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Camilo

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Blog Entries posted by Camilo

  1. Camilo
    I've had this lingering thought in the back of my mind, for the longest while. It's been reaffirmed, strengthen at times by some of the things that I read here on GA and as of recently an NPR story that I listened to a week ago. It's the idea that everyone is smart in his/her own level and, given the opportunity, can provide a grounded opinion. In other words, when enable to, a person can produce a creative idea, logical response, or convincing argument. That there aren't just a "set" of people who are smart, creative, and resourceful, but rather everyone is capable of producing something worthwhile.
     
    I kept thinking of this as I listened to an NPR story about "multipliers". People who enable others to shine and prosper. In other words, people who bring out the best in you, whether it is at coming up with educated answers, innovative ideas, and creative problem solving tips. In addition, the story explores people who have the opposite effect on others - "diminishers" (or a word along those lines, can't fully remember it). These are individuals who micromanage everyone around them and hold the believe that there is a set of people who are the smart, creative, and innovative people. The story concludes stating that the main difference between diminishers and multipliers is that the latter believes everyone around them is smart and has the capabilities to solve tough problems.
     
    Do I believe that everyone around me is smart?
     
    I don't know and this "I don't know" makes me wonder even why it is that I can't answer this question. Am I conceited? No and yes. No in the sense that I'm not presumptuous; I do, however, have a mix of inner confidence/ego that makes have an excessively positive opinion of my abilities. Honestly, I do believe that I am better than some people and that I will be successful in life (not money making successful, rather, successful in the goals that I set out to accomplish). I'd like to think that what I feel is self worth, and do admit that it might be pretentious. But truthfully, I don't care.
     
    My mom tells me that she's amazed at how easily things come to me. She means how lucky it seems that everything I want... happens. My grades, my friends, my colleges, my scholarships, and even my love life. Things just happen to fall into place in front of me, and I like it. In just a few months I'll heading off to Swarthmore, one the of most intellectual places in the country. Every thing there is a debate, everyone there was the smartest kid in their class, everyone there has strong educated opinions, and they don't have an off button. I scares me and frustrates me at the same time. I can just picture myself telling a kid to shut the eff up and let me my CoCo Puffs in peace, i don't want to hear about Darfur, I don't want to hear about the dolphins, i don't want to discuss Foucault, all i want to do is eat my CoCo Puffs and think of nothing.
     
    Then there are you guys, the people who post things responses here. I read them and they seem educated, lengthy and thought out. I'm truly amazed at some of the responses, especially in the soap box, because they're thought out. Even some of the responses of people who are newbies make me think. Albeit at some responses I just want to draw a big red X on them, but still. I would say that the responses are smart/creative/and innovative because, well, I think they are. But does it mean that all of you belong to the "set" of smart innovative people who are at the top of their game?
     
    Just by numbers, no. So, why are your responses so well, smart? Could it be that GA serves as "multiplier" and brings out the best in you? Bringing out your creative, smart, and innovative side?
     
    Maybe after all, everyone has the potential to be smart and creative?
     
    Is everyone smart?
     
    I don't know. Maybe.
     
    *goes back to sleep*
     
     
  2. Camilo
    Um....let's see. Well this is the second blog entry, and I'm tired lol. Opps! I mean I'm tired physically and mentally today, not of the blog, 'cause like who can get tired when they talked about me. I know, I know, it was bad on my part and I apologize, hehe. Ok, Just kidding! But I am tired...well that's not the right word, let's see...I'm not in "energizer bunny" mode.
     
    OH TODAY IS MY 18TH BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
    I can barely believe it! I'm 18 already and that's like I'm 18 already! OMG, what to do first, what to do first? Go buy a porn magazine? Buy a lottery ticket? Go to a strip club? AHH!!!!! I don't know what to do first!
     
    Sadly I can't really do all that stuff today since I have to attend my school NHS Mass (National Honors Society Mass, I'm I don't really know what NHS has to do with a mass.) But like I'm getting a Book Award for something but I don't know yet, and I really really really want to KNOW! So it's today at 6 and I have nothing else to do. Oh but at school, I was driving to the parking lot and a big cut out of Stewie said "Happy 18th birthday Camilo!" I almost freaked out! Some of my friends had gotten it together before school.
     
    So tomorrow I leave for Williams College, which is like a 3 day sleep over trip, so yay! I want to see if I fit in and how much fun I can have there! I just know that I'm going to end with a great dorm host. I already know his name! The only bad thing is that I'm the only one from CT. The rest are like from FL and CA and TX and those areas. Haha yeah yeah, CA and FL aren't really that close.
    So anyway, it's going to be sooooooooooooooooooooooo much fun and I get to hang out with college kids and stuff! Plus just imagine the eye candy!!!!!!!!!!
     
    Sigh....I can't wait.
     
    So let's see, apparently giving your best friend advice whether or not to shave his pubes is considered "cheating". I know! I mean, I was only asking for an honest opinion, it's not like I shook my package in front of his face and told him to have a taste. Tsk, tsk tsk, some people really have trust problems. And worse of all, now his boyfriend hates me completely...well he did from the start, but now he like REALLY REALLY REALLY hates me, lol. How was I suppose to know that greeting his boyfriend with "hey sexy" and "hi cutie" would tick him off. Whatever, and I even had a cute name for the boyfriend, "Mikey-I-Likey". Well, you know what, now he's just Mike.
     
    Oh, the whole pube thing...um that's strictly about swimming and yeah....
     
    OH! So the next blog, once I come back and have time, will be about one of my best friends Skyler who lives in Illinois. And segments will include stories ranging from, "getting beaten by the ugly stick" to "how to have sex with a Care Bear."
     
    So BON CHANCE you guys,
    Camilo
  3. Camilo

    My Sinking Ship.....

    By Camilo,


    Camilo
    Hmmm, I like to think that I have an awesome mother, and and awesome brother, yay! So it would only seem logical that living with only my mom and brother would be just peachy, wouldn't it. Well, it's not..... They're great and all, but it seems that problems on top of problems just keep on circling us. My dad is pretty much being an asshole and keeps on doing stupid shit when I'm trying to strengthen the relationship that I have with him. But, I can't summon up the courage to tell him "Hey f**ker! What you did is messed up! You don't do that, you lied and you are wrong!"
     
    My brother is in his own little world, playing Call of Duty all the time and watching stuff online. Me, I'm the same, in my own little world with my boyfriend, school, friends, and college stuff. My mom, she's in her own world, with her boyfriend. It's not all that bad, I tend to over dramatize things. Life is getting tougher for us, I guess I never thought that the whole "single mom" thing would effect us. I mean, when problems hit, there is only one parent to handle them. And in my case, a parent and the oldest son to hold down the fort. Which leads me to my title........
     
    My mom is having a hard time accepting the fact that I will leave for college. She wants me to go and wants me to excel, but at the same time, she doesn't want to part with me. She asked me why I wanted to attend college so far away (Providence, RI, to her that is half a world away, sigh...) and I told her that I wanted to experience college and that I no longer wanted to live here.....with all this drama. That led to an argument between me and her, and for those who know me, I adore my mother, so so so much. She then accused me of wanting to quit and "leave when a better opportunity presents itself" just like my father, which is what he did. Now that I think about it, it's true. In some way, I am just like a sailor abandoning a sinking ship.
  5. Camilo

    ! Soy yo ! Otra vez

    By Camilo,


    Camilo
    Well it's blog time!!!!
     
    I haven't written a blog entree in a while now, so here I go. The first thing I have to say is F U C K!!!!!!
     
    I'm so pissed! I just found out that the biggest rich, spoiled, emotionless, hated by everyone, sexist, and overall jerk Sean is also applying to Williams (my top school) !!!! Listen to this, the reason he is going to Williams is because "Williams has the hottest girls!" it's not a question of whether he will take my spot or not, most likely he and I will both get in. But going to the same 2,000 student college with that asshole!!!!!
     
    On a better note, I saw RuPaul's Drag Race for the first time, yay! I liked it and I thought it was funny and awesome. I remember that a year ago I would not have felt comfortable watching; I might have even felt akward watching a guy dress up as a girl. Well, now it doesn't do anything, lol. I kind of think it's cool. Hehe, now I understand the whole "expression/comfortable with one's self/openess" thing. Truthfully, I just thought it was a stupid hippie idea and that it was all BS. Hehe, but it's not, I get it now.
  6. Camilo
    So this is are a few recaps about homosexuality and me. Chiefly the fact that it appears everywhere around me. You know, I bet when I come out, nothing around me will remind me of it. That's just how things are; when you don't wan to think about it, it's everywhere and when you are ready for it, it's nowhere to be found,
  7. Camilo

    Oh funk me!

    By Camilo,


    Camilo
    Um let's see...I'm in a funk right now. Sigh, I know like, it was supposed to be a "Skyler the slut" blog entry, lol. Hehe, just kidding Skyler (since you're probably are reading this, when I say slut, I mean it in a good way!) oh and also goes for you reader people, Sky is a really good guy, hehe I'm just teasing him 'cause were "Besties"...yeah, name - totally Skyler's idea (yeah, he's uber gay and since I'm also gay I can make fun of his super duper gayness...lol, his dream job = weeding planner. Yes Skyler, I remember that talk, ) And I can't really say anything more about him or the "other guy", since I kinda screwed up...oops!
     
    Ahhh! I so want to talk about the car seat incident but I can't!!!! Argh! It would be immoral and stupid of me to say it here. But now you guys know; there's a car incident. Ok Cam, you are not making any sense right now!
     
    Back to my funk, so I just visited Williams College and stayed from Thursday until Saturday. Let's see, that's pretty much the reason for my funk. I hate it so much but I love it with a passion at the same time! f**k!!! Why does it have to be so good sometimes and be in such a shitty place!
     
    Ok, the good part: it is AWESOME!!!!!! Academics: Ivy league or even better. People: nicest most enthusiastic and energetic people you can ever meet. Dorms: Entry system of communal living = guaranteed best friends.
     
    Bad things: f**king middle of no-where!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah, at first the purple cow seemed quirky and fun, but now I realize that there is nothing to see but cows. Then there's the whole gay thing!
     
    Let's do some math:
     

    2,200 total X 50 % male population = 1,100 guys



    1,100 guys X Gay stat (about 8%) = 88 gay guys



    88 gay dudes X actual cuties (40 %) = 35 cute gay guys






    Just imagine, only 35 possible people to hook up with and you're in the middle of nowhere atop a mountain FOR 4 YEARS. And this isn't counting the fact that some of them will be in the closet or taken !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
    So that's why I'm in such a funk, it's a great school, but come on! The only thing I see is trees! Argh! 4 years, here?
     
    Anyway, I wish I could just say that I won't consider Williams, but it's such a great school! Ok, enough, I'm done freaking out.
     
    There are way more things that I have to say, but they can't be posted publicly, lol.
     
    Ummm, I'm not even gonna say that I'll talk about Skyler next time, 'cause I forget, lol. Besides, you guys don't need to get to know that skank, you guys should just stay with good ole' Camilo. Haha, oh I'm so gonna hear it from Skyler when he reads this. But hey, I said I was going to talk about him, I never said that it would be good
     
    Hehe, but on a serious note...OMG IM 18! I just remembered...back to the seriousness, Skyler is a great guy, caring, loyal, and trustworthy. It's great to have him as a friend.
     
    I should go now, my roommate for the night is doing a 13 x 13 Rubik's cube and solving it. Sigh
  8. Camilo

    Meh....

    By Camilo,


    Camilo
    Well...I feel like shit both physically and mentally. I don't know but it's been a bad last two weeks and I really can't wait until this week is over and go bond with some of my classmates at a weeklong retreat. It'll be awesome.
     
    Anyway, I guess this is like writing therapy or something like that
  9. Camilo
    Hey, f**ktard! Yeah, you! You f**ker!
     
    How are you buddy, how's it hanging? (Mwahaha, *Camilo laughs at a joke no one else gets but he does so that's all that matters*)
     
    Hehe, well I truly forgot pretty much about every single online friend that I have. Well, I got my typical excuse, I was soooooooooo busy,
     
    It's true! I really have no time to do shit! Plus college applications are starting and it's one of the most painful processes you can ever go through. First, you have to take the SAT's, then you have to write a damn good essay, then you have to do extremely well first quarter grade wise, then you have to kiss ass so that your teachers give you a great recommendation. Yeah, I'm applying early Action to two of my safety school so that needs to get done before November 1.
     
    Ok, see you still don't believe me, so here's a typical week for me...yeah, I want to talk more about it 'cause it's talking about me, and no one gets tired of hearing about Camilo, plus I'm a huge egotistic asshole, hehe ok that last part was a lie....I'm an egotistic dick! JK,
     
    Monday:
     
    Wake up 7:00 am
    Hurry and barely make it to my car at 7:50
    Get to school and run to locker: 8:30
    Greet friends and teachers: 8-837
    Run to class and get there at 8:40 right before the bell rings. [Yeah that's usually my morning which never changes unless I have to tutor someone before school]
     
    School 8:40 - 2:30
     

    Lunch Meeting for Freshman Retreat (yeah, every Monday I have to sit with the other 3 co-captains and plan activities for the freshman class, sigh at least Scott is there with me.)
     

    Leave school and take brother home, 2:30 - 3:20
     

    3:20 - 6:00 Mandatory community service every single Monday for the rest of the year if I want to graduate (I typed this out-loud while saying every single word and then adding a 30 second pause in between, to make a point of course.)
     
    6-7:30 Land Practice for Rowing. Yeah since I'm not actually rowing this season (not enough time) I need to run and strength train every single day!
     

    7:30 - Whenever : Do all the homework and shit I have to do for school
     

    In between homework and sleep: Watch porn and jack off, talk to friends, watch stupid videos on the computer, not do my homework and chat with random people online and then realized it's really really late and that I have to read two f**king long chapters ALL IN FRENCH which makes me realize that my French teacher is such a bitch and I hate her but then after a while I realized that she's actually doing her job and preparing us for the AP exam and then I feel bad because I called her a cold heartless bitch who needs to get f**ked more often but then I also realized that she's married to my Math teacher who is a beast so she probably gets pounded like every day and then I check the clock and realized that I could have read a full chapter instead of thinking random thoughts.
     
    Whenever - Tuesday : sleep in my huge bed,
     
    Tuesday
     
    Morning stuff
     
    School 8 - 3 pm
     

    Get home and full around until I have to pick up my mom (she's into car pulling and something about saving the environment) at 4:30 p.m.
     
    Drop her off and then head back to school because i have to lead a meeting about the freshman retreat and it last from 5- 7 pm
     
    7: - whenever: do all that shit I have to do and lots of homework because I'm in 5 AP classes
     
    Wednesday
    Moring stuff
     
    School and stuff
     

    Debate society and Yearbook so I leave for home like at 5
     

    Land practice and then do homework plus maybe do stuff with friends
     
    Thursday
     
    Probably the busiest day because I have school and then I have a lunch meeting then I have a afterschool meeting for Kairos and then I have to work on yearbook followed by Land practice when I get home and then homework
     
    Friday
     
    Usually test day at my school
     
    Get held up at school usually till 3:30, don't ask why, hehe some teachers want to talk to me and sometimes I just happened to wonder into rooms and just hang out.
     
    Land practice when I get home
     
    After home it's a free for all and different stuff happens on Friday nights
     
    Weekends
     
    Yeah, they're random and fun, but I can't really tell you about them.
     
    OK, so now imagine that you did all of that and then on top of that you have to write your story and if you're like me, then you are a really slow author. So now, don't you think that being busy is a good excuse, hehe.
     
    Anyway, like stuff happened during these last few days, but I'll tell you about it later. Hehe, I went to my first college party! And spent 3 days in college seeing what it's like!
     
    Oh and I broke up with my boyfriend!
     
    C ya,
    Camilo
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