Poems by Blue - 5. Jeremy Dominguez

Jeremy Dominguez

In dreams, nothing is real
But no one minds, because nothing is believed
He likes it there, deep in dreams,
Because nothing there can hurt or shock him
But soon, he’ll awake;
Not for long can he hide in comfort.
The wake, it comes. Now.

Brown eyes open to the strands of Michele Branch
A hand, equally brown, neither tanned nor not,
Hits the clock, ending the music.
He pauses, sighs, then he moves.

A tall, slender body, a study of in-betweens
Moves naked towards the shower.
Not ugly, not beautiful,
But both at once somehow;
He thinks himself as nothing.

He showers and shaves, as he does every day
Not being born white enough to avoid a beard.
Besides, today’s a special day
21, and off to cocktails after class
With a friend, who’ll have a friend in tow
To help him “do his birthday right.”
He smiles, thinking as he dresses in black
Casual yet stylish in cloth so soft
It begs to be touched.
He looks it over, approves, and adds a charm
-a silver ankh to hang around his neck-
“Death on my birthday” he says out loud.
He leaves, ready to knock them all dead.

Classes aren't as long as they feel- they can't be
there aren't that many hours in even a week.
After eternity, they end. His cell phone warbles
as he walks two stone steps at a time to the path
"Time to party Jere. Hurry up, we're waiting."

Drew: Bold, gorgeous, and above all else alive
Greets Jere with a gentle kiss and a knowing smile
"Happy birthday." He says. "Come. Meet Josh."
Jere lets himself be led through the smoky bar by Drew
with the iron grip and whose lips taste like vodka
Jere's amused by it all until he sees Josh
and his smile melts away like summer frost
"Hot as fuck, isn't he" says Drew not noticing the shock
that forces Jere to stare and stop and think:
Hot does not do justice to Josh.

Josh hugs Jere as if he owns him
"Happy birthday Jeremy. Long time no see."
Jere does not hug him back- instead he thinks
Long time, yes, but not nearly long enough.
Jere tries to respond, but finds he has nothing to say
So Drew speaks instead, "Do you two know each other?"
"We've met." says Josh, "We shared some classes back in high school."
We shared a little more than that thinks Jere.
Images of hugs, of holding, and of nights alone together
Chases punches, and fighting, and that final goodbye
that never got to happen.
Not nearly long enough.
They stand blinking at one another
until Drew gets some drinks and raises one glass high
"To the evils of alcohol. Let's get smashed."
Jere downs his whole glass without spilling a drop.

Hours pass, and Jere stumbles home
supported on either side by beauty
He does not answer the call of sleep,
for his mind is teeming with words and rhymes
that demand to be put to page
So instead of sleeping, he pours some wine.

With a lit cigarette and a glass in one hand
He steps onto his balcony to clear his head
and to be lost in memories

"How could you Josh" he says out loud
too drunk to care if he's overheard.
"How could you come into my life?
Just as I'm starting to forget you
why do you come back to haunt my dreams?
Why did you remind me how much I love you,
and how little I care about what you've done?
And how dare you change into a man
without me there to keep you safe.
How do you look so young and well,
while I'm fading away to dust?"

Poetry is scribbled out on napkins
which are quickly daubed away
catching tear drops as they tumble.
Ash falls, wine spills, but he doesn't notice.

Near dawn, he falls to sleep still dressed
exhausted by his drunken creative ecstatic fit.
Tomorrow doesn't exist right now,
he's safely back into his dreams
about a boy that he once knew
that he grew to love
and that loved him back.
Happy memories,
before they both grew up.

Tommorow, when Josh calls,
It will seem as if the years apart between them
will fade as quickly as a dream.