Do You Know? - 2. Chapter 2

Chapter 3

“Charles wants you to let him drive this car,” Robbie said at around nine o’clock when Saki drove him to class.

“And you?” Saki asked, smiling at him.

Robbie chuckled. “I’ve been dying to ask, but I’ve been too busy.”

“Should we go out this weekend?” Saki asked. “I don’t know many places, yet. You can take us some place nice for the weekend. You’re not working right?”

Robbie glanced at Saki. “Are you serious?”

Saki nodded.

“Our first weekend away,” Saki said excitement in every word.

Robbie loved the sound of that. Perhaps time away together would get Saki to open up to him. He wanted to know more about his new boyfriend. Wanted to know why Saki always seemed as though he was filling his days with moments.

“We’re here,” Saki said, stopping at the culinary arts building. “I asked Charles to pick you up. I have to go somewhere today. I’ll be back late.”

“Where?” Robbie asked wondering if it had something to do with the black envelope on the coffee table.

Saki gave him a smile.

“Somewhere annoying,” Saki said, leaning over to kiss his jaw. “I’ll see you later.”

Robbie nodded and got out of the black Ferrari. He watched Saki turn in the parking lot, lifting his hand in a wave when Saki honked and drove off.

Robbie went through his classes on auto mode, his thoughts on Saki. He’d met the perfect man. Saki Masashi was everything he’d ever wanted in a partner. Fun, uninhibited, passionate, they fit so perfectly, their heat so hot; he sometimes thought they’d explode into flames. Robbie touched his lips, his eyes closed, remembering the feel of Saki’s lips against his. His heart clenched tight. Saki was…perfect. Yet, there was so much he didn’t know about him. So much he wanted to know, and Saki was keeping it hidden behind the highest emotional wall he’d ever encountered.

Robbie sighed.

“What’s with the huge sigh? Missing Saki already?” Charles asked, on their way to the Green at twelve. “You’ll see him later tonight. Jeez, Robbie, you’ve turned into a sappy fool.”

“You’re just jealous because you’re hanging out in our apartment alone,” Robbie teased.

“Please don’t tell me you want to move in with Saki,” Charles said, looking at him in panic. “We can’t bring in someone new right now. I don’t feel like breaking in a new roommate so close to graduation.”

Robbie scoffed. “I don’t think you have to worry about that.”

He and Saki hadn’t talked beyond what’s for dinner, and the coming weekend trip. He didn’t even know why Saki had moved here from Japan. He knew absolutely nothing about Saki’s life, other than he loved art and growing cherry tomatoes on the balcony.

Charles parked in front of the Green Restaurant. The upscale restaurant was packed for the lunch hour. Robbie reached for his duffel bag, and paused when Charles whistled low.

“Isn’t that Saki?” Charles asked, pointing to two men walking out of the Green. “He looks impeccable. I never imagined him in a suit.”

Robbie froze. His heart beat sped at the sight of Saki in a neat dark suit that hugged his frame to perfection. He wore a navy blue shirt, with an open collar. His bleached hair was neat, instead of the usual mess. Robbie recognized the man with Saki. He was the same one at the Skylax club, the one Saki had argued with.

Was he Saki’s old lover? The thought paralyzed him.

“Aren’t you going to say hi?” Charles asked when Saki and that man headed to a black Mercedes parked right at the front. “Where is he going? Do you know?”

Robbie wished he knew. That man held Saki’s arm with too much familiarity. He watched with envy as the tall man opened the back passenger door for Saki, waiting for Saki to enter before he followed.

“Guess your boyfriend has a huge rich secret,” Charles said.

“Shut up,” Robbie said as the expensive car drove out of the parking lot.

Robbie got out of the car and slammed the passenger door closed. He stalked into the Green wishing he could rewind his day to just before he saw Saki. He wanted to reclaim the feeling of having Saki to himself. How could he have imagined a guy like Saki would want to keep him? Want to be with him in a serious relationship?

***

“You should have let me wait longer,” Saki complained. “He was about to come in. Why are you so impatient, Jonathan?”

“Your love life aside, your father is not the patient types. We need to make it before four o’clock. Your father wants to see you before the meeting.”

Saki sighed and sat back, his arms crossed against his chest.

“I hope you know what you’re doing,” Saki said, glancing at Jonathan. “Shinji won’t like this one bit.”

“Let me worry about Shinji,” Jonathan said settling into his seat. “Meet your father, Saki. I hope you figure out what you want soon, it will make everyone’s life easier.”

Saki stared out the windows and wondered where Robbie had gone to. He’d wanted to see him before he went to see his father. He’d wanted a kiss from Robbie…or even one of Robbie’s tight hugs…or just to see Robbie’s face. It would have been enough to stop the cold tide sweeping into his heart.

***

Jonathan took Saki to a restaurant instead of the Masashi Co building. Saki adjusted his suit jacket, as he followed Jonathan down a well lit corridor to a private dining room. Jonathan knocked once, and opened the door, stepping aside to let Saki in to the room. Saki stopped after one step when he saw his mother first. She was pacing by tall windows, her arms crossed against her chest. His father sat at the set dining table having a cup of tea.

“Saki,” Keiko Masashi said. She stopped her pacing and hurried around the dining table.

Saki was engulfed in a tight hug, barely noting that Jonathan had stepped out and closed the door behind.

Keiko cupped his jaw, studying his face as though she were doing an appraisal.

“Are you eating? He’s lost weight, Ken. Do you see what this country is doing to my poor child?” Keiko sighed and kissed Saki’s jaw. “Not to worry, we’re taking him back today.”

“Mom,” Saki managed to get a word in, grabbing her hands in a gentle hold. “Stop, I’m fine.”

“He says he’s fine,” Ken Masashi said, sipping his tea. “Stop fussing, and have a seat, Keiko. I’m getting dizzy watching you.”

“You get dizzy when I sneeze,” Keiko said with a scowl, though there was no anger behind it. She smiled at Saki and took his hand leading him to the dining table. “Are you hungry, Saki? Did you eat? Of course not, you were traveling. We should order for you. Are stir-fried udon noodles good here? I know how touchy you are with food, Saki. You should eat—

“Mom,” Saki said with a sigh, sinking into the chair she pulled out to his father’s right. “Please stop worrying about what I’m eating.”

“Don’t be annoyed with your mother,” Ken said then. “She’s been worried about you. Sit down Keiko, you’re suffocating the boy.”

Keiko chose the seat to Saki’s right, taking his hand under the table, lacing her fingers with his. It felt a little as though she was trying to infuse energy into him.

Saki glanced at Keiko and gave her a small smile, hoping to assure her with confidence he didn’t have.

“Are you comfortable?” Ken asked after a few minutes. “Do you have any problems?”

Saki met his father’s gaze.

“No problems,” he said.

“Your brother is at the Masashi Co. offices,” Ken stated.

Keiko’s fingers gripped his tighter. Saki sat still, staring at the dining table. He didn’t know what to say to make this easier. His father loved Shinji, jeez, he loved Shinji too.

“I know what Shinji has done to you,” Ken said, pushing his cup of tea away. “Pulling you out of school, and dragging you here without your consent, I knew all of it.”

Saki met his father’s gaze afraid to ask why Ken had done nothing to stop Shinji.

“Your big brother is upset with me,” Ken said. “You understand that, don’t you?”

Saki returned his gaze to the mat on the table.

“Shinji needs to vent out his anger,” Ken continued, his tone reflective. “You’re the one he can touch, so I let him move you around as he wished.”

“Why?” Saki asked refusing to look at his father.

“You think I don’t love you?” Ken asked, making him glance up. Ken chuckled then. “Your expression is enough answer. Saki, you are my son. You should never doubt me.”

Saki looked away wondering how he could have avoided thinking his father didn’t love him.

Ken leaned his elbows on the table.

“Look at me,” he said.

Saki met his father’s gaze, his heart in turmoil.

“You have to find a way to make peace with your brother,” Ken said. “You are both important to me. There is no one else to leave this company to, but you two.”

Saki shook his head, afraid.

“Don’t do this,” he said. “Dad—

Ken reached for a folder resting on the end of the table on his left side. He held it out to Saki. When Saki didn’t take the folder, Ken placed it on the mat and opened it for him.

Saki let go of his mother’s hand when he read the title on the documents in the folder.

“Call it an early birthday present,” Ken said.

Saki lifted the folder; his head hurt like a brick had knocked him upside down. Inside the folder were controlling stock certificates. His father had transferred thirty-five percent of these Masashi Co. shares to his name. He added that to his existing three percent and gaped. He and Shinji were almost the same. Shinji owned forty-five percent of the voting stock.

Saki felt sick to his stomach. “What game are you playing?”

Ken smiled.

“I want to see what to expect of the future. So far, I’m quite disappointed, Saki.”

Saki closed the file and pushed it toward his father.

“I don’t want this. I want to stay at Ithaca, keep drawing—

“Nothing is stopping you,” Ken replied. “I told you, Saki, find a balance with Shinji. If you can’t do that, you are both going to lose it all.”

Before Saki could respond, Keiko took his hand on the table, squeezing it tight to stop his arguments. Saki frowned, looking at his mother in confusion.

“I have given you the tools you need.” Ken pushed his chair back and got up. “Let’s see how you use them, Saki. The folder is yours, for your records. I made the changes last week. There’s nothing to change. We need to get going, Shinji is waiting.”

The drive to the Masashi building was fast. Saki walked behind his father, feeling as though he was about to fall into a rabbit hole.

Worry took root when they reached the top floors of the building. Saki could barely breathe when they walked into the conference room to a full house. It seemed his father had called the entire board in for this meeting. There were familiar faces, others foreign—

Saki gaped when he met his brother, Shinji’s, gaze. Those dark eyes so icy, Saki felt frozen to the ground a few feet away from the seat Jonathan indicated was his. He feared he might have remained frozen had his mother not taken his elbow and pushed him into motion.

He sat down, his blood pressure at high gear. He refused to meet Shinji’s gaze, and instead spent his time staring at the bottle of water placed before him. At one point, his father urged him to stand up for an introduction.

Saki worried his knees would give out when he stood, giving a short bow, he sank back into his chair, careful not to meet Shinji’s gaze.

When the meeting ended, he ran out of the conference room fast, racing to the bathroom. He gave up the contents of his stomach into the closest porcelain bowl he could find. When he was done, he knelt on the floor, his eyes wet with tears. He hated puking. It always made him feel so out of control.

Grabbing tissue, he wiped his mouth and flushed the toilet. It took a minute to get to his feet. He leaned on the stall wall for a minute, taking in deep breaths.

Shinji was waiting at the sinks when he got out of the toilet.

“So, you couldn’t listen to my advice,” Shinji said in greeting, his lips curled into a smile that didn’t reach his eyes. “I warned you.”

“I had nothing to do with father’s plans,” Saki said turning on the faucet in the sink furthest from Shinji. He leaned down to sip water and rinse out his mouth. He almost chocked on the water when Shinji grabbed his collar at the back, and dragged him to the wall. Saki managed to save his face from slamming into the wall, bracing his hands against the cool tiles when Shinji pushed him hard.

“I asked you to find your place,” Shinji warned. “I don’t want to compete with you, little brother. Leave what is mine to me.”

Saki sighed. “Aren’t you jumping to conclusions? Have you seen me racing to take over your position? Shinji—

“Why would father give you so many shares? Why increase your voting capacity instead of adding me? Huh? Why? Unless it’s to give you my position,” Shinji ranted.

Saki closed his eyes. It had always been like this, since they were young. Every time their father did something nice for Saki, Shinji would find him later, and bully him for having been chosen.

“Bringing your mother along too,” Shinji scoffed into his ear. “This doesn’t change much, you know. I will never let you into a board meeting.”

Saki slammed his palm against the wall, pushing back, rage making him strong enough to push off Shinji. He turned to face his older brother.

“Enough,” Saki said. “I’m tired of you. Tired of this game, I don’t want to hear another word from your cold heart, Shinji. What the fuck did I ever do to you?”

Shinji scoffed, adjusting his suit jacket. “You dared to be born.”

“I can’t change that,” Saki said. “Neither can you, unless you want to kill me. If so, do it now. I’ll give you one shot.”

Shinji’s gaze narrowed. “Do you think I won’t do it?”

“Do it,” Saki challenged, anger he’d long bottled inside him rising. “Do it, Shinji, end it now!”

Shinji stared at him in surprise. Saki took a step forward, invading Shinji’s space, his gaze holding Shinji’s cold dark one.

“What?” Saki asked. “Can’t follow through? I should warn you, my mother is my next of kin. Even if you killed me, my votes go to her, brother.”

When Shinji just stared at him, Saki sighed and gave a small chuckle.

“All this time,” he mused. “You’ve made me cower with a glare, only to have you deflate. It’s disappointing.”

Shinji grabbed the lapels on Saki’s jacket, lifting him up to his height.

“Don’t imagine this is over,” Shinji said then with a sneer. “I’ll talk to father—

“By all means, run to his side,” Saki cut in, holding his brother’s angry glare. “I’ve tried to change his mind about his decision, maybe you’ll succeed. Go give it a shot, Shinji. Show me your might as you did in Tokyo.”

Shinji shook him then let him go.

Saki rolled his shoulders, straightening his jacket with one tug.

“I’m going back to Ithaca,” Saki said. “I should thank you for that, Shinji, I like it there.”

“Don’t get too comfortable,” Shinji said.

“Oh I will,” Saki said taking a step closer to Shinji, Saki brushed imaginary lint from his brother’s neat jacket. “I doubt you’ll be able to pull me out of there like you did in Tokyo. Don’t worry about the company, Shinji. I have no intention of being close to you until you come looking for me.”

“That will never happen,” Shinji boasted.

“What a relief for both of us,” Saki said, leaving the bathroom without a backward glance.

Saki hurried down the corridor in a daze, only allowing himself to lean on the wall when he was by the elevators, alone. His breath came in gasps; his insides trembled with adrenaline and anxiety in equal measure. He hadn’t meant to come on so strong with Shinji, but the hold against the wall had pissed him off.

“Are you okay?” Jonathan asked, appearing out of nowhere. He touched Saki’s shoulder.

Saki scowled at him. “I need a stiff drink.”

“Where do you want—?

“Anywhere is fine,” Saki said, pushing off the wall.

***

Robbie couldn’t help waiting up for Saki. It was almost midnight. Saki hadn’t called him, or sent a message. His imagination was on overdrive. Each time he closed his eyes, the image of Saki and that tall man in a suit filled his head.

Robbie didn’t want to imagine Saki in another man’s arms, still, the images persisted. Every second passing by, his gaze on the clock on the wall unseeing, he felt like an unhappy spouse.

Shaking his head, Robbie got up from the couch and paced to the wide windows in Saki’s living room. It was funny. He had come home from work intending to go to his apartment, and ignore Saki for the night. Instead, the moment he got on their floor, he’d acted on instinct. Using the key Saki had given him, he’d entered Saki’s apartment and found himself in the shower before he could stop himself.

Robbie folded his arms against his chest, staring out into the night.

Where was Saki?

The door banged open, a soft chuckle and a grunt had him rushing to see who was at the door.

He stopped when he saw Saki and the tall man from the restaurant. Anger rose unhindered. Saki’s left arm was around the tall man’s shoulders; Saki looked drunk, the stranger held Saki securely.

“Jonathan, make sure you take me to Robbie,” Saki slurred out, his head down as Jonathan tried to remove his shoes at the door. “Don’t drive me to a hotel, like you do when I get drunk. Robbie is warm. I’m so cold; I’m surprised you haven’t frozen from carrying me. Do you feel it?”

“No Sir,” Jonathan said, finally getting his shoes off. “We’re at your apartment.”

“Good man,” Saki said with a happy smile. He looked up and Robbie’s anger melted. Saki looked tired. “Oh…there is Robbie. I told you he’d be here.”

“Are you going to stand there watching?” Jonathan asked, glaring at him.

Robbie hurried forward, taking Saki’s left arm over his shoulders. He wrapped a strong arm around Saki’s waist and led the way into the living room. They helped Saki to the couch.

“Can I leave him in your care?” Jonathan asked, moving away with a tired sigh. “It’s been a long day.”

Robbie nodded, a frown dancing on his forehead. He started to walk Jonathan out, but the man held up a hand.

“You’d better not leave him. He’s an adventurous drunk,” Jonathan said. “I’ll show myself out.”

“Who are you to him?” Robbie asked his curiosity too strong to ignore.

Jonathan flashed a smile at him and answered, “His lawyer.”

Robbie frowned, watching the man leave as fast as he’d shown up. His retreat felt a little like an escape.

“Lie down beside me,” Saki said, drawing his gaze.

Saki had settled on the couch, his head resting on a cushion.

“Come on,” Saki pleaded, holding out his right hand when Robbie hesitated. “I’ll hold you, Robbie. I missed you all day.”

“Where were you?” Robbie asked moving closer to the couch, though he didn’t make a move to lie down beside Saki.

Saki sighed, his hand dropping to his side.

“I don’t wanna talk about it. Robbie, please, should I beg you?”

Robbie wished he had a defense mechanism to protect him from Saki’s gaze. That soulful gaze he could never say no to…Robbie bit back a soft curse, sitting down on the couch. He stretched out on the roomy couch and smiled when Saki snuggled to his side.

“You’re like a puppy,” Robbie said, wrapping his arms around Saki, rubbing his back when Saki let out a soft happy sigh. “All you ever want from me is to be petted and fed.”

“I love your scent,” Saki said against his neck.

“Saki.”

Saki pressed his forehead into Robbie’s collarbone, his arms around Robbie.

“My brain hurts tonight,” Saki said, in a whisper. “I’ll tell you everything tomorrow, Robbie.”

Robbie held Saki tighter. “I’ll remind you.”

“Tomorrow,” Saki said his voice heavy with sleep.

Robbie leaned back when Saki’s breathing changed, indicating he was deep asleep. Saki looked peaceful and handsome in his sleep. His lashes long against his skin. Robbie traced his finger along the elegant line on Saki’s nose, to the tip. His index finger moving to touch soft lips slightly parted. He leaned forward and replaced his index finger with his lips, kissing Saki. When he drew back, Saki moved closer.

“Robbie,” Saki murmured in his sleep, the sound of his name sent warm thrills through Robbie.

***

“Whoa,” Saki clapped his gaze on the tray full of warm cinnamon rolls in the middle of the kitchen table. “They smell so good.”

Robbie smacked his hand away when Saki reached for one.

“Go wash your hands,” Robbie said, pointing to the sink. “You were out there tending to plants, Saki.”

Saki sulked and went to the sink to wash his hands. “You’re so bossy.”

“And you’re impossible,” Robbie said. “You kept me on the couch all night, and when you wake up in the morning, you rush to the balcony to tend to tomatoes.”

“They’re fragile, Robbie,” Saki said. “I have them on a schedule and if I miss it, then they’ll think I’ve neglected them.”

Robbie watched him wipe his hands with a hand napkin. “What about me? I’m feeling a tad neglected over here.”

Saki dropped the napkin into the trashcan and moved to lean on the table where Robbie had laid out their breakfast. As always, it looked delicious: a colorful fruit salad, strawberry yoghurt, fresh orange juice and a cinnamon roll. Living with Robbie had its perks. He didn’t remember ever getting such a gorgeous breakfast in his life.

Saki glanced at Robbie. “I have a lot of things to tell you.”

Robbie sat in the chair across him, his gaze expectant.

“Today is Saturday,” Saki said with a small smile. “I promised you a drive in my car.”

“Will it be easier out there?” Robbie asked.

Saki lifted his glass of orange juice and sipped it. He gave Robbie a short nod in answer.

Robbie studied him for a moment, then reached for his glass of juice.

“Let’s have breakfast then,” Robbie said with a small smile.

Saki settled in his seat, and reached for the cinnamon roll. He took a bite, and gave an appreciative moan because the pastry was warm and delicious. The cinnamon and sugar teased his taste buds. He met Robbie’s gaze.

“You’re not neglected,” Saki said with a grin. “I think about you a lot too.”

“Do I get a schedule?” Robbie asked.

Saki laughed. “No way, I want you around me all the time; you’re the one who has me on a schedule. I have to share you with work, school, friends…I should be the one complaining about being neglected.”

“You’re in school too,” Robbie said.

“Am I?” Saki asked, thinking his credits were actually complete.

The only reason he was enrolled at Alexander University was to keep him quiet and in check. His brother was giving him a carefree lifestyle in return for not going after the company. If he turned in the projects in his storage downstairs, he’d receive his degree in Fine Art at the same time as Robbie’s graduation. Maybe it was time to think about the future and what he wanted to do.

“Saki?” Robbie broke into his thoughts.

He glanced up at Robbie with a small smile.

“I love the cinnamon rolls.”

They spent a lazy morning at the breakfast table. Saki helped Robbie wash the dishes, and then they dressed and left his apartment at ten in the morning. Saki handed his keys to Robbie when they were in the elevator. He leaned on the wall with a smile, when Robbie dangled the keys.

“Do you trust me with this?” Robbie asked.

Saki shrugged. “I trust you with me, the car is a toy.”

Robbie glanced at him. “What, like kindergarten? You’ll let me play with your toys?”

Saki winked. “All of them.”

His heart skipped when Robbie closed the distance between them and kissed him. Closing his eyes, he wrapped his arms around Robbie’s waist and savored the taste of Robbie, wanting to hold on forever. The elevator doors opened on the ground floor. Robbie kept his arm around Saki’s shoulder as they left the building.

Robbie drove around for an hour, showing Saki around Ithaca, and then they ended up at the Taughannock Falls State park.

“Charles, Todd and I come hiking here or for camping trips in the summer when our time allows it.”

Robbie gripped Saki’s hand as they walked along a path. They stopped at a scenic view; Saki stared at the water falling in a rush, creating music in perfect harmony with nature despite the cold weather.

“Beautiful, isn’t it?” Robbie asked leaning on the rail beside him.

“Perfect,” Saki said, turning to look at Robbie with a small smile. “If only there weren’t a dozen other people trying to take pictures too.”

“Are you getting used to Ithaca?” Robbie asked.

Saki tugged his jacket closed, returning his gaze back to the waterfall. “Yes, why do you ask?”

Saki glanced at Robbie when he didn’t answer right away. Robbie turned, leaning his back on the rail; he crossed his arms against his chest.

“I wondered why you’d need your lawyer with you,” Robbie said. “I saw you guys at the Green yesterday, right before I came in to work.”

“Why didn’t you say something?” Saki frowned.

Robbie shrugged. “I don’t know…I—I—thought, you two looked…

Saki chuckled. “I came looking for you. I wanted to see you before I left.”

Robbie gave him a surprised side glance, before he looked away. Saki didn’t miss the small smile that graced Robbie’s lips.

“So, you and that guy,” Robbie mumbled.

Saki leaned into Robbie.

“Me and Jonathan?” he asked.

Robbie met his gaze then, the doubt in Robbie’s eyes tearing at Saki.

“Not even in my dreams,” Saki said, a surge of warmth flooding him when Robbie’s face relaxed in relief. “You’re the longest relationship I have ever had.”

“You’re kidding me,” Robbie said.

Saki blushed and looked back at the waterfall. “I’m not.”

“Saki.”

“My family is the reason why Jonathan follows me around,” Saki said then. “My father is a rich bastard who ended up with three women in his life. Two died, and my mother is the last and only surviving wife. As a result, I have become the villain in my older brother’s life.”

Saki leaned on the rail.

“My brother, Shinji, is meant to have inherited the family business,” Saki said. “As a second son, I never gave it a thought, and only hoped to live life as I wanted, but my father has made that difficult the past year. He keeps talking of having me work with Shinji, went as far as turning me into a powerful piece on the chess board yesterday.”

“What do you mean?” Robbie asked.

Saki glanced at him and wasn’t surprised to find a frown on Robbie’s handsome face. He smiled and pressed a kiss on Robbie’s lips.

“You asked me what I wanted to do after graduation,” Saki said then.

“You said you hadn’t found your place,” Robbie said.

“I think I have,” Saki said, cupping Robbie’s face. “I like it here with you. I know you’re graduating soon, will you move in with me?”

“Saki,” Robbie said, “what about your family? What do you mean your father turned you into a chess board piece?”

“I am not interested in taking over my father’s company. It belongs to Shinji, although he is an idiot who doesn’t see me. I’ve decided to concentrate on my work. I can work from anywhere, so if you decide to move to Italy to learn to cook bread, I will go with you.”

“We bake bread, baby,” Robbie said with a laugh.

Saki leaned into him. “I want to be with you, Robbie.”

***

“I want to be with you, Robbie.”

Such simple words, they undid him. Robbie pulled Saki into his arms, holding him tight. He buried his nose into Saki’s hair, the scent of green tea shampoo invading his senses. He loved Saki. His heart ached with it.

“I want that too, Saki.”

Saki bunched his jacket. “Then let’s stay together. I want to see your restaurant, and hopefully, I can decorate it with some of my paintings.”

Robbie held Saki tight, afraid this was a dream. His wish come true so easily…it didn’t seem possible that Saki wanted him too. Closing his eyes, he breathed in Saki’s scent.

“I want to see that too,” Robbie whispered.

***

Saki got his paintings out of storage on Monday. He worked on them with diligence, throwing all his attention into gaining the degree he’d come close to gaining but hadn’t in Tokyo.

Two months passed with no word from his family. He got periodic visits from Jonathan; paperwork mostly needing his signature, Saki cooperated and focused on his new life with Robbie. Tensions were tight as evaluations drew near. He loved it most when after a long day; Robbie came back to their apartment, snuggling up to him in their bed. Saki loved it when Robbie held him tight, and fell into a deep sleep.

“Can you pick up in the bathroom when you’re done?” Robbie complained.

Saki smiled, bending his head low over the artwork he was drawing for a webtoon gaining popularity online.

“Are you listening to me?” Robbie called from the bathroom. “Towels on the floor, toothpaste uncapped, hair dye in the sink…you’re a disaster, Saki.”

The tirade was familiar. Some days he left the bathroom that way just to hear Robbie rail away for thirty minutes.

Saki inked his main character’s hair.

Two minutes later, Robbie came out of their bedroom carrying a laundry basket. He placed it on the coffee table, and came around to Saki’s drawing table.

“What are you doing?” Robbie asked, sinking his fingers through Saki’s hair. “You’re so busy; you’re not listening to me.”

Saki finished drawing and glanced up at Robbie.

“Should I get a cleaning service?” he asked.

Robbie sighed, and shook his head. “You’re obviously a spoiled brat. Do you know how much that would cost you?”

“I can’t believe I ended up with a thrifty boyfriend,” Saki pouted.

“I thought you gave up your father’s money in favor of freedom,” Robbie teased with a laugh.

“Doesn’t mean I give up the cleaning service,” Saki said. “Don’t make me scrub the sink again.”

Robbie stared at him then burst out into a laugh. “Gosh, you’re cute when you beg. Should we see how far we can push that side of you?”

Saki bit his bottom lip.

“S & M?” Saki grinned. “What are you the S?”

“You’re definitely the M,” Robbie leaned down and kissed him. “I’ll make you whimper the next time you dump towels on the floor, Saki.”

“Kinky,” Saki murmured, disappointed when Robbie moved away to get the laundry basket on the coffee table.

He picked up his drawing pen and would have started drawing but then a knock came on the door. Robbie abandoned the laundry basket and headed to open the door. Saki turned to see Jonathan at the door.

“Hi,” Robbie greeted with a friendly smile. “Come on in, you’re on time for some coffee.”

“I’m sorry to interrupt,” Jonathan said, stopping at the door, not making a move to come in. “I need to talk to Saki.”

“Come in,” Saki said with a frown.

“Its family business,” Jonathan said his tone urgent.

Saki glanced at Robbie. “It’s fine. There’s nothing to hide from Robbie.”

Jonathan gave him an impatient glance, stood unsure for a moment, before he went out.

Saki got up, concerned, Jonathan looked uncomfortable. He froze when Shinji walked into his apartment, he barely noticed Jonathan behind him, closing the door.

“Shinji,” Saki said, shocked.

“Can we find a private place to talk?” Shinji asked, his tone flat, hard to read.

***

In the natural order of life, Shinji should have been a warm older brother, protecting him from bad experiences, Saki thought. They should have ran in their family home’s gardens playing cops and robbers, hide and seek and pirates. When they got older, they’d have gone riding in their favorite cars, gotten in trouble with the neighbor for ruining the garden, or even stayed out late getting drunk.

Saki had spent his life craving such a relationship with Shinji. He’d wanted to see a small smile on Shinji’s face at the sight of him, even a nod of approval. Instead…he’d gotten cold looks, angry tirades, and worse.

Still…looking at Shinji now standing in his study…Saki marveled that the longing hadn’t disappeared. It still lived deep inside him.

His brother’s back was cold to look at, he thought.

Shinji stood by the windows, his arms at his sides, his shoulders a little slumped.

It worried Saki.

“Father is sick,” Shinji said into the silence.

Cold fear gripped his heart.

“What happened?” Saki asked.

“He’s been sick,” Shinji said. “His heart is not as strong as it was. He collapsed yesterday.”

“Why didn’t you call me?” Saki asked, feeling betrayed. “Which hospital—

“Father is stable,” Shinji said, turning to look at him. “He has the best doctors looking after him. He needs time to rest. I haven't had a chance to see him, but once today is over, I’m flying him home with your mother.”

“I want to see him. Where—

“We have more pressing concerns, Saki.”

“More pressing than our father’s health?” Saki demanded.

“Yes,” Shinji said. “I need your votes.”

“What?” Saki stared at his brother. “Are you insane? Our father is sick and you want to talk business?”

Shinji cursed under his breath, and in a rare moment of weakness, he ran his fingers through his hair and turned away from Saki.

“Don’t think me a villain, Saki,” Shinji said then. “You’ve won, here I am. I came looking for you. I’m begging you not to do this, right now.”

“Do what?” Saki asked confused.

“Masashi Co. means everything to our father. You can’t let outsiders touch it. If you choose them, we’re going to lose everything.”

“Choose who?” Saki asked, with a frown. “Shinji, what are you talking about?”

Shinji froze, his gaze on him. “You don’t know what is happening?”

“Start making sense,” Saki snapped.

Shinji stared at him for a moment then wiped a hand down his face. A soft chuckle escaped and Shinji turned back to the windows.

“There are board members who want to push me out of the C.E.O. seat, they think I won’t take the company in the same direction Father would have. They plan to vote to remove me later today. I’m surprised you’re not supporting them.”

Saki sighed. “I wonder if you know how much it hurts me every time you talk.”

Shinji continued as though Saki hadn’t spoken.

“Do you know how much I want to protect Masashi Co.? I don’t have time for emotions or feelings. Our father is ill, and I can’t even stay by his side.”

“You should have told me about father,” Saki said shaking his head. “Why do you push me away like this?”

Shinji turned to look at him. “I envy you, Saki.”

“What?” Saki asked, shocked.

“You’re the one my father loves,” Shinji said. “He’s done so much for you that he’d never do for me. No matter how strong I get, he still favors you.”

Saki laughed then because the alternative was to cry. “Is that what you think?”

“It’s what I know,” Shinji said. “You’re his precious son. That’s why I dragged you away from Tokyo when he dared threaten to give you Masashi Co. You have his love, his trust; I can only get the company, Saki. It pissed me off that he wanted to give that to you too.”

“Shinji,” Saki said, elated his brother would confide in him this way. “You’re my family. I love you. Dad too.”

“Are you sure?”

Saki stared at his brother, suddenly the cold he’d always seen surrounding his brother disappeared. All he saw was a vulnerable man standing alone, and it broke his heart a new. He and Shinji…he didn’t know how to fix them.

Shinji looked away then.

“If you can get ready, I need you at the offices this afternoon,” Shinji said. “You can see father after the board meeting.”

Saki wished he could move to hug his brother. He wanted to, wanted to melt the ice between them, like Robbie had melted his heart. His feet felt rooted to the ground though, he couldn’t take the step forward.

“Won’t you tell me where father is?” Saki asked then.

“Not yet,” Shinji said, holding his gaze. “It’s the only card I have that you’ll come to the board meeting. I will tell you afterwards. At least we have one thing in common, Saki.”

“What is that?” Saki asked in a whisper.

“We both love our father,” Shinji said then. “I know you understand what he would want here. I’ll wait for you in the car downstairs.”

Shinji gave him a short nod and left Saki in the study. Saki stared at the floor as he listened to his brother leave the apartment, the floor blurred as his eyes filled with tears.

***

Robbie held Saki’s hand in the back of the car. They were in Manhattan headed to the Masashi Company offices. Saki sat tense, staring out the window, closed off. Robbie squeezed Saki’s fingers, holding Saki’s hand tight, hoping to add his own strength to Saki’s.

His gaze moved to the man seated in the front passenger seat. Shinji, Saki’s older brother. They had a slight resemblance. Shinji’s cold demeanor clung to him like armor. Though, every time he looked at Saki through the rear view mirror, there was a hint of worry.

Robbie’s thoughts returned to the last few hours. After Shinji had left, he’d gone into the study to find Saki kneeling on the floor, tears tracking down his cheeks. The pain in Saki’s eyes hurt to see. When he crouched down, Saki clung to him and cried in hard sobs that hurt to hear. It had taken thirty minutes to calm Saki down.

That’s when Saki had told him why Shinji had come to see him.

“My dad is sick,” Saki said. “Shinji won’t let me see him until I go to an emergency board meeting. He thought I was plotting to take over the company. Now that he knows I have nothing to do with it, Shinji wants me to vote to keep him as CEO, only then will he let me see father. God, Robbie, this is the kind of family I come from. Can you handle it?”

“Then don’t,” Robbie said. “Don’t vote.”

“I have to help Shinji,” Saki said then. “I need to, because today, for the first time in my life, I realized that Shinji might not be as invulnerable as I thought. He’s probably the loneliest person in the world. Do you know how messed up that is? Do you, Robbie?”

“Saki,” Robbie said.

“I’m sorry,” Saki said on a sigh, his face buried in Robbie’s shoulder. “I—my brother and I, we don’t have the easiest relationship. I have always thought he hated me.”

Shinji met Robbie’s gaze in the rear view mirror now.

Shinji didn’t look like someone who hated his little brother.

Shinji looked away first, and Robbie returned his attention to Saki.

Saki sighed and squeezed his fingers as the car came to a stop in front of the Masashi offices.

“Stay with me,” Saki said in a quiet tone, when the door opened.

Robbie followed after Saki.

The board meeting was closed. Robbie waited outside pacing the length of the reception area. Someone brought him coffee and he drank too many cups, his gaze constantly returning to the closed doors. Saki had gone in a nervous wreck.

An hour and a half later, the doors opened and Saki came out followed by Jonathan.

****

“What happened?” Robbie asked when they were in the car again.

Saki glanced at him with a wan smile. “I fought valiantly for my brother.”

“He’s understating it,” Jonathan said from the front. “Saki told the board that Masashi Co. wasn’t up for sale, or manipulation. It was a family business, and that he and his father trust Shinji with the company. He effectively put all the greedy vultures to shame, and warned them he wouldn’t sit quiet if they tried to mess with his brother.”

Saki sighed. “Stop writing a movie, Jonathan.”

Robbie chuckled and leaned to press a kiss on Saki’s jaw. “You did well.”

“Shinji told Jonathan to take us to father,” Saki said. “I’m terrified, Robbie. I don’t want anything to happen to my father.”

“He’s going to be fine,” Robbie cut in.

Saki held his gaze for a moment, then nodded, his fingers clutching tight to Robbie’s.

***

They ended up at a hotel, on the top private floors. Robbie felt underdressed just standing in the lobby. Saki’s tight hold on his hand kept him from bolting right out the door. Jonathan led the way to double doors that opened into a lavish hotel room.

Saki stopped short when he saw his father seated on the couch in the living area reading a newspaper. He hardly looked like a sick man. Dressed in jeans and a light v-neck sweater he looked like a man ready for vacation.

“Saki-kun,” Ken Masashi said with a nonchalant glance at his son. “Who is your friend?”

“Dad?” Saki dropped Robbie’s hand and moved to stand before his father. “What are you doing up? I thought you were sick? Shinji was going on about your heart giving out. He’s worried sick.”

“Stop shouting,” Ken put his newspaper on the couch and touched his chest. “My heart might actually give out.”

“Did you play Shinji?” Saki demanded glaring at his father. “You have him thinking you’re dying. He wants to ship you home to Tokyo so you can rest.”

“Information, my dear Saki,” Ken said with a smile. “Very powerful currency. I haven’t allowed Shinji to see me. He’s been dealing with Jonathan.”

Saki sighed and shook his head. “Stop manipulating, Shinji.”

“How else is he going to learn?” Ken asked, his gaze shifting to Robbie. “Hello. Who are you?”

Saki sighed. “He’s Robbie, my boyfriend. Stop trying to change the subject.”

“This is a surprise,” Ken said with an unexpected smile. “You know you’ve never introduced your other boyfriends to me. I have waited to see what you would do when you got someone you’re serious about. Come here, young Robbie.”

Robbie found he liked Saki’s father. He extended his hand to greet Ken; his fingers were enveloped in a warm grip.

“Glad to meet you,” Ken said with a small smile. “Please ignore our family dramatics. We’re a strange bunch.”

“No problem sir,” Robbie said.

“Saki,” Ken said letting go of Robbie’s hand. “Thank you.”

“For what?” Saki frowned. “Did you rile the board into making a coup on Shinji?”

“No,” Ken said. “I have always wanted to see how they would react if I couldn’t be there anymore. I had Jonathan float rumors that I was ill. The result was having two of my long time friends start making moves to take over the company. That was why I granted you those shares.”

“You were testing me?” Saki asked. “Me too?”

“No,” Ken said. “Not you, I knew what you'd do. You’ve always been my favorite. Do you know why, Saki?”

Saki shook his head.

Ken smiled and glanced at Robbie. “His capacity to love is vast. Even though his brother has treated him terribly, he never stops loving Shinji. Do you know why? Once Saki loves he throws his whole heart in to it.”

“Dad,” Saki said.

“I knew you would protect Shinji in a way I couldn’t,” Ken said.

Saki shook his head. “I have found my place, dad. I don’t want to work for Masashi Co. I want to live with Robbie.”

“I don’t want you to work for Masashi Co.,” Ken said. “That’s Shinji’s place. He’s a bastard with a bad attitude, but Shinji is my son too. He doesn’t make friends easy, and that’s my fault. So, I want you to promise to protect him like you did today.”

Saki stared at his father then a wide smile broke out.

“I can do that,” Saki said.

“Good. Now it’s settled. I need to fly out before Shinji comes looking for me. I don’t think I can face his anger when he realizes I’m not ill.” Ken got to his feet, much too fast for someone meant to have a heart problem.

Saki shook his head. “He’ll figure it out, you know.”

“I know. Enjoy the hotel room,” Ken said as Jonathan opened the door for him. “I’m going on vacation with your mother, Saki. We’ll see you on graduation day.”

Robbie chuckled when the door closed and they were left alone.

Saki stood in the middle of the room stunned.

“You family is definitely not normal,” Robbie stated.

“Glad you noticed,” Saki said with a sigh. “Are you freaked out?”

Robbie faced Saki. “No.”

Saki faced him too. “They’ll show up at our place sometimes. Shinji always manages to make me cry. Some days he breaks me, completely.”

“I’ll hold you together,” Robbie said.

“Do you know?” Saki asked.

“What?” Robbie took a step closer, closing the distance between them.

Saki held his gaze with a smile. “I love you to death.”

Robbie’s smile widened and he pulled Saki into his arms, kissing him.

“I love you, too,” Robbie murmured against his lips.

***

Fin