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Mark Paren

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Everything posted by Mark Paren

  1. Mark Paren

    Chapter 4

    There might be a hint in the beginning of chapter 1.
  2. Simpler times. At least they seem so looking back. Thanks for the story.
  3. Mark Paren

    Chapter 2

    Interesting that you brought up ASD. I edited a section out about his instructors, Mr. Kitchens, consideration of John’s condition. It was a close call but I decided it might slow the pace of the story. It’s an important topic and I didn’t want to sell it short. That might have been a mistake. I’m not sure about the time lag. After the first few paragraphs everything should be contemporaneous. Ethan tells some stories but it is suppose to relate to the current (story) time period. Maybe I need to reread it with that in mind. Thanks for the comments.
  4. John was in his usual place. He looked uncomfortable. He wasn't fidgeting like the day before but wringing his hands. Ethan, picking up on John's distress, placed his backpack on the table and said, "I brought my stuff." The boy smiled. It was a genuine smile. Both Ethan and Mr. Kitchens smiled back. Ethan's smile evolved into a friendly laugh. Mr. K followed suit, and to their delight, John laughed for the very first time in his life. Meanwhile, the storm began to dissipate on th
  5. Mark Paren

    Chapter 3

    Just a guess, of course
  6. He battled on. Suddenly, a new character appeared in the game. A boy with penetrating blue-grey eyes was staring directly at Ethan as though he was peering into his very soul. Ethan was distracted, and the Sith Lord cleaved him at the waist with a sweeping lightsaber strike. He felt it, but it wasn't really painful. The game ended, and the room came back into focus. Ethan was thankful he wasn't hurt. The boy stood at the game room entrance, still staring at Ethan. Chapter 3 First Meeti
  7. Mark Paren

    Chapter 2

    That certainly is Mr. K's hope.
  8. Mark Paren

    Chapter 2

    Thanks for reading the story. The response to the second chapter is more encouraging then the first. I hope to publish a new chapter within the next two weeks. Appreciate the feedback on Ethan's parents. The creepiness wasn't intentional. I'll try to be more careful in the future developing the peripheral characters.
  9. Mark Paren

    Chapter 2

    Thank you for the review. It is really good to learn that you are enjoying the read.
  10. Mark Paren

    Chapter 1

    Thanks for the review. You definitely get it.
  11. The Party Ethan arrived a little late to the end-of-school party. His best friend Kobe was already comfortably moving with the flow of the party. There must have been fifty to eighty kids present. There seemed to be more boys than girls, but that made sense because it was Kobe's party, and most guys and girls were not dating seriously yet. Ethan and Kobe casually exchanged their personal hand checks. Kobe's dad, a huge LA Lakers fan, named him after Kobe Bryant. It was funny, but the n
  12. Mark Paren

    Chapter 1

    Thank you for the review. You have picked up on some the the themes of the story. In the next chapter John will be introduced to Ethan. Both John and Ethan will need to work through a few things. Thanks again.
  13. Preface "Once in every hundred years, they appear. Why they come and where they're from isn't clear, But they're here for our world." Howard Christman's Older (The Collectors, 1967) John is Born John Christman Anderson was conceived in the second decade of the 21st century. No one knew, but his conception occurred on a significant astronomical day. Three stars were perfectly aligned with a blue and a green planet in different galaxies. One of the stars was the Earth's su
  14. Ten thousand years ago, the first permanent human settlements were established soon after an unusual astronomical occurrence. The same phenomenon occurred again fourteen years ago. This story explores the impact of the meeting between a talented fifteen-year-old and a strange and exceptional boy.
  15. I am enjoying the story very much. The concept of waking up many years in the future opens up a lot fun and interesting areas to explore. Thanks for the entertaining prose.
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