Well, I started out today thinking that I was doing just fine, I even talked to my Sweetie for a while and that was... SUPERB!! Then I went to work and there is a new guy there, Steve, since they closed 5 stores near mine, we have new employees... Anyway, he said, that I looked sad today... and I said nah, I'm fine... But then as I started to think about it more, I realized... I AM SAD

I am... it's true, and I know I am because I actually am drinking a root beer float right now. How does that prove anything?? Well, it just does... because I don't really like root beer. Maybe I think that when I'm sad or depressed that misery loves company and so if I'm already feeling miserable I might as well go for it all the way

On to the reason for the sadness... and I thought I was doing so well, I was proud of myself too! I thought that this morning I had made it through yesterday and I would be fine, but I guess not. It's nothing major... no need for total upheaval or anything, and no one can make it better so... It was my mom's birthday yesterday... It's been almost 8 years now since she died, and I am ususally fine, but the holidays come, and then her birthday, and then the day she died in February, then my dad died in March and his birthday is in April, so off and on for the next 4 :wacko: months I will be indulging in root beer floats it seems.

I'm fine, really, it's just... sad, there is no other way to say it than that. I have always been the strong one, the one to smile so everyone else will feel happy, and then I go and drink my root beer floats... sigh. I'm sure by tomorrow I'll be soooooo sick of root beer and happy again... in fact I'm smiling again so...

OMG!! Eric is alive, so YAY! I was beginning to worry. Okay, that's a lie... I was already worrying, unecesarilly I know, I was really beginning to worry A LOT!! Bard, I got your card, and I even waited for you to open it... but now your lost too and I am... worrying about you

Hugs, and I promise to be smilin' tomorrow,

Vivian