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sandrewn

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  1. sandrewn

    MDBCs 19 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 444
    October 19th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Aaron (Coptic Orthodox Church of Alexandria) Aquilinus of Évreux Desiderius (Didier) of Auxerre Frideswide Henry Martyn (Anglican Communion) Isaac Jogues, Jean de Brébeuf, and Companions Blessed Jerzy Popiełuszko Paul of the Cross Ptolemaeus and Lucius Varus Veranus of Cavaillon William Carey (Episcopal Church) October 19 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Constitution Day, in honor of the country's independence (self-governing in free association with New Zealand) in 1974. (Niue) Oxfordshire Day  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    National New Friends Day
    Day of Unity
    Evaluate Your Life Day
    Geelong Cup Day
    Hagfish Day
    LGBT Center Awareness Day
    National BRA Day
    National Council Hill Day
    National Jared Day
    National Kentucky Day
    National Medical Assistants Day
    National Seafood Bisque Day
    Ride To Work Day
    Support Your Local Chamber of Commerce Day
    World Humanitarian Action Day
    World Pediatric Bone and Joint Da
    International Gin and Tonic Day
    Global Dignity Day
    Jon Favreau
    Peter Tosh’s Birthday
    Evander Holyfield’s Birthday
    Dorinda Clark-Cole’s Birthday
     
     
    ***
     
     
    I answered a 911 call at our emergency dispatch center from a woman who said her water broke.

    "Stay calm," I advised. "Now, how far apart are your contractions?"

    "No contractions," she said breathlessly. "But my basement is flooding fast."
     
    ***
     
    A motorist was driving down a rural dirt road when he came upon a stream. He called out to a man walking by, "Do you think I can drive my car through the stream?"

    "I suppose you can," said the man.

    So the driver started across, but within seconds, his car sank, and he barely escaped with his life.

    "You lied to me!" the driver screamed at the passerby. "That stream is at least ten feet deep!"

    "That's funny. It only reaches up to the middle of the ducks."
     
    ***
     
    Once there was a guy named Bill who wanted a horse. On Craigslist, Bill saw a Christian horse so he went to check it out. When Bill got to the ranch, the horse's owner said "It's easy to ride him. Just say 'praise the Lord' to make him go, and 'amen' to make him stop."
    Bill got on the horse and said "praise the Lord." the horse started to walk. "Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, praise the Lord" and the horse is running.
    Now Bill sees the cliff and says: "AMEN."
    The horse stops and Bill says: "Whew! Praise the lord!"
     
    ***
     
    None of my grandsons share my corny sense of humor. When the family is eating lasagna, I say, “Lean over your plate, boys. You’ll get 
less-on-ya.”
    I say to the ten-year-old, “Don’t yell through the screen; you’ll strain your voice.”
    And when I took another grandson to the zoo, I asked, “Do you know why that snake’s not pressed against the glass? He doesn’t want to be a windshield viper.”
    They’ll probably laugh later.
     
     
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    Here's a classic bar joke: a centaur walks into a bar, the bartender says, "Hey, how's the throat?"
    The centaur replies, "My throat isn't horse but my legs are."

     
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    sandrewn
     
  2. sandrewn

    MDBCs 18 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 443
    October 18th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Alaska Day (Alaska, United States) Christian feast day: Justus of Beauvais Luke the Evangelist Peter of Alcantara, can also be celebrated on October 19. October 18 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Independence Day (Azerbaijan), celebrates the independence of Azerbaijan from the Soviet Union in 1991. Necktie Day (Croatia) Persons Day (Canada) World Menopause Day  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    Flora Duffy Day
    Health Care Aide Day
    Kati Bihu
    National Ken Day
    National Louie Day
    National Mark Day
    National Mashed Potato Day
    National No Beard Day
    National Pharmacy Technician Day
    National Prayer Day
    National Speak Up for Victims of Sexual Abuse Day
    National Sunday Day
    National Zane Day
    Pro-Life Day of Silent Solidarity
    Simchat Torah
    World Menopause Day
    Developmental Language Disorder Awareness Day
    Patrick Bet-David’s Birthday
    Lindsey Vonn’s Birthday
    Jean-Claude Van Damme’s Birthday
    Dawn Wells’s Birthday
    Mike Ditka’s Birthday
    Tyler Posey’s Birthday
    Zac Efron’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
    Chocolate Cupcake Day
    October 18 is Chocolate Cupcake Day. Need we say anything more?

    A cupcake is a single serve cake which gets its name from the cup-like shaped mold it is baked in. An American invention, cupcakes use the same ingredients as a regular cake and can be decorated just like any other cake with icing, frosting, toppings and sprinkles.
    Beer Flavor
    While cupcakes come in a variety of flavors, chocolate is one of the most popular flavor available. Many people make their chocolate cupcakes special by adding gourmet ingredients such as coffee, pumpkin, beer and whiskey.
    In the 19th century, cookbooks referred to another type of cup cakes - cakes whose ingredients were measured by cups. This reference is no longer much in use.
    How to Celebrate?
    Here are some delicious ways to celebrate chocolate cupcakes:
    Eat one (or two, or several) chocolate cupcakes. Bake up a batch of chocolate cupcakes and share with family, friends and co-workers. Gourmet up your cupcakes. What about making bacon, Nutella or caramel chocolate cupcakes? Did You Know…
    …that cupcakes are known as fairy cakes in Britain and patty cakes in Australia.
       
    ***
     
     
    The Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest celebrates purposely awful opening sentences to imaginary novels. Here are the "best" from the past year.
    As Holmes, who had a nose for danger, quietly fingered the bloody knife and eyed the various body parts strewn along the dark, deserted highway, he placed his ear to the ground and, with his heart in his throat, silently mouthed to his companion, "Arm yourself, Watson, there is an evil hand a foot ahead."
    Through the verdant plains of North Umbria walked Waylon Ogglethorpe, and, as he walked, the clouds whispered his name, the birds of the air sang his praises, and the beasts of the fields from smallest to greatest said, "There goes the most noble among men"—in other words, a typical stroll for a schizophrenic ventriloquist with delusions of grandeur.
     
    ***
     
    Are you a redneck? Want to be one? Take the Redneck IQ test and see how well you fare. Don’t look for answers. If you need them, you’re no redneck.
    1) Which of these cars will rust out quickest when placed on blocks in your front yard? ’65 Ford Fairlane ’69 Chevrolet Chevelle ’64 Pontiac GTO
    2) Calculate the smallest limb diameter on a persimmon tree that will support a ten-pound possum.
    3) A woodcutter has a chain saw, which operates at 2700 rpm. The density of the pine trees in the plot to be harvested is 470 per acre. The plot is 2.3 acres in size. The average tree diameter is 14 inches. Here’s the question: How many Budweisers will be drunk before the trees are cut down?
    4) If your uncle builds a still that produces 20 gallons of shine per hour, how many car radiators are required to condense the product?
     
    ***
     
    Three guys are talking about what constitutes fame.
    The first guy defines it as being invited to the White House for a chat with the president.
    "Nah," says the second guy. "Real fame would be if the red phone rang when you were there, and the president wouldn't take the call."
    "You're both wrong," says the third. "Fame is when you're in the Oval Office and the red phone rings, the president answers it, listens for a second, and then says, "'It's for you.'"
     
    ***
     
    We were an Air Force family, but our son could not grasp that 
fact. Anytime someone asked what his father did, he’d say,
    “He’s in the Army.”
    I told him umpteen times, “Stop telling people I’m in the Army!”
    It finally seemed to hit home because on the admittance form 
for kindergarten, under “father’s 
profession,” the teacher wrote,
    “He doesn’t know what his father does, but he’s not in the Army.”
     
     
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    Sadly, Irene Triplett, age 90, passed away on May 31, 2020. She was
    the last surviving child of a Civil War veteran.
    R.I.P
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    W O W !!!!!!
     
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    Music Soothes the Savage Beast(s)
     
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    sandrewn
  3. sandrewn

    MDBCs 17 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 442
    October 17th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Andrew of Crete Anstrudis Catervus Ethelred and Ethelberht Florentius of Orange François-Isidore Gagelin (one of Vietnamese Martyrs) Hosea Ignatius of Antioch John the Short (John Colobus) Marguerite Marie Alacoque (pre-1969 calendar, Visitadines) Nothhelm Rule of Andrew Richard Gwyn Victor of Capua October 17 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) International Day for the Eradication of Poverty Loyalty Day (Argentina) National Police Day (Thailand)  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    National Pasta Day
    Black Poetry Day
    Child Poverty Day
    Day of Dignity (Bolivia)
    Day of the Races
    Dessalines Day
    Heroes and Forefathers Day
    National Catholic Men’s Conference Day
    National Edge Day
    National Heroes' Day of Jamaica
    National Mulligan Day
    National Pay Back a Friend Day
    Shemini Atzeret
    Women in Military Service for America Memorial Anniversary
    World Trauma Day
    Forgive an Ex Day
    Spreadsheet Day
    National Playing Card Collection Day
    Mae Jemison’s Birthday
    John Rocker’s Birthday
    Marsau Scott’s Birthday
    Chris Motionless’s Birthday
    Rich Evans’s Birthday
    Arthur Miller’s Birthday
    Angela Babicz’s Birthday
    Andy Whitfield’s Birthday
    Alan Jackson’s Birthday
    Norm MacDonald’s Birthday
    Dina Morisset’s Birthday
    Evel Knievel’s Birthday
    Rita Hayworth’s Birthday
    Jaeda Lily Miller’s Birthday
    Wyclef Jean’s Birthday
    Eminem’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances (2)
       Wear Something Gaudy  Day
    On October 17 is Wear Something Gaudy Day. Celebrate this unofficial holiday by wearing everything flashy, loud and gaudy in your wardrobe!

    It is believed that a Larry Dallas, a character in the American comedy show Three’s Company made up this bright and loud holiday. The show aired between 1977 and 1984 and follows the lives of three roommates in Santa Monica, California.
    The word gaudy is used to refer to things that are bright and flashy and usually tasteless and tacky.
    How to Celebrate?
    Wear something gaudy. Have a neon pink shirt? Pair it with bright neon green pants. Accessorize with more colorful jewelry and you are all set to celebrate this fun and colorful holiday. Own a bedazzler? Bedazzle your own outfit and shine throughout the day. Also plus point, if you bedazzled a sweater, you could reuse it on Ugly Sweater Day during the holidays. Did You Know…
    …that contrary to popular belief, the term gaudy does not come from the Spanish architect Antonio Gaudi? Etymologists have traced the usage of the word to the 16th century, well before Gaudi’s time. At that time, the word was used to refer trickery.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~
    National Clean Out Your Virtual Desktop Day
    Take the third Monday of October to clean the mess on your desktop because it is National Clean Your Virtual Desktop Day.

    Created by the Personal Computer Museum in Brantford, Ontario, Canada, the annual holiday was first celebrated in the around the world in 2010. The unofficial holiday encourages people to organize their desktop and the files on their computer.
    Find Your Files
    Just like in real life, it is very easy to collect useless and unimportant files on our computers and desktops. And just like when we are surrounded by clutter, we tend to get unproductive, a mess on our computer desktops can negatively affect our motivation and ability to work well. In addition, a cluttered desktop can not only slow down our computer, but it can also make finding files more difficult.
    This holiday promotes cleaning up and organizing your desktop so that when you work on your computer you are not bogged down by all the unnecessary and unimportant files.
    National Clean Your Virtual Desktop Day is also sometimes known as Clean Your Virtual Desktop Day.
    How to Celebrate?
    Start off the week right by cleaning out your desktop. Organize all your folders and reclaim that picture of a sunny beach as your screensaver. Did You Know...
    ...that the early computers were the size of a room? That's a far cry from the tiny computers we are all familiar with today!
     
     
    ***
     
     
    After i-messaging back and forth with my wife, I jokingly commanded Siri to pass along this message: “You need to get back to work now; you have a husband to support.”
    Here’s what Siri sent: “You need 
to get back to work now; you have 
a has-been to support.”
     
    ***
     
    I gave my father $100 and said, “Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.”
    So he went out and bought a present for my mother.
     
    ***
     
    My sister decided to go on a diet, and that first evening she phoned me. I could tell her mouth was full, so I asked her what she was eating.
    "A cupcake," she mumbled. "I just got on the scale, and it read 149 1/2 pounds. I decided that was no place to start a diet, so I'm rounding it off to 150."
     
    ***
     
    My mother was away all weekend at a business conference. During a break, she decided to call home collect. My six-year-old brother picked up the phone and heard a stranger's voice say, "We have a Marcia on the line. Will you accept the charges?"

    Frantic, he dropped the receiver and came charging outside screaming, "Dad! They've got Mom! And they want money!"
     
    ***
     
    I tried to explain to a client why I couldn’t help him with a project that was written in a program code that I didn’t know.
    “Let’s say you’re asking me to write something in a specific language. Now, I’m fluent in English and Spanish, but your project is in Chinese. Since 
I don’t understand Chinese, I’m not your best option. You need someone who is fluent in this specific language. See?”
    He said he did and thanked me.
    The next morning, I got a call from another developer asking,
    “Why is 
So-and-So asking us if we’re fluent 
in Chinese?”
     
     
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    sandrewn
     
  4. sandrewn

    MDBCs 16 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 441
    October 16th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Air Force Day (Bulgaria) Boss's Day (United States) Christian feast day: Balderic (Baudry) of Monfaucon Bercharius Bertrand of Comminges Colmán of Kilroot (Colman mac Cathbaid) Eliphius Fortunatus of Casei Gall Gerard Majella Hedwig of Silesia Hugh Latimer (Anglicanism) Junian (of Saint-Junien) Marguerite Marie Alacoque Marie-Marguerite d'Youville Nicholas Ridley (Anglicanism) Silvanus of Ahun Blessed Thevarparampil Kunjachan (Syro-Malabar Catholic Church / Catholic Church) Pope Victor III October 16 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Pope John Paul II Day (Poland) Death anniversary of Liaquat Ali Khan (Pakistan) Teachers' Day (Chile) World Food Day (International) Bu-Ma Democratic Protests Commemoration Day (South Korea)  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    National Feral Cat Day
    Ethnicity day
    Global Cat Day
    National Department Store Day
    National Eddie Day
    National Elaine Day
    National Liqueur Day
    National Trey Day
    National Veterans BBQ Day
    Sunday School Teacher Appreciation Day
    World Allergy Awareness Day
    World Spine Day
    World Toy Camera Day
    Steve Jobs Day
    Oscar Wilde’s Birthday
    Angela Lansbury’s Birthday
    Suzanne Somers’s Birthday
    Manute Bol’s Birthday
    Naomi Osaka’s Birthday
    Hema Malini’s Birthday
    Flea’s Birthday
    Bob Weir’s Birthday
    John Mayer’s Birthday
    Tom Schwartz’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
    Dictionary  Day
    Dictionary Day is on October 16. The unofficial holiday celebrates the birth anniversary of American lexicographer, Noah Webster.

    Born on October 16, 1758, Webster is best known for publishing An American Dictionary of the English Language, the precursor of the now famous and widely used Merriam-Webster Dictionary.
    Reference Book
    A dictionary is a reference book that lists words in a language and provides the meaning, origin and pronunciation of each listed word. The book also informs users on how to use a word in different circumstances.
    Semasiological, of Course
    Dictionaries are semasiological. Semasiology is the branch of linguistics that deals with the definition of words and phrases in a language. This is different from onomasiology, which deals with what things and concepts are called. A thesuarus is an onomasiological reference book because it provides users the different terms that can be used to express a specific idea.
    How to Celebrate?
    Pick up a dictionary and try to learn the meanings of at least 5 new words. Learn more about the history and science behind publishing dictionaries. Did You Know...
    ...that pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis is the longest word in the Merriam-Webster dictionary? At 45 letters, the word refers to a lung disease.
     
    ***
     
     
    Choosing a movie? Don’t trust these extremely abbreviated plot 
explanations. 
    The Shining: A family’s first Airbnb experience goes very wrong.
    The Lord of the Rings: Group spends nine hours returning jewelry.  
    Titanic: Everyone tries the ice-bucket challenge.    
    Beauty and the Beast: Stockholm syndrome works.     
    The Chronicles of Narnia: Kid comes out of the closet. 
     
    ***
     
    I’m employed at a computer security company and have a colleague whose name is,
    M. Alware. His e-mail address is malware@company.com. 
    My ex-boss’s name is R. Stone. His e-mail was stoner@company.co.in. 
    My name is James Pan. Every other permutation of my name was taken (e.g., jpan, jamesp), so I’m stuck with japan@university.edu.
     
    ***
     
    The attorney tells the accused, “I have some good news and some bad news.”
    “What’s the bad news?” asks the accused.
    “The bad news is, your blood 
is all over the crime scene, and the DNA tests prove you did it.”
    “What’s the good news?”
    “Your cholesterol is 130.”
     
    ***
     
    I’ve given up social media for the New Year and am trying to make friends outside Facebook while 
applying the same principles. Every day, I walk down the street and tell passersby what I’ve eaten, how I feel, what I did the night before, and what I will do tomorrow. Then I give them pictures of my family, my dog, and me gardening. I also listen to their conversations and tell them I love them.
    And it works. I already have three people following me—two 
police officers and a psychiatrist.
     
    ***
     
    The annual Bulwer-Lytton Fiction Contest honors purposely lousy opening sentences for nonexistent novels.
    This entry from finalist Phillip Davies of Cardiff, Wales, gave us a very real laugh:
    “Finally, after 97 long days adrift, Captain Pertwee was 
rescued, mercifully ending his miserable diet of rainwater and strips of sun-dried Haddock—which was 
actually far ghastlier than it sounded, what with George Haddock being 
his former first mate.”
     
     
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    nice couple
     
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    Meanwhile, back at Walmart
     
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    sandrewn
  5. sandrewn

    MDBCs 15 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 440
    October 15th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Anniversary of the 1987 Coup d'État (Burkina Faso) Breast Health Day (Europe) Christian feast day: Bruno of Querfurt Cúan of Ahascragh Teresa of Ávila Thecla of Kitzingen October 15 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Evacuation Day (Tunisia) King Father's Commemoration Day (Cambodia) National Latino AIDS Awareness Day (United States) Shwmae Su'mae Day (Wales)  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    National Fetch Day
    Bridge Day
    Global Handwashing Day
    Hoshana Rabbah
    International African Penguin Awareness Day
    International Day of Rural Women
    International: Dussehra
    Mother's Day in Malawi
    National Aesthetician Day
    National Cheese Curd Day
    National Costume Swap Day
    National Grouch Day
    National HSA Awareness Day
    National Lemon Bar Day
    National Motorcycle Ride Day
    National Mushroom Day
    National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day
    National Riley Day
    National Roast Pheasant Day
    Shine a Light Night
    Universal Music Day
    White Cane Safety Day
    World Students’ Day
    International Sloth Day
    National Chicken Cacciatore Day
    International Repair Day
    Adventure Day
    Friedrich Nietzsche’s Birthday
    Abdul Kalam’s Birthday
    Billy Unger’s Birthday
    Anthony Joshua’s Birthday
    Jarrod Schulz’s Birthday
    Keyshia Cole’s Birthday
    Ginuwine’s Birthday
    Zelo’s Birthday
    Mesut Özil’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances (2)
    I Love Lucy  Day
    October 15 is I Love Lucy Day, a day devoted to everything I Love Lucy, a black-and-white sitcom that aired in the 1950s in the United States.

    One of the most watched television series of its time, the show is well known and popular around the world today. The unofficial holiday commemorates the day in 1951, when the show, starring real-life couple at that time, Lucille Ball and Desi Arnaz, debuted on CBS.
    Singer and Performer
    I Love Lucy follows the lives of aspiring performer Lucy Ricardo, her singer husband Ricky Ricardo and their friends Ethel and Fred Mertz in New York City.
    While the show ended in 1957, a spinoff first known as the Lucille Ball-Desi Arnaz Show and then as The Lucy–Desi Comedy Hour ran for three more years.
    How to Celebrate?
    Have an I Love Lucy-themed party and have guests dress up in 1950s style. Decorate your venue with 1950s style furniture and textiles and serve foods that were popular in the 1950s. Organize a marathon viewing session of the show with your friends and family. Did You Know…
    …that I Love Lucy is the only show in television history that has never stopped broadcasting since airing its first episode in 1951? Reruns of the show have been popular around the world after the show ended.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Sweetest Day
    The third Saturday in October is celebrated as Sweetest Day in parts of the United States.

    The unofficial holiday was started in 1921 in Cleveland, Ohio as a way to encourage women to treat their male romantic partners with sweets and candy.
    Boosting Business
    It is thought that the holiday, which is now popular in parts of Northeastern and Midwestern United States, began as a way for confectioners to boost their business. On the first Sweetest Day, on October 10, 1921, a committee of 12 candy makers distributed sweets and candy to orphans and senior citizens and encouraged people to do the same.
    Older Origins
    The idea for having a special day to promote candy consumption actually came about a few years before. In 1916, the National Confectioner's Association invented a day called Candy Day to be celebrated on the second Saturday of October. Unfortunately, the First World War overshadowed any such celebrations and the day failed to take off.
    Valentine's Day for Women
    Over the years, Sweetest Day has become a romantic holiday, where women are encouraged to buy candy and show romantic gestures towards their male partners. Many people consider the day as the reverse of Valentine's Day, where historically men have been expected to do romantic things for their female partners.
    10 States
    Sweetest Day is not a nation-wide holiday—only people in a handful of cities, including Buffalo, New York; Detroit, Michigan; and Cleveland, Ohio celebrate the holiday.
    How to Celebrate?
    With candy, of course! And remember, you do not have to have a significant other to share or give candy to. You can also treat yourself or your friend to some of their favorite candy. Make candy from scratch at home and share with your co-workers, family, and neighbors. Learn the history behind your favorite candy and sweets. Did You Know…
    …that Halloween, one of the most important holidays for candy companies, was not a big candy holiday until the mid-1950s?
     
     
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    As a freelance secretary, I type story manuscripts. When an author pays me, I print the name of the story across the top of his check. Once when I took a check to the bank, the teller suddenly froze. Only after I had explained my procedure to a bank officer did the reason for the teller's reaction become clear.
    The story was called "Your Money or Your Life," and that, of course, was what I had written in bold letters across the top of the check.
     
    ***
     
    During a business trip to Boeing's Everett, Wash., factory, I noticed several 747 and 777 airliners being assembled. Before the engines were installed, huge weights were hung from the wings to keep the planes balanced. The solid-steel weights were bright yellow and marked "14,000 lbs." But what I found particularly interesting was some stenciling I discovered on the side of each weight.
    Imprinted there was the warning: "Remove before flight."  
     
    ***
     
    Louie and his wife are listening to the radio when they hear the weather report: "A snow emergency has been declared. You must park your cars on the odd-numbered side of the street.” So Louie gets up and moves his car.

    Two days later—same thing. "A snow emergency has been declared,” blares the radio. "Park your cars on the even-numbered side of the street.” Louie gets up and does what he’s told.

    Three days later: "There will be a foot of snow today. Park your cars on the ...,” and then the power goes out.

    "What should I do?” a confused Louie asks his wife.

    "This time,” she says, "why don’t you just leave the car in the garage?”
     
    ***
     
    Ah, marriage. I was standing in front of the bathroom mirror one evening admiring my reflection, when I posed this question to my wife of 30 years:
    “Will you still love me when I’m old, fat, and balding?”
    She answered,
    “I do.”
     
     
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    sandrewn
  6. sandrewn

    MDBCs 14 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 439
    October 14th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Angadrisma Fortunatus of Todi Joseph Schereschewsky (Episcopal Church (USA)) Pope Callixtus I October 14 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Intercession of the Theotokos Day of the Cathedral of the Living Pillar (Georgian Orthodox Church) Mother's Day (Belarus) National Education Day (Poland), formerly Teachers' Day Nyerere Day (Tanzania) Second Revolution Day (Yemen) World Standards Day (International) Defender of Ukraine Day (Ukraine)  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    National Dessert Day
    Be Bald and Be Free Day
    National I Love You Day
    National Ryan Day
    National Veronica Day
    Vet Nurse Day
    World Egg Day
    World Standards Day
    National Boss’ Day
    Dwight D. Eisenhower’s Birthday
    Kamala Harris's Birthday
    Stephen A. Smith’s Birthday
    Usher’s Birthday
    Roger Moore’s Birthday
    Rowan Blanchard’s Birthday
    Lourdes Ciccone Leon’s Birthday
    Karyn White’s Birthday
    King James II’s Birthday
    Jason Plato’s Birthday
    Jared Goff’s Birthday
     
     
    ***
     
     
    Just because the items in these classified ads are free doesn’t mean they’re worth it:
    Free: Piano with matching bench seat, very good condition, all keys work probably
    Free: 5 kitchen drawers, all matching naughty pine fronts
    Free: Vain Screening
    Free: rent in exchange for elderly woman
     
    ***
     
    We all make mistakes. Some 
are just more public than others, 
like these real newspaper typos:
    “Here the bridal couple stood, 
facing the floral setting, and exchanged cows.”
    “It took many rabbits many years to write the Talmud.” 
    “Mrs. ____ fell down stairs at her home this morning, breaking her myhodudududududududosy, and suffered painful injuries.” 
    “A headline in an item in the 
Feb. 15th edition incorrectly stated ‘Stolen Groceries.’ It should have read: ‘Homicide.’” 
     
    ***
     
    It’s tough enough selling a home nowadays. Don’t make the mistakes that turned off these readers on the City Room blog of The New York Times:
    "It was a good house, well-maintained. But the bed with the person in it was off-putting."
    "The family dog, long departed, was stuffed and standing next to the fireplace. RIP Sparky."
    "The main distraction was dirt. Although there was the tiny child who proudly showed us the refrigerator full of ‘Daddy’s beer’ just outside an upstairs bedroom."
     
    ***
     
    A long line leading to the ladies’ room greeted my friend’s wife. Since desperate times call for desperate measures, my friend took her 
into the empty men’s room, then stood guard.
    When she exited a few minutes later, a man waiting his turn called out,
    “I hope you remembered to put up the toilet seat.”
     
     
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    Parking sensors
     
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    Taking your kid to go shopping at Walmart
     
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    Texas?
     
    ***
     

    Free Ranging chickens (three catches per customer max)
     
    ***
     

    Leprechaun cowboy???????
     
    ***
     

    Attention, pickup in isle 14!!!!!!!
     
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    sandrewn
  7. sandrewn

    MDBCs 13 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 438
    October 13th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Azerbaijani Railway Day (Azerbaijan) Christian feast day: Blessed Alexandrina of Balasar Daniel and companions, of Ceuta Edward the Confessor (translation) Gerald of Aurillac Blessed Maddalena Panattieri (OP) Theophilus of Antioch October 13 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Doi taikomatsuri October 13–15 (Shikokuchūō, Ehime, Japan) International Day for Natural Disaster Reduction (international) Paramedics' Day (Poland) Rwagasore Day (Burundi)  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    National No Bra Day
    Disaster Day
    English Language Day
    International Civility For the Girl Child Day
    International Day for Disaster Reduction
    International Day for Disaster Risk Reduction
    International Day for Failure
    Karva Chauth
    Metastatic Breast Cancer Awareness Day
    National Herpes Awareness Day
    National M&M Day
    National Train Your Brain Day
    National Transfer Money to Your Son Day
    National Yorkshire Pudding Day
    Navy Birthday
    World Sight Day
    World Thrombosis Day
    Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s Birthday
    Paul Pierce’s Birthday
    Paul Simon’s Birthday
    Margaret Thatcher’s Birthday
    Marie Osmond’s Birthday
    Ashanti’s Birthday
    Layla Spring’s Birthday
    Kate Walsh’s Birthday
    Jerry Rice’s Birthday
    Jimin’s Birthday
    Jerry Jones’s Birthday
    Caleb McLaughlin’s Birthday
    Sammy Hagar’s Birthday
    Shirley Caesar’s Birthday
    Tisha Campbell-Martin’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
       International Skeptics  Day
    Are you one of those people who takes everything they hear with a grain of salt? Do you question everything and never accept things at their face value? Then, International Skeptics Day on October 13 is the holiday for you.

    This unofficial holiday is sometimes also celebrated on January 13. Or is it?
    Whether you are skeptical of when the holiday is celebrated or not, we can all agree that the day encourages people to be skeptical and to never accept anything without questioning its veracity.
    Attitude of Doubt
    According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, skepticism is an attitude of doubt towards a particular object or a piece of knowledge, whether it is philosophical, religious or scientific. It is only with this attitude that human society and its understanding of the world around it has been able to evolve and develop - many scientific claims, myths and hoaxes throughout history have been brought to light and debunked due to the hard work of skeptics who refused to stop questioning and doubting. Who knows, without Galileo Galilei's skepticism, for example, we may still be believing that the Sun moves around the Earth?
    How to Celebrate?
    Be skeptical (or sceptical if you live in a country that follows British English) of everything! Don't accept any claims made by family, friends, colleagues or strangers without doing your own research. Is there a mystery that intrigues you? Try solving it! Know of someone who believes in UFOs, the Loch Ness Monster or the Big Foot? Maybe it's time to sit with them and ask them to be skeptical about their claims? Watch TV shows that debunk myths and pseudoscience. We recommend Penn and Teller's show and Mythbusters. Read books written by literary skeptics such as Shakespeare and Herman Melville. Did You Know...
    ...that the opposite of skepticism is trivialism, the notion that everything is true and possible? The word comes from the Latin word, trivialis, meaning commonplace.
     
     
    ***
     
     
    A poodle and a collie were walking down the street. The poodle turned to the collie and complained, "My life is a mess. My owner is mean, my girlfriend is having an affair with a German shepherd, and I'm nervous as a cat."
    "Why don't you go see a psychiatrist?" asked the collie.
    "I can't," replied the poodle. "I'm not allowed on the couch."
     
    ***
     
    Two campers are hiking in the woods when one is bitten on the rear end by a rattlesnake.
    "I'll go into town for a doctor," the other says. He runs ten miles to a small town and finds the only doctor delivering a baby.
    "I can't leave," the doctor says. "But here's what to do. Take a knife, cut a little X where the bite is, suck out the poison and spit it on the ground."
    The guy runs back to his friend, who is in agony. "What did the doctor say?" the victim cries.
    "He says you're gonna die."
     
    ***
     
    A pair of cows were talking in the field.
    One says, "Have you heard about the mad cow disease that's going around?"
    "Yeah," the other cow says. "Makes me glad I'm a penguin."
     
    ***
     
    Texting acronyms can stump even the best parents:
    Mom: Your great-aunt just passed away. LOL.
    Son: Why is that funny?
    Mom: It’s not funny, David! What do you mean?
    Son: Mom, LOL means Laughing Out Loud.
    Mom: I thought it meant Lots of Love. I have to call everyone back.
    ~~~~
    Daughter: I got an A in Chemistry.
    Mom: WTF!
    Daughter: Mom, what do you think WTF means?
    Mom: Well That’s Fantastic.
    ~~~~
    Mom: What do IDK, LY & TTYL mean?
    Son: I don’t know, love you, talk to you later.
    Mom: OK, I will ask your sister.
     
     
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      sandrewn
  8. sandrewn

    MDBCs 12 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 437
    October 12th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Blessed Louis Brisson Edith Cavell and Elizabeth Fry (Church of England) Fiacc Our Lady of the Pillar (Fiestas del Pilar) Our Lady of Aparecida Radim Gaudentius (Czech Republic) Seraphin of Montegranaro Wilfrid of Ripon Carlo Acutis October 12 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Children's Day (Brazil) Discovery of America by Columbus-related observances (see also October 8😞 Columbus Day (Honduras) Día de la Hispanidad or Fiesta Nacional de España, also Armed Forces Day (Spain) Día de la Raza (El Salvador, Uruguay) Día de la Resistencia Indígena, "Day of Indigenous Resistance" (Venezuela) Día de las Américas (Belize) Día de las Culturas, "Day of the Cultures" (Costa Rica) Día del Respeto a la Diversidad Cultural, "Day of respect for cultural diversity" (Argentina) Discovery Day (The Bahamas, Colombia) Feast for Life of Aleister Crowley, celebrated as "Crowleymas" (Thelema) Fiesta Nacional de España (Spain) Freethought Day Independence Day (Equatorial Guinea), celebrates the independence of Equatorial Guinea from Spain in 1968. International Day Against DRM  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    National Pet Obesity Day
    Emergency Nurses Day
    International Top Spinning Day
    Mexico: Day of the Pluricultural Nation
    National Bring Your Teddy Bear to School Day
    National Curves Day
    National Fossil Day
    National Gumbo Day
    National Martin Day
    National Pulled Pork Day
    National Savings Day
    National Stop Bullying Day
    National Take Your Parents To Lunch Day
    National Vermont Day
    Spain Hispanic Day
    Uruguay Day of Cultural Diversity/Day of the Races
    World Arthritis Day
    Aleister Crowley’s Birthday
    Darci Lynne Farmer’s Birthday
    Dick Gregory’s Birthday
    Hugh Jackman’s Birthday
    Josh Hutcherson’s Birthday
    Kirk Cameron’s Birthday
    Kelvin Dukes’s Birthday
    Lane Frost’s Birthday
    Tahlia Christou’s Birthday
    Tokyo Toni’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
       Old Farmers  Day
    October 12 is Old Farmers Day, a day devoted to old farmers and their farming techniques.

    Agriculture and farming today is largely mechanized and very scientific, but these developments would not have been possible without the wisdom and hard work of old farmers. This day is to give them thanks, to listen to them and to their stories, and to learn from them and their techniques.
    While the origins of the holiday are unknown, Old Farmers Day is celebrated by many as a throwback to sustainable and farm-to-table farming practices of the old days.
    Varied Culture and History
    Farming and agriculture have a long and varied history in every culture. Despite the differences on what is grown, how farming is done and what materials are used, one thing remains common to all agricultural societies - the farmer. Farmers are the lifeline of agriculture - they tend to the agricultural product from the time of sowing to the time it reaches the market. It is because of hardworking farmers around the world, that most of us have food on our tables every day.
    How to Celebrate?
    Learn about old farming techniques. If you own a farm, farm today using old farmers tools. If you have an old farmer in your life, take them out for lunch and listen to their stories and ask for their wisdom. Not a farmer? That shouldn't stop you from celebrating this fun holiday. Visit your local farmer's market and patronize your local farms. Buy only locally grown food and locally raised meat. Get involved in your local farm-to-table movement. Did You Know...
    ...that according to scientists, almost 40% of the Earth's land is used for agricultural purposes?
     
     
    ***
     
     
    When a fellow piano tuner was ill, I took over his assignment of tuning a piano in a girls' boardinghouse. While I was at work, several of the girls strolled casually through the room in various states of undress. The climax came when a young lady in startling deshabille appeared to pay the bill.
    As I was writing the receipt, she suddenly gave me a bewildered look, then fled, screaming, "That's not our regular man!"
    Their regular man is blind.  
     
    ***
     
    A panda walks into a bar, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the bartender shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for the food."
    The panda yells back, "Hey, man, I'm a panda. Look it up!"
    The bartender opens his dictionary to panda: "A tree-climbing mammal of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."
     
    ***
     
    Six guys are playing poker. After losing $500 on one hand, Smith clutches his chest and topples over, dead at the table. To decide who's going to tell his wife, his buddies draw straws. Anderson picks the short one.
    "Break it to her gently," they all urge.
    "Leave it to me," he says. When Smith's wife comes to the door, Anderson says, "Your husband just lost $500 playing cards."
    "How much?" the wife yells, eyes blazing. "Tell him to drop dead!"
     
    ***
     
    Two men have been ice fishing 
all day. One has had no luck, while the other has pulled out a ton of fish.
    “What’s your secret?” asks the 
unlucky fisherman.
    “Mmmmm mmm mm mmm mmmm mmm mmm,” is the reply.
    “I’m sorry; what did you say?”
    “Mmmmm mmm mm mmm.”
    “I still didn’t understand you.”
    The lucky fisherman spits something into his hand and says slowly and clearly, “You’ve got to keep your worms warm.”
     
     
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    Shades of " Romeo and Juliet "
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    sandrewn
  9. sandrewn

    MDBCs 11 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 436
    October 11th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast days: Agilbert Alexander Sauli Andronicus, Probus, and Tarachus (Roman Catholic Church) Æthelburh of Barking Bruno the Great Cainnech of Aghaboe Gratus of Oloron Gummarus James the Deacon (Church of England, Roman Catholic Church, Eastern Orthodox Church) Lommán of Trim Maria Soledad Torres y Acosta Nectarius of Constantinople Nicasius, Quirinus, Scubiculus, and Pientia Philip the Evangelist Pope John XXIII (Roman Catholic Church) Zenaida and Philonella October 11 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) General Pulaski Memorial Day (United States) International Day of the Girl Child National Coming Out Day Revolution Day (North Macedonia)  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    National Sausage Pizza Day
    Black Girl Day Off
    Lao: Boat Racing Festival
    NATIONAL FACE YOUR FEARS DAY
    National Kimberly Day
    National Peyronie’s Disease Awareness Day
    National Spread Joy Day
    Southern Food Heritage Day
    Own Business Day
    Cardi B’s Birthday
    Luke Perry’s Birthday
    Matt Bomer’s Birthday
    Steve Young’s Birthday
    Daryl Hall’s Birthday
    Brandon Flynn’s Birthday
    Frank Fritz’s Birthday
    MC Lyte’s Birthday
    Amitabh Bachchan’s Birthday
    Gabe Saporta’s Birthday
    Hayley Erbert’s Birthday
    Younan Nowzaradan’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances (2)
       It's My Party  Day
    October 11 is It’s My Party Day, a great excuse to have a party for no reason at all! All you need to do is to invite all your friends and family to a fun party!

    While the origins of this unofficial holiday are unknown, it is safe to say that it encourages people throwing a party to celebrate themselves.
    How to Celebrate?
    While one never needs a reason to have a party, It’s My Party Day is a great justification for throwing a bash just because you can! Here are some ways you can celebrate this fun holiday:
    Have a party of course! Send out invitations, decorate the venue, make all your favorite party foods, put on some fun music and let the party begin! Too tired to organize a party by yourself? What about meeting your friends at a restaurant or at the park? Who says parties have to be at home? Did You Know...
    ...that according to the Guinness Book of World Records the longest dance party lasted for 55 hours? The party took place in Wexford, Ireland on October 29, 2006.
     
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Ada Lovelace Day
    Ada Lovelace Day is celebrated annually on the second Tuesday of October.

    Named after Ada Lovelace, the world’s first computer programmer, the day not only commemorates the lives of women in the field of science, technology, engineering and math (STEM), but also encourages girls and young women to enter careers in these fields.
    Any Date in October
    Ada Lovelace Day began in 2009 after an extensive online campaign in the United Kingdom. About 2000 people blogged about women in sciences and technology on March 24, 2009, a practice that has since become an Ada Lovelace Day tradition. There is no fixed date for Ada Lovelace Day. According to the organizers of the day, the choice of the date for the day is arbitrary.
    Analytical Engine
    Ada Lovelace was an English mathematician who worked with Charles Babbage on his calculating engine, called the Analytical Engine. Her plan to calculate Bernoulli numbers using the engine is now widely considered as the world's first computer program.
    In 1980, the United States Department of Defense created a programming language and named it Ada in honor of Ada Lovelace's contribution to the world of computing.
    How to Celebrate
    Honor the women in your life who are in the STEM fields. Encourage the young girls in your life to pursue one of the STEM fields as a career. Buy the young girls in your life science kits, building games and books that make them interested in science. Read more about women scientists and their contribution to the world. Did You Know…
    …that Mary Shaw became the first woman to get a Ph.D. in Computer Science from Carnegie Mellon University in 1972?
     
     
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    The 16th tee featured a fairway that ran along a road. The first golfer in a foursome teed off and hooked the ball. It soared over the fence and bounced onto the street, where it hit the tire of a moving bus and ricocheted back onto the fairway.
    As they all stood in amazement, one of the golfer's friends asked, "How did you do that?"
    The golfer shrugged. "You have to know the bus schedule."
     
    ***
     
    Old accountants never die, they just lose their balance. Old musicians never die, they just get played out. Old lawyers never die, they just lose their appeal. Old daredevils never die, they just get discouraged. Walt Disney didn't die. He's in suspended animation.  
    ***
     
    Psychiatry students were in their Emotional Extremes class. "Let's set some parameters," the professor said.
    "What's the opposite of joy?" he asked one student.
    "Sadness," he replied.
    "The opposite of depression?" he asked another student.
    "Elation," he replied.
    "The opposite of woe?" the prof asked a young woman from Texas.
    The Texan replied, "Sir, I believe that would be giddyup."
     
    ***
     
    I’m at the library, and for some reason, when I plug my flash drive into the computer, it doesn’t show up. I keep trying, but nothing happens.
    As an IT major, I know I can figure this out. So I spend 15 minutes changing settings and inserting and removing the flash drive.
    Then a girl sitting next to me taps my shoulder and says,
    “You’re plugging into my computer, not yours.”
     
     
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    sandrewn
  10. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 10 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 435
    October 10th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Arbor Day (Poland) Army Day (Sri Lanka) Capital Liberation Day (Vietnam) Christian feast day: Blessed Angela Truszkowska Cerbonius Daniel Comboni Eulampius and Eulampia Gereon and companions Blessed María Catalina Irigoyen Echegaray (Maria Desposorios) Paulinus of York (in England) Pinytus Tanca Vida Dutton Scudder (Episcopal Church) Viktor of Xanten October 10 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Constitution Day (Sint Maarten) Curaçao Day, anniversary of autonomy Double Ten Day (The National Day of Republic of China), celebrates outbreak of the Wuchang Uprising in 1911 that led to founding of the Republic of China in 1912 Fiji Day, celebrates the independence of Fiji from United Kingdom in 1970 Finnish Literature Day (Finland) Independence Day, commemorates the proclamation of Cuba's independence from Spain and the beginning of the Ten Years' War in 1868. Party Foundation Day (North Korea) World Day Against the Death Penalty World Mental Health Day World Porridge Day  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    Canadian Thanksgiving
    Columbus Day
    SHIFT10 Day
    World Homeless Day
    Bonza Bottler Day
    Health and Sports Day (Japan)
    Huduma Day
    Indigenous Peoples' Day
    International Stage Management Day
    International: Day of respect for cultural diversity
    Lao: End of Buddhist Lent Day
    Local Government Day
    Lotu a Tamaiti Holiday
    Maroons Day
    National Angel Food Cake Day
    National Cake Decorating Day
    National Heritage Day in Turks and Caicos
    National Heroes' Day of Bahamas
    National Hug a Drummer Day
    National Hug a Kevin Day
    National Kick Butt Day
    National Native American Day
    National Online Bank Day
    National Porter Day
    World Animal Road Accident Awareness Day
    World Inclusion Day
    World Plant-based Burger Day
    Rekha’s Birthday
    Mya’s Birthday
    Marjorie Harvey’s Birthday
    Brett Favre’s Birthday
    Mario Lopez’s Birthday
    David Lee Roth’s Birthday
    Lzzy Hale’s Birthday
    Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s Birthday
    Dan Stevens’s Birthday
    Da'Vinchi’s Birthday
    Tanya Tucker’s Birthday
    Marina Diamandis’s Birthday
    Thelonious Monk’s Birthday
    Bae Suzy’s Birthday
    Gavin Newsom
     
    Fun Observances
       Handbag  Day
    Handbag Day is celebrated annually on October 10.
                            
    Created in 2013 by Purseblog, a blog that follows the fashion and handbag industry, Handbag Day recognizes the importance of handbags in daily life and in fashion, and acknowledges that a handbag is not only an essential item in a person’s closet, but is also a simple way to make a style statement.
    The unofficial holiday encourages people to share pictures of their handbags and show their love for this fashion accessory on social media websites.
    How to Celebrate?
    Go out and get that high-end handbag you have been eyeing the whole year. Is your handbag a place where things go in to get lost? Perhaps today is the time to clean it out and organize it. Did You Know…
    …that in the early 1900s, handbag was a term used to refer to men's hand baggage?
     
     
    ***
     
     
    My sister Darlene has the courage—but not always the skills—to tackle any home-repair project. For example, in her garage are pieces of a lawn mower she once tried to fix. So I wasn't surprised the day my other sister, Jesse, and I found Darlene attacking her vacuum cleaner with a screwdriver. "I can't get this thing to cooperate," she explained.
    "Why don't you drag it out to the garage and show it the lawn mower?" Jesse suggested.  
     
    ***
     
    After a long career of being blasted into a net, the human cannonball was tired. He told the circus owner he was going to retire.
    "But you can't!" protested the boss. "Where am I going to find another man of your caliber?"
     
    ***
     
    A guy walks into a bar and there's a horse serving drinks. The horse asks, "What are you staring at? Haven't you ever seen a horse tending bar before?"
    The guy says, "It's not that. I just never thought the parrot would sell the place."
     
    ***
     
    I was cuddling with my girlfriend, and she said, “I love lying here with you.”
    “I once caught a fish, and it was five feet long and spoke Hebrew,” I replied. She stared at me, confused. “That was my lie,” I said.
    “Oh, right. I see. Very funny,” she said. She paused a moment before rolling over. “That was my lie.”
     
     
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    sandrewn
  11. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 09 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 434
    October 9th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Abraham Denis Dionysius the Areopagite Ghislain Innocencio of Mary Immaculate and Martyrs of Asturias John Henry Newman John Leonardi Luis Beltran Robert Grosseteste (Church of England) Wilfred Grenfell (Episcopal Church (USA)) October 9 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Fire Prevention Day (Canada, United States) Hangul Day (South Korea) Independence Day, celebrates the independence of Uganda from United Kingdom in 1962. (Uganda) Independence of Guayaquil from Spain in 1820 (Ecuador) Leif Erikson Day (United States, Iceland and Norway) National Day of Commemorating the Holocaust (Romania) National Nanotechnology Day (United States) Takayama Autumn Festival (Takayama, Japan) World Post Day Indian Foreign Service Day  
    Observances (click on the day/week for details)
    National C60 Day
    Sukkot
    World Post Day
    International Beer and Pizza Day
    National Digitool Day
    National Moldy Cheese Day
    National Pro-Life Cupcake Day
    Pastor Appreciation Day
    Saint Barthélemy: Abolition Day
    Valmiki Jayanti
    Vap Full Moon Poya
    White Sunday
    World Hospice and Palliative Care Day
    Scrubs Day
    Zachery Ty Bryan’s Birthday
    Sean Lennon’s Birthday
    Sharon Osbourne’s Birthday
    Lecrae Moore’s Birthday
    Scotty McCreery’s Birthday
    John Lennon’s Birthday
    Jackson Browne’s Birthday
    Eddie Guerrero’s Birthday
    Bella Hadid’s Birthday
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Fire Prevention Week
    Sun Oct 9th, 2022 - Sat Oct 15th, 2022
     
    Fun Observances
    Curious Events Day Love conspiracy theories? Enjoy pondering about bizarre events that seem to have no explanations? Then Curious Events Day, a made-up holiday celebrated every year on October 9, is just the holiday you need to celebrate!

    While the origins of this curious holiday are unknown, we suspect that the creators of this day wanted people to stop worrying about the small things in life and focus their attention on all the inexplicable, baffling and peculiar mysteries of the world.
    Small or Big Events
    Life is full of curious events - big and small. Like for example, where do all those socks disappear to after doing laundry, or why do people open their mouths when applying mascara? Some mysteries have occupied curious and adventurous minds around the world. These include: Who made the stonehenge and for what purpose? Does Bigfoot exist and can ghosts communicate with humans? And then there are the bigger, more philosophical mysteries of life - like what happens when we die or what is what is beyond the edge of the universe?
    How to Celebrate?
    No matter what kind of curious events interest you, Curious Events Day is a holiday to spend some time being inquisitive about the world around you.
    Read or watch documentaries about some of the more famous curious incidents and events that have happened in the history of humankind – disappearances in the Bermuda Triangle, sightings of the Yeti and the Loch Ness monster, crop circles, UFO sightings in Roswell. Become a sleuth yourself and try to find explanations of curious events that intrigue you. Did You Know...
    ...that the English language idiom curiosity killed the cat, means that getting curious and prying into other people's affairs can get one into trouble?
     
     
    ***
     
     
    Q: What’s the technical name for a pot of coffee at work?
    A: Break fluid
    ***
    Q: If you call a large turkey a gobbler what do you call a small one?
    A: Goblet.
    ***
    When a Butterball Talk-Line staffer asked a caller what state her turkey was in (meaning how thawed was it) the caller responded with, “Florida.”
    ***
    A gentleman called Butterball's Thanksgiving Turkey Talk-Line to tell the operator he cut his turkey in half with a chain saw and wanted to know if the oil from the chain would adversely affect the turkey.
    ***
    One caller to Butterball's Thanksgiving Turkey Talk-Line had always cut the legs off the turkey before putting it in the oven, thinking that was how you had to cook a turkey. She later learned that the only reason her mom had been doing that was because their oven had been so small that that was the only way to get the bird into the oven!
     
    ***
     
    After my three-year-old begged and begged, I gave in and 
let her attend a concert with her older sister and brother. As we 
took our seats, I handed programs 
to the kids.
    Following the lead of her siblings, my three-year-old opened her program and announced,
    “I’ll have the chicken.”
     
     
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    sandrewn
  12. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 08 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 433
    October 8th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Evodus (or Yves) Palatias and Laurentia Pelagia (Eastern Orthodox and Roman Catholic Churches) Reparata San Ernesto, Che Guevara as a folk saint. (Bolivian campesinos) Simeon (Gospel of Luke) Thaïs William Dwight Porter Bliss and Richard T. Ely (Episcopal Church) October 8 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) World Space Week (October 4–10) Air Force Day (India) Arbor Day (Namibia) Children's Day (Iran) Navy Day (Peru)  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    Alvin C. York Day
    American Touch Tag Day
    Battle of Angamos
    Egypt: Al-Mouled Al-Nabawy
    Honduras: Discovery of America Day
    I Love Yarn Day
    Indian Air Force Day
    International Birth Registration Day
    International Newspaper Carrier Day
    Milad an-Nabi (Mawlid)
    Myanmar Full Moon of Thadingyut
    National Chess Day
    National Fluffernutter Day
    National Harbormaster Appreciation Day
    National Heroes’ Day
    National Justin Day
    National Lance Day
    National Salmon Day
    Prophet Muhammad’s birthday
    World Octopus Day
    Universal Music Day
    International Podiatry Day
    International African Penguin Awareness Day
    Bella Thorne
    Bruno Mars
    Matt Damon
    Nick Cannon
    Jesse Jackson’s Birthday
    Louise Hay’s Birthday
    Sigourney Weaver’s Birthday
    Chevy Chase’s Birthday
    Cara Gosselin’s Birthday
    Gauri Khan’s Birthday
    Grayson Allen’s Birthday
    The Miz’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
       Pierogi  Day
    October 8 is Pierogi Day, a day to stock up your fridge with delicious dumplings made of unleavened dough.

    Usually stuffed with meat, potatoes, vegetables and fruit, pierogi have become popular in the United States and Canada due to large Polish immigrant population.
    Considered to be one of Poland's national dish, pierogi are first boiled and then served several at a time with melted butter or fried with onions.
    Pierogi Fest
    In Eastern Europe, most countries have their own version of this dumpling. In the United States, pierogi are a popular dish in Polish communities and many events are held in honor of this humble but delicious dish. In Whiting, Indiana, a pierogi fest is held for 3 days in July, while in Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, every Pittsburgh Pirates baseball home game features a pierogi race, where runners in pierogi costumes compete in a race.
    How to Celebrate?
    Visit your local Polish restaurant and order yourself a big plate of pierogis. Make sweet and savory pierogis at home and serve to family and friends. Did You Know...
    ...that people in the village of Glendon in Alberta, Canada love pierogi so much that in 1993 they constructed a 25 feet tall fibreglass pierogi, with a fork through it?
     
     
    ***
     
     
    Don't ever pay a surprise visit to a child in college. You might be the one getting the surprise. I learned this the hard way when I swung by my son's campus during a business trip. Locating what I thought was his fraternity house, I rang the doorbell. "Yeah?" a voice called from inside.

    "Does Dylan Houseman live here?"

    "Yup," the voice answered. "Leave him on the front porch. We'll drag him in later."
     
    ***
     
    I spent an afternoon helping my boyfriend move into a new home. In one carton I found a crockpot, with an odd-looking and very dirty metal lid. Later I ushered my boyfriend into the kitchen and asked why he hadn't mentioned this perfectly good pot.
    He stared at it, then replied,
    "Well, after I broke the lid I never thought of replacing it with a hubcap."
     
    ***
     
    It seemed that all our appliances had broken in the same week, and repairs were straining our budget. So when I picked up the kids from school and our Jeep started making rattling sounds, I decided that rather than burden my husband, I'd deal with it. I hadn't reckoned on my little tattletales, however.
    They rushed into the house with the news: "Daddy, the Jeep was breaking down, but Mom made the noise stop!"

    Impressed, my husband asked, "How did you fix it?"

    "I turned up the volume on the radio," I confessed.
     
    ***
     
    During that first roll call in the Army, I waited in dread as the sergeant got to my name: DiFeliciantonio.
    There was bound to be trouble, and 
I was right, because suddenly, he 
fell silent—eyebrows arched, brain overloaded.
    After a long pause, he thundered, “The alphabet?!”
     
     
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    sandrewn
  13. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 07 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 432
    October 7th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Justina of Padua Henry Muhlenberg (some Lutheran Churches, Episcopal Church of the USA) Osgyth Our Lady of the Rosary Pope Mark Sergius and Bacchus October 7 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Teachers' Day (Laos)  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    International Day of Peaceful Communication
    Kids Music Day
    Manufacturing Day
    National Body Language Day
    National Forgiveness & Happiness Day
    National Inner Beauty Day
    National Jonathan Day
    National LED Light Day
    World Cotton Day
    You Matter To Me Day
    National Bathtub Day
    Plaidurday
    Team Margot Stem Cell and Bone Marrow Awareness Day
    Simon Cowell’s Birthday
    Mookie Betts’s Birthday
    Matthew Roloff’s Birthday
    Holland Roden’s Birthday
    KITTENS’s Birthday
    John Mellencamp’s Birthday
    Toni Braxton’s Birthday
    Lay’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances (2)
    Frappé  Day
    Whether you pronounce it with an emphasis on the accented e (frapay) or with a silent e (frap), we can all agree that the chilled and frothed coffee is yummy. Celebrate this beverage on October 7 or Frappé Day.

    Made by blending instant coffee, milk and crushed ice, Frappés originated in Greece. According to popular lore, the drink was accidentally created by a distributor of Nestle products in the Greek city of Thessaloniki during the 1957 Thessaloniki International Fair. Today, the frappé is a popular coffee drink all over the world.
    In the New England region of the United States, the term Frappe (pronounced as frap) refers to milkshakes. Many coffee shops offer Frappés in a variety of flavors and with or without coffee.
    How to Celebrate?
    Visit your favorite coffee shop and treat yourself to a frappé. Start the day with making a frappé from scratch at home. Experiment with flavors - add chocolate to the drink or honey or maple syrup instead of sugar. Add ice cream to it to make it into a decadent dessert drink. Did You Know…
    …that the word frappé comes from the French word for beating or striking together?.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    World Smile Day
    The first Friday of October every year is celebrated around the globe as World Smile Day. The unofficial holiday encourages people to do acts of kindness to spread good will and cheer.

    First started in 1999 by the creator of the smiley, Harvey Ball, the holiday celebrates the intent behind the now universally recognized icon - to bring a smile of the faces of people around the world. The purpose of the holiday was the move away from the commercialization of the smiley and to use it as a symbol of kindness and affection.
    Morale Booster
    The smiley made its debut in 1963 as a way to increase the morale of the employees of a life insurance company. Today, it is one of the most popular nonverbal ways to convey joy, happiness and cheer. The smiley face began as a bright yellow circle with two dots to represent eyes and a black line that represents a smiling mouth.
    Emoji
    Today, there are many different versions of the smiley, representing many other human emotions such a sadness, surprise, worry and laughter. In modern texting smileys are used to express emotions in online conversations on a smartphone or on a computer. The practice has its origin in Japan, and the smileys and other icons are known as emoji.
    How to Celebrate?
    Make people around you smile. Do a random act of kindness. Buy a stranger a coffee. Compliment someone. Give your seat up to someone on the bus. Surprise someone in your family with a visit, cook a meal for them, or do something special for them. Volunteer your time and/ or money at a local nonprofit organization. Did You Know...
    ...that babies are born with the ability to smile?
     
     
    ***
     
     
    A woman called the Colorado State Division of Wildlife regarding a snake in her backyard. “Can you tell me what kind it is?” she asked.
    “Can you describe it?” I asked.
    “Yes,” she said. “It’s long and thin.”
     
    ***
     
    I spotted several pairs of men’s Levi’s at a garage sale. They were sizes 30, 31, and 32, but I was looking for size 33. So I asked the owner if he had a pair.
    He shook his head. “I’m still wearing the 33s,” he said. “Come back next year.”
     
    ***
     
    When my customer ordered 
iced tea, I asked, “Sweetened or 
unsweetened?”
    Her answer: “What’s the difference?”
     
    ***
     
    Looking for a job? Here’s one posted on Craigslist:
    “$40K a Year to Attend Harvard University as Me.”
    Requirements include a 4.0 GPA in high school or a 3.5 GPA in college. Only males need apply, since, as the listing tells us, “I have a male name.”
    The lucky person tapped for the gig doesn’t have to do much other than “attend all classes, pass all tests, 
and finish all assigned work while pretending you are me.”
    Don’t worry about having to actually get into 
the Ivy League school:
    “I’ve already taken care of that,” he says.
     
     
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    sandrewn
  14. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 06 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 431
    October 6th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Blessed Marie Rose Durocher Blessed Juan de Palafox y Mendoza Bruno of Cologne Faith Mary Frances of the Five Wounds Pardulphus Sagar of Laodicea October 6 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) William Tyndale (commemoration, Anglicanism), with Myles Coverdale (Episcopal Church (USA)) World Space Week (October 4–10) Day of Commemoration and National Mourning (Turkmenistan) Dukla Pass Victims Day (Slovakia) German-American Day (United States) Memorial Day for the Martyrs of Arad (Hungary) Teachers' Day (Sri Lanka) Yom Kippur War commemorations: Armed Forces Day (Egypt) Tishreen Liberation Day (Syria)  
    Observances (click on the day for deta
    National Noodle Day
    Bring Your Bible To School Day
    Honduras: Discovery of America Day
    Inbox Zero Day
    National Badger Day
    National Coaches Day
    National Depression Screening Day
    National Energy Geek Day
    National Isabella Day
    National Orange Wine Day
    National Plus Size Appreciation Day
    National Transfer Money to Your Daughter Day
    Turkmenistan Earthquake Memorial Day
    World Cerebral Palsy Day
    National Physician Assistant Day
    Trevor Lawrence’s Birthday
    Melanie Robbins’s Birthday
    Monique Samuels’s Birthday
    King Badger’s Birthday
    LeBron James Jr.’s Birthday
    Joe Goldberg’s Birthday
    Fannie Lou Hamer’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
    Mad Hatter Day
    Celebrated annually on October 6, Mad Hatter Day celebrates the Hatter, a key character in Lewis Carol’s Alice in Wonderland.

    The unofficial holiday was created in 1986 in Boulder Colorado by a group of computer technicians who were inspired by the Hatter and his antics in the epic fantasy novel.
    In the book, the Hatter is an eccentric milliner for whom time is forever stuck at a tea party with his friend the March Hare.
    10/6
    The date for the holiday was chosen because of how John Tenniel illustrated the Hatter in Alice in Wonderland. The English illustrator who was also a political cartoonist depicted the Hatter wearing a hat with a piece of paper that has 10/6 written on it. The 10/6 refers to the cost of a hat – 10 shillings and 6 pence. The creators of the holiday who are from the United States where the date is written in the month/day (mm/dd) format took this to set the date for the holiday on October 6 (10/6). For those who write the date in the day/ month (dd/mm) format, the holiday would fall on June 10.
    How to Celebrate?
    Read Alice in Wonderland. Watch the movies based on the novel. Wear a hat the whole day. Host an Alice in Wonderland themed tea party. Did You Know...
    ...that even though this holiday is called Mad Hatter Day and that the Hatter is also popularly known as the Mad Hatter, Lewis Carol never refers to the character as the Mad Hatter?
     
     
    ***
     
     
    After a number of attempts to get the customer service agent on the phone to understand his name, my Asian American friend Appappa decided to spell it out.

    "A for apple," he began. "P for pineapple, p for pineapple, a for apple, p for pineapple, p for—"

    The flustered agent interrupted. "I have a better idea," she said. "Just tell me how many apples and how many pineapples."
     
    ***
     
    My husband, who uses a wheelchair, showed up at his eye doctor's for an appointment. The receptionist checked the schedule, then said, "The nurse will call you in a moment. Have a seat."

    He smiled. "Done."
     
    ***
     
    I provide technical support for the computer software published by my company. One day, over the phone, I was helping a customer install a product on a Macintosh. The procedure required him to delete an old file. On the Mac there is an icon of a trash can that is used to collect items to be permanently deleted.

    I told the customer to click on the old file and drag it to the trash. Then I had him perform a few other steps. As a reminder, I said, "Don't forget to empty the trash.

    Obediently he replied, "Yes, dear."
     
    ***
     
    The village blacksmith hired an enthusiastic new apprentice 
willing to work long, hard hours.
    
He instructed the boy, “When I take the shoe out of the fire, I’ll lay it on the anvil. When I nod my head, you hit it with the hammer.”
    The apprentice did exactly as he was told, and now he’s the new village blacksmith.
     
     
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    "A Scottish theme tonight"
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

     
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    ( Sorry, I just couldn't resist this one! )
     
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    ( 78th Highlanders group, Montreal, Qc, 1869 )
     
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    sandrewn
  15. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 05 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 430
    October 5th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    World Space Week (October 4–10) Armed Forces Day (Indonesia) Christian feast day: Anna Schäffer Faustina Kowalska Blessed Francis Xavier Seelos (Roman Catholic Church) Blessed Bartolo Longo Thraseas Hor and Susia (Coptic Orthodox Church of Alexandria) Placid and Maurus Placidus (martyr) October 5 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Constitution Day (Vanuatu) Engineer's Day (Bolivia) International Day of No Prostitution Republic Day (Portugal) Teachers' Day (Pakistan) Teachers' Day (Russia) World Teachers' Day  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    Balloons Around the World Day
    Canadian Beer Day
    National Do Something Nice Day
    Random Acts of Poetry Day
    Global James Bond Day
    National Pumpkin Seed Day
    National Kale Day
    National Get Funky Day
    Country Inn Bed & Breakfast Day
    Yom Kippur
    Coffee with a Cop Day
    Dashain
    International Walk to School Day
    Janmostav of Srimatna Sankardev
    Kiribati: Education Day
    National Above the Bus Day
    National Apple Betty Day
    National Be Nice Day
    National Caribbean Civility Day
    National Kiss a Wrestler Day
    National Military Podcast Day
    National Rhode Island Day
    National Walk and Bike to School Day
    Semana Morazánica
    Vijayadashami
    World Meningitis Day
    Nicky Hilton’s Birthday
    Rachel Brathen’s Birthday
    Mario Lemieux’s Birthday
    Neil deGrasse Tyson’s Birthday
    Bernie Mac’s Birthday
    Mahogany LOX’s Birthday
    Jesse Eisenberg’s Birthday
    Joe Torgerson’s Birthday
    James Valentine’s Birthday
    Gerardo Ortiz’s Birthday
    Erica Banks’s Birthday
    Dillon Francis’s Birthday
    Steve Miller’s Birthday
    Aaron Carpenter’s Birthday
    Kate Winslet’s Birthday
    Travis Kelce’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
    Chic Spy Day
    October 5 is Chic Spy Day, a day to acknowledge that a well-dressed spy is always more successful in catching the bad guys than a scruffy one.

    The unofficial holiday is a tribute to the elegant and stylish spies in popular culture and was created in 2015 by chicspy.com, a fashion website. It commemorates the anniversary of the day in 1962, when the chicest spy of all – James Bond – made his debut on the big screen in a movie called Dr. No. Starring Sean Connery and Bond, the film was based on a novel of the same name by Ian Fleming.
    Fashionable and Resourceful
    The spy genre of movies has frequently featured sophisticated and well-dressed protagonists who are not only equipped with fighting skills that can put a ninja to shame, but are also charming, attractive and immensely likable. All spies - men or women - in movies tend to own state-of-the-art espionage and surveillance equipment.
    As a genre, spy movies are as old as the film industry. They became especially popular during the Second World War and the Cold War era. Today, spy movies tend to focus on themes such as terrorism and governmental corruption.
    How to Celebrate?
    Have a favorite spy? Spend the day watching his or her movies. Watch Dr. No and all of James Bond's movies. Have a spy party. Ask your guests to dress up like their favorite spy; serve shaken, not stirred martinis; and share notes about why you think your favorite spy is the chicest. Did You Know…
    …that even though Dr. No was the first James Bond film, Casino Royale was the first Bond novel ever published?
     
     
    ***
     
    Q. How do you make the number one disappear?
    A. Add the letter G and then presto—it's Gone!
    ***
    Q. There's a one-story house where everything inside is pink: pink walls, pink doors, pink floors, pink ceilings, pink windows, pink curtains, pink chairs, and pink tables.
    What color are the stairs?
    A. There are none—it's a one-story house!
    ***
    Comedian Daniel Tosh is no fan 
of the expression “The worst day 
of fishing is better than the 
best day at work.” “I’ve watched The Deadliest 
Catch on Discovery,” 
he said. “I’ve never once 
been at work, capsized in 
40-degree water, watched all my coworkers die, and been like, ‘Hey, at least we’re fishin’.’”
    ***
    If you stop eating doughnuts you will live three years longer, but it's just three more years that you'll want a doughnut.
    ***
    A few weeks? after the death of my father-in-law, I found my seven-year-old son crying in bed. His grandmother had died the previous year, and he was taking it all very hard. "You know, Kyle," I said, "when we die, we'll get to see Grandma and Grandpa again in heaven."

    With tears spilling down his face, Kyle cried, "That's easy for you to say. You don't have that long!"   ***
     
    Three fans were bemoaning the sorry state of their football team.
    “I blame the general manager,” said the first fan. “If he signed better players, we’d be a great team.”
    “I blame the players,” said the 
second fan. “If they made more of 
an effort, we’d score some points.”
    “I blame my parents,” said the third. “If I’d been born in Seattle, 
I’d be supporting a decent team.”
     
     
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    sandrewn
  16. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 04 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 429
    October 4th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Amun Francis of Assisi Petronius of Bologna October 4 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Cinnamon Roll Day (Sweden and Finland) Day of Peace and Reconciliation (Mozambique) Independence Day, celebrates the independence of Lesotho from the United Kingdom in 1966. The beginning of World Space Week (International) World Animal Day  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    Ship in A Bottle Day
    National Cinnamon Roll Day
    National Vodka Day
    Ayudha Puja
    Improve Your Office Day
    International: Chung Yeung Festival
    Kindness to Animal Day
    Maha Navami
    Mahanavami
    Martyrdom of Imam Hassan Asgari
    National Fruit at Work Day
    National Golf Lovers Day
    National Truckers Appreciation Day
    Navami of Durga Puja
    Nepal: Maha Navami
    World Dyslexia Day
    World Habitat Day
    Lil Mama’s Birthday
    Melissa Benoist’s Birthday
    Ignazio Boschetto’s Birthday
    Jovita Moore’s Birthday
    Amara La Negra’s Birthday
    Derrick Rose’s Birthday
    Russell Simmons’s Birthday
    Charlton Heston’s Birthday
    Dakota Johnson’s Birthday
    Caitriona Balfe’s Birthday
    Buster Keaton’s Birthday
    Ashley Banjo’s Birthday
    Rich Homie Quan’s Birthday
    Rupi Kaur’s Birthday
    Fintan Magee’s Birthday
    Yoon Jeonghan’s Birthday
    Alicia Silverstone’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
    Taco Day
    Lettuce taco 'bout Taco Day. It's on October 4 and that gives you the perfect excuse to spend the entire day eating tacos.

    A traditional Mexican version of the sandwich, a taco is a tortilla stuffed with filling. Usually made of corn or wheat, the tortilla can be filled with beef, chicken, vegetables, pork or seafood and served with cheese, cilantro or onions as garnish.
    Different Kinds
    In Mexico, tacos are generally associated with fresh tortillas, while in the United States, one can find many different types of tacos. Some of these include hard shelled tacos, made of deep fried U shaped tortillas; fried tacos, which are made by frying tortillas stuffed with filling; and tacodillas which is made by stuffing cheese between two tortillas and then adding a filling to the top tortilla.
    How to Celebrate?
    With tacos, lots and lots of tacos! Start the day with breakfast tacos - eggs, bacon and breakfast sausage wrapped in a tortilla. Have a vegetarian taco with beans, rice, jalapeño peppers and guacamole for lunch and delicious pork, beef or chicken tacos for dinner. Finish the day with dessert tacos - tacos filled with ice cream, fruit or cream and topped with chocolate or fruit sauce. Experiment with the flavors of the taco filling. What about making some Korean-inspired tacos by adding some kimchi or an Indian version of the taco with some curried chicken? Did You Know…
    …that in 18th century Mexico, tacos referred to pieces of paper that Mexican miners wrapped around gunpowder to make holes in mines?
     
     
    ***
     
    Q: What’s the difference between a cat and a comma?
    A: One has claws at the end of its paws,
    while the other is a pause at the end of a clause.
     
    ***
     
    The military may have invented the Internet, but not all government schemes have worked as well. In 
the ’60s, the CIA hatched a plan to implant a battery and a microphone in a cat so the furry feline could 
spy on unsuspecting targets. The program was halted when, after years of research and millions of 
dollars spent, the spy cat was run over by a cab.
     
    ***
     
    A woman walked into my aunt's animal shelter wanting to have her cat and six kittens spayed and neutered.
    "Is the mother friendly?" my aunt asked.
    "Very," said the woman, casting an eye on all the pet carriers. "That's how we got into this mess in the first place."
     
    ***
     
    I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth when my squad leader barged in. He was holding a toothbrush, which he proceeded to use to scrub underneath the rim of a toilet.
    “What are you doing?” I asked.
    “Hazing the new guy,” he said with a grin.
    “You do know that he could get ill from the bacteria on the toilet.”
    His reply was quick and to the point:
    “You didn’t.”
     
     
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    (?!?!?!?!?!)
     
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    Home schooling, and you thought you had it bad!!!
     
    ***
     

    Not today, Mr. Snake
     
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    (This one I really like)
     
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    ( " Uh oh!" )
     
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    sandrewn
  17. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 03 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 428
    October 3rd 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Abd-al-Masih Adalgott Blessed Szilárd Bogdánffy Dionysius the Areopagite Ewald the Black and Ewald the Fair Francis Borgia John Raleigh Mott (Episcopal Church) Gerard of Brogne Hesychius of Sinai Théodore Guérin Maximian of Bagai October 3 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) 3 October Festival (Leiden, Netherlands) German Unity Day (Germany) Mean Girls Day Morazán Day (Honduras) National Day, celebrates the independence of Iraq from the United Kingdom in 1932. National Foundation Day or Gaecheonjeol (South Korea)  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    Virus Appreciation Day
    World Day of Bullying Prevention
    National Boyfriend Day
    Boqueron Battle Victory Day
    Buy British Day
    Durga Ashtami
    Honduras: Francisco Morazan's Birthday
    Labour Day
    National Child Health Day
    National Consignment Day
    National Kevin Day
    National Techies Day
    National Wide Awakes Day
    Nepal: Maha Ashtami
    World Architecture Day
    Lil Tracy’s Birthday
    Lindsey Buckingham’s Birthday
    Al Sharpton’s Birthday
    Richard Painter’s Birthday
    Stevie Ray Vaughan’s Birthday
    Neve Campbell’s Birthday
    Drake White’s Birthday
    Bang Chan’s Birthday
    Ashlee Simpson’s Birthday
    Michele Morrone’s Birthday
    Gino Cosculluela’s Birthday
    Gwen Stefani’s Birthday
    India Arie’s Birthday
    Tommy Wiseau’s Birthday
    Zlatan Ibrahimovic’s Birthday
    A$AP Rocky’s Birthday
     
     
    ***
     
    A Harley rider eating in a restaurant is checking out a gorgeous redhead. Suddenly she sneezes and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket. The biker reaches up, snatches it out of the air, and hands it back to her. "I am so embarrassed," the woman says. "Please join me for dinner."

    They enjoy a wonderful meal together and afterwards she invites him to the theater, followed by drinks. She pays for everything. Then she asks him to her place for a nightcap, and to stay for breakfast.

    The next morning the guy is amazed. "Are you this nice to every biker you meet?" he asks.

    "Not usually," she replies. "But you just happened to catch my eye."
     
    ***
     
    A friend of mine works at a tattoo shop. A client walked in and got a sentence tattooed on his back. A few hours later, the customer called, 
demanding a refund.
    Client: You did my tattoo backward!
    Tattoo artist: It’s backward?
    Client: Yes! I’m looking at it in the mirror right now!
     
    ***
     
    “Why did you choose a college so far from home?” I asked my British student. She explained that she’d fallen 
in love with the American West by watching Westerns. So when it came time to apply for colleges, she Googled “Western universities.”
    And that’s how she ended up here, at Western Carolina University.
     
    ***
     
    Our boss asked the new mail-room guy to make three copies of 
an office key.
    The guy returned ten minutes later with the copies …
    which he’d made on the Xerox machine.
     
     
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    sandrewn
  18. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 02 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 427
    October 2nd 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Batik Day (Indonesia) Christian feast day: Denha I of Tikrit (Syriac Orthodox Church) Memorial of the Holy Guardian Angels Leodegar October 2 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Gandhi's birthday-related observances: Gandhi Jayanti (India) International Day of Non-Violence Independence Day, celebrates the independence of Guinea from France in 1958 National Grandparents Day (Italy)  
    Observances (click on the day for details)
    Change A Light Day 
    Guardian Angels Day
    International Blessings of The Fishing Fleet Day
    Maha Saptami
    National Custodian Day
    National Fried Scallops Day
    National Michelle Day
    National Name Your Car Day
    National Police Memorial Day
    National Produce Misting Day
    National Report Long Term Acute Care Hospital Fraud Day
    Nepal: Phulpati
    World Communion Sunday
    World Farm Animals Day
    Rubi Rose’s Birthday
    Phia Archer’s Birthday
    Renni Rucci’s Birthday
    Luke Wale’s Birthday
    Nat Turner’s Birthday
    Akira Akbar’s Birthday
    Lei Melendres’s Birthday
    Kelly Ripa’s Birthday
    Kennedi Hines’s Birthday
    Jacob Sartorius’s Birthday
    Jessika Power’s Birthday
    HunniBee ASMR’s Birthday
    Jackie Goldschneider’s Birthday
    Groucho Marx’s Birthday
    Sting’s Birthday
    Lal Bahadur Shastri’s Birthday
    Zena Foster’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
    Phileas Fogg Wager Day
    October 2 is Phileas Fogg Wager Day. The holiday celebrates key events in Jules Verne’s novel Around the World in Eighty Days.

    In the book, Phileas Fogg, the main character of the 1873 novel makes a wager of 20,000 pounds to circumnavigate the Earth in 80 days on October 2, 1872. This unofficial holiday celebrates the wager that set out one of the world's most famous adventure in motion.
    Fiction with Real Places
    Around the World in Eighty Days is a book that covers some of the biggest changes in the world of transportation and travel that were happening in the late 19th century. Some of these included the construction of the Suez Canal, the starting of the Indian Railways and the transcontinental railroad in the United States. The novel also follows the adventures Fogg has while circumnavigating the world.
    The book was first published as a series in French. According to an introduction by William Butcher who translated the book to English, the closing date of the series, December 21, 1872 coincided with the last day of the wager. this made many people reading the series believe that the journey was actually taking place in real time
    How to Celebrate?
    Read the novel and find out if Phileas Fogg wins the wager. Read the other works of Jules Verne including Journey to the Center of the Earth and Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea. Watch movie and TV adaptations of the book. Did You Know…
    …that Jules Verne is one of the world’s most translated authors?
     
    ***
     
     
    I was getting into my car when I noticed a dent. On the windshield was a note and a phone number from the driver. "I feel terrible," the woman apologized when I called. "I hit your car as I was pulling into the next parking spot."
    "Please, don't worry," I said to her. "I'm sure our insurance companies will take care of everything."
    "Thank you for your understanding," she said. "You're so much nicer than the man I hit on the way out."
     
    ***
     
    We purchased an old home in northern New York State from two elderly sisters. Winter was fast approaching, and I was concerned about the house's lack of insulation. "If they could live here all those years, so can we!" my husband confidently declared. One November night the temperature plunged to below zero, and we woke up to find interior walls covered with frost.
    My husband called the sisters to ask how they had kept the house warm. After a brief conversation, he hung up.
    "For the past 30 years," he muttered, "they've gone to Florida for the winter."
     
    ***
     
    Which windshield wiper blade always quits first? That's right—the driver's side. This happened to me one day while driving home in the middle of a blinding storm. Unable to see, I pulled over and tried to figure out a quick fix. I found it in a yellow cotton work glove that was lying on the floor. I wedged the cloth hand under the wiper arm.
    It did a great job keeping my windshield clear. Not only that— you'd be surprised at how many people waved back.  
     
    ***
     
    After trick-or-treating, 
a teen takes a shortcut home 
through the cemetery. Halfway across, he’s startled by a tapping noise coming from the misty shadows.
    Trembling with fear, he spots 
an old man with a hammer and chisel, chipping away at a headstone.
    “I thought you were a ghost,” 
says the relieved teen. “What are you 
doing working so late?”
    “Oh, those idiots,” grumbles the old man. “They misspelled my name!”
     
     
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    sandrewn
  19. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 01 Oct 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 426
    October 1st 2022 - Holidays and Observances
     
    (click on the day for details)
    Armed Forces Day (South Korea) Beginning of the United States' Fiscal Year Children's Day (El Salvador, Guatemala, Sri Lanka); celebrated on the first Friday of October (Singapore), assignation and recognition on the first Wednesday of October (Chile) Christian feast day: Abai (Syriac Orthodox Church) Bavo of Ghent Blessed Edward James Nicetius (Roman Catholic Church) Remigius Thérèse of Lisieux Protection/Patronage of the Theotokos (Eastern Catholic Churches) October 1 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Day of Prosecutors (Azerbaijan) Earliest day on which Teacher's Day can fall, while October 7 is the latest; celebrated on the first Sunday of October. (Belarus, Kyrgyzstan, Latvia, Ukraine) Earliest day on which World Habitat Day can fall, while October 7 is the latest; celebrated on the first Monday of October. (International) Ground Forces Day (Russia) Independence Day, celebrates the independence of Cyprus from United Kingdom in 1960. Independence Day, celebrates the independence of Nigeria from United Kingdom in 1960. Independence Day, celebrates the independence of Palau from the UN Trust Territory status in 1994. Independence Day, celebrates the independence of Tuvalu from United Kingdom in 1978. International Day of Coffee International Day of Older Persons Lincolnshire Day (United Kingdom) National Day of the People's Republic of China (People's Republic of China) Pancasila Sanctity Day (Indonesia) Tampere Day (Finland) Teacher's Day (Uzbekistan) Unification Day (Cameroon)  
    Observances (click on the day/week for details)
    International Coffee Day
    International Music Day
    National Homemade Cookies Day
    World Vegetarian Day
    World Card Making Day
    National Hair Day
    CD Player Day
    National Black Dog Day
    Albuquerque International Balloon Fiesta
    Balloons Around the World Day
    Frugal Fun Day
    International Raccoon Appreciation Day
    Investiture of the Captains Regent in San Marino
    Model T Day
    National Bookshop Day
    National Fire Pup Day
    National Lace Day
    ROK Alliance Day
    World Ballet Day
    World Sake Day
    Chinese National Day
    Zach Galifianakis’s Birthday
    Priah Ferguson’s Birthday
    RD Benji’s Birthday
    Nathaniel Drew’s Birthday
    Peter Thomas’s Birthday
    Matthew Daddario’s Birthday
    Jurnee Smollett-Bell’s Birthday
    Myles Parrish’s Birthday
    Latisha Scott’s Birthday
    Isis King’s Birthday
    Julie Andrews’s Birthday
    FGTeeV Chase’s Birthday
    Drew Chadwick’s Birthday
    Dorian Hunter’s Birthday
    Delianna Urena’s Birthday
    Brie Larson’s Birthday
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~
    Walk Your Dog Week
    Sat Oct 1st, 2022 - Fri Oct 7th, 2022
     
    Observances (click on the month for details)
    Dysautonomia Awareness Month
    Family History Month
    National Domestic Violence Awareness Month
    Mental Health Month
    National Fair Trade Month
    National Cyber Security Awareness Month
    Black Cat Awareness Month
    National Pizza Month
    SUDEP Action Month
    Dyslexia Awareness Month
    Canadian Library Month
    National Fire Prevention Month
    Computer Learning Month
    Down Syndrome Awareness Month
    National ADHD Awareness Month
    Breast Cancer Awareness Month
    Emotional Intelligence Awareness Month
    Filipino American History Month
     
    Fun Observances
    International Observe the Moon Night
    International Observe the Moon Night (InOMN) is an annual celebration of our closest celestial neighbor - the Moon. The date of the unofficial holiday changes every year.

    InOMN is led by scientists, astronomers, teachers, policy makers and science and astronomy organizations around the world and is sponsored by NASA's Lunar Reconnaissance Orbiter, NASA's Solar System Exploration Research Virtual Institute (SSERVI), and the Lunar and Planetary Institute. The holiday is an attempt to spread scientific information about the Moon among the public, and encourage people to learn more about Earth's only natural satellite through observing it and by interacting with lunar experts.
    Mysterious Origins
    Thought to be between 4 to 4.5 billion years old, the Moon's birth is a bit of mystery. The current prevailing scientific theory of its creation suggests that it was formed as a result of a collision between the Earth and another planet, the size of Mars.
    The second brightest celestial objects in our sky, next only to the Sun, the Moon has been instrumental in creating the world as we know it today. Without the Moon, The Earth and life would be very different. The nights would be much darker, tides would be fewer and smaller, and the Earth's axial tilt would be less stable. And we would have no eclipse – solar or lunar.
    Capturing Imaginations
    Throughout history, the Moon has captured the imagination of people around the world. Since antiquity, astronomers, philosophers, spiritualists and religious leaders have all tried to understand and explain the mechanism of day and night, the Moon's phases and lunar eclipses. In addition to helping keep time, the Moon was worshipped as a deity in many ancient cultures. Even today, lunar phenomena such as Blue Moons, Supermoons, Micro Full Moons and Black Moons are popular astronomical events that gather extensive public interest.
    Basis of Calendars
    In many parts of the world, lunar or lunisolar calendars are still used to determine dates of cultural and religious holidays. Lunar calendars, such as the Islamic calendar, are strictly based on the phases of the Moon. Because the lunar year (354.35 days) is shorter than the solar or tropical year (365.25) by about 11 days, lunar calendars tend to be out of sync with solar calendars such as the Gregorian calendar and the Julian calendar.
    Lunisolar calendars, such as the Chinese calendar or Hindu calendars used in many parts of India, use both moon phases and the solar year to overcome this drift.
    How to Celebrate?
    This one's simple. Just step out and look up the sky to behold the wonder of the Moon. Here are some more ways to spend this celestial holiday:
    Find an Observe the Moon night event close to you and attend it. Join other astronomy and lunar enthusiasts and spend the evening and night observing the Moon. Spend the day learning more about the Moon and how it affects life on Earth. Did You Know...
    ...that a person's weight on the Moon is about 1/6 of his or her weight on Earth?
    International Observe the Moon Night Observances
     
     
    ***
     
     
    “What are you doing?” asked my mother after I pressed several 
buttons on her microwave.
    “Reheating these leftovers for two minutes at 80 percent.”
    “I didn’t know you could do that.”
    “Sure. How do you reheat bacon?”
    “Oh,” she said, “that’s two biscuits and a popcorn.”
     
    ***
     
    My friend forgot his laptop on the floor of my room. My grandma thought it was a scale.
    
Conclusion: My grandma weighs $950.
     
    ***
     
    Take heed, scientists: Not every scientific advancement is Nobel Prize worthy. Some must lay claim to an Ig Nobel Prize, awarded by the Annals of Improbable Research magazine:
    The Prize for Physiology went to the report "No Evidence of Contagious Yawning in the Red-Footed Tortoise."
    The Prize for Medicine went to a study that demonstrates that people make better decisions about some kinds of things — but worse decisions about other kinds of things — when they have a strong urge to urinate.
    The Prize for Biology went to the discovery that a particular kind of beetle mates with a particular kind of Australian beer bottle.
     
    ***
     
    A husband and wife had been married for 60 years and had no 
secrets except for one: The woman kept in her closet a shoe box that 
she forbade her husband from ever opening. But when she was on her deathbed—and with her blessing—he opened the box and found a 
crocheted doll and $95,000 in cash.
    “My mother told me that the secret to a happy marriage was to never 
argue,” she explained.
    “Instead, I should keep quiet and crochet a doll.”
    Her husband was touched. Only one doll was in the box—that meant she’d been angry with him only once in 60 years.
    “But what about all this money?” he asked.
    “Oh,” she said, “that’s the money 
I made from selling the dolls.”
     
     
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    Finally something new I learned on the net today!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
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    sandrewn
  20. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 30 Sep 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread CRumbs 425
    September 30th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Agricultural Reform (Nationalization) Day (São Tomé and Príncipe) Birth of Morelos (Mexico) Blasphemy Day, educates individuals and groups about blasphemy laws and defends freedom of expression Boy's Day (Poland) Christian feast day: Gregory the Illuminator Honorius of Canterbury Jerome September 30 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Independence Day (Botswana) or Botswana Day, celebrates the independence of Botswana from United Kingdom in 1966. International Translation Day (International Federation of Translators) National Day for Truth and Reconciliation or Orange Shirt Day (Canada)  
     
    Observances (click on the day or week for details)
    International Podcast Day
    Extra Virgin Olive Oil Day
    Fiesta de San Jerónimo (Nicaragua)
    German Sandwich Day
    International Blasphemy Rights Day
    National BRAVE Day
    NATIONAL CHEWING GUM DAY
    National Love People Day
    NATIONAL MUD PACK DAY
    National Puppy Mill Survivor Day
    Orange Shirt Day
    Pet Tricks Day
    Rumi Day
    Save The Koala Day
    Sport Purple for Platelets Day
    Thunderbirds Day
    World’s Biggest Coffee Morning
    Ask a Stupid Question Day
    Trevi Moran’s Birthday
    Raveena Aurora’s Birthday
    Max Verstappen’s Birthday
    Maddie Ziegler’s Birthday
    Fran Drescher’s Birthday
    Elie Wiesel’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
    Hot Mulled Cider Day
    If you are in the Northern Hemisphere chances are that by the time the end of September rolls by, the days are getting shorter and colder. Warm the days up by drinking Hot Mulled Cider on September 30.

    Hot Mulled Cider Day is a made up holiday that celebrates the beverage made out of warm apple cider mixed with brown sugar and spices such as cinnamon, nutmeg, mace and cloves.
    How to Celebrate?
    Make a batch of hot mulled cider and share it with family and friends. Add some alcohol to the cider to make an adult beverage. Did You Know…
    …that technically cider is an alcoholic beverage made out of fermented apple juice? In many parts of the world, however, cider usually refers to non alcoholic fermented apple juice, while hard cider refers to the alcoholic version of the juice.
     
     
    ***
     
     
    After leaving the Army, I applied for a hunting permit but was told I would first need to take a hunter’s safety course.
    “I’m a veteran, trained in handling firearms,” I said. “Why wouldn’t I get a waiver?”
    The clerk replied, “Because we teach you not to shoot people.”
     
    ***
     
    I just got a GPS for my car, and my first trip with it was to a drugstore. Since the manual said not to leave it in the car unattended, I brought it with me into the store.   While there, the GPS came alive, and a voice stated, "Lost satellite contact."   I wasn't embarrassed until a woman turned to me and said, "Your ankle bracelet monitor is talking to you."  
    ***
     
    A wealthy New Yorker, "dressed in the Abercrombie & Fitch version of What a Man Should Wear in the Wilderness," walks up to a laconic Maine lobsterman.
    "I see you are using fish bait for lobsters. You think it's good, do you?" he asks.
    The lobsterman shakes his head. "No, I don't. But the lobsters do."
     
    ***
     
    Hospital regulations require a wheelchair for patients being discharged. However, while working as a student nurse, I found an elderly gentleman already dressed and sitting on the bed with a suitcase at his feet-who insisted he didn't need my help to leave the hospital.
    After a chat about rules being rules, he reluctantly let me wheel him to the elevator. On the way down, I asked if his wife was meeting him.
    "I don't know," he said. "She's still upstairs in the bathroom changing out of her hospital gown."
    ***
     
    I Owe My Life to Justin Bieber…
    ... I was in a coma for two years, until a nurse played one of 
his songs on the radio in my room, and I had to wake up 
to turn it off.  
     
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    sandrewn
  21. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 29 Sep 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 424
    September 29th - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Charles, Duke of Brittany Hripsime Jean de Montmirail Theodota of Philippi September 29 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) the Archangels Michael, Gabriel, and Raphael. One of the four quarter days in the Irish calendar. (England and Ireland). Called Michaelmas in some western liturgical traditions. Inventors' Day (Argentina) Victory of Boquerón Day (Paraguay) World Heart Day  
    Observances (click on the day or week for details)
    National Coffee Day
    National Starbucks Day
    CONFUCIUS DAY
    International Day of Awareness of Food Loss and Waste
    International Happy Goose Day
    National Biscotti Day
    National Carson Day
    National Police Remembrance Day
    National Silent Movie Day
    VFW DAY
    World Maritime Day
    Andy Frisella’s Birthday
    Bria Hamilton’s Birthday
    Ice Poseidon’s Birthday
    Molly Eskam’s Birthday
    Nicholas Galitzine’s Birthday
     
     
    ***
     
    My wife is a very adventurous cook. “How does this sound?” she called out from the kitchen. “Bonito, surimi, and anchovies in a decadent, silky broth.”
    “Sounds delicious,” I hollered back. “Is that what we’re having tonight?”
    “No. I’m reading from this packet of cat food.”
     
    ***
     
    On a trip to Sweden, I asked a few people where I could find some good local cuisine. “This is a pretty cosmopolitan city, so you can find just about any kind of international food that you’d like,” said one man.
    “But if you want truly local cuisine, get the meatballs at IKEA.”
     
    ***
     
    Working as a telemarketer for MCI Communications, I made a call to a Minnesota home one evening. When a boy around eight answered the phone, I identified myself, told him I was calling for MCI and asked to speak to his parents.
    As he put the phone down, I heard him yell, "Dad! Dad! The FBI wants to talk to you!"
    As soon as the father answered the phone in a quivering voice, I said, "Sir, this is not the FBI; this is MCI Communications."
    After a long pause, the man said, "This is the first time I am actually glad to hear from you guys."  
     
    ***
     
    The DMV was as crowded and noisy as ever. When I finally got to the 
window, I asked the clerk,
    “Does the never-ending line of loud people ever drive you crazy?”
    She shook her head. “We call it job security.”
     
     
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    August 15, 2016
     
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    Northern white rhinoceros - Wikipedia
     
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    You know you're getting old (really old), when you recognize the speaker and all of the audience (Kermit, Punch and Howdy Doody).
     
     
     
     
    sandrewn
  22. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 28 Sep 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 423
    September 28th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast day: Aaron of Auxerre Annemund Conval Eustochium Exuperius Faustus of Riez John of Dukla Leoba Lorenzo Ruiz Paternus of Auch Richard Rolle, Walter Hilton and Margery Kempe (Episcopal Church (USA)) Simón de Rojas Wenceslas September 28 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics). Czech Statehood Day (Czech Republic) Freedom from Hunger Day International Day for Universal Access to Information National Day of Awareness and Unity against Child Pornography (Philippines) Teachers' Day (Taiwan and Chinese-Filipino schools in the Philippines), ceremonies dedicated to Confucius are also observed. World Rabies Day (International)  
    Observances (click on the day or week for details)
    National Drink Beer Day
    Fish Tank Floorshow Night
    Gedaliah Fast
    International Poke Day
    International Right To Know Day
    National Chris Day
    National North Carolina Day
    National Neighbor Day
    National Self Awareness Day
    NATIONAL STRAWBERRY CREAM PIE DAY
    National Women’s Health And Fitness Day
    Spencer Rattler’s Birthday
    Naomi Watts’s Birthday
    Jasper Dolphin’s Birthday
    Momona Tamada’s Birthday
    Brigitte Bardot’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances (2)
    Ask a Stupid Question Day
    September 28 is Ask a Stupid Question Day, a day that is devoted to all stupid and silly questions out there.

    Originally an unofficial American holiday, the date coincides with the last day of school in September. The day encourages students to ask more questions in classrooms.
    How to Celebrate?
    They say that there are no stupid questions. So, don't hesitate, ask stupid questions and if someone asks you a stupid question, have a stupid answer ready. Did You Know…
    …that the question mark (?) originated as a contraction of the Latin word quaestiō , meaning question? According to this theory, people in the Middle Ages, contracted the q and o by putting the o under the q. Over time, the q and the o turned into the question mark (?) we know today.
     
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
     
    Good Neighbor Day
    Neighbors are an integral part of our social lives – whether at home or at work. Good Neighbor Day on September 28 is an annual holiday that promotes neighborliness and niceness towards people who surround us.

    The holiday was created by Becky Mattson of Arizona in the 1970s as a way to encourage neighbors to be good to each other. In 1978, then American President, Jimmy Carter issued a proclamation that designated September 24, 1978 as National Good Neighbor Day. In 2004, the United States Senate passed a resolution to celebrate September 26, 2004 as National Good Neighbor Day.
    Prior to 2003, the holiday was celebrated on the fourth Sunday in September. Now it is unofficially celebrated in the U.S. and around the world as Good Neighbor Day.
    How to Celebrate?
    Be nice to your neighbor – at home or elsewhere. If you don’t know your neighbors well, maybe today is your chance to go up to them and strike up a conversation. Bake some goodies and share them with your neighbors. Bring them to work for your work neighbors. Invite your neighbors to your home for a meal. Don’t live in the U.S.? Don’t let that stop you from showing your appreciation for your neighbors. Did You Know…
    …that the word neighbor comes from the Old English word neahgebur, where neah means near and gebur means inhabitant?
     
    ***
     
    I recently learned a valuable lesson regarding what not to say to patients. At our large hospital, I watched as a nursing assistant pushed an elderly woman in a wheelchair. As he opened the door leading from the clinic into the hospital wing, the patient looked confused.
    “Where are we?” she asked.
    The nursing assistant gently explained, “We’ve gone over to the other side.”
     
    ***
     
    My sister got a call from her son’s kindergarten teacher. When he’d gone in to check on Little James in the bathroom, he noticed the boy was using a urinal.
    “That’s odd,” my sister said. “We never taught him how to use a urinal.”
    “I could tell,” said the teacher. “He was sitting in it.”
     
    ***
     
    When a neighbor's home was burglarized, I decided to be more safety conscious. But my measly front-door lock wasn’t going to stop anyone, so I hung this sign outside:
    "Nancy, don’t come in. The snake is loose. Mom."
     
    ***
     
    I’m now in high school, so when I ran into my third-grade teacher, I doubted she would remember me.
    “Hi, Miss Butcher,” I said.
    “Hi, Eddie,” she replied.
    “So you do remember me?” I asked.
    “Sure. You don’t always leave a good impression, but it is a lasting one.”
     
     
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    sandrewn
  23. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 27 Sep 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 422
    September 27th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast days: Adheritus Caius of Milan Vincent de Paul Cosmas and Damian September 27 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Consumación de la Independencia (Mexico) French Community Holiday (French community of Belgium) Independence Day (Turkmenistan), celebrates the independence of Turkmenistan from USSR in 1991. Meskel (Ethiopian and Eritrean Orthodox Church, following Julian calendar, September 28 on leap years) National Gay Men's HIV/AIDS Awareness Day (United States) Polish Underground State's Day (Poland) World Tourism Day (International)  
    Observances (click on the day or week for details)
    Ancestor Appreciation Day 
    Morning Show Hosts Day
    National AJ Day
    National Chocolate Milk Day
    NATIONAL CORNED BEEF HASH DAY
    National Crush Day
    National No Excuses Day
    National Scarf Day
    Avril Lavigne’s Birthday
    Gwyneth Paltrow’s Birthday
    Jaiden Animations’s Birthday
    Jenna Ortega’s Birthday
    Joie Chavis’s Birthday
    Lil Wayne’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
    Crush a Can Day
    Take out all your frustrations and anger and be green and environmentally friendly at the same time by crushing a can to celebrate Crush A Can Day on September 27.

    There are few things in life as satisfying as feeling a can squish and bend between your fingers, and this unofficial holiday is the perfect excuse to crush as many cans you can find. And it is environmentally friendly too! Take all your crushed cans to the recycling center to be recycled and given a new life.
    Cans are containers usually used to store and transport goods and perishable food and beverages. In most grocery markets, you can find two types of food cans – tin cans and aluminum cans. In many parts of the world all cans irrespective of what they are made of are called tin cans.
    It is not known who created this holiday.
    How to Celebrate?
    Start collecting cans in anticipation of this day. On the day of, host a can crushing party. Use cans to decorate your venue and serve food and beverages – just make sure they have been cleaned out thoroughly and are not rusted. Then gather around in your backyard with friends and family and get crushing. Line up those cans and go crazy on them. Hold a can crushing contest – whoever crushes the most cans gets to take all of them to the recycling center! Be very careful when you crush cans. If you are unable to crush them leave them at your closest recycling center – let the experts deal with it. Did You Know…
    …that recycling one tin can save enough energy to run a television for 3 hours?
     
    ***
     
    Recently I heard the former mayor of Reading, Pennsylvania, 
recount some funny stories about his time in office. One happened while he was running for reelection; he was in a bar and paid for a 
woman’s drink. She thanked him but wondered why a stranger had 
bought her a beer.
    “I’m running for mayor,” he told her, “and I want your vote.”
    “You got it,” she said, grabbing her glass. “Anyone’s better than the jerk who’s in there now.”
     
    ***
     
    My 16-year-old brother, Ryan, was out late with friends one night. Suddenly he realized it was Father’s Day and he had neglected to buy a card for our dad. After much searching, Ryan located an open store, but was disappointed to find only two cards left on a picked-over rack. Selecting one, he brought it home and, somewhat sheepishly, presented it to our father.
    Upon opening it, Dad read this message: “You’ve been like a father to me.” He looked at Ryan, puzzled.
    “Well, Dad,” Ryan tried to explain, “it was either that or the card that said, ‘Now that I’m a father too!’”
     
    ***
     
    I was visiting my mother one day, when she passed the candy dish full of chocolates and took one for herself. “I thought your doctor told you to stop eating candy,” I said.
    “Oh, I don’t have to listen to him anymore,” she replied.
    “Why not?”
    “He died.”
     
    ***
     
    A Pennsylvania couple had trouble selling their home after strange apparitions and sounds forced them to admit in their ad that it was “slightly haunted.”
    The Week asked its readers to put a more 
positive spin on the sales pitch:
    • “A home suited for free spirits”
    • “Mostly not haunted”
    • “113-year-old Victorian, still cared for by original owners”
    • “A place for all your possessions”
    • “This house has good bones”
    • “Your kids will make new friends”
     
     
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    sandrewn
  24. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 26 Sep 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 421
    September 26th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Christian feast days: Canadian Martyrs (Catholic Church in Canada) Cosmas and Damian John of Meda Nilus the Younger Wilson Carlile (Anglican) September 26 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Day of the National Flag (Ecuador) Dominion Day (New Zealand) European Day of Languages (European Union) National Good Neighbor Day (United States) Petrov day Revolution Day (Yemen)  
    Observances (click on the day or week for details)
    Better Breakfast Day
    Johnny Appleseed Day
    National Chimichanga Day
    National Family Day
    National Pancake Day
    Alpaca Day
    European Languages Day
    FAMILY AND COMMUNITY DAY
    Human Resource Professional Day
    International Day for the Total Elimination of Nuclear Weapons
    Lumberjack Day
    Maharaja Agrasen Jayanti
    Maldives: Qaumee Dhuvas
    Mera Chaoren Houba
    Mysore Dasara
    National Amanda Day
    National Compliance Officer Day
    National Day of Praise and Worship
    National Dumpling Day
    National Hari Day
    National Law Enforcement Suicide Awareness Day
    National Mesothelioma Awareness Day
    National Situational Awareness Day
    Navratri
    Shamu the Whale Day
    World Day of Migrants and Refugees
    Ant Antixx’s Birthday
    Asuka’s Birthday
    Johnny Appleseed’s Birthday
    Killumantii’s Birthday
    Lilly Singh’s Birthday
    Sherri Gaskins’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
    Love Note Day
    September 26 is Love Note Day, an unofficial holiday that encourages you to write and send notes full of love to the special person in your life.

    A Forgotten Art
    Almost as old as the first written language, the love note has historically been one of the most romantic ways to tell that special person how you feel about them. However, with the fast pace of our modern day lives, the art of writing love notes and exchanging them with one's sweetheart is slowly dying. Love Note Day aims to change this.
    Conveys Many Emotions
    A love letter or note is a way to pen down one's deepest feeling about another person. It does not have to romantic or sappy. It can convey a vast selection of emotions, from adoration to anger, from joy to sadness, and from admiration to disappointment.
    How to Celebrate?
    Walk away from your computer screen, bring out the scented paper, the fanciest pen you have, and find yourself an inspiring place to sit and get cracking on that love note! Give it to your sweetheart, perhaps during a nice meal or while on a walk in the park. If you don't have time to handwrite your love note, maybe you could send your love a nice email that says how much you love and appreciate them? Leave some love notes around your home for your loved one to find. Hide them in their lunch or their gym bag, stick the note to the bathroom mirror, so that's the first thing they see in the morning, or quietly slip it into their pockets before they leave home. Don't have a special someone? Who says a love note can be only for a romantic partner? Send a note to a friend or a family member to tell them how much you love them! Read love notes and letters written by famous people - maybe they will inspire you to write one of your own. Did You Know...
    ...the oldest surviving Valentine's Day love letter in the English language dates back to 1477? Called the Valentine's Day Love Letter, the note was written by Margery Brews to her fiancé John Pasto.
     
     
    ***
     
    During a visit with my grandmother, my husband noticed a birthday card from a local funeral parlor.
    “That was nice of them,” he said.
    She was unimpressed. “They only want me for my body,”
     
    ***
     
    Colonoscopies are important medical procedures that have saved lives. And yet they’re as popular 
as, well, a colonoscopy. Here are 
comments purportedly made by 
patients to physicians during their procedures.
    “Now I know how a Muppet feels!”
    “Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head is not up there?”
    “Any sign of the trapped miners, chief?”
     
    ***
     
    We were an Air Force family, but our son could not grasp that 
fact. Anytime someone asked what his father did, he’d say, “He’s in the Army.”
    I told him umpteen times, “Stop telling people I’m in the Army!” It finally seemed to hit home because on the admittance form 
for kindergarten, under “father’s 
profession,” the teacher wrote,
    “He doesn’t know what his father does, but he’s not in the Army.”
     
    ***
     
    After 12 years of therapy, 
my psychiatrist said something that brought tears to my eyes.
    He said, “No hablo Inglés.”
     
     
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    sandrewn
  25. sandrewn

    My Daily Bread Crumbs 25 Sep 2022

    By sandrewn,


    Bread Crumbs 420
    September 25th 2022 - Holidays and Observances
    (click on the day for details)
    Armed Forces Day or Revolution Day (Mozambique) Christian feast day: Abadir and Iraja and Companions (Coptic Church) Aunarius (Aunacharius) Anathalon (Archdiocese of Milan) Cadoc Ceolfrith Cleopas Euphrosyne of Alexandria Finbarr Fermin of Amiens Lancelot Andrewes (Church of England) Sergius of Radonezh (repose) Vincent Strambi September 25 (Eastern Orthodox liturgics) Day of National Recognition for the Harkis (France) National Research Administrators Day (United States)[13] National Youth Day (Nauru)  
    Observances (click on the day or week for details)
    Better Breakfast Day
    National Daughters Day
    National Lobster Day
    Bathukamma Starting Day
    Binge Day
    Death of Prophet Muhammed
    German Butterbrot Day
    Gold Star Mother’s and Family Day
    International Ataxia Awareness Day
    Mahalaya
    Martyrdom of Imam Reza
    Math Storytelling Day
    National Cooking Day
    National Food Service Employee Day
    National John Day
    National Psychotherapy Day
    National Quesadilla Day
    National Roadkill Day
    National Tune-Up Day
    National Wade Day
    National YogaFit Day
    National One-Hit Wonder Day
    One-Hit Wonder Day
    Research Administrator Day
    Rosh Hashanah
    World Day of The Deaf
    World Dream Day
    World Pharmacists Day
    World Rivers Day
    World’s Largest Pet Walk
    Barbara Walters’s Birthday
    Donald Glover’s Birthday
    Jayda Cheaves’s Birthday
    Mark Hamill’s Birthday
    T.I.’s Birthday
    Will Smith’s Birthday
     
    Fun Observances
    Comic Book Day
    September 25 is Comic Book Day. The holiday celebrates the art and science behind comic books and encourages people to read and share comic books.

    A comic book is a book that tells stories through pictures or illustrations and text. The story is usually divided into sequential panels and dialogs and thoughts of the characters are presented in a stylized graphic called a speech bubble or balloon.
    From Strip to Book
    While stand-alone and series comic strips have been around for a very long time – the earliest recorded comics can be traced back to 113 AD on Trajan’s Column located in Rome – historians believe that the first comic book ever published was in 1837 in Europe. Called The Adventures of Mr. Obadiah Oldbuck, the book was written by Swiss writer, Rudolphe Töpffer.
    Superheros
    By the 1930s comic books had become a big business in the United States. Known as the Golden Era of comics, the late 1930s and 1940s saw a surge in the genre of superhero comics starting with the publication of Superman in Action Comics #1 in 1938. This period saw the debut of other comic book heros that we are all very familiar with today. Some examples include: Wonder Woman, Batman and Captain America. During and after World War II, the popularity of superhero comics took a hit. It was only in 1956 when a more modern version of Flash made his debut that the Silver Age of Comics was ushered in.
    The 1970s and 1980s are known as the Bronze Age of Comics. Comics became darker and plot lines included real world problems like corruption, environmental disasters and alcoholism. This trend has continued in recent years. Comic historians also sometimes call it the Dark Age of Comic Books.
    How to Celebrate?
    Have a favorite comic book character party where guests come dressed as their favorite comic book character. Visit your local comic book store and pick out a new comic book to read. Lend your favorite comic books to your friends so they can also get interested in reading them. Did You Know…
    …that the Incredible Hulk, a comic book character known for growing in size and becomes more powerful when he is angry, was originally drawn as a gray by its creator Stan Lee? However, because of printing issues, Marvel, the publisher of the comic decided to change him to green.
     
     
    ***
     
    We disbar lawyers and we defrock clergy, so why don't we:
    Delight electricians?
    Derange cowboys?
    Depose models?
    Debark tree surgeons?
    Depress dry cleaners?
     
    ***
     
    ‘Where is everybody?" the cowpoke asks.

    "They've all gone to see Brown Paper Pete hang," says a bystander.

    "Why do they call him that?" the cowboy asks.

    "Well, he always wears a brown paper hat, a brown paper shirt, and brown paper trousers."

    "Really?" says the cowboy. "And what are they hanging him for?"

    "Rustling."
     
    ***
     
    The gladiator was having a rough day in the arena—his opponent had sliced off both of his arms. Nevertheless, he kept on fighting, kicking and biting as furiously as he could. But when his opponent lopped off both feet, our gladiator had no choice but to give up, for now he was both unarmed and defeated.
     
    ***
     
    The checkout clerk at the supermarket was unusually cheerful even though it was near closing time.
    “You must have picked up a ton of groceries today,” a customer said to the checker. “How can you stay so pleasant?”
    “We can all count our blessings,” the clerk replied.
    “The hardest part of this job is the turkeys and the watermelons. I just thank God that Thanksgiving doesn’t come in July.”
     
     
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    Snowman's Funeral
     
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    sandrewn
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