BryanC

Can't really blame him, there. The idea of knowing that you're own a ticking clock isn't so much of a mystery, but knowing it's running a little fast? Yeah, that's life changing. Tad's multi-faceted curtain call -- the Graphic Novel and Christopher and Nate. A heart-felt legacy. I know from first hand experience that leaving can be a story unto itself.

From my point of view the difference is the narrative: Pornographic Fiction is sloppy, course, and has no other intent than a few strokes, one character describing themselves, wrinkle for wrinkle, pube for pube, drop the Kleenex in the waste basket; then there's Erotic Fiction that blends the drama of the day to day in with the sexual narrative, to the point that it seems organic, interesting, and real. Empathizing with the plight of the characters. I prefer the latter. Stories like these are the latter. I felt -- maybe read into this chapter -- the growing sense of urgency of Tad. His uncertainty, somewhat absent last chapter, is present here. It reads as if he's worried of being there when the book is published, his desire to finish the book so it can be published. Then the fatigue scare. I'm not surprised that he chose to not tell Christopher or Nate. Fictional character or not, this feels like this is going to be the slow, painful exhaustion for Tad, and the equally painful coming to terms for Christopher and Nate? Again, maybe I'm reading too much into it. Markus is in a dark place. I recognize that place, and he needs a way through and out. His part in the grander scheme of things has been small, but no less commanding, for me. Sometimes the light is as simple as packing your things, turning the key, telling the past to F!@k Off(!), and drive to greener pastures. Finding the light is also a spectrum. I just really want him to make it through and out of the quagmire of doubt and self-loathing he's in. It's never easy, when that's all you've known, but still. In closing, the further explanation of the graphic novel: I like books that let the images explain the story... by that, they really let the reader/viewer see themselves through those images. Not what they can't have, but what might be waiting for them. If the artist gives his hope to his art, then the viewer can feel that hope. Tad is the Red-Tailed Hawk here. (Red-Tailed Hawks are totems for lifelong love, of self, romantic, community, and hope). Great chapter, Wayne. *peace!*

Based on an earlier comment, one of the first things that went through my mind when Tad proposed publishing, selling locally, and doing a book signing, then Markus having such unfortunate issues arise with his family; I hoped that he'd be there for that book signing... that or ordering a copy that had a posthumous thank you note. There's nothing like a first hand encounter with a spirit like Tad's though. Our trio is the center and everything, but I want Markus to win. Too many people fall to the lame bullshit his family and community has effectively laid on him his whole life. To quote a movie, "He deserves Wow!".

Great read! I can't say it's nice to read about someone' insecurities, but that's the balance, right? You can't accept something unless you're uncertain of it first. Kent and Stanley are probably how the majority of LGBT couples approach relationships. You look over your shoulder at first, you hear the echoes of past voices -- good and bad, and you ultimately rely on each other to turn your attention back to one another. Creating the Graphic Novel has turned out to be a great plot device. Its also a great way of communicating to a large demographic of people. That has a special place in my heart, whenever we arrive at those moments. Kind of rambling, but this a great chapter. Looking forward to Sunday.

A concept that you've now introduced into two of your works -- you referred to Stanly's home a small home: Tiny houses. I want to commend you for using that housing concept. It still gets a lot of scoff, but it's such a practical and efficient style of home. Its cool elements like those that make these so great to read.

Sorry for the abbreviated nature of this comment. Great chapter with a lot of great content. I'm down to catch up with everyone a little later hopefully. Great reading!

Sometimes it's innate. Progress is showing in the larger cities of some states, but smaller communities are still mired, horrifically mired in a lot of cases, in the tired, old, backwards way by their own propagation of those ways. With a family like Markus', it can take a lot not to hate yourself. It can also take a lot of being told that you're loved; not especially because you're gay, or because you're gay, but you're a great guy, and another great guy loves the hell out of you because you are who you are. I get that there's a sad ending to this in one way, but I hope there isn't a sad plot twist with Markus, too.

That second paragraph you wrote is a great premise for a fever dream version of things without Tad. People that are selflessly kind wind up being the center without even knowing it. That's part of their magic... Their nature. As morbid as it might sound, after his passing, the other characters considering the possibilities of where they might be if they hadn't met Tad? I'd read it. Thought Markus might be headed to town! Looking forward to what you've got in store for him. Thanks! I'm actually sitting with a sick relative -- well, waiting while a battery of tests are being performed. I'd like to pass the luck along to them if it's OK? Cya next chapter!

The irony of reading about a hospital visit from a hospital room -- Wow! This is like a Magritte painting. Romantic couples of three people have been referred to as a "V" since arcane times, because certain sectors have always judged and hated, and the letter was easy to hide in plain sight, and incorporate if the relationship was being discussed in a missive. The term has been revived in more recent times. Its kind of cool, the meaning behind "V" in this context: the apex of the "V" is always described as the core/center of the relationship (In this case, Tad), and the arms as literally the loving arms (Chris and Nate). Also, since the Renaissance, and the need for ... secrecy ... , the merging of mathematics and art, "V", as an unwritten rule, symbolized "Truth". That aspect was incorporated into the romantic nature of of discussing "V". True love. Not going to lie. Miss an update on Marcus. Great chapter Wayne!

Definitely. Family exerts a gravity that can be hard to defy.

When Tad was first introduced -- close-fitting knit cap, short hair -- I thought immediately of a cousin I had. Of all the people in my very hard and closed-off family, he was the most caring and loving. He was the first person in my family to hug me -- not remotely kidding, there. I was six years old. I remember telling him that I didn't think it was right, and there the conversation about why it was. He was the first person to tell me he loved me. From that point on, when he arrived or left when visiting, he always hugged and offered his love. When I was seventeen -- he was twenty three -- he was diagnosed with an advanced type of Leukemia. The prognosis was that he would live only a few months, but he fought and fought. He never lost his smile and his caring nature. Though, like you said of your cousin, he had moments of despair and depression. He went into remission a little over a year later, started getting healthy again. When his hair was first coming back, after all the chemo, he wore a indigo knit cap everywhere, snugged down tight. His blonde hair looking like a buzz, and he kept it that way for the rest of his time. Not long after, he was at the gym, and fell. The initial Dx was a severe pulled muscle, but when they got his blood-work back, it was the Leukemia again. They hoped that if he could beat it once... His system crashed and he went down fast. I only got to see him twice before he died. He was wearing his smile. He would place people's hands together, and tell them never to forget, always to love. We gave each other a hug, and, yeah, we told each other that we loved one another before leaving on the first of those visits. Those were the last words I heard him speak. I've always been into art. When we were younger, we went with his family to see Clash of The Titans. When we got back to his home, we were gathered around the table. I watched as he drew Perseus holding the reigns of Pegasus. ... Well, when Tad opened his tablet and began drawing... Like you said, you can't forget the pain, but that damned sure isn't the legacy they left. It's the love and kindness.

I wanted to offer a little bit of clarity to my earlier comment. ... This is fiction, right? ... Yeah, Fiction... Though, the situations are certainly founded in reality. I never doubted the love that Nate felt for Tad, or Tad for Nate -- before or after the afternoon's roller-coaster ride. It was the complexity of the situation that seemed to come home on the shoulders of all three characters.

I had a similar situation play out with father, but he and the situation turned into something ... no other word for it: ugly. Sometimes there's no going back after a certain level of hate.

Kent deserves his happiness. Marcus dipped his toe in the pool of Coming Out and found it selfishly cold. Tad, Nate, and Chris. Was Nate the unexpected angel Tad needed to find for Tad, or is he the angel he's hoping would be there for Christopher when the worst thing happens? Or both? Was it selflessness alone, or was it selflessness coupled with relief?... Emotionally conflicted over that closing... Thought provoking. Well written.

Same here!

I like the time jump. I was partly expecting an interlude of conversation, discovery and/or disclosure between Ian and his classmates/family. The weaving of chess dynamics, mathematics, logistics, music, art into the uncertainty of life and love, makes this such a potent read! I really can't get enough of the prose and subject matter. The way you're illustrating the characters, the scenes; it's quite wonderful. Great chapter! An Eternal Golden Braid; great book by the way. A quote by Douglas R. Hofstadter: "Why is some music so much deeper and more beautiful than other music? It is because form, in music, is expressive–expressive to some strange subconscious regions of our minds. The sounds of music do not refer to serfs or city-states, but they do trigger clouds of emotion in our innermost selves; in that sense musical meaning IS dependent on intangible links from symbols to things in the world–those 'things', in this case, being secret software structures in our minds." via goodreads.

You hit on the third act we're all hoping for (and NOT hoping for, as Tad's such a great character), I think.

Can I just add that beards are sexy as hell? That scene was quite erotic, even for the characters! A well groomed, edged, and/or edgy facial sculpt; that's a turn on. ... Of course, my grandfather -- his face shaved smooth for as long as I can remember -- laid down the knowledge of the ages when he noticed me beginning to grow a beard in my teens: "Only a man's crazy enough to grow, cultivate, and groom something on his face that grows wild on his ass." He added the caveat of a wink and a grin, though. I think he approved.

Freud said, "The only unnatural sex act is [having] none at all." ... beyond that it's just preference. Most authors that write Dominant/submissive plots either don't really understand it, and therein ruin their story, or are writing for those who enjoy their reading one-handed. Being culturally taboo to most, they revel in it, like a drug, instead of flowing with it. I really like that you've presented this particular sexual preference as an intimate one, shared lovingly between two people that just happen to dig it. You write well when speaking for and from multiple perspectives. Tad, Chris, and Nate are the nexus, but the other's feel homogeneous with what's happening around them. That's one of the reasons I keep coming back when you mention that you're working on something new: you never disappoint. Still curious how Marcus and Thomas will fit in the scheme of things. They say the eye of the storm is the calm, but I have a feeling a lot of activity is on the horizon for our three in the eye? Great chapter, sir!

Not at all. The characters, at the opening the first chapter, Tad, Miranda, and Christopher were the only ones associated with one another. The others, aside from Nate maybe, were tangential, but that changed quickly. Maybe I'm reading too much into it, but it felt like Nate had more than a passing interest in Tad from the opening chapter. He seemed genuinely intrigued with what was happening above the belt, too. Anyways, that's all I was referring to with the "disparate" comment.

I agree. They seem to be the nexus on the story.

The story began with all these disparate characters, and slowly, the Red Thread is being snugged up and we're seeing the connections. There's a deep sadness in this one: each character revealing their truest feelings about themselves and those closest to them, their personal fears, and they're baring themselves in the rawest of emotions. You have a gift of swinging focus, Wayne. That said, it's difficult not to see a path this one could take. There's a confluence of emotions in that one; knowing you can't stop what's going to happen; everyone wants everyone to find love and be happy; and the Tinman, who wasn't sure he had a heart. suddenly discovers he does, while the other characters are looping themselves in. For a number of reasons, despite of or maybe because of the intense emotional content, this is probably my favorite story of yours to date. Also, this one is stirring a great deal of introspection.

Gut punch.