Specter's Gamble - 19. Chapter 19

It was a week later when he tapped Jason on the shoulder while the older man was reading a book.

“Umm,” Desmond said after Jason looked at him with a silent question. “I think... Umm... Help me,” he finished in almost a whisper.

“Okay,” Jason simply nodded and returned to his book.

‘Okay’? That’s it? Desmond stood there for a minute or two, feeling like a complete idiot when Jason just sat on his chair, his nose buried in the book. Finally, Desmond turned around and went into his room, feeling completely lost. He didn’t know exactly what he expected, but it was definitely not just a simple nod, ‘Okay,’ and then nothing.

Later that evening, Desmond was sitting at the kitchen table, eating spaghetti, when suddenly, he felt Jason’s hands on his shoulders. He almost choked on his spaghetti.

“Easy,” Jason laughed, slapping him on the back when Desmond started coughing.

“I guess now is the helping time,” Desmond thought when Jason started massaging his shoulders.

At first, he was beyond tense – he couldn’t help it. Then finally, after fifteen or so minutes of shoulder rubbing, he started to feel himself to relax. He had to admit – a massage felt good. When he relaxed almost completely, he was startled again when Jason brushed his hair aside, and suddenly, Desmond felt his mouth on the side of his neck. He jerked and shivered at the same time. The feeling of someone’s lips on his neck felt strange. It was somewhat uncomfortable, since nobody kissed his neck before, but at the same time, Desmond could feel powerful vibrations the kiss was sending throughout his entire body.

Jason kissed him lightly, just brushing his lips over his skin. When his mouth slid down to the smooth curve of the neck transforming into shoulder, Desmond gasped. Suddenly, there was some weird tingling that was running all the way to his toes. Jason pressed his lips a little firmer against that spot, and Desmond’s mouth opened involuntarily. When he felt the other man’s tongue slowly running over his skin, he moaned loudly. And when Jason nibbled on his neck, Desmond thought that he was about to come undone right there, on the spot.

“Come on,” Jason said quietly, pulling his face away. “Come on...” and he ran his fingers through Desmond’s hair.

Desmond got up and followed him, his legs feeling as if they were made out of clay. They got into Jason’s bedroom and Desmond felt uncomfortable again. He had no idea what to do.

“Umm...” he said. “So you want me to get undressed or...”

“No,” Jason said and cupped Desmond’s face into his palms. Then his mouth brushed over Desmond’s lips, and the younger man closed his eyes.

He had never kissed anyone before. Come to think about it, nobody kissed him before either. No, he thought hazily, that wasn’t true. He remembered LeAnn placing a light kiss on his forehead once after Desmond helped her with a particularly nasty load of dirty dishes. That was different, however. LeAnn’s kiss felt motherly somehow. It felt safe and definitely not sensual.

This felt... Desmond didn’t even know how to describe it. He felt Jason’s tongue running over his mouth, and he slightly parted his lips. When Jason’s tongue slipped into his mouth, Desmond shivered again. It was yet another brand-new sensation. Desmond carefully tried doing exploring of his own, and his tongue timidly brushed across Jason’s lips. Jason buried fingers of his left hand in Desmond’s hair while his right hand kept lightly stroking the younger man’s face.

Later, when Desmond kept replaying the entire scene over and over in his head, he couldn’t even remember how and when they ended up on Jason’s bed. However, there they were; Desmond’s back leaning on the pillows, Jason on top of him, his mouth all over Desmond’s face and neck. After what felt like an eternity, Desmond felt Jason’s fingers unbuttoning his shirt. He was surprised when he didn’t feel uncomfortable at all this time. Instead, he was shaking from all those new sensations that kept shooting through his body. Jason was right – hands could only get you that far, he thought.

He had no idea how he was able to keep himself from exploding into his own pants for the entire time that Jason kept discovering new ways to make him squirm and moan. Jason’s mouth, his hands, fingers (hell, even his breath!) created a combination that was driving Desmond’s body completely mad. The tension was back, however, as soon as Jason took off his pants. The older man immediately felt Desmond tense and looked at him seriously.

“Don’t force yourself into anything,” he said quietly. “If something hurts or feels uncomfortable, tell me to stop and I’ll stop. But do not force yourself, okay?”

“Okay...” Desmond muttered.

The tension slowly crept away after Desmond closed his eyes, losing himself in an avalanche of sensations and feelings. His length ached and wept to be touched right now, but Jason would kiss and brush his fingertips all over Desmond’s body but that particular area. When Desmond felt the older man pull away, he opened his eyes. Jason was lathering his hand with some sort of lotion. Desmond blinked.

“What is that for?” he muttered, and Jason kissed his lips instead of answering.

“Try to relax,” he murmured. “I know it’s difficult, but just try, okay? It’ll feel somewhat uncomfortable at first, but it’ll pass, I promise... If you feel like you can’t handle it, tell me to stop, okay?”

“Okay...” Desmond said again, feeling somewhat bewildered.

He gasped loudly when he felt Jason’s finger pressing its way into his body.

“Try to relax...” Jason whispered, and Desmond tried his best to do so. At first, it didn’t work; it felt as if his body decided to lock up permanently. Desmond was about to moan for Jason to stop, to tell him that it was useless, to say that there was no way he could overcome his body’s reaction, when suddenly, he managed to relax enough for Jason’s digit to finally succeed.

Jason was right – it felt uncomfortable. It didn’t hurt, but it felt extremely uncomfortable. Jason started kissing his throat again and it distracted Desmond somewhat. He wasn’t concentrating on the intrusive feeling only -- now he was reacting to the feel of Jason’s mouth on his neck as well.

“Wh...” he tried saying a little while later. “What are you doing...? It feels like you are looking for something...”

“I am,” Jason agreed, his voice muffled somewhat from his face being almost glued to Desmond’s neck.

“What can you possibly find in there...?” Desmond tried to laugh. It didn’t work. “I mean it’s just an... Oh my God!!”

“This,” Jason smiled against his throat.

Desmond couldn’t even speak right now. Jason’s fingers brushed against something inside him, and the second it happened, Desmond felt like an explosion of pure bliss went off in his body. He was moaning loudly and he didn’t even notice that. He started bucking his hips, trying to get those fingers to brush against the same spot again. Jason knew what he needed, so he obliged. Desmond didn’t even realize that he was impaling himself on those fingers, rotating his hips, moaning louder than ever. This was unbelievable. He had no idea that something could feel this good. Jason pressed harder on that magical spot, rubbing it, and Desmond lost it. He groaned when his back flew off the mattress and an impossibly powerful release shook his entire body. He was riding it out for longer than ever, his breath hitched in his throat, eyes squeezed shut, body trembling all over. He could feel Jason gently kissing his neck, and that made the whole thing even better.

“Wh...” he was finally able to speak somewhat. “What was that...?”

“That was your prostate,” Jason said. “Good spot, huh?”

“Oh, God...” Desmond breathed. “That was... Oh, God...” he said again, and Jason laughed.

“You are one of the lucky ones,” Jason said, still smiling.

“Huh?” Desmond looked at him with puzzlement. “What do you mean?”

“This sort of stimulation alone can bring you over the edge,” Jason explained. Desmond frowned.

“You mean, not everyone can do that?”

“Nope,” Jason shook his head. “I can’t, for example. I mean it feels exquisite, yes, but it’s just not enough.”

“Huh...” Desmond said thoughtfully. Then he thought of something. “Oh...!” he said and Jason raised one eyebrow in a silent question. “You didn’t...” Desmond glanced at the other man’s hips, and Jason shrugged.

“Don’t worry about it,” he said. “That’s what my hands are for,” he added slyly and Desmond smiled at that.

“Do you want me to...” he started saying tentatively, and Jason interrupted him.

“No,” he lightly kissed his lips. “Go to sleep. You look like you are about to pass out. You can sleep in here tonight.”

Desmond did feel like he was about to pass out. He nodded and closed his eyes. Then he opened them a minute later.

“You didn’t go all the way,” he muttered and Jason looked at him seriously. “Why?”

“Because that would be too much,” Jason said simply. “And that would hurt. I didn’t want to hurt you.”

“But you stretched me and all...” Desmond muttered, and Jason rolled his eyes.

“Usually, a dick is bigger than a finger,” he said and Desmond snorted. “Well,” Jason shrugged. “Mine is, anyway... Go to sleep,” he commanded with a half-smile, and this time Desmond kept his eyes closed.

...They never went ‘all the way.’ In fact, they never did anything else. But ever since that night, Desmond felt differently about his own body. He felt like he was finally cured.

****

...“Sorry,” Desmond said again, and Jason just sighed.

“I’ll do it,” he said tiredly.

“But she knows your face,” Desmond frowned. Jason shrugged again.

“I’ll take my chances,” he said. “I’ll do it tomorrow night.”

...The next evening Jason left at seven-thirty at night.

“I’ll be back around nine,” he said.

“Okay,” Desmond replied in a small voice. “I’m sorry...” he added again, and Jason waved his hand at him.

“What’s done is done,” he grinned. “Next time don’t let your dick to make a decision for you because it’ll be a bad one, believe me.”

Desmond felt himself blush, and silently nodded.

...It was eleven-thirty at night and Jason wasn’t home yet. Desmond didn’t worry about it much – Jason knew how to take care of himself. He started to get worried, however, at two in the morning. Suddenly, Jason’s words sounded in his ears. “That woman is extremely intuitive... And she is ruthless...” Desmond’s worry started turning into fear. Finally, around three in the morning, he went to look for him.

...He found him not too far from the same club where Desmond met Lorena the night before. Jason was sitting on the bench, his shoulders slumped somewhat, posture stiff. Desmond realized why, when he got closer. Jason’s throat was slit from ear to ear.

Desmond stood very still, staring at his mentor. He stood there for a long time. Then, he turned around and went to the same motel where he made his mistake last night. He walked steadily, not too fast, not too slow. He looked like someone on autopilot. When he knocked on the door, it opened almost immediately. Lorena was wearing high-heeled shoes, a very short, lacy, bright-red robe, and nothing else. She obviously expected someone else because the minute she saw Desmond, her eyes flew wide in sincere surprise.

“Tony!” she exclaimed. That was the name he told her last night.

Desmond’s eyes darted around the room. Maybe it wasn’t her, he thought. Maybe it was someone else; maybe it was... And then he saw Jason’s watch (the damn thing cost a small fortune) on the small bedside table, and he immediately became very calm. So calm that he felt cold.

“Tony!” Lorena repeated, her eyes becoming more and more suspicious. “What’s wrong, love?”

He didn’t say anything; he just took one step towards her and placed both hands on either side of her head. She slightly parted her full lips, clearly expecting a kiss, and Desmond broke her neck in one quick motion. Then he let go of her, and the body fell on the floor with a dull ‘Thud!’ sound. Desmond slowly walked towards the bedside table, grabbed the watch, slid it on his wrist, and walked out of the room.

...When he got home, he locked the door, collapsed on his knees, and started to sob. He never wept harder in his entire life.

****

He woke up because someone kept softly calling his name, and someone’s fingers kept running gently over his face. He opened his eyes, realizing that his heart was racing. Gabriel looked at him seriously.

“What was this dream about?” he asked, and Desmond blinked.

“How do you know it wasn’t the same one?” he asked in a hoarse voice.

“You moaned in a different way,” Rayhe answered seriously.

“Huh...” was all Desmond said to that. Moaned in a different way? “Hell...” he thought, “...he can tell the difference between my moans while I am having nightmares...? God...”

Rayhe looked at him silently, clearly expecting another ‘I don’t want to talk about it’ answer. His eyes widened when Desmond muttered:

“I dreamt of finding Jason dead...”

“Who is Jason?” Gabriel asked carefully, and Desmond fell silent for almost a minute.

“He was my teacher,” he said finally.

Rayhe didn’t say anything to that. He just lay down and pulled Desmond closer. The assassin laid his head on Gabriel’s chest and closed his eyes. He let himself to get emotionally attached, he thought almost indifferently. Never mind the fact that Rayhe was never one of his marks, it was bad nevertheless. Emotional attachment never led to anything good, not in his line of work anyway. Even if he wouldn’t get hurt himself, he would definitely end up hurting Rayhe, and that would be even worse. “You need to get out,” he thought, listening to Gabriel’s heartbeat. “You need to leave, goddammit! Yeah, but if I leave now, the Salamanders will definitely kill him... They would have by now if I didn’t come back for him... Goddammit...”

The situation sucked big time. He had to figure out how to solve the Salamanders’ problem, and he had to figure it out fast. Because if he waited much longer, he would not be able to leave Rayhe, and that would lead to something extremely bad for both of them. “I have to...” he thought, and then he slid into sleep that sneaked up on him, the sound of Rayhe’s heartbeat calming him down better than any lullaby.