Black Sheep Part 2 - 8. Chapter 8

The whispering begins as soon as I get onto the school grounds. People stare and stare, stepping out of the way when I get close. I stand still and look around, wondering what it is they think they know. I park my bike and scan the grounds for Mike. Hopefully the guy showed up for the first hour of class today. I don't see Mike anywhere so I walk into the school building. More people keep stepping out of my way and I catch some of the whispers going on around me.

“---heard his parents kicked him out because---”

“---I heard he beat up Vic---”

“---he is crazy---”

“---his parents think he tried to kill Vic---”

I forgot how many people know who Vic is. Of course being one of the first Goth guys at the school might have had something to do with it. I walk slightly faster to the classroom, trying to get out of the buzzing of the crowd. When I walk into the class I see Mike sit at his usual desk. I sigh and sit down next to him.

Before he can ask me anything I ask, “What are the rumours?”

Mike grins. “The fun ones, the ridiculous ones or the near truth ones?”

“Fun ones, not sure if I want to know the rest of them.”

“I think the one I found the funniest was that Vic is kicked out of his house because he got some girl pregnant and you beat him up because you found out and the suicide is a cover up.”

“That doesn't even make sense.” I frown. “It's quite sad really.”

“Most of them are amongst the lines of you getting kicked out by your parents for being outed by Vic and that is why you beat him up.”

“Well, that seems less troublesome than the truth.” I sit back as more people get into the room. The staring and whispers are not stopping and I feel my chest tighten. I've been in the same class with these people for years and none of them actually dare to ask me anything? Marie walks in and looks at me for a couple of seconds before she turns away. She looks awful, her eyes are red and she has no make-up on.

I prod Mike. “What's up with her?”

“I heard she is the one spreading some of the more crazy rumours. Sorry, I know you used to be good friends. But right now, she is trying to bring you down so bad.”

“Why? I haven't done anything wrong. She played the both of us.”

“I don't know. Just, try to ignore her.”

“Yeah, I guess.”

“So, what are you planning on doing on Valentines day?” Mike sits on top of the table and pushes his pack of cigarettes to me.

“Go to school? I don't know, I don't think I'll be able to see him. They won't let any of us see him right now.” I grab my bag and pull out a bottle of water. I balance it on the edge of the table before I put it back into my bag.

“When did they say you can see him again?”

“When he is getting better, there is no say when that will be.” We keep quiet for a while. I pick up the pack and take out a cigarette. “I don't even know if I want to see him right now.”

“Why? You love him don't you? You're not gonna...” Mike doesn't need to finish his sentence, instead opting for lighting our cigarettes.

“No, no. I do love him. I'm just not sure if I can handle seeing him down like that.” I take a drag. “If he even wants to see me.” I add as an afterthought.

“Why do you think that? Of course he wants to see you.”

“He refused to eat. They're force feeding him now because they think it's another way of killing himself. If he'd just eaten we would have been able to visit him already.”

“I didn't... Wow. How are you holding on like this? I would have stayed at home, if it were me.”

“I can't stay at home all day. Vic's family are nice and all, but I sometimes need a bit of a change. I can't just depend on them constantly. Also...” I trail off, reality still far from real.

“What?”

“I need to keep attending and I need to keep my grades up. Otherwise they might get in trouble for me moving in. If I keep everything up they might let me move in with Steve and Sarah.” There, there it was. The real reason for going to school when I would rather hide in my room. Correction, Vic's room. I stare in the distance almost missing Mikes next question.

“Why would Vic's family be against you moving in with your brother and sister?”

“Not them, I mean the system. They are going to talk to my parents first, to see if they change their mind and let me move back in. Not that they ever would. If that doesn't work out Vic's mum will sign the papers so I can live there until Steve and Sarah have their own place. But if I mess up, they might put me into the system until I'm 18. I don't want to risk that.” I take another drag, holding my breath for a couple of seconds and then slowly let the smoke rise from my mouth.

“Sounds like you could really use a bit of time off.”

“I know, but I can't. If I don't keep moving I will only feel worse.”

“Can't you like... Talk to Adam or something?”

I shake my head, keeping another breath, revelling in the warmth and itch of the smoke.

“Okay, forget I asked.”

“He has enough trouble trying to stay alive himself.” I sigh, wondering how I got into all this mess. Even though everything seemed fine with Vic and me, everything around us had been crumbling down already.

“Like I said. Forget I asked. But if you ever need a place to get away from it all, I'm here for you. You can always crash at my place.”

“Thanks.” I put out the cigarette and look at the school doors. “I think it's time to go back inside.”