Random talk~

[minorwaltz]

Hmm......

 

Ok,just like what you saw in the title,here's a random talk,

another random thought.

 

Well,I have been reading a lot of novel and stories here,

mostly romance one and a lot involves teenager too.

There's always about a guy who've fallen in love with another boy for the first sight,

and mostly,they were lucky because the infatuation were reciprocated by the other protagonist.

Then,the relationship will start and the love blooms and drama and yada yada yada...

 

Most of the stories were about the same I guess.But I love to read it,because it cause to wonder whether that will ever happen in reality.

I mean,does that kind of live story exist in real life?

I mean,yes,for the first few early part,where I,the protagonist of my own life,fell in love with another beautiful boy.

Then the crush becomes obsession.But,until then,the contradiction awaits,

cuz,for all I know,all the guys around me are hopelessly straight.I can't help but feeling hurt each time I see him.My eyes tell him I love him,whenever we were caught in each other's gaze.At times,I just wanted to tell him the truth,even if he does not fancy me the I did to him,I just want him to know the truth,I mean,it must be worth something right?

I don't want to regret my life later if I couldn't tell him the truth.

I just wish sometime,so that He know about me.

I just knew it,he'll hate me enough(I think he's a homophobic guy),

it's unbearable to think that the person who love U the most will hurt you.

That's why I passed this issue and kept it as a secret.

 

This is the reason I never believe in such stories,but I ought to wish them miraculously occur to me.

I just wanted someone to love me,and someone for me to love.

Desperately though.........

 

Ok,enough of the random talk,thank you!!

[Anthony]

Yes, Minorwaltz, some of the stories are just delicious and I think it is true that real life is rarely quite as the stories paint it. Some are written by old men like me who use writing as a way of venting their unfulfilled desires. But the bad things in the stories are also more lurid than is common in everyday life. I mean the gay-bashing and unprovoked attacks on gay boys (who are always small for their age and so on). Really bad attacks like Matthew Shepherd are rare enough to be headline news.

 

I was lucky in having non-religious parents and living in England which is mostly very laid back about whether you believe or not. I got christened but never went to church. I do think that apart from the religious there is not so much danger to gay people. I only have one friend who is so religious that he seriously tells me he believes I'm going to hell! [because I'm gay you see even though I'm married and faithful and have children and grandchildren!] I never had the courage to come out to my parents.

 

But when I got to university I was able to be myself and to admit to one friend or another that I really liked so and so. And I never was gay-bashed or encountered hatred and I found a lot of sympathetic people (surprisingly many of them were coaches of various sports - maybe this is because such people get to see a lot of some very good-looking people.

 

So don't despair. Find sympathetic people and make lots of friends.

Love,

Anthony

[Celethiel]

Love happens, infatuation happens. But not instant love in my opinion. However don't give up hope, it'll happen give it time