redwood

A very emotional chapter. I teared up twice, when Anna and then Angelo wept. Especially where Angelo talks about his dad like he's still alive, then remembers to use the past tense. Mundane moments like that can be so poignant. Like Gianni receiving that surprise package after his parents died. It must be a comforting thought that when someone we care about dies, they go to heaven or are "with god now." I tried but could never bring myself to believe that. I think the sense of loss can be deeper if you don't feel sure that the soul continues in a better place. It's total separation, with no prospect of reunion after your own death. So Angelo's grief resonates with me.

I'm afraid we're about to find out how hard it is to be a gay teenager in this rural setting. Gianni and Angelo are getting kinda obvious. Especially with that "how do you know you're in love" question in the last chapter. Gianni thought he was being clever, but it's no idle notion. What role will the priest play? He's being set up as a potential moderating influence, once the cat's out of the bag, with his tolerance for Gianni finding religion on his own terms and his comment that "your association has not gone unnoticed." Curious! As far as I've gathered, there's plenty of liberal-minded Catholics -- perhaps more laypeople than priests -- and it would be an interesting twist for the priest to fall into that camp. Speaking of interesting twists, I love the idea of Gianni writing to his deceased parents. It seems he gets to be more candid than if he had to brave coming out to a living set of parents. But his comfort putting the words to paper does suggest that his parents might have taken the news well.

This chapter made my day. Thank you! You reminded me of my first and only time trying cigarettes. Just one acrid inhale and I was coughing like crazy. Had to try... but never again!

If there's a way to work this into the story, Dodger, I'd be curious to learn what Sue ever saw in Don, from her perspective. Like, what is she trying to hold on to? Even if we have nothing positive to say about him now... why did she marry him in the first place? Or when did she start to wonder if it was a mistake?

Don is irredeemable. Memo to Sue: get a lawyer and start the divorce proceedings. Actually, let's hold for proof that Don got the cocaine and set up Robbie for the fall... even better for a divorce case! One way or the other, the family should be physically separated from Don. This is already traumatizing the kids. How will Amy be affected, seeing her dad act like a raging homophobic prick? The silver lining is now that Don is showing his true colors, there are consequences. Sue is being pushed to support Robbie. About time!

This story is a joy to read. Your descriptions of the landscape, towns, and cities of Italy are so evocative, they leave me with strong mental images of the place. You inspired me to look up Ravello on Google Street View. I love the hairpin turns in roadways and the views of terraced hillsides. And how exciting to learn that Villa Cimbrone is real! Seeing a photo of that wall with the "infinity view," and its rounded top, gave me the shivers. As someone who's hiked in dry Mediterranean climates during the summer, the descriptions of the relentless sun and soporific heat ring true. No wonder people take siestas. It reminds me of Call Me by Your Name and all the people lounging around during the heat of the day. I like reading fiction that I can learn from, especially stories that introduce me to daily life in other cultures. Simmering pasta sauce, pergolas, palazzi, and pine trees -- I feel transported to Italy!

This story is a painful read right now, Dodger, but I appreciate your willingness to get real. It's hard and sometimes impossible for people to overcome a traumatic upbringing. Alex showed some promise, despite growing up in the most dysfunctional family. In the end, though, he's a sexual predator and needs to be reported and locked up. I fear for Robbie at this point. He may have re-injured his head, on top of recurring dizzy spells, but refuses to see a doctor. He won't see a real therapist (not that crackpot Symmonds). And he feels doomed, like it's pointless to get help when he'll die soon anyway. If he had functional adoptive parents, he might not feel the need to hide his problems. As it is, Robbie needs to go to Nicola or Rory, anyone he can trust. I really hope this is not a downward spiral for Robbie. After more than 100 chapters, I'm kind of attached! As for Nathan, I'm sick of his attitude. What about owning up to his share of blame for the breakup? Clearly Robbie viewed him with rose-tinted glasses at first, and the story reflected that viewpoint, but he has a definite self-absorbed and mean streak. Wouldn't surprise me if he did cheat on Robbie but lied to claim moral superiority. Overall, the story has taken a really interesting turn since the downfall of their relationship. This could have been an extended high-school love story/happily ever after. It's become something more complex -- an unpredictable rollercoaster. Here's hoping there's some light at the end.

A lovely chapter, Dodger, with an emotional reunion scene. Robbie's repeated expressions of disbelief that Tom was there in person really got to me. You could tell how much it meant to be with his old best friend again. A real full-circle moment in Robbie's life, where he can see how much he's changed since leaving England. Tom's flirty comments about Robbie ("too cute to be single") and Nathan ("he's got a nice bottom") were quite the surprise! You had sold me on Tom being a straight guy except for an experimental phase with Robbie. This could go in a number of directions now. Some kind of consensual three-way with Robbie and Nathan? Hooking up with Alex? I'm also very interested in how Don's behavior changes after the adoption ceremony. I sense that he has some more tricks up his sleeve to try to restrict Robbie's relationship. Thanks!

I love this story. Tyrone is a total riot. What 18-year-old would have the chutzpah to make a move on a stranger of the same sex? Even if his gaydar went off, it's a ballsy move. I read the above comments about this being sexual harassment and respectfully disagree. My take is that Tyrone got an accurate read on Andy's body language and acted on that evidence with a little kiss, just to feel him out. The employer-contractor relationship makes it edgy behavior, though, and I'd see it as more inappropriate if they had a long-term work relationship where Andy was financially dependent. I'm also enjoying the whole mystery of "church." Is this known slang in England, Dodger, or just a word you came up with?

I think it's possible. Ply Don with his favorite booze, become drinking chums, then get real the next morning. Don was diverted at the dinner table, but what he did manage to say was revealing. How often do people claim "I'm not homophobic" or "I'm not a racist" when they clearly are? It's rhetorical bullshit to make people look more tolerant than they are. And what a strange comment that it's ok for Nathan to be gay but not Robbie. So Nathan is a lost cause, but there's still hope for Robbie to change course? Enthralling as always, Dodger!

I loved this chapter. It's such a pleasure to see Robbie become comfortable in his own skin. Openly gay does suit him! However, old habits die hard, and he's still being secretive about Alex. I'm curious what about his relationship with Alex he finds embarrassing. I think it's not just the sex, but shame about how he was drugged and basically molested, and another heap of shame about hiding it from Nathan. As a lot of others said, Sue is pissing me off. She mouths platitudes about how Robbie is loved and part of the family, then treats him as an embarrassment to her own parents. It comes across as deceitful. If she were less conflict avoidant, she might explain that she's struggling with the gay thing but still loves him. Honesty goes a long way.

So happy to see a new chapter! I think I've heard Newfie used as shorthand for the Newfoundland dog. But you're going more for the person than the dog, right? Alex is becoming one of my favorite characters. At first I was unhappy to see him reenter the story -- the drugging of Robbie was hard to forgive, and he could screw up Robbie's relationship with Nathan -- but he's kind of a lovable rogue. You never know what crazy shit he'll say or do. My favorite line is: The best part is I can fully imagine Alex doing this! I agree with everyone else on Sue. She seems to have no personal problem with Robbie being gay, but isn't willing to stick up for him and confront Don about his prejudice. What's holding her back? I can imagine a fear of Don's temper or risking her financial security by putting their relationship to the test. Or maybe Sue doesn't really approve of or understand Robbie being gay and is just trying to keep the peace.

I think Robbie and Nicola are good for each other. Nicola sometimes needs someone to knock her down a peg -- or into a pool. The book getting ruined made me sad, though! Speaking from experience, you might be able to salvage the book but the pages turn wavy and stained. Lol! I also thought Daniel's reveal was appropriate. He's not a bad person, he was just uncomfortable and needed time to figure out where he stood. Finally, thanks for extending this story beyond its preconceived ending... the longer, the better!

Hi, I haven't logged in and commented in a while, but I've been reading all along. It makes me so happy to see how popular this story has become. It deserves to be seen by a wide audience. A few thoughts at this point in the story: 1) I find Don's rigid homophobia surprising, considering he lives in suburban Ontario and seems to be well educated. As an American, I have this image of Canada as a socially liberal haven except for places like rural Alberta. Thankfully the rest of Robbie's family is much more sympathetic. Nicola will not take this shit lying down. Maybe she'll be the one who shames Don and changes his mind? 2) What is Daniel's problem? Is it feeling betrayed by Robbie and his best friend hooking up behind his back? Is it latent homophobia? Can't wait to find out! 3) I love how you don't write flat characters; they're multi-faceted and evolve over time. It's been especially gratifying to watch Nicola turn from enemy to hero (and sad to see Daniel turn into an icicle). 4) Please watch the quotation marks. In a few places this chapter, I found a missing one in dialogue or an extra one that's out of place.

Another awesome chapter, Dodger. Milk in bags? Ick! I can imagine the liquid sloshing around in that plastic, and it's not a pleasant thought. As I've said before, you have a real talent for one liners. Robbie's "I was locked up" in a tower comment is one of my favorites. What a nut! Let's hope he doesn't get locked up in his room when he come out to Sue and Don. On second thought, you should totally do that and then have Nathan climb through the window like in Rapunzel. And the use of cockney as a secret language, like pig Latin, is so appropriate for our guys. No way in hell those other Canucks could have a clue. Thanks for the footnotes, though. Your dialogue is so natural.

Part of what attracts me to this story is that Robbie comes across as real. He's lovable, sincere, imperfect, very considerate at times, inconsiderate at others. What is he, 15? A lot of stories written by adult authors project a mature attitude onto a kid, but it just rings false and contrived. I like watching the gradual evolution, seeing him figure some things out while still having his blind spots (like his flakiness with Rory). If anything, Nathan is a little too angelic to be believed -- or maybe I wasn't lucky enough to meet someone like him in high school! But on the whole, your story is emotionally honest and the characters are believable and well-rounded. Thank you!

Adorable! Robbie and Nathan are proving to have great chemistry, and it's fun to watch the dialogue fly. You have a knack for great one-liners like this: “Shit I look like fuck; I mean fuck I look like shit." I agree with the others that Sue will be supportive. She sent clear *wink wink* signals in her sit-down chat with Robbie. And for some reason, I feel like Nicola will be like Robbie's champion when he comes out. I can totally imagine her relishing the role as the oh-so-enlightened sister and bitch-slapping or antagonizing people until they fall in line.

Excellent story, really heartwarming, and it's clear that you put a lot of thought into it. I like a bit of a challenge as a reader and got a kick out of having to look up the Dutch to English translation on a couple words and phrases. And you generally did a good job of implying the meaning of Dutch words by their context. Also, as someone who lost a parent at a young age, you really capture the spirit of the tragedy. When you write that Colby lost "something integral" and "the ability to connect to the world," I couldn't have put it better myself. It's not just the pain of losing your parent, but the effect on your sense of self and your relationships with other people. I think a myth is an appropriate metaphor for overcoming that loss, if that's what you were going for. Thank you!

Wow, Robbie is making progress by leaps and bounds. My favorite moment is when he got all indignant and stood up to that jerk who called Nathan a fag boy. Maybe not the smartest move for his safety, but a real touching moment. He's willing to defend Nathan and even be affectionate in public. Like, where did this guy come from? I also learned new slang: stroppy! Can't wait to drop that into conversation with other Americans and confuse the hell out of them.

Awwww! What a sweet chapter. Thank you, Dodger, I can say the long wait since The Sexy Shades was worth it. It was cute that Nathan and Robbie got all flustered and could barely string sentences together, for two guys who normally talk rings around other people! Robbie is so besotted, he's sure to out himself soon, willing or not.

Perhaps clueless Daniel finally suspected something at Nathan's party and made him admit to a secret "boyfriend" who is really Robbie? That would be the best scenario for our guy. Of course, Robbie only has himself to blame for not attending the party and being in the dark. And if he hadn't dallied so long with that tortured Fran breakup... Reap what you sow, Robbie!

Drunk Robbie makes for fun reading, but I was afraid he'd get alcohol poisoning. He should totally get grounded for staying out late without calling home. If I were his parent, I'd be bugging out. On the bright side, looks like Fran is rounding into an ally.

First, thanks for continuing this story and posting regularly again. I really missed it. Re: this chapter, how is Fran is still hanging around? What a thick skull. I agree that she may well try extortion when Robbie visits the lion's den. If so, my hope is that Robbie says screw it, you can't blackmail me, and comes out to family and friends on his my own terms. More please!

Ooo you tease! Here I am expecting Robbie to man up and ask Nathan out. Silly me. . I sense more roadblocks coming before the "time is right" for him to cut things off completely with Fran. The drawn-out teen angst is realistic, though. I think I waited a week or two before breaking the news to my high school GF because I had to be in the right frame of mind at the right time and place; in other words, the stars had to align. Waiting with bated breath...

Haha what a jaw-dropping ending! If Robbie was waiting for enticement, that text message fit the bill. All he has to do is ditch Fran. At this point, I'm climbing aboard the anti-Fran train 100%. What is wrong with that girl?! She acts like she owns Robbie, uses him as a human sex toy, and has no real interest in his happiness. If Fran really loved him, in an unselfish way, she'd set him free to try things with a guy. Anyways, I hope your move went smoothly, Dodger. Please keep the chapters flowing once you get settled. This story is a delight, and I'm attached to Robbie and company.