Hello, My Name is... - 4. Chapter 4 And So the Journey Begins...

   Christian's first night home goes a little differently then expected...  A/N Glad to welcome aboard intune...welcome to the jungle, Dear...  

A moment of silence enveloped the room, and all that could be heard was the ball of the pen scraping across the paper as Dr. Reeder sat across from him jotting down notes. Christian propped his elbow on the desk and rested his chin in the palm of his hand. He knew there was no right or wrong answer to the doctor’s question, but he also knew how serious the question was.

After a few moments, the doctor looked over at Christian with an expectant gaze as if to say…’well?’

“It’s like the more I try to remember, the more confused I am,” Christian began, sending the doctor a disheartened glance. “Frustrated is a better word,” he admitted after a few beats. Doctor Reeder just nodded and took more notes. Christian straightened his shoulders and furrowed his brow questioningly. “It’s like a block of time has been hacked off. I have a beginning, an end, but no middle.”

“Explain that,” The doctor encouraged while setting his pen down. He rested his arms on the desk giving Christian his full attention.

“Okay.” Christian scratched above his brow even as he tried to collect his thoughts. “It’s like the end. I’m told I’m married, to a guy, no less.” He sighed while shaking his head incredulously. “I have kids. Two little boys that I don’t remember, but they remember me.” He smiled fondly. “Then there’s David.” The corners of his lips turned up slightly at just the thought of him even though he knew it was wrong. He had been raised all his life believing that the life he was told he’d been living was wrong.

“What about David?”

“David is just….David.” He couldn’t hide the faraway, dreamy glint in his eyes. He swallowed hard in an attempt to maintain his composure.

Dr. Reeder smiled. “How do you feel about David, your sons…your family?” He signed his point.

Christian took in a deep breath and held it, pondering the question. He exhaled slowly and answered simply. “I don’t know.” His expression was soft, yet thoughtful.

“That’s fair enough. And the middle?” The doctor probed further.

“Huh?”

“You mentioned there was a middle?” He kindly reminded him while picking up his pen.

“Yeah.” Christian fidgeted with his fingers before idly playing with the gold band on his left hand. “The middle…when did all this happen?”

“It can be overwhelming,” Dr. Reeder noted, jotting more notes on his pad.

“Indeed,” Christian said with a half-smile. He rubbed his finger under his chin, squinting to see across the desk at what the doctor was writing. The expression on the Dr. Reeder’s face was serious…calculated, causing Christian to wonder if he should be concerned, more than he already was.

Dr. Reeder stopped writing again and placed the pen to the side before focusing on Christian again. He paused for a moment before speaking. “Are you ready to go home?’

“No,” Christian replied without hesitation, causing the doctor to laugh slightly. “But what choice do I have?” He shrugged. “I can’t stay here forever, eventually you guys would put me out or my insurance would stop paying and then you’d put me out.” He chuckled humorously while scratching above his brow.

“There are choices, Christian.”

“What?” He posed. “I’m an only child. Dr. Goens told me my father died six years ago.” He frowned rubbing hard at his temples. “Damn…I wish I could remember that at least.” He sighed. “He said my mother is alive, but she’s not here.” He creased his brow, still unsure as to why. There was still so many questioned that were unanswered. “He said David was the only person listed as an emergency contact on my file.”

“I see.”

“Then there’s Liam and Ethan.” He rested his chin in the palm of his hand and sighed contemplatively.

“Your sons,” Dr. Reeder presumed.

“Yeah.” Christian’s eyes lit up. “My sons. They’re great kids and I’m sure they’re expecting their father to come home. I owe them that.”

“What about David?”

“That whole situation within its self is baffling.” He rolled his eyes toward the ceiling. “I mean I have nothing against gay people, you understand, it’s just….I-“

“You don’t feel anything when you see him? No connection at all?”

Christian inhaled deeply, meditating on the doctor’s question. “I believe everyone when they say we’re married, how that happened I don’t know, nor do I understand it, but I do believe it,” He admitted. “When I look at David, do I feel anything?” He repeated the question. He placed his hands in his lap, biting down on his lower lip and gave him a crooked smile, “Yes.” He finally admitted, “What, I don’t know, but I feel I owe it to him and to myself to see what kind of life we had…our family had before this happened.” He ran his fingers gingerly over the short prickly hair that had starting growing back after the stitches were removed. “Does that answer your question?”

“It does.” The doctor picked up his pen and again started jotting down notes. “You go home this afternoon,” He stated nonchalantly. Still examining his notes, he didn’t see the stunned expression on Christian’s face. “Dr. Goens will do the official discharge papers when he comes by to see you.” He stopped writing and glanced across the desk. “I want you to schedule your return visit as an outpatient with me within the next twenty-four hours. We need to evaluate you, see what you remember after you’ve been home for a day.”

“Um…okay.”

“Christian?”

“Yes?”

“You’ll do fine,” he promised encouragingly.

Christian snorted, not sharing his doctor optimism, but he was willing to give it the old “college” try.

~*~*~*

“Help?!” He screamed as he struggled to get free. He pulled his body into a tight ball, looking down at the big black, human sized pot below him over flowing with boiling water. David used the back of his hand to catch the sweat dripping into his eyes while using the big spoon to stir in the ingredients.

“Salt daddy.” Ethan titter tottered over to the pot carrying an oversized container. He snickered looking up at the main course before pouring in more salt.

“That’s enough, Son; we don’t want him too salty.” David grinned mischievously while continuing to stir.

“More carrots, Daddy?” Liam asked even as he added more.

“Drop them in son.” David laughed menacingly, “This is going to be great. I’m starving, kids, aren’t you?”

“Help?!” He screamed again, hoping someone would hear his desperate cries. He was about to be Sunday’s dinner.

…

“Christian…Christian?” He felt a strong hand tap him on the shoulder.

“Huh?’ He snapped out of his day-dream, blinking several times.

“Dr. Goens.” David drew his attention to the doctor as he entered the room.

“Oh yeah.” He breathed a sigh of relief as he glanced around the room. His eyes rested on the children who were sitting like little angels. Liam was playing some portable game with his little brother by his side cheering him on. He watched as David pushed himself off the chair making his way over to greet the doctor. Though he tried not to stare, he couldn’t help but notice how fine David’s butt looked in his red tag Levi’s. He tried to eavesdrop, but he couldn’t hear what they were saying. Dr. Goens smiled as he peered around David’s shoulder giving him two pats on the back. His smile was kind and filled with confidence as he made his way over to his patient who sat anxiously in his wheelchair waiting to be discharged.

He stopped in front of Ethan and Liam and smiled. “Hi, Guys, what you got there?”

“A DS, I’m playing Mario Kart,” Liam said only glancing up from the game to be polite as his dads always taught him. His attention quickly returned to the game, his fingers moving lighting fast.

“Go, Liam, hurry!” Ethan yelled bouncing excitedly in his seat before sticking his fingers in his mouth. Dr. Goens laughed amusingly, tousling Liam’s hair. He pressed the metal chart against his chest turning his attention to his patient. David walked up taking his place beside his husband and sat down. All eyes were on the doctor.

“Well, it looks like the gangs all here, how do you feel?” He asked as he pulled up a chair and sat down across from the anxious couple.

“A little nervous,” Christian admitted, “But good.” He smiled at David who appeared to be nervous as well, which was to be expected.

“Hum.” The doctor opened Christian’s chart, examining its contents. Christian chewed on his thumb nail and David could see the uneasiness in his husband’s eyes.

He leaned over and whispered in Christian’s ear. “It’s going to be okay,” he assured him, sending a warm smile his way even while caressing Christian’s arm. He rested his hand there as they waited anxiously for what the doctor had to say.

“Okay.” He peered over his black-rimmed glasses. “You’re going home today,” He informed in an easy tone.

“Yay! Daddy come home.” Ethan scooted down off his chair and scurried over to his dad. “Up daddy, pick me up,” he demanded even while climbing up on Christian’s lap. Christian laughed subconsciously trying to hide the nervousness as he pulled the lad onto his lap. “Daddy.” Ethan cupped Christian’s face in his chubby little hands. “I wuve you.” He grinned before kissing him on the side of the mouth.

“Awww….” Christian pouted feeling a little awkward before pulling Ethan into a tight embrace. The smile that David tried to hide bubbled forth erupting into a hearty laugh. He could see the emotions over taking Christian, and glancing at the doctor sensing he noticed it too.

“Looks like someone’s eager to get you home,” Dr. Goens noted.

“He’s not the only one,” David voiced through a soft smile.

“Well let’s get this party started.” The doctor pulled out a few forms and handed them to Christian. “The one on the top is a prescription for pain. You can take regular Tylenol, but if the pain becomes too intense, take one of these.

“Okay.” Christian nodded while he and David look at the paper. He shifted Ethan in his lap to get a better look.

“The second one is for anxiety it also has a sleep aid in it, so it’s best to take that one at night,” he advised.

“Okay…” he stated hesitantly.

Sensing the uncertainly in Christian’s voice he suggested he only take it if he felt he needed to. By the time the doctor had finished going over the discharge paperwork and instructions, Liam had joined his family, and was sitting on David’s lap like a big boy.

“Okay, I think that’s it.” Dr. Goens sighed while pushing his glasses up on the bridge of his nose. Do you have any questions for me?” He looked between David and Christian.

“Um, I do.” David raised his hand.

“Sure.” The doctor turned his attention to David.

“With the medications he’ll be taking, are the any food restrictions?”

“Hum,” Christian said below a whisper. He arched his brow, impressed by David’s question. He wouldn’t have thought to ask that.

“Good question,” The doctor commended. “But no, he should be fine. I would suggest no alcohol however. Not while taking the medication. But a glass of wine with dinner wouldn’t hurt.”

Both David and Christian nodded their understanding.

“Anything else?”

“No, Doc, I think that’s it.”

“Okay. The nurse will be in shortly to escort you out,” He said upon standing. “And Dr. Reeder wants to see you tomorrow.”

“I’m perfectly capable of walking,” Christian protested.

“I’m sure you are. It’s your brain we’re worried about, not your legs,” The doctor teased.

“Phfff…” Christian waved him off dismissively. Their little banter lightened the mood a little.

“It’s hospital protocol. You’re considered a patient still under the hospital’s care until you are safely in you vehicle,” He explained.

David stood promptly, moving his son aside and extended his hand. “Thank you so much Dr. Goens,” He said with gratitude. “We really appreciate everything you guys have done for us.”

“You’re very welcome.”

He gave David’s hand a firm handshake as he glanced over his shoulder admirably at Christian and the boys. They were huddled together, their eyes fixed on the screen in Liam’s hand. “You guys take care of your dad, okay?”

“Okay,” Both Liam and Ethan replied excitedly while hanging on the father.

“Christian if you need anything, anything at all, don’t hesitate to call.”

“Thanks, Dr. Goens.” Christian waved, tightening his grip on Ethan, before turning his attention back to Liam and his game. The doctor gave David a sly wink before heading out the door.

…

Christian, Liam and the nurse waited outside the hospital for David to bring the car around. His eyes widened in awe when a Metallic, Midnight Blue, 2012 Land Rover Discovery pulled in front of him and David hopped out.

He hurried over to Christian offering his arm for support as he helped him out of the chair. He opened the door offering his aid while Christian carefully climbed inside. After getting his husband situated, he helped Liam get buckled in; Ethan was already secured in his car seat that was located behind Christian’s seat, he had gone with his daddy to bring the car around while Liam kept an eye on Christian.

“You ready?” David asked. His excitement, hardly masked, was busting at the seams. He was finally taking Christian home. He knew he was asking a lot, but he hoped that being home, around familiar things…his things, would jar his memory and he would come back to him and the kids, and come back to their bed- he missed him something terrible. He missed just holding him at night, talking about nothing till they both fell asleep.

“Yeah.” Christian nodded while securing his seatbelt. He glanced back at the boys and smiled, receiving two giddy, goofy ones in return. He wasn’t sure what to expect. He still had so many questions that were unanswered, but he was going to do as the doctors instructed and take it slow. One day at a time. He felt sad that he didn’t mirror David’s excitement, but he hoped for everyone’s sake that he would get his memory back and get on with his life, whatever that entailed.

The pharmacy was just around the corner and Christian waited in the car listening to the radio while David and the boys went inside to get his prescriptions filled. Just like other kids there age; associating the store with ‘goodies,’ he was sure Liam and Ethan went because they wanted something, a toy or a snack maybe. He didn’t mind being left alone; it gave him time to relax. Ever since this whole thing began he felt as if he was on stage, the center of attention and he couldn’t display his true fears.

After a few moments he watched David and the kids exit the store and giggled softly. David was a cupcake, he thought, both Ethan and Liam followed behind there dad, their mouths filled with something he was sure they shouldn’t have. After assisting David to get the boys back in their car seats, he glared at David arching his brow while crossing his hands over his chest.

David started the engine and put the car in drive. It was obvious he could feel Christian’s heated stare, but avoided eye contact.

“What?” David shrugged, after a few moments, while keeping his eyes on the road.

“You know what,” Christian challenged, “That’s why you won’t look at me.”

“What?” David glanced over for a brief second to prove Christian wrong, feigning innocence. Christian pursed his lips, deepening his glare before giving a quick nod to the back seat.

“Oh…” David chuckled embarrassingly. “You mean the ‘fruit’ snacks,” He emphasized the word fruit purposely.

“You’re kidding, right?” Christian charged even as he looked at Liam and Ethan, their hands were sticky, mouths filled with candy and juice dripping down their chins, they were in heaven. “The only “fruit,” he used air quotes in there is the words on the packaging,” Christian pointed out.

“Well.” All David could do was laugh. Christian sighed, shaking his head. He looked out the window at nothing in particular; hiding his own smile.

The car was quiet except for the Bruno Mars’s ‘It Will Rain,’ playing on the radio. Christian looked back on his shoulder at Ethan and Liam in the backseat. Liam was still playing his game and Ethan was staring out the window sucking on his fingers contently. He took a deep breath and glanced at David, who had one arm resting on the door with the other gripped tightly around the steering wheel, his eyes focused on the road ahead. Was this it? Was this truly his family? He stilled himself, steadying his breathing. He had to ask, he had to know.

“David?” His voice was low and non-intrusive.

“Yeah?” David took his eyes off the road for a quick second.

“Can I ask you something?”

“Of course, anything.” David switched hands using the left one to grab the wheel, even as he placed the other on Christian’s arm.

“Dr. Goens said my dad died six years ago.” David’s breath hitched and Christian watched as his demeanor changed.

“That’s right.”

“I don’t remember that.” He admitted sadly while chewing on the inside of his cheek.

“I know.” David took a deep breath and released it slowly.

“Did I go to the funeral? Did, did we go?” He adjusted himself in his seat so he was facing David.

“We went to Mississippi, yes, but you went to the funeral alone with your mom.”

“Oh…” Christian nodded his understanding. He went alone. He wasn’t surprised, he knew if this was indeed the lifestyle he’d chosen, his father couldn’t have accepted it, but he asked anyway. “Did you and my dad get along?”

“Let’s just say I wasn’t at the top of Mr. Beck’s favorite person list.”

What David didn’t say was that there was very bad blood between him and Mr. Beck. He didn’t want to reveal too much information too soon.

“And my mother…where is she?”

“You’re mom is in Africa,” David said taking his eyes off the road briefly.

“Africa?” Christian questioned curiously. “I though Dr. Goens said she lived in Mississippi.”

“She does,” David confirmed. “Before your father died he and members of his congregation went over to Africa to offer aid,” he explained. “And after his death the members of the church were still dedicated so…”

“So my mother is over there doing missionary work,” Christian stated more than asked. He did remember growing up, they we always volunteering at the shelters on Thanksgiving and Christmas.

“Yep. She knows about the accident and I called the church when you came out of the coma, it’s the only number I have. They said she was in the village and they would give her the message when she came back.”

“She hasn’t called?”

“No, not yet. But I’m sure she will,” David assured him and smiled. Again he wasn’t ready to disclose everything. Christian had just gotten out of the hospital, and he didn’t want to overwhelm him. He was taking him home today and he didn’t want anything to spoil the evening. When the time was right he would tell him everything. “You hungry?” He asked, attempting to change the subject.

“I could eat.” Christian grinned while rubbing his stomach.

“Your favorite Italian restaurant is around the corner from the house, what do you say, we stop in for dinner?”

“Oh no,” Christian objected, his hand instinctively reaching behind his ear. “I don’t think I’m ready for the public just yet.”

“Cool. We can order to go then.”

“Yeah…” Christian nodded turning his attention back to the road. He relaxed his back against the leather seat and sighed somewhat content….for now.

The rest of the drive home was nice. They stop the Arial’s and David went inside, got a menu and brought it out so they could order together.

Soon the inside of the car smelled of Italian spices and garlic. Liam and Ethan were still secure in their seats eating fresh, hot breadsticks while Christian looked at every street sign, every building, drug store, and park they passed, trying to recall it to memory and getting frustrated that he couldn’t remember anything in Cambridge. He noticed they turned left by the McDonalds and entered a cluster of homes nestled amidst the trees. The homes that lined the double wide street were huge, vintage looking with long porches, nice manicured lawns and lots of trees.

“We live here?” He asked, his eyes wide and his mouth agape.

“Yes.” David smiled. He loved seeing that spark. Christian may not have his memory, but he still had that sparkle that he fell in love with.

Christian picked this neighborhood for a reason. It was an architect’s dream. His eyes darted to the left. ‘If they gutted the front porch and rebuilt it that would add life to the home,’ He thought. ‘Oh my god,’ His eyes darted to the right. ‘And a nice sunroom on the side of that one. Wow…’ He placed his hand to his chest, his mind running in a million directions. Even though he didn’t say it aloud, David could sense what he was thinking. He knew Christian all too well. He was talented and could construct a molehill into a mountain. He was like a kid in a candy store when it came to things like this. It was almost embarrassing. Whenever they would go to a friend’s home for dinner or a party, Christian would dissect it, whispering in David’s ear what they could or should do to improve it. He laughed to himself thinking he was always afraid that one day someone would overhear him.

They pulled into the driveway of a house on the cul-de-sac. It was a two story colonial style with huge pillars on the front. The porch wrapped around to the left, meeting a screened in patio. It was truly breath taking, even though it was under construction. There were three pallets of red brick off to the side by the garage and a couple of construction worker milling about.

“Here we go. Home sweet home,” David announced while put the SUV in park. Christian’s eyes were still wide as saucers.

“What’s going on?” He asked as he excited the vehicle.

“We’re having the house remodeled,” David explained. He was unbuckling Liam while Christian unbuckled Ethan’s seatbelt. “We got it for a steal. We’re almost done. You had the whole house gutted. Carpet pulled and replaced with hardwood floors. Walls knocked out to extend the living and dinning room. It looks nice.” He said fondly as he put Liam down. He and his little brother ran toward the men outside the house. Christian could tell they were familiar with them. David grabbed the food handing it to Christian before gathering Christian’s bags from the back.

“I’m sure it does,” He said more to himself. “I just wish I could remember.” Christian frowned looking at the house.

“You will,” David assured him as he slung the garment bag over his shoulder. “Let’s get inside. I’m starving.”

Christian followed David up the walkway, taking hesitant steps, noticing the silver Infiniti and sleek, black motorcycle parked on the side of the house. He wasn’t sure what awaited him inside or if he would remember any of it. David opened the door allowing the boys and Christian to enter first.

Christian’s eyes scanned the room. The inside of the house was just as grand as the outside. It was so much he couldn’t absorb it all.

“Liam, go help your brother cleanup for dinner.” David ushered the little ones out while sitting the bag on the sofa. Christian stood motionless, trying to remember…something, anything. He felt David take the food from his hand, saying that he would get everything ready.

“Okay,” Christian mouthed, still in awe. The living room was decorated in shades of gray with splashes of color throughout, which was a perfect compliment to the marble fireplace that spanned from the floor to the ceiling. As he looked around his eyes landed on the picture over the mantle and his heart skipped several beats. It was a black and white frameless picture. In the picture David was posed on the floor barefoot, wearing a pair of jeans and a white tee shirt. Christian was positioned between his legs, his back pressed against David’s chest with his hand resting comfortably on his husband’s knee. Liam was nestled between Christian’s legs, his chin resting on daddy’s knee, his smile as bright as the sun and next to him was his little brother. Everyone was dressed in the same attire, the only color in the picture was the red ball held tightly in Ethan’s hand. He could tell the picture was a couple of years old, but they looked truly happy…proud.

He tried to swallow the dryness collecting in his throat and process what he was seeing. As he looked at the family portrait he felt nothing. There was no collation in his mind to what his eyes were beholding. It was as if he was looking at someone else’s family and he was just a fixture placed in the middle. He felt his heart palpating and his head started spinning. His palm became sweaty as he legs buckled and his body went limp giving way to the darkness.

“Christian?!” David’s voice echoed in his ears. He felt his husband’s arms catching him before his body hit the floor.

~*~*~

He stepped into the guestroom with a towel draped loosely around his waist to fine a pair of pajamas across the bed. He could hear David on the phone in the other room with Dr. Goens explaining what had happened. It was just a simple black out, he was sure, but David insisted on calling anyway. As he got dressed he looked around the room, taking it all in and much like the guest bathroom there was nothing in there that stirred anything in him, nothing personal. It was like staying at a hotel. It was neat and clean and that was all.

Christian sat on the edge of the bed and noticed that David had brought in his medicine along with a glass of water. He sighed as up opened the bottle popped two of the anxiety pills into his mouth, washing them down with water. He leaned forward resting his head in the palm of his hands. “This is unbelievable.” He sighed then went into a fit of the giggles. “Unbelievable, seriously.” He laughed in spike of himself. “Of course it’s unbelievable, what else could it be?” He continued laughing when he heard the door creek open and saw a pair of big green eyes staring at him in wonder.

“Liam.” He forced a smile as he tried to regain his composure.

“Are you okay, Daddy?” He asked shyly even as he eased into the room dragging his blanket behind him.

“Yes, Liam, I’m fine.” He smiled motioning for him to come closer. Liam made his way to the bed and Christian picked him up, setting him beside him.

“Daddy, this room is for company. Why are you sleeping in here?” He asked looking into his father eyes with concern.

“Um…Well you see,” Christian stammered searching out the right words. He took a deep breath, combing his fingers through his hair as he stole a moment. Liam sat patiently waiting for an answer while bouncing his little legs against the mattress. “It’s that I’m still a little sick, so I think its best that I sleep in here until I get better,” he tried to explain.

“Oh, no…” Liam covered his mouth and gasped. “Daddy gonna to cry again.” He poked out his bottom lip and frowned.

“No…No.” Christian took Liam’s hand into his own. “No more crying for daddy,” He promised, his words soft and comforting.

“No?” Liam blinked several times, his eyes filling with tears.

“No.” Christian smiled. He wrapped his arm around Liam’s little shoulder and pulled him into a hug.

~*~*~

David used the back of his hand and tapped lightly on the door. “Come in,” He heard Christian whisper. His voice was muffled, soft and dry. He frowned and stuck his head inside.

“Is Liam in here?” He knew that sounded stupid, where else would he be. He wasn’t in the living room, or his bedroom and it was clearly bedtime.

“Shhhh….” Christian called back over his shoulder through the darkness. “He’s asleep,” He said even as he pulled the sheet over him.

“Oh…Can I come in?” David asked as he stepped cautiously inside.

“Yeah…”

“So here’s where that little bugger went after he brushed his teeth.” He laughed softly even as he brushed Liam’s hair from his face.

“Yeah.” Christian smiled admiringly at his son. “David?”

“Yes.”

“What if I don’t get my memory back?” Christian asked softly.

“You will.”

“But what if I don’t?”

David closed his eyes not even considering that possibility. Christian had to get him memory back. His life depended on it. “Then we start from scratch,” He answered simply as he sat down beside him.

“What do you mean?”

“Christian, I love you more than anything. When we took our vows, I meant every word. Till death do we part, sweetheart. I’m sorry that you don’t remember, but you promised me the same,” he said, tilting his head slightly, locking gazes with Christian. “We were together for almost two years before we decided to start a family. You and I both know how important that is. We’ve planned our whole lives together.”

Christian sighed as he looked at the little boy lying comfortably in his bed.

“We made a commitment to them as well. But even forgetting about that. Christian, you love too good for me to give you up.”

Christian sucked in a deep breath of air, and stopped breathing. David’s words struck a chord, a major one. Was he in love with this man….was he indeed truly gay?

“You’re stuck with me…”

“David,” Christian whined shyly.

“No, Chris,” he interrupted him. “If you feel or think it’s not coming back, please let me know,” David pleaded desperately. “Because I’ll do everything in my power to “woo” you, make you fall in love with me again. I’ll make you remember why you loved me,” he promised.

Christian looked intently into David’s eyes seeing nothing but determination and love there. “I don’t know.” He sighed.

“You don’t have to know. I know.” He tousled Liam’s hair softly. “I’m almost jealous of them.”

“Liam and Ethan…why?” Christian asked surprised.

David looked over at his son, who shifted, as he if he knew he was being talked about, but didn’t wake up. “They love you and so do I.” He swallowed hard. “But they get to touch you. Hug you. Kiss you… ” He sighed. “I truly miss you, Chris. But you are so worth the wait.” He hesitantly placed his hand over Christian’s before pushing himself up. “Get some rest.” He looked down at the handsome man who was also his husband. He didn’t want to push, make him feel uncomfortable, but for the last six and a half years he’d always kissed him goodnight and tonight should have been different…but it wasn’t. He leaned forward, slowly but with determination and stole a quick kissed on the mouth. He felt Christian stiffen under his touch but he didn’t pull back. He accepted the kiss, though he didn’t kiss him in return.

“Good night.” David smiled sadly as he turned to walk away. Christian stilled his body, combating the feelings coursing through him. Though it was a simple kiss, kissing David was unlike anything he could remember, leaving him breathless.