remembering their names, at least. He wasn’t usually good with names.

And then there was Nick, and another pair of siblings: Hazel and Jackson Snow.

Nick sat alone in a blue velvet sofa, leaning against a comfy looking white pillow. Jackson and Hazel sat together on a big bright yellow couch. Nick and Jackson were drinking red wine. The expensive-looking red bottle and their two glasses were placed in the center of a white coffee table. It was a nice table but it had a fair amount of stains. Why a white coffee table? This place was too colorful, anyway. It was hurting Sasha’s eyes. He wasn’t in the mood for colorful.

Charles came back with the rum and poured some in Sasha’s coffee. A little too much, actually. It almost spilled.

“Um, that’s enough I think…”

“It’s okay! You’re allowed to have some fun.” Charles winked at him under his glasses. “We’re all just glad you’re okay.”

This was a werewolf get-together, actually. These were the five werewolves that had helped Nick and Cyan in their fight against Lucas and Liv.

Sasha failed to see what he was doing here. He hadn’t even been part of the fight. Not really. He was merely a zombie brainwashed by Liv, back then. Just thinking about it, about Liv and Devin and how they took his powers, leaving him an almost dead shell of himself, made his insides twist and knot. He drank some of his coffee, trying to stay calm. It didn’t taste too bad with the rum, but it didn’t seem to have any calming properties. Maybe he should invest in some tropical fish, too.

He wasn’t too sure what Nick was doing here, either. Nick wasn’t a werewolf. He hated werewolves, from what Sasha knew. He’d only accepted their help because he had no other choice. In fact, he was supposed to hate these particular werewolves because of what they’d done to Sasha, just a few weeks ago. Their pack had kidnapped him, roughened him up, and tied him up. And all because Hazel’s father was crazy and wanted her to have some hybrid werewolf/werefox babies.

Thank God that hadn’t happened. Hazel and Sasha were both seventeen, for Christ’s sake. Her father really was mad.

So yeah, this was kind of awkward.

Plus Sasha kept wondering if Nick was dating one of these guys. He had said he didn’t have a new boyfriend, but before that he’d said all that stuff about meeting someone new. So what was the deal? Was he dating Charles? That would be odd. Charles was odd. A nearsighted werewolf. What was up with that?

Was he dating Jackson? No, come on, that was very unlikely. Sure, they were sharing a bottle of red wine right now, but there was no sexual tension there. Jackson was sitting in the farthest possible seat from Nick. And he looked all stuck up and uncomfortable in his neat, slim black suit. Why was he wearing a suit, anyway?

From the looks of it, Kyle wasn’t gay. He kept flirting with Amanda. Well, clearly his idea of flirting was to talk about tropical fish, which perhaps wasn’t the best technique, but that wasn’t the point.

Hazel got up then, and cleared her throat. Everyone sort of stopped talking and looked at her. Well, good, Sasha thought. Maybe she would finally explain what this little soiree was all about.

“I thought we should get together after what happened ten days ago. I should’ve done this sooner, but I suppose I still wasn’t sure. I’m sure now. I know what I want to do.” She looked nice, with a simple long sleeve black shirt, tiny plaid skirt, and thigh high black socks. With her pixie platinum blonde hair, she looked like a manga character.

Kyle stepped forward with Amanda. They stood right next to the sofa where Nick sat. Charles went to stand rather close to Hazel as well. Sasha was the only one who stayed back, standing next to the window with the thick velvet curtain. He liked that window.

“It felt good working together,” said Hazel in a confident, strong voice. “It was a rush, and it was thrilling. But it was also good team work. You guys showed incredible loyalty by following me in this battle to help save Sasha.” Now everyone was turning their head, looking at Sasha. He just sipped at his coffee, trying to hide behind it. Hazel went on: “And to right the wrongs of my father. I hate the way he’s been leading his pack. Taking decisions on his own. Forcing us to do things we don’t want to do. Kicking beloved members of the pack out of this city just because he doesn’t like their lifestyles, or he thinks they’re too poor, or don’t have a good enough job. I miss the wolves he sent away. I want to bring them back. That is why,” she took a deep breath, “I want to rebel. I don’t want to be in Kevin Snow’s pack anymore. I want my own pack. And I want you to be my first members. It would be an honor to be your pack leader. We would work together, always. We would stick together. The only reason I would ever kick a wolf out of my pack would be if that wolf hurt other people deliberately. There are ways to live as a werewolf and never hurt anyone. And I want to teach this to any wolf that will join me in the future. I believe that is the goal of a wolf pack, and that’s how it should be.” She was getting all worked up. Sasha was impressed. He never knew she had this much fire inside her.

She let out a nervous laugh to break the tension. “In other words, I’m done with my father’s crap.”

They all laughed at that. They looked happy. No one looked as if this was a big shock to them. They looked like they’d expected her to say something like that. Kyle was looking at Hazel fondly, like he was proud of her. And Charles and Amanda were smiling at each other. You could tell they were a bit apprehensive of the future. But their faces were open and trusting. Hazel’s words were stronger than their fear.

Jackson got up and hugged his sister briefly. It was a bit awkward. Jackson didn’t look like he was a hugger. He pulled away and smoothed down his suit.

Then Nick got up and said something to Hazel. Kyle had just put on some obnoxious party music so it was difficult to hear. Thankfully Sasha had very acute hearing. Still, he trotted a bit closer, just to make sure he could listen to them.

“You look like you could use a drink.”

Hazel smiled and nodded as she stole a sip from Nick’s glass. The way she smiled at him… and the way he smiled back at her, and… and now they were hugging. But it wasn’t a friendly type of hug. Sasha moved closer still, sneakers soundlessly stepping across the polished hardwood floor.

He stopped short when he saw them kiss. At first his brain couldn’t really process the information. Nick and Hazel. Nick Russell and Hazel Snow. Together. If his brain had been a computer, it would’ve gone to some blue screen type of thing by now. An error has occurred…

But they really were kissing. And holding each other. Like it was the most natural thing in the world. Nick put down the glass of wine so he could hold her properly. His pale hands looked large against the small of her back. She rested her head against his shoulder.

Jackson and Kyle were talking together. About music. Jackson didn’t like the music Kyle had put on. Charles and Amanda were talking about their parents, and how they would react. If they should tell them or not.

Everybody else seemed to think it was normal for Nick and Hazel to be together like this. But Sasha was shocked. This was… this was brutal. Seeing it like this. Seeing them kiss with no warning whatsoever. Nick hadn’t even told him. Hadn’t had the decency.

God, Nick was really the worst at break ups, wasn’t he? He was a horrible human being, Sasha decided. He felt sick again. He wanted to leave, now.

No one would care if he left. What was he doing here anyway? He didn’t care about Hazel’s werewolf pack. He wasn’t a wolf. He was a fox. Foxes didn’t do packs. They were loners. Everyone knew that.

So he tried to slip out quietly, still holding his coffee. Rum and coffee. Stupid Charles.

He made it to the hall, but not to the door.

Hazel stopped him. He was arrested mid-motion as he’d been about to grab his hoodie from the coat rack. Hazel, with her worried, soft gray eyes. Hazel, the last person he wanted to talk to right now. Why would her parents name her Hazel if she had gray eyes? It just didn’t make sense. It was a stupid name, anyway.

“Sasha wait,” she said. But there didn’t seem to be a follow up.

She just looked like she was sorry. Oh God, if she started to spout nonsense about being sorry and not liking the idea of hurting his feelings, he would go back to the living room and jump out of that window.

Before she could say anything, Nick joined them.

Scratch that about Hazel being the last person he wanted to talk to right now.

Nick was frowning. “I didn’t know how to tell you. But now you know.”

Without either one of them looking down, their hands found each other. Their fingers linked and intertwined. Well, even if they weren’t looking, Sasha looked. Unfortunately. He let out a dry chuckle and glanced away. A picture of Jackson and Kyle at high school graduation was framed on the wall. They were wearing the silly caps and holding their diplomas and everything, and Kyle was holding Jackson’s shoulder tight like a true bro. Sasha wasn’t in the mood for bro-themed photos.

“Yeah. I’m just gonna go.”

Hazel leaned toward him a bit, but Nick held her back. Good thing he did, too. Sasha didn’t want her to try to hug him. He didn’t want her pity hug.

“You’re more than welcome to be a part of my pack, Sasha. Please. We’re still friends, right?”

“Honestly, Hazel, I… I don’t want to be in your pack.” He snatched his hoodie and went to grab the doorknob. “Thanks for the offer. You guys take care, all right?” He tried really hard to sound cool and detached, to keep some amount of dignity. “Good luck with everything.”

He stepped out of the apartment and it took him all he had not to slam the door shut behind him.