Alex and Zach - 1. Chapter 1

"Alex! Watch out! There’s a deer in the road!"

"Shit! Zach - we’re gonna hit him!"

Alex frantically tried to swerve around the deer, but it had been sleeting and snowing all day and the road was much too slick. Suddenly, there was a horrible lurch and the sound of shattering glass and screeching metal as the car slammed into the deer. The force of the impact combined with the slippery conditions forced the vehicle off the road and over the embankment, rolling the car completely over.

Alex couldn’t believe how fast it had all happened. Almost in a dazed state he began looking around and realized that he and Zach were hanging upside down, held in place by the seatbelts and shoulder straps. "Zach, are you ok?"

There was a few seconds pause and then, barely audible, Zach whispered back, "I… don’t…. think…. so….."

****

The entire situation had started the day before. It was Zachary’s birthday and Alex had planned on getting a few friends and taking Zach out to eat and maybe a few beers to celebrate. Originally Alex had wanted to throw a full- fledged party, but Zach had figured out his plans and stopped him. Not even pleas that it would be the perfect end to the semester before everyone went home for Christmas break swayed Zach. So Alex had scaled his plans way back even though he really wanted to do something special for his roommate.

Alex and Zachary were best friends and had been since the beginning of the semester. They were both Juniors but new to the college having transferred just that year. Actually Alex had become fascinated with Zach within moments of meeting him standing in line waiting for their room assignments. Everything about Zach seemed to intrigue him more. Zach was a little over six feet and had a lean but muscular body and dark, almost black hair. His chest filled out the faded T-shirt and you could almost make out the cut between his defined pecs and count the ridges in his abs. Since Zach was wearing shorts Alex was able to see his legs were also well toned. It wasn’t just that Zach was good looking though, his personality was equally appealing. Zach was quiet and shy, but once you got him talking he revealed a warm sense of humor, a genuine compassion and a quick, intelligent mind. His shy smile would light up his entire face and his eyes almost seemed to sparkle. Alex found himself wanting to just stare for hours into those deep blue eyes, and that only confused him that much more.

Alex couldn’t help but compare himself to Zachary. Alex wasn’t conceited, but he knew that he was fairly good looking too. But there were quite a few differences between the two. Where Zach had dark hair, Alex had blond, almost beach bum hair. He had good muscle tone, but it was packed on a lean swimmer’s body and not nearly so muscular as Zach’s. Even their personalities were different. Alex was always outgoing, talkative, and fun loving. Most of his friends considered him the life of the party and he was always joking and laughing. Despite their differences, the two shared several similar interests and got along great.

The college they were attending was notorious for overcrowding the dorms and so they found themselves as part of a quad in a room barely big enough for one, let alone four. Within two days Alex had had enough and asked Zach if he would want to share an apartment with him. Alex was a little nervous asking Zach since he knew he would have trouble hiding his growing attraction for his new friend, but at the same time he really wanted to spend as much time as he could with Zach and get to know him even better. Alex’s feelings for Zach were beginning to confuse the hell out of him. He had never become so completely attached to anyone before. And the fact that it was happening so quickly simply made his mind whirl.

Zach jumped at the chance to move out and seemed just as eager as Alex to share an apartment with his new friend. Zach’s enthusiastic acceptance of the offer made Alex both happy and even more nervous at the same time. Although Zach seemed to enjoy spending time together as much as he did, Alex couldn’t help feeling a little strange with the whole situation. His past friendships had always been warm, but usually pretty casual. Although he was fun and outgoing, the kind of guy most people instantly liked, he had never really been close with anyone. With Zach, Alex found himself wanting to open up, to share his thoughts and feelings, and that probably scared and confused him more than anything.

Still, Alex really wanted to get out of the dorms. He determined that he would just have to deal with his tangled emotions and besides, maybe things would get easier and less confusing with the passage of a little time. With space so limited, campus housing was more than happy to refund the dorm fees since it meant freeing up some space. And so a week later the two found themselves sharing a one bedroom apartment within walking distance of the campus and becoming closer friends every day.

The semester had seemed to fly by and the two were nearly inseparable. Now the semester was nearly over, finals were complete and the campus was getting ready to close. Zachary’s birthday was December 20 and Alex thought it would be perfect for everybody to get together and celebrate before they all went home. Even though Zach didn’t want a full-blown party, Alex was determined to make the day special. Unfortunately, Zach had seemed very low-spirited and tense all day. He kept moping about the apartment, not really accomplishing anything and resisting all efforts to engage him in conversation. When Alex asked what was wrong, Zach would only mumble that he was just tired. When six o’clock rolled around Alex practically had to drag Zach to the restaurant. Zach seemed to be attempting to put up a good front, but everybody noticed and privately asked Alex what was up. It almost seemed that Zach was about ready to cry. All through the evening Zach’s friends kept trying to get him to celebrate but without any luck. He barely even touched his food even though they were eating at his favorite restaurant and he didn’t have a single drink. Alex wasn’t really surprised about Zach’s not drinking since he rarely drank at all even at parties. It was only eight when Zach said his goodbye’s to everyone, apologizing that he was tired and wishing everyone a Merry Christmas.

Alex couldn’t understand what was going on. Normally Zach would talk to him if something were wrong, but not tonight. Once they got back to the apartment, Zach checked their mailbox, which was empty, and then checked their answering machine for messages. There were a few calls from campus friends calling before they left to say goodbye and Merry Christmas. Zach smiled kind of wistfully at a couple of the messages, but didn’t really seem very interested. After the last of the messages played he told Alex he was going to go ahead and go to bed and wished him goodnight.

Alex knew something was wrong but he just couldn’t get his friend to talk about it. It was so frustrating! If Zachary would only talk to him maybe he could help, but Alex just didn’t know what to do with silence. Frustrated and worried Alex sat up for a few hours trying to figure out what had happened to upset his friend but nothing came to mind. Finally Alex gave up and went to bed himself. He was determined that he was going to get Zach to talk tomorrow even if he had to drag it out of him.

The next day Zachary seemed even worse. His eyes were constantly watery as if he was fighting back the tears and only just barely keeping them in. He wouldn’t talk and he wouldn’t eat. Alex knew he was beginning to sound like a nag, but he just couldn’t let it go. He had to find out what was wrong. The day dragged on with little change until a little after two in the afternoon when Zach suddenly went to the fridge and grabbed a beer. Alex was really surprised since Zach rarely drank. During the entire semester Alex could only remember Zachary drinking twice and both times just a single beer. Not today though. Zach downed the first beer while standing at the refrigerator door and immediately grabbed another. Zach drank that one like a man with the sole intention of getting very drunk. Within just a few minutes he was back at the refrigerator grabbing another beer.

After drinking six beers within the space of a half an hour, Zachary was definitely more than a little buzzed. Suddenly he turned to Alex, swaying a little on his feet. "I think I’ll go for a drive Alex. I need to clear my head."

"Zach you can’t drive! You can barely stand. There’s no way I’m letting you drive while you are in that condition. Not only that, but its been sleeting all day. You try to drive in that while your drunk and you’re going to kill yourself or worse."

"I need to get out of here for awhile Alex. I’m going crazy in here!" Zach’s voice was almost pleading and had a definite edge to it.

Alex couldn’t really understand why Zach was so agitated all at once, but he was just happy his friend was talking. If he could keep him talking for awhile, maybe he could get him to open up and tell him what was wrong. "Alright, we’ll go driving, but you are going to be a passenger. I’ll do the driving. And don’t argue with me! Get your coat."

For a minute Zach looked like he was about to punch his friend. Alex had never seen him get so mad but he wasn’t about to back down. Alex stared right back into Zach’s eyes daring him to argue. After just a few seconds, Zach looked away, sighed and hung his head. Then he dug in his pockets and handed Alex his keys. Alex took them even though he was planning on taking his own car and not Zach’s, but Alex didn’t want to make his friend feel even more stupid. Not really trusting himself to speak, Alex grabbed their coats and handed Zach his. Alex headed for his car with Zach following dejectedly behind.

They drove around the campus for thirty minutes or so and then around town, not really going anywhere, just driving aimlessly, still in silence. After driving around town for the fifth time and wasting another hour, Alex headed out for the interstate. After about another twenty minutes of silence Alex decided to try again to get Zach to talk. "Zach, what’s wrong? You’ve been acting so strange for the last two days. You never get mad, you never drink and you won’t talk to me. Did I piss you off or something?"

Zach looked down into his lap for a few seconds and Alex was afraid that he wasn’t going to say anything at all. "No Alex, I’m not mad at you. I’m just really tired. I’m sorry I’ve been such an ass." Zach’s voice was so quiet he could barely be heard.

Alex wasn’t fooled for a second. He knew that it had to be more than just his friend being tired, but he was scared to push too much. He wanted to keep Zach talking, but he knew that if he kept nagging, Zach would just shut him out completely. Alex was quiet for a few minutes and then he decided to try a different approach. "So do you have big plans for your Christmas break? Is your family going to celebrate your birthday when you get back home?"

Zachary quickly looked out the passenger side window, but before he could get completely turned away, Alex saw a tear streak down his friend’s face. Zach was silent for just a second or two. "Nah. My mom and dad are going to my brother’s for Christmas this year. I should get home in just enough time to miss saying goodbye as they leave." Zach sounded real casual when he said that but he was still staring out the side window. Just by the change in his friend’s tone Alex knew that this was a bigger deal than Zach was letting on.

"You aren’t going with them?"

"Nope. They are planning on staying down there for a couple of weeks. They haven’t seen Mike and his wife for a couple of years now so they are taking some vacation time so they can stay for awhile. Next semester is going to start before they are planning on getting back and the whole logistics just wasn’t going to work out for me. Besides, I really need to start on next semester’s workload. It’s going to be a pretty heavy load for me this time."

"Well are they at least going to eat a piece of birthday cake with you before they go?" Alex was starting to sound really pissed. He couldn’t believe that Zach’s parents were just going to leave him during Christmas. He couldn’t imagine his family doing something so cold.

Zachary still hadn’t turned around from staring out the window. "Oh, they probably forgot it was my birthday. They have been really busy trying to get everything ready for the trip and with it being the holidays, things are just that much more hectic."

Finally it dawned on Alex. Zachary hadn’t received anything from his parents for his birthday. Not a card, not a gift, not even a stinking phone call. He had been distracted and moping all day yesterday because he kept expecting to get something from them. At least a call. Alex remembered that the very last thing Zach had done last night before going to bed was to check the phone messages. He had been hoping right up to the very last minute. He was suddenly so pissed at these people that he wanted to scream. How could they forget their son like that?

Alex’s face was turning red he was so mad. Without even thinking he suddenly yelled "That FUCKING SUCKS!!! What the hell is wrong with your parents!"

Zach turned towards his friend a little surprised by the sudden outburst. Alex could see that even though Zach had been talking in a normal tone of voice, he had still been silently crying. Zach stared at Alex for a couple of seconds as he realized his friend had figured out why he had been so upset. "Well…they just forgot is all. Really it’s ok. It was kind of stupid of me to let it bother me so much, but it’s ok. I’ve always known that Mike was their favorite so I’m kind of use to it by now. It’s no big deal."

"Zach, it is a big deal. And if it was me, I’d probably be screaming about now. Hell, I’m already yelling and pissed as hell and it happened to you, not me. Damn, no wonder you didn’t feel like celebrating last night."

"Well…like I said, it’s ok. I’ll get over it. I’m just being stupid is all."

"Oh fuck that. I’ll tell you what. You come home with me and spend Christmas Break with my dad and brothers. They’ll drive you nuts, God know they do me, and our cooking may poison you but at least you wont be alone."

"Thanks Alex, but I’ll be ok. Really. Besides, why should my problems ruin your family’s holiday?" Suddenly something ahead caught Zach’s eye.

"Alex! Watch out! There’s a deer in the road!"

"Shit! Zach - we’re gonna hit him!"

****

Alex was nearly hysterical as the paramedics quickly wheeled the gurney with Zach into the Emergency Room. Several doctors were already working on his friend even as they wheeled him into a room and Alex was nearly overwhelmed by the questions being asked by the paramedics, doctors and nurses. His mind just couldn’t focus and he had no idea if his responses were even making sense. The only thought running through his mind was that his best friend was hurt, and hurt badly. Zach had been in so much pain that he had finally just passed out within minutes of the accident. And worse, he couldn’t help thinking that it was his fault. He had been the one driving, and now Zachary, his best friend, a guy who was probably closer to him than his own brothers, was terribly hurt.

"Alex, what happened? Are you ok?" Alex turned at the familiar voice but for a moment all he saw was another doctor asking more questions that he couldn’t possibly answer. Then it finally registered on his dazed and confused brain that the doctor standing in front of him was his dad. Suddenly overwhelmed, Alex started sobbing and his dad quickly pulled him close into a tight hug. For several minutes Alex couldn’t speak and his father continued to hold him, supporting him as the sobbing spasms wracked his body.

Finally, Alex regained a margin of control although tears continued to stream down his face. "Dad, Zach and I were driving and I wrecked the car. I hit a deer and ran off the road and we must have flipped the car and Zach is hurt really bad and I heard the paramedics say his leg was shattered and he has deep cuts and he was bleeding so much and he’s got a cut on his head and he could barely breath or talk and he passed out and……"

In order to calm his distraught son, Alex’s dad began speaking to his son slowly and quietly. "Sshhh, Alex. Slow down. Here, sit down. Take some deep breaths. The desk nurse called me and told me you were here but that you wouldn’t let them check you and you were acting a little wild. You’ve got to let them look at you son. You might be hurt and not know it. I’ll go check on Zachary, but you have to let the nurses and doctors look at you. You were in the accident too. We need to make sure that you are ok and we need to let them treat your cuts and bruises. While they are doing that, I’ll go find out what is going on with Zachary. Ok?"

"Dad, I want to go too. I’ve got to see Zach! I’m ok, I just want to know what they are doing to Zach!"

"Son, I know you do, but we need to make sure you are really ok. I can find out what is happening with your friend while you are getting looked at. Besides, you need to calm down before you go into see Zachary and this will give you some time to pull yourself together a little bit. Ok? Just let the nurse look at you and bandage you up."

Alex slumped back in his chair, weakly nodding his head. The adrenaline rush that had got him this far was quickly beginning to fade. He watched his dad speak briefly with one of the nurses and then enter the emergency room where they were treating Zach. He wanted so badly to follow his dad in there to see for himself what was happening. The fear of what was happening to Zach was knotting his stomach making him feel like he was about to vomit.

After a couple of moments one of the nurses came over to him. She very gently started to check his injuries, the entire time speaking quietly and calmly as if to a small child. Alex barely paid attention to her as she continued the exam, answering her questions but clearly not even aware of what he was telling her. For all he knew they could have been talking about the weather, politics or even that a volcano was about to erupt. The nurse finished treating his cuts and bruises and quietly left him sitting still unaware that she had ever been there.

Alex leaned his head back against the wall and closed his eyes. He was just so keyed up and yet totally drained at the same time. Flashes of memory kept going through his mind. It started with scenes from the accident, but slowly he started remembering the past few months he had spent with Zach. Remembering the past was strangely comforting for him. Oddly the memory of the first night Zach and he had spent in their apartment started playing through his mind.

***

They had found, looked at, and taken the apartment during lunch on Friday of their first week at college. The place was right next to the campus so they could easily still be part of campus life while not having to put up with dormitory living. It was really fairly nice considering it was clearly available for student renting. The only problem was it was pretty small. The place was really just a small house divided to make two small apartments. The entire apartment was just a kitchen/living room area, a bathroom, and a single bedroom. Still it was clean and reasonably priced. Alex just wished he could convince himself that he wasn’t so nervous about living in such tight quarters with Zach. It was going to be really hard to hide his attraction to his new buddy, especially since he was going to be sleeping practically within arm’s reach.

After classes they had quickly gathered their belongings and started moving into their new place. Zach had seemed so excited and his boyish grin got bigger and bigger with each trip they made from their cars hauling in their stuff. Not that they really had a whole lot to move in, but the two of them kept getting rowdier with each trip and the loads seemed to get smaller. In reality they could have probably finished in just a few minutes but they were having such a good time, deliberately getting in each other’s way, tackling each other, wrestling in the yard and just generally making asses of themselves. It ended up taking them several hours and by the time they finally got everything inside they really didn’t feel like putting anything away. Instead they just piled everything against the walls and left themselves a generally clear area in the middle.

"I don’t know about you, but I’m starved! And I really don’t feel like going out now. Do you just want to order a pizza?"

"Well, we could do that Alex, just as soon as you figure out how to make a disconnected phone work!"

"Shit, I didn’t think about that. Maybe the neighbors will let us borrow their phone. I’ll go ask. What do you want on it? No anchovies though. I can’t stand anchovies!"

"I’ll eat pretty much anything on pizza. I’ll come with you though. I think I know one of the guys in the next apartment from class. That might make it easier to bum their phone from them."

The two walked over to the other side of the house and knocked. After a few seconds the door opened. Always one just to insert himself into any situation and be totally comfortable, Alex just walked right in. "Hi. We just moved in next door. I’m Alex and he’s Zach. We were wondering if we could borrow your phone to order a pizza? Do you mind?"

Their neighbor just started laughing as he was more or less forced to back up and let Alex in. "Hey, I’m James. Help yourself to the phone. Oh, and come on in."

Zach just shook his head at his friend. "Sorry about Alex. We haven’t quite taught him the meaning of tact, timing or asking before you let yourself in yet. We thought we’d start with basics like walking upright and grooming before we got to really hard concepts." Alex just flipped his friend off even as he was dialing the phone.

"Hmm. Well I see you have your work cut out for you then. He is house broken isn’t he? I really don’t need any puddles in the corners."

"Alex, are you housebroken yet? I keep forgetting to ask and I must admit I have noticed you standing next to trees a lot lately. You’ll bark or something when you need to go out won’t you?"

Grinning, Alex flipped them both off again as he continued talking on the phone. Making sure he had both of their attentions, he hiked his leg like a dog getting ready to take a piss.

Zach was really laughing now. "You can swat him on the nose if you want. Do you want to join us? I promise I won’t let him lick your face, jump in your lap or hump your leg."

"That’s awfully nice of you. I hate it when someone humps my leg! Thanks anyway, but I was actually just about to leave. I’m suppose to be meeting my roommate over at Lakey’s tavern."

Alex finished his conversation and hung up. "Contrary to what this dickhead says, I only hump someone’s leg if they ask me really nice. Thanks for letting us use your phone. Are you sure you don’t want to stick around? I ordered an extra large so there should be plenty."

"It sounds good, but Dave will kill me if I just ditch him. I’m suppose to be his wingman in case he happens to meet any attractive women who are interested. Not much chance of that. I keep telling him he needs a whole flight crew not just a wingman, but he keeps hoping!" They all laughed as they walked out the door and Alex and Zach returned to their apartment.

The pizza arrived shortly and the two stuffed themselves even while continuing to horse around. Alex felt so great just being around Zach. He felt so close to Zach, it was almost like he was one of his brothers, but even better. In the back of his mind he knew he was getting much too attached to his new friend. The attraction he felt for him also made him really nervous, but excited at the same time. He had never had this kind of reaction to anyone before, not even any of the girls he had ever dated had ever made him feel this way. Alex wasn’t really sure if he was really ready to open that particular door yet, or even if he would ever be.

They continued talking and joking with each other until after 1 AM. Zach had been yawning for awhile and it was pretty obvious he was about ready to fall asleep. "Alex, I’m beat. I’m going to bed. Besides, we should get up early tomorrow so we can go pick up your spare furniture. Are you sure your Dad won’t mind?"

"Dad’s pretty happy to get it out of the garage. I called him between classes just to make sure it was ok and that my brothers hadn’t already made claim to any of it. My older brother, Mark, wants some of it, but Dad said there was still a couch and chair, a couple of beds and dressers and a table we can use in the kitchen. No chairs for it though. I’m afraid the beds are just singles, but we probably couldn’t get anything bigger in that dank little closet were calling a bedroom anyway."

"Hey! Is that anyway to talk about our Master Bedroom? It’s really quite spacious, just as long as we never actually have to go in there! Maybe we should get bunks or something."

"Have you ever slept in a bunk-bed? My brother Jason and I had them for a couple of months. That’s what the beds actually are that we’re getting, but you can take them apart and use them as two singles. Anyway, I never could sleep in the top bunk cause I always thought I would roll over and fall out. And when I was in the bottom, I don’t know how many times I cracked my head up against the top bunk trying to get up too fast." Alex paused for a second, and then got a real shit-eating grin on his face. "Besides, if we had bunks, I’d know every single time you decided to jack off and I’d never get any sleep with all the creaking and swaying motions you’d cause!"

Zach immediately turned bright red with embarrassment and for a second or two, Alex thought he might have gone too far. After a couple seconds of stammering. Zach started laughing. "You’d just join in and start beating your own meat and you know it you perv!" Alex busted out laughing, more because of Zach’s reaction and continuing blush than over the stupid joke.

"I just wouldn’t want you to feel lonely is all!"

"Sure, sure, sure. I’m soooo believing that!" Zach was still blushing as he headed towards the bathroom and started brushing his teeth. Alex was still laughing as he went into the bedroom to get their sleeping bags ready. Since they didn’t have furniture yet, they really didn’t have any choice but to camp out so to speak. As he was arranging the sleeping bags, Alex started getting nervous again. He was literally going to be sleeping within inches of Zach. The thought of his friend lying so close, sleeping right next to him was sending strange signals through his body. He couldn’t help wonder what Zach was going to wear to sleep in, or better yet, not wear. Alex still had never seen Zach undressed before. In the dorms, Zach had always slept in his boxers and T-shirt and he had always changed in the bathroom. He was just a really modest guy. But Alex couldn’t help wondering if maybe Zach would wear a little less tonight since it was just the two of them and it was pretty warm. The thought of Zach without a T-shirt on, or maybe even naked sent the blood rushing to his groin and within seconds Alex’s erection was very obvious. His reaction only further confused him, and he quickly stripped to his boxers and jumped into his own sleeping bag before Zach could see him in such an embarrassing state of arousal.

Zach finished up in the bathroom and walked into their bedroom. If he noticed anything unusual about Alex he sure didn’t show it. Yawning and obviously pretty sleepy, Zach pulled off his T-shirt and stripped off his shorts. Clad only in his boxers, he stood for a second or two as he set the alarm clock giving Alex ample time to admire all that superb flesh on display. Alex tried to keep his staring from being obvious since he didn’t want to get caught, but the sight of his friend’s nearly naked body was almost too much for him. He felt his dick give another twitch and he quickly rolled onto his side to keep from tenting the covers. Zach didn’t seem to notice and settled himself into his own sleeping bag mumbling "g’night" to his friend. Within only a few minutes, Zach’s breathing slowed and deepened into the steady rhythm of sleep. It took Alex quite a bit longer to calm his own confused mind and chase away all the disturbing fantasies he was having before he could drift off to sleep too.

***

To be continued.