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RIP - Comicality
    Tenebrae
  • Tenebrae
  • Author
  • 04/21/2011
  • 294 Words
  • 833 Views
  • 13 Comments
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 

Revelation's Visionary - 1. Revelation's Visionary

Revelation's Visionary

 

Drunk again and feeling no pain

Lust in your eyes and whiskey in your veins

You say it doesn’t mean anything, it was just a fling

That he reminded you of me and it was a sudden thing

 

I have no right to say it hurt,

Cause you aren’t mine

I have no right to feel left out,

Cause we're two of a kind

 

But I know ... I know ...

 

It's not me you've been holding tight

It's not me you were kissing last night

Though the odds were in your favor, the deck wasn’t stacked

You must have found something in him that I lacked

 

Because ... It's not me ... it never was me

 

I can't help but wonder if he held you like me

If he gave you something more that you need

Did he sound like me? Did his words come out right?

Was he able to please you in the ways that I can't?

 

I can't say the hurt that I feel

Can't bring you down from the high you achieved

Don’t want to make it such a big deal

No one else minds so why should I?

 

In the end … when all is said … it doesn't matter ...

 

If you're right, or if I'm wrong

Got to hold tight, got to stay strong

Have to stand my ground and face the facts

Can't let the world see more than this act

Because underneath the mask I wear

Is the part of me that can still care.

 

Erase the days that are done gone by

Take away what you have given

Leave me with this battered shell

And keep expecting me to live.

Copyright © 2011 Tenebrae; All Rights Reserved.
  • Like 7
Poetry posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you. 
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Chapter Comments

Lugh

we've all been there but I sure do like your description one hell of a lot better than mine would have been. write more.

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Tenebrae
On 04/22/2011 02:48 PM, Lugh said:
we've all been there but I sure do like your description one hell of a lot better than mine would have been. write more.
Thank you! I had to take a few hours to get the homicidal rage under control before I let what was left out into words, but doing this little piece helped deal with it easier. :-)
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Johnathan Colourfield

wow. just wow. That was beautiful in so many ways, it describes something alot of people go through in such vivid ways. Congratulations and for christ's sake write more! :D

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Jason Rimbaud

Haunting words from scars that are fresh and filled with anger and loss. Brilliantly written and filled with harsh imagery that forces you to see the harsh emotions that come with heartbreak, either your or from someone else. I likes

 

 

J

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Nephylim

I often find that when things hurt it helps to write.

 

I admire your courage in putting your pain out in the open for the vultures to feed on

 

I am no poetry expert I only know what I like and what I don't like. I'm not sure whether 'like' is the right word for how I feel about that poem... I mean WOW just WOW. It hits you like a brick between the eyes. You can FEEL the pain and anger and desolation. i'm truly sorry that it was written from the experience although it gives a realism to the words that brings them to life.

 

If that's your first then I can't wait for the rest. Awesome, powerful and beautiful piece

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Tenebrae
On 04/23/2011 01:06 AM, Johnathan Colourfield said:
wow. just wow. That was beautiful in so many ways, it describes something alot of people go through in such vivid ways. Congratulations and for christ's sake write more! :D
Thank you for taking the time to read and review it! I wasn't too sure about posting it but a friend of mine talked me into it.
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Tenebrae
On 04/23/2011 03:21 AM, Jason Rimbaud said:
Haunting words from scars that are fresh and filled with anger and loss. Brilliantly written and filled with harsh imagery that forces you to see the harsh emotions that come with heartbreak, either your or from someone else. I likes

 

 

J

Thank you! It was hard to write, but I felt better once it was all out. :-)
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Tenebrae
On 04/23/2011 06:13 AM, Marzipan said:
That hit me. Hard. With just few words a whole story in my mind.

 

The mind story is the hardest part for me to deal with. My imagination is vivid enough for me to fill in the details that didn't come with the confession.
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Tenebrae
On 04/23/2011 06:16 AM, Nephylim said:
I often find that when things hurt it helps to write.

 

I admire your courage in putting your pain out in the open for the vultures to feed on

 

I am no poetry expert I only know what I like and what I don't like. I'm not sure whether 'like' is the right word for how I feel about that poem... I mean WOW just WOW. It hits you like a brick between the eyes. You can FEEL the pain and anger and desolation. i'm truly sorry that it was written from the experience although it gives a realism to the words that brings them to life.

 

If that's your first then I can't wait for the rest. Awesome, powerful and beautiful piece

Thank you! A brick between the eyes is exactly how I felt when I found out. I'm glad I was able to convey my own feelings into the words for others to feel it, too.
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Tenebrae
On 04/26/2011 06:07 AM, Stargazer said:
Very emotional words for a very emotional situation. I'm glad you posted.
Thanks, Star. I was very nervous about it, but I'm glad it was liked so much.
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