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Zuri

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  1. Zuri

    Tell, don't recount

    By Zuri,


    writing tips
    Most of you will probably be familiar with the rule/advice "show, don't tell". (Actually, this advice is a little flawed in itself, as outlined in "Bad Character Intros vs Good Character Intros (Writing Advice)" by the YouTube channel "Writer Brandon McNulty", but that would be a whole over topic for another day ).

    What we are focussing on today, will be the telling aspect. Because, even though, there can be good "tell", when "show" wouldn't work, and then, there's bad "tell", which I will refer to as "recount", but I'll get to that in a bit.
    To explain what brought be to that distinction, I have to tell you about my experience when writing a short story. I've written it in three parts: The first being the introduction of the unlikable protagonist, ending in the sudden arrival of the antagonist. The third part picks up that plot line and leads to its (somewhat) resolution with an open end. So far, so good. What bugged me, was actually writing the middle part. It's the antagonist's introduction, however, contrary to the protagonist's, it's written as a flashback. And that's where it never felt quite right. Getting the point of the antagonist across properly required me to write a lot of exposition and drop the whole backstory right in front of the readers, because, well, it's a short story after all and we don't have all day. It felt rushed and cramped. But the problem can never be, that it is a short story, but the lack of talent on the author's part or the story just not being the right fit for the short story type in particular.
    Okay, let's consider, the story can work as a short story. In this case, we have to assume, "tell" is the only was to get that much exposition across, assuming, again, that it is necessary to convey the antagonist's motives. That leads us to the question of what distinguishes "tell" from "recount". You, depending on your linguistic affinity and ability to draw conclusions, might already have an idea. Actually, I came up with this distinction when editing a short story here on GA. There, it occurred to me, that the way, this necessary recollection of the character's past, that drives them in the present, can indeed be done in a good or a bad way. When you have to tell about the character's past, you probably don't want it to be all show, but it makes a difference whether you condense it to "He had done this, and then he had done that, before moving on to a third thing".
    So, what's the difference, then? It's in how a reader perceives it. It feels pretty matter-of-factly. It doesn't help to relate to the character, because it feels lifeless. Not, that recounting things is always wrong, but doing it at length can rob your story from its soul. Even though, it's a collection of past events, you have to slow it down a little and dive it. It doesn't have to be an all-interactive "show" with tons of dialogue (maybe a few quotes here and there), but it should describe a couple of events with a few more details that people are able to imagine them happening. It's a bit like the difference it makes whether your history teacher makes you remember mere year dates or focuses more on the events and their reasons.
  2. Zuri
    Title
    Excerpt
    Why?
    Short films
    BRACE
     
    TRIGGER WARNING, Violent and Homophobic content!! After coming out and leaving his girlfriend, Adam dreams of finding acceptance within London's gay scene. His burgeoning freedom is soon challenged when he meets Rocky, a handsome stranger who is harboring a secret that he desperately wants to share with Adam. As their bond strengthens and Rocky prepares to reveal his secret to Adam, their fledgling romance is ruptured by a cataclysmic event that forces the truth to come out in the most explosive manner.
    When dating, what are we looking at, what are we looking for in a person? What would make us revise our decision? What are obstacles we thought would be huge, but if we think about them, aren’t? This story is about a trans person, but it’s also about re-evaluating our mindset about interpersonal relationships in general.
    Still me
     
    From the filmmakers of 'MASKED', 'Still Me' follows the story of a non-binary teenager (Bailey). After coming to terms with their identity it's time for them to come out at school and navigate what this means for their social life. However, this proves harder than they anticipate and Bailey is faced with a choice between social ridicule or the closet. Luckily, Bailey makes a new friend named Zach.
    Even though, this story is told from a non-binary perspective, it’s about identity and belonging, so not only non-binary folks should be able to immerse in this story. While sexual orientation gets somewhat accepted in the western world, gender identity is still less talked about and less understood by those, unaffected by it.
    Feature films
    Prayers for Bobby
     
    Prayers for Bobby is a televised drama film that premiered on the Lifetime network on January 24, 2009. The film is based on the book of the same name by Leroy F. Aarons, which is itself based on the true story of the life and legacy of Bobby Griffith, a gay teen who killed himself in 1983 due to his mother's homophobia. Ryan Kelley stars as Bobby Griffith and Sigourney Weaver portrays his mother Mary.
    CN suicide
    NGL, this movie was an emotional roller coaster ride for me. So intense, like almost no other movie I’ve seen. I love, that not everything is fine, but everyone tries to make the best out of the situation—that’s how life is
    The Matthew Shepard Story
     
    The Matthew Shepard Story is a 2002 made-for-television film directed by Roger Spottiswoode, based on the true story of Matthew Shepard, a 21-year-old gay youth who was murdered in 1998. The film scenario written by John Wierick and Jacob Krueger, it starred Shane Meier as Matthew and Stockard Channing as Judy Shepard and Sam Waterston as Dennis Shepard.
    CN Suicide, death sentence
    Like in Prayers for Bobby, we see the titular character alive in the beginning and form a connection with him. We witness his death, and then we follow along his parent’s grieving process. In this case, Judy and Dennis almost drift apart when it comes to the question if they wish the death sentence for Matthews murderers
    Web series
    Falling for Angels
    The creative diaspora has converged in Southern California to shape the 21st Century in the most dynamic and diverse city in the USA. Gay men of every color and type explore the Los Angeles dating scene, chronicling the various stages of relationships that inhabit each distinct neighborhood and navigating the issues of sexual health, wellness, and sex positivity. Each of the six episodes is located within a neighborhood, focusing on characters authentic to: Boyle Heights, Koreatown, Leimert Park, Silver Lake, Bel-Air, and Malibu. 'Falling For Angels' is both a dynamic reflection of dating and love today and a love letter to the city of Los Angeles.
    Each episode is a cinematic masterpiece on its own. Storytelling-wise, they tackle topics and don’t shy away to also show uncomfortable sides of it.
    Artists/music
    Julian Hornik
     
    Julian Hornik is a composer, lyricist, and librettist based in Brooklyn, NY.
    He wrote the book, music and lyrics for Tenn, a musical based on the early life of Tennessee Williams. His musical Deathbed Edition premiered at Ars Nova’s 2019 ANT Fest.
    [more …]
    Queer artist, who writes songs and musicals about queer people, including drag queen Shayna Maidel, Peter Doyle, Tennessee Williams, and many more.
    Ben J. Pierce/Miss Benny
    Texas-born, Los Angeles-based independent songwriter and producer Miss Benny is a 20-year old androgynous pop phenomenon with a cult-like following stemming from every pocket of the internet. A self-proclaimed “teenage party favor,” Miss Benny explores the budding sexuality of newfound adulthood through the lens of a young, vibrant queer romantic.
    Besides creative music videos, also their lyrics are often sociocritical and the music catchy
    YouTubers
    Quinn Birkholz/Quinn T. Sensual
    Self-proclaimed “local birate gender anarchist” who educates about gender, sex (like in “getting laid”) and other LGBT* topics.
     
    Calls a spade a spade, videos are well-researched and give an in-depth view on the topic.
    NOAHFINNCE
     
    Noah Finn Adams (born: August 18, 1999 [age 22]), better known as NOAHFINNCE is an English vlogger and musician.
    Noah is a trans YouTuber who first started his channel with covers. Starting with his transition, he focussed on this journey in his videos for a while, until he released his first album. Continuing with his music career, he also now and then does vlogs on trans topics
    I'm Gay - Eugene Lee Yang
    Miss Benny cowboy  
    Eugene comes out as gay in his original, deeply personal music video, featuring music by ODESZA.
    This music video is 200 % art, astonishing visual storytelling, let alone an important message.
  3. Zuri
    What would you say if I told you that writing is a lot like BDSM? You might tell me that you are not into that—but aren’t you? No, no, that wasn’t an invitation for sex. I wasn’t talking literally but literarily. Okay, let’s clear that up: It’s what we can do emotionally with writing. Usually described as an “emotional roller coaster”. You might say that kind of cruelty only exists in splatter and gore. But it might just be that you’re getting BDSM wrong. When practicing BDSM, you wouldn’t go around slapping random people on the street. This would most likely not result in arousal but in arrest because you are a psycho. BDSM, on the other hand is built on trust and a common goal—even though it’s reached through suffering. But it’s not suffering for the sake of suffering but for pleasure. And that’s what writing is about, too. Without the emotional bonding (not bondage), it would be needless suffering.
    We, as readers, surrender ourselves to the dominant author—let them play with us as they please. And if they are doing a good job, they keep us in a constant (or recurring) state of excitement, wanting for more. We don’t want them to stop. It’s not a surprise, books also have climaxes. And after a good climax, there’s the equivalent of post-coital tristesse.
    Just admit it: You like it, too!
    Yeah, one last thing: Just like kinks, it’s not for everyone but you’d be surprised for how many it is.
    Even Hitchcock already knew about the value of suspense. His theory is perfectly illustrated in the opening scene of Quentin Tarantino’s “Inglourious basterds” where SS-Standartenführer Hans Landa (known as “the Jew hunter”) interrogates French dairy farmer Perrier LaPadite who hides Jews under his floor—something we are made aware of. If we weren’t, the end of the scene, where Landa fires his gun through the cracks of the floor and kills all the people down there, wouldn’t have remotely the devastating effect it has on us. Even though, Landa’s whole bearing is intimidating, we hope, that the farmer might find a way to convince him that he doesn't have what the Nazi is looking for.
    As children, what we like and don’t like is quite simple (I know, parents would tell me, it’s not, given the fact that it doesn’t make sense, their child suddenly doesn’t like broccoli anymore), as long as it’s sweets we can eat. When we grow up, our taste buds get more sophisticated: We like coffee, different alcoholic beverages, black tea, dark chocolate. A bitter taste is something, most children cannot appreciate—yet. For a reason, in German we say, literally translated, “sour makes funny”.
  4. Zuri
    The question, of why one should come out in the first place, is probably as old as the coming out as such itself. Similarly, the question of why LGBT* people still need their pride parades and other events. Sure, one could argue, that there are still here and their attacks on queer people in the US or people are killed because of their sexual orientation in other countries of the world. But my answer focuses more on the individual that makes the very decision:
    As privileged people, we often overlook it, but with small comments, we hurt marginalized fellow human beings in our everyday life. Social psychologists call that “microaggression”. There once was an interesting discussion on Twitter where somebody complained, that gays always have to rub their sexuality under everybody’s nose because his co-worker placed a picture of his boyfriend on his own desk. Straight people do that, too—with one difference, and that difference is attributable to society. Because of heteronormativity, we don’t question these pictures of straight co-workers. In the case of gay co-workers, two statements could be made in the heads of the beholders:
    "Oh! xyz is gay!"
    "Probably, he has sex with that other gay in the picture—possibly anal sex!"
    Meaning, the problem is not the picture but the triggers that are deeply rooted in our heads. These triggers can be reduced by more diversity.
     
  5. Zuri

    Part 2

    By Zuri,


    writing tips
    Hero’s journey
    In the last part, we talked about it seeming to be difficult to tell origin stories that inweave new concepts. Apparently, there’s something like laws of nature that apply to writing. Let’s have a look at the hero’s journey. Most of you should be familiar with this. In its beginning, the hero (or heroine) lives in their own world until something happens with an impact that changes the hero’s worldview and sets everything into motion—something that makes the hero and their mentor go on that journey.
    At first, protection and guidance from the mentor are needed by the hero because otherwise, the bad in the world had a too easy job with the hero, but ultimately, the mentor’s destiny is to die and therefore leave the hero on their own. At that point, the hero’s confidence is low, but now that things are already in motion, there’s no turning back. The next confrontation with the villain will be disastrous, but not shattering. Nonetheless, it will be enough to make the hero doubt themself, but that process is necessary to grow realistically. Eventually, this enables the hero to be victorious over the villain in the next encounter and save the world.
    Even though that is classic storytelling, we also find that method in science fiction stories like Star Wars, which has surprisingly many parallels to earth culture and mythology if you take a closer look. But as we already observed, that’s not a principle that only applies to ancient Greek literature anyway.
    Plato’s doctrine of forms of literature
    Speaking of Greek art and culture, Plato formulated his doctrine of forms like that: There’s a mindscape beyond our reality where all ideas exist as templates, and we could only catch an insufficient glimpse at it because we can’t fully grasp it. Therefore, we would emulate these ideas and approximate them, but never completely acquire something entirely equal to the very idea. Maybe it’s the same with the laws of literature or the stories we want to tell. Of course, there’s the hero’s journey, but to tell it in an enjoyable, entertaining, and refreshing manner is easier said than done.
    When you get what you want but not what you need
    I found the following conversation on Twitter in German, which translates to this:
    Who would call themself a “person in need of harmony”? Okay, here and there somebody raised their hand—that’s perfectly fine. When you read a story on Wattpad, chances are that you come across a story written by a beginner. When one writes for the first few times, it can happen, that, when one realized, one can create whole words by just writing, that one attempts to put the perfect imaginable scenario on paper (What if I were president? King? Incredibly rich? Immortal? What if nobody had to feel the pinch of hunger? etc.).
    Especially from science fiction, we know that in every hopeless bad (dystopia) there is good; and in every phantasmically good (utopia) there is bad. Eventually, we accomplish the opposite of what we wanted. If we are perfectly happy, we get used to it, and soon perfectly isn’t enough anymore. But what to do if there’s no more happiness to gain from anywhere? Or we begrudge the protagonist their happiness because they got it for free, and it, therefore, feels like happiness is worthless. Long story short: Living in the land of cockainage will turn out to be only half as good as it sounds at most at first thought.
    A recurring topic of discussions are the deaths of beloved characters. It’s said that one could only hate what one had loved before. There is a certain truth to this: We mourn the deaths of these fictional people, since authors brought them to life, since they were able to tell character arcs that were so authentic that we became fond of them as if they were real. Even though their death hurts and moves us, it proves one thing: The story is written outstandingly well. We should acknowledge that at that moment.
    Fight and battle scenes
    In German TV we have an action series called "Alarm for Cobra 11 – The Highway Police" which embodies perfectly what could be summed up as “spectacle”. I don’t particularly like that kind of show, since they primarily focus on mass crashes and explosions, but over 20 seasons seem to prove it right.
    That being said, I have to admit, that I’m not good at writing either fight or battle scenes. Especially with these, it shows if you stick with the rules no matter what:
    Let’s have a look at a fun fact: Did you know that in multiple-choice quizzes, the correct answer is mostly C? Have you already created such a quiz on your own? If that’s the case, how did you manage not to have a recognizable pattern of which answer is the correct one? The next time when you create such a quiz, watch yourself if you now avoid making C the correct answer after what I told you.
    Another example is an anecdote from when I was still in school: In geography class, we got the homework to interview seventy people in a neighboring village in our spare time. I wasn’t really a rebel in school, but I couldn’t see the point of doing that. Long story short: I figured, I could just fake these interviews. It turned out to still be a huge amount of work. Besides the paperwork itself, I had to create characters over characters in my mind, and they had to be as diverse as possible. Even though I already wrote stories back then, I never had to create seventy characters for one story only, that stand up to scrutiny. Well, on the other hand, people like George Lucas envision a backstory for every single extra on set.
    There is a way to prove if books have been cooked or elections have been tampered with. It’s called Benford's law. It’s interesting that, according to Benford, people, who do these kinds of manipulations, tend to make certain kinds of errors, which leads to the creation of numeral series that look random at first sight but wouldn’t occur normally.
    Let’s get back to writing battle scenes. When I write such scenes, of course, I may show duels, but they do not mean much to the whole. Yet, they can be utilized for character building. But the overall battle has another meaning: Let’s assume, we have party A and party B. Party A should eventually win the battle. It would not be very entertaining if party A was superior to party B from the very beginning and throughout the whole battle. It would actually be pretty boring. One thing is clear: Tides have to be turned at least one time. Of course, it has to be believable. As I told you earlier on, fights are not about the slugfest but what you want to tell in context to the surrounding story. Why does party A win? What does that mean for party B?
  6. Zuri

    Part 1

    By Zuri,


    writing tips
    When writing, there are rules based on the experiences of countless authors from several literary periods on one hand and the expectations of readers that are somewhat trained in what stories look like. While it’s never bad advice to play along, for the most part, good writing oftentimes resorts to some unusual surprises. That’s where stories might shine.
    Don’t always tell the same old story and dare to break some rules
    https://gayauthors.org/story/sammy-blue/gemini/ is partly a very classic story—just like ”The Prince and the Pauper” or “Lottie and Lisa“. Seen one, seen 'em all? My answer to this was:
    The probability that a story has already been told in a certain way, in fact, isn’t that low. Many cultures know these stories—some of them were inspired by one another; some seemed to have evolved independently. How is that possible? (see "Is it unoriginal to write about dragons?")
    To answer that question, I’d like to digress a bit and start by asking how I can be certain that the story, I’m writing, is a qualitative one. I’d say, two important components are rules and laws. Do I have to know all of these? Certainly not. But it might help. Every author has a different writing procedure. Some prefer to plan ahead for the most part before they start writing; others tend to write intuitively and might come to the same conclusion: That they are satisfied with their writing. So they avoided rules altogether? I don’t think so. Would they reverse engineer their work, they’d realize they actually did apply these principles, but intuitively. But how can you apply principles of a craft without knowing them? Well, the answer is rather easy: Even if a craft wrote down these principles, they didn’t lay them down in the first place. The craft just did the same thing, the author did: Reverse engineering. These principles are universal—natural laws, if you will. Because they are in all of us. Because we want to be entertained. Surprised. Astonished. But also scared. To be left in the limbo. We authors react to that needs.
    So that would mean, you only have to obey these rules to have a perfect story, right? Of course, that’s nonsense. Especially in that case, a story feels staged or even artificial to us—and not unique at all. That reminds me of the German or English lessons I had in school: You’re taught dos and don'ts which work in theory (e.g. when writing term papers or the like) but not in the field (e.g. everyday verbal communication). The best example is the double negative: If I would form grammatically correct sentences in that case, that’d cause a lot of confusion. Not to mention the creative use of language in poetry. You see: If obeying to these rules means turning a blind eye on reality, it might cause more harm than good.
    Returning to the initial question, does that mean, that all stories are already told anyway, so it’s pointless to attempt to tell something new? That isn’t entirely true, either, as we already observed. In the following parts, I want to explain to you my thoughts and conclusions I had when writing stories and discussing them, which led me to dive into how other authors write and did write, and which key levers to adjust to write and improve good stories.
  7. Zuri

    Part 3

    By Zuri,


    writing tips
    Authenticity vs everyday life
    There are two camps of literature consumers: Those who practice escapism (fantasy and science fiction to the rescue) and those who prefer stories that seek a high order of reality and authenticity: Feelings—good ones as well as bad ones—, situations you can identify with, which you even already might have experienced.
    In the early days of filmmaking, there have been ideas now and then, that had the potential to be revolutionary. The idea, I want to talk about in this section, came actually into fashion in the last decades—but not quite the way it was intended. I’m talking about reality TV.
    I’m not sure, if you can therefore actually consider him the father of reality TV, since reality was important to him—funnily, that was the reason, his concept was a flop. But let’s not put the cart before the horse: He wanted to follow a married couple around for 24 hours a day—unscripted, uncut, uncensored. But that turned out to be a little overkill: People felt bored watching it, even though in theory that sounded like an honest concept and the two people unintentionally provided a surprise moment—their son came out as gay. Yet, well-intentioned is the opposite of good. The project failed.
    Even though reality TV strives for the opposite extreme today, it does what we talked about in the previous chapter: Deliver, captivate, include—and everything on command.
    But that doesn’t have to mean that the product is the best that is the most far-fetched. Reality TV is called “scripted reality” for a reason—essentially, it’s closer to a motion picture than to actual reality. They have a script, are arranged by a director to ensure, we hang on the character’s every word, and cut by an editor so that we don’t have time to catch our breaths. But is that wrong? Do we feel like somebody lied to us? No, of course not. The dose makes the poison—the trick is to find the right balance.
    The movie is worse than the novel—that is the law
    Just like they say, the movie adaption is doomed to be worse than the novel it’s based on, you could assume, that the attempt to capture reality in a motion picture is destined to have the same desolate destiny. The problem with that assumption is, to think, the task was to copy reality in every possible aspect. Of course, that endeavor would most certainly fail. But the medium “movie” has its own way to express themself—just like a novel has theirs.
    Let’s imagine, you were asked to adapt this scene from a novel to a movie:
    We see that this text describes plenty of things before there is action, let alone words spoken.
    Of course, I could try to emulate the gaze with the camera and follow it by looking at furniture and clothing, but while this seems quite natural in the book, a viewer of the movie would assume, these things had a special meaning that will have significant importance later on. For the movie, I decided to place the children opposite their parents on the other side of the table, which is closer to the wall. Why? Well, in the novel, there is no indication of where each family member sits at the table. While in the novel, there is kind of a Schrödinger’s cat situation (everybody sits everywhere and nowhere at the same time; in quantum physics that is called a superposition), actors inevitably need a specific place to sit in. And so a director would make a virtue of necessity and do subtle storytelling with the characters' placements. We have the indication from the original text that the children sometimes fear their parents, and transformed that into an image because it wouldn’t have been possible to adapt that line par for par. The children sit with their backs to the wall and on the other side of the table are their parents, cohesively.
    In comparison to explicitly looking at furniture and clothing, this detail is not that pushy and not spelled out for the viewer so that the viewer is aware of that but more subconsciously. In the novel, this scene takes several seconds to read; in the movie adaption, it’s not more than a blink of an eye.
    The thing about relevance
    When the mother returns home from work, it takes her forty minutes. That’s inevitable. During a movie or novel, we wouldn’t always explicitly show her driving home unless something interesting or important happens while she’s underway. If we omit her way home, it’s called “time compression” (see story time vs plot time vs screen time). In the reality TV documentary, I talked about two sections earlier, they would have shown us all her way home, leaving nothing unseen and us bored. Sure, in reality, there is no shortcut to this. We have to accompany ourselves on our way home. But even though, we might like stories to be realistic, this is most certainly not what we want to see. We still want to be entertained. It’s enough to see her heading home and arriving. We can imagine the rest.
    In a story, I wrote, I provided the protagonist with a cute yellow lab—cool, isn’t it? Well, so it might feel for you readers. Fair enough, maybe not even for you, since you might have noticed that it is nice to have a dog but considerably less appealing to see the protagonist walk the dog in almost every scene just like in Groundhog Day. The dog became a burden—and it wasn’t even his fault. That’s how pets might feel when they were brought home from an animal shelter and after the initial excitement, nobody wants to take care of them anymore, so they are eventually returned to the shelter. I realized that I’m not fit to be a literary pet owner. One or two nice scenes with a dog—be my guest—but besides that, I’m just not creative enough in this aspect to keep the dog around while at the same time finding interesting scenes with him. Initially, I didn’t want to tell a story specifically with a dog, but I mean, it's not like it hurts anyone, does it? Spirits that I've summoned …
    The evil protagonist
    Who does not know it? In movies like James Bond, viewers want the hero to win; when we, on the other hand, watch shows like How to sell drugs online (fast), we usually want the bad people (drug dealers) to win. So one could argue, it’s less a matter of morals but a matter of who’s the protagonist. Why is that? Well, the protagonist is naturally the character we spend the most time with for the duration of the story and get the best insight into the inner workings of their mind. Many villains are provided with a backstory that explains their actions and maybe even rectifies them. Often times that’s enough to make us hope for the villain to eventually succeed. And who knows, we might get a sequel then.
    Sure, there are shows like “Money Heist”, where the heroes (the police) act quite stupidly or are prone to corruption and/or infiltration by a third party. Also, their credo “The end justifies the means“ might actually enable them to enforce law and order, but might conflict with our attitude to morality. Even in movies like “Joker” where the protagonist is actually a homicidal maniac who would kill us without turning a hair, we consider him “cool” since we are not his target (see NIMBY). Then, there is the show iZombie, where the seemingly evil protagonist (a zombie) is only considered evil by society. Would we do it any differently?
    I had an interesting conversation with my flatmate lately. Let’s imagine a man whose children had been kidnapped. Police start looking for them, arrests a subject, and release it after some interrogation. Impuissance washes over the father. “Why doesn’t the police do anything!?” he keeps asking himself. Of course, the police do everything in their power and what they are allowed by law to find the children. On the spur of the moment, the father ambushes the subject, handcuffs, gags, imprisons, and tortures it, to prize the information where the children are out of the subject. Classy thriller plot. Sure, we side with the father. The police are only doing their job, but in this case, we are okay with lynch law. Because at this moment, we are the father. In Germany, we had a case like that (see The murder of Jakob von Metzler). What would we say if the subject turned out to be innocent? Do we still side with the father, who just broke multiple bones in the other man’s body? Or how would we react if the father realized that he’s too late and because he can’t bear the loss, he wants to fire an atom bomb, to kill all humankind?
    I observed that it is everything but easy to not identify with the protagonist per se because we see the story from their perspective and so their perspective becomes our perspective. That’s what they are made for: We might question their actions, but we offer a shoulder to cry on when needed. Just like good friends. Or like court-appointed legal defenders represent a remorseless, dangerous criminal. Like partners in toxic relationships.
    That’s why I once wrote a short story: Because I wondered if it was possible that readers identify more with the antagonist than with the protagonist. I think this is only possible if the reader isn’t able to relate on any level. Only when they push us actively away.
    See also
    What is an Antagonist — 7 Types and How They Work
    Here’s Why Writing A Screenplay Is Harder Than Writing A Novel - Dr. Ken Atchity
     
  8. Zuri

    Intro

    By Zuri,


    writing tips
    I originally wrote this blog post in German for another community, but I felt like I give it a try to translate and share it with you folks. This is the first post of a now three series which I’m intending to expand since now and then, I get new ideas or encounter other cases when writing or editing stories.
    I'm sorry if it appears to be a bit random, but I wrote it as the ideas came to my mind.
    Make sure, to also check out GayAuthor's writing resources!
     
    I'm sorry if the intro is a little short, but the subsequent parts will be considerably longer and more in detail.
    Grandparent scam/assets of a Nigerian prince
    Don’t just pull rabbits out of the hat when you need them. If there was given no hint beforehand whatsoever, it may be convenient, but feel like cheating at the same time. It’s better to lay out the bait a few scenes before.
    The Hunt For Red Herring
    A story, you know the ending when you read the first page, is rightfully considered dull by most readers. That’s why especially whodunit-type stories use distractions, deceptions, and plot twists to fire full blast. Just like a magician, you are not just telling facts but making them entertaining, and let the readers delve into fictional worlds.
    One common mistake is to create a deceptive plot line that doesn’t seem to serve another purpose than the deception itself. Readers will often times feel dissatisfied by that.
    More information: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=47ntBElzaWk&list=PLG2IXYJ6H-fuZzLunP0fSUNrZYAm8mUtK&index=17&t=55s
    Truism alarm
    Why so precise? Quite unlikely in reality. If being that precise doesn’t serve the story in any way or has no specific reason, scratch it. A lot of things are dependent on a lot of factors. Our daily lives rarely work dead on time each and every day without any incidents. That kind of process fits an evil mastermind more than an average protagonist who isn’t a Mary Sue.
      Show, don't tell
    Better:
    Good vintage has to stock for quite some time
    … and sometimes, it gets forgotten in the vine cellar. Or simpler: When I want to harvest vegetables or corn, I have to put seeds in the ground and wait in the first place before the seed yields fruits. It’s just not fast food!
    Two pieces of information, which trigger an epiphany or a change of mind, shouldn’t be introduced within the same scene. That makes it more authentic, more surprising. Many plot twists are planned well in advance. Some even date back to the very first chapter and don’t come into play before the climax.
    This is essentially called "Chekhov's Gun" (by StudioBinder as seen in "How Knives Out Perfects").
    Family tree
    No shit, Sherlock! I would have never guessed that both had the same family name, since they are related. Of course, there are exceptions but in these cases, mentioning it makes sense.
    You should refrain from attributing complex and implausible family trees to your character if that is not explicitly needed, or you want them to make themselves a fool.
    Closing words
    Here are some more tips on Writing with Jenna Moreci: BEST AND WORST WRITING TIPS
    Also, the On writing playlist by Hello Future Me
    These are the channels with the most videos in my storytelling playlist
    See also: "How To Write A Twist Ending" with John Gray by Film Courage on YouTube
  9. Zuri

    Part 4

    By Zuri,


    writing tips
    Pile the bricks without the mortar
    Let me tell you this very exciting story real quick. You know what? I just tell you the payoff, so you don’t have to wait for it. Of course, this is exaggerated. We all know, that suspension is important, but this is not, what I want to talk about in this section. It’s about an often overlooked or badly handled element of storytelling: The filler scene.
    Filler scenes are boring, and you skip them as a reader, wondering why the author was such a fool to build them in? You, as an author, agree and don’t write them at all? Is your story still a joy to read? I hope so, but oftentimes, it's like forgetting the salt: It’s not the main ingredient but without it, you instantly know that something is missing. And guess what, filler scenes are not limited to being written by bad authors who happen to not know any better. Without a few exceptions (one of them being the show Orphan Black on Netflix), filler scenes are an integral part of the plot. So there must be a reason for them to exist and be deliberately placed where they end up to be consumed by us.
    One thing is often figuratively referred to as a “chance to exhale”. People who understand that can orchestrate their pacing remarkably well. But it’s more than that. What if I told you that filler scenes don’t have to be boring? Even though if they appear to be it on the surface, I would even go so far as to say, it shows some mastery if you know what to put, what to hide in filler scenes. If readers both get a chance to exhale and get little hints—even if they are more like metaphors—we might see these filler scenes in a different light. It’s like in a song: The loud instruments capture our attention, but you can easily hide little mistakes in a crescendo of thunder. When it comes to the soft parts of the song, even to solos, there you can see the little details, because nothing distracts you.
    The undeceived reader and the bilateral arc
    You have probably seen shows where they do a little flashback or flashforward as a cold opening and show you the exact opposite of what the character is currently heading to, which seems like an absolute contradiction. A child might go, “No! No! No! That’s impossible!” but we, as undeceived readers and watchers, “know” that it is very possible. We know, it’ll happen as promised. Even though, we have no idea, how this contradiction will finally be resolved. This is the first thing to get right as a writer: Create situations that are seemingly and convincingly impossible to escape. Don’t forget that we, as authors, are in control of what we show and what we hide to direct our readers' attention.
    Second thing is that we can’t go and resolve this straight. We have to mislead our readers first. This is called a “red herring”—a plot device, we already talked about in an earlier post, so I’m not going into details of how it works. Of course, the undeceived reader anticipates red herrings—even though they might not know the term or how exactly that works, but they feel it in their gut—so of course, there have to be multiple layers of deception just like in the movie Inception.
    Third and last thing is, how to resolve it. Of course, there’ll be a plot twist or an epiphany of sorts at some point, but it’s crucial to do it right. Otherwise, all the work we put into the first and second step doesn’t pay off. I have seen cases where it doesn’t work: Sure, you can say, the solution is something, the readers didn’t think of, but if it is something, they didn’t think of because it is impossible, and you can’t make it possible, you are lazy and that’s not how it works. That doesn’t mean, you can’t make things appear impossible from a certain point of view—because that’s what it’s all about: The reader’s perspective and the author’s perspective. They are not the same, and they aren’t for a reason. So, now we got a reason that doesn’t feel like utter nonsense after all after first reading the story. But what if we read the story from end to beginning, or just re-read it? Would it still make sense? Some lazy writers resolve stories in a way, that only works unilaterally—not full score, then.
    Object permanence—or are you an infant?
    I know, it’s the main character’s story, but that doesn’t mean, all the other characters have to be flat and boring. They might have things going on, the main character only catches peripherally. You don’t have to hide them, and neither do you have to elaborate on them in great detail. And who knows, maybe the story, the main character, and/or the relationship to the side character might benefit from that at some point.
    It’s not a computer game where the gaming engine only renders what you see. Characters aren’t put into a puppet box when they aren’t needed at that time. You know, it’s the same with your friends, don’t you? Or are you anthropocentric?
    Love-hate relationships and hate-hate relationships
    On a side note, when you say “I hate this character”, have you noticed that it might not be clear what you mean by this? Okay, let’s make that a little more clear: On one hand, we have a side character, boring as hell, but they sneak into scene after scene for no logical reason until we freak out. On the other hand, we have a villain who does truly terrible stuff, and even if there is no reasonable chance to succeed with their evil plans this time, they manage to do so against all odds and cause even more misery which makes you curious on how they might have pulled that off. You probably feel that your two feelings towards them are not the same. Even though they both upset you in a way, the reasons are distinctively different from each other.
    While the first scenario is possibly bad writing, the second one is probably the very opposite. Although we hate to admit it, we love that villain for his ability to fuel hate in us like they were real. And if they were real, we’d actually hate them.
    In conclusion, we can say, these two feelings apply to different aspects of the story: Hating the boring character is more like a real-life feeling while hating the villain is more like a canonical feeling. People often confuse these two by harassing actors and actresses in these roles because they think, they must be evil in real life because they’d done that so convincingly on screen. On one hand, this is a compliment, but on the other, it’s nonetheless relevant to criminal law, and they don’t deserve that.
     
  10. Zuri

    Represation, queerbating and pinkwashing

    By Zuri,


    My two cents
    When you get what you want but not what you need
    Who doesn’t like a happy ending? So good representation is when everyone reacts positively to the characters' coming-outs, they don’t have to look for love for long and live happily ever after, right? Right? That might represent your dreams, but that doesn’t represent reality. What representation means is: Can I identify with it? Have I been there?
    In return, does that mean, we can’t have a happy ending? Sure, we can. But it has to be well-earned. First, the story has to pick up where we currently are. That might be a dark place, we wish to escape. There might be someone reaching out to us, showing us the way. That way might be rocky. And if we keep a stiff upper lip, we find our happy ending waiting for us. And we can do it. We are not alone.
    Queer actors/actresses required?
    We often have these discussions on social media where queer people complain that queer roles are portrayed by non-queer actors and actresses. Of course, we can question this, but what is this all about in the first place? The claim is backed up by the assumption that privileged people don’t know how to play marginalized roles from experience. That’s partly true.
    Method acting doesn’t require the actor/actress to have experienced the exact same thing. It can be similar things
    If only one queer and one non-queer actor/actress audition and the non-queer one turns out to be more believable against all odds, why not give them the role?
    Just because you have experienced something yourself, doesn’t mean you are as good of an actor to play that
    What is the key to authentic scenes? The actors/actresses? They have their fair share of it, but they are really at the bottom of the food chain. For them to strive, there has to be a good script, a good counselor, and a good director. So it sometimes might be wiser to place that experienced person higher up in the food chain
    If companies can launder money and air one’s dirty linen in public, why not queerness?

      There are many alternative versions of that meme, and it has a certain truth to it. Just because somebody hoists the pride flag or tweets “love is love”, doesn’t necessarily mean, they are an ally.
    There is a difference between “doing every little thing right from the very start” and “showing stereotypes for laughs”. People are allowed to make mistakes, people can learn from them. Not everything needs to be brightly polished. But it might require some research to not repeat falsehoods people were led to believe.
    Good and bad examples (totally subjective!)
    Titel
    Type
    Rating
    Opinion
    Openly straight
    Novel
    👎🏻
    Review
    Center of the world
    Novel
    👎🏻
    Review
    Sex Education
    Series (Netflix)
    👍🏻
    Although, not being queer per see, Sex Education has a fresh and direct perspective on sex and relationships. Otis might not always have all the answers, but that doesn’t mean that the show can’t portray diversity.
    Love, Simon
    Movie
    👍🏻
    Some criticize Love, Simon to be mainstream and commercializing queerness. Although, it cannot be entirely denied that it is a bit softened and romanticized, in my opinion, the storytelling is still done very well. What I didn’t like, was the ending. It was too cheesy, too predictable, too unoriginal. Yet, I enjoyed the idea of Simon being blackmailed from a suspense building perspective as well as his father’s reaction to Simon’s coming-out since it was honest and authentic.
    What are your good/bad examples? Feel free to share them!
  11. Zuri

    Geography Club—novel vs movie

    By Zuri,


    reviews
    Now, this is a slightly different review because I won't suggest a book or a movie per se, but rather show the strengths and weaknesses of a story by its two adaptations.
    The plot diverges somewhat by taking different approaches to the topic, but not to an extent to which the overall idea respectively their similarities would become unrecognizable. That being set, let’s dive right into it, shall we?
    Theme
    Geography Club—chosen because it's the most boring club possible, so nobody would voluntarily attend—is a cover for a GSA even though, they internally don’t name it as such until later in the story.
    The novel
    I think, the downfall of Russel is depicted more severely in the novel, but actually in a very well-made metaphorical way. Russel tells us about the different tables in the school cafeteria and about Brian Bund and how he feels separated from everyone else, just like Kevin does. This abundantly becomes clear when they meet in the pizza place where first try to start a conversation and then to decide on one pizza topping for all of them, and they realize, they are very different after all despite all of them being queer. They feel relieved to be not the only queer kid at school and that there are others that feel similar to how they feel. However, in terms of group dynamics, they have a rough start—some pairings work and some absolutely don’t.
    One scene in particular, that stood out to me, was their meeting in the cafeteria after they have been only meeting outside of school. In the beginning, they feel out of place with their peers but now, setting with the other queers, makes them feel no less awkward.
    Other than in the movie adaption, Russel eventually hits rock bottom by alienating all his friends, starting with a vote where he had to decide between Kevin and Min, over being outed to his football friends, and lastly messing it up with Gunnar. Even Min and Terese break up. Russel even ends up sitting with Brian Bund, because he isn’t welcome at any other table anymore. He literally came from hero to zero. But Brian accepts him, even though, Russel had treated Brian pretty poorly. Brian also is a character with a different attitude towards his treatment. He is so used to it, he pretends to not even care about it anymore and has a special kind of humor to cope with it. Brian even teaches Russel, that one should not care what people think. That’s also the first time, Brian is considered a human being by any character. Russel, ending up at the bottom of the food chain, even eating with and talking to Brian might be ironic at first, but is only logical if you think about it: After what he’d done to Brian and him being selfish, letting success turn his head, he had to pay the price and at the same time come to terms with what brought him there as well as finding his way back to being true to himself.
    Another interesting side plot is Belinda joining the Geography Club: First, she is seen as a threat, then, she makes the Club more diverse by being non-gay (a typical real-life discussion topic at Pride marches), and finally, she reveals to be marginalized, too. That can be seen as the first hint at the later GSA. So the secret queer club turns into a support group for marginalized people. That’s another big topic in the community: Just because one is, for example, gay, it doesn’t mean, that very person isn’t, for instance, transphobic. The message is clear: Queer people are not less invited to look further than their own noses than cis straight folks are. Interestingly, she doesn’t appear in the movie adaption. There, her character gets merged into Brian.
    The movie
    The movie adaption however turns it way more into a blackmailing kind of story—remotely similar to Love, Simon. Other than in the novel adaption, here, Min finds out about Kevin and Russel by accident when she watches them kiss each other. I actually like this version better, since even though, Min forces them into joining the Geography Club by blackmailing them, it ironically feels less forced than in the novel where Russel comes up with the idea of meeting in the pizza place because being queer seems to be enough similarities for him—which turns out to be very wrong. The blackmailing comes in handy as a plot device and plays into the theme's hands of the fear to be outed.
    A character interesting character is Ms. Toles: She doesn’t have much screen time, but I think, she shouldn’t be overlooked. This teacher stands up for modern sex education against Reverend Bowd, but eventually loses this fight by being fired. On one hand, she—besides Brian Bund—serves as an example for the reader and the Geography Club of why the club is so afraid of being outed. On the other hand, even though, it doesn’t work out, Ms. Toles is a shining example of how sex education should be told at school today. She even provoked her dismissal by giving an interview to the school newspaper about her views on sex education, after she already lost her reputation by practicing sex education in a very open-minded way. That makes her a great role model as well as an ally that stands up for what she believes in. In the movie version, she gets her job back in the end and supervises the GSA.
    If I recall it properly, Kevin is way more considerate in the novel adaption. He makes sure, Russel is fine and even tells him, he should make his own decisions instead of trying to please him. Russel, on the other hand, by doing exactly that, messes everything up just to be with his love interest. Kevin's behavior changes when Russel’s reputation is restored. At that point, we can see, where they really primarily stand after all, what they won’t give up for the world.
    Other notable changes are: In the movie version, Russel only rejects Brian joining the club; in the novel, however, he outright bullies him to look cool in front of his jock friends. Also, in the movie adaption, the idea to found the GSA comes right after Russel is outed by Kimberly, but instead of Brian making the application to clear Russel’s name, here, Russel has the idea to be out and proud. Therefore, Min isn’t angry at him anymore, which takes a little longer in the novel. While Kevin also joins the club in the novel version, in the movie, Kevin avoids it even after being blackmailed by Min and sends Russel to check the club out.
    One thing, that is not in the book but in the movie, is that Russel’s parents want him to have a conservative lifestyle including marrying a woman, and he decides against that. Kevin’s parents, on the other hand, would be cool with him being gay, but despite that, he wants a career and is convinced he’d only have it as long as he convinces everybody that he is straight. That’s why Russel breaks up with him after a fight. In the novel, Russel is over it, and they leave as friends. While Russel is relieved, Kevin has a really hard time, including Russel seeing him cry for the first time. Gunnar even breaks up with Kimberly in the movie version. But other than in the novel, he had no clue, Russel was gay.
    Conclusion
    So, which one is better? You might be disappointed, but hear me out: Both tackle the topic in their own unique way, and both have a different quality to it.
    What I like, in both adaptions, Russel is neither an underdog nor a highly polished jock. Oftentimes, one of these tropes is used to fit into stereotypes. He is not even as good-looking as Simon in Love, Simon, but that might just be my perception. And that’s actually a good thing. None of his traits is outstanding, but to Kevin, Russel is beautiful.
    I really love, that the story keeps us in suspense almost the entire length of the story. Even more, do I love all the metaphors, first and foremost, the cafeteria.
     
    On a personal note: Have you read Subconscious Mind? In that story, in drama club, they actually adapt Geography club, which actually also has stage play adaption in real life. Gareth and Chase are even closely inspired by the relationship of Russel and Kevin.
     
    What do you prefer: The novel or the movie?
  12. Zuri

    Review: Openly straight

    By Zuri,


    reviews
    Always being in the spotlight, filmed by his father with his cell phone camera at every turn like a celebrity, and everybody takes him for “the gay”, but nobody just for the person he is. Taking a shower after gym class is odd, all the people are considerate of him, when they say something that could be considered offensive, and expect Rafe to borrow the cliché. To be just like the others, is, despite the openness and acceptance in Rafe’s hometown Boulder, impossible for him on these grounds.
     
    Foremost, the novel has a strong message to LGBT* people: Tolerance and acceptance is not enough, as long as everybody sees one as different. We only want to be equal. Coming out is still necessary for many—since others still attempt to assume one’s sexual orientation due to heteronormativity and pigeonhole them.
    The idea behind the plot is without a doubt good, but after half of the novel, the plot turns into a run-of-the-mill LGBT* coming of age novel, that tells the nth “crush on the best friend” and “is the love interest straight” story. That’s everything but new. For the most part of the plot, it’s not important that Rafe already came out in Boulder. That takes a bit away from the idea of the plot to work opposite of other LGBT* novels.
    Rafe says, one comes out to find a boyfriend. That contradicts his ice cream metaphor. When he meets Clay, everything runs like a clockwork and Rafe acquiesces that as if that’s just what you do, and it was only logical to date Clay. That seems to be quite unemotional, more objective, but not averted. He says, people would stare less, or he would care less if they did, when he had a boyfriend. But these two things are not really linked.
    There are sections in the novel, that—if one were nitpicky—are offensive, even if one wouldn’t expect that from people in that particular scene:
    Isn’t it discriminating, to assume, that faggots are something bad while gays are not, since the former is meant to be an insult and the latter as a rectification?
    Then, to cheer him up, his father tells him, how great he is. Don’t get me wrong: It’s good to reaffirm to your child that it’s a great person the way they are, and you love them no matter what. But I don’t think, this was the right place and time. I would have liked his father to react by telling him that he doesn’t have to lose his temper and get involved in a fight.
    Rafe thanks his mother for the coming-out meal, which first looks like a cool gesture that also comes full circle narratively. But at the same time, it also marks the beginning of his plight: He describes that his mother took his coming-out into her own hands and at the same time took away the opportunity of an internal coming-out from him. To really come full circle, he would have had to explain to his mother, what went wrong back then. It’s not about recrimination, but about the possibility, not just for Rafe—or the reader—to learn from it.
    Foremost, Rafe—pretendedly being straight—doesn’t attend the GSA but decides to do so after his second coming-out. For Rafe, this U-turn might make sense, because only now does he experience his real internal coming-out: To feel safe within the GSA and be able to consider its members friends, quit playing sports, and consider his homosexuality an important part of himself. This might be an important first point of call, but on the other hand, it shows how lapses into clichés—the very ones he distanced himself from. This way, the author relativizes his message, “You don’t have to act gay to be gay”.
    He tells himself, he hasn’t judged Carlton, a GSA meeting attendee. Yet, the way he thinks about his feminine appearance, discriminating in a way. This shows the classic problem that feminine gays are not necessarily accepted by other gays, and that feminine men were gazed at. And this in return emphasizes the fear to appear feminine besides being gay, and what others might think about that.
    But there was one thing, they talked about in the GSA, that reflects what I think about it: It is after all just one of many personality traits, even though there is no point in denying it. If one is just at the beginning of his internal coming-out, gay youth groups might be helpful, but in my opinion, one should not get dependent of them. That’s very similar to what he had in Boulder. Furthermore, he mentioned, taking You-know-Caleb as an example, that gays don’t necessarily like each other just because they are gay. Frankly, I don’t really like sports and jocks like Ben, but in my opinion, that matched partly with Rafe. This part of him just shouldn’t have suppressed the rest of him, and instead could have coexisted. After his coming-out, he just turns his back on that part.
    The end of the novel shows Rafe being back in his hometown Boulder, enjoying its open-mindedness. Thus, he accepts his gilded cage, which he tried to escape. Yet, in my opinion, that last chapter was weak, even though I get the symbolism behind it. I just believe, the author makes a huge mistake this way. Sure, protagonists can and should sometimes be wrong, but hereby he says that the way it was in the beginning was okay and relativizes the critic from the very beginning. The end paints a beautiful moment that actually is everything but, because Rafe just lost his best friend and didn’t seem to have achieved anything with it.
    Conclusion
    Despite the shortcomings in the second half of the novel, the plot is entertaining and socio-critical in the beginning and raises questions for the readers that offer the potential for self-reflectiveness. The growing friendship with Ben and the backstory of Bryce are frankly quite beautiful and emotional to follow along with. Also, Rafe’s diary, annotated by his teacher, gives the novel another dimension.
  13. Zuri

    Review: Center of the World

    By Zuri,


    reviews
    “The Center of the World” is a tessellated coming-of-age youth novel, which is about the 17 years old Phil, who has a crush on Nicholas, who’s a new classmate. Phil and his twin sister Dianne experienced a very different parenting style, practiced by their mother Glass and her friend Tereza, and their mother is well-known to be quite promiscuous in their small town—a fact that doesn’t make life easier for the siblings. Phil’s father (“Number 3”) is somewhere in America and a huge variable in his life.
    Characters
    Especially among the characters, there are good and bad examples: Glass is a well-made character. While the “Little People” (that’s what they call the people in their small town) consider her a bad mother, her clients see her as a tower of strength. She is extremely nonconformist and authentic, but especially because of that, lovely. Even though Phil doesn’t like Pascal, she gives him the best advice because she doesn’t mince her words and romanticize reality. Additionally, there are characters, who don’t really serve the plot and their existence is kind of strange. It almost feels like all of a sudden, a bunch of characters manifested in front of the author’s door and demanded the main role in a sub-plot and the author eventually got roped into it.
    Plot
    Flashbacks might be good additional plot devices; overused, they lame the plot and feel more like lavish stuffing. About half of the scenes in The Center of the World are flashbacks, and so one gets the impression that nothing really happens. The novel also has a lot of side plots with their own climaxes and plot twists, that feels crowded and make the reader lose the overview. Some things happen as a sideline without having any significant meaning to the following plot so that it wouldn’t really bother anyone if they were left out.
    Themes
    Glass raised her children quite laid back and anti-authoritarian, and therefore Phil doesn’t mind nudity or homosexuality. Nonetheless, love turns his head just like it happens to any other teenager. More or less, he only realized on his first date, that it is more complex than this. Especially in this point, the novel isn’t straight-line, but it doesn’t offer any solutions on the other hand. It shows that people who are attracted to each other do not necessarily feel or want the exact same thing. That particular topic would have had a huge potential, but it wasn’t used and is—contrary to the sexual orientation, the author avoided emphasizing—tabooed, especially in youth novels. A lot of novels that deal with (first) love, portray that topic as fairy-tale-like, not to say conservative in a very classic understanding of relationships that isn’t really fitting in our modern-day society. Therefore, there are only really the options “we are heads over ears in love and will be together forever” and “let’s leave that alone in the first place”. The novel also sheds light on Dianne going astray and shows, how she treats Glass and Phil, and they with her. Conflicts are hinted at, but they are more revealed step by step than solved.
    End
    Actually, almost every question that arose during the progression of the plot was answered. But it appears to be almost a game for the author, to ask these very questions en masse. Flashbacks bring the possibility to ask even more questions that Phil couldn’t fully understand as a child, let alone answer or just overlooked crucial details, with them. A lot of these questions don’t need to be necessarily answered to advance the plot, and therefore, it feels like the reader is sent on a scavenger hunt with never-ending mandatory side quests involuntarily. Per se, I like open endings. The author emphasizes in the postface, that the quality of the novel lies in the fact that the reader wants to continue accompanying Phil on his further journey because that’s where his self-discovery would start. If I shared that opinion, it might have been a cachet indeed, but in my opinion enough has been said not only between Phil and Nicholas but also between characters and reader. In the end, it doesn’t matter whether he meets his father or not. The focus on the father also feels like the wrong choice because there are more obvious topics. Of course, here and there, this topic is mentioned, but after Phil’s and Glass' conversation in the library, that chapter really feels closed.
    Postface and sequels
    The author tells us with a certain elevatedness—a trait that many of us authors that are proud of their work have—in the postface about the development of the plot—something, I would have been less likely to notice if I agreed with his opinion. He calls “The Center of the World” a 100-page-long prologue. When reading the postface, I understood some of his stratagems better—I just don’t like them any more than before. The idea of an everlasting prologue and the prompt towards the readers to imagine the story beyond what the book covers might have seemed to be a nice idea, but it just doesn’t work in my opinion. This stratagem feels like a springboard whose length was decreased to 20 % and so the best run-up in the world couldn’t give you enough momentum to cross the gap of the disillusioning plot. Furthermore, he explains to us how he was inspired by Greek mythology. Granted, a lot of Phil's childhood memories feel like fairy tales and this revelation sure was an aha moment, but ultimately it doesn’t enhance the plot. It’s an inspiration, but not more than this. In his opinion, Phil is annoying—a view I sympathize with. Not that much as a character from the reader's perspective—in my opinion, Phil is actually sympathetic—but as a character from an author’s standpoint. He is bystander of his own life. With “Defender – Geschichten aus der Mitte der Welt”, the author delivers a short story collection that should complement the novel. Without reading that sequel, I have the feeling that this might actually be a form where the author’s strengths are and maybe, it would have been wise, to publish the novel in a similar form.
    Conclusion
    The novel gives the impression of a potpourri of a biography (Phil has the urge to tell us about every little detail of his childhood), a novella (internal plot), and many additional short stories, that turn the novel into a compressed form or a series. Despite some lovely characters, marvelously authentic scenes, and the kindling of a gripping plot, the novel couldn’t manage to hide its unwillingness to decide on a text type. There were several wtf moments, that made me consider putting the novel aside without finishing it. With its many flashbacks, the novel appears bloated, but without them and the side plots, the novel appears to be more like warm words.
     
  14. Zuri
    When I found out about my own homosexuality, I was thirteen. I didn’t want people to think, I was a certain way because of my attraction to other men. I insisted on being hetero-like (this concept is similar to cis passing for trans people, as far as I know). But as time went on, I realized that I realized that I had to stop worrying about what other people thought of me. Easier said than done, of course, but at least I took tiny steps in the right direction. Maybe, one day, I won't care about it in the slightest. I still call myself “hetero-like”—which is something I’m totally fine with—but I care less about my gender expression. I have always been a nonconformist and don’t want to play by some rules of society, or I at least dislike them (for example: I’m a man with long hair).
    When I watched the Vogue interview with Troye Sivan, Troye suddenly grabbed the interviewer’s hand and started polishing their nails. Even though I don’t like nail polish, I admired Troye for being that true to himself. That’s what gives me as well the strength to be my true self. Another milestone in that process was when I learned the difference between gender identity and gender expression. That gave me a better feeling, since I now could sort the former from the latter without the fear to question my own gender identity. I’ve been dealing with people telling me “Only girls have long hair”, “That’s unnatural” and “that behavior is so typical for gay men” straight to my face. That might not be true and just words, but it made me think and question and stir my insecurities.
    Interestingly, a friend of mine who happens to be trans and I had a conversation about gender dysphoria the other day, and he asked me if cis people had this feeling, too. Of course, I answered, I didn’t know the exact feeling but some remotely distant ones and that I had my fair share of experiences with body-shaming and lookism.
    About a year ago, a heterosexual man named Mark Bryan went viral on Twitter for his love of wearing a skirt and high heels for work, while at the same time rightly see no contradiction with his gender identity. That emphasizes the statement “cloths do not have a gender”.
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