Alex and Zach - 4. Chapter 4

Alex and Zach both looked at each other, smiling wryly. Then Alex sighed. "It’s going to be a long couple of days. I’m gonna go freaking nuts waiting. By the time we get to do anything, I’m gonna last maybe a whole two seconds!"

"Yeah, I know. Me too."

Alex pulled Zach back to rest against his chest and enfolded him in his arms. Zach was quiet for a few seconds, just happy and content to be held so closely. It was probably one of the happiest moments in his life. And yet there was a little doubt still nagging in his head.

Alex nuzzled Zach’s cheek and then started smiling mischievously. He nibbled playfully at one of Zach’s ears for a second or two, and then started to playfully tease in a loud, fake whisper. "Hey Zach! You know what? I got to see you naked! I got to see you n..a..k..e..d!"

Zach squirmed around but couldn’t quite get free from Alex’s embrace. He started laughing as Alex continued to taunt him and nibble at his ear. "You are such a perv!"

Alex smiled and blew lightly in Zach’s ear. "I may be a perv, but you love it. And I still got to see you naked!"

Zach relaxed back into Alex’s embrace, resting his head right up against Alex’s chest just listening to the thump thump of Alex’s heartbeat. Alex wrapped his arms around him, holding him close and resting his chin in the crook between Zach’s neck and shoulders even as he continued to nuzzle Zach’s cheek with his nose.

The moment seemed almost perfect and Zach hated to spoil it, but he had to talk with Alex seriously about something that had been bothering him since they had been so abruptly interrupted earlier. He wasn’t sure how to bring it up, but he knew he had to discuss the issue with Alex. "Maybe it’s a good thing your dad stopped us before we could go too much further. I’m not sure that would have been a good idea."

The seriousness in Zach’s voice communicated itself to Alex and he was immediately concerned. "Did I hurt you?" Alex released his embrace a little, scared he was still hurting his friend. A hint of panic was starting to creep into Alex’s voice. "Do I need to go get dad? Where does it hurt?"

"No Alex. You didn’t hurt me!" Zach wrapped his own arms around where Alex was hugging him in his own arms and pulled them back into their previous tight embrace. "What we were doing felt really good" Zach blushed a little at his own admission. "I mean I was a little sore, but it still felt really good."

"Are you sure?," Alex asked. "Dad said it would be really easy for me to hurt you. You have to tell me if I caused you any pain."

Zach could hear the concern and near panic in Alex’s voice. "I’m fine Alex," he answered. "Really. Yes, it was a little painful, but not really bad. What you were doing felt really fantastic!"

Alex relaxed a little, but not by much. "Did I go to fast? I should have gone slower. I should never had rushed you."

"It’s not that. Well, not really. It’s just, Alex, I, uh, I’ve never done anything like this before." Zach’s voice was hesitant and quiet. "I really don’t know what I’m suppose to do."

Alex hugged Zach a little closer. "I’ve never been with a guy before either Zach."

Zach’s voice was even more quiet if possible. "No Alex. You don’t understand. I mean I’ve never done ANYTHING before." Zach was a little shame faced as he admitted that and he turned a little so he could look Alex in the eyes. "Not with a guy, um, or a…a girl. I’ve never even kissed anyone before. Well, except Cindy, but that doesn’t count. She’s more of a sister than anything. Besides, that kiss was staged for Donna’s benefit." Zach was beginning to fidget a little.

Alex stared into Zach’s blue eyes, reading the hesitation and uncertainty there. He found himself touched to the core by the mute little appeal in those eyes. Again, he found himself just wanting to stare for hours into those sad blue eyes. Alex reached out and gently took Zach’s fidgeting hands into his own. "It’s ok. We can go as slow as you need to. I don’t really know what I’m doing either." Alex smiled tenderly at Zach, embracing him with his eyes. "We’ll just go slow and make it up as we go along."

Zach hung his head for a few seconds, then looking up, shyly, hesitantly he smiled a timid little half smile. "You’re not mad? That I…uh…that I don’t know what I’m doing? You’re not disappointed that…well, we need to go slow?"

Alex leaned over and kissed Zach’s cheek. "You’re worth the wait. I want you. God! I want you, but I can wait." Alex started smiling mischievously. "If worse comes to worse, I can always fall back on my hand for a little relief," Alex said even as he pantomimed a rapid up and down stroke with his clenched hand.

Zach chuckled at Alex’s antics and blushed a little at the innuendo. He leaned back into Alex’s chest and closed his eyes, sighing a little in contentment. Alex enfolded him again in his arms, just holding him and nuzzling his cheek for awhile.

A few minutes later, Dr. Edwards came back into the room, carrying a tray of food. "I hope you like my cooking," he said as he put the tray down next to them. "It’s nothing fancy, just some eggs, toast and juice."

Zach looked at the food and felt his stomach rumble a little in protest. "Oh, Dr. Edwards you shouldn’t have gone to the trouble. I’m not really hungry."

Dr. Edwards pretty much ignored his patient as he put plates into both Alex and Zach’s hands. "You have to eat Zach. You can’t heal unless you eat. When was the last time you ate something?"

Alex, already having started in on his own food, spoke up with his mouth half full. "It’s been a couple of days." Alex turned to face Zach and said "You didn’t haven’t anything yesterday but those beers and you didn’t eat anything at the restaurant the night before. You just played with your food."

Zach looked back at Alex, a little annoyance showing on his face. "I ate a little," he protested.

Dr. Edwards stepped in, stopping the argument before it could begin. "Well that was two days ago. Now try and eat a little Zach," he said even as he pushed the plate more firmly into Zach’s hand then turned and walked back out.

Zach gave up and accepted the plate and started picking a little at the food. He never was much of a breakfast eater and his stomach didn’t really feel up to the task of digestion right then. He took a few bites of the eggs to make everyone happy and was more than a little surprised when they stayed down. Alex, as usual, had finished his food in record time and now was just watching him eat. Zach started to blush a little under the scrutiny.

Zach finished a few more bites, blushing the whole time. "Do you want to finish this?" he asked Alex. "I really don’t think I can eat anymore. Not without having it come back up anyway."

Alex took the plate from Zach. "No, I’m full," he said even as he took a bite before placing it back on the tray his father had left. Zach laughed a little even as Alex turned back around, grinning with his mouth full and chewing happily.

Zach settled back a little more comfortably into the pillows and couldn’t help yawning. "Man, I’m tired. I feel like I could fall asleep right now."

Alex reached over and tenderly brushed Zach’s ever present hair out of his eyes. "You can go back to sleep if you want. You must be dead tired. I’ll just sit here and gawk at you for awhile!" Alex grinned and settled back into the pillows himself, turning on his side so he could continue to watch Zach even as he started gently rubbing his chest in little circles.

As much as he wanted to stay awake, Zach couldn’t help closing his eyes and drifting off to sleep, smiling a happy little smile even as he drifted off.

***

Jason was walking back towards his room when he passed his little brother’s door. Glancing in, he saw his brother was just lying there, staring at Zach as if enthralled. Jason stopped and watched Alex for a few seconds, smiling at the intimate little scene before him. He was so happy that Alex had finally admitted that he was gay instead of trying to hide it and just making himself miserable in the process. And Jason was even happier that he found someone to care about. That Zach cared just as much for Alex was obvious to anyone with eyes.

Alex felt someone watching him and looked up towards the door, seeing his brother smiling at him. Alex smiled at his brother and motioned him to come in. "Hey, what’s up?"

Jason stepped into the room and sat at his brother’s desk chair. "So did you and Zach have a good talk?" Jason laughed a little even as he continued, "You must have said something right considering the position dad and I found you two in this morning."

Alex grinned back at his brother, a light blush coloring his cheeks. "Yeah, well, Zach may never be able to look you in the eye again without turning red, but we finally told each other how we felt."

The expression on Jason’s face became even more amused if possible. "How much did dad see? I mean were you guys…uh…well…"

Alex’s expression turned a little sheepish, but he continued grinning. "No you perv! It was just some heavy petting and making out." Alex ducked his head for a second as he started to blush, but quickly looked back up still smiling. "Some VERY heavy petting. I think Zach was pretty close, I know I was!"

Jason started laughing as he drew back in mock disgust. "EEEWWWW! I didn’t need to know that!"

Alex threw his pillow at Jason and continued to laugh. "Well, you asked!"

Jason threw the pillow back at him even as he stood up. "Yeah, and now I’m sorry!" Jason stepped over to the bed and tossled his brother’s hair for a second, something he knew his brother liked even though he pretended it annoyed him. Then he turned towards the door, starting to leave. "I’m really happy for you Alex. I’m glad you found someone you really care for."

Alex gave his brother a huge smile, bigger than Jason had seen on Alex’s face in a long time. "Thanks Jason. Thanks for everything."

As he walked out the door to continue to his room, Jason turned his head and gave his brother a parting smile.

***

It was a couple of hours later when Dr. Edwards poked his head back into Alex’s room to check on them. Zach looked to be sound asleep, which was really no surprise. And even Alex seemed to have drifted off into a light doze, his hand lightly resting on Zach’s chest. Dr. Edwards smiled a little and turned to go. He was reluctant to disturb such a quiet, happy little scene. As he was leaving, he made a very slight noise waking Alex. "I’m sorry son. I didn’t mean to wake you. Go ahead and go back to sleep."

Alex yawned a little even as he sat up a little. "It’s ok Dad. I didn’t realize I had fallen asleep. What’s up?"

Dr. Edwards stepped halfway back into the room. "Nothing serious. I just thought I’d check on you two. I also thought Zachary might want to call his parents."

Alex’s face immediately assumed a slightly angry expression at that suggestion. "Yeah, he probably should. But those assholes were partly to blame for all this!" Alex’s voice had gotten a little louder in his anger.

Dr. Edwards started to reply when Zach tossed his head a little, coming sleepily awake at the noise. Zach rubbed his eyes a little trying to clear the sleep from them. Yawning he said "Hey. Gee, I can’t believe I fell asleep again."

Dr. Edwards smiled a little at him as he walked over and sat on the edge of the bed. "I’m more surprised you keep waking up. Don’t you know you’re suppose to be resting right now? How are you feeling?"

Zach couldn’t help yawning again, blushing a little even as he tried to hide the yawn from both Alex and his dad. "I guess I’m ok. Just really tired."

Dr. Edwards continued smiling warmly at Zach. "Well part of that is the pain medicine and part is your body trying to heal. Don’t worry about falling asleep. Speaking of medicine, you probably should take a pill now." Dr. Edwards fumbled at his pockets for a second and then pulled out a bottle and shook one of the pills into his hand and offered it to Zach.

Zach looked at the pill a little unhappily, not taking it yet. "Do I have too? I really don’t feel too bad and I don’t like the way my mind was all fogged up with those."

"These aren’t nearly as strong as what you were on last night," Dr. Edwards answered. "I really think you should take them. Your leg would probably be in a lot more pain if you didn’t take it. Not to mention the pain from the bruising and cuts to your groin."

Zach’s eyes went a little big as he blanched a little at that thought. "I’ll take it!" he said even as he reached almost desperately for the offered pill. He did not want to feel that particular sensation again!

Alex and his dad both grinned knowingly at Zach as he hastily swallowed the pill washing it down with a little left over juice from breakfast. Zach’s expression was a little sheepish as he looked back at both of them. Both Alex and his dad knew better than to say anything though, but they couldn’t help the grins on their faces.

Dr. Edwards cleared his voice to help change the subject. "Now that that is done, I thought you might want to call your parents Zachary. Let them know what has happened. I doubt if they have heard anything, but you don’t want them to worry if they do."

Zach’s eyes immediately clouded over and all traces of any happiness totally fled. He hung his head for a few seconds, just staring without making any kind of reply. Then he looked back up with the saddest most lost expression across his face. In a quiet, quavering voice, "I guess I should," was his only reply.

Dr. Edwards looked thoughtful for a second or two. "Do you want me to call them for you? I can tell them what happened and that you are sleeping if you want."

For a second Zach’s eyes looked hopeful, but then clouded over again as he shook his head no. "No, I should call them myself. Thank you for offering."

Dr. Edwards could tell something was wrong and hesitated for a second or two before handing the phone to Zach wordlessly. He got up to leave, but paused and lightly squeezed Zach’s shoulder in silent support. Looking troubled, he left the two alone once again.

Zach stared at the phone in his hands for a few minutes, making no attempt to dial, looking more unhappy than Alex had ever seen him. "Are you sure you want to do this? I can call dad back in here ya know."

Zach looked Alex in the eye and sighed. "No. I guess I have to do this myself." Almost fearfully, he dialed the number and waited for an answer, looking almost like he was ready to hang up at the first possible chance. After a few seconds, Alex could hear, faintly, someone on the other end pick up.

"Hello."

Zach’s face blanched a little. "Hi mom. It’s Zach."

"Oh hi Zach. We weren’t expecting you to call. Your father and I have been furiously trying to get everything in the car for the trip to your brother’s. Cant this wait?"

"I’m sorry mom. I just wanted to call and let you and dad know I’ve been in a car accident." Zach looked like he was about to cry, but his voice remained totally steady.

"An Accident! What kind of accident? Oh Zach, what a time for you to get hurt!"

Zach flinched a little, but continued without letting anything show in his voice. "I’m not hurt that bad. I did break my leg, but it’s not that bad. I just wanted to let you and dad know before someone else told you. I didn’t want you to worry."

"Oh Zach! You broke your leg? This is really going to disappoint your father. We were really looking forward to this trip. We haven’t seen your brother in such a long time."

Tears were beginning to roll down from Zach’s eyes and he had started to tremble slightly, and yet Alex was amazed that his voice was still rock steady. None of the anguish he was feeling was even hinted at in his voice. "You don’t have to cancel the trip. You guys can still go. I’m not hurt that bad. I just thought I should tell you."

"Well that’s a relief. I know your father would be crushed if we had to cancel now. Thanks for calling honey, but I really should go. There’s still a million things to do yet."

Zach was close to silently sobbing now, but still he kept his voice cheery. "Bye mom. I love you."

"Bye honey. We’ll talk to you later."

Zach hung up the phone, staring at it even as he continued to silently cry, his body shaking. "She didn’t even…she didn’t…even wish…wish me a Merry Christmas."

Alex reached over to comfort Zach, to hug him, to embrace him and never let him go, but Zach flinched violently away not yet ready for any kind of contact. He continued to sob for several minutes even as he tried to pull the hurt back into himself, to use it as a shield. He squeezed his eyes shut trying to keep the rest of the world at bay, to never let anything in again, to take comfort in that quiet darkness.

Alex was so angry he wanted to smash his hand against the wall. He could not understand how anyone could treat anyone with such coldness. It was made even worse since it wasn’t a stranger these people were treating this way, but their own son. How could they not see what they were doing to Zach? Alex struggled to get his anger under control. It wouldn’t do to let Zach know how pissed he was at his parents. Zach was hurting enough as it was.

Alex let Zach cry for a few more minutes before he tentatively reached over and rubbed his shoulders. Zach flinched again, but not nearly as violently and Alex continued to rub his shoulders in as comforting a way as he could. Slowly, Zach’s sobbing quieted, but his body continued to tremble.

Finally, Zach reopened his eyes. The look on his face was so hurt, so anguished, so lost that it was almost a physical slap to Alex. Alex could feel the internal temperature on his anger beginning to build up again and he struggled to keep them in check. He smiled tenderly at Zach, trying to offer what comfort he could.

Zach was quiet for a few more seconds, still shaking. When he finally spoke, his voice was raspy and barely audible. "Do you think you or your dad could drive me back to the apartment?"

Alex looked at Zach, confusion across his face. "The apartment? Why do you want to go there?"

Zach closed his eyes again, but still he answered. "I don’t want to go back to my house. Not for Christmas. I’ll just stay at the apartment."

Alex was stunned and stared at Zach for a few seconds before answering. "You’re not going back to the apartment. You are staying here with us." Alex’s voice had a little edge to it.

Zach opened his eyes again, looking at Alex a little surprised at the annoyance in his voice. "It’s ok. I’ll be ok by myself. I can’t stay here – I’d be in the way. It’s Christmas and you don’t need anyone intruding on that."

Alex was getting really annoyed now. Why couldn’t Zach just accept that he was wanted? "Dad!" Alex shouted. "Can you come here?"

Dr. Edwards walked back into the room almost instantly, a concerned look on his face. "What is it? Are you starting to hurt somewhere Zachary?" Jason was right behind his father, a worried look on his face too.

Alex looked at his father, realizing he had scared him by shouting. "No, it’s not that dad. Zach says he wants to go back to the apartment even though I keep telling him he can stay here. He thinks he’s going to be intruding on our Christmas. Make him stay!" Even as he was explaining to his dad, he was absently brushing the hair out of Zach’s eyes again.

Dr. Edwards and Jason both relaxed somewhat. Dr. Edwards walked over and sat on the edge of the bed next to Zach even as Jason took up occupation in the doorway. "Zachary, you are certainly welcome to stay here," Dr. Edwards said. "I didn’t think there was any question about that. I had just assumed you’d be staying with us." Jason nodded his agreement.

Zach’s eyes started to water again. "I…I don’t know. I don’t want to be a bother."

Dr. Edwards reached over and squeezed Zach’s shoulder in support. "You’re not a bother." Seeing that Zach was unconvinced, Dr. Edwards decided to try a different tactic. "Ok. If you won’t stay because we asked you to, then as your doctor, I’m ordering you to stay!" Dr. Edwards smiled encouragingly. "Don’t make me get out the restraints!"

Jason decided to chime in at that point, his voice taking on a false pleading tone. He dropped to his kneese, clenching his hands together and crawled over to the edge of the bed. "Please, Please, Please Zach! Stay with us! Please! If you don’t stay, Alex will pout like you wouldn’t believe. He’s such a baby! Please Stay! Don’t ruin my Christmas by making me endure my little brother’s pouting!"

Alex threw a pillow at Jason, laughing at his brother’s antics. Jason took the pillow full in the face, falling over laughing. Even Zach was laughing a little in spite of himself. Jason could be such a goof ball. He knew why Alex loved his brother so much.

Finally, giving up in the face of such overwhelming odds, Zach nodded his head. With a weak little grin spreading to his face he said, "All right. If you’re really sure I won’t be in the way, I’ll stay. I guess. I couldn’t bear to ruin Jason’s Christmas."

Jason struggled back up to his knees. "Oh thank you, thank you, thank you! You’ve saved Christmas! You’re my hero."

Dr. Edwards was shaking his head in mock disgust, but was still laughing. Grabbing Jason by the ear he started towards the door. "Come on you clown. You can worship your hero from afar." Jason was back peddling for all he was worth, squeaking in protest as his father continued to drag him out of the room.

Zach was grinning now, his eyes still a little wet. "Thanks Dr. Edwards. For letting me stay."

Dr. Edwards smiled back at his patient. "It’s no problem Zachary. You’re more than welcome." He left the room, Jason still in tow protesting the entire way.

Alex settled back down next to Zach, resting his hand on his chest, drawing lazy little circles through the light hair fanning across his chest. He continued to stare into Zach’s blue eyes, wondering if it was possible to drown in them. He still wasn’t sure how a guy could have such gorgeous eyes.

Zach endured the stare for a few minutes, then started blushing, color spreading from his face to his ears and then started down his neck and chest. "What?"

Alex smiled at him. "Nothing. I just like looking at you. I could stare for hours into your eyes." Then his smile became positively dangerous. "The rest of you ain’t too bad either. Specially the covered parts!"

Zach’s blush deepened to a bright crimson and he positively squirmed. Alex chuckled at his reaction and leaned over kissing him on the lips, nibbling a little at Zach’s lower lip before pulling back up. Zach had closed his eyes again, in pleasure and contentment this time though. He snuggled up into Alex’s chest, pressing his entire body into him and sighed happily. Alex continued to hold him, nuzzling him even long after Zach had fallen back asleep.

***

To Be Continued.