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Fae Briona

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SP spent the night last night, for the second time.  Slept in an odd position and my hip is killing me; his back is killing him.  That's most likely because neither of us is used to sleeping next to anyone anymore.  My allergies are bad and my blood pressure is sky high this morning and they were last time too.  This one I'm pretty sure is because he smokes -- and has for many many years -- and bringing that up is going to be difficult.  I'll probably have to tell him he'll need to go outside (he has been smoking outside) to smoke his last cig before bedtime earlier than he has been, so the smell of smoke is not as strong as when we get into bed.

Things are going well between us. I worry about messing things up by saying something, but on the other hand he'd hate to wake up to me having a heart attack.

Need to go into work and take care of things I wasn't able to get done this week from being out Wed. afternoon and almost all day on Thurs. due to joint pain but....  that will have to wait until the hip calms down enough for me to function.

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Mikiesboy

Posted

i think once we have been around for awhile, we all come to the table with 'stuff' and issues. All of us.  If we are mature we know this going in. Since SP has been smoking outside already, he doesn't need to be told to do it. Maybe just tell him you appreciate that he does.

Learning to live with other habits and 'things' requires patience and understanding. i know because my Husband puts up with me!

But it's worth it if you are happier with him, than without.  i wish happiness for you both!

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Fae Briona

Posted

23 hours ago, Mikiesboy said:

i think once we have been around for awhile, we all come to the table with 'stuff' and issues. All of us.  If we are mature we know this going in. Since SP has been smoking outside already, he doesn't need to be told to do it. Maybe just tell him you appreciate that he does.

Learning to live with other habits and 'things' requires patience and understanding. i know because my Husband puts up with me!

But it's worth it if you are happier with him, than without.  i wish happiness for you both!

Yep - at 50-ish I think we both have enough baggage for an international trip. However, we've both acknowledged that and have been talking through some of the larger issues.

I mentioned once that cig smoke was a trigger for my asthma and he had a rather abrupt, "It's a good thing I do it outside then" response; and he mentioned the 1st [and only] time he tried vaping it nearly gave him pneumonia -- and I don't think he was using any gray-market items or anything containing THC which have been the two big culprits  behind most of the lung issues associated w. vaping.  So it's not just that I don't like the smell, it's that it has a rather immediate and negative impact on my health. I'm not going to tell him to stop, but I do need to tell him that his last cig of the evening is going to have to be a bit earlier than just before we get into bed.

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Fae Briona

Posted

We had the conversation on smoking last night. I shouldn't have been worried - things went fine.  Need to remember that he isn't the bastard and isn't going to react the same way.

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