Fallen Pride - 9. Chapter 9

“Try again.”

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

“I’ll be fine. I’m quick, don’t worry. Try again.”

“OK.” Lahja took a deep breath, closed his eyes for a moment and listened to the space between the thudding of his heart. It was getting easier to call the body ‘his’ now; the strange way he had talked about ‘it’ had earned him glances from the people he lives with he did not like, and he was glad these were fading too. Between one heartbeat and the next, the demon opened his eyes, focused on his target, and tried to push all his energy in that direction. Kiaza threw himself to the ground, but there was no point, because the light which spread from him was directionless. Brighter than the campfires in the sky, blazing cold and pale, it was so bright that for a long time afterwards, neither Kiaza nor Lahja could make much out through the purple and blue after effects. Lahja collapsed on a stone bench as his serpentine friend came to join him.

“I’m not getting any better, am I?”

“No.” Kiaza didn’t see the point in lying to the former angel. One thing they had discovered over the past few days was Lahja had a compass for truth and honesty. Zai’s attempt to lie about why he was covered in blood on arriving for dinner had produced screams of horror which had made Kiaza’s teeth ache. Lying to their new house mate turned out to be more painful than introducing him to things which made him shiver in fear and revulsion. “Let’s give it a rest, eh?”

Lahja sighed heavily, and turned his slit-eyed gaze upwards.

“Nassau’s going to be disappointed in me.”

“You worry too much what Nassau thinks.” Kiaza glanced sideways at the pale man. It was easy to believe Lahja was a human, apart from his eyes, and the soft, almost indistinguishable shape of the wings that spread behind him. Kiaza wasn’t even sure the boy was aware of them.

“He gave me clothes, my room, everything. I don’t want to let him down.” Lahja looked back at his serpentine companion. “I’m doing it again, aren’t I?”

Kiaza nodded. After the moment, three nights ago now, when Lahja had tried to give thanks to The Lord before dinner, Inai had snapped. The big naga was a terrifying vision to behold, and Lahja hadn’t realized his jaw could open quite so wide.

“Your fucking Lord has nothing to do with it!” The tightening of the naga’s coils made an uncomfortable creaking noise, like pressure on bones. “If you want to thank anyone, Tobias cooked it, and Vruuaska and Shindae went and got most of it for us. You still don’t seem to understand, do you boy?”

It made Lahja irrationally angry whenever someone disregarded the use of his name, and everyone had to turn away and shield their eyes at the force of the light which flashed from him. The big snake had fallen back on his coils swearing incoherently.

After Inai had left, muttering to himself, Zai had explained as softly as he could, that hell wasn’t like where Lahja had lived before, and they were expected to be largely self-sufficient in many respects. Nassau might have brought Lahja to them, but it didn’t mean the fallen angel owed him anything.

“He is our sovereign, but that’s all.”

“Isn’t that enough?”

“Yes and no.” Zai had struggled for words. It had been a long time since he’d actually thought about putting his or anyone else’s relationship with their Prince into words. “We show him respect...”

“Some more than others,” Kiaza quipped.

“… and we do his bidding.”

“Sometimes.”

“But he’s not going to check up on you or be angry if you don’t do every single thing he might expect, or want. You’re your own free agent Lahja. Just try not to kill us all with that damn light of yours.”

Trying to control ‘that damn light’ was what he and Kiaza had spent most of the last three days doing. Jahke had been the one to discover Lahja’s negative reaction to touch wasn’t particularly predictable. His habit of hugging people in greeting hadn’t allowed his brain time to process that it wouldn’t be such a good idea to try it out on his new housemate, and Jahke had smiled with the gesture, let go, and stepped back, all before Lahja’s mind had caught up. Then when Lahja had touched his fingers as he’d taken a cup from the slender demon, Jahke had been knocked across the room. Kiaza’s idea to teach him to be able to turn it on and focus on a specific direction was proving largely fruitless.

“Kiaza?”

“Yes?”

“What do you know about angels?”

Lahja gazed up at the sky as he asked the question. The sky here was blue, but Nassau’s magic was all encompassing, and the light of the campfires was still visible through the haze. Kiaza had said the garden of the palace was a better place for them to practice, because no one went there except with the express permission of the Prince, and there were fewer things to damage. Lahja hadn’t known what to expect, but Nassau’s garden looked like pictures he’d seen of paradise, of the Eden of long ago where Adam and Eve had frolicked naked and unashamed before the snake had tricked them. To sit on a bench under another beautiful fruit bearing tree with a snake seemed like a strange parody, but Lahja couldn’t guess what the lesson was.

“Why? I mean, you were one, you’d know far more than me.” Kiaza frowned at him. “Nassau always said angels got a raw deal, that there was a power who called itself ‘God’, even though such a thing is patently ridiculous. There are lots of Gods,” Kiaza explained, “I’ve even been unlucky enough to meet a couple… and I used to think Sathriel was scary! Anyway, this God person recruited souls, just like we do, but instead of being able to create demons, he surrounded himself with angels and their whole purpose was to worship him. I always thought it sounded really rather dull. And of course, we all know you should never touch an angel.”

Lahja shuffled where he sat, and drew his hands back under the folds of the thick cloak Nassau had left him with. Lahja was not confident about walking the paths through hell, and hadn’t left the house without it covering his entire body. Kiaza noticed the gesture.

“But you’re not an angel any more. You’re a demon. And you’re not even like Jahke or Tobias, because they’re demons for sure, but they aren’t real demons. Nassau turned them because they wanted it. You weren’t turned.”

“I was damned,” Lahja muttered.

“That’s not what I meant. I just don’t get why you still have Heaven’s light if you’re not an angel. Nassau must figure it’s your power, which would explain why he wants me to train you.”

“What is your power Kiaza?” The fallen angel turned to look at his companion properly. Apart from use magic, which according to Shindae was ‘not a real power’, but fancy showmanship, Lahja hadn’t seen the snake with the green eyes do anything particularly special. He wasn’t like Vruuaska, whose control and delight of fire was palpable every time he breathed. The scaled boy smiled at him.

“You’re not going to like this.” Kiaza rolled his shoulders, and Lahja gaped as his iridescent scales melted away, replaced by smooth white skin, rather messy blond hair, and a face Lahja recognized as the one which stared at him from the mirror in his room. Kiaza’s eyes gave him away, acidic green and burning bright, but Lahja could barely tear his eyes away from the fact Kiaza was still only wearing an ankle length sarong, and lazed on the bench as though he was enjoying the warmth of the non-existent sun. Lahja had never dared to look at his own body, but the body he was looking at was Kiaza’s, and though the snake looked like him, he was still imbued with Kiaza’s lustrous confidence. When he opened his mouth, he spoke with Lahja’s own voice. “I can be anyone. It’s shockingly easy really. Sometimes it’s quite fun. Mostly I used to pretend to be human.”

“But...” Lahja felt around in his head for the shape of what he wanted to say. “How do you know who you really are?”

Kiaza laughed, and Lahja shivered all over. Chords had sounded in that laugh, his laugh. It reminded him of the million voices of the heavenly host.

“Every power is a gift, and a curse, some more obviously than others. I spent so long flickering through other people’s bodies I very nearly lost who I was. It’s why you need friends to remind you of everything. I had Nassau and Kiorl. Without them, I don’t think I’d be sitting here talking to you. Jin-Ha is an orator, he can convince anyone of anything; but the flip side is he can never be talked out of anything, even if he’s wrong, or even if it might hurt him. Nassau grants wishes, but he can’t grant them for himself.” Kiaza frowned, shivered, and became himself again. “Something we didn’t learn until it backfired in the most extraordinary manner. Your power comes with rather obvious drawbacks.”

“No one can ever touch me.” Lahja drew his feet up on the bench, hugging his knees. “I’ve never… ever… anything. Never touched anyone. Ever.”

“We’ll work on it. It’ll be alright.” Kiaza sounded like he believed himself, and Lahja found he did too. “You’ll see.”

“Do I really look like that?”

“Oh yeah. Trust me… everyone is going to love it when you finally get out of your shell.”

*

“You’re drunk.” Shindae stood, hands on his hips, fetlock deep in the ruins of what had once been some kind of house. It had been torn apart by magic and set on fire, so it was hard to tell exactly. Sitka was poking around in the ashes with a long stick, and fished out a broken wobbly green-glass jug. Whatever liquid had been in it was tainted with ashes and blood.

“Fuck off.” Kiorl’s speech was still crisp and distinct, but the major demon’s blue glare was blurry and very slightly pointing to the left of where Shindae stood.

“Ye Gods, has he been drinking this stuff? It smells like lighter fluid.” Sitka wrinkled his nose in disgust. “I know I like my food fresh, but even I don’t do that with intestines. Urgh.”

When Shindae and Sitka had reported to the office that morning, there had been a private missive waiting for them, directly from the palace. Whatever else had been scheduled, it was wiped clean, because their job was to get Upstairs and find the tiny town Kiorl had lain waste to. It wouldn’t normally have been such a bad thing, and death, destruction, and ungodly fear were all things the denizens of hell prized, but Kiorl had hardly been what even Inai might term as ‘careful’. Kiorl hadn’t used magic, or tried to contain the sphere of his destruction, and he’d been in the same place long enough for people to get away and start spreading the word. No one liked to be around when the angry mob with pitchforks and burning brands showed up.

Now the pair of minor demons stared at their inebriated friend and housemate, and tried to work out what to do.

“It’s not like I can just hoist him over my shoulder and carry him home,” Sitka growled in exasperation. “He’s way more powerful than we are. If he doesn’t want to come, I don’t see how we’re going to get him out of here.”

“Are we going to talk about the blood?” Shindae sighed.

“Such a waste.” Sitka’s love of blood was well known, but he preferred to drink it, rather than use it to paint the street. “I’m going to go start clearing up. I’m sure Vruu would like us to bring him some building materials back. I’ll pile the bodies and we’ll burn them too.” Sitka fixed his friend with hard onyx eyes. “You get to try and talk some sense into the cat.”

“Yay for me.” Wondering why he always seemed to get the short end of whatever straw was being passed around, Shindae paced back over to the slumped form of the demon, who was usually the most sleek and glossy in their residence. He’d seen Kiorl drunk before, seen him lust drunk and smeared with blood, see him growling in pleasure and ecstasy, but never had the major demon looked so lost and out of control. “Budge up there bud.” Shindae dropped down into the space next to Kiorl, and took the bottle which hung loosely from his fingertips. One sniff would be enough to fell an elephant, and he discarded it quickly before the panther noticed. “So, you wanna enlighten me about why you destroyed a whole settlement.”

“Why not?” Shindae hated that his friend didn’t sound drunk; it was incredibly unfair. “It’s what we do.”

“How many souls did you collect?” The emptiness was as good as an answer. “None? None! Do you know how much trouble other people get in when they lay waste to this much landscape without anything useful to show for it?” Shindae rolled his eyes. “C’mon, you gotta come home with us.”

“I’m gonna finish my drink.” Kiorl raised the bottle to his muzzle, but it wasn’t there. “Bugger.”

Sitka finished clearing up, tucked the Bag of Holding into one of his many belts, and supported Shindae as the fire demon set alight the piles he had made. Together, they steered Kiorl towards the place they’d crossed over. Sitka had a portal stone, and blew a kiss on its ultra-smooth surface as it began to glow fiercely. Moments later, they were back in hell, at the West Portal, and Kiaza was there to meet them.

“How’d you know?” Shindae asked, dusting dried blood from his hair.

“I’ve known him a lot longer than you have,” the snake sighed. “I’ll take him to the place to get cleaned up.”

“Sweet!” Sitka grinned like an overexcited child, and took off running.

“Where’re you goin’?” Shindae called after him.

“To go grab Jahke and get in the damn shower!”

Shindae shook his head as he started walking back to the office. At least one of them could keep their mind out of their crotch long enough to finish with paperwork.

“Sir!” The young ice elemental who’d been nominally on guard at the portal had started after him, and the big fire demon stopped and smiled. “Is it true? I heard someone say there was an angel in hell. Is it true?”

“Yes. There is a Fallen.” Shindae looked the boy up and down, remembering how it had been when Icean lived with them, how strange and wonderful it was to be touched by something so incredibly cold, when he himself was banked with inner fire. “He lives with us.”

“What’s he like sir?”

Shindae’s ego purred. He loved it when someone remembered he was actually high-ranking for a minor demon.

“Shy, but powerful. I’m sure you’ll meet him in time.” Shindae mauled the elemental with his eyes, knowing his arousal was becoming obvious. The ice demon glittered in reflected desire. “Why don’t you come along with me, and I’ll tell you all about it?”

Shindae grinned to himself as his new companion stepped alongside him, far too close to have been considered polite. The damn paperwork could wait, because Shindae couldn’t see any reason why only Sitka deserved to get happy fast.