Ghost and Snow - 2. Chapter 2

Frank felt his presents when he was outside. He could feel him come into the house. If he had had breath it would have caught in his throat. Watching him through the window he saw his black hair blowing around his face, his pale skin illuminated by the light of the moon. Shivering from the chill he let his eyes rest on the boy sitting on the couch.

He couldn’t wrap his mind around why he could feel the cold. This is the first day he experienced any of his senses in four years. Tomorrow is Halloween, and his birthday.

Yes, he felt everything. Even pain. He thought about the boy sitting on the couch and was standing in front of him in the blink of an eye. He began to feel himself breath, he could see himself, even his hands as he raised them in front of his face. He knew that he couldn’t see him, Gerard couldn’t feel him, not where he was on the couch.

He squatted down to his knees leaning closer to him, he froze loosing himself in his deep hazel eyes, just as he had long ago, it seemed so long ago, in reality it had only been four years, four long agonizing years. He longed to touch him.

“Please let him feel me. Please.” He said as he leaned closer and brushed his lips with his own. He felt the softness, and he could feel his breath on his cheek.
Gerard didn’t move, still captured by the book in his hand.

“Damn it, I’m right here! Look at me!” Frank screamed.

Gerard, still, never moved so much as an eyebrow. Frank raced back up the stairs, tears streaming down his invisible cheeks. He slammed his fists against the walls as he went.
In his room he snatched up a hairbrush and began hitting the metal of the bed.

TAP TAP TAP, over and over. His anger searing through his soul. He wasn’t sure if Gerard would hear it, but the last time he was so emotional he was able to stop that stupid pimply kid from strumming his guitar. The nerve! Picking up his guitar. He shook his head at the memory. He was surprised, that day, that he could touch a person.

He had done more than touch him. He felt bad, later, but that was his guitar! He wanted to kill him. He was proud of himself, that he controlled it enough, not to kill him. He wanted Gerard to hear him, so he slung the brush into the wall, it made a crashing sound as soon as it connected with the wall.

YES! But, did he hear it? He went to the stairs and there he was looking up at him. Can he see me? No I don’t think he can. Gerard walked back to the couch to sit back down.

"Nooo." Frank thought frantically trying to will Gerard back.

“Gerard!” he said trying desperately to be heard.

“What the fuck?” Gerard said in a whisper.

Yes! He heard me! Oh god, now what? He ran to his room and flung himself against the wall, it hurt for a second, nothing like it would have hurt had it been when he was alive, but there was a dull pain non the less. This was new. He touched the wall, this mystery would have to wait, he had to get Gerard up here.

He ran back to the landing of the stairs. Please, please come up here, please. He saw that Gerard was on the stairs. He didn't know why, but he knew Gerard needed to be in Frank's room, Like the knowledge you have in a dream, It was just there.

"Who's there?" Gerard said. Shock touched Frank, How can he see me. Doesn't matter how. He does!

So he stayed in plain sight of the man, until he began to move.

"Yes, follow me," he thought.

And he walked back into his room. Gerard walked in behind him and frank was watching every move he made. Tears began to slide down Gerard's cheeks as he picked up the pillow, Frank walked closer to him, touching his skin, he couldn’t help it, he missed him so much. Letting his face move closer he had the urge to kiss the back of his neck.
Gerard couldn't see frank while he stood in front of him. Frank had no idea what was happening, but something was. Something.

“I’m loosing it.” Gerard said Frank inhaled sharply.

He felt that! Oh my god he felt that! He was grinning like a mad man.
~

The cold air ripped at his lungs as he took it in, standing outside the window. He knocked on the door rubbing his hands together, the early December weather was eating into him through his clothes. Snow blanketed everything in front of him. He loved the snow. The door opened and Frank grinned at him.

“Hi” he said. Gerard smiled at him as he walked into the house.

Frank wrapped his arms around him pushing his body into him forcefully, hugging him, but Gerard hesitated.

“No one's here, just you and me.” He said smiling up at him. His heart leaped in his chest. He hugged him back laughing as the climbed the stairs letting go of the hug but allowing their hands to stay together.

“Dad is gone for the week, he left me alone for five whole days, he said now that I’m fifteen I can take care of myself!” Frank beamed at him.

“That’s awesome, Frankie, my mom wouldn’t let me stay home by myself, no way she would.” He said smiling.

“Well your mom loves you, she worries all the time.” Frank said giggling.

It had happened only a few months ago, he had realized that he was in love with his best friend, in all of his 16 years Gerard had never felt so much for someone. He was shocked that Frankie felt it too. They had been together for two months as more than friends, but it was a secret, no one could know. Frank moved to the bed and sat down beside Gerard. He slid his arm around Gerard’s waist. Gerard pulled him into him loving the heat it was creating.

He bent down and found Frankie’s lips, kissing him deeply. Such soft lips, Gerard marveled. He loved Frank's taste. Frank shifted and let his hands slide through his hair. Moaning into his mouth. Frank slid his hands under Gerard’s shirt pulling it from his body.

Gerard did the same pulling Frankie’s from his body too, unsnapping the snaps on his jeans he slid his hand in, gripping the hot mass softly he began to stroke him. Slowly at first, then with more force. His heart raced and he could feel the rush of adrenaline moving through him. Frankie had the urge to feel him tremble beneath him. He had only been down on him one time, not really sure of what to do, but doing to him what he thought would feel good.

He slid his pants off and let them fall to the floor. Gripping Gerard’s he pulled them free and took his underwear with them. Smiling, he bit his lip while he looked into Gerard's eyes. He dipped his head down and slowly kissed his chest, running his tongue in circles, he smiled happily when Gerard moaned.

Goosebumps littered Gerard's skin. Trembling with the sensation. He left a small wet trail down his chest as he descended toward Gerard's nether regions. Taking him into his mouth he savored the trembles from Gerard’s body. It was all they had done so far, afraid to do anything more. It was good enough, it felt so good when Gerard did this to him, and he had done it twice by then.

”Oh god Frankie, I love you so much.” Gerard said. His head slid back and his eyes closed in pleasure.

“WHAT THE FUCK? You, you are, what the fuck are you? How, when, FRANK! Are you insane!? How the fuck?” His dad stood in the doorway his face bright red. Frank jumped back from Gerard his face a mask of fear.

“Dad, it’s not what it looks like!” Frank said knowing full well it was what it looks like, but isn’t that what you were supposed to say?

Gerard was shakily trying to fight his pants back on but they were winning the fight and it wasn’t working like it should. Frank sat, a numbing shock ripping through his mind, holding the blanket that he now wrapped around himself. His eyes still like saucers staring at his fuming dad in the doorway. His dad was glaring at Gerard.

“Get the FUCK OUT OF MY HOUSE NOW! You piece of shit! Get out! get out! get out!” The words flew from his lips as if they were acid.

Gerard fled, not knowing what else to do, he wanted to drag Frank with him, he knew that there was a beating coming. He wanted to save him, he just didn’t know how a 16 year old could stand up to that angry mass of hate. When the sound of the door slamming filled the house he stormed over to his son and snatched him from the bed by his hair.

“Are you ignorant, or just stupid?” He said gritting his teeth.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, but dad, I love him.” He said tears falling down his cheeks

“Love! You Love him, What the fuck? I thought I raised you better than that!" His hand connected with his son’s face rocking his entire body.

“You stupid fuck!" His dad said.

Anger ripped through him as he looked at his son in disgust. Before he knew what he was doing his hands were around frank’s neck and he was squeezing, all the frustration of having to care for him and do it alone, sense the boy's no good mom had left them five years earlier. All the built up anger at her and at Frank were in his hands and he squeezed with all his might. Frankie made no noise he only struggled for a few minutes.

Then he went limp. His dad continued to squeeze. He had no idea how long it took him to get himself under control, but by then it was too late, by then Frankie was standing next to his father. The realization of what he had just done seeped into the mans eyes. Frank saw the shock in his dad's eyes when it emerged.

He rested his eyes on Frankie’s motionless body, he felt for a pulse and there was none, he lay his ear next to his son’s mouth and felt nothing. He tried everything he knew to try and breath life back into his sons body, but it had been to long. Chocked sobs erupted from his throat. Tears fell from his eyes blurring the room.

“I’m so sorry.” He said. Pulling his son into his lap, caressing his face. The anger was gone, replaced with helplessness. He never meant to end his only son's life. Never thought he could hurt him in this way.

Frankie was standing next to him through all of this.

"It's alright, I forgive you." Frank whispered.
But his dad couldn't hear him now. Frank was there when his dad called the police, he was there when they took his body and his dad away and he stayed there. He couldn’t leave.