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- 07/14/2015
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
Prompt Me This - 1. Prompt 430 - Blind Date
Prompt 430 - Creative
You hate blind dates and avoid them like the plague. Unfortunately, you didn’t find yourself a date for one of the most important events you company is holding. When your boss finds out, she says she has the perfect date for you. When you ask she simply says your date is “something special.” What is your blind date like?
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I was never a big fan of dating. Somehow, romance had become something of a bleak fantasy to me. Especially those surprises your friends arrange. I just never met expectations. Not even with online hook-ups. I offer all my stats up, becoming quite clear with my statistics, but the moment they see me, they have this grimace. I dress well enough, not a slouch in any sense. Simple, maybe, but by no means did I appear disgusting. But every one of those failed encounters just steered me further away from dating or even hooking up.
I worked for a blogging company, often did some research and did a sort of reblog all on its own. It was that or awaken the inner conspiracy theorist in me and write off coincidences as not so. It was a humor blog so no real harm done. As one can expect, our company was more casual and good-natured, so everyone was one day forced to go to a company event where they all had to bring dates, myself included.
Now, my lack of companionship wasn't a secret, but it was neither common knowledge. WHen my boss, Stacy, approached me about it, I confessed, and she looked so perplexed. "No date? Really? You get along with the guys pretty well, don't you?"
"Maybe it's something in the water," I drawled. "The people here have certain standards that apparently I don't meet." I relayed to her a few past dates who up and left at the sight of me. "Slender and glasses is apparently not appealing."
"Bullshit. Back in my high school, people like you had about as much chance as the jocks," she quipped.
"That was your high school, not this damned city," I snapped. "Look, just leave me out of the party. More drinks for you guys."
"And let you mope around in that depressing apartment? No way, man." She had a brief moment of silence before she looked like she sprung an idea. "I have an idea. I'll fix you up with someone I know. I'm sure you're his type. What's your type?"
"Three dicks and two vaginas," I jested. She smacked me lightly up the head. I laughed good-naturedly. "At this point, I don't care, Stacy. It's just to meet the party prerequisites."
"Trust me on this one, hooker. This guys is special."
I flipped her the bird as she called me that. "Don't call me hooker. I'm not your girlfriend."
"Nope, but you're my responsibility. Trust me on this; you'll love this guy. And if he gives you hell, I'll take care of it!"
I rolled my eyes. I highly doubted she would keep to her word. I wouldn't put my hopes up so much. I wasn't going to be deluded into believing again. "Do we get to meet before the party?"
"Nope. Let's make it a blind date." I groaned inwardly. "Hey, they aren't that bad."
"From my experience, that's a load of bullshit," I retorted. "I just hope he's pleasant. And aren't you super busy? The party's in a week."
"Just let me handle it, my young Padawan." She ruffled my hair and patted my head. I had to comb it back in place. "Just a few lines and he's in. He's sure to bite. And if you hit it off,I get to be the best lady in your wedding."
I smiled wryly. "Ah, your goal in life: main attraction to a gay wedding." She pinched my cheek at the snide remark. I jerked away, smiling. "That's a nasty pinch. Alright, you win. I'll play along, and play nice."
"That's the spirit!" she cheered. She went on her way, and I returned to work. I shook my head at her as I went back to work. I supposed it couldn't get worse. After all, if things wound up bad, I could always make her feel guilty about it.
I got a surprise on the weekend when she came to visit my apartment. She was my boss, but she was also a personal friend, so this kind of surprise visit was a bit uncalled for. I offered her refreshments but she brushed past me as she asked, "Where's your bedroom? We need to see your wardrobe."
"I can't afford a makeover," I quipped. "I'd rather invest in smaller, more vital things than clothes with an equal variant in the department store."
"I hope you invest in sexy underwear."
"Do you approve of boxer briefs?"
"As long as they hug your ass," she said as she scoured through my wardrobe with abandon. "You need sexier jeans, though. These do your ass no favors."
"Why the ass obsession?"
"Assets, darling," she answered matter-of-factly. "You have a pert butt and everyone at work knows it. A shame you're the only straight man there, which in itself is fucked up. You get oggled by some of our staff, you know. And you work out?"
"I just go run and work out in the park. Can't really afford a fancy gym membership." I stepped close behind her and watched as she inspected my wardrobe, going as far as feeling the texture. "I can't believe you're perusing my clothes like these. Come on, Stacy, this is too much."
"Humor me for a moment." She turned around with one of my tighter shirts. "Hm, this one definitely works. How come you never wore it to work before?"
"It's not exactly comfortable." I snatched the shirt out of her hands and hung it back inside the closet. "Look, I'm perfectly capable of dressing myself for a date. WHy don't you go home?"
"I just wanna make sure you hit second base that first night."
"I don't put out on the first date," I sang back. "And that's perfectly normal."
"Look, honey. As one of the less-campy of my gay friends list, I need you to shut up and let me take care of you. Look, why don't you come out with me and a friend of mine? He knows his budget fashion and I'm sure he can gear you up to make your blind date look twice at you. I can tell you his flavor and he'll handle the fit and budget. Do you trust me?"
"Should I be honest?" I dodged an incoming slug to the arm and sighed. "Fine, I'll come along. Might as well fit the clothes you'll force me to wear."
"Perfect!" she squealed. She ran to the hallway and yelled through the front door. "Allison, baby! We got the greenlight!"
I came out and saw her let in a man in tight clothes and a scarf. One key feature of his was that blond buzz cut. They squealed and jumped like teenage girls. What was the commotion about? I wasn't exactly on the stud list. She took the camp guy by hand and introduced him to me.
"Norton, this is my cousin Allison! Allie, this is my college buddy and company minion Norton."
"Enchante!" he greeted flamboyantly. I forced a smile and shook his hand. "Not butch, not camp. Kind of boring. Oh, darling. He'll be our greatest work yet!"
"As long as you don't feature me on a blog, we're good," I reprimanded them. "You guys are too excited about this."
"Oh, your date is a mutual acquaintance of ours," Allison drawled, with a hint of a devilish sneer that plotted evil in a split-second. "And it's been our long-time goal to fix him up. Despite your dull appearance, I'm sure he'll like you. But it never hurt to wrap a present in some fine wrapper. Know what I mean?"
"I think?"
"Good. Now let's go shopping! Tally-ho!"
I rolled my eyes as they marched out, muttering that there was definitely one ho.
I wasn't excited about spending money on new, fancy clothes, so I was relieved to see we were heading to a department store, one fo the nicer ones in the city, anyway. I perused some of the cheaper brands that looked and felt good. They kept dragging me to the fancier, more flamboyant ones, and I had to go into a debate with them on how less could be more and just the simplest accents could work. The store was new to me so I took my time. THey mostly commented on the fit of the shirts and trousers I fancied.
After about two hours of shopping, which took a toll on my feet, we came up with five shirts and three pants. We went out for lunch, Stacy's treat, and talked about the upcoming party,a nd how Allison managed to bag a date with one of my co-workers so he wouldn't miss his fine work. I was surprised it'd been one of the straight guys, Duncan.
"Duncan? How?"
"We go WAY back," he snickered, sipping on the straw of his iced coffee. "Norton, darling, you shouldn't worry too much. We aren't that serious. Going back, you can expect us to treat your date tot he same experience. I'm sure you won't be disappointed. Have some faith."
"Are you even sure this date you're setting up with me is gay? And after a relationship. I'm not one for one-night stands."
That was when Allison had an apprehensive look on his face and turned to Stacy, who merely shrugged. "My GOD, man. What kind of creature are you?"
"Um, someone bored of casual flings?"
"Well, our... common friend here is more than inclined to go into dating. I was hoping you could change that. SUppose I was wrong."
I smiled wryly and looked around us, seeing an absurd amount of couples. I could tell from their mannerisms, cuddling up to each other, feeding each other and holding hands. "What's with all the couples lately?"
"The universe aligned for primordial sex, darling."
"That sounds like an H.P. Lovecraft porno."
Allison laughed and slapped my hand. "Oh, hush! Silly boy."
I couldn't wait for the day to end. ANd when it did, and I was left in my apartment, I found some solace in the silence.
The date of the company party drew in fast. It was an evening event, and Stacy told me I'd meet my date at the entrance some time before the party started. So I waited outside, huddled in a jacket and wearing the tighter-fitting clothes Stacy and her cousin helped me pick out. I had to admit, trying them on before work made me feel a bit more confident about myself. They admittedly brought out my best features: my back and ass. Allison assured me I had a cute face, with or without glasses, so I took his word for it.
I thought to pass the time by reading some stories online. I was about thirty minutes in when someone called my attention. "Excuse me. Are you Norton?"
I looked up from my phone and saw I was overshadowed my a massive man. He was tall, broad-shouldered, and a little intimidating. He was a bear with massive arms and a chest that pulled his flannel shirt taut. His jeans hugged strong thighs, and I wondered where this lumberjack of a man came from. His hair was tied back in a low ponytail and his beard was trimmed close to his chin. Those icy blue eyes looked down at me and I felt my heart stutter. It took a while before it dawned on me who this was. "You're the date Stacy promised me?" I asked in a tone that was surprisingly levelled, even for me.
The man nodded and offered his hand. "Billy. I'm her brother."
"I don't remember her ever mentioning a brother." I shook his hand and stood up from my seat on the bench. "Now that I think about it, we hardly discussed family."
"Glad to know I have a clean slate to work with," he laughed, his voice rich and deep. "So you work for my sister? What's that like?"
"Half the time she drives me up the wall or into the looney-bin, but she's good with people and has quite the charisma."
"Yup, sounds like her." I looked down, only realizing he still held my hand, his thumb rubbing circles on it. "She told me about you. Said you had some bad luck around here."
"A little," I admitted. "She kept you secret, though."
"Makes me wanna ask what she had in mind."
I smiled and jerked my head to the entrance. "Shall we head inside and find out?"
"Sure, Norton."
The party was in full swing when we came in. The decorations would make the Valentine's Day parade jealous. The room was almost as big as the basketball court in my old high school, and there was an enormous pink, heart-shaped lantern hanging in the middle of the room. The buffet table was lined with a plethora of food. I looked to Billy and saw his eager grin. I couldn't help it. I might have been as hungry as he was.
On our way to the buffet table, we talked with whoever recognised me but only briefly. No one here seemed too familiar with Billy. I couldn't spy ALlison and Stacy anywhere, so we managed to reach the food without much distractions.
"God, they weren't kidding when they said I might feel out of place."
"Just work your charms and you'll fit right in," I assured him. Billy looked nervous, unsure of himself. "And no one will hold it against you if we thought to grab some food first. Do you wanna settle down somewhere?"
Billy looked around after he packed his plate to capacity. He pointed to a loveseat against the wall closest to the exit. "There looks good."
The funny thing when we sat down was that he pulled me onto his lap and fed me like we've been dating awhile now. What bothered me was how much I was enjoying myself. No one I dated before ever bothered to get this touchy-feely. It was nice to tell myself this moment would last and worry about incriminating circumstances later. It dawned on me how muscular and warm Billy was when I leaned back on him. Of course, Stacy had impeccable timing.
"Hey there, bro. Norton," she greeted us, a cocky look on her face as she held a man close to her side. He wasn't as butch as Billy but maybe just as tall. "Babe, this is my kid brother and his date."
"Nice to meet you, Billy," the tall blond said, offering his hand to me. I laughed as I leaned away and Billy took his hand, surprising Stacy's date. "Whoa, didn't think it was you!"
"You must be that rascal she keeps going on about. Chad, right?"
"Yup." Chad looked between us and grinned. "You guys seem to fit together, that much I can see. Are you two going to bail early?"
"Maybe," I answered, looking over my shoulder to Billy, who just shrugged. "Since my boss has finally seen me, I'm sure I can take an early leave." Stacy was giving me a shit-eating grin as they turned around and left.
"Should we go now, or do you wanna see Allie, too?" Billy asked me once they were a ways away. "I don't know about you but I think I'd like to get to know you some place quieter."
"I'm sure they can grill us in the morning. THey know where I live."
He cocked an eyebrow at me and smiled. "Us in the morning? Does that mean I can come over your place?"
The way he just smiled at me made me giddy all over. I nodded and gave him a peck on the nose. I was already on his lap; I figured this gesture he wouldn't mind. In fact, he blushed bright red! I got up and helped pull him out of the loveseat and led him back out. I didn't realize it then, but I think I did find someone special.
Maybe matchmaking wasn't so bad after all.
I'll be honest: no clue what the hell I wrote. Lemme know what you think so I can improve and blossom. Like a pitcher plant.
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Stories posted in this category are works of fiction. Names, places, characters, events, and incidents are created by the authors' imaginations or are used fictitiously. Any resemblances to actual persons (living or dead), organizations, companies, events, or locales are entirely coincidental.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
Note: While authors are asked to place warnings on their stories for some moderated content, everyone has different thresholds, and it is your responsibility as a reader to avoid stories or stop reading if something bothers you.
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