Will Hawkins

I remember the moment when my Mother passed. She had been a heart patient much of my youth and when she died it was not a shock, but an expected event. At that moment my Father and I wanted to hold each other, but I couldn't get to him because the nurse who was present wanted to console me and hugged me tightly, keeping me from getting to my Father. I suppose it was only for a moment or so, but I remember thinking, 'Let go of me, lady - I want to hug my Father!"

This series was posted before the to-do about professional football players (American style, not soccer) remaining kneeling during the playing of the Star Spangled Banner. So CJ's reluctance to incorporate the words "under God" into his recitation of the Pledge of Allegiance anticipated a similar reaction among very visible people several years down the road. A very realistic anticipation on your part, Carlos.

Several of your commenters have remarked about the possibility of a CJ\Harley pairing. I believe that the BFF that they have going at this time is an ideal relationship for the two of them, the commenters should remember that Harley is string-straight and is not likely to enjoy a physical relationship with CJ, but they certainly do understand one another's thinking and the time CJ spent on the dairy farm in Wisconsin showed their Bro-affection for one another.

English professor types would have a fit over the use of the word 'prolly', but as far as I am concerned it is typical teen-speak and is appropriate in writing for the boys. Their experience on the Grandparent's farm is wonderfully written. It is a real eye-opening experience for CJ. The facts of gathering the eggs you eat for breakfast and drinking raw milk from a cow you milked yourself are experiences that we city boys never enjoy. I was amazed at the better taste of fresh eggs and milk still warm from a cow when I visited my Grandparents farm many years ago. I learned how to milk and even squirted a shot or two directly from the cow's udder into the open mouth of a cat waiting nearby! I did notice Bret going commando and both boys when they went skinny dipping in the farm pond. Why do we, both men and women, wear clothing to get wet! Skinny dipping is almost the norm in Germany and in the hot springs of Asia and there is little or no sexual innuendo to the practice.

I have been reprimanded for making comments on political candidates in the recent elections so I will refrain from making any at this time. If anyone is interested in which side of the House I sit you are welcome to visit me at The Pit.

The prediction about the problems Venezuela was facing turned out to be very true. Because of the decrease in the selling price of crude oil and the spending of the socialist government of the country, the entire nation was totally bankrupt within two years of the original posting of this chapter and remains so to this day.

I am among the first to say that the design of the Guggenheim is a tour-de-force, but Frank Lloyd Wright is also well known for never designing a structure that did not have major flaws. The small restrooms in the Guggenheim are an example of his absolute inability to consider the utility of the building. As another example, the Waterfall House, a vacation home built in Pennsylvania had no means of being heated except one huge fireplace which warmed the living room but left the bedrooms icy in the winter, it was built on the wrong side of the creek for the owners to be able to enjoy the view and even though the contractor doubled the amount of reinforcing in the floors against FLW's express orders, they still sagged by seven inches and during repairs had to be further reinforced with post-tensioned cables. and the principal rooms of the house were shut off from the view by solid concrete railings four feet high. These are only a few of the conceited errors built into FLW's buildings. Things he was informed about during the design and construction phase but refused to change because they would destroy his design concept.

I am constantly amazed\overwhelmed by your ability to weave all the threads into this story that you do. Each chapter resolves a thread, yes, but adds two more for you to juggle. As a latecomer to the readership, I realize that we are only about 1\4 to 1\3 of the way through the CJ story. There is one hell-of-a-lot of the story with its cliff-hangers and interwoven threads yet to go.

Two times in this series you have complimented those who have served in the military. I remember the 'non-arrest' by an idiot cop near the Iwo Jima memorial and the shit that was dumped on him because of his actions. Using the flag raising monument as a location for the bad actions of the cop was, in its way, a compliment to the armed forces. It showed the obscene actions by a perverted cop could not dim the importance of the memorial to the armed forces. This side story to CJ's tale is another compliment to, in this case, the Marine Corps. Good on you, Carlos!

You are correct, Carlos, about not having teen-aged characters speaking dialog like an English professor, but it was a pleasure to hear a character use 'can' and 'may' correctly! Is it permissible to speak of 'hearing' dialog when it is written into a story? In order to keep all your characters straight (ahem, pun intended) in my mind, Carlos, while reading, I frequently assign an accent to one or another and 'hear' their speech patterns. It has been so many years since I was visiting in Oz that I have a little trouble with the Aussie accent, but Florida, New York, and Chicago are easy for me, and motor-mouth Harley is instantly recognizable!! You and I have a long way to go together, Carlos, with the number of books in the CJ series, but I am enjoying the journey very much, keep up the good work!

I was all ready to get upset over the title to this chapter as a contemporary interpretation of the Bible says that Jesus had brothers and sisters older than He. Then it was made clear that as Jesus was the only son of God the title of the chapter became acceptable. Yes, his mother Mary was considered to be a very young woman at the time of her marriage to Joseph and the birth of Christ -- then where did brothers and sisters come from? It was explained to me that they were Joseph, his earthly father's children by a previous marriage and were according to contemporary naming of relatives, step-brothers. The sermon and the church service was a high point of the chapter and very well handled.

Congratulations Carlos and team. I have been a latecomer to the CJ series, but I have been doubly enjoying the series because of NOT having to wait for each new chapter to post. While, Carlos, you as an author have progressed with each new posting, your team, beta readers, editor, etc. have been working hard at polishing your ideas. To see chapter after chapter posted with few, if any grammatical errors, does my old schoolteacher heart good, and it makes the reading a real pleasure. You are absolutely correct in refusing my suggestions about grammar boo-boos in the dialog. Real people, especially teens do not talk like an English professor. So I will fold my tent and steal silently away. With the scene now changing to Oz, and me being clueless about Aussie slang, I will just have to be more accepting of your character's dialog.

I can agree that the characters about whom an author writes become so well known to him that they are as close or closer than family. With your ability, Carlos, to juggle several storylines in each chapter your writing style really impresses me. Keep up the good work!

I am currently living in Northeast Brazil which is where the majority of the escaped slaves settled after Brazil declared slavery illegal. My little Island of WASP is surrounded by descendants of these escaped slaves. Statistically, 80% of the residents in this area show genetic traces of African natives, so there are many, many African appearing people living in this area. Unfortunately, the latest President of Brazil is attempting to reduce the percentage of this population by throwing them off public lands upon which they have been living ever since the Nineteenth Century. This purge is creating bad feelings among these residents, but then they don't vote or pay land taxes anyway.

Thank you, Carlos, for your comment on my 'Troll Alert'. Many authors bristle at the idea of a non-writer making suggestions about their work so I am somewhat shy about mine. Just remember, the suggestions I may make from time to time are just that, 'suggestions'. The story that appears on my screen is the property of the author and usually, he has gone through the same arduous process that you outlined of rewrite after rewrite and so develops a possessiveness and becomes upset when someone makes a suggestion about correcting an error. Your generosity of spirit is refreshing!

This comment is for information only. There are two possible spellings for the name Thiago. Spelled with an 'h' as it is shown in this sentence the spelling is Brazilian and because the character in this story is said to be from Brazil, that spelling is correct. The continental Portuguese spelling of the name would be Tiago. (my partner is from Portugal and commented on the spelling of the name as his grandson is a 'Tiago'.) The point I am attempting to make in this comment is, although a reader may see the name spelled without the 'h' from time to time, in this case, the author is absolutely correct to spell it as 'Thiago' because of the Brazilian origin of the character. Whew, now I am all out of breath because of that long-winded explanation.

I have the advantage of commenting on this story from several years backsight, (January 2019) and I can see some changes in attitude toward GLBT youth since it was written -- not as many improvements as we would like to see, but some even so. For example, the attitude of the Armed Forces in the US which at the time of writing the original story was just beginning has matured to the point that now the discussion is about accepting transgendered recruits for military service. Note: even at this date, it is still in a discussion phase, no real action contemplated at this time. Any comments I may have on that subject or any similar one will be reserved for The Pit, not expressed here. It is a real pleasure to watch the development of CJ's character as these chapters move ahead. At this point in his life, he is beginning to develop the opinions that will become integrated into his character in the future. I believe he will always be an iconoclast especially with the support he is receiving from his fathers and friends, but even at this tender age, he has been, with a few outstanding exceptions, polite about his opinions. His attending Walls is an excellent step in his maturation and his motor-mouth friend, Harley, will be a real foil whom the author can use to highlight CJ's growing abilities. Superior characterization, Carlos.

I was going to comment but decided not to

I think CJ could be a shoe in.” - I think CJ could be a shoo-in.” This expression purportedly comes from the practice of corrupt jockeys holding their horses back and shooing a preselected winner across the finish line to guarantee that it will win. A “shoo-in” is now an easy winner, with no connotation of dishonesty. “Shoe-in” is a common misspelling. We now know the "Ginger's" name is Ian. I suppose we will find out more about him subsequently. Nathan's desire to be a campaign manager for CJ is oddly prophetic, isn't it?

the closest person to my age I now - the closest person to my age I know think the kid compete if he wanted to ??????? they each other a bit better - they knew each other a bit better

I don't know whether you are still reading comments in re this story because quite some time has passed since it was first posted, but just in case you are, you have hooked a new reader, my friend. By the time a story reaches this period in its history many authors are so sick of it they just want to put it on the shelf. I hope this is not the case with you. If a story is well written it is worth reading again and again. So far the story scans well, by that I mean the tempo of the writing is just great. It keeps the reader interested but moves along apace. I have the advantage of not having to wait several days for the next episode to be published, but there are many readers out here in Reader Land who can only speak about their impatience for the next chapter to be posted. For several reasons, my advice to you is to accept their urgings with good grace as their eagerness is only a reflection of their interest and excitement. They may be unaware of the rules about posting by the administration of GA, so just smile and know that now that the postings are complete everyone including the author can relax a little. I, for one, intend to sit back and enjoy!!!!!

Very well, Ace. I will cease reading this story immediately and move on to those authors who are more receptive to suggestions. I have found in my reading on GA That there are many author-editor teams which appreciate well-meaning suggestions. Time after time I have seen grammatical errors, usually homophones, in stories that have been edited and read by beta readers as well as having gone through re-reading by the author many times in which a 'fresh eye' has discovered grammatical errors. Thank you for catching me up so early in the reading process, I will spend my efforts where they are better accepted.

You will be dining with my employer and I tonight - You will be dining with my employer and me tonight

Though I feel that whatever story by C James I am currently reading, is my favorite, I would have to say that Circumnavigation is my all-time favorite, probably because it was the first one I read and also my introduction to the treasure chest of stories on GA. We always remember our 'first time' with a rosy aura, don't we?

I am going to repeat something I have said about your writing elsewhere, CJ. You have an encyclopedic mind for covering all the details -- and your research is impeccable. I mentioned that Circumnavigation was the first story I ever read on GA and I found the same high quality of research in that story as well. When you write about a location or a person, you make the reader be there as a presence. I assume that some of those plaudits need to be directed toward your editorial staff and beta readers as well, but you are the heart and soul of the story. Congratulations.