Summer's too Cold - 11. Chapter 11 - MaGiCaL

I had been crying all night. And all morning. It was eight in the evening, and I’d received about seventeen texts from Nicole, fifteen from Bells and sixteen from Ana. Obviously no one in my family seemed to care. My parents might have, but maybe they were lost in this maze of a house. And still the tears still didn’t stop. Like diffusion. Yes, Jesse, amazing time for a biology joke. And talking to yourself… getting crazier by the minute, are we? Ugh. STOP. RIGHT. NOW!

I got off the warm, comforting bed to play some slow song, and then take a shower. I played “Jar of Hearts” by Christina Perri and headed towards the bathroom, my eyes still pouring.

As soon as I came out of the shower, I dropped onto my bed and fell right to sleep, my mind wandering off to dystopia, or well, my world. My very own, personal hell. I was like that for quite some days. I never left my room, cried a lot, and listened to depressing, sad, emotional songs. After what seemed like a year, I stopped crying. And called up Nicole. And at the first ring…

“WHAT THE FUCK DUDE?! I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO CALL YOU AND HAVE BEEN TEXTING YOU FOR THE PAST FUCKING WEEK!!! WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN?!” her voice blasted through the phone, almost bursting my eardrums. Try having someone scream at you after a week of hearing nothing but your own sobs, and soft, slow songs. My mind suddenly cleared up.

“Woah dude… that was loud…” I shivered.

“ OH MY FUCKING GOSH, THAT’S WHAT YOU HAVE TO SAY?! AFTER A WEEK OF WORRYING EVERYONE, YOU SAY ‘WOAH DUDE THAT WAS LOUD?!”

“Umm… I’m sorry?”

“You better be, ass-face. I’m coming over NOW.”

“No… no please…” but the line was dead. Ugh. Great idea, calling her. Absolutely splendid. I got out of bed to wear something…appropriate and fell back on my bed, waiting for her to come. If only I knew what was really coming.

After about half an hour, I heard a knock on the door. Then, immediately, the door blasted open. And Nicole, Bells, Ana and Heather stormed in. Woah, when did Heather get here? She had golden-brown hair, kept short. She was of average height, wore glasses, which hid her dark brown eyes, which complimented her lightly tan skin. They all came at me, and hugged me, squeezing the air out of my lungs.

“Can’t breathe…CAN’T BREATHE!!” I choked.

“Oh. Oh. Sorry..” they all said at once.

“So… what happened?” Heather asked.

“You guys didn’t tell her?” I asked. They shook their heads. Ugh. So I filled her in. With everyone else listening carefully.

“Well… that WAS terrible. But maybe you were being over-emotional, Jess. Maybe he was just kidding…” Heather said, when I was done. WHAT THE HELL?!? I saw Nicole give Heather a glare to shut her up, when she saw the murderous glare I was giving Heather.

“Wait… but isn’t that a possibility, Jess? Have you tried talking to him about it? Does he even KNOW why you were upset yesterday?” Bells said.

“So I was being too emotional when he was insulting me, and making fun of me? He might’ve thought that funny? WHO IN THE FREAKING WORLD FINDS SUCH A THING FUNNY?!

“Hey…hey calm down. Listen. Forget it. Forget all about him. Lets do something else now, ok?” Ana said.

“Yeah…Lets play…” Nicole grabbed a pillow, and threw it at my face. “ PILLOW FIGHT!!!”

I lay down on my bed, a bar of chocolate in my hand. Everyone had left at about ten. And I still couldn’t get Austin out of my mind. I switched my stereo player on, finished my chocolate up and cuddled into the soft, warm mattress, pulling the blanket over my head. And that night, I had of my old dreams of Austin.

He was walking across the sandy beach, the light falling perfectly on his beautiful face, as the water washed his feet from time to time. His deep, dark eyes stared into my very soul… so beautiful…

I got up to the feeling of warm hands wrapped around me, my legs wrapped around someone else’s warm legs… it felt so good. I sighed. A warm hug. That’s all I had wanted. I snuggled in closer into his chest. And then I wondered… WHY THE HELL IS THERE A GUY IN MY BED?! AND WHO THE HELL IS HE?! But I liked it, I whined to myself. Against my will, I tried to push myself away from the person. But the person’s arm tightened around me. I let out a deep sigh. I NEED TO KNOW THE THIS GUY IS!! I looked up to the sleeping face of… AUSTIN!! I screamed silently in my head.

“ AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!”

Maybe that wasn’t all that much in my head. He wakes up with a shock and gets out of bed, taking all the warmth away, leaving me cold. I shivered involuntarily.

“WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU SCREAM FOR?!” he said in a loud voice. Ok. This guy comes to MY house, in MY room, sleeps with ME on MY bed and asks me WHY I SCREAMED?!

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE? AND WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING IN MY BED?! AND WHY WERE YOU… YOU’RE HANDS… YOU’RE ARMS… UUGGGHHHH!!!!!!” I screamed. “WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?!”

“Umm… I came to apologize…” he said in a quiet voice.

“WHAT?! YOU HAVE THE NERVE TO THINK THAT JUST BECAUSE YOU CAME HERE AND APOLOGIZED, I’LL FORGIVE YOU JUST LIKE THAT?! FOR THE SECOND TIME?!”

“WHY ARE YOU STILL SCREAMING AT ME?!” he shouted back. “Jess…please stop screaming, and here me out? Please?”

“NO I WILL NOT STOP SCREAMING!! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW MAD I AM AT YOU RIGHT NOW?!”

“Yes. Yes I do. Which is why I’m here to apologize. Please hear me out?” he pleaded. Well… he is pleading…

“Fine. Talk. But if I think I find you spouting rubbish out of your mouth I will kick you out immediately.” I hissed.

“Jesse. I am really sorry for everything that I have ever done to you. I never really knew why I did those things, but I know that they hurt you, and I never wanted that. Maybe I WAS being a huge homophobe and insulting you out of disgust. But if that had been the case, I wouldn’t have felt… I wouldn’t have felt my heart break when you… when you ran away from me at the mall. And then I thought, I thought for the entire week, and never left my room, and kept thinking…and…Jesse… I was a huge jackass to you…”

“Yeah you kinda were” I interrupted, not wanting to know what he was going to say… he was just playing with me. He didn’t really… he couldn’t…

“ Let me finish please?” he pleaded, “ I was a huge jackass to you…because I was trying to get your attention. And I was trying to get your attention because…”

“I tried to beat you, but you so hot that I melted,

I fell right through the cracks, and now I’m trying to get back...”

That wasn’t me. It was Jason Mraz. Blame the interruption on the guy with the awesome voice. My stereo had started blaring on its own.

“ Sorry… go on.” I said to him, giggling.

“Umm… Wont you switch it off or at least reduce the volume? Ugh. Ok. I was trying to get your attention because…I felt like I needed to be around you, near you, all the time. I did it, because…Jess. I love you.”

And everything went silent. He looked like he had stopped his breath. And I knew I had stopped mine. Even my stereo had enough sense to shut up. Weird. And Me, being me, broke the silence.

I started walking over to him “You’re lying. You can’t be in love with me. You’ve been making fun of me being gay all this time. You can’t be gay. YOU CAN’T!! And even if you are, imagining that you ARE in love with me, you cannot just walk in here telling me you love me out of nowhere and…”

He bent down and kissed me.

It was so amazing. My knees felt so weak, I felt like I would fall over. His breath was so sweet, his lips so soft...

And the stereo started again. Smart thing…

“But I wont hesitate no more, No more,

It cannot wait, I’m yours….”

I felt absolutely weightless, like I had been lifted off earth, and sent to heaven. I felt like I was in heaven. His hands slid down to my waist, and I raised mine and wrapped them around his neck. It was like… like magic.

“”Open up your mind and see like me,

Open up your mind and damn, you’re free,

Look into your heart and you’ll find,

Love, love, love, love…”

He broke the kiss. “Be mine?”

“I’m yours.”