Inhospitable Place - 10. Chapter 10

6 Months Later

“Canine Salsa,” I announced with enthusiasm, popping my head into Derek's office. He raised an eyebrow.

“Canine Salsa?” he repeated, frazzled.

“That's the name of the new doggy dance class!” I replied as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. My arm was finally healing, and I was ready to step into the studio. He pondered it for a moment, then smiled.

“I like it!”

Two months later, Canine Salsa became the “IT” class. From couples looking for an unusual first date idea, to people thinking about dog adoption, everyone on the block seemed to be interested, much to the dismay of Tatiana who was in charge of the sign-up process. The high demand forced me to start hosting the class five days a week, bringing in invaluable funds for the shelter, and most importantly increasing the rates of adopted dogs. We even got our own one-page feature in the Hartford Times.

“I’ve got good news,” Derek said to me one day, sneaking up behind me as I was washing the dishes, and placing a quick succession of kisses on my neck.

We had started dating a few weeks after Hunter was arrested. It happened naturally. We were sitting together, having dinner and watching a movie with Bruno, when I blurted it out.

“I like you.” He turned his eyes from the TV and looked at me.

“I like you too,” he replied, then leaned in to kiss me. A soft kiss that sparked a warmth in my chest. Suddenly I realized how cold I had been all this time, without even knowing.

Francesca decided to move into my old apartment, and Bruno and I migrated over to Derek’s place. She turned the studio into a spare bedroom, for when our dad came to visit.

“What is it?” I asked Derek, inquiring about the good news.

“With the money we’ve got coming in, we can soon afford to expand and build additional units. And with the flood of volunteers generated by your classes and the Hartford Times article, we’ve had an incredible number of foster parents signing up. So, we are now officially a No Kill shelter,” he says to my great surprise. “It’s all thanks to you.”

“No,” I reply, already crying. “It’s all thanks to him,” I say, looking at Bruno, who has managed to heal his broken leg fairly quickly, and who is even starting to slowly look trimmer thanks to Derek’s diet plan. The dog sighs and walks off, realizing he isn’t getting any snacks, and we both laugh. Some things never change.

The day the euthanasia room is knocked down in order to create a larger space to host my Canine Salsa class is one of the most special moments of my life. The death chamber transforms into a place of joy, dance, and laughter. Something good is born out of something bad. The barren landscape becomes lush with life.

There are still nights when I wake up in the middle of the night, sweat dripping all over my body, and feel a pair of icy blue eyes staring at me from across the room. I scream, frightened that he’s come back to finish the job. That’s when Derek soothes me back to sleep.

“You’re okay, I got you,” he whispers, holding me and rubbing my back. “He’s locked away for life. It’s just a dream.”

But the year I spent with Hunter wasn’t just a dream. It was real, which is what scares me the most. The nagging question of how I could have missed the obvious. And the knowledge that he never really loved me. He couldn’t have—his heart was an inhospitable place.

Francesca and I sat through his trial and were both called to testify. I was fine describing everything that happened to me that night, and the prosecutor stood in front of Hunter so that I wouldn’t have to stare into the icy blue abyss of his soul. But having to hear the medical examiner’s testimony about the atrocities he committed against all the other victims was like being forced to stare into the face of evil. It knocked the breath out of me.

Knowing he was in prison for the rest of his life helped to ease my mind a bit. But I was certain that his presence would follow me for the rest of my life. It wasn’t something I would ever just forget.

But just like with the euthanasia room, my close call with death also brought about something good. It reminded me about the fragility of life, and the importance of living and loving.

In the morning I kissed Derek’s mouth and his sleepy eyes, then took Bruno out on his walk. I thought about how amazing it was to be present on this Earth for the time that was given to each of us. I shivered in the cold air, as my brain buzzed with excitement for all the things that were yet to come: the highs and lows, the successes and failures; I welcomed them all. I inhaled the fresh air and looked up at the sky with a heart that was grateful to beat.

“See you one day mom. But not anytime soon,” I said, and smiled. And for the first time since she had been gone, I could feel her smiling back.

The End