Demon and the Fox - 10. Too Far From Home

Nick stirred awake and his first reflex was to pet a still sleeping Koda. He let his fingers trail across the husky’s soft dark fur. Koda had been keeping him company ever since he’d gotten away from Purgatory.

He was startled when he realized three people were standing in the curtained doorway, watching him. Nick’s entire body must have jumped, because Koda cracked one round brown eye open. Cyan and Raven were here, with their wings folded behind their backs; golden and navy. Like Cyan was an angel and Raven his dark counterpart. And standing between them, Sasha.

Sasha with his almond-shaped green eyes. He looked so much like Shay. But the eyes didn’t lie.

Wait, if Sasha was here…

Nick sat bolt upright, startling Koda. Nick’s sore body complained at the sudden movement but he ignored that. He still had one bandaged hand tangled in Koda’s fur.

“Why are you here?” Nick addressed Sasha.

But Raven was the one who answered him. “He’s not dead. Cyan just brought him here to party, even though he’s not supposed to.” Raven glared at Cyan, then flicked his gaze back to Nick. “I saw them and brought them down here to see you.”

Nick could breathe; Sasha was still alive. He was fine.

At first there was a silence. Then Sasha stepped forward inside the little room timidly. He wore combat boots, skinny jeans and a black tank top, and his dark blonde locks were all messy as they brushed his shoulders.

Nick’s chest and arms were covered in bandages, and Raven had lent him loose cotton pants. There was a part of Nick that wished Sasha didn’t have to see him like this, but the desire to be close to Sasha was stronger.

So as Sasha extended a hand, Nick took it. Sasha pulled him from the couch and they fell into each other’s arms. Sasha’s body was warm. Nick wished he could stop time and disappear into this moment.

“You lost weight,” he told Sasha quietly.

Sasha didn’t say a word. He just held him tight, so tight—like he never wanted to let go again. And Nick’s chest hurt under the bandages, but he didn’t care. He stroke Sasha’s hair with a hand, detangling it with his fingers. He noticed Sasha’s new ear piercing and smiled.

“I like this,” Nick said, the tip of his finger brushing Sasha’s ear.

He thought he felt Sasha tremble in his arms.

“I’m such an idiot,” Sasha said. “Such an idiot. Such—”

“Hey,” Nick cut in, “stop. Why would you say that?”

Now Sasha pulled away forcefully. He turned his back to Nick, holding his head in his hands. Then he let himself fall on the couch. Koda lifted his head and started to growl.

“Shut up, you.” Sasha glared at the husky.

But Koda kept on growling.

Nick sat carefully between Koda and Sasha. He scratched Koda’s ears to calm him. The growling stopped.

Sasha wasn’t looking at Nick. He rested his elbows on his thighs and hid his face in his hands.

“I’m a fucking idiot,” Sasha said.

Nick looked up at Raven and Cyan for help. “Can someone tell me what’s wrong with him?”

“Well!” Raven stretched his long pale arms. “Not that I don’t enjoy the whole sentimental drama thing, but… I don’t.” He ruffled Cyan’s hair. “I’ll let you handle this.” And he left. They could hear him climb up the stairs.

Cyan scowled as he smoothed down his long pale locks.

“Who needs that wanker anyway?” Cyan licked his lips, averted his gaze. “Nicky, I’m an idiot too.”

“Not helping, Cy.” Nick tried to meet his eyes, but Cyan wouldn’t let him.

Nick wished Raven had stayed. Raven had a talent for saying things bluntly.

Cyan didn’t. “You see, um, well… This isn’t easy to say. Malachy, he, well, I suppose he—”

“Malachy’s been possessing your body!” Sasha blurted out at once. His voice was shaky. He looked very fragile, and exhausted.

“Guys,” Nick said, “I know.”

Sasha’s shoulders slouched. “You do?”

“Yeah, I mean, it makes sense.” Nick played with the hem of the bandages around his arm. “I had a connection to Malachy. I died. He stepped in. I wasn’t a hundred percent sure, but I had my suspicions. You guys are just confirming it.”

“I didn’t know,” said Sasha, “I didn’t know.” He looked so livid. “I thought I healed you. Not him. And then you acted different, but I didn’t even... I’m a fucking idiot.”

Nick felt a pang in his chest. Sasha and Cyan were both averting their gazes from him. Koda must have felt Nick’s uneasiness because he shifted closer, resting his head on Nick’s thighs.

“What has he been doing?”

No one answered. Koda made a yelping noise and Nick resumed scratching his ears.

“Guys,” Nick said, “please. You’re killing me here. And I’m already dead, so.”

Sasha flinched.

Nick sighed. “Sorry, bad joke.”

“I just missed you so much,” Sasha said in a raspy voice. It looked like it took him all he had not to burst into tears. “The real you.”

Nick opened his arm and Sasha leaned into him at once, burying his face in Nick’s shoulder. Nick wrapped his arm around Sasha’s shoulders, squeezing tight. Without a word, Sasha curled up against him and closed his eyes, like he wanted the world to disappear—everything but the two of them.

Cyan’s wings disappeared with a rustling sound, shedding a few golden feathers that dropped to the floor quietly. Cyan winced like it hurt him a bit. The back of his shirt was all ripped. He came to face Nick, leaning back against the opposite wall of the narrow room. Cyan crossed his arms against his chest.

“Nicky, I… I swear to you I had no idea. I thought you were acting different because you were going through some kind of a phase. You know… you’re eighteen years old. Wouldn’t be the first eighteen year old boy acting different, doing out-of-character things, rebelling, or—”

“I know you think your tendency to beat around the bush is endearing, Cy,” Nick stared pointedly, “but please just this once give it to me straight. What has he been doing.”

Sasha flinched in Nick’s arms.

“Well,” Cyan shrugged one shoulder, “I suppose he did quite a lot, he, um, well, I could always tell you later, you look quite, injured right now, and—”

“Cyan!”

“He quit your two jobs.” Cyan took a deep breath. “He hooked up with Hazel Snow. He kicked out your two roommates. And… he dumped Sasha.”

Nick’s hold tightened around Sasha reflexively.

Dread curdled at the pit of his stomach. In three weeks. In three weeks, Malachy had done all of those things.

Kicked Shane and Riley out of the apartment.

Quit the piercing and tattoo parlor. Julian and Roxy must be so disappointed. And they probably hired someone new already.

And the part-time rock climbing instructor gig. Shane’s father had gotten him that job.

Hooked up with Hazel Snow? Oh, God…

Dumped Sasha.

“Now you know that wasn’t me.” His hand slid out of Koda’s fur so he could place both arms around Sasha. “That was not me.”

Sasha slowly pulled away and Nick looked into pale green eyes. Their arms were still around each other but Nick was starting to feel cold without Sasha’s body pressed against him.

“I love you,” Nick said.

There was just something about those three words, almost like it physically hurt to say them without being sure the other person would say them back.

And Sasha didn’t. But he looked like he was in pain, too. He was really pale, like he was going to be sick. And he exchanged a nervous glance with Cyan. There was something they weren’t telling him.

“I’m going to kill Malachy,” Sasha said quietly. He pulled away from Nick and stood. Sasha started pacing the room, in between Nick and Cyan, even though there wasn’t much room to pace. “As soon as we get Nick back in his body, and we get him out. I swear I’m going to kill the mother fucker.”

“Calm down, little fox,” Cyan stepped in. “Let’s just focus on the getting Nicky back part, and—”

“Do not,” Sasha stopped pacing and glared at Cyan, “tell me to calm down.”

Reflexively Nick had started to pet Koda again. He found it relaxing. He didn’t want to start freaking out right now. It seemed Sasha was freaking out enough for the both of them.

Sasha’s tone was accusing as he stared Cyan down. “You didn’t even know! You’re supposed to be a Dark Angel. New York City’s Reaper. You’re supposed to be on top of your shit. And you didn’t even know. You should’ve figured it out. These things happen in your world.”

“They don’t, though!” Cyan replied heatedly. “This is bloody Malachy we’re talking about here! The man has a reputation for being insane and unpredictable. Only Higher Demons can perform demonic possession, and even they don’t do it. Malachy was only a Dark Angel and he did it anyway. No one saw that coming. How was anyone supposed to know he’d try it again? And from Purgatory? It’s unthinkable. Don’t blame me, Alexander. We’re all in this together. I care about Nicky, too. I’ll help him get his body back.”

Sasha looked like he was about ready to pass out. Nick felt something clench at his chest. He looked over at Cyan.

“How do we do that?” Nick asked.

“You’d have to become a Reaper, first.” Cyan held up a gloved hand and listed on his fingers. “Possibly a Dark Angel. Learn how to materialize in the human world. Then we’ve got to find a way to kick Malachy out, so you can jump in. You’ll be possessing your own body, I suppose. But it would work. You’d be human again. You’d be you again. Resuming your life as if you’d just pressed pause.”

Nick shuddered. “I didn’t press pause, though. Someone else has been playing instead of me.”

Cyan nodded, looking away.

“How long is all that gonna take?” Sasha let out a frustrated growl, raking his fingers through his hair. “I hate him so much. He has no right to go around pretending to be Nick. Can’t I just kill him? Then Nick jumps back in, and I heal him.” Sasha looked down at his palms. “I’ve been practicing. I’m even better than before.”

“We believe you, little fox. But that’s too reckless. If Nicky can’t do it and his body dies,” Cyan said, “then it’s game over.”

“Can we please,” Sasha snapped, “quit it with the video game metaphor?”

There was a silence.

Nick pulled himself off the couch and Koda whined in protest. Nick’s cotton pants were full of dog hairs. Nick stepped closer to Sasha, and he wanted to reach out to him, but Sasha just looked so angry and frustrated that Nick thought better of it. He didn’t know what to do to make Sasha feel better.

“I’ll get my life back as soon as I can, I promise.” Nick had meant for his voice to sound determined, but instead it came out weak and fragile.

“You need to hurry,” Sasha replied. He had dark circles under his eyes.

Nick felt cold. “I know,” he said. “On the meantime, I need you down there, okay? I need to know you’re safe. Stay away from Malachy.”

“Stay away? Are you insane? I need to keep an eye on that bastard. Make sure he doesn’t do anything crazy—anything that could hurt you.”

Nick shook his head, but he knew arguing with Sasha was pointless.

“Just promise me you’ll be careful.”

“You promise me you’ll be careful,” Sasha retorted.

For a moment they just stared at each other stubbornly. Nick couldn’t stop looking into those green eyes, and he got the sudden urge to kiss him. Wouldn’t that make everything better, even for just one moment?

But Cyan stepped in. “All right, all right, everybody’s going to be careful indeed. Sasha, love, that’s enough Hell time for the fragile little human that you are.”

Cyan made to take Sasha’s arm softly, but Sasha pushed him away violently, even before Cyan’s fingers could touch his skin. Cyan’s back collided into the wall. Nick stepped away. What was up with this sudden outburst of aggressiveness? Why was Sasha so angry at Cyan?

“I’m a fox spirit,” Sasha snapped, “I can handle it.”

Cyan was very patient. “I know that. But even fox spirits need to get their sleep, to eat some food. It’s the full moon tomorrow night, or have you forgotten? If your body is too weak when you transform, that’s dangerous. Come on, Sasha. If not for yourself, then do it for Gabriel. He needs you alive and well.”

Sasha seemed to calm down when he heard Gabriel’s name. His shoulders relaxed and his green eyes lidded.

This time, when Cyan reached out to hold his arm, Sasha let him.

“I’ll take him home and I’ll be right back, mate.” Cyan looked over at Nick. Black veils of smoke started to curl up around Cyan and Sasha. “I’ll take you to my crypt. There’s loads of fluffy blankets and pillows, and hair products. You’ll love it. Wait here for me.”

The smoke intensified and Sasha closed his eyes as Cyan shifted. They were gone.

Nick fell back on the couch with Koda. He felt a sharp pang. Longing.

He wished he could go home with Sasha. They could sleep in the same bed for like twelve hours, and have breakfast together in the morning—or afternoon.

Wait here for me.

Nick scoffed to himself, looking down at his bandaged arms.

Where else was he supposed to go?