Barriers - 4. On My Way

My dart flickered against the wind as we drove down the highway. Familiar tunes played from Jon’s phone as we enjoyed the ride down. Astrin is exactly halfway between Scranton and Philadelphia and it ends up being an hour either way so I wasn’t sure why we were spending the night at his uncle’s place when we could just hang around my place and just head over whenever.

“You have like food allergies?” He asked as he looked over briefly. “I don’t want to bring you somewhere and you can’t eat anything.”

“Not that I know of. I’ve traveled a bit so you don’t need to worry about me being grossed out either.”

“Really? Where have you been?”

“The Caribbean, Germany, France, The Netherlands, The Greater UK of Course, Italy, Some Mexican tourist town I can’t be bothered to remember.” I rattled off the top of my head.

“Seriously?” He interrupted surprised. “What do your parents do for a living?”

“You want the full answer or the short one?”

“Short for now, I do wanna hear the full story at dinner though.”

“My ancestors owned a mine and a lot of farm land in Scotland dating all the way back to the 1800’s. My grandfather sold the land to the government after it became too much and they’ve been taking time to get the money out of the country. My dad was the first person to finally move to the States.”

“So is that why your uncle is still over there? He’s handling the rest of the money over there?”

“I don’t like to talk about business with my relatives. It’s really daunting to think that I have to inherit all of it one day.” I answered.

“Does your uncle have a family of his own?” He understandably followed up.

“Well I mean, he just turned thirty and he’s gay too so I don’t see that happening any time soon. My grandmother harasses him about it daily but he seems to be taking his time….”

“Woah woah woah.’ He interrupted while turning off the highway. “Your uncle is THAT good looking AND he’s gay?”

“Get your mind out of the gutter.” I said rolling my eyes. “Him and his husband said they wanted to go through a surrogate but they want to live a little longer before they do that.”

“Finally here.” He stated relieved as he parked in a driveway next to a townhouse. “I wanna get out of these gym clothes and take a shower. I feel gross.”

“We have this place all to ourselves?” I asked confused. I figured his uncle lived in an apartment complex or something smaller.

“Yeah, this was pretty much my second home growing up. I haven’t been here in a couple of years. I wonder what my uncle did to change up the place.” He opened the door and held it out for me.

The entry floor was as I expected it to be. A standard couch with an analog tv facing it, behind it a decent sized kitchen. I walked further in to find a spiral staircase leading both up and downstairs and settled on the couch as Jon went to the fridge to inspect the contents.

“I figured he cleaned it before he left.” He said dismissively. “Did you want to come downstairs with me and see where we’re sleeping tonight?”

“I guess.” I shrugged.

“Don’t laugh alright?” He asked as we made our way down. “It’s gonna be ultra-cheesy but I had no say in it.”

He wasn’t wrong. One side of the room we entered was a bunch of his accolades from his early years framed. The other half of it was a bunch of athlete posters and Ohio State University memorabilia. I found myself chortling after taking it all in which elicited a groan out of Jon.

“Come on. The Ohio state stuff is my fathers. He graduated from there.” He pointed to the diploma. “If you think this is bad, you should see whats in my basement. So many stupid second place trophies.”

“It’s your place.” I responded holding back my laughter.

‘Whatever.” He said as he opened the door to the bedroom. This room looked normal. A king sized bed, two closets and some nightstands filled the room. On the right was a door to what I assumed would be the bathroom which Jon was making his way over to after he pulled out a bag of toiletries. “I’ll be quick. Just like chill out.” He pointed to the tv remote and closed the door soon after.

I threw my bag next to his and decided to take another look at the trophy room. From what I know about the athletics program at Wilson High, it isn’t exactly a winning program. The run that Jon had last year was considered a miracle. This was proven by the fact that a lot of his trophies were lower placements. It’s actually pretty admirable how despite how mediocre he was at it, he still kept trying and he finally found success. Meanwhile I’m giving up on the guitar because it’s kind of difficult.

The wall to the bedroom had a couple of pictures of the family. The picture that stood out the most was a younger Jon smiling wide as his dad held a trophy above his head with both of them proud of the accomplishment. It must be life shattering for that kind of support to just vanish from your life, even all these years later.

I thought back to my family situation and I got a chill. I didn’t have these memories. My childhood was just a blur of being passed around from one person to the next. I don’t think it was that my father despised me or anything, he just didn’t know what to do with me. You could ask my father to solve any logistics problem in the world and he’ll come up with an answer in half of a day but ask him how to raise a kid? Good luck with that.

After a few more looks around the room to get to know Jon I walked back into the bedroom to find him with nothing on but a pair of boxer briefs and a tooth brush in his mouth as he went through his bag.

My eyes went to the obvious place immediately as I stood in place. The navy fabric stretched perfectly over his defined legs and his round muscular ass. His stomach was much more defined since I had last seen them in march, most notably his sides were tighter. The only hair on his body was on the top of his head which was still wet and glistened against the light coming from the bathroom.

He didn’t notice my gawking until he found the clothes he was looking for. Once he saw me, he winked as he threw the clothes on the bed and went back into the bathroom to spit out the tooth paste. “Like what you see?”

“I…” I stammered as I was left speechless at the sight in front of me.

“Come here.” After throwing his shirt on he grabbed my hand and put it on the small of his back as he brought me in closer. “Take a feel.” He demanded has he moved closer to me.

“Jon…” I continued to not be able to get a coherent thought out of my mouth.

“How do I get you to relax?” He asked before moving in closer to kiss me on the lips twice. My hands tensed and eyes went wide. “That’s not it.” He said chuckling before grabbing my ass and giving it a good squeeze.

“Uhh...” I moaned quietly, unable to ignore the growing member protruding out of Jon’s boxers.

“That’s not it either. Hmm…” He thought out loud before massaging the back of my neck. This got me to close my eyes and take a deep breath. “There we go.”

“Come on Jon stop. You know I’m new to all of this.” I begged finally able to get a word out.

“Oh I know. I’m just having my fun now.” He kissed me once more before moving to my ear. “When you’re ready, I’m going to make sure you never forget your first time.”

My eyes shot open as he backed away and went to throw on his Jeans winking one more time before sliding them on.

“Babe, I’m joking. It’s just exciting for me a dumb as it is.” He shrugged before throwing on his shirt.

“Stop calling me babe. Where are we going?” I asked as he opened the front door for me.

“There’s a great spot three blocks down I wanna show you. I figure we’ll get dinner and walk around with bubble tea before it gets too cold.”

“So this is Chinatown I take it then?” I asked oblivious to all the signs and architecture.

“Yup. My other family’s restaurant is actually in the suburbs. No reason to compete in this area according to my uncle. I’m not taking you there, I’m taking you to this fusion spot that i’ve been craving for some time.”

“Sure…” I said looking around as we left the house.

“There’s a record store over there if you wanted to check it out after dinner.” He pointed to a store on our right as we crossed onto the second block.

“Honestly, the only thing that’s on my mind right now is a nice cold beer.” I thought out loud. “Wonder if I can get one around here.”

“Yeah, I was hoping my uncle would of left some liquor in the fridge but he cleaned it out.” Jon answered with a downward inflection. “Maybe he has some bottles upstairs, I didn’t check.”

“I have a fake. I just don’t like to use it outside of music halls because it never fucking works.” I barely look sixteen let alone eighteen so without bad lighting it’s pretty easy to tell that I’m lying.

“Yeah. We’ll figure something out.” He said as he opened the door to the place.

“Jon!” was the only word I understood as he in the hostess went back in forth in their native tongue. He pointed to me a few times and her eyes went wide for a second before laughing. After I was thoroughly embarrassed, she lead us to a table in the back. They talked about what I assumed was the food and she walked away soon after.

“All taken care of and She thinks you’re adorable” He said once she was out of earshot. “I know you’re wondering.”

“You two know each other?” I asked.

“Everyone knows each other because we all buy from the same food sources. I was telling her how we’re here for your birthday and if the food sucks I’ll never live it down.” He joked as he leaned back. “I got everything I think you would like. Fried Shrimp balls, Barbeque Pork Chops, Some Flatbread and Curry.”

“Doesn’t sound like I would hate anything there.” I responded.

“Cool. Can I ask a couple of questions? You can tell me if you don’t want to answer any of them.” He asked.

“I guess.” I obliged as I tensed up a bit.

“Is Jenna seriously the only person you talk to in school?”

“No, Steven Walker and I get along. He wanted me to go to his battle of the bands tonight actually.”

“He plays in a band?”

“I know he plays the guitar, I didn’t know he had a band until this morning.”

“There’s serious nobody else?” He asked amazed.

“I probably couldn’t even name ten people in our class Jon. I seriously don’t care about anything that happens in school.” I answered annoyed.

“Alright.” He surrendered the point putting up his hands. “It’s just impressive you’ve managed to be so detached from school. It can get pretty crazy sometimes/”

“It helps that I’m not around for holidays. I usually take off the week of Thanksgiving and Christmas and easter.” I said after thinking a bit. “Last time we went to Florida and that was a terrible time.”

“Huh, you’re right. You’re always gone the week before.” He thought out loud as he realized we shared classes for the past 3 years. “I didn’t really think about it till now. That means your family is close right?”

“Nah.” I scoffed immediately. “They’re all concerned with how much money they make. What do you want to know about exactly? My coward of a father? The constant bickering my mother and uncle do?”

“All of the above. You’re like a Hilton from what it sounds like.” He answered as he sipped his water.

“I’ll tell you about my parents today. You’ll meet my uncle at the end of the month if we last that long.”

“Wait. He’s coming here? I thought he was stuck in Scotland.” He asked confused.

“He said something about holiday. It doesn’t make any sense honestly. The Andrews never take a day off. It’s why I never actually see anyone of authority, they’re too busy working.” I rolled my eyes at the absurdity of my upbringing.

“Well shit. Now I want to know about your uncle.” He said worried.

“Tough. Anyways, my dad graduated at the top of his class at Stanford.”

“You’re seriously going to just…” He attempted to interrupt.

“He took some job in silicon valley after he graduated despite my grandfather’s protests and that’s when he met my mother.” I continued on. “My uncle says she only married him for his connections, but they’re still together after twenty five years so like I doubt it.”

“Yes your uncle. He…”

“Yeah he told me they didn’t plan to have me. They found out too late along and I kind of just came into existence.” I finished as he scratched his head in frustration. “Oh hey the foods here.”

“I’m gonna get you later.” He said shooting daggers with his eyes as the waitress put the food at the table.

“Sure you will.” I chuckled. “Fried shrimp balls huh?” I asked as I popped open a pair of chopsticks and pinched one before taking a bite. “Damn, that IS good.”

“Here try the pork chops. They’re the most popular among the guys.” He passed me a plate with a little bit of everything on it.

I took a bite and my eyes went wide. “I can see why.”

He laughed as he went for a bite of his own. “You really are so different when you’re distracted from your thoughts.”

“What do you mean?” I asked as I took a drink of water.

“This is the most I’ve gotten you to talk since we started talking.” He noted. “A lot of people would like you if they knew you were actually like this.”

“I think you’re just infatuated with me.” I said after taking another bite and pointed my chopstick at him. “I could probably go scream bloody murder on the side of the street and you would think it’s funny instead of insane like a normal person.”

“We have got to work on this whole self-confidence thing.” He said shaking his head. “Anyways, anything you wanna ask me?”

“Sure. What’s with you and Ken Wilker? Jenna thought you two were dating when you started sniffing around me.” I asked bluntly.

“Sniffing? She and I need to have a few words when we get back. Kenny and I met at a summer basketball camp. He was this really shy kid in my cabin and we ended up meshing really well. As for the whole dating thing…well everyone thought he was the one into dudes but he’s just a dopey virgin. I could never date Ken. He’s definitely more like a brother to me. He really is a great guy, I hope everything works out for him.” As Jon continued going on about his friend, I sensed a bit of concern. “He has a lot of attention on him right now because he got us to the Finals so it’s looking pretty good for his future.

I was torn. It was nice to hear Jon talk about his best friend but at the same time I couldn’t help but think of all the experiences I missed out on because I couldn’t keep my fucking mouth shut.

“We have scouts coming in a couple of weeks. I’m so nervous.” He continued scratching the back of his head. “Ken can’t afford college without a scholarship and his parents are on hard times right now. I try and help him out where I can but this is it. I just hope we can perform and stick together.”

“What do you mean stick together?” I asked.

“I have this dream of going to OSU like my dad. It would be awesome to play ball over there with Kenny. I don’t think it’ll happen because we aren’t that great but maybe…” He shook his head and smiled gently. “Here.” He put the last piece of meat on one of the plates. “It’s rude for me to finish it. We’ll take everything else to go for tonight.”

“Oh right. What do I owe?” I asked as I pulled out my wallet.

“This is all on me.” He said confidently grinning.

“Absolutely not.” I retorted putting my foot down. “I’m no freeloader.”

“It’s your birthday. You missed it but I slipped her the hostess my card before we got seated and we’re all paid up.” He continued to grin as he was incredibly satisfied with himself. “Go smoke. I got it.”

“Whatever.” I spit out before walking away.

As I was finished up my smoke, I saw Jon making his way to the front with two bags an older guy who I assumed was the owner. Jon bowed before the door was held open and they exchanged their goodbyes.

“Can’t wait to wake up and eat this tommorow.” He said shaking one bag.

“We had enough leftovers to need two bags?” I asked confused.

“Nah. Let’s get back to the house. Did you want dessert?”

“Nah I’m good. I could kill for a beer though.” I answered with a stretch and a groan as we approached his street.

“Fair enough. Hey can you grab some orange juice from the store?” He nudged his head to the store across the street. “I would but ya know.”

“Sure. I need smokes anyways.” I obliged as I walked across.

“Thanks! Meet you back at the house.” He said before moving a little too fast. He’s clearly up to something but I figured it was harmless to let him be dumb.

I walked into the store, picked up the jug of OJ and handed my ID with a twenty. “Can I get a pack of Menthols too please? Keep the change.”

The clerk laughed and looked at my id, clearly for shits and giggles. “Come on kiddo. You don’t look a day over sixteen.”

“Go ahead and scan it then.” I demanded offended. I paid an extra hundred for the dumb thing to scan and believe me when I say it paid for itself quickly.

“Sorry kiddo. No dice.” He handed me back my fake with the change for the OJ. “You really shouldn’t be smoking at such a young age anyways.”

I stomped out of the store angry as fuck. I had like 4 darts left in my pack and I was kicking myself for not grabbing another one before we left. I wanted to light one up right then and there but I needed to make it through at least the next day. I attempted to cool myself off before I made it back to Jon’s place but realized that Jon didn’t keep the door unlocked and got more frustrated.

“There you are!” He shouted from his roof top.

“The fuck are you doing up there?” I asked confused.

“You’ll see! Be right down!” He shouted before disappearing only to reappear in front of me in 20 seconds.

“Is this why you ran off when I got this stupid thing?” I asked as I threw the juice in the fridge.

“You ok?” He asked concerned and he wrapped his arms around my chest. “I thought we were off to a good start here.”

“The guy at the store wouldn’t take my fake. I have no smokes left.” I complained as he guided me up the stairs.

“I’m sure you can buy some off someone tommorow.” He said assuredly.

“He had no reason to tell me no.” I huffed.

“No reason? Jason, you look like you’re sixteen.” He laughed as he opened the door.

I was going to argue but then I saw what was in front of me and shut up. Jon had set up a couple of blankets on a bench in front of an unlit fireplace and a speaker playing music.

“I’ve been caught.” He joked as he released me and walked over to a bag next to the bench. “You think this will calm you down a bit?”

“A beer? Where did you..”

“Remember that 2^nd bag I was holding?” He answered raising his eyebrow. “Come here. Take a drink while I light the fireplace up.”

“You’re too much.” I said as I walked over and took the can out of his hands. “Thank you.”

He leaned in to kiss me quickly before going back to the fireplace. I shook my head and opened the beer and watched him to try and figure it out. He started by trying to light a stick and holding it against a log but that wasn’t working so he then attempted to find multiple sticks to light them and throw them into the pit. When those burnt out before they hit the bottom I chuckled and walked over.

“You have to start it with some kindling.” I grabbed the newspapers under a table he chose to ignore and crumbled them up and threw them at the bottom of the pit. “Now we can use the stick.”

“Look at you, knowing how firepits work.” He complimented as he lit another stick and used it to light up the papers.

“My uncle has one at his place and he uses it a lot during the summer.” I walked back to my beer and sat on the bench before he nearly made another mistake. “Make sure that first log catches fire before you let go of it.”

“Impressive.” He said as he followed direction. He threw the last log in looking smug and walked over for a beer of his own and joined me. The heat looked great and felt even better against the cold cityscape. I was captivated by it for a minute before he surprised me by putting my head on his lap and turning my face to look up at him.

“What?” I asked as he grinned and ran his fingers through my hair.

“I really think you’d look better with a haircut but it’s not that important. Whatcha thinking about?” He asked back before sipping on his beer.

“How I wish I had a smoke.” I answered honestly.

“I set this up for you and all you can think about is a smoke.” He pretended to be offended.

“Don’t think it’s a fault with you.” I added as I turned my head.

“Babe, I’m joking.” I heard above me as I tried to bottle up my feelings.

I told him I knew as I looked back at the fire. What Jon had done for me already was incredible and we had only been here for three hours. I’d imagine he’d have anyone else exactly where he wanted them at this point but here I was still resisting his advances. I focused in the music playing. The tone of the piano soothed me as we stayed silent.

“Sing like you think no one's listening

You would kill for this

Just a little bit

Just a little bit

You would”

“I love your voice.” Jon said breaking me out of another trance.

“Huh?” I shot up shocked.

“You were singing softly to yourself there.” He continued unphased as he grabbed my hand. “It’s probably my favorite thing about you.”

“Sorry, I just get lost in my thoughts…” I apologized as I got up.

He chuckled before brushing the hair away from my face. “Why are you saying sorry? I just told you I love hearing it.”

“I don’t know.” I said as I continued to struggle to contain my embarrassment.

“Stop thinking then. Just enjoy it all.” He leaned in. “I don’t want anything except for you to enjoy yourself.”

I wanted to respond but he kept moving in closer so I was at a loss for what to do. It felt like a century as he moved in slowly, wanting to make sure I was ok with what was about to happen. Eventually he grabbed the back of my neck and massaged it like he did before and took advantage of my open mouth and dove in.

Jon is so firm and confident when he kisses me this deep. His tongue lead me along as he tried to break me from my shocked state and join him in the bliss of the moment. I closed my eyes and let him work his magic. The further I found myself falling back, the heavier he got. As my back hit the bench, he growled before collapsing on top of me and going all in.

He began grinding his body on me are he assaulted my mouth. His hands were feverously grabbing part of my body they could get ahold of and his tongue died the same with my mouth. The friction was something I had never experienced before in my life and I was unable to control myself as I succumbed to the heat of the moment. This went on for several minutes until my leg twitched and hit something causing it to fall on the ground.

“What was that?” Jon asked as he looked behind him.

“I don’t know.” I responded out of breath as I squeezed out from under him to get a better look.

Jon fixed himself as I took my phone and turned on the flashlight to find out what happened. He laughed when he found it. “You knocked over my beer.”

“Shit. Sorry.” I apologized as I looked around for a towel.

“It’s fine.” He assured me as he looked at the slowly dimming fire pit before picking it up. “I’ll dry out let’s not worry about it.”

“Are you sure? Because I don’t want your uncle to come back to a stain…”

“Jason.” He said stopping me and getting back in my face again. “It’s fine.”

“Oh….ok..” I stammered as he moved back in closer. ‘Can…we not do that again?”

“You ok?” He asked concerned as he stopped his approach.

“Yeah.” I said still catching my breath trying to stop my heart from racing. “I enjoyed it…it’s just I need a break.”

“Fair enough. Do you want to go downstairs?” He asked as he got up.

“No…” I answered

“Ok cool. Lemme throw more wood in.” He said as he went up and around. I threw a second blanket on as he made his rounds before looking at me in satisfaction and coming back over. I nestled myself under his arm as he other arm typed away.

“Who you talking to?” I asked trying to look.

“Kenny. He’s asking how it’s going. I’m telling him to buzz off cuz it’s none of his business.” He answered lightheartedly.

“You two are way too close.” I commented as I closed my eyes and rested on his chest.

“Everyone needs a ride or die.” He said shrugging. “I wouldn’t be half of the person I am with him and im sure he feels the same way.”

I didn’t respond as I turned my head and looked back at the fire.

“God it feels so fucking good to be away from everyone!” He shouted as he stretched out.

I got up and let him go on his rambling.

“I already feel it, this seasons gonna fucking suck. Ben’s asleep at the wheel and Erics mind is on girls. I got Kenny at the helm but the poor guy can only do so much considering everything that’s going on. I guess I need to step up in practice but man I’m just so tired all the time. He got up and walked around the fire leaving me alone. “I’d stop giving a shit if it didn’t matter so much for Kenny but this is what I signed up for and we need to see it though.”

I looked at him as he paced nervously and couldn’t help but laugh at the problems I wished I had. He looked out of sorts from the Jon Han that I had come to know. It was a combination of him trying to look as good as he could in front of me and my utter obliviousness to anything that wasn’t spelled out for me. I thought back to what he said about how he was glad that I wasn’t a part of the high school drama that was his daily life and I realized that while that was going to change, if I really wanted to be with him then I needed to be that escape that he desperately needed.

“Come here.” I said as he thought about putting more wood into the pit.

“You ok?” He asked as he came over. Damn, I really had been such an ignorant piece of shit. Despite all of the shit that was on his mind he still managed to put me first.

I felt a second of hesitation as I ventured into unknown territory but I knew I needed to push through. As he knelt down to look me in the face I leaned over to kiss him catching him by surprise. I couldn’t help but smirk before going back in for another. It was fun having Jon confused, he had these adorable puppy dog eyes as he tries to figure out what is going on.

“Thank you.” I said as I stepped into being a bit more confident with him. “You do too much you know. I don’t know how you’re actually so strong.”

“What do you mean?” He asked trying to figure out where this sudden burst of confidence came from.

“You talk about how you could do more when you’re already doing so much. You nearly collapsed from stress in front of my eyes.” I started. “On top of all of that you brought me here to a weekend that I would enjoy and have been waiting on me nonstop since we left.” I kissed him one more time for good measure. “You don’t think about yourself.”

“I can’t think about myself. Everyone’s depending on me.” He sighed looking away.

“Jon.” I demanded his attention once again. “We are here to relax. I’m certainly not going to be able to if you’re like this.”

“When did you become such a smartass?” He asked as he butted into my head.

“I just thought about stuff.” I said confidently. “You truly have gone far and beyond what you’ve needed to do with me and I should be a lot more grateful than I have been.”

“You just keep surprising me.” He grinned. “I just had this feeling that nobody knew who you really were and I have to say I’m pretty happy with where I spent my time this past year.”

“You would ruin the moment huffing yourself up.” I scoffed breaking contact and getting up. “The fires dying again let’s just go downstairs.”

“Whatever you want babe.” He said far too full of himself.

He started cleaning up as I lit a smoke and poked around the fire pit to make sure it was completely dead. I attempted to help with the cleaning but he was adamant he had it as he made his way down for the first time. Once I was satisfied with my dart and the pit I met him at the door and he grabbed me like he always does and walked me down gnawing at my neck

“You’re too much.” I said trying to break off from him. “You’re like a cat.”

“Lion.” He said continuing on as we made our way into the kitchen. “I’m gonna protect you with everything that I have.”

“How corny.” I finally managed to break free. “Were you always this affectionate with all those girls you’ve dated?”

“Who says I’ve dated anyone?” He asked right back as he went for a glass of water.

“You’re going to tell me that not a single girl you’ve slept with managed to tie you down?” I asked crossing my arms in disbelief.

“Correct.” He said confidently grinning. “You really don’t have a clue about school huh?”

“What do you mean?” I asked getting more impatient with the conversation.

“Babe. I was known for sleeping with whoever I wanted and never committing. I broke a couple of girls hearts and nothing ever satisfied me.” He laughed thinking about it all. “That’s why everyone was so damn confused when I started up with you.”

“So you mean to tell me that I’m..”

“The only person I have ever dated. You are correct.” He grinned before turning around to rinse his cup.

“I have no idea what I’ve gotten into with you have i?” I asked as I walked downstairs.

“Nope. To be fair I don’t either. I’ve just been playing it by ear.” He admitted as he followed.

“I’m sure you’ve worked out the details. Surely everything you’ve done up to now wasn’t thought of on the spot.”

“You know what I mean.” He said as I opened the door to the bedroom. “Kenny figured out the details for me but I have no end game with you and I must say I like it that way.” I heard his phone ring more than once as I relieved myself in the bathroom. “Speak of the devil. Whats up ken? No, he’s in the bathroom. She what? “

I went to my bag and pulled out my toothbrush as Jon went on with his best friend about the interworking’s of the school ecosystem. I had plenty of time to brush my teeth and wash my face before leaning in the doorway waiting for him to be done.

“What are you even doing tonight anyways?” He asked Ken. “Doesn’t your dad usually take her on Saturdays? Ah, another one. That sucks. Ok bro, Jason’s staring at me ai really have to go. Tell your mom I’m sending good vibes. Love you bro.” He hung up the phone and looked exacerbated.

“Being the point guard on one of the more successful school programs really isn’t all it’s chocked up to be is it?” I asked as I made my way over to him.

“I’m here to relax. I’m here to relax.” He attempted to tell himself as walked over and kissed him on the cheek.

“Whats on the agenda for tommorow?” I asked as I hopped in bed as he realized he hadn’t brushed his teeth and made his way over to the bathroom.

“Early lunch at the restaurant and then fuck around until doors open.” He said before starting to brush.

“Sounds nice.” I said as I looked over my phone for the first time in several hours to find myself once again inundated with friend requests. “I’m gonna delete facebook. This is too much and I don’t actually care.”

“What do you mean?” I asked ineloquently with a mouth full of toothpaste.

“Everyone’s adding me because they know we’re dating. It’s annoying.” I said looking over at him.

Jon immediately looked at me through the mirror with wide eyes and spit out the toothpaste and washed his mouth a bit too quickly.

“What?” I asked knowing something was up.

“You said it!” He pretty much shouted as he nearly sprinted onto the bed going back to assaulting me.

“What are you on about?” I asked once again as he straddled me and kiss me on the lips.

“You said we’re dating.” He stated confidently as he leaned in close. “I finally got you.”

“You’re too fucking much.” I scoffed not wanting to admit he was right.

“You love it.” He stated kissing my on the cheek.

“Even if I did, it’s still a bit on the nose.” I said managing to turn my eyes towards him as the residual embarrassment wore off.

“I could fucking devour you right now and make you feel incredible if you wanted.” He responded not holding any context back.

“Can….can we just chill?” I asked timidly as he growled making it crystal clear what his intentions were.

“Oh.” He said as if he snapped out of his trance. “Yeah. Of course. Sorry.” He got off me and took off his clothes leaving him in his boxer briefs before sliding under the sheets.

I groaned as I got comfortable on him. Knowing about his “experience” in the bedroom was daunting to say the least. I didn’t even know I wanted up until now so I didn’t want him thinking that I was ready.

“Don’t say it.” He stopped me. “I get it. You wanna go slow.” He leaned back and put his arms over his head. “I can wait.”

“But you used to…”

“I actually haven’t since you left for Scotland.” He shrugged knowing I was talk about his sexual activity. “I don’t know. Just all kinda lost it’s luster.”

“I hope you realize you make no fucking sense.” I said annoyed that he had me pinned down so well.

“Come here.” He grabbed me despite my protests. “I know I have my reputation but it’s just not a priority anymore.”

“Come on you can’t just expect me to believe that. ”

“You know how I told you before that Kenny’s seriously depending on my to perform? Well, it’s not just that. My mom is like ten years older than your parents. She wants to retire and go back home to China after I graduate. They expect me to inherit the business and I don’t really have much of a say in it.” He groaned in frustration as he opened up to me. “I don’t want to bum people out but I have like five years tops before I’m running the show for myself and it’s really scary to think about.”

“Sorry for teasing you…” I said gripping him tight.

“You don’t get upset when I bum you out.” He continued on before kissing my on the forehead. “You don’t make me feel like a loser when I open up. I get it. Nobody wants to hear about this shit when we’re this young but it’s my reality.”

“I don’t know what you’re going through though…” I responded. “I’m just as fortunate as the rest of them…even more so actually.”

“But you still care enough to try and understand and that’s what matters. For now, at least.” He chuckled before kissing me and grabbing the remote. “I’m done being sad when it’s about to be your birthday. Let’s just watch something and get some sleep. Thanks for listening.”

I gripped him tighter as he found some awful action movie to put on. I didn’t pay much attention to the movie as my mind was racing. Jon continued to accelerate our relationship and it was a lot to process. I always thought he had it so easy. I thought about his friends, his status in school and his attitude and he just seemed like everyone else. Never in a million years would I have thought he had this much on his mind.

The weirdest part of it was how he obligated himself to help his best friend. Despite it being a major point of stress in his life, he still was willing to go far and beyond for his best friend when his best friend needs the help.

Yet here he was with me. It’s not like I was ignoring what he was saying. His friends don’t wanna hear about his problems and at least I was willing the sympathize but even then I’m sure he could find someone...I have to stop. I need to break out of this cycle of thought. He did all of this for me. The least I can do is try and be happy, at least for the weekend.

I looked up at him as he watched the movie and he looked down and kissed me on the forehead once again. I giggled as a little making him just a little bit happier and decided that would be enough for the night and closed my eyes and fell asleep in the arm that was getting a little too comfortable with. He’s so perfect. I’m gonna find a way to fuck this up somehow.