Relationships

[Conner]

From now on, though, compromises to me will be limited to things that really aren

[Razor]

I think this forum would provide a lot of help to everybody. I myself have found it helpful in changing my own outlook on the relationship i'm in. I'd like to thank everyone who has posted, its been very interesting to be able to see all of the different perspectives. However i do have one question, which again relates to the topic of alcoholism.

 

My boyfriend drinks alcohol, not a lot, and he's not been drunk since i've known him. However, i keep pestering him about his drinking, it worries me that he might one day become addicted and ruin both of our lives (although this is very far fetched.) He has done nothing to change his habits except reassure me that our future is safe and he will never allow it to get out of hand. So then i suppose my question is, should one person give up a luxury that they are used to for the sake of another persons paranoia?

 

 

This is touchy. My boyfriend won't take away my cigarettes, coffee, and random drugs (alcohol, whatever). I reserve the right to make my own choices about what happens to my body, and if they can't take that then they can leave. If I choose to give something up, I'll do it because I want to, not because my boyfriend told me to. That's just how I am and how I'll be.

[Krista]

I think this forum would provide a lot of help to everybody. I myself have found it helpful in changing my own outlook on the relationship i'm in. I'd like to thank everyone who has posted, its been very interesting to be able to see all of the different perspectives. However i do have one question, which again relates to the topic of alcoholism.

 

My boyfriend drinks alcohol, not a lot, and he's not been drunk since i've known him. However, i keep pestering him about his drinking, it worries me that he might one day become addicted and ruin both of our lives (although this is very far fetched.) He has done nothing to change his habits except reassure me that our future is safe and he will never allow it to get out of hand. So then i suppose my question is, should one person give up a luxury that they are used to for the sake of another persons paranoia?

 

 

 

No, a person should never have to give up something just to suit the person they are with at the time. It has to be the person's own accord. When people start shaping other people into what they want instead of remembering what attracted them in the first place problems start to arise. Alcohol is a more important thought though. I think every alcoholic has said, "I'll never let it get out of hand," and it has. It could be different, but right now, don't make it a problem if it isn't. It just seems like a warning sign that he's so strong willed with keeping alcohol in his life. As with any drug or alcohol it shouldn't be an every day crutch. If it is, then it's addiction.

 

Anyway, right now it doesn't seem like it's effecting your relationship on a social level other than your fears of it getting out of hand. That's normal and you have a right to worry about his alcohol consumption and his opinions on that.

 

Krista