LeatherNickLondon

Jeff, I’ve been loving this story since it first started in the diner and today you’ve given an example of why. I read the first line of this chapter and just went wow! That line is so evocative, I instantly could feel what it was like for Jamie in that room. It’s simple but so powerful. You’re quite sparing in your writing - precise and without excessive and unnecessary descriptions which makes it a pleasure to read. Indeed, each chapter always leaves me impatient to read the next instalment. Fuck, that sounds like a comment from your English teacher at school but actually is just a long way of me saying thank you 😊

Well, you’d have to go a long way to find a better inspiration for your muse. I’m delighted that more chapters are already in the system coz I can’t wait to read them!

Wow! That’s certainly grabbed my attention! Your writing in this first chapter is so evocative of a painting by Hopper - the desolation, anonymity and loneliness of a late night diner. While Hopper showed us visual beauty in a scene like that, you’ve uncovered a sort of camaraderie and a glimmer of hope. I can’t wait to see where you take us and whether you’ll also reveal some beauty coming out of that diner.

Simply, Wow! I read this story after having read Kingdom of Men with a short break between them and thought I knew what to expect. In one way I did as the standard of writing was just as good but your style of writing here and the atmosphere you created around the narrative was completely different. The story had me gripped from the beginning particularly as you continually had me guessing what sort of story I was reading. What seemed to be a story about failing relationships and clandestine affairs took a number of breath-taking lurches to become at various stages a crime novel, a psychological thriller and almost a horror story. As I first encountered each of these lurches I wasn’t immediately sure if I was going to continue liking the story but your very skillful writing quickly dragged me back in and I was engrossed again. To have achieved that and ended up with a story which still feels unified is amazing. Brilliant.

This was one of the most powerful stories I’ve read for a long time. @CasualWanderer82, you should feel really proud of what you produced. I was totally drawn into the narrative and shared with the emotions of all the characters, but none more so than Bishop. You led me deep into his mind in a way that only rarely happens. I was completely captivated and I know already that I’ll come back and read the whole story again - it absolutely deserves it. Thank you so much.