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I wouldn’t say Kevin’s dad beat the shit out of his mom, so much as their fights sometimes got mutually physical—she threw something at him first, after all. But yeah, I included it because it’s really his first scene that’s not completely filtered through Kevin’s POV. He's not a saint; Kevin just sees him that way. And, oh my God, yeah, real talk: it’s so weird meeting people who are substantially younger but still adults. Duncan’s the same age I am now, and I could not at all imagine being with a 21-year-old college junior without feeling ancient. So, naturally, Duncan gets to feel that way too.

Glad you're liking it. And yes, that line sums everything up pretty well. Kevin's been lucky, in the sense that he's largely avoided legal ramifications for his profession... but he's really spent his life bouncing from one extremely precarious situation to the next, and I think we can all see from a mile away that these are likely to blow up in his face.

That's Kevin's curse: everyone he's loved has been, for whatever reason, unable to fully reciprocate--from his parents to Becker. And I think he's defensive about that, about not wanting to get hurt again.

Thanks! Yeah... Kevin's pretty street-smart, mature, charismatic, but he's also been hurt so many times. He's not great at knowing what's best for him.

It's tough, right? Becker's big on avoidance and compartmentalization... making a strong declaration of self (as would be required for someone coming out) is deeply terrifying to him, and it's going to be hard for him to get around that. But, like I said, there's a lot of story left--Becker's story isn't just about coming out, either--so I hope you enjoy what's to come!

I definitely loved being in a fraternity, but it's not for everyone. (We were a pretty tame one, though we had a reputation for throwing good parties.) I definitely picture my fraternity house when I stage the party scenes in my head though. It'll be fun for Becker to go through, basically, what he did the semester before, except behind the scenes. It's a lot more glamorous when you're a pledge looking in from the outside, than when you're trying to wrangle a bunch of drunk 20-year-olds to participate in a shadowy ritual. But it's fun. Becker's definitely in kind of a dark place at the moment, over Kevin. He goes in a lot of different directions--there's a lot of plot that happens before Kevin even returns, let alone after.

Glad you're enjoying it! I'm trying to keep updates as regular as possible--"Against the World" has to come at a slightly faster speed because of where the plots intersect--but, obviously, life intervenes. Becker's journey is interesting, because I've always believed his biggest issues are about self-worth--he's not in the closet because he's scared of being disowned (it's actually pretty clear--probably to him too--that it's not going to markedly change his relationships with anyone) but because he doesn't want to face who he is. But this pain does force him to take stock of a lot of things, at least internally. Kevin's still gone for several more months in this story, but there's still a lot unresolved between him and Becker.

So, I started the very first draft of this story about 5 1/2 years ago, and it's just funny to look back on things: I was much closer to Becker's age (and to being back in the closet) back then. I have to dig much deeper to think like a closeted nineteen-year-old now. It's interesting in its own way, but it does force me to stop wanting to drag Becker out of the closet and yell at him, "IT'S NOT THAT BIG A DEAL." But, of course, he's still a kid. It's tough for him, even if it might have cost him Kevin.

Glad you're enjoying them! Becker's an interesting character because I think he does have a good heart, and he does care deeply about Kevin, but he's so twisted in his own bullshit, in a lot of ways. But he still has a special place in my heart--he deserves to be happy, even if he's going to try to do everything he can to prevent himself from actually getting there.

I can't really say anything without giving anything away, but it's worth remembering that Kevin's been a pretty stand-up guy, as far as we can tell.

Glad you're enjoying it! Matt's an interesting character, and Kevin will keep giving us more and more pieces of him (both in the past and present) but he has a much, much larger role in this story than the (few) appearances he's made so far.

“Your fucking mom should’ve let you fucking rot in fucking juvie,” J.C. told me, the moment I walked through the door of his house. “What the fuck did I tell you? ‘Don’t Fucking Do Stupid Shit.’” I closed my eyes. It had been a long day. It was just after three o’clock in the morning. I had to sneak back out of the house after my mom went to bed. Because I had a text from J.C. Nine texts, actually. All a variant of: “If you don’t come to my fucking house the second you’re bac

“Oh, God, you’re so fucking tight, Peter,” said Luke Avery, as the head of his cock slowly pressed inside my hole. It was not the lube Kevin used. It was runnier, less viscous. For as slender as Luke was, his hands were strong; his hands grabbed each of my hips, and he slowly started to sink the rest of his dick in. He wasn’t as big as Kevin, but I felt it. “Stop, stop,” I said. “More lube.” Maybe that was what happened when you fell out of the habit of bottoming regularly. Which

Thanks. The death scene, in particular, was something I was really dreading because I didn’t want it to come off so schlocky and melodramatic, but I thought this story would’ve missed a major piece of Kevin if it happened off-screen. Luckily, the structure is made up of these little puffs of memory, so I didn’t have to spend too much time on Kevin grieving.

Basically, yeah. Part of it was me trying to keep the voices and structure different, but in a way that stayed true to the characters. Becker’s very compartmentalized. And his past was a lot of being a bland “good kid” and his concerns are very in-the-moment—how people perceive him or react to him. Memories don’t creep in on him as much, but he’s far more to obsess over a glance or an errant comment. Kevin’s the opposite. He’s so defined by past trauma, and the bad (well-meaning, but bad) advice he’s been given on how to deal with difficult things: namely, flip the page and forget. Kevin’s too sensitive to really do that, so fragments of the past keep popping up. Even as he keeps claiming he’s moved on from them.

Wow, yeah, you’re completely right—that was an oversight on my part. Fixed! Good catch.

Thanks! Like I said in the comment above, there's so much story left between the two of them. Obviously, they're apart now, but Kevin does drift back into the story--and remains a focal point of "The Best Four Years" for quite a while. So stayed tuned. Thanks for reading, and glad you're enjoying it!

In some ways, both of them need to get their shit together, but I was actually Team Kevin during the breakup scene (and I was surprised more people weren't!) because I think Becker was pretty routinely selfish during their entire relationship. But there's a ton more story left--for both of these guys, both apart and together--so you'll have to see what happens!

Thanks! I'm glad you're liking it... like I said to the comment above, it's harder to write this story than Becker's. But I think the emotional payoff is going to be better. Hopefully.

Thanks! Glad you're enjoying it. Kevin's story is tougher to write than Becker's... because Becker's problems are, for the most part, pretty luxurious. Kevin's are not. But it's kind of funny: Kevin's whole mantra is to turn the page, forget what came before, and start anew--and yet he's so incapable of doing that. Considering how many memories flow in and out of him. Considering how most of this story is, actually, his memories.

Haha, I think both he and Kevin have good hearts. Part of why they broke up, I think, is because they're both lost. But Kevin at least realizes he's lost, which is progress. He'll learn a lot in France, before he reenters the main story.

Having too much fun this summer, I’m afraid—otherwise, these would be coming faster! The home chapters are always weird to write, because it’s such a sidebar from the action of the story—it’s Becker, largely without any other of the main characters. But that’s what home for the holidays are: banality. People going through motions. Weird glimpses of the people you think you’ll avoid becoming but totally will become. But yeah, I initially wrote this chapter only with the phone sex scene, but I thought it needed to be a little sexier—because you’re right; there’s a lot of bickering and nosy grandmothering—and I remembered Luke Avery from the first Christmas chapter, and thought I’d bring him back. And Luke Avery is adorable. I love that cute gay dork. The sex scenes in “Against the World”—the Kevin story—are a little sexier, because Kevin’s honestly just better at sex. Becker’s are all a little sloppy, which I love. Especially when he’s around someone as clumsy as he is. I love that someone got the little Home Alone homage: Kevin alone on Christmas. And it’s definitely not the worst Christmas he’s ever had—Kevin’s life is, generally, one sad event after another. Which is hard to write in the other story, because I don’t want it to be such a downer, but it’s interesting to explore. Because, by comparison, Becker’s life is exceptional in its easiness. Thanks for commenting—glad you’re enjoying it!

Halloween. 2006. Not really Halloween. October 28, 2006. The fifth anniversary of my dad’s death. We were at the Iota Chi Halloween party. Or I was. Becker was adrift somewhere in a story. “Of course, that’s when we lived at the White Hawk Courthouse,” he was telling me, absently rounding out his story, as we waited at the kitchen bar for fresh beers. “Before we moved to DC.” His story had been about gambling, casinos, something-something Las Vegas. His dad’s small ownership

Glad you’re liking it! I’m excited for people to see Kevin without Becker’s distortion. He’s always fascinated me as a character, and it’s fun to take him further. Carver’s been an interesting character to write for this one, because he's obnoxious but was very much intended as a one-off character who was a foil to Becker… still figuring out how to write him without completely turning off everyone, but hopefully he'll get his redemption too.

Becker’s plenty insecure, but he can bend a guy over a desk with the best of them. And I wouldn’t describe either exchanging mutual blowjobs or some flirtatious sexting as dominant/submissive relationships—Becker’s the instigator and very much the one in control in both situations.