Sex, Money, and Fame - 8. Chapter 8- Drowning Like a Bird

Caroline remembers watching her father perform, and being amazed. Aaron Abrams was energetic, charismatic, and loved being the center of attention. Caroline would watch from the wings, running around the glowing stage, partially bouncing off the walls. Covered in sweat, but smiling all the way. Caroline remembers the crowds, singing along. He’d stare out, connecting with as many people as possible.

“I love you,” He’d say into the microphone, before walking off, scooping Caroline his arms.

“What do you think about all this, Care Bear?” His voice was so happy and confronting. His smile was so beautiful.

“I want to be like you, Daddy.” She’d say.

***

Desdemona wore big thick sunglasses, a black wig, and turtleneck, so that she would be in disguise at the open mic night. Caroline also wore a disguise, but not as literal as Desdemona’s. Tonight would be her first time, singing in front in a crowd. Her opportunity to prove that she was talented.

She tied her hair back, wearing a crop top and ripped jeans.

What Desdemona would wear.

She caked her face in make-up, wearing more eyeliner then she ever has in her life. She thinks she looks hot.

When they are called on. Desdemona sits in the chair with her guitar. Giving Caroline nothing to do but sing.

Caroline stands at the microphone and looks out into the crowd. Stomach pulls down into her intestines.

“Hi.” She barely speaks into the microphone, “I’m Caroline…and this is a song I wrote.”

All there people are just staring at her, watching her.

Desdemona begins to play. Mouthing, “Breathe.”

Caroline opens her mouth, and only a sort of whimper comes out.

“I’m...”

Desdemona starts the music over. The crowd looks at her so...mean. Nothing like crowds that cheered for her father.

“I’m...drowning like...like”

A lump in her throat formed. She suddenly couldn’t move her tongue.

A guy in a mohawk looks at her mocking girl choking. They are all quiet and...moody. Caroline feels a sudden moisture on her. The crowd raised their eyebrows, sitting up in their chairs. Caroline blinks and realizes that she is crying. In front of all these strangers. And the dam broke open. She starts uncontrollably sobbing. Desdemona gets up and glides off the stage.

***

Desdemona listens to Caroline hyperventilating in the parking lot.

“I’m so stupid.” Caroline sobbing on the hood of a car, “I choked. I got on stage and died.”

“It’s your first time.” Desdemona tries to confront her.

“You don’t get,” Caroline yells to the whole parking lot, “I’m supposed to be good at this. Genetically good at this.”

Caroline sees Desdemona looking down at her phone.

“Hello.” Caroline claps her hands, “I’m having a nervous breakdown here.”

Desdemona looks up. Her lip hanging out and her eyebrow pinched.

“I...have to go,” Desdemona says.

“What?” Caroline stomped, “To go where?”

Desdemona bites her lip, staring back down at the concrete.

“Do you want me to help you get a cab? I’ll pay…”

“I can pay for my own cab.” Caroline says, “But I do want to know what’s going on?”

“I just gotta go,” Desdemona says, unlocking her car door.

“Is there another girl?”

“Yea, sure,” Desdemona grabs the door handle.

“So you’re ditching me for a booty call?” She yells.

“If that’s what you need to believe,” Desdemona yells back.

“God, I hate you,” Caroline whines, stomping her feet as Desdemona gets into her car.

Desdemona bites her lip and drives away.

***

Desdemona, Riley, and Justin pull up in Justin’s truck into the back alley of the sketchy East LA club. Desdemona calls Jesse, again and again, trying to keep him on the phone. The three of them scream for Jesse.

Desdemona spots a body laying face down on the gravel.

“Justin stop.”

Justin stops the truck and Desdemona runs out to the body. She makes out Jesse’s face and shakes him. He doesn’t move. She gasps.

“He’s right here,” She cries, barely being able to speak.

The boys run over. Riley hugs her as he sees the haunting look on Desdemona’s face.

“Can you grab his legs?” Justin calls out.

Riley kisses her on the cheek and goes to help him. They pick up Jesse’s body and carry it to the truck. Desdemona hyperventilates, hearing the sound of them putting Jesse’s body in the bed of the truck. She breathes heavy, trying to calm herself but failing. Riley climbs into the passenger seat and gently grabs her hand.

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