Krista

Happy Birthday!

After my talk with Henry, I gave him a short wave and jogged from the sidewalk to my car. As I was about start the car, though, I saw Luke waving his hands for me to stop. Sighing and remembering what I had just told Henry, and with Henry watching on as if waiting to see what I would do. I let the car idle and waited for Luke to come say whatever he wanted to say before I left for practice. I just hoped this didn’t make me late, after my stunt in the hallway, Coach Tate hasn’t been too thrilled

Happy Birthday!

Ooh, nice. I've seen that a lot too, with people their age. Where they hide their true intent with what they're comfortable with, right or wrong or inappropriate. I'm glad you're seeing the good in Jackson with the lacking of evidence. He has his moments of pure goodness and his moments of pure meanness.. lol.

Thanks for reading! Growth isn't easy, it isn't night and day. That is the entire point of this story for sure. For growth to come, for it to be difficult. Change is difficult to accept and hardly ever welcome. Add the fact that Jackson thinks everything in his life has already fallen into place, he's more unwilling for that change and will be stubborn. I just hope y'all stick with him and see the hopeful progression in him. That is my goal, I think, with this story.

By the end of last chapter, I think Jackson thought Luke didn't need him and in this chapter, it was confirmed in his mind. The expectations from Henry surprised him, he hasn't really had a significant reaction to it other than the promise. If that holds out, if he allows Luke to be a friend, he will grow - yes. If he doesn't.. and relapses, I think he'll be in for a rude awakening in college. lol. The question is, if Jackson is fine where he's at.. or if that will change?

Thanks for reading. You do have Jackson pegged. He thinks he has his life planned out for him. A plan to get out of this small town. An achievement that he is one of the most popular people at their high school. It is all in front of him and he just has to wait for it to fall into his lap - he thinks they are guaranteed no matter what. People like that are sometimes difficult to reach, that sort of tunnel vision. I like your description as Luke as well, very in depth for both characters. Henry - I really want people to like him. He's very optimistic. As I flesh him out you'll see more of him and Cindy.

Thanks for reading! I do have a question: Can Jackson prove himself to you, that he deserves faith people have for him.. as well as Luke's friendship? Or has his actions already made that an unwelcome outcome for these characters? Right now, at this point in the story I agree with you completely, but I'm just curious if he's gone too far? I knew Jackson would be difficult, I wrote the story with that intention. lol. So I am glad people are really worried/angry/not in love with Jackson at this point. I just hope readers stick with him to see if he reaches that redemption moment.

Thanks for reading! This story is a character development story that I've been really wanting to write for a bit. Jackson has a ton of growth so the ending is very wide open. That does sound like a realistic ending for him though.

Hi, thanks for reading. Jackson's Mom, Grace works as one of the top people in a factory. These small town factories run 24 hours a day 6 days a week in different shifts. Usually people near the top of the factory are "on call" most of the time and need to come in and fix mix-ups and such. Small town factories are what this one is based on, I've had family members working for them forever and they're extremely busy - too busy.. but they have to keep up demands placed on them by cooperation or they pull the factory out of the region. Jackson's reaction to seeing Luke is interesting. Is there a turning point for them coming up after Jackson realized that Luke could be fine by himself. That maybe his fear of being followed around by a "lost puppy," in Luke is hollow.. or does he want Luke as a friend? The brat is very difficult to read.. lol. I'm glad you didn't hate Jackson this chapter, he was pretty friendly and cooperative this chapter for sure. I knew after last chapter that he needed a reality check and he got one. Will it stick? We'll see.

I didn't seem to crush/bother Jackson that much either. So maybe, Jackson and Luke both know who they are.. they're just sort of unwilling to let the other one see it. But yes, it was a humbling moment to realize Luke didn't need hims. lol. Thanks for reading!

Thanks for reading! I meant small group, lol. I'm glad you like the story so far.

Happy Birthday!

Congratulations! Well deserved!

After Luke left, my luck didn’t get any better. I picked at my pizza rolls no longer really all that hungry. Then I went off to practice where Coach kicked my ass around the track. Being an assistant football coach too, I hoped he would be distracted by them. Especially since the football team mostly sucked and needed a lot of attention to get them in decent enough shape. Derek and Toby were also in hot water too and spent most of practice running beside me on the track, at least I didn’t have t

Honestly, I'm not a fan of being shown how a character should look. I like to read and form my own image of them as I go along. Not everyone is like that and I'm not saying authors shouldn't post pictures swaying how we picture their characters. Good stories have creative descriptions of characters that allow for readers to form a good mental picture of them. I want my readers to visualize the characters the way they wish to. I will try to guide them, but I won't ever show them outright. We don't really like the, "face in the mirror" paragraphs. (Paragraphs like: My name is Frank, I'm 6'1", blue eyes, brown hair, six pack abs, hairless as the day I popped out of my momma, perfect teeth... etc.) So I'm just taking that to the next level and thinking that being shown, is worse than that. Not saying people who post pictures are wrong and not worth reading. Nothing like that, but as a reader I avoid picture representation of characters until I am finished with the story. Then it is fun to see fan-art, artwork, photos, etc.

I do not really use smells (bad krista, bad). I use vague - the combination of his deodorant and soap... yadda yadda, but I hardly ever do name/brand dropping. You don't really need to, they can have a specific scent tied to them. Like an artist that paints may always faintly smell of paint... or a florist may smell like a certain flower, etc. It doesn't have to be cologne specifically, it can be any smell that a person can relate to and understand.

I like the other guy better.. Tom not so much. Too small/petite for my liking. But, that speedo will so fall off as soon as he hits the water.. it doesn't have too far to go.

And what a tongue lashing he may get from his momma too. He will deserve this one, I think. lol. He isn't thinking, so you hit him on the head with that one. He reacts to things instead of looking past his own fears/worries/enjoyment and doesn't see what that will cost the people around him. His friends are of the same mold so far as well. So will he stay on their level? Leave them behind? Or will they all grow together? Even though I've posted 9 chapters, there hasn't been a lot of growth with anyone. So there is plenty of room for them to grow if they wish to.

Thanks for reading! A very thoughtful review, I think I focused so much on Luke/Jackson that the friends still feel like superficial outlying characters. There are a lot of them to manage and more important characters do need to come to light at this stage in the story. So hopefully, the friends add more depth to Jackson, Luke, etc as I go along, because they are important in the overall story, just not central. Jackson is a character I've been wanting to write for awhile now. I want him to test the boundaries on whether people will like him. I don't want to go 'too far' with that though, but the story is still fairly new and I have a lot of room for him to grow in the next chapters especially. I'm glad you like Luke, he is the only one that deserves to be completely liked at this point. Too bad his mother is a piece of work.. lol. I think in small towns where best friends.. don't really ever stop being best friends, we overlook their flaws/differences or at least get desensitized to them over the years. Cindy and Jackson's mom have known one another since grade school (although I don't think that is mentioned in the story yet) and if you keep a friend that long, you've definitely overlooked and accepted a lot about them by then. lol. I hope you stick with the story though!

Thanks for reading! Luke stood up for himself, probably surprising Jackson a bit I would imagine. Jackson doesn't get a lot of people standing toe to toe with him, or it doesn't seem like that to me. lol. If Connor was willing to take a trash can ride to save face anyway. Maybe Jackson will fix this or revel in a job well done? We'll see. He definitely relapsed though.

Thanks for reading! Some people need a good kick in the butt and Jackson might be one of those people. lol. Hopefully he'll do better, we're into chapter 9 and there has been very minor moments so far. I've never worked with a character that needed a ton of growth like him, I'm glad people think so lowly of him so far, I started this story with that very idea/hope in mind. I just want y'all to stick with him and not go too far with this character flaw.

Happy Birthday!

Thanks for reading! Jackson went back to his old habits to deal with something that - I shouldn't say surprised him, not after that talk they had at the pool. Just ahh, and is there more to what is going on in Jackson's head than 'not' wanting Luke in the same school?

I think if Jackson had you fussing at him, he'd wise up a lot quicker. You said it perfectly.. poor Luke. lol. Hopefully Jackson will surprise us and not be so ass-y. We can all hope right?