TheZot

Heh, yeah, Justin was a bit wittier than perhaps would be normal for folks with Aspergers. He wasn't entirely out of the norm -- I know an awful lot of folks with some form of it or another (joys of being a professional computer geek. AS is, as you might expect, awfully common in my profession) and there are the occasional flashes of wit that come out, depending on circumstance and personal proclivities. Tends to only happen when folks are comfortable with the people they're around so the awkwardness goes away, more or less. I tried to make sure most of Justin's wit was either half-awkward (like the my god, I'm a juggler! bit, which was arguably kinda insulting) or practiced (like the banter between Justin and Steph at the cast party, which they'd done before). Unfortunately I did lose hold of some of the important characterization bits at times. Not too badly, but there's always that itch to fix one more thing. I'm not sure when the sequel will be out. I've been puttering with it, but unfortunately other things have been getting in the way. I really oughta set up an RSS feed or something for this stuf...

I'm not entirely sure which is the worse thing, the fact that iTunes has an unnatural fondness for the KMFDM in my music library, or that I find it fits my mood. One or the other's probably worrisome. At least it's interspersing Evanescence occasionally, just for a change of pace.

Not necessarily the usual fare here, but yesterday I put up Firegrass, a fairly traditional (well, sorta) Sword & Sorcery story. This piece has a number of things that are new for me -- it's third person, relatively short (only about 16K words), plot rather than character driven, and I was working on setting and action description. No boinking, alas, but you can't have everything. If you're a fan of the genre, I'd much appreciate a read-through and commentary. This is the first in a series of stories of varying lengths featuring these two characters pretty much in the same style (and certainly in the same setting) so feedback on both the good and bad bits would be greatly appreciated -- it's one of the things that helps us authors get better.

Yesterday was, on the whole, a crap day. Which was kind of strange, because it was also weirdly productive. The crap part was entirely personal, as we took my dog to the vets and had her euthanized last night. This wasn't something that was unexpected -- she was 16 and had a slowly progressing neurodegenerative problem that was destroying the myelin sheathing around her nerves, and over the weekend we hit the point where she had no control in her hind end and only spotty bladder and bowel control. She was happy and all, but... it was just time. That doesn't make it any better, but she'd already cheated death more often than a hero in a horror movie. You only get to do that so many times. The productive part was what surprised me -- I did most of the editing of Firegrass, which I finished up and posted this afternoon. That story stars Ben and William, a pair I've posted snippets from here, and will probably post more of at some point later. (And big thanks to Dio and Jason (who'll probably never see he's been thanked here ) for editing) It's easier to rewrite when half your brain's not working, or so it seems. Go figure. The other productive part was the plotting out of a whole series of short stories, in the tradition of the old pulp fiction action/science hero -- guys like Flash Gordon or Doc Savage. It's a genre that's desperately homoerotic (come on, you can't say otherwise. Strapping muscular action hero who always gets captured, tied up, and 'tortured' by the bad guy, and who's in an unconsumated relationship with his virginal girlfriend? That just screams... well, you can fill in the blanks) and I'd been batting around an idea or two for a while, courtesy of Snowy and Jonathan Coulton, whose song "Skullcrusher Mountain" is an absolute classic. It all pretty much fell into place, though, what with all the turnoil and all. Dunno if it'll go anywhere, as it's not like I've got much time to write what I've already started, let alone more stuff, but... Oh, and if anyone's got any ideas for appropriately, erm, double entendre-suggesting names for pulp fiction heroes or villains, I'm definitely interested.

The first thing that sprung to mind for me was Milo Bloom from Bloom County, but he's more of a musician than an artist...

Mmm, awkward silences are always fun. It'll be interesting to see how things pan out, since odds are I'll be significantly older than most of the other people in the class. Who knows, depending on when I may end up trotting out some of the straight romance novel I'm supposed to be writing for work. (Which is a long story in itself) Probably not, though, that'd be less fun.

Or "On the nature of writing". Or something like that. I figured it was time to stop just bitching about the things in my writing I'm not happy about and actually start doing something about it. It's too late in the semester to sign up for a writing class at the local community college, but it's never too late to read about writing, so I've started. A while back I picked up a copy of "Characters and Viewpoint" by Orson Scott Card (on the recommendation of The Pecman, who wrote the stories "Groovy kind of love" and "Jagged angel" -- I don't have links handy but they're both on nifty) and poked through it some. Last night I picked up a copy of "Description & Setting" by Ron Rozelle. (Along with a copy of Applied Cryptography -- must've looked a little odd to the cashier, and I can't wait to have to explain it to the IRS since they're both legitimate business expenses) It was in the same series as the OSC book, so I figured it was a good bet. So far... yep, looks like it. Plus there's a certain amusing symmetry to writing about reading about writing. (Which leaves people reading about me writing about reading about writing, and we all go 'round oroboros-like. Or get confused. Possibly both) Regardless, it's been worthwhile, even the bits and pieces I've dug into. I can't say whether these books in particular would be good for anyone who wants to get better as a writer, they've certainly been good for me, and I can recommend books in general for folks that're serious about getting better. Who knows, at this rate I'll probably end up joining some writer's group or other by the end of the summer. That could certainly make group read-throughs.... interesting.

Isn't family fun? Congrats on standing up for yourself. That can be amazingly difficult, something that takes some people a very long time to do, if they ever manage. You certainly know your family better than we do, and have a better idea of how they'll react (though families can surprise you in very pleasant ways), so it's worth thinking about the things that might be a problem when you tell 'em. From what you've said, I'd bet you've got the twin "family name" and "kids" things hanging over you. Do you want kids? Yeah, I know, you're young and all, but I knew I wanted kids when I was in high school, long before I gave any thought to who I'd have 'em with, so it's not too soon to think about. There's a knee-jerk "gay = no kids" reaction that a lot of people, gay and straight, have, but that just doesn't have to be the case. I certainly wouldn't recommend marrying a woman if you do (I would actually recommend finding a nice guy, settling down, and getting married, but I'm kinda traditional that way) but there are a number of different ways to have kids. Sure, it's more problematic, but definitely doable. If you want kids, the family name thing actually becomes easier. You wouldn't necessarily want to hold it over 'em (You know, "I want kids, but they don't have to have my name..." type stuff) but it is there as a handy retort. On the other hand it may not be necessary, and that'd be cool too. However it goes, good luck. -Dan

Nah, Justin's really not the college type. Despite having clever parents he's at best of average intellegence, and really not a good student by temperament. (I tried to get that across in the story but I fear I didn't as well as I wanted to - Justin was struggling a bit in school and had to work really hard for the B-minuses he scraped by with) He's a physical kind of guy and they just don't teach the sorts of things he'd take to in college. Well, unless you went in for a degree in kinesthiology, and since he's not really a football type I'm not seeing that. Besides, despite the tendency to turn college into just grades 13-16 these days (which is a rant for another day) the things Justin's interested in don't need college degrees for. He'd be happy being, say, a plumber or working construction or something like that, and there's a pretty good chance that Rob really wouldn't care. It's actually kind of funny to think of Justin as a house-husband trying to ride herd over a few kids, but I think I'll pass on that for now. I think. Probably, at least. Anyway, now I'm definitely intrigued, and since these things'll be short (4-7K words) little things, I think I'm gonna have to, just because.

So I finished the draft for the story that I've been currently blocking on (if you were in chat the other night you got to see me ambush Dio and Myr -- sorry guys. And no, the Jell-o pictures will never see the light of day ever! ) and sent it away to be poked at by folks who're good at poking things. I've already gone and fiddled with my index page to give it a spot, along with teasing about a few other stories in the same series that are in a sufficient state to figure they will be done, even if they're not done now. That's kinda got me thinking about Yankee and Rob and Justin. I've got the sequel pretty much plotted out, though I need to do some research before I can really write most of it (I need to kill someone off slowly) and I do need to let it gel a little more before I can start banging out draft text. Still... there's the story that comes after, since Carpe DIem is going to be Rob's story, not Justin or Rob and Justin's. And it's the after story that I'm finding interesting. Not after as in "what happens senior year in highschool", since there's going to be gale-force handwaving on that -- there's no way I'm going to even try touching on writing what it's like to be an out gay couple in a rural Georgia high school. Uh uh, no way, not a chance. Rather, "what happens when they go off to college and beyond" sorts of things. I mean, assuming they make it (which is itself a big assumption, between Justin's AS and Rob's issues and tendencies towards being closed-off and introspective -- having one partner who can't read people and another who tends not to talk about what's wrong isn't a recipe for an easy relationship) what happens? What does Rob do? What does Justin do? How's college go? Do they go to college? Rob should, sure, he's smart and talented in ways that higher education is good for, and we've established that he wants to go to art school, but... what about Justin? He's an adequate student at best and the things he's good at don't really warrant college. He'd be better off training and opening a dojo or working with someone who already has one, or maybe doing stage choreography, or working as a bouncer. (Can you see Justin as a waiter in a gay bar? He'd be safe, certainly, and it's not like Rob would have to worry about him straying, since it'd never actually occur to him) And, of course, there's always the important question "What about the broccoli?" Which is, itself, a story I'll never tell. With that, there's also plot. If there's a full-fledged story, rather than a series of scenes from a life (which works too) what the heck should it be? What could happen that'd be reasonable and allow an actual story to weave around it? Hell, it's half-tempting to go all wacky and have Strange Things happen to them. Maybe in the jungles of Peru where Rob's on an archeological dig or something, with Justin along for grunt help. Could catapult them into some odd fantasy realm if I was feeling nasty. Probably not, though Justin would think Rob was hot in an Indiana Jones getup. Decisons, decisions. I think I'm gonna have to start puttering with little vignettes and throwing 'em up to read, just for fun.

Well, y'know, we always bitch and moan about the stuff we can't do rather than be happy with the stuff we can. Or maybe that's just me, I dunno. One thing I have noticed is that the projects I take on always seem to be just one step past where I'm comfortable. Not a bad thing, I suppose -- I'm not going to get better at what I do if I don't stretch when I'm doing it. That doesn't necessarily make it comfortable, of course, but that's a different thing entirely.

And I just can't get the !@#$ thing expressed right on paper. Or screen. Whatever. You know, actually written in writing. I hate that. This may be the biggest problem I have as a writer, actually getting into words the things I see in my head. I can't draw them, so all I can do is describe them, and, well, words just fail me. Or I fail them. Something like that. Feelings I can do, I can manage mildly poetic cadence that'll carry you along, and I'm pretty sure I can amuse, but damn me if I can't describe. This is something that, right now, is seriously pissing me off. I seem to be waffling between text that's far too sparse to give a good picture of what's going on and text that's detailed enough to get in the way of the action of the story. I can't strike the balance, not the way I want to. Dammit, this whole "writing" thing is a massive pain in the ass. I don't seem to be getting the hang of fast-paced action stories. That's probably a sign I need to take a writing course or three at the local community college, or read some books on writing, or both. Neither of which I can do in time to make me happy with the text I'm frowning at on screen right now. Bleah. It's so much easier to read this stuff than write it.

I dunno here. On the one hand, yeah, abuse is a Bad Thing, and if Chaz was doing that I think she's OK to make a stink about it even if you don't like it. (Given the way most abusive situations seem to go, they seem pretty obligatory for the abusee to even come anywhere near acknowledging what's going on) On the other, from the descriptions you and Chaz have given, Chaz wasn't hitting you -- he was in a fistfight with his brother and you got in the way. That's a very different thing indeed, and if that's accurate Selene's definitely over-reacting.

Well, we'll see how it goes for Martin. The toughest part so far is to keep everyone's behaviour realistic without turning anyone into a villain. (Which is one of the cliches I hate in these sorts of stories -- the wife goes from reasonable to utter ogre, and while I know that happens more often than one might like, it's a cheap out for an author, and lets you dodge dealing with some of the more uncomfortable bits) I probably ought to talk less about the story and write more. I think I shall, since I'm unfortunately inspired this morning. -Dan

Y'know, you worry me some days, Connor -- looking forward to an unhappy story and all. And don't worry, Lucy. It works out OK, and next time you're outside don't forget to wave to the OMCL... Seriously, I understand your reluctance to read stories with married guys in them. In most cases the guys behave in ways I find distasteful, or it doesn't work out in ways that are even remotely realistic, or something. Plus there's the guaranteed pain woven in. This story's not going on Nifty, for whatever that's worth; it's staying here on GA. (And yes, I've learned the ancient art of the semicolon! Fear my mighty punctuating power! Bwahahahaha! Ahem. Nevermind...) It's one of those "have to write" stories rather than "want to write" stories. I'm OK if nobody ever reads it, in ways I wasn't with Yankee. If people do then that's cool. I'd leave it on the hard drive here, but publishing it adds that one extra little push that puts it over into catharsis, so... -Dan

Sunshine and puppies do get in the way of deep disscussion, this is true. And as someone pointed out, everything is in one way or another connected. That doesn't mean that any place you happen to be is the appropriate place to discuss everything. Most, arguably all, venues have appropriate and inappropriate subjects. There's nothing wrong with that; having and knowing the boundaries both gives structure and a sense of safety to the people involved. Work, class, on the subway, in the carpool van, on the subway -- every place you're at has an implied set of OK and not OK subjects for discussion, which generally tie into the actual purpose of the place you're at, and that's fine. The point of your Calc II class is calculus. Discussions of women's rights in third world countries are inappropriate there, and get in the way of the explicit purpose of the class. GA is here to discuss fiction and to a lesser extent provide a safe space for people to deal with the personal issues that arise because of their same-sex attractions. We could talk about corn futures, Phillipine politics, desktop fusion research, and the myriad of religious and political issues that surround being gay, but the problem is that those subjects are either way off-topic or they generate enough smoke and heat to get in the way of the purpose of GA. Worse, the bitterness that erupts (and it will. Hell, it already has) drives away the people who actually want to discuss the fiction and worse still it drives away the people who could actually get some help from being here. That's not to say that the discussions themselves are wrong, because they're not. Just that here is the wrong place to have them. If you want to have those discussions the right way to have 'em here is in the context of a piece of fiction. Write some (or find some) that explores the issues you want to bring up then, in the context of that piece, discuss them. It won't be a general discussion, rather one that relates to the opinion expressed in a story, but that's OK, as it tends to give everyone enough distance from the touchy subjects to be able to work things out relatively calmly. -Dan

Heh. Poor Justin, nobody can remember his name. The sequel's entirely Rob's story. Justin comes into it since he really can't not, but he doesn't actually appear in all that much of the story. Which is fine, it seems to work OK anyway.

I'm on the member's page, along with Dio and KenderCleric. Yankee's in the efiction site mostly for completeness -- I'd thrown a couple of chapters in there to help test the software when Myr was getting it settled in, and put the rest of the chapters in because I didn't want to leave it half-finished in there. (Plus someone had asked if I had the whole thing as a single file, and that was the easiest way to get it)

Woohoo! Yeah, stupid though it may sound, one of the things that's been holding me up on the sequel to Yankee (besides work, other writing commitments, the straight romance novel, family time, and a serious attempt to make things good with my wife) is the title. I've been calling it "Yankee II" but, let's be honest, as a title that stinks. (Granted, there are worse, but who wants worse than that?) The title helps me, since it mostly sums up the story, at least until it's got enough traction for the text to stand on its own. Well, I finally figured it out, after batting around more of the outline for the thing this afternoon. (And yep, that means it's mostly plotted, though going from a working plot outline to actual text isn't entirely trivial for non-fluff pieces) I was thinking I could call it "Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we may die," but that's too long. Nice, but too long. Instead, Yankee's sequel is gonna be called... Carpe Diem (Yes, I did count characters to force the title off the summary page. Why do you ask? )

Aw, c'mon, that may well not be the case. You're young still, and while kids the 'traditional' way (with wife in tow) better not happen, if you want kids they're a real option for you. Don't go ruling it out just because you're gay. (I'll spare you the rant, but seriously -- if you want kids, you can and should have kids)

Martin's already in hell. The first few chapters I get to sketch out exactly how bad. Mmmm, what fun! Or, y'know, not. Heh. I'm just your average freelance computer geek, and I can get all shouty with the people I work with if I have to. None of this gets drawn from work, alas. Martin does ultimately end up OK. Not storybook happy (hey, when we start he's obviously married, and we meet his kids in the first chapter, so it shouldn't be too much of a stretch to realize there's gonna be some bitter in with the sweet) but that's fine. I like happy endings and all, but sometimes they won't fly, and I think it's pretty clear from the prologue that this is one of those times. (I do write happy ending stories, honest!) Dunno what there is to learn from the story. Guess we'll see as we go along. -Dan

Heh. There's still time -- I need to go back and redo the last two chapters of Yankee...

Maybe, but more likely it's the fact that Milo's friends with Jame, and that makes Nelson automatically one of the bad guys. He may think Nelson's doing this because of money, but more likely he thinks Nelson's doing it because it's a Clever Plan to work some sort of mischief, or revenge, or something. Besides, first impressions die really hard, when they ever do, and Milo's first and second impressions weren't good. (First being Jame making it known he was evil, and the second being that drunken stunt that trashed all his paintings) And let's not forget how desperately awkward it can be when the guy you're seriously crushing on is working hard to be friends with you. Especially if you're generally in the closet (though we don't actually know that -- he may be out at school and home and just nobody says anything. After all, why would they? Different, non-overlapping social circles and all that) and probably uncomfortable with being gay. Or, heck, being sixteen and just generally uncomfortable about all sorts of stuff. -Dan

Yeah, but there's no proof of that, so it's not all that good except between them, and I'm pretty sure he's not looking for ammunition in a personal war Oh, boy, I can't believe I'm geeky enough to have the details, but.., Nelson was first lunch because his art class was at the same time as second lunch. Parenting was the last class of the day. (And now I think I need to go watch some football or put up some shelves or something...) -Dan

I've had the odd experience of being able to edit drafts of a story I'm reading and really, really like. On the one hand, it's kind of cool -- I get to read chapters before everyone else. (nyah, nyah! ) Which isn't actually a cool thing all by itself, but I get a fix sooner than I might otherwise, and that's good. The downside to this is I actually feel kinda like crap about it, and more than a little guilty. And that's because I've been ripping the chapters to shreds. Stuff that I would've let slide or not even noticed as a regular reader gets red-flagged, and background and setting text I would've read and just filed away's gotten analyzed, picked apart, and critiqued. At some length. Plus my tendencies towards flip smart-assness tend to come out in the commentary, so in addition to the sea of red (Word's chosen red as the default color for my changes, to add insult to injury) there's the snark. The worst bit is I can't really not do this. I know that when I have other people read my stuff I want them to rip it to shred it. Every weak sentence, awkward phrase, missing transition, inconsistent behaviour -- I want 'em pointed out so they can be fixed. And like it or not I'm doing that when I edit, because I can't not do it as best I can; it feels like cheating to let things I've noticed go by unremarked. On the other hand it feels really wrong to hand back a marked up copy of something I liked with the note "you can still see some margin space on page 14". It's just... weird. Uncomfortable was something I never expected with this. Not that I'm gonna stop, mind. As long as I'm asked to edit the things I will, it's just going to take a while to convince myself I'm not going to hurt an author's feelings by being (perhaps excessively) pickily honest. (And, just for the record, if anyone gets ahold of one of my drafts -- please, feel free to tear into the thing. You won't hurt my feelings, and I'd rather a few dozen things pointed out in draft than to notice them after they've hit print, virtual or not)