The Strange Life of Jonas Marks - 4. Chapter 4

By the time I got back to Jenny’s, she and her family had already eaten dinner. The boys had cooked macaroni and cheese with hot dogs, but Jenny managed to save me some.

“So, did you have any luck finding a job?” Jenny asked as I placed my plate into the microwave.

I looked at her and sighed. “What do you think?”

“Aww, sorry Jo.” She walked over and rubbed my arm. “You’ll do better tomorrow.”

“No, doofus,” I said breaking into a smile, “I got a job, but you just won’t believe where!” Hell, I still couldn’t believe it.

Jenny’s eyebrow rose as she looked at me, then she leaned against the counter crossing her arms. I could see her mind go to work. She loved guessing games, but I knew she’d never guess this one.

“Oh, please tell me you’re not the janitor at the strip club!” The horror in her eyes faded quickly. “No. You aren’t old enough to work there. Hmm. You got a job pumping gas? Maybe working at Kelly’s?”

I shook my head, laughing at the wild suggestions. “Not even close, Jens.”

“That’s all I got, Jo-boy,” she said as her eyes narrowed. “So come on, tell me already.”

Mrs. Meyer came as Jenny finished speaking.

“Tell you what? Did you find a boyfriend, Jonas?” She cocked an eye brow and looked at me.

“Oh God, no.” I don’t know why I sounded so horrified by the suggestion. I mean I did want a boyfriend. “I got a job.”

“Yeah, but he won’t tell me where.” Jenny glared at me, as if it was my fault she didn’t know yet.

“I was going to, but she decided she wanted to guess. Not that she’s even come close.” I tried my best not gloat, but I couldn’t stop the smile.

“Alright, so don’t tell Jenny, just tell me,” Mrs. Meyer winked at me as she poured her coffee. “I hope you didn’t rush to take a job that you’ll end up hating.”

“I don’t think I’ll hate working at Kroger’s.” I smiled widely at how surprised they looked.

“You’re kidding!” Jenny walked over and hugged me. “Oh my God, Kroger’s!”

“Wow. I never would have thought about applying there.” The way Mrs. Meyer looked at me, like she was proud, made me feel even better. “How did you hear about a job there?”

“Actually I had stopped at Kelly’s for lunch. I was really depressed. I mean I was applying everywhere. You know that place that is always advertising for a dog walker. Hell, I’d even applied for that and you know dogs make me nervous but I’m desperate for work.”

“Jonas, relax. You know I’m not going to let you go live on the streets.” Mrs. Meyer’s eyes narrowed and she shook her head. “Sometimes I swear your father needs his head handed to him!”

“Yeah, well,” I said awkwardly. I knew Dad had never gotten along with any of my friends’ parents, but he really hated Mrs. Meyer. I ducked my head down as I took my food out of the microwave.

“So you went to Kelly’s.” That was typical Jenny, focusing on what SHE wanted to know. “How did that get you a job at Kroger’s?”

“Someone left the help wanted section behind that listed Kroger’s as needing help. I applied and got the job.”

“Good for you.” Mrs. Meyer ruffled my hair and headed back into the family room with her coffee.

“So what are you? The janitor? Working in the lunchroom? Come on tell me!”

I tried not to roll my eyes. “Believe it or not, I’m a secretary or personal assistant to Mr. Openseter.”

“Openseter? I don’t recognize the name. Is he from around here?”

I laughed and tried to imagine my boss growing up in a neighborhood like this.

“No. He is … um … different. Sort of hard to explain.”

“Cool. So what are you getting paid?”

That was Jenny, get right to the bottom line. She walked over to the fridge and grabbed a can of soda.

“Twenty-one dollars an hour.” I could barely keep my voice down. “Can you believe it?”

She almost spit the soda out and part if it did come out her nose. I tried to ignore it, but I still laughed.

“You bastard.” Jenny was pissed as she grabbed a napkin and wiped off her face. “You waited till I had a mouth full of soda before you told me that joke.”

I stopped laughing and shook my head as I looked at Jenny. “It’s no joke. I’m going to be paid twenty one bucks an hour.”

“Christ!” She looked sort of pissed off and happy all at once. “You’re gonna be rich. What are they going to make you do for all the money?”

Jenny and I moved down to her bedroom where she drilled me on every detail of the interview while I tried to eat. I swear she kept waiting for me to alter my story, but when all you have is the truth, no matter how strange it is, there isn’t anything to change.

“Wow. I don’t know whether to be jealous or scared for you.” Jenny leaned back on the bed and stared at me, shaking her head. “Your boss sounds … really odd.”

“Well he is a bit odd, but he’s nice.” I couldn’t help but tease her as I told her the final bit of news. “Plus I get my own office.”

Jenny stared at me for a moment and I thought I’d ticked her off again.

“You realize you’re going to have to go shopping tomorrow.” Jenny’s eyes lit up.

Strange how my reaction was different from hers, I mean I hated it. “Shopping?”

“Come on, Jonas, get with it.” Jenny sat up and she rolled her eyes as she looked me over. “You told me how everyone there dresses, that’s how you need to dress. For that, you need to go shopping for clothes. Tee shirts and jeans aren’t going to cut it there. That woman in personnel already warned you about wearing shoes, not sneakers.”

I blushed as thought of Ms. White’s comment. I wanted to remind her that it had been a mistake, but Jenny was right. I did need a new wardrobe. It was a good thing I had some money saved, or I would end up embarrassing myself.

“Take me to work tomorrow. You can hit the suit place there. You’re going to need one from the sounds of it.” Jenny was getting excited as she ticked off what I should get on her fingers. “Get some dress shirts and ties too. Oh, I wish I had time to go with you, I bet I could make you look really hot in a suit.”

“Would you stop?” I loved her and all, but this was too much. “God, you make me sound like a slob or a dress up doll for you to play with.”

“Jo, I love you, but you have no sense of style. Hell, face it, the only man you’re ever going to find dressing like you do, is one that works at Burger King.”

“Thanks so much!” I glared at her, hoping she might get the hint.

“Babe, I know you haven’t dated yet, but it doesn’t mean you can’t dress up to attract one.”

Sometimes Mrs. Meyer’s timing was perfect. She knocked then opened the door without waiting for an answer.

“Hey, we’re going to watch a movie and have ice cream. Stop being anti-social and join the rest of the family.”

Obediently, we got up and made our way to the family room. The twins put in a comedy that made me smile, but Jenny scowled. Mrs. Meyer brought us all ice cream. When it was over, Mrs. Meyer chased everyone to bed and cleaned up.

Early the next morning, I did as I was told and dropped Jenny off at work before going to look at clothes. The dress shirt from Wal-mart cost me fourteen dollars, but the cheapest shirt here at Suits for Men was forty three bucks. There was this really lean guy who took my measurements for a suit and dress pants. I swear he was feeling me up, pretending to checking on my pants size.

An hour later, I had a suit, a pair of dress pants, one shirt, and fifty dollars left to my name. I never realized what it cost to have a good job until that moment.

I stopped by Jenny’s job on the way out, figuring she’d be happy with my purchases. Boy, was I wrong. Sometimes I wondered if I was ever going to be right again.

“There’s no way in hell you’re wearing a black dress shirt with a black suit.” She was pissed, watching her eyes narrow as she looked at my purchases. “You’ll look like you belong in a coffin. Take it back. Now!”

“But …”

“No buts!” She pointed to the exit and stared at me. “Get that awful thing back to the store. Hold on, let me look at that.”

She took the offending shirt and began to examine it. She laid the shirt against my suit, shook her head, and scowled at me. “Okay now I know your size. Return it, then come back here and give me the money.”

“Well at least you like the suit and pants.” I just didn’t know when to shut my big mouth.

“Wait!” Jenny grabbed my arm as I tried to leave. “Take the pants back, too.”

“Jenny.” I couldn’t believe she didn’t like what I bought. “You told me to get dress clothes.”

“Yeah, clothes to make you look good and fit in.” She rolled her eyes at me. “Sometimes I forget who I’m talking to. I thought all gay men had fashion sense.” She tried to hide her smile.

“I guess I didn’t get the memo,” I said sarcastically.

“Guess not,” sighed Jenny. “I know what you need now and I promise to make you look good. Go get that crap back and meet me here in a half hour. I’ll take you shopping on my lunch break.”

Embarrassed I walked back to the suit store. The guy who had helped me raised an eyebrow as I walked in, so I explained that my girlfriend hated the shirt and pants. I hoped to discourage him, so I didn’t explain she was a friend who was a girl.

I wandered the mall until it was time for Jenny’s break. She practically dragged me to Dress Successfully. It had just opened, but she seemed to already know the guy working there. He was tall and had long black hair tied back in a pony tail. His red dress shirt and blood red pants somehow matched without being the same color.

“Ted, come over here.” Jenny was excited as she waved getting his attention. “I have an emergency case for you.”

“Sounds intriguing, Jen.” Ted came over and leaned against the counter.

“Jonas has a little over a hundred dollars and he needs to be redone for a job at Kroger’s.”

“Expensive store.” He paused and looked me over carefully. “What are you looking for? Business? Fun? Something that can go from one to the other?”

“I want him to look good.” Jenny smiled, there was no denying how much she was enjoying this. “Stay away from black, he gets enough of that.”

“Show off his eyes?” Ted looked deeply into my face. The man was definitely flirting with me.

“Um, guys. Hi. Remember me? The guy you are talking about,” I said feeling uncomfortable

“Ignore him, Ted.” She rolled her eyes and kept right on going. “Yeah, his eyes are pretty. He also has that tight hot bod from wrestling. Show it off, but make it tasteful.”

“Trust me, no problem.” Ted flashed me a smile, and I felt myself begin to blush under his attention. “Right now we have some nice discount stuff that just came in. Does he need any ties?”

“Grab him at least one.” Jenny paused and looked me over again. “Oh, and he needs a pair of dress pants that show off his ass.”

I could feel my cheeks burning and barely heard Ted’s answer

“Got it. Give me a few minutes and I’ll have just what he needs.”

Ted vanished into the racks. He seemed to know what I needed just by looking me over. He never even asked my sizes.

“You know you could have asked me what I wanted,” I said rounding on Jenny.

“I could, but then you would be dressed boring.” Jenny smiled and hugged me tight. “You could do with some sexy clothes. They’ll be tasteful, but you’ll look good. Trust me, Ted knows what he is doing.”

“How would you know?” I couldn’t figure out how she would know about the owner of a men’s dress store.

“Because, Jo, I look at how he dresses himself. That man knows how to dress for success.” She waved her hand around the room. “His store is going to be a knock out.”

I would have argued with her, but Jenny was right. I was most comfortable in jeans and a tee shirt which is all I had to worry about when I worked at Bobby’s. I stood looking at belts while Jenny sat on the edge of the counter waiting. Ted appeared a few minutes later with eight shirts, two ties, and a pair of dress pants. Jenny made me try on everything. I hate to admit it to her, but the clothing not only fit, it looked damn good on me.

“Better.” Jenny smiled happily. “Now you’re ready for work. Thanks Ted. You really are a prince.”

“No problem. He needed the help,” Ted said smiling at me.

I was anxious to find out what this was going to cost me. Jenny seemed to forget just how much I had to spend. As Ted rang things up, Jenny pulled out a coupon that discounted everything, flashing me a smile to let me know she remembered how much cash I had. For ten dollars more than I had spent on a shirt and pants at the other place, I got the arm load of stuff Ted had picked out for me. Not only did I get more for less, but it looked a hell of a lot better too.

Now I was ready for Orientation. At least I wouldn’t be worried about what I wore to work.