James Carnarvon

A great portrait of how a child's trauma is shared by by loving parents, who would gladly take it on themselves if it would spare their child the hurt. Meanwhile, James' troubled emotions draw Casper in like a beacon. I like that we are reminded how the world has changed for James - he feels safer with his back to a wall. But he is still capable of kindness and generosity.

Public places could be deafening if you were an empath and lacked the ability to fully control the ability. I wouldn't want to be Casper. I like Casper - he seems gentle; I'm less keen on Tasha, although I have some hope that a positive influence may help her to make better choices. Naturally, though, I'm keen to learn more about how things are going with James... "the smells of car exhaust and recent rain" - I like this kind of sensory imagery.

I started reading this story back in March, but I got distracted by my own writing project. Now I'm done with that, I'm starting over with reading yours. You've already published a lot of chapters! I have to hand it to you for being able to develop a story of such a length. The prologue is a very effective introduction. It introduces James' recent backstory very effectively without having to dramatise the assault itself, which would be a horrific way to start. The conversation between James and Doctor Sharpe also gives us a pretty good idea of the emotional impact the assault has had on our hero. I like the way the more otherworldly elements (the marks of purity and pain) are introduced in a very matter-of-fact way as a normal aspect of life in the world you are creating. Most effective, though, are the sinister implications of the therapist's opening notes. If you're not paying attention, you could miss them. James thinks he's just visiting another psychotherapist concerned with his wellbeing, but Doctor Sharpe, although also concerned for his welfare, seems to be serving another agenda. An intriguing start.

I should add that I draw on my own experience as a relatively non-stroppy (but still messed-up) teenager. They do exist. Also, stroppiness in teens comes of attachment and security to some extent. Neither of my main point of view characters have typical relationships with their parental care-givers (although I wouldn’t say that applied to me). Gianni is on egg-shells with his grandparents much of the time. Toto is actively trying to repair a distant and fractured relationship with his father. I do think the more inclusive Italian attitude to children may support more rounded behaviour, but Italians can also be an emotive and bolshy lot. I don’t profess to be a total expert.

No, I’m sure that’s a fair comment and thank you for giving it. Italian teens are not automatically more mature than American teens or British teens for that matter, although the family dynamics might be slightly different. I’m sure this is a fairly common malady in teenage characters written by adults. In trying not to underestimate an intelligent teen’s potential as a character, and in trying to make them relatable and sympathetic, some classic teenage behaviours can be lost. What I do try to do is capture the confusion, self-doubt and strongly felt emotions of the age.

Thank you @drsawzall - your comments throughout have been greatly appreciated.

That's a great fact. Any parallel with my story is entirely coincidental! I do know that they live almost their entire lives on the wing.

While I'm here, a big thank you to @Ivor Slipper, @drpaladin and @travlbug for commenting on every chapter and filling me with positive energy! Thanks in advance to anyone else who has done the same.

I have a potential real-world commission for a piece of non-fiction writing of local interest only, completely unrelated to my work at GA, which would be my first bit of paid work as a writer (outside of my day job). I also had an idea for a silly little one-shot spin-off of this story, but it probably won't amount to anything. As far as major new gay stories go...? I'll have to wait for inspiration to strike. I always seem to be left with at least one character I could explore further (in this case, Dani seems the obvious choice), but I would worry about any further stories set in this location becoming repetitive. I'd like to write a children's novel, just an adventure story without the gay aspect.

So, there we are...! If you've enjoyed my story, please do leave a comment... and consider posting a review once you've allowed it all to sink in. For anyone who's curious, I've added a page about influences and locations (including some photos) to my author page: https://jamescarnarvon.home.blog/influences-and-locations/

Toto and Michele hurried down Via Roma, their feet pounding the crazy paving, passing closed shopfronts until they reached Toto’s father’s store. Ahead of them, they could see Claudia running on down the street towards Da Rossi. Salvatore was getting ready to close up for the night as they arrived, and he was taking in the last of the outdoor displays. He looked up in surprise at the sight of two anxious boys arriving on his doorstep. “Papà,” Toto panted, “we need your help.” “Wha

You don't really think I was trying to sell you that idea, do you? 😨 It was meant to represent the desire to save someone you care about, and how Angelo knows better than most that time could be of the essence.

Good call! To be honest, I struggled a bit with this chapter. I could have done with having a bit more dramatic material left to cover, and it became more of a final victory loop for the ensemble. I hope you enjoy tomorrow's payoff!

So, just one more chapter to go... 😢 I will post the final part of the story tomorrow.

“So it’s true, then?” They were in the cathedral square. Claudia was perched against the railings, the distant hillside of Scala spread out behind her, her dark eyes demanding answers. Above them, the cicadas chattered away in the umbrella pines. Toto and Michele stood facing her, side by side in the shade of the trees. “Yeah, it’s true,” Toto replied. “We’re really together.” Claudia turned sharply to his companion. “Michele?” Michele nodded. “It’s just like Toto said.”

All right, since you were brave enough to give it a go, here's my take on Toto. Toto has a high level of 'learned' self-sufficiency and independence as a result of being brought up by a physically and emotionally unavailable single father. Too much self-sufficiency in a child is not a good thing. However, in Toto's case, the damage is offset by other aspects of his upbringing. Toto's caring side can be explained by a number of other social and environmental factors. He has grown up in small-town Italy, an environment in which children are welcomed and valued as a part of adult society. Over his life he will have experienced and witnessed many transient acts of kindness within the community; for example, the time when, as a little boy, he falls from his bike and badly skins his knee, and is immediately helped by Angelo and Gianni. He has also grown up in the constant company of a gentle and caring best friend with loving parents, giving him plenty of positive role models. I'm also sure that Salvatore has played his part in teaching Toto a sense of justice and a sense of right and wrong. Plus there are the bred-in aspects of his basic, fundamental nature, and the love he will have received in his barely-remembered early years. Toto initially inherits some of Salvatore's lingering prejudices, but these are shocked away when he discovers his own sexuality and receives a massive injection of positive energy from Gianni, Angelo and Claudia at a key formative age. Toto is not totally gentle like Michele and Daniele, but he has grown up with a good heart. How's that for an explanation? 🙃

That's a fair question. I do sort of have an answer, but it might be a bit muddled if I tried to spell it out!

In an ideal world, we'd all do that!

I don't think he felt he could manage that on his own. I sort of know how he feels.

Toto returned home that night giddy with the evening he had just experienced. When they finally decided to part company for the night, Toto had offered to walk Michele home so he could collect his Vespa scooter. Michele suggested that they carry on down the path from the viewpoint, as it offered them a major shortcut on the way there. However, they also knew that a large part of the path was unlit and treacherous. There was much giggling as they fumbled around in the dark, bumping into

You're too kind, thank you. To be honest I had my doubts about that last line - I thought the metaphor might be a bit heavy-handed - but I'm glad you both liked it. I always finish writing a story before I begin to share it, but I've carried on doing some editing as I post the chapters. I've just finished a third or fourth edit on chapter 10. We really are approaching the home straight now.

A few days later, another sunny morning found Toto lying on the grass of the formal gardens outside the town’s small Municipio on the hill behind the cathedral. Hands behind his head, he was watching a lone, fluffy cloud scudding gently across the sky between the canopies of two enormous pines. He was surrounded by beds of colourful geraniums. The two girls who were with him were also sprawled on the ground nearby, talking cheerfully. “Are you serious, Bella?” Claudia was saying. “Do you re

@drsawzall Thank you for accidentally drawing my attention to a repeated word ('hopefully'). Maybe this chapter could have used another pass in editing!

Neither Toto nor Michele felt like telling the world just yet. They returned to the party, slipping back in largely unnoticed, and tried to act normally, at least until Claudia buttonholed them in a corner. Daniele hovered a couple of metres away, equally eager to hear what was going on. “Well?” Claudia asked. Toto and Michele exchanged a glance. “We… we’ll let you know,” Toto said. Claudia spread her arms impatiently. “That’s it? You’ve got to give me more than that!” T

As Angelo said way back when he and Gianni first met, “half the places in this town are named after saints”. You’ll find streets in Ravello named after San’ or Santa Chiara, Barbara, Giovanni, Francesco, Martino, Trifone, Pietro, Cosma to name a few. ‘Chiara’ is just the Italian form of ‘Claire’. I believe the origin of the name may have something to do with ‘light’.