The Flight of freedom - 1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

Life is never easy, no matter who you are or where you come from. I’m not going to lie, people with money and power may have some sort of easy life but for every living thing on earth life is hard. And for me at this moment, life is so hard that I'm wondering if I'm going batshit crazy. My name is Emmett Avery Cormick. I currently live with my slightly weird mum who, bless her heart, has raised me all by herself; she had no choice, my dad died when I was young. I don’t remember much about him, but I know he was called Ferran Cormick.

It was this moment in time when my mum’s voice broke through my bubble of thought.

“Emmett Avery! I want you outta bed in the next five minutes or you will be late for college, AGAIN!”

“It’s the first day back, Mother! People aren’t going to miss me.” I rolled my eyes. Every day at my college was the same; you go, nobody speaks to you, lessons start, and nobody looks at you, although they do speak about you.

They think I can’t hear them, but I can and I have been able to for years; every time they’ve whispered about my looks I’ve heard them. I've heard them say everything they hate about me. It hurt at first. I even went to great lengths trying to befriend some people so I wasn’t a complete loner. Not even the teachers had any time for me. I'm not bothered about it all though; I have the library, which is full of amazing books, and I also have the gym and pool at school. And it’s because of all my alone time that I have good grades and a decently muscled body to go with it.

Looking at myself in my full-length mirror I can see that puberty has been kind to me. Genetics has also been kind to me; my parents were active and healthy which helps. My mum, Rachel Cormick, was twenty-four years old when she had me. Apparently it was quite traumatic for her; I was in a hurry, as she would say. Looking back towards my bed I see that it’s only 7:30 in the morning; I have time to fix my short brown hair and choose what I’m going to wear for the day. I know I said that I don’t care what people think about me, but I like to feel comfortable with myself and what I wear. Teenagers nowadays use clothing and looks to “categorize” fellow students into a “social hierarchy”. I rolled my eyes and tutted quietly.

I ended up choosing a light-grey hoodie that was kinda baggy, a green t-shirt that had a tree shadowed on the front, some black jeans that shaped my legs perfectly and some black trainers that were starting to let the water in at the back. This didn’t bother in the least, it meant that they were well-worn yet comfortable, so what if my left foot would get a little wet if I stood in a puddle? This is my usual ensemble when it comes to clothing,

I just want someone to like me for me. I know I'm weird, sometimes I even disgust myself because I know deep down I'm a freak. I have better hearing than most people I know, I can also see things in so much more detail as well. Sighing and looking back towards the mirror, I see the small scar that sits atop my left eyebrow, it’s as if someone had tried to cut my eyebrow off but went too high. I notice my eyes while I tried to think back to my early childhood years. I believe my eyes are a nice shade of green; my mum always says they are like bright emeralds that she can never buy. I get my eye colour from my mum, yet hers are darker green, an earthy green.

Liking what I see, I decide to take my 5’9” frame downstairs to the kitchen. My mum was sitting at the table eating a small bowl of Corn Flakes. I wrinkle my nose at the smell; it’s like wet cardboard that has nasty extras and I've been refusing to eat it for years. Sitting across from my mum, I look at her face and admire her beauty; she has long blonde hair that has started to let some grey through. Since I was little, her hair hasn’t been cared for properly, it’s as if she just brushes it and says that it will do. She has it cut twice a year, never dyes it to another colour or anything. Her green eyes are sad; I think she’s still mourning my father. She has tried dating over the years, but she has never been able to keep a hold on a relationship.

When I was eight I found some pictures under her bed that were taken not long after I was born. You could see my father standing behind my mum while she was holding me; they were looking down at me and smiling. Everything in the picture looked perfect and happy. My mum caught me holding it and burst into tears, she shouted at me, telling me that I shouldn’t have looked, that only naughty children went through their parents’ possessions and made them cry. I left her there, in her room, sobbing into a picture of my father. And since that day ten years ago, I have never mentioned it or my father to her. It’s obvious to anyone that she misses him. It’s like her heart and soul died when he did.

“Mumma, you look good today.” I started calling her Mumma years ago; it was like I really wanted her to listen when I called her that. I needed her to understand that I loved her, and that I was here for her, I would always be here for her.

“Awww sweetheart, thank you.” She smiled at me, her face looking younger at that small gesture.

“Are you ready for the first day back at college?”

I sighed. I hated going but I could see why I needed to.

“You know I'm ready, I'm just unwilling to go.” My wonderfully weird mum smiled at me, she thought I was being funny!

“Do it for Mumma, you know you want to.” She winked at me and her smile got larger and brighter. Slowly but surely I could feel the corners of my mouth start to pull up into a smile also.

“All right! All right! All right! I will do it for you Mumma!” I shake with laughter. If only she could always be this playful. After our brief conversation I get up and quickly pour some kids’ cereal; I like eating them dry. I pour myself some coffee and sit back down. As I sit there thinking, I let my mind wonder about how today was actually going to go. I wonder if there are going to be any new kids that would be starting. New kids are cool; I was always so, so close to making a new friend until one of the other more popular guys comes over and tells them that I'm a freak saying things like, “Dude, I wouldn’t be sitting there if I were you. Emmett is a total weirdo that will stalk you and listen to your convos.” Stupid stuff like this makes college life so much harder.

After breakfast I clean up and go to sort myself out and grab what I needed for college. It was time now to go to the one place that I consider to be hell. On the drive to college my mum turns the radio up; listening to the radio is her way of saying that she doesn’t feel like talking. I sigh inwardly when things like this happen, I don’t communicate with people as it is, but I still want some sort of socialisation with human beings.

The drive there is beautiful; the trees are green and thriving with life. With my freak hearing I could tell that birds were feeding their young, it was calming. I liked birds. Birds to me have a freedom that I have always coveted, they fly, they thrive, and they live without many limits, the sky really is the limit for them.

Once we arrive, I quickly lean over and give my mum a quick hug. The weather is forecasted to be nice so I will be walking home. Walking home gives me time to think, or some space to daydream about a life I could never have. As I watch my mum drive away from school, I can feel eyes on the back of my head. This is exactly the same as any other day of the year.

Walking through the college’s quiet corridors, I quickly make my way to the library; this is one of the places where I could be alone. I can lose myself in amazing stories that capture my heart; these stories make me laugh, cry, and feel love. Being a gay 18-year-old boy with no friends makes it hard to do anything, that’s why I come here, to feel the love that imaginary people have had for others. After quickly speaking with the head librarian about new books, I leave the library and walk towards my tutor’s room that sits next to the library.

After signing in at the front desk, I make my way towards the back of the room; no one bothers me in the back. No one can throw things at the back of my head. This is a lesson I learnt early in my educational years. Around me people are starting to take their places, they’re excited about something, so being curious, I decide to listen in.

“Have you seen the new guys that are starting?”

“No, but I have heard that the twins are adopted brothers, that’s what I heard from Emily’s mum, anyway-“

Everyone shushed as our teacher Mr Harroden came in; he’s an ex-army guy and people respect him. He’s fought for our country; he has probably seen things that have scarred his mind beyond anything that we could ever imagine. I like Mr H; he always admires my work ethic. I just do my work so I don’t have to listen to the vile things that people whisper about others. Teenagers are cruel; the things they can say to others can be the difference between life and death and it’s quite disgusting.

The morning lessons end without much trouble, and people are really excited about meeting the new guys. Me, well, I'm not too bothered either way, they might talk to me but eventually they will turn their backs and forget me, or they will become a new set of bullies that find delight in tormenting and beating me. When lunch finally rolls around I leave to go to my locker, only to find someone blocking it: John Peterson. I've known John since we were thirteen, and he has been bullying me since then. I tried to escape his wrath by coming to college once school had finished, but apparently fate has other things in mind.

I figure that clearing my throat would notify him to my presence, but apparently today is a beating day. Whatever just grab your stuff and head to the library. Easy, breathe Emmett, breathe.

“Excuse me, you’re in front of my locker.” See, I thought, calm and civil, there shouldn’t be any problem. Of course that is wishful thinking. John turns to me, smiling like I’m some sort of rodent trapped in the corner of a room.

He smiles at me. “Emmett, Emmett, Emmett. I was beginning to think that you wouldn’t show.”

Looking at his face, I can see why people like him, even fancy him. He has blond hair, most of which is cut shorter than my own, except for the front, which is spiked up using gel that smells a lot like tar. Flexing his muscles as he stands up to his full 6-foot height, I am suddenly expecting a blow to the face, when I hear a group of people laughing as they come towards us. They’re most likely to join in so I drop my head low to my chest and wait for the blow that’s going to be delivered. But the blow never comes; John is standing facing the new guys, laughing. I slowly raise my head, seeing that John is blocking my view of most of the guys, I quickly open my locker and grab what I need for the rest of the day’s lessons. As I try to shut my locker I notice one of the new guys go to shake John’s hand.

“Hi, my name’s Michael. The twin is called Brian, and this guy is our brother, Jayden.” This Michael guy has a rough voice yet he almost seems to purr when he speaks. I see John shake the new guy’s hand. I spotted that as he shakes their hands he tries to tighten his grip and show that he is “the alpha”. I chuckle to myself at the thought of him trying to be top dog, from what I can see of Michael, he’s muscled and he’s probably a bit taller than John also, so… Mirror Michael and you have his twin Brian. But what about Jayden? All I could see is a cap that’s shading his eyes.

My thoughts are interrupted as John turns back around and glares at me.

“What the fuck are you laughing at, freak?” I blush and shake my head. I don’t want to get beaten up in front of the new guys.

“Nothing, I'm laughing at nothing.” I start to back away and turn towards the library. I see Michael, our eyes meet, and he... he flinched? I quickly turn and make my way towards the library. I need to relax and lose myself in a world that isn’t my own.

When I get to the library, I nod to the librarian that’s at the main desk. The people that work here understand me; they have a love for books and so do I. They never bother me and I’m allowed to read anything I want and sit wherever I want. So I walk towards my usual spot. To me it’s beautiful, it’s a window seat, and it has the glow from the sun that makes, it was warm, and it lets off a vibe of privacy. As I sit down I look out onto the courtyard that most of students spend their breaks in. I notice John and the new boys sitting on a bench, the twins are eating from a paper bag that they hold between them. Jayden was just sitting there, his cap drawn down over his face. Yet i could see all of the small scars that covered his beautiful strong hands. This is so frustrating! To see a body but no face is like seeing the title on a book but there are no words inside.

I take a deep breath and decide to just lose myself in a book but after a few chapters have been read I settle on looking out into the courtyard and I notice the time that’s on the clock tower. Five minutes left of lunch. Five more minutes of freedom. Not long until the day is over. I look down to see how many people are still out in the sun and I catch John’s eye, I can see him sitting with most of the jocks and the new guys. I can see him saying something but I can’t quite make out what. I think he said Freak. Whatever he said catches the attention of the guys sitting with him. One by one I see them all look up, and the jocks that I've known for years start laughing. Michael nudges Brian, they look up and I start to back away from the window. They give off a vibe I don’t understand. They turn to Jayden and I see Michael mouth look. And for some reason, I jump back into the shadows of the bookcase and shut my eyes, silently praying that Jayden won’t see me.

Walking quickly out of the library so I don’t meet anyone on the way to class, I think about what I did in the library. Why did the twins make me feel they way they did? There is something there that I just can’t put my finger on. Shrugging, I continue walking to class. I walk into the classroom, sit in my seat and let the lesson take over my mind. I don’t even give myself a chance to think about anything else but what we are supposed to be learning about at that moment. The bell for the end of the day is my saviour and it rings loud and clear. Now I can go home and retreat to my room where nothing can get to me. I can forget what has happened at school; I can forget the feeling of weirdness that the Pine twins give off. I learnt their last name when I listened to a group of young girls as I was walking to one of my classes.

After I put my books back into my locker I start to walk towards the main entrance. I’m thinking about which way home I should take when a classroom door to my right opens and a 6-foot tall Brian walks into me, knocking me to the floor.

“Hey little guy, you okay?” I feel a strong hand reach down and wrap around my arm. Nothing is broken, so I nod. I look up to see Brian smiling down at me. I shrug his arm off, and start to back away out of arms reach. Forgetting my manners I look up; I have to thank him for not just leaving me there like a fool.

“T- Thanks.“ Jayden is behind him, looking at me with such a weird expression on his handsome face. It’s not hostile but it’s weirding me out, not like I’m going to scream and run for the hills but enough to make me wary of him. Michael stepped out from behind Jayden and starts to whisper.

“He doesn’t know, Jayden. Now isn’t the time for this.“ Jayden, however, has other ideas and he starts to move towards me and Michael quickly grabs his arm while Brian turned and grabbed the other. So I just turn around and leave, I don’t say anything else to them. I walk down the corridor, not looking back to see what’s happening behind me. I push open the front door of the college and breathe in a deep breath. Wow, wow, wow. I’m not frightened at all, I’m just feeling a huge adrenaline rush! Something about that little scene has unlocked something deep within me, I feel high, like I'm falling through the sky yet I know I will be okay.

I choose the long way home; it usually takes me forty minutes but today I walk slow, taking my time. I need to clear my head. Nearly getting pummelled by John is the first thing that I try to forget. Nobody needs to keep replaying a would-have-been-beating; it’s enough to drive anyone insane.

After sorting through all the shit in my head I decide to look around me and enjoy the beautiful things that nature has to offer. I notice birds flying gracefully through the trees, chirping away at each other. Small rabbits are running off underground, probably thinking that I am some sort of predator that’s going to run after them. And the squirrels were nattering away while eating the nuts that have fallen on the ground.

I strip out of my hoodie as I open the door to the house. My mum hasn’t finished work yet so for now it’s just me and my thoughts wandering around the house with no set destination. I wonder where the Pine brothers live… I gasp at this question; why do I even care where they live? I’m not going to be visiting them or going to theirs for a party or sleepover, am I?

After listening to music and going around the housing cleaning here and there, I decide to climb out of my bedroom window and sit on the roof where I usually go to think or to just have some alone time. I can see everything from here; I see all of the trees that surround the small path that I take to walk home, and the small road that my mum drives up to get to the house.

As I sit there looking at the sun as it dyed the clouds different shades of reds, oranges and yellows, I see a small glint of some object high in a tree. As I turn my head to get a closer look I notice something that shocks me. I’m expecting to see a magpie with something shiny in its beak, but in its place was some sort of feline. I shake my head and blink a few times to try and clear my head. I look back to the tree and there’s nothing there; whatever it was, it’s gone. I realise that I’m being stupid and I start to laugh, when I hear my mother’s car pull up into the front garden. After hearing her door slam I could hear her shouting up at me, scaring the life out of me.

“Emmett, Jesus Christ! Get your ass down from there before you fall and break something!” I look down to see her shaking her head and mutter before she walks through the front door of the house. Retracing my steps back down to my window I climb in and shut the window before my mother can complain more about the heating and keeping the house warm.

Running downstairs to greet her I grab an encyclopaedia of animals book from the bookshelf. I shout out to her to see where she is,

“Mumma, where ya hiding?” I hear her chuckle, which causes me to also.

“I'm in here, my lovely.” She is in the kitchen; this is where we seem spend quite a bit of time nowadays. When I walk in the kitchen I notice that she’s doing some sort or crochet pattern. I never really had any time for this sort of thing.

“Today was an absolute pain in the ass, Mumma.” I decide on telling her straight out that college had been shit today

“There are three new guys, the Pine brothers. Lessons are still the same, and John is still an asshole.”

No point in lying to her, she’s my mum and I tell her everything. I grab a drink and sit across from her. I sigh. She reaches her hand across and holds mine. I look up into her tired face.

“Emmett, people in this world can be cruel to you but you’re special; you are your father’s son. He was a strong man, ignore the people that don’t matter and focus on those who do.” I am sitting here with my mouth practically hitting the floor. This is the first time in years that she has even mentioned him to me, let alone say that he was strong.

After managing to pick my mouth up off of the floor, I’m tempted to ask her more about him but the moment passes. I can see her sadness, mentioning him is taking its toll on her. So hoping to make her better I decide to ask her about their lives before I was born.

Looking at her I whisper, “What was he like, Mum?” Well, her reaction surprises me to say the least, she smiles.

“He was a handsome man, your father. He had beautiful brown eyes, and short brown hair to match. Shorter than what yours is now I would say.“ Her smile continues to grow. “We met under a bridge one day while it was pouring rain. He was sopping wet, and he looked like a ruffled owl that had been rudely awoken.” I try to imagine her and my dad under the bridge, wet through and through and laughing about how they looked to each other. Looking at my mum now, I can imagine her doing something like that. I smile inwardly, this is helping her!

She looks at me and continues. “After I had calmed down, I asked him if he was alright, and he said to me that ‘a man is a fool if he was to be caught with a woman whilst wet’, he confused me but I smiled anyway.” She squeezes my hand hard, causing me to look at her.

“Your father was special, Emmett, I saw it. In his eyes, he was proud, smart, and fit. He completed me; he made me whole. I felt different with your father. He made me realise that there was more to this world than everything that I had ever been taught.” Now she’s confusing me. I frown at her, wanting her to explain more, but she is done for now.

“I will call you when dinner is ready, Emmett. Go and listen to music or watch some TV while I get sorted.” So I leave my book unopened on the table and go to my room so I can process my thoughts.

Later that evening, I lie in bed and think more about our conversation on how she met my dad. How was he so special? Was she hinting that I get my weirdness from him? I can feel tiredness coursing through my body but I am too hyped up to sleep…

I am falling through the sky, yet I’m not panicking. I look around me seeing forests that stretch for miles and small mountains that are dotted far away over the land. It’s like I am falling in slow motion, the ground is miles below me, yet I feel like I can brush my fingertips over the tops of the trees. I roll through the air onto my back, and above me falling a few feet is…J- Jayden? Yes! It’s Jayden! I feel so happy that he is here with me. As we were falling i noticed that he wasn't wearing his cap, i could see all of his face and it was, well... angelic, yet it screams bad ass. I smile and try look into his beautiful brown eyes. And slowly from his back, a pair of magnificent wings grows out and catches the wind, he is flying.

He reaches down towards me and then whispers, “Emmett, baby, trust me.”

His voice is filled with love and wanting, I feel myself grow inside of my jeans. I feel hot and sticky with sweat even though I’m falling ever so slowly down to earth. I don’t know why but I nod, yes, I trust him, I shouldn’t trust him but I do; I feel right in trusting him.

Suddenly he reaches down and grabs my hands, spinning us around. All of a sudden we’re now falling for real, so I grip onto his hands tighter. As we fall down to earth my back is searing with pain. I look to my right and see brown wings flecked with silver. I have wings, yet the ground is still approaching. Jayden pulls me to his bare, slightly hairy chest and kisses me ever so lightly. I am so shocked that I push him away. He stays airborne while I fall. Shutting my eyes I resign myself to the fall.

My eyes pop open and I feel my heart racing at 100 miles per hour and wait to calm myself down. Jayden kissed me! Then I start to recall the rest of the dream: the wings, the falling, and my death. I check my body, as I lie here calming down. Everything is fine, and I sigh. Except for the fact that my t-shirt is shredded and soaked with sweat. The pillows that I am lying on are also shredded up it seems. There are brown feathers dotted all over the bed. I sit up and pick up a feather; it is attached to something, and so I pluck it, which causes a small amount of pain to shoot through my shoulders… surely I don’t… I slowly creep out of bed. This has to be another dream, right?

I shut my eyes and stand in front of the mirror. I reach out and flick the light switch on. Once I hear the click I slowly open my eyes, and there they are: two brown wings that have silver flecks on the back. I turn to the right so that I can see my back. They fit between my shoulder blades perfectly, yet they feel like they’ve been there for years.

I stand there gazing at the wings that are beautifully led across my back, when I thought: how do I get rid of them…

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