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    R. Eric
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Matt Stryker - 3. Chapter 3

Eric and Matt go to Australia and start their lives. How they will interact as the world watches. Then Eric meets Matt's mother and brother. Eric's mother marries Floyd.

And I entered a whole other world. We were just first class to Atlanta, but once there, we were put in the VIP lounge to wait for our connection to Los Angeles. After experiencing the hustle of the main airport before, I could see the lure of the lounge. It was quiet. A very few were here as a soft relaxing classical piece was piped in. “Damn.” Was my first impression. Matt looked up with a chuckle. He was studying his script.

“Okay.” Matt began. “Quiz me.” He tossed me the script.

I raised my eyebrow. “Quiz you?” I wanted to understand.

“Pick a page, any line that mine follows and see if I know it,” Matt explained.

I grinned. This could be fun. “Okay.” I flipped through pages. It was a good script. Most of the cast were Australian. Matt played Monroe, a Civil War veteran who came to Australia after all the trauma in the United States and having lost his wife and children during that horrible war. He meets Victoria, Felicia Combs character who is being terrorized by men who want her ranch. Monroe recuses her and, in spite of trying not to, falls in love. Yeah, it was corny, but it had potential. No bad parts. Bad actors. And Matt was a phenomenal actor.

“Oh, Monroe, I’ve never been with anyone other than my husband,” I said with my best girl’s voice. Just remember, I’m not an actor.

Matt’s eyebrow rose and a slow smile spread across his face. “You choose that line?”

“You said any line,” I replied back to my own voice.

Matt grinned. “A little Southern, but okay.” Then I watched as his whole body seemed to change. Here before me now was now a broken man, his voice now grainy and I swear, he had a Yankee accent he didn’t before. “Victoria, I know what it’s like to lose someone you love.” He said it so well. “I lost my wife and children. Your husband has been gone for two years. Can’t you give your heart another chance?” He was back to being Matt. “You know the next thing we're supposed to do.”

I nodded. “I do. We can practice that in private.” I waggled my eyebrows at him.

Matt now laughed heartily. “I’ll hold you to that.”

We landed in Los Angeles but returned to Angel Gomez and Matt’s temporary home he rented. She was away, so we had the place to ourselves. Matt and I did rehearse the next scene which was a very passionate love scene. If he did that to Felicia, she might object. She may not. But I loved it and I loved Matt. Then again, I didn’t want him to do what he’d done with me with her.

We flew by Qantas the next morning. It seemed we flew for a day and we did! But landed in Sydney. No time to enjoy sightseeing and look around. We took another small plane to Alice Springs, and yet, we still weren’t there! Alice Springs was the first large town near where we needed to be with an airport. The closest….anything closer would have been White Gums. No airport there of any kind. No, the set was near this great house in a valley. There was a river that ran by and because of the shading from the mountains had trees and water there, there was much more foliage. Our driver was what I had come to know as a real Australian. Blonde and suntanned. He was in his thirties, but sun damage left creases in his skin. But he was handsome in his way and more important, he was happy!

“Yep.” He said pleasantly, the accent very distinctive. “You’re the bloke I was sent for. Come on.” He motioned to Matt. “We’ll get your luggage.”

“And him.” Matt pointed out. “Mister….” He left the statement open in the form of a question.

“Alan Blake.” The man greeted sticking his hand out to Matt, then me. “It’s nice to meetcha’!”

I liked him. He was open, charming and had a twinkle in his blue eyes that was as real as it could be. “Mr. Blake.” I greeted.

“Oh, call me Alan. Mr. Blake was m’father.” He waved us to follow. “Come on, let’s not waste daylight. You know Tom is a bloody dill when it comes to schedules. We’re off to back o’Bourke.”

Matt almost smiled because Alan was using terms like we knew them. “Are you speaking English?”

Alan nodded with a grin. “Oh, yeah, you’re not from Oz. Sorry. Tom Cunningham is the director. I said he’s a real idiot for sticking to schedule. He always finishes at budget. That’s why they hire him. He does good work for the price negotiated.”

“We aren’t from Oz?” Matt asked. “I take it, you’re not talking about Dorothy’s Oz.”

Alan heartily laughed and waved him off. “No, that’s what we call Australia.”

“Oh,” Matt commented simply, but he was liking Alan as much as I was. “Okay.”

We rode through some roads. Finally getting to a windswept blue house. It might have been grand, a few years ago. But it had an appeal I couldn’t put my finger on. The environment here at times was harsh and it would have been an annual event to keep the pale blue from fading. It had a rustic elegance.

“Tom and Miss Felicia are housed inside. The rest of us are out here.” Alan pointed to a group of white…not trailers…containers. Portable. They couldn’t have been more than a room wide and deep. “In spite of how they look, they’re pretty comfortable.” He glanced at Matt. “Yours is, that is. His and mine are a bit more….basic?”

Matt frowned. “His verses mine? No, we share a space.”

I held up my hand. “It’s okay, Matt.”

“No, it’s not,” Matt argued, now getting angry, not at me, but at the situation that occurred. “How are you gonna do your job if you aren’t there?”

“Calm down. We’ll deal with it.” I said softly, then louder to Alan. “Where is Anita?”

Alan looked back. “Anita is around somewhere. She’s getting people in their places.”

“I need her now,” I said calmly.

Alan shrugged. “Okay.” Isn’t it no worries what they say?

Anita was a woman in her early forties and looked very tired. I could see it. Shorts and shirt drenched with sweat. “Is there a problem?” She asked sounding annoyed.

I opened a large manila folder. “Where am I to be housed?” I asked calmly.

“With the support staff.” She pointed off behind her with her clipboard.

I opened a ream of papers. “On this signed contract, page 20, I have a signed promise. Accommodations for two, with kitchen. I am not just support staff. I am also his nutritionist. I monitor all meals, prepare said meals and make sure he follows it. This was signed by your studio president.” I showed her the signed contract.

She sighed. “We can’t do anything now.”

I nodded and turned to Alan. “Alan, please take us back to Alice Springs,” I said.

“You begin shooting tomorrow!” Anita objected alarmed.

“Without Matt.” I nodded. “These terms will be honored, or…” I opened to another page. “Matt has the right to cancel if needs are not met. I hear Tom is a stickler for schedules, you make sure he knows why it’s been delayed and it was because the contract wasn’t honored, not Matt.”

Matt was angry, but after hearing what I said and all the things I pointed out was grinning. He just shrugged. “My personal assistant and manager.” He pointed at me.

Anita looked at me doubtfully. “This kid!?”

“He’s a smart kid,” Matt said simply. “Are you honoring the contract or not?”

Anita looked around. “Yes, yes…I’ll come up with something.”

“No.” I shook my head. “You’ll honor your contract. There was a reason it was negotiated this way.”

It was another hour before we moved into our cubicle. A little two-room habitat.

“There is just one bed.” Anita pointed out.

“There’s a sofa.” I pointed to the sofa in the sitting area. It did have the kitchen I needed. “Now, there were arrangements made that had some crates, of produce and food supplies.”

“What’s wrong with the studio supplies?” Anita asked.

“Is it free range? Are the fruit and vegetables chemical free? Are the spices fresh?” I asked.

Anita shrugged. “I don’t know.”

I nodded and smiled patiently. “That’s why I need it,” I said. “Also in the contract.”

“Now you know why I put this kid in charge.” Matt grinned a bit evilly. “I told you he was smart. And he’s efficient, too.”

“Okay, okay.” Anita nodded. “I’ll…find it.” She left in a huff.

“Who are you?!” Matt asked me marveling.

“You’re personal assistant and now manager, since you said that out loud where others heard it.” I grinned. “And someone who read your contract and negotiated on the phone with studio president and had him send the contracts to me. Which I read.”

Matt shook his head in disbelief. “Wow.” He put his arms around me. “I was right to hire you.”

I nodded, locking the door. “I’ll make you believe it. I’ll do a good job for you, Matt.”

“You will and I already believe in you.” He leaned in kissing me. “I love you, Eric Richards.”

“You can show me how much later.” I chuckled pushing away slightly.

He literally groaned when I pushed him away. “Aww. It’s been hours!”

“And it will be a few hours more.” I felt the need to connect too. We kissed once in the air between Hawaii and Australia. Oh, and the quick kiss in the bathroom in Sydney. That was it. “There are too many eyes and ears here.”

Matt sat wearily. “I know. I’m so tired, I don’t think I could function too long anyway.”

I sat on the sofa next to him kissing him gently. “I know. But know this…you are the most important human being in my life. We’re lovers now, but you are also my best friend. I will always be on your side. I really love you, Matt.”

His smile grew as I said it. “I know. You’re my best friend, too. I love you.” He kissed me passionately when we heard the door was attempted. I got up, straighten my clothes, but Matt pulled his shirt off and unzipped his pants. He motioned to the door to unlock it.

I shrugged but smiled when I got it. I unlocked the door.

“Why is this locked? We weren’t finished.” Anita asked as she saw Matt putting his pants back together. “Oh.”

“Knock next time!” Matt barked. He turned back to his suitcase. “A man can’t even change after hours in the air in private!” He didn’t quite shout. “I’ve flown thousands of miles and want a shower and get some sleep!”

“You’re doing a nude scene. Why wait?” I asked shrugging.

Matt didn’t miss a beat. “That’s different! I’ll be working! Not changing! I can’t expect privacy!?”

Anita backed away holding her hands up to stop his ranting. “I’m sorry, sorry…”

“A locked door means something in Australia, doesn’t it?” Matt growled, but quieter.

“Sorry, sorry. Yes, it does.” Anita assured. “I’ve located the crates. You have one that’s refrigerated. I assume those are meats?”

I nodded. “You assume correctly. I would have had them flown in, but import restrictions and…”

“I understand.” She actually smiled at me. “I apologize for the rude introduction. It’s been a stressful day.” She held her hand out.

I took it shaking it. “Understood.”

She nodded at Matt. “Welcome to Australia, Mr. Stryker.” And she left.

Matt grinned at me once we were alone. “This business partnership is going to work.”

I grinned as I locked the door again and came to him. “Yes, it will.”

Those next few days were busy! It’s a good thing we were young. I had a schedule to follow too. Those meals needed to be cooked. I talked to a farmer here the had the free range/hormone free chickens. I didn't want them frozen, they came refrigerated and it was easier to cook and healthier. Up before dawn most days and went to bed late. I had arranged my schedule for most things, including cooking, I precooked and finished on location. I had fish too. I got a little stove I could use out on location to finish cooking there. it was like a small camp stove I could run on a battery. I also had a cooler that ran on a battery, so I could keep my cool items cold. Like the smoothies I made. I even got a battery powered blender, with mixing cups the size of beer mugs. All I had to do was pre-make the smoothie, put them in a container and when I needed it, put the cup on the mixer and there you have it. We did put on a show for the others. Like when I would pass by and he was about to eat a donut. I took it out of his hand and handed him a muffin I’d made. I was an actor!

“Hey!” Matt grumbled as I snatched the donut away. "I was eating that!"

“You hired me to do a job.” I shot back. “I’m doing the job! That is nothing but fat and sugar. A sharp increase of energy, but also a quick decline as the sugar wears off.” I said angrily looking at him. “This muffin is healthy. It has wheat germ, apricots…it will fill you up and not weigh you down and give you the fuel you need to work!”

Matt grumbled as he bit into the muffin. Even angry he raised an eyebrow. “This is good.”

I nodded. “I know.”

I wasn’t supposed to, at least as the others were to believe, but I heard him say to one of the other crew. “It’s worse than traveling with Mom.” He munched again. “A mom that’s always right. The sad thing, it’s good.” He munched still a little annoyed. Mostly because I was right. He was an actor. I almost believed he was minorly annoyed but resolved because I was right.

On location, I brought what was needed for meals for him and cooked there. There was time to prepare while he worked. I had juices and water when they took a break or Matt was not in a scene. He talked to me then. It was fun, He and I didn't touch more than a friend would. But he had a tone we knew what was meant. Then when could touch we exploded with passion. Many times I took away a plate assembled for him and put another dish its place.

“What is that?” Felicia, the actress Matt was to act with, asked one day. They had broken for lunch.

Matt looked at it and shrugged. “I don’t know.”

“Balsamic Chicken, diced tomatoes, basil, rosemary…all fresh.” I replied sitting with my own plate. I made enough for both of us.

“That smells divine,” Felicia said, flirting with Matt. Who just grinned. “I thought you were all about healthfoods.”

I shook my head. “Why does no one understand? It’s not health foods, but healthy foods. Most meals can be healthy, it’s all how you prepare it and what it is. No preservatives, no artificial growth hormones…and fresh ingredients.”

“That’s why I hired him.” Matt smiled at me and a wink. “He’s a man of many talents.” He waggled an eyebrow and gave me a smile and quick look that said it all.

I knew he and Felicia were playing it up when together. They had to. For the scenes to work, they had to have a working friendship. And they did. Tom Cunningham was a bear. He was in his early forties and short tempered. On the third day of shooting, I had enough of his barking. It was plain to see the man was stressed and drank way too much coffee. Highstrung? You bet. On day four he was barking again when I walked up.

“Try this, Tom.” I held out a smoothie for him.

Startled, he looked at me. “Who are you?”

“I keep Matt Stryker sane and healthy. And you need something besides all that coffee. You’re getting the jitters. Try this, I swear it will work.” I handed him the smoothie.

He took it warily. “What’s in it?”

“Mint, avocado, coconut, ginseng. It has elements that will calm, yet keep you alert.” I watched him sip tentatively. “It will stop the barking.”

“This is good,” Tom commented surprised. “You’re Matt's assistant, right? And his nutritionist? How old are you?”

“I’ll be nineteen soon, but I’ve done this for a decade. It’s my family’s passion.” I smiled at him. “I have enough for two or three. You will need another in a couple of hours.”

And I did that the rest of the time we were there. By the end of the second week. He was almost mellow. Almost. He was still a stickler for the schedule. But a lot more bearable. Then came the nude scenes. They shoot things out of order. But this first scene was when she spies him in a waterhole giving himself a bath. The truth was, he wasn’t really naked. His ass was. He wore this little thing that covered his crotch. The little spaghetti string would be edited out. So when she confronts him, he comes up out of the water and walks over unashamed making her very nervous confronting this naked man who wasn’t concerned about his being naked in front of a beautiful woman. The love scene done later was the same way. Only it was dark and what little seen was his backside when he crawls into bed with her. It was like Matt said, it was all choreographed. Like a dance but not sexy at all. The uneasy feeling went away quickly for me. He was working. She was naked, too. But it was all about where he put his arm, how he held her and where the camera could get the best shot. Hardly romantic, and that why he was an actor. To make you believe it was romantic.

Now the biggest surprise I got was during the scene at the saloon, there was to be a fight. Matt against the bad guy. And there was always a bad guy or guys. Tom grumbled about there weren’t enough people to make it convincing. So, he had support staff come in as extras! I was told to get costumed and on the set. Me! In a movie!! I was going to be the guy at the piano! No speaking part, but when the fight began, I was to be in it. Fleeing the rowdiness. It was fun!

Matt and I collapsed into bed every night. I was exhausted. I knew he was. We had little time for anything extra. Two weeks and I was done with it wanting to go home, wherever that was going to be. So was Matt.

Say what you will, Tom Cunningham did as promised. On time and on budget. After the last scene was shot, they had a party to wrap things up. The beer flowed and it was party mayhem those last few hours. Felecia had been flirting for the past few days. Of course, scheduling was the problem Matt used not to take her up on her attempt to seduce him.

“I’m worried, Matt,” I said to him quietly. “Tell her if you want, but the more people who know the greater the chance it will leak out.”

Matt nodded. “It’s the risk I have to take. I don’t want to hurt her feelings.”

But it was that last night when she suggested they end it right and Matt just smiled at her. “That’s flattering, Felecia, but…”

She looked confused. “Don’t you like me? Was I reading too much into the chemistry we had?”

“We had chemistry, as friends.” Matt nodded. “I do like you, but I think I have to be honest…”

“There’s someone else, isn’t there?” Felecia asked confirming what she was feeling.

“Yes.” Matt grinned, but his eyes darted toward me and stayed a few seconds. “There is.”

Felecia followed Matt’s gaze and I just waved a little to her. “Oh?” Felecia asked, then instantly understood. “Oh, I see.”

Matt sighed. “You now know a secret I try so hard to keep. What you do with this information could hurt a lot of people. You’re one of the few I’d trust with this.”

She did look a little disappointed but smiled at the end. “At least it’s not for another woman.” She laughed. Then her face grew serious. “You just surprised me.”

“Why?” Matt asked.

She shrugged. “I just never suspected…you know.”

“I wanted to be honest with you Felecia,” Matt said pleading for her to understand. "Please keep this..."

“Sure. I understand. Thanks for the trust and vote of confidence. Not a word, Matt.:” She came to him and kissed him on the cheek and smiled at me then said sadly. “The one decent guy I meet.” Then she shrugged. “My loss.” She smiled and waved.

 

The flight back was long. We collapsed at Angel’s place and slept a day! The next day we got a place of our own on Venice Beach. Matt went to start filming the next season of Undercover Mob. And he was offered another part in a movie. Scarred! Basically, the movie was Undercover Mob with Matt being another character and the movie was putting more money in. Greater explosions and more elaborate scenery! He did the Cinderella movie that was renamed “Cinderfella.” It was for children as well as adults. He had good timing. He was great and funny as hell! And he did this all the while filming the series. He was that good. His career was taking off. Demands on his time were coming left and right. It was Christmas again before I saw my family. Our family.

 

“Things are really going well, I see,” Granddad said at the table as bowls of holiday dishes Grandma, Mom and I made were passed around.

I nodded. “It is.” I chuckled. “He’s been offered another part in a movie.”

“Really?” Grandma asked. “You are really popular on TV and now movies!”

"This year, he'll be a Klingon!!" I said happily.

Uncle Earl said immediately. "That's awesome!"

Matt nodded, "I even fight with Worf. Mostly I speak with Ricker and Pickard."

Uncle Earl was more excited about that then when he said he was going to do a movie.

Grandma frowned. "A what!" She smiled passing a steaming dish.

Matt chuckled. "He's an aggressive alien race on Star Trek...the new one." Matt waved at his face as he passed sweet potatoes. "They have these ridges on their forehead. They were enemies and allies. Very aggressive. Lot's of growling."

"He promised on the last day, he'd come home as a Klingon," I said a little excited. "He's seven feet tall in the episode."

Matt sighed. “Yes, but they want me to play this cop that’s about five to ten years older than I am. I don’t know if I can do it.”

“Of course you can, Matt,” I said again without hesitation. “You practically transform physically for every part you play.” I chuckled. "I was with Monroe for three weeks," I said. "He becomes another person so well I almost thought I was cheating on Matt!:

Matt nodded. “But I’ve never done this before. The age thing will be the tricky part.”

“Eric said you had nude scene in that last picture.” Mom grinned at Matt. “How much did you show?”

Matt blushed embarrassed. “Yeah, well….just my butt.”

“It was really nice the way they did it.” I nodded. “It was like Matt told me, it was a job.”

“You showed your ass?” Floyd asked stunned. “For the whole world to see!?”

Matt stood up. “Sure. Everyone’s got one. Here, I’ll show you.” He said it kidding, but was about to undo his belt as Mom and Grandma shielded their eyes.

“That isn’t necessary, Matt,” Grandma said chuckling. “I can see it just fine through your pants.”

Mary just huffed a bit bored at the idea of seeing it again. “Seen it.” She calmly served some pea casserole on her plate.

“I don’t know what the problem is, Dad.” I joked with Floyd. “You’ve got a nice ass. It’s just a shame that only Mom and I have seen it.”

That brought questioning looks from everyone at the table. Especially Granddad. “I had on boxers!” Floyd said quickly. “Boxers!” But he was blushing now. “I was getting coffee and he came down! Boxers!”

I chuckled. “But it made me see my principal differently that last year of school.” I waggled my eyebrows at Floyd who was scowling at me. It didn't bother me. I just smiled at him.

It was all good. We were all laughing. We were a real family now. And that included not only Matt but Floyd, too.

 

Mom made us promise to come to the wedding for her and Floyd in the spring. Then Matt and I had to go back to California.

Scarred was exciting. He was a man with scars, one right on his face. It went right over his left eye. But the movie was called Scarred by his scars were inside. But the song that played as bombs were blasting at his feet as he ran, Bonnie Tyler shouting that she was looking for a hero! Damn! He was sexy. I didn’t need convincing. Larger than life? He had to be fast and strong and I was swallowing it all. He was that hero. Sexy.

Matt came into the apartment and groaned. “That again?” He plopped down next to me.

I nodded loving that exciting man was sitting with me, and I got to love him. And not just the idea. “That again.” I put my arms around him. “I need a hero, too. And I got you.”

He chuckled. “Yeah, you do.” He leaned in kissing me passionately. “You’re my hero. I got you.”

I loved our time together. With his schedule and mine, we were lucky when we could find the time.

 

I took some classes at UCLA. But I couldn’t declare a major as I didn’t know what was going to happen with Matt. I was surprised when I got home from class to find a message on our machine. Matt said it was going to happen.

“Sorry, Matt. A woman called. She said she was your mother. I have the information, her number…if you want it.” His assistant said on the message.

His mother? I sighed. Putting my books on the table, I prepared a meal for him and me for when he got home. I didn’t know how he would take it. When he came in, he blew a tired breath and sat on the sofa.

“What a day!” He sighed sounding exhausted. “How was your day?”

“Fine. I learned about bolognaise.” I watched his face scrunch when I said that.

“What?”

I grinned at him. “Exactly.”

“What’s bolognaise?” He asked. “I think I know, but…”

“It’s a meat sauce from Italy. Ragu alla Bolognese, in Italian, to be precise.”

“Spaghetti sauce?”

“Sort of.” I walked over to him. “It’s called gravy in Italy. I learned about how it was done at first and the various kinds. Now, I’m gonna make it healthy.”

Matt chuckled as he reached up and pulled me down with him on the sofa. “I have no doubt you will.” He kissed me gently. “Hi, baby.”

I did love him intensely. “Hey.” I greeted. “And before you and I do…anything. There’s a message on the machine for you I think you should hear.”

He parted from me a little and frowned. “Why? Is it bad?”

I waved to the machine. “Just listen.”

Listening to the message, his face changed. “Damn.” He shook his head. “Damn, damn, damn.” He pointed at the machine. “I told you!”

I nodded, and it would have been funny, but his angry face told me he didn’t think it was funny at all. “You did. So, what now?”

He ran his hand over his head. “Find out what she wants, I guess.” He sighed.

“So, you’re going to call her back,” I said.

He came and sat down again. “I’ll have to.” He rested his head on his fists.

“Does it have to be bad?” I asked and he looked at me as if I were crazy. I held up my hands to stop his retort. “I don’t know her! Will it be that bad?”

“Yes.” He said adamantly and picked up the phone and dialed. He got the answering service. “Hey, Debbie. What’s the phone number for my mother?” Then he was shaking his head to a question I didn’t hear, but got. “Absolutely not. She never to be given my number or my address.” He listened some more writing a number down. He slammed the pen down. “Hear me.” He said firmly. “No one, and I mean no one is to give that woman or anyone the address where I live or what my number is. Understood?” He nodded. “Good.” He hung up and came around sitting again. His head fell back and he pushed his fists into his temples.

This was really bothering him. “Matt, you’re getting upset. Can I know why?”

He sighed again then he looked at me. “I wasn’t kidding. What I told you. My mother tried to kill me.”

“You mean as in end your life? Literally?” I questioned. “Not just some big trouble.”

“I mean she was chasing me with a knife! I mean bat shit crazy.” He said angrily. “My last time I saw her was chasing me with a long kitchen knife. One of those big ones.” He held his hands about a foot apart.

“Because she found you with a guy?” I asked in disbelief.

He nodded. “Because I was with a guy.” He looked at me and saw my amazement. “Yes.”

“What are you gonna do?”

“I don’t know!” He got up and began pacing. He looked out the great view at the beach. “What am I going to do?” He was asking no one really.

“Was she on medication?” I asked.

He nodded. “When she’d take it.” He was terrified. “She said it made her feel like she was working in a fog. She was mellow and almost depressed when she took it. Then she would stop taking them and have these episodes when she was nearly giddy and we did some crazy things. She’d pack my brother and me in the car and go to Disneyworld. She’d blow the whole check so there was no money for rent or groceries. Then there were the times when she was the other one. The angry, violent one. Like the one that chased me.”

As much as he shared with me over the years, this was never talked about. “That’s mental illness, Matt,” I said softly. “Your mother was sick.”

He turned on me, his look was pleading for me to understand. “She tried to kill me!”

I nodded and walked to him. “I hear you, Matt.” I took his face in my hands. “I absolutely believe you. Your Mom might be reaching out. You don’t know. Whatever you decide. I’m on your side. I made a promise to you and I mean it. You are the most important in my life now.”

He nodded and sighed. “I know.” He hugged me. “I’ll call.”

 

I sat nearby when he made the call.

“Hello, Mrs. Stryker.” Matt greeted coldly and didn’t sound at all like Matt. Distant and cold. He listened a moment. “It’s me, Mrs. Stryker. Matt, what do you want?” He listened a few moments again. “I don’t know, Ma’am. I’m glad you’ve gotten help.” He nodded again listening. “I don’t really want to see you.” He listened again. “The last memory I have of you was chasing me down with a butcher knife, that’s why!” He was listening again. “Leave me alone, Mrs. Stryker. I have a mother now. I don’t need you.” He hung up the phone. He glanced back at me. “She wants to see me.”

“I got that,” I said softly. “You made it clear you didn’t want to see her.”

He gave me a grim look as if I were to agree he shouldn’t. “You think I should?”

I got up. “Oh, no…..I will not be brought into this, Matt. You have to decide. I told you I am on your side. See her, don’t see her, ignore her. You make that decision. I have no opinion, I wasn’t there.”

He blew a breath and sat again. “A part of me wants to see her. She says she’s on the medications again. That she is better now and swears she will never go without them again.”

I wanted for him to continue, but when he didn’t, I asked. “But?”

“She’s said that before.” Matt lamented in frustration. The uncertainty in his mind was agonizing. “I want to believe her….I want to!”

“What do you think she’d do if she found out about me?”

He threw his hands out. “That’s the other thing! Was it the illness that made her do it, or was it genuine homophobia?” He pulled me in. “I’m with someone I love now. My life is making sense. But if people find out I’m gay…Look at what happened with Rock Hudson! They find out he’s gay and on top of that has AIDS! They panicked when he had that love scene with Linda Evans on Dynasty.” He shook his head. “If it comes out, my career is over.”

“But you don’t have AIDS.”

“The tabloids can say I do!” Matt said irritated.

I thought a while. “Then we have to do something.”

Matt’s eyebrow rose. “What?”

“One, we need to be tested,” I said sadly.

“We should.” Matt agreed. “I’ve had more partners than you…”

“It’s not for that, dummy. If you only had one and that person was HIV positive. We could die.” I said. “Two, you’ve got to get married.”

“What!?” Matt asked his face said he was astonished.

I began doing the Matt pace in a circle as I worked things out out-loud. “If you’re married, or going to be married, that will stop some of the gossip before it starts.”

“To who!?”

“I don’t know.” I shot back. “There has to be some actress out there that has as much to hide like you. For the same reasons.”

“A lesbian actress.” Matt clarified. He gave a consenting shrug. “I’m sure there is, but how do I find them? They aren’t going to advertise.”

I nodded. “No, but I can look.”

“You?”

“I can do it less obvious than you,” I stated the only way. “I’m invisible on sets. I can look and observe. I’ll find one. There are eyes on the set people don’t see.”

 

Looking was hard. The support staff did see things most overlooked. It’s just the way it is. I still delivered meals to Matt. I watched what he ate, geared his meals according to his schedule. I didn’t mention his mother. He was thinking about it but hadn’t decided. There was a lot at stake. No matter what, a child’s devotion to his mother is always going to be…difficult. I don’t know how I’d feel about my mother if she ever came at me with a butcher knife.

I was putting dinner on the table.

“I am going to see my mother.” Matt dug in his food.

I wanted to say something, but I wasn’t sure if I should or whether it would be helpful or hurt the situation more. Sitting next to him I would just assure him again. “I told you. I’m on your side.”

Matt just nodded, then looked up slightly with a grin. “I think if I decided something totally stupid, you’d be on my side.”

“Well, do you have to test that theory?” I grinned back. “I am devoted to you, Matt. I’ll always be on your side.”

He chuckled taking my hand. “I want you to go with me.”

“To visit your mother?” That made me nervous. “I don’t know a thing about her. Except that she threatened to kill you. If you want me there, I’ll be there.”

Matt just lowered his head chuckling but kissed the back of my hand. “You’re going to think I’m making it up, but when Mary said to go to the house to meet her parents and family. I knew, just knew that something momentous was about to happen.”

I smiled when I heard him say that. “Meeting Granddad and Grandma?”

He gave me a grin and shoved me back a little. “Meeting you, Numbnuts.” He chuckled. “And your grandparents, mother, and uncle. You were the first family I ever had since I left Charleston, West Virginia.”

I took his hand bringing it to my lips this time. “That family saw something good in you, Matt from the very first time they saw you. Just like I did.”

“I love you, Eric.”

 

He had to finish filming for Scarred. And Mom and Floyd’s wedding was coming up. We flew to Charleston, West Virginia. Having never been there I didn’t know what to expect, it was…not large. I mean, sure, I was from Charleston, South Carolina. It wasn’t large either, but bigger than this city. This was a river city. Mountains surrounded it. Charleston was at the center of the valley. And it was a city. No, nothing like Charleston, South Carolina and nothing at all like L.A. But I saw the charm. He took me through the outskirts, to a little house in a quiet neighborhood. We pulled up to a white house, wood that needed painting. The lawn was cut and the yard needed…something. I realized what was missing. There were no flowers or hedges. My family was huge with plants. We always planted flowers. It wasn’t a big house, in fact, it was sort of tiny.

“This is where you were raised?” I asked.

Matt nodded. “From the time I was nine.” He pointed to a building that wasn’t a school now, but it had been. “I went to Junior High there.”

I nodded. “Junior High? We had middle school.” I grinned at him. “Sixth through eighth grade.”

“Junior high, seventh through ninth,” Matt said a little haughty. He looked at the house and sighed. “I guess it’s now or never.” He got out. I let him lead the way, this was his domain in the past. Walking up the steps he rang the bell. I was expecting…well…a woman just short of deranged. But the woman that answered the door looked…normal. I could see where Matt got his hair color. She had grey in hers, but it was up in a very matronly fashion. My mother was in her late thirties, and Matt’s mother was apparently fifty but looked twenty years older than my Mom. Matt’s mother was plump. Not fat, but heavier than she could be. Heavier than even my grandma. The patterned shirt she had on was white with a blue design on it. Her face lit up when she saw Matt.

“Matthew, you came.” She smiled. “It’s good to see you.” Her eyes traveled to me. “Do I know you?”

I smiled feeling uneasy. “No.”

Matt stepped up between his mother and me. “If I tell you, will you try to kill me again?” There was a dare in his voice. He did tower over her.

She sighed sadly realizing what he was saying. “I was…not well.”

Matt nodded. “That’s an explanation, not an excuse.” Matt’s voice was angry but controlled.

I touched his arm gently. “Give her a chance.” I urged quietly.

“I was in a place…hearing voices and seeing images I couldn’t control or deal with. What I saw was a demon, not you. That was who I was going to kill.”

“That piece of information helps, but when being chased by someone who is screaming like a banshee. It didn’t help.” Matt said bitterly. “It still doesn’t.” Now it was hitting the fan. “I was your son!” He leveled a look at his mother. “Why did you call me? I was happy. My life was making sense, now…”

“You are my son!” She said, then she opened the door. “Can we discuss this like reasonable people? Inside?”

Matt was having problems excepting the invitation. “This is my boyfriend, Mrs. Stryker. Eric Richards.” Then he made another dare. “If you want to destroy me, you have the power now. Tell everyone.”

She held the door open. “Please, come in.”

The house, as I said was tiny. There was a living/dining room. A kitchen and what I assumed were doors to bedrooms. It was clean. We sat on the sofa.

“I am so sorry.” The woman said, and I heard the sincerity. “What I put you and your brother through…there is no excuse. I was drinking and not taking my medications….”

That’s when we heard a little boy. He came running in the room. He looked like maybe three or four. “Meme! Look!” He said waving the picture he had drawn.

“This is Dillon.” The woman introduced. “Your nephew. Mark’s son.”

Whatever Matt was expecting, this was not it. “Mark’s…”

“Dillon’s father made some mistakes. He’s doing time at Tygart. He’ll be out in a year.” His mother said sadly. “For embezzlement.”

Matt inhaled suddenly. “He embezzled money!?”

His mother nodded. “From his employer. He got five years. He’s trying to get released early for good behavior.” She then marveled at Dillon’s artwork. “That’s beautiful!”

The little boy looked a lot like Matt.

“Who’s his mother?” Matt asked.

“She hasn’t been in the picture for two years. She was with Mark when he committed the crime, but divorced as he was sentenced.” His mother replied. She got a determined look. “Son, I did some horrible things. I can’t tell you how sorry I am, but…I saw you on that TV show and knew you were okay. I didn’t know where you’d gotten to. I hoped we could be a family again.”

“I don’t know.” Matt almost whined. But I could see he wanted to believe her.

“I cannot undo what I did.” She continued. She looked at me. “I don’t understand how you can love a man, but…”

That made Matt’s temper flare. “Why do you think you have to? I didn’t ask your permission! You don’t have to understand.” He stood. “What’s to understand about a human being loving another human being? This is who I am. You want to be a part of my life. Start with accepting this is who I am. He’s part of that.” He pointed at me. Dillon was not happy with the yelling.

“Matt.” I cautioned softly. Matt looked at me questioning and I pointed to Dillon’s face which was getting upset. “Dillon.”

Matt forced himself to be calm. “You say it wasn’t your fault that you were sick. I say it was. You saw a demon instead of me because of what you just said. You can’t understand.” He vented. “Well, I don’t care. I told Eric you’d call. I expected you to ask for money, and I’m not convinced you won’t. If you want to be in my life. Start now.” He sat again. “I met his family. They told me day one, I was a part of that family. They didn’t care if I were gay or straight. They loved me. As a matter of fact, his mother saw we were in love and she was the one that pointed it out. She accepted me as a son!”

His mother held up her hands. “I am just not used to seeing it.”

“Well get used to it, Mrs. Stryker.” He got up and headed to the door. “We’re at the Holiday Inn downtown.” And he was gone. I just rose and followed quickly to the car. We rode a few miles before he spoke. I was just going to let him stew a while. “You haven’t said anything.” I looked as he was still fuming. “You need to calm down first.”

“I am calm!” He shot back angrily. Then sighed. “I know!” Then forced himself to calm down more. “I know.” He said softer. “I just keep seeing that crazy woman chasing me with the knife.”

“How old were you when that happened?” I asked.

“I had just turned sixteen.”

I nodded understanding more. “That’s still pretty young.” I shook my head. I looked out the window and saw we weren’t going to the hotel. “Are we going to visit Mark?”

“Yes.”

Matt was angry so I didn’t try to comfort him. Not yet.

Tygart was a small jail…prison…whatever. But not for your harden murderers or like that. Most of these men looked like they should be at work in an office. Convicted of non-violent crimes. The orange suits would be out of place in an office. We were taken to a visiting area. It was before visiting hours, but the guards loved Matt. Or rather, the loved Matt’s Undercover Mob character.

I was astounded when Mark came in. He had Matt’s face, only broader and his hair was almost blonde. Women made up crazy names for colors, I don’t know what’s between blonde and brown. Sandy colored hair? He was about five years older than Matt. He grinned at Matt as he sat down.

“The movie star arrives,” Mark said with the hint of a little jealousy.

“Knock it off, Mark,” Matt said quietly. “Or should I refer to you as the thief?”

His brother’s eyebrows rose but nodded. “Point taken. So, are you alright in Hollywood?”

“Venice Beach actually.” Matt corrected with a little smile. “How are you?”

Mark shrugged. “I’m the big brother of the star of a big TV show everyone loves. I’m very popular here.”

“I met Dillon.”

Mark’s callousness dropped. He sat forward a little. “How is he?”

Matt smiled. “He looks very happy. I sort of scared him when I confronted Mom.” It was the first time he’d referred to her as Mom.

Mark winced. “Pretty bad, huh?”

“I just can’t forget what she did.” Matt looked at his brother. “You were gone. I had no one with me.” Matt justified.

Mark looked very guilty. “I was only 20. What could I do? I could barely afford me. You did pretty well on your own.”

“I had to.” Matt defended.

Mark’s attention was now on me. “Who’s this? I assumed we could talk since he was here.”

Matt grinned at me. He looked back at his brother. “Did Mom ever tell you why she chased me with the knife?”

“No.”

Matt nodded. “You will have power over me when I tell you. I was with a guy.”

“Oh?” Mark asked, then his eyes came back to me. “Oh.” He got it. “So this is your boyfriend?”

“He’d be my husband if the law allowed. This is Eric Richards.” Matt said matter of fact.

“I see.” Mark nodded.

“Is that going to be important?” Matt asked to see if he’d made a mistake telling Mark.

His brother shrugged. “To me, no. But let’s keep it quiet. Otherwise, the guys here will want more than your autograph from me.” His eyebrows waggled and chuckled.

Matt laughed a little relieved. “Well, we do sort of look alike.”

“And the same shaped ass, or so I’m told.” Mark chuckled. He stood and extended his hand to me. “Pleased to meet you, Eric.”

I smiled back as we shook hands.

“So, you’re not going to tell anyone.” Matt pushed for an answer.

“Who needs to know who my brother fucks?” Mark grinned, then his eyes took on a mischievous shine. “Or does he fuck you?”

“No comment,” Matt replied relaxing more. “What are you going to do with Dillon?”

Mark frowned. “His mother couldn’t deal with all this…shit. She bailed about two years ago. Mom’s had him ever since.” He leaned forward. “She’s doing well. She got her five-year pin last month for five years sober. She had to take blood tests to see that she’s taking the medication needed. Court ordered her to comply to get custody of Dillon. But she could relapse, I don’t know about Schizophrenia.”

“Is that what the doctor’s say she has?” I asked having sort of diagnosed her with it before as his mother described what she’d see and heard, but I was no doctor.

“Schizophrenia and manic depressive disorder.” Mark quoted. “But she’s all he’s got.”

“She called me,” Matt said. “She wants to be in my life.”

Mark’s eyebrow rose again. “She did?”

“I could take him a little while. Until you get out.” Matt looked at me. “Of course I should ask you. You’ll be the one at home with him.”

I was stunned. Me? A kind of father to three year old!? I wasn’t prepared for this. "He is family, of course, we will take him if Mark agrees to allow his son to be raised by a couple of fags.” I punched Matt lightly in the arm. “Don’t put me on the spot like that.”

Matt grinned. “Sorry. But that has to be the real reason she called.”

“Agreed," I said. "But how will she feel if her grandson is being raised by us? How will Dillon feel? He knows her. He doesn’t know you except as the yelling man in his home. He never was introduced to me much less you. Hell, I don’t even know your Mom’s name!”

Mark and Matt chuckled. That was spooky, they almost laughed alike.

“It’s Iris,” Matt said.

“And Iris is sick,” Mark confessed slowly. “Cancer.”

That hit me hard. Another cancer victim. “Ouch. What stage?”

Mark’s face heard recognition in my voice. “You’ve dealt with this before.”

“His father died of cancer,” Matt answered.

Mark got a sympathetic look. “She’s in stage 3. It’s treatable, but it will be rough. She can’t keep up with an active three-year-old.”

I nodded. “What kind of cancer?”

“Esophageal,” Mark answered.

I shook my head. “It will be very difficult. The chemo and the radiation…” I thought. “Not to mention she will have difficulty eating. A feeding tube maybe.”

Mark looked at his brother curiously. “How old is he?”

“He’ll be 20 in October.” Matt grinned. “And he’s a damned good cook.”

Mark laughed. “I’d love to have some.”

“Can I bring it here?” I asked.

“Sure. Just let the guards know. Of course, you need to make them something, too.” Mark chuckled.

“I can do that.” I nodded. “What party are you?”

Mark looked surprised. “Party? You mean politically? Democrat.”

“Smart man.” I nodded.

“I was really kidding, not about the guards, though. Does that mean you will?” Mark asked getting excited at the idea.

“How do you feel about chili?” I asked.

“Love it!”

I nodded. “Ever had it with chicken?”

“Chicken!? But it’s hot?” Mark asked.

“I’ll bring sweatbands.”

Marked was laughing harder. “I like him!” He said to Matt. “Nice going, Matt!”

Whatever had happened between Matt and his mother. He was close to Mark. Why they drifted apart, I didn’t understand other than what Mark said about his age and they drifted apart because Matt left. They had been separated and lost the contact.

Then Matt turned, his face frowned. He swatted his brother’s head. “What were you thinking?” He shouted. “Getting arrested!?”

Mark looked embarrassed. And he should be! “It was stupid, I know.” He shrugged. “I thought I was being clever. That I was above the law. But I turned myself in.”

Matt sighed. “Yeah, we all do dumb things.” He sighed, then smiled. “Okay. I’ll help you all I can.

“Just take Dillon off Mom’s hands.” Mark pleaded.

I shook my head. “I just can’t believe he’s only three.” I sighed. “Okay, well, I’ll need a kitchen. You can get to know your nephew while I cook. Maybe get reconnected to your mother.” I suggested to Matt.

“You’re willing to do this?” Matt asked.

I rolled my eyes. “He’s family, Matt. Of course, we’ll do it. No question.” Then I looked at Mark. “You’re family now, too.”

Mark may have been a criminal, but my saying that made him smile. “Thanks.”

 

We did make arrangements with Iris to come over to her house. I would use her kitchen while Matt got to know Dillon. She still watched me, not sure if I knew what I was doing. When her uncertainty was gone she relaxed a bit. As I cooked, she ventured a few questions.

“Is my son happy?”

“He is,” I answered. “Can’t you tell?”

She sighed. “I’m afraid I don’t know my son.”

“That’s a shame,” I said sadly. “He is the kindest, most loving man I’ve ever met. He’s talented. Probably the most amazing human being I know.” I looked at her.

She looked at me doubtfully. “And you do love him?”

“Why is that hard to understand?”

She shrugged. “For a man to love a man, like that. I just don’t see it.”

“Why should you?” I asked. “We simply are...everywhere...in every country and we number in the hundreds of millions!.”

“And your parents didn’t care that you were queer?”

I frowned. “My parents don’t care.”

She still wasn’t giving it serious consideration. “It’s just not…natural.”

“It’s very natural.” I corrected. “It’s been around since the dawn of time. So, you’re saying you know the way things are to be. Based on what?”

“I’m just trying to understand.”

“It just is. Accept it.”

“I’m trying.”

I sighed getting annoyed. I sighed. She was a simple person, this might be more than she could accept. “Quit trying and just do it.” I looked at her. “We are everywhere. In every race and in every culture. It’s a big world. Try looking at it with open eyes. As it really is.”

She would never come around. How did Mark and Matt become who they were with her? Then again, their father had been alive during the early years, perhaps it was him.

I left some for Iris, if she wanted it. I got the chili to the Tygart and I made enough for Mark and all the guards on duty.

Mark took his first bite. “Whoa!!” He fanned his mouth inhaling quickly. “Hot, hot, hot!”

“Told ya.” Matt grinned taking a bite. He gave a nod. “It is hot.”

I chuckled. “Has to be fresh.” I stopped them from drinking to cool the fire. “Try these.” I presented a bowl of sopapias. And disk of butter. “These are sopapias, a kind biscuit. The butter is honey butter. It will take the sting from your mouths, not spread it around.” Looking at these two, I thought I should ask. “How is it that you two turned out like you have? The crime was one thing, but really, you are a decent guy. So is Matt. How did that happen?”

Mark smiled and thought. “Dad, I guess.” He said. “He never judged anyone else as being less than he was. Nor did he think anyone was better than he was. He thirsted for knowledge and read all he could. With only a high school diploma he read and he read.” Mark shook his head. “Mom never did.”

“Except for those trashy women’s novels.” Matt joked.

Mark laughed nodding. “She just never…I want Dillon away from her. I want him with you, Matt.”

Interesting. “Your mother seems nice.” I ventured.

“Is nice.” Mark agreed. “But simple. Dillon needs to get away from her and those people at her church.”

“What’s wrong with her church?”

Mark winced a little. “Well, I asked a man about the other versions of the Bible. He actually told me, since God’s word was the King James, if it was good enough for God...it was good enough for him..” He shook his head. “The man believed God spoke the King’s English.”

“No way.” I couldn’t believe that.

“Honestly,” Mark swore. “That’s just a sample of their weird beliefs. Right now, Dillon is young. A nice woman raising him is fine, but he needs to go to school and learn about the world.”

Matt nodded. “He will.”

 

We flew to the other Charleston. Then drove to Asheville with Floyd and Mom. Mom with Me and Matt rode with Floyd.

I told Mom about what happened.

“A nephew? Matt has a brother.”

I nodded as I drove. “Looks just like Matt. Well, he’s not as fit as Matt, but still, it was just like him. And Dillon. He could be Matt’s son, they look so much alike.”

She looked at me seriously. “How do you feel about that? Raising a child?”

I grinned at her. “The truth? Terrified.”

Mom chuckled. “I know the feeling.” She put her hand on my arm. “I was terrified when I had you.”

I was surprised. “You are a great mother.”

She laughed again. “And how many women have you known being your mother? I made mistakes like every mother does.”

“But I’ll be…what? Uncle?”

“You’ll be thousands of miles away.” Mom pointed out. “I won’t be there very often.”

I nodded. “Thanks. On my own.”

“You could move back. Live with Floyd and me.” Mom suggested.

That alarmed me. “That would mean I would leave Matt. No.” My mind raced on. “He just got to know Matt. He doesn’t know me at all. Raise him away from any family? No.”

“You’ll be fine.” She said with certainty. “When are you taking him?”

“Iris begins her cancer treatment soon. We’ll be flying back with Dillon Monday.”

“It’ll be fine. You’ll see.”

 

Floyd had ridden with Matt. They were going to Atlanta to catch a plane for the honeymoon. Thanks to Mom’s cooking, Floyd was a trimmed version of his usual self. Normally, he was the picture of calm and stern control. But he was far from that Marine now.

Granddad came in when the day came and we were getting dressed. He laughed as Floyd was making another pass as he paced. “You look as nervous as a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs, Floyd.”

We were all dressed in suits, except Floyd. He wore his uniform, which fit well. He looked at Granddad. “Because I am.”

I had to chuckle. “Mom’s not that scary.”

Floyd shook his head. “She can be.” He assured. “But…when I married before. Nelly was an only child and her mother was the only one alive when we married.” He looked up at us. “Now, I have…all of you.”

Earl stepped up. “Oh, I take it we’re the scary ones?” He chuckled.

Floyd shook his head again. “No, no…I just don’t want to mess up.”

“So, don’t,” Matt said simply. “You love Betty. I can see it.”

Floyd nodded. “I do, but…”

“We’ll go easy on ya.” I assured Floyd. “I promise.”

“You don’t think it’s a mistake, do you?” Granddad asked a little worried his future son-in-law was having cold feet.

“No!” Floyd answered quickly. “Hell no!”

“But it’s a big step.” Earl understood. “Because you’re marrying all of us.”

“I just want to be the best husband I can be.”

“Mr. Hiott.” I said softly. He turned as I used the name in respect for him as I always did when he was my principal. “You are a man of integrity. Just be her friend. From now on, she will be your best friend. Love her, yes, sure, but like her. That’s what she said to me. To be Matt’s best friend as well as a lover.”

Okay, he hugged me before, but now….it was slow and intense. “I loved your Dad. Ken was a friend. We parted after high school. I cannot and will not take his place. But I promise to be a good friend. To you and Matt.”

He was nervous alright. But he touched my heart. “I know you will. Just be good to Mom.”

“I swear.”

 

The wedding was out on this mountainside near the house with the view of the valley below. The weather was cool in the spring breeze, the mountains were as majestic as always. Mom was beautiful. Her dark hair was now a dark auburn. She wore a nice dress, but nothing like those fancy wedding dresses you see. She held a single tulip. The whole family was there. Aunt Mary was her maid of honor. Even Uncle Bob and Stan were there. Vows exchanged and promises made, they were married and I had a new step-dad.

“I wish we could do that.” Matt gripped.

I wasn’t really expecting that. He had said it once to his brother he would, but…he wanted to marry me!? “What?”

“I want to marry you, Eric,” Matt said softly. “Would you?”

“I would. Gladly.” I replied. “But why ask me? We can’t. It’s not legal.”

He frowned. “In this family!? You were at the wedding of your parents.” He chuckled. “Legal or not, I would marry you. Have little combinations of you and me running around would be awesome.” Just the way he said it was so sincere.

It touched a part of me I didn’t know I had. “I would love to have a little version of you and me. But until they can change how kids are made, we can’t.”

Matt grinned. “That doesn’t mean we can’t try.” He joked. “Seriously. On the West Coast, gay men are a dime a dozen. I see them everywhere, in the supermarkets, walking down the street holding hands and not ashamed of who or what they are. There are times I want to just say, fuck it and come out.”

I knew how he felt. There were so many times I just wanted to reach out and touch him when we were out. “But we can’t.”

Matt smiled, but there was no pleasure in it. “I know. Sometimes I wonder if my desire for a career is worth what we sacrifice.”

“You have a gift. You know as well as I do. Coming out now could cost you, meaning you can’t do what you love. I won’t let you do that.”

“Is that fair to you?” Matt asked.

“Do you love me?”

“You know I do,” Matt said defensively.

“And when home, you always come home. To me.” I said.

“Always.”

“Then it’s fair.” Kissing him tenderly.

My Muse was hitting hard between the eyes today. I think it's all right, meaning I proof read it and I didn't see any errors, but they could be there.
This is a world I see. If you've been there are see what I say isn't there, it's called an Artistic License. It's there if I say so. I hope you enjoy it.
Copyright © 2016 R. Eric; All Rights Reserved.
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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