Waiting Outside The Lines - 20. Chapter 20

I was addicted to the way that Greyson's plush lips connected to mine with such a naughty display of innocence. A playful contradiction that I still couldn't figure out, even after kissing him so many times before. One would think that you would get used to kissing someone like Greyson Chance...that the star struck fan in you would learn to just calm down and treat him like any other person once you got to know him personally. But the honest truth is...I was totally floored by him every time I saw him smile. I was still moved, almost to the point of tears, that he would even like boys in general...much less like 'ME', specifically. The very idea that I could come to this hotel room and just...hold him, and kiss him, and tell him he's beautiful...it was almost more than my fledgling emotions could bear on any given day. I had no precedent, no practice, with a love of this magnitude. A piece of me felt like it was tearing me apart. But another piece of me felt like it was finally making me whole. Both sides can't be right. I mean...can they?

As Greyson and I were kissing, our lips quietly smacking over the sound of the obligatory TV noise in the background...I decided to take both of my hands and run them under the elastic of his boxer shorts. Sliding them down the smooth globes of flesh until I was low enough to grab and squeeze a proper handful and pull him against me. However, Greyson had gotten so hard that his penis had worked its way out of the little slit in the front of his boxers, and was now rubbing against the front of my jeans. Primarily the 'zipper' part.

Instantly, Greyson gasped, and his hips jerked backward as he parted his lips from mine.

I was surprised by the sudden rejection, but was relieved to see him giggle sweetly in response to have his sensitive tip come into contact with something so harsh and rough. "Hehehe, WOW! You seriously need to take these off before we go any further! This is not a good time, right here!"

"Omigod! I'm sorry! Did I hurt you?" I grinned.

"Not...badly, no. But, yeah, you need to be more naked for this." He had the most genuine laugh of any boy that I had ever heard before. It truly came from his heart. It vibrated in his chest and made you feel warm inside. You never had to second guess its authenticity. He was always just as cheerful and as awesome as you would assume he would be in person. In a world full of fake celebrities and image consulted personalities...it was refreshing to know that sometimes, every once in a while...you can find someone who is everything you were promised they could be.

"Sorry." I giggled. "So...just the pants, or"¦?"

"Just the pants? Hehehe, what? Anything that you leave on, I'm just going to end up ripping off of you anyway. So you might as well cut to the chase, cutie." He told me. He looked so cute doing it that I kissed him on the lips again, even while he was still pushing his hips out to keep away from the iron torture device position right where his blushed, pink, and super sensitive, tip was located. He shook his booty a few times, and then pulled my hands out of his undies to tell me, "Take these off! Get comfortable, already. How long can you stay for?"

"Ten O'Clock. No questions asked. My mom kinda made me promise that I wouldn't give her a hard time." I said, wincing slightly.

"You shouldn't have given her a hard time LAST time, you goofball! Hehehe!"

"I didn't want to leave." I smirked.

"And I didn't want you to leave. But I didn't want you to get in trouble either. Then I couldn't see you."

"I know." I sighed. "I just...I don't like being away from you for any length of time. And when I get a chance to touch you again...it's hard to let go."

I can't say that I was being super romantic when I said it, but Greyson blushed bashfully and said, "Awwwww"¦"

It was a moment of irresistible cuteness that caused me to violently jerk forward and smash my lips against his again. I moaned because I kissed him so HARD! But Greyson eventually put his hands on my shoulders and pushed me back a little bit. His boyish grin was almost enough to draw me back in for more, but he kept me at arms length. Then...I happened to look down and see his hardness, still proudly sticking out of his boxers, throbbing along with his rapid heartbeat in lustful anticipation for my touch. His eyes were drawn down as well, and we shared a few stifled snickers over how incredibly excited he was down there! Hehehe! He flexed a bit to make it jump...just once, and my eyes widened with a smile.

"Hahaha! Come on, Evan! Are you gonna get naked or what? What's the magic word here? Abracadabra, open sesame!" He giggled. I was pulling my shirt off before he even finished asking the question, simultaneously using my feet to kick my shoes over to the side. Greyson turned and got on all fours on the bed, crawling over to the nightstand, and then he leaned over the side to fiddle with something.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm plugging my phone in. My battery's crazy low." He stretched for the outlet, which was just out of his reach. He kept sliding further forward, his cute little rump wiggling like a baby piglet in front of my ravenous eyes. I silently licked my lips as I watched his pert cheeks jiggle and shake with every movement, getting so hard that I completely forgot that I was supposed to finish taking my pants off. Even when Greyson reached the outlet and plugged his charger into the wall, I found it hard to pull my horny gaze away from it. "I always try to keep my phone charged to at least forty percent in case the studio calls or..." He looked back over his shoulder at me before stopping mid sentence. He smiled. "Are you staring at my butt?"

I had to snap out of it and put my brain back in working order. "Huh? No! Hehehe!"

"Yes you were. You were staring at my butt."

I tried to protest through a flurry of infatuated giggles. "Honestly, I wasn't."

"Well, why NOT? You're my boyfriend, aren't you? Technically, you're the only one who's really allowed to look at it." He said, and wiggled it temptingly for me to see.

"Goddammit, you're hot!" I laughed, and I yanked my pants down to the floor to step out of them, jumping onto the bed with him, wearing only a pair of boxer briefs and my white socks. Greyson immediately rolled over to spread his legs and invite me into his full body embrace. Our lips connected, tongues touching, arms and legs wrapped around one another. The need for sexual release was causing me to thrust my hips into his warm cradle, but it was the beauty and grace of his tender kiss that forced me to slow down and fully enjoy the moment. Sometimes Greyson smiles while he's kissing me. I just realized that. It's this really sweet, really sensual, smirk that usually causes me to sigh from the joy it brings me. I can feel the delightful change in his lips, and it always makes me smile too. Soft giggles follow shortly after, and I squeeze his body tight as I slowly hump myself into him, a surge of erotic tingles tickling me from the waist down. The feeling of my hardness lined up against his own, both shafts sliding back and forth against one another...it was enough to leave me totally breathless.

From the building urgency in our movements, it was becoming clear that this was going to be over much sooner than later if we didn't calm down. So I simply pressed myself down on him while catching my breath and kissing him with a little less intensity. I mean, it's not like we're only going to do this once tonight...but the first time is always the most...ummm...explosive. If you know what I mean.

Our lips disconnected, and I propped myself up on my elbows to look down upon my sweetheart and admire him for everything that he was. His eyes half closed, a dreamy smile, cute little nose...hehehe, it baffles me how I got lucky enough to be able to lay here almost naked with a boy of this caliber. It's crazy. I chuckled as I noticed that his hair all disheveled and out of place. Even when it's messy, it's still sexy. Maybe even more so.

"What are you laughing at?" He moaned, craning his neck up to kiss me again.

"Your hair, hehehe, it's all over the place."

"So? It's your fault it looks like this." He grinned.

"I know." I smiled. "Here, hold on..." I used my hand to try to press it down a little bit. I wasn't making my progress though. "I don't think I'm very good at this. Ooh, it's still a little wet..."

"Really? You're going to do this now? Will you leave my hair alone?" He chuckled. "I'll show you 'a little wet'..." He raised up a little and began to quickly shake his head back and forth. Hehehe, his hair wasn't wet enough to do much more than sprinkle me with a drop or two, but as he disoriented himself from the shaking...he accidentally got too close to me and we bumped our foreheads together. "Hahaha! Oh no!"

"Um...OWW!" I laughed.

"Baby, I'm sorry." He said, and grabbed me by the ears to pull my head down and kiss the sore spot. "All better?"

"Not yet, it isn't. No." I said, and he kissed it again. Then he kissed me on one cheek...then the other. I looked into his eyes, and gently rubbed my nose against his before kissing him on the lips again. The rhythmic humping of my hips driving me into him on instinct. But after another few minutes of us tongue kissing and rolling around, Greyson broke our intimate liplock again. This time, he was on top of me. I hadn't even realized that my hands had shamelessly rested on the tight young ass presented to me, squeezing it and mashing him into me by continuously pulling it forward. As he looked down on me with a smirk, both of us still breathing heavily from being so turned on, I took a moment to use my free hands to fully grope and knead the doughy buns behind him. I couldn't believe how addictively soft they were. The more I groped him, the harder I got. And Greyson's widening smile let me know that he was okay with this kind of thing. "Enjoying yourself? Hehehe!" He asked.

"You have no idea." I replied, gripping his cheeks even harder. "Damn..." Greyson closed his eyes and moaned happily, the sensual sound turning into a lighthearted giggle at the end.

With a brief peck on my lips, he said, "You know...I've been thinking about something. Just for curiosity's sake, I suppose."

"Yeah"¦?" I said quietly, kissing those perfect lips again.

"Uh huh. I was thinking about...you know...the other day."

"What other day?"

A gentle blush came to Greyson's face, and he seemed too shy to answer at first, but then rolled his eyes and said, "About...you know. I just...I can't stop thinking about...Chandler, you know? And Asa? That trailer?"

I don't know why, but it felt like my heart began to sink immediately after hearing him say that. It happened so fast that I couldn't even figure out why I felt so bad about it all of a sudden.

"Remember?" He asked.

"Oh." I said, quietly. "Yeah. I remember."

Why was he thinking about...them? That was the first question that my mind conjured up. I didn't even have enough of a chance to tell myself that I was being silly about the whole thing. My heart and mind were already skidding along the slippery emotional road and swerving out of control all on their own. I thought back to Asa and Chandler talking to Greyson on the set when I wasn't around, and them laughing together, and how aroused Greyson was while watching them have sex with each other. I thought about the way they kept asking me if Greyson ever wanted to come over and maybe join in the fun. I thought about the way they approached that Mingus boy on the set, and how much more...experienced and advanced they were when compared to my lame, near-virginal, approach to sex in general. Is that what Greyson prefers? Is that what he would rather have, instead of me coming over here for some teen boy kissing and scraping the tip of his penis with my zipper because I was too nervous to just strip down the moment I walked in the door?

You'd be surprised how many random thoughts and irrational worries can race through your mind at lightning speed in such a limited amount of time at this age.

"Well?" He asked, raising his eyebrows.

"Well...well what?" I said, still feeling that cold, dark, sensation of emptiness spreading out from my heart to envelop the rest of me as fast as it could.

"What did you...like...when we were there..." He stopped for a second, then said, "...I mean, what did you think about it?"

I felt confusion settling into our special moment. Something that was so natural and so automatic a few minutes ago was now causing my over active thoughts to scramble themselves and think about things in a manner that I was way too insecure to ever consider before. "I thought it was...ummm...cool?"

Greyson giggled, and gave me, yet another, kiss on the lips. "You are too cute! You know that?" He said. "What I'm saying"¦.well...like, what I mean is..." He stumbled over his softly spoken words for a bit, then asked me, "...In that situation...ummm...wait, let me rephrase that..." He looked away for a second, trying to find the right words to ask the right question. "...Like...if that was us...just you and me"¦?"

"Yeah?"

"Well...were you more focused on...no, wait. That's not right. What I'm asking you is..." He giggled again, but I think it was more out of nervousness than anything else. "...Were you more...ummm...looking at Chandler? Or at Asa? Or, better yet...if you had to 'choose' which one you wanted to be"¦who would you be?" He was really SHY about asking, but something finally clicked in my mind, and I think I was finally able to take the hint.

"Wait...is this, like...a 'top or bottom' question?" I asked.

Greyson's face turned SUPER red when I said that, and he looked away from me again, laughing to himself as the embarrassment of such a question washed over him. "Evan"¦.hehehe..."

"What? You mean, it's not?"

"Well...yeah. It IS. Kinda. Just, I wasn't gonna just come right out and say it like that!"

"Hehehe, sorry. Internet." I replied.

"...Well, whatever. Now that we got that out of the way...just...what were you thinking about at the time? If it was you, I mean."

I don't think that I had ever really thought about it before. Not to any extent to make a final decision, anyway. I barely knew enough to get me this far. I always pictured myself making love to another boy, and not the other way around. But...was that a conscious choice? Or was it just something that I saw in an online booty flick somewhere and decided that the 'top' guy was going to be the role I played in any kind of sexual hook up? I mean...do I have to really choose? Is there a standard? Is there a rule of law regarding this kind of thing?

Am I taking too long to answer him? What if he thinks I can't decide? What if I tell him what I like, and he doesn't agree? What if we both want the same thing? Or...ugh! Fuck! I don't know!!! But I had to say something, and since I was already grabbing two handfuls of his ass, I think I kind of knew what I wanted. I was just too afraid to say it out loud.

"Well...it doesn't matter. I mean...we're still talking butt stuff, right?" I asked.

"Hahaha! Yes, Evan. We're still talking butt stuff."

"Well, what do you want?" I asked, just to be safe.

"No fair. I asked you first." He giggled.

"I know, but still...who did you...I mean...which one do you think you wanted to be?"

Greyson sheepishly bit his bottom lip, and he said, "I dunno...I think..." He was looking me right in the eye, hoping to read my instant reaction to what he was going to say next. "...I think that I was kinda turned on by..." He made me wait. Breathlessly. Then he said, "...Chandler?" He phrased it like a question, but I could tell that he said exactly what he wanted to say.

My senses suddenly exploded with the idea that he would let me...ummm...that he'd actually want me to...ummmm"¦.

"Say something." He smiled.

"Oh. Yeah. That...that sounds awesome." Did I just say that sounded 'awesome'? That seems like a geeky thing for me to say. Give me a break. I'm still reeling from the idea that I might actually get the opportunity to slide myself deep inside the hole of another boy for the first time tonight. What is THAT going to feel like? I practically saw fireworks just from having him put me in his mouth! I can't even imagine anything feeling better than that.

"Ok." He said. "Cool." He lightly bit his bottom lip, and asked me, "That's ok, right? That I like what I like."

"...Yeah." I said, having to clear my throat when my vocal chords refused to produce any sound. "Yeah. Totally."

"M'kay. Just...when I think about us, that's usually how things end up. In my head, at least."

"I think the same goes for me. I suppose I like what I like too. If...you know, that's ok with you."

"Yeah. Totally." He grinned, and then he kissed me on the lips again before sitting up, still straddling my lap. He was low on my flat stomach, allowing my greedy hands to go right back to gripping the firm, round, mounds of his ass again. This time with a passion. He reached down to stroke himself slowly, one hand on my chest...and just as a dollop of sticky liquid began to cover his rosy tip with a glistening wetness, Greyson...very softly...asked, "Do you think you wanna try?"

"Right now?" Whoah. I don't know why I didn't expect that.

"...Uh huh..." He smirked. "I have some stuff to make things slip in easier. It's in my travel bag. I've only used it on my fingers before, but I'm pretty sure it works the same way if I smear it all over your..." Just then, Greyson's phone rang. I could have SCREAMED! "Hold on." Greyson said, shuffling off of my middle. "That's my sister's ringtone. I have to grab it."

To be totally honest, I probably should have been thankful for the temporary distraction. Not that I was scared or anything. Ok...so maybe I was scared! But, I mean, I DEFINITELY wanted to try this! I just...I needed a moment to catch my breath. I can't say that I was prepared for this sort of thing tonight. It seemed like such a huge leap forward. It was exciting, and thrilling, and almost enough to overwhelm me to the point of passing out.

And yet, at the same time, I wasn't quite sure that I knew HOW to make love to my new boyfriend yet. With everything just sort of racing along at it's own speed up to this point, I was just now realizing that I didn't have any...well, any 'moves' or anything. Now Asa? Asa Butterfield had moves. Moves, and positions, and hip circles, and probably an entire bag of tricks that I haven't even seen yet. And Chandler had probably done it with him enough times to really get into it with moves of his own. Everything they do is so HOT! But watching it, and doing it to someone else are two completely different things. What if I'm not as good? Or...what if I hurt him and he makes me stop? What if he hurts me and I make him stop? What if...ugh! Why can't I just turn my brain off??? Just ONCE!

Dangit! I KNEW I should have watched more porn! I could have been a pro at this kind of thing by now if I had just studied more porn!

Greyson got back on the mattress beside me, and giggled, "Look at my butt while I talk." Then grabbed my hands and put it on both cheeks as he lay on his stomach towards the foot of the bed. "Don't worry, babe. This is going to be really, REALLY, quick! Ok?"

Funny...I was just about to tell him the same thing when we were getting ready to have sex...