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podiumdavis

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  2. podiumdavis

    Prompt du jour #2

    By podiumdavis,

    Whoops, I completely forgot that I'd promised myself to post on Mondays. My bad.
     
    As far as I know no one took up the first prompt. But that's okay. Maybe someone will later on, some day. So I'll continue forth.
     
    So here we go. Something simple and just considering yesterday was Remembrance Day.
     
    Prompt du jour #2 – Creative
    Tag: list of words
    Cross, war zone, lighter, torn picture, flashlight
     
    Leave a comment if you try this out
    ~CHEERS~
     
    Andrew
  3. podiumdavis

    Annabel

    By podiumdavis,

    This is a giant leep forwards. I think it's excellent, superb, and amazing that an musical artist chose to show the plight in a way for intersex people, children. What an amazing music video. Please check it out and be inspired.
     
     

  4. podiumdavis

    Let this party start

    By podiumdavis,

    I feel very adamant about my situation. Yes, I'm a struggling alcoholic, and yes I feel guilty, but this I do know; I'm getting stronger each and every day. I have a support system, a loving partner that yells at me when I fail, but in a good way. She lets me know that I promised not to do so, that it makes her sad when I don't hold onto my promises. But it's getting easier to say no to the bottle, I assure you of this. I feel stronger knowing that while I share my struggle, I become stronger. I have many supports, GA included, that are here to encourage me when I do F*$#% up. I grow stronger each day knowing of this fact, and while I continue to move forward, I understand that my transparency, (or at least I hope), is in some way an encouragement to others. We're all human, we all fall, we all struggle, we all brake promises, but in the end we're better for our failings because ultimately we build our resolve and we're made stronger daily. I love my friends here at GA, as well as my other friends in real life. There's no coming between you all, or them. I thank you for your patience (if you read my stories), I really do.
     
    Speaking of stories. I wrote a short story for a prompt on Friday. I stretched myself for that one. I also understand that due its content it might have rifled some feathers within. I acknowledge that the word, of a certain racial slur, was painful for me to even use. But in my eyes, it furthered the persecution of which Damien felt. And thus, I felt it justified the means within the context of the story. Even for me, the N word is painful, especially if you were to consider that my lineage comes from freeing slaves and bring freedom to African culture. So for me, it was a hard line and I hope I've been able to make that clear. Although, I'll never promise that I won't be one of controversy, because that's who I am. I have always intended to provoke conversation, thought processes, and the likes that we may come to a conclusion, a mutual understand outside of our own preconceived notions. That's my challenge to all that read my stories. This will always be a theme of which I intend to do. This is my goal. Change doesn't come without sacrifice, and I intend with every word in my stories to bring change to hearts and minds. Although it may not seem that way at first, for the most part my stories always have an underlying message. A heart of Gold is a great example of this. Damien’s Ordeal, another, or even my poems that I have posted here. They are intended to provoke emotion, thought, and conversation. I hope I've met these goals that I see in my mind. I really hope they do.
     
     
    Now time to party.
     

  6. podiumdavis
    While I've done my best to be as transparent as I possibly can with all of you. I can't honestly sit here and say that I haven't been lying to myself, because with every alarm that’s to wake me for the beginning of the day, I proclaim: Today will be the day I don't get alcohol, I swear to God, and by all that is good and Holy, I MEAN IT!
     
    Then as my work day comes to a close.... All I want is that one sip, that luscious taste hitting my tongue. The sweet bitter goo going down my throat, and I must say, now that I'm here, I never thought I'd become addicted to this ball of sludge. And really, that's what it is. My father struggled with this, but he'd never care to admit it, but he followed in his own father’s footsteps as well. This has been a generational curse that has consumed at least half of my family. I honestly thought I was stronger than them, that I'd never go down this road to alcoholism.
     
    Over these many months it has robbed me of everything I’ve held so dear, and I have no one to blame but myself. This has, at least in my eyes, taken many things away from me, such as, my ability to write, as I’m sure is blatantly obvious. I’ve also robbed my readership of that consistency as well, and for that I’m ever sorry.
     
    Even as I sit here in this present moment in time, and for once, I didn’t get anything to shove down my throat until it knocks me out for the night. I can honestly say that I still have the urge to have a drink. It’s a constant reminder even when I put up my fists and say, ‘NOT TODAY DAMNIT!’ I wholeheartedly want this cycle to end, truly and honestly.
     
    I know it would be easier to take that drink, I know this. But as this psychological warfare continues, I grow ever weaker. Today, or should I say, another attempt, is my first day without a drink. Yes, I’ve said this many times now, it’s a constant struggle and yet, here I stand again, trying to be transparent and hope that this time, yes this time, will be the last.
     
    I can only hope and pray.
  7. podiumdavis
    I’m sure many of you read that this past week my cousin decided to end his own life. As I’ve been struggling with this, crying constantly, and the likes. I’ve found strength that I never knew I had. Over these past twelve months that I’ve been a part of gayauthors, I’m sure you’ve gotten to know me (to some extent) and where I stand on the topic of suicide. On September 27th one of the questions that I posed to our fellow authors/admins/editors, etc, was simple and direct to this fact.
     
    “Given the modern climate in our society, constantly hearing of another gay teen committing suicide across our television screens, how would you, given the chance, save someone's life? Yes, the Trevor Project is amazing, as is the It Gets Better movement. So, in as few words as possible, how does it get better and why does it get better?”
     
    Here’s the link if you’re interested.
     
    Despite the attitude of this being directly correlated as teens committing suicide because of their sexual orientation, is moot at best. Regardless of orientation, anyone doing such an act is tragic and not only hurting the person, but also their entire family. Including me in this instance.
     
    Some of you may know my own past and possibly not. But I was suicidal for two years about eleven years ago. That time in my life was hell on earth, but unlike some; I actually had a support system and a logical mind that told me that if I went through with such an act, not only would I no longer be here, but I would crush my family. This was something I didn’t want to do.
     
    So in that respect, I know how it feels; I’ve been there. I just wish he knew how much he was loved. During the viewing and funeral, people like myself, couldn’t understand why he’d done such a thing. Everyone was crushed, torn, and left feeling empty. About 300 people showed up to pay their final respects, while many others couldn’t even enter the room. They wanted to remember him like he was; a joyful young man who always had a smile on his face.
     
    To say it was a difficult day would be an understatement. But my resolve is the same, I want to help people, and unfortunately I couldn’t be that rock for my own cousin. I know I can’t dwell on the what ifs, and the whys. But I still know that tomorrow will be a better day. Maybe one day, given the chance, I’ll once again try my best to save that one life. That’s always been my goal.
  8. podiumdavis

    A place called home

    By podiumdavis,

    As GA celebrates its tenth anniversary, I thought I'd share some things. Point and blank, unedited, and unprovoked.
     
    When I first came to GA, I came looking for a place to be able to cross-post my stories, to find a wider scope, a bigger audience. As I arrived, I found something very different, and yet very scary at the same time. I had seen GA in passing many times, never looking deeper than the front page; originally I thought it was a site I needed to pay to use and moved on. But once I got past the original registration page, months later, I realized that they included premium content, which was cool. Anyway, I'm going off base.
     
    When I first arrived, I went into chat, found someone by the name of Cia. I was nervous, thought my story wouldn’t fit the style of the site; boy was I wrong. Thanks to Cia, Bugeye, and Krista, who listened to my concerns with a keen eye; they urged me to post and to see what happens.
     
    So with that, I took a leap of faith forward and after some extreme editing on my part, I posted the first chapter of 'The Journey of Jacob and Kyle'. Not only was I welcomed with open arms, review’s and likes out the door, I felt like I had found a special place.
     
    As the months went on, I continued to post, and gained many friends because of it. Instead I find myself cross posting to other sites now, nifty was never my home, but a lifeless shell of some freaky people, who had scared me away once before.
     
    Now I consider GA my home, a place of comfort and acceptance. Encouragement especially. I thank everyone, all those who’ve read my stories, made comments and the likes. For I’ve found a place to call home. Let’s give her another ten amazing years.
     
    Thanks to Myr, the mods, and admins involved for giving us [authors] a place to feel welcome and needed. Especially those who are now published, who are still down to earth and willing to lend an ear. This is where I’ll plant my cot and lay in the shadow of all those better than I.
     
    ~CHEERS~
  9. podiumdavis

    Some may ask

    By podiumdavis,

    I'm sure many of you know how much I love poetry. But after watching this video this is what came to my mind. I absolutely love slam poetry and the way it expresses ones deepest of pains or desires. I'm not saying this poem above is an epic tale, but it's what my heart spoke from the other side. Hope you liked it.
     


  10. podiumdavis

    Prompt du jour #4

    By podiumdavis,

    I don't think anyone took the prompt last week, so without further ado this weeks prompt.
     
    Prompt du jour #4 – Creative
    Tag: Mystery
    There’s a killer on the loose, and everyone in your community is scared. This is startling to you because you sense that the serial murderer is targeting a select class of citizen. Who is he/she and why are they targeting them?
  11. podiumdavis
    Last week I proposed a prompt for Remembrance day, and I will say that I wasn't disappointed. Ron took the prompt and made it his own and made it into something fantastic. Look below to see a glimpse of his response. Now without further ado, this week’s prompt.
     
    Prompt du jour #3 – Creative
    Tag: first line
    “I know you love me no matter what, but …”
     

     
    Want to read more? Check out Ron's response Sandbox.
  12. podiumdavis

    Ending the Cycle

    By podiumdavis,

    I found this somewhere.. I think it's really good. Since I was abused this resonates with me..
     
    "I made this for folks like me, many of whom are still living with shame, guilt, and fear (many of the responses I've received have mentioned similar suicide pacts). I'm aiming to get this out into the public consciousness, because while most facts people know actually come from hearing them in stories, updated information takes decades to filter back into new stories, as most writers cover the same ground with what they learned from others' stories. Eskimos don't have a crazy number of words for 'snow,' sharks don't have to keep swimming to live, Mister Rogers wasn't a fighter pilot, and victims of child sexual abuse don't become offenders. We'd need a new word to out-class the present epidemic if they did because the incidence stats are horrifying."
     
    — Dean Trippe
     

  13. podiumdavis

    Prompt du jour #1

    By podiumdavis,

    So I'm going to be trying something a little new here. I've already spoken to Comicfan and got his blessing. I believe this gives more opportunities to provoke creativity. I think it's a good thing . I hope you do too and are willing to participate from time to time. So without further ado....
     
    Prompt du jour #1 – Creative
    Tag: Time Travel
    As you were sitting at home watching the evening news you suddenly sit straight when the news anchor announces that the ability to time travel has now been discovered. And although you suspect that this could be disastrous and expect the government to hold stringent controls on such matters, you nearly jump out of your seat when they announce that the government is looking for volunteers to test out their theory. Why do you volunteer and what do you wish to change about your past?
     
    Feed back would be greatly appreciated regardless if you wanna do this or not. Do I somehow miss the mark on what a prompt should be? Do I need to be more open ended? Let me know because I'm just doing this for fun....
     
    ~CHEERS~
     
    Andrew
  14. podiumdavis
    When writing, for me, I find music is the best way to get in the mood. Not a personal mood, but in the mind of my characters. When I'd originally written some of the scenes for Sam's New Life (which currently isn't available at GA) I listened to one song non-stop, on repeat. Chicane - What Am I Doing Here, Pt. 1, it made me feel sad. In the same way that Sam was supposed to feel, I emulated those emotions, pulled from personal experience, and then came the emotional response of Sam. Pain is easily emulated, but never easily replicated in the written word.
     
    Through time, approximately a year, with the help of many unnamed sources, I have bettered my craft of writing, especially with those difficult scenes. In the same way, for specific scenes, other music is required. I once heard, from who knows where, that music is the entry way into the soul. Music has the way of influence on a subconscious level, its beyond believable.
     
    In some ways, it was very difficult for me to pull from my most inner self to write Sam’s new life. This may be partly the reason I have pushed it away in time. Two chapters written, two chapters sitting. I have plans to pick it back up, after a time of writing Jacob and Kyle’s story. But I sometimes feel I need to stay focused. I have many fans, from nifty, that beg for the next chapter of Sam’s new life. But alas, my heart still remains with Jacob’s story all the same. I’m sure I’ll pick it up eventually, make myself feel sad, in order to write, which can be rather bad for me. Unfortunatly.
     
    As of recent, it’s been, Christina Perri - A Thousand Years, and Demon Hunter - Dead Flowers, that have helped me write. Love, romance, and the likes. So what is music to the soul? A question left unanswered.
  15. podiumdavis
    I for one, am rather happy with the work that I, Frostina, and Andy have been doing. Working together to better the story. With Chapter #5 coming very soon, and me doing the finalized touches, I am very happy. I believe, in my mind, my soul; that this is the best chapter (written wise, flow wise) yet. But that's my perspective, other's can be the judge of that. I'm very excited to share it soon. ~Cheers~
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