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methodwriter85

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  1. methodwriter85
    I posted this on Reddit, in a sub that talks about pleasant encounters you've had with people that left a good impression on you. Here's a tale of an platonic stranger encounter I had when I was 21...
     
    ***
    When I was in high school, I was a hormonal gay teenager who had two minute crushes on any cute guy that crossed my path. There was this one guy, I can't even remember his name now, who was a senior when I was a freshmen. He was an artistic type, with auburn hair with sideburns that framed his long face, big brown eyes, fashionably thin, and alabaster skin. Very good-looking. I never really approached him or had any kind of sustained crush on him because we never had any classes together or ever interacted, but I definitely noticed him.
     
     
     
    About six years later during the start of the 2007-2008 school year, I was a college student hanging out with this group of alternative hipster types, who would throw parties. I went to the house barbeque of one quirky hipster girl that did like me, but the party was about to move over to this one guy's house, who did not like me at all. When that party started breaking up, Jake told me this bullshit story about how they didn't have enough room at his house for me to go. I didn't really make a big deal about it,
     
    Some guy who straggled and was kind of sitting outside in a lawn chair basically struck up a conversation with me slightly before Jake came out to talk to me about how "there was no space for me at his house." As dusk turned to night Guy and I talked a bit about our lives. In retrospect this guy was probably very high and very much in need for someone to talk to, which made him way more candid than a young guy usually is to some random dude.
     
    Guy told me that he was a struggling heroin addict. He had been dealing with this dramatic relationship with a girl that he was very much in love with, but also using with. Guy told me about how he had a period in his life where he felt very strong, how yoga had made him very muscular and fit, and how much he loved his girlfriend and tried to have a life with her. Guy was also very fascinated by Japanese culture (I think he mentioned doing martial arts), and he wanted to move there someday.
     
    But his heroin addiction was destroying him, both physically and emotionally, and he wanted to get out of it but couldn't figure how. When we talked, I realized that Guy was the cute senior guy I remembered crushing on whenever I saw him around the school....he looked a bit different...still beautiful, but his face had become slightly bloated, he was stockier as opposed to rail thin, his hair was much shorter and spiky instead of curling around his ears, and his skin was patchy. Again, this was just a guy I thought had been pretty cute...not any guy I spent more than two seconds thinking about after I saw him walking around the hallways, so it took me awhile to place him.
     
    I just listened to Guy talk about his problems, and I shared some of my own. Then Guy listened as Jake went on his b.s. speech to me about not having room at his house. After Jake left, Guy told me, "You know that Jake just doesn't want you there because he doesn't like you, right?" I gave him a "No, duh" face and then he continued telling me about how Jake had told him what an annoying, douchey guy I was.
     
    Then Guy said, "But after talking to you...the guy that Jake described, and the guy that I'm talking to right now...you're nothing like that. And whatever beef Jake is having with you, it's not on you. You're not the bad guy here. There is nothing wrong with you."
     
    This guy, who was all of about 22 or 23 years old and struggling with some VERY serious demons, took the time out to tell me that he thought I was a quality person, after someone had just Mean-Guyed the hell out of me.
     
    The conversation soon broke up and we went our separate ways. I don't remember ever seeing him again...I didn't really hang out that much with that crowd going into that school year because I made a good friend that I hung out with a lot more, and hipsters were not his thing, and Jake continued being adamant about how much he didn't want me around so I stopped getting invited to the parties they threw. Which was fine by me because I had made friends I fit in better with by then.
     
    I hope Guy's in a good place. At 21, I thought it was just cool that this guy that I had randomly run into this guy from high school that I had never interacted with before. I had appreciated him thinking that he thought I was cool, as stoned as he was. At 29, and from the perspective of losing a very good friend to a heroin dose, I just hope that Guy found whatever inner peace he was looking for, and he's just another happy 30-ish year old guy...maybe in Japan with a loving wife doing yoga all the time.
     
    Guy was just as beautiful on the inside as I thought he was on the outside. He deserves to be living a good life, and I hope he is.
     
    As a post-script, Jake came up to me in a bar about five years later to say hi. I was shocked, but then asked him about his life and talked about mine. Then Jake said to me, "Dude, I really just came up to say hi." Then walked away. I thought to myself, "Thank you for reminding me why I hated you so much back then, Jake!"
  2. methodwriter85
    YouTube is celebrating its 10th anniversary this month, and to celebrate, I thought I'd post my favorite 10 videos from YouTube. What are yours?
     
    10.
    by Jenna Marbles, 2010 
    I love how Jenna Marbles packs insightful social commentary into a dumb blonde persona. Well-done.
     
    9. "
    , 2008 
    Twilight brought much laughter during its run, least of all the many, many spoofs that existed.
     
    8.
    , 2007 
    For context: Britney Spears 2007 VMA's
     
    7. "Oakland!", 2009 (A Tourism Guide)
     
    6.
    ", 2014 
    5.
    , 2012 
    4.
    by MainStayPro, 2011 
    Fan film that imagines Haymitch's time in the Hunger Games. Really well-done.
     
    3.
    ", 2008 
    Obama's election to the tune of "One Day More" from Les Miserables. 'Nuff Said.
     
    2.
     
    I watched Simon Cowell be a nasty piece of work towards people who aren't conventionally good-looking for years on American Idol, and it was amazing to watch all these people who were laughing at her because of her looks shut up when they realized how good she was. Talk about ripping through all cynical.
     
    And one is of course....
     
    1.
    , 2011 
    So what are your favorite videos?
  3. methodwriter85
    Today is the 20th anniversary of the Oklahoma City bombing, which is the largest domestic terrorist attack that has happened in the U.S. On April 19th, 1995, 168 people died when Timothy McVeigh parked a van in front of a federal building filled with explosives.
    Bill Clinton, who was president when the attack happened, lead the memorial ceremony today.
    20th Anniversary of Oklahoma City Bombing Remembered
     
    I was 2nd grade when this happened, and its the first big tragedy that I remember really registering with me. I lived in Copperas Cove, Texas, so Oklahoma was our neighboring state...I remember being asked to collect pennies for the recovery fund.
    It feels like this event got overshadowed by 9/11 and it doesn't seem to get remembered nearly as much. Still, it deserves to be. Crazy when you think of those 19 children who should have been in their 20's and living life now. I will never forget the image of the firefighter carrying the baby that died.
  4. methodwriter85
    Everybody knows Simple Minds for their big single, "Don't You Forget About Me" from the Breakfast Club, but did you know they had another hit single and were not actually one-hit wonders? Yup, they had a tune released in the fall of 1985 and it was a hit- not as big as their signature tune, but still successful. It's been largely forgotten, but I heard this tune many years ago on a show called Glory Daze, which was set in 1986 and followed guys pledging a frat. I heard a snippet on the show, but had no clue what the name of it was or who played it. It wasn't until like recently that I heard it played on the radio, and the announcer said it was a tune by the Simple Minds. Color me shocked, because again, I was under the impression they were a 1985 one-hit wonder. Anyway, check it out:
     


     
    I think it's a lovely tune...it's not as soaring as their big hit, but it has its own charms. Kind of a shame it seems like nobody remembers it and it's completely overshadowed by "Don't You Forget About Me".
     
    Were any of you guys familiar with this forgotten oldie?
  5. methodwriter85
    I came across this pretty neat story about a Blue Jays prospect, who despite having a 2 million dollar signing bonus, lives in a van at a Florida Wal-Mart and leads a spartan lifestyle by choice.
     
    The Man in the Van by Eli Saslow
     
    I really do admire people who live such free, minimalist lifestyles like that. I find the guy a throwback to the 1970's, when some people rejected the materialism of American society and went off to try and live off the land in nature. He's not quite doing that, but I do think Daniel is practicing a lot of those same values- being self-sufficient, not having much beyond the bare minimum, and a lot of self-reflection. Whether or not the guy gets into the Major Leagues or not, he's already won at life because he's figured out the way to lead a life that makes him happy.
     
    Way too much about the life we're told we should have is about acquiring stuff. I like that Daniel Norris decided that it was not the life for him, and he's gone for it despite his teammates who probably think he's absolutely off his rocker. I'm glad he's being celebrated for his eccentricity, rather than being mocked for it.
     
    I also have to admit, I have this fantasy of what it might be like to lead that kind of lifestyle...living in a van (probably more like a Winnebago), traveling around the United States, and being a free-spirit with nothing tying him down. I don't actually think I could do it, but more power to this guy for being able to do so.
  6. methodwriter85
    Hey, for those of you that were interesting in following the story about my friend Tim who got arrested during an Unfortunate Sidetrack, I talked to him on Facebook recently.
     
    Tim is generally doing okay. He told me that Nassau County (New York) is still dragging their feet on giving him a plea bargain so he can avoid being charged with a misdemeanor, but he can put things off for awhile now. Tim's still hopeful they'll give him the plea bargain, and he doesn't think this will go to trial- most likely to a hearing.
     
    I did hope this would have been resolved by now, but eh, the system can be a pretty lengthy process. I do hope he can get the no contest plea bargain or something, but at the very least, he doesn't have to worry about a felony.
  7. methodwriter85
    Fault in Our Stars actor Ansel Elgort posed for the cover of Town and Country Magazine. Check out his photos and the accompanying write-up!
     
    He just seems like such a down-to-Earth guy despite his rich New York City upbringing and his bourgeoning fame. I love how tall the guy is as well.
     
    It's interesting to see just how fast this guy's fame has come on- Divergent and the Fault in Our Stars were literally his second and third IMDB credits. I actually think he has a pretty good shot of surviving the whole "flavor of the month" deal. He has a shitload of charisma- he didn't really do it for me until I saw him in motion on the screen for The Fault in Our Stars. I'm excited to see what he does with his current momentum.
  8. methodwriter85

    Transitions

    By methodwriter85,

    My mother found out today that her long-time companion, who lives with us, is going to die of leukemia in a few weeks. He's 83, and he's had awful health problems for the last two years, so more than anything, I feel relief for him that he's going to be released from the constant pain he's had.
     
    I just feel bad for my mother,. It's going to be hard for her. She really did depend on him. When I said it was going to be alright, she cried, "But I wanted him to live long enough to pay off his car!"
     
    At the same time, I just feel an overwhelming sense of relief, because as his health deteriorated, he had gotten increasingly verbally abusive to my mother and to myself. It's just his time.
     
    And the other thing is...it probably sounds selfish, but I've felt this obligation to stay in Delaware despite the fact that this state is such a dead-end if you're not in healthcare, chemicals, or the banking industry, because my mother needed help in caring for him. So there's that.
     
    I feel like there's a bumpy couple of months for us, but we'll be okay. Still, I do feel bad for my mother, and I hope that he manages to have as little pain as possible for the last couple weeks.
     
    Anyway....
     

     
    I just feel like there's a new era about to dawn, and some transitions to be made, but I just feel like everything will be alright, no matter how they turn out.
  9. methodwriter85
    It's been a weird couple of days. I turned 29 yesterday, and on November 29th, I commemorated the 1st year anniversary of my close friend Steve's death. Basically, I drove over to where Steve's old dorm where he was an R.A. and I spent a shit ton of time with him, and I got out a small candle and the prayer card that I got from Steve's memorial. It was actually kind of funny- I cried on my way there, but when I actually got to the dorm, I was pretty calm.
     
    I didn't really do much for my birthday- no birthday cake, no cards, no party. I did get some well-wishes, and I'm expecting that I'll get my birthday gifts for Christmas. I'll do something with one of my friends when he gets some free time- he said he owes me a night getting drunk once he's done with family time.
     
    Part of me wanted to do big stuff, but the other part of me was pretty content with what I did do- make a steak, then go over to my old college hangout bar to have an Angry Orchard and then listen to a good cover band. I also saw a stage play of It's A Wonderful Life at the local community theater, which was fun. Basically, it was set up like a 1940's radio station doing a radio broadcast of It's A Wonderful Life, with the actors voicing different characters. It definitely lifted my spirits, considering that I'm stuck in this soul-crushing retail stock boy job that I absolutely hate and can't wait to be let go from.
     
    I miss being excited for birthdays, but I kept thinking about how this is another birthday Steve won't get to celebrate. He missed his 28th birthday, and he'll miss his 29th. I think it's a combo of really hating this retail job and missing Steve that kept me from bouncing up and down for it.
     
    I'm grateful I had this birthday, for sure. It was just a pretty quiet one.
  10. methodwriter85
    I just got finished with two books, very different, but very enjoyable reads.
     
    The first was The Wolf Of Wall Street by Jordan Belfort, where he details his experiences as the leader of the circus that was his stockbroker firm Stratton Oakmont during the heady days of the 1990's economic boom. Its 500 pages and pretty dense, and it took me awhile to read...I started back in August, took a break until a couple weeks ago, and then go to the end. It was a pretty eye-opening read, dealing in a world where men earn and lose millions of dollars a day. The hedonism was pretty cool to read about as well, especially since it didn't come with the kind of moralizing you expect. Jordan doesn't go, "Well, you know, I feel really horrible about the bad things I did." It's more like, "I did it, I lived it, and it was one hell of a ride that I'm lucky to have survived." He might be a greedy slimeball, but you can't help but like his candor.
     
    I would beg Mark Arbour to read it, but I'm assuming he already has. The guy who wrote Millennium would enjoy the hell out of The Wolf of Wall Street- all that financial mumbo-jumbo greed stuff. I'm sure he probably knew quite a lot of Jordan Belfort types in his former life.
     
    The second was Me Before You by Jojo Moyes, which follows the story of Louisa Clark, a small-town English woman who takes a job caring for Will Traynor, a former high-powered businessman who became a quadriplegic after an accident. Having lost his will to live, Louisa takes it upon herself to show him that life is still worth living. Which is a pretty cheesy premise, but the book manages to elevate itself by refusing to make things clear-cut or easy, and the way in which we get to see Louisa come out of her shell as she starts to take steps beyond the provincial life she has cocooned herself in.
     
    Definitely worth a read if you're into romantic stuff.
  11. methodwriter85
    Tomorrow I'm getting ready to take a bus into New York City, spend an overnight at a college's friend's house, and then spend Saturday at my friend's memorial. So...here are songs I'm listening to.
     
    The Grief Playlist- Steve Edition
     
    1.
     
    2. "
     
    3. "Boys of Summer" by the Ataris (Instrumental)
     
    4. "
     
    5.
     
    6.
     
    7. "Fields of Gold" by Sting
     
    8.
     
    9.
     
    10.
     
    11.
     
    12. "Make You Feel My Love" from Glee
     
    13.
  12. methodwriter85
    I've been working as an intern in a museum with my supervisor, Katie, for the past couple of weeks. Today, we had a discussion that turned into the paranormal, and she told me about something that happened when she was a teenager. She tries to debunk crazy things that have happened, but this is one she hasn't been able to do.
    It was the summer after she graduated from high school, sometime in the second half of the 1990's. She was 18 at the time. Her friend Billy was a few years older, but still lived with his mother in their house. This was in a small town some distance away from Baltimore, and Billy's house had just enough land that he could throw raging, day-to-night summer parties complete with bonfires. At the same time, they weren't totally isolated, and random people from the surrounding neighborhoods would show up to his parties all the time.
    This kid named Nick started showing up every day at Billy's house, knocking on the door at 7 a.m. and engaging him in the morning-til-night drinking. He was about 16, seemed fairly normal and everything except for a couple of things. The first was that he always wore the same thing- for two weeks, he never changed clothes, and his clothes still looked clean. The second is that he was never seen eating or going to the bathroom, despite the fact that Nick was drinking heavily with Billy. Finally, oddly enough, no one remembers actually feeling Nick's skin- even my supervisor, who had sat next to him in a car.
    She hung out with Billy and Nick at Billy's house two times, and each time she and her friend felt like something was very "off" with Nick, especially when he would give off this laugh that just sounded very evil and maniacal.
    Finally, Billy's hospitality reached its limits- after two weeks of waking Billy up at 7 a.m. to go party, Billy snapped at Nick. He told Nick that he was waking up his mother trying to sleep, and that he's been hanging out at his house all day and night for two weeks straight and that he really just needs to come back later. Nick never showed up again.
    Billy came to Katie, a little bit later, with a newspaper article. It was about Nick, who had apparently killed himself. Billy was originally upset because he felt like he must've put Nick over-the-edge when he kicked him out, until he checked the dates.
    Nick had killed himself with his father's shotgun over two weeks ago.
    Katie has tried to come up with logical reasons for why this happened. The most logical one was that they screwed up the dates in the newspaper and Nick had indeed killed himself right after his talk with Billy, but two weeks? That's a huge discrepancy.
    What gets me about this is that I've never heard of a smart haunting that was apparently so strong that it could manifest itself as a solid human form, enough that it could fool people into thinking he was a person, for that long. I mean, I've hard of ghosts "saying goodbye" right after their death, but nothing that sounds like that. And there's the fact that he interacted with a a lot of people, not just my supervisor and her friend. He was acknowledged by other people who came into Billy's house, not just Billy and Katie.
    Have any of you, or people you know, had a long, sustained smart haunting like that? I'd love to hear any.
  13. methodwriter85
    Steve's girlfriend posted on Facebook tonight saying that today was the six-month anniversary of his passing. It's pretty weird- I didn't even think about that at all today. I just went about today like it was any other day- I spent the evening working on my case statement. I didn't think about Steve for any concentrated period at all.
     
    The grieving process is a weird, uneven thing. Right now, I feel oddly calm and accepting about it. Every couple of weeks or so, I get a flare up and it gets pretty bad- I had a bad case of it I believe in April, but it's not an every day, every week thing anymore.
     
    I just don't feel like the same guy I was before it happened, and I'm getting used to the new version of me more. I feel a little more serious, a little less like a bouncy kid, and a little more willing to accept the fact that I'm not 23-year old rager lovin' Jerms anymore, and be okay with that. I'm starting to get used to the fact that I can't call up Steve anymore...even though I still haven't brought myself to delete his number from my phone. I don't know if I ever will. Since I don't have him to call me out on my bullshit now, I kind of have to do it myself and try and cut it out myself.
     
    It's just crazy to think that life really does go on, even though he doesn't get to. His 28th birthday is coming up in early July, but he won't ever be older than 27. I'll turn 29 in six months, but I won't get to bitch with him on the phone about how much I hated that we were all going to be 30 so soon.
     
    The fact that I'm able to talk about him at all without sobbing hysterically drives home the point that time really has passed, and I've moved on, even with the occasional flare-ups. I feel like I've emerged, in some way, from the big haze that I was in during the winter when I was struggling with this. I've even accepted the fact that I'll have these flare-ups, and it'll be okay to have them- times when I feel absolutely lousy and pissed off and I can't do anything about it.
     
    Certain songs I can't listen to anymore without feeling my eyes tear-up, but that's okay as well.
     
    Part of me thinks that I should be a sobbing mess on the floor right now and feels guilty that I didn't even think of Steve until I read his girlfriend's post, but the other part of me has Steve's voice in my head going, "Remmy, stop being such a bitch. It's alright. Live your fucking life already. You'll see me when you see me."
     
    So yeah, it's alright. I'll see him when I see him, just like before, only instead of being measured in summers or in vacation breaks, it'll be in decades. (Hopefully, anyway.)
  14. methodwriter85
    Right now I'm in the midst of this volunteer project I'm doing with the Delaware Division of Historical and Cultural Affairs. I'm basically writing a paper showing why this one site should get more funding, and I've been going down to Dover once a week to research in the archives. It's been a lot of fun, and it's great to dust off my old writing skills. The project deadline is June 15th and it should be relatively easy.
     
    The other thing that I've been a part of is helping the new president at the museum I've been volunteering with...she's trying to streamline the museum, and de-clutter the place, so I just spent 6 hours going through the place and figuring out things we can ditch to try and free up space in the upstairs where the collections are stored. She's also having the volunteers come up with ideas to try and get more visitors, so it's been pretty fun doing that. Our old president, god bless him, was a nice guy but didn't really let us do more than collections care or moving around exhibits.
     
    I just feel a pretty big sense of accomplishment right now.
  16. methodwriter85
    A pot-selling drug ring, aimed at selling to teenagers in the tony suburbs of the Mainline in Philadelphia, was busted. Titled "The Mainline Takeover Project", the ringerleaders were graduates of The Haveford School, and were once stand-outs on their lacrosse team.
     
    This makes me think about the plot in Cross-Currents, where Andy and Trey get the idea that it might be cool for them to become drug dealers on the basis that because they're good-looking and popular, people might be more comfortable buying from them, without getting the idea that you should be as low-profile as possible. (Thank god the drug guy turned them down flat.)
     
    Anyway, the really cynical part of me thinks that these kids will pretty much get off with a slap on the wrist because they're from "good families" in good areas who went to good schools, except for Neil Scott, who will get scapegoated as the bad evil older man who led these impressionable teenagers down a bad path. Tim Brooks' lawyer was already working hard for his retainer fee.
     
    I think there's something fascinating about teenagers who are motivated to do this- they come from rich/affluent families so they don't need the money the way the stereotypical drug dealers do, and they wind up risking what should be very bright futures ascribed to them by their "Little Boxes" upbringing. Maybe it's a combination of greed and boredom with their lives.
  17. methodwriter85
    The iconic pop culture media website, TWOP, is closing its door.It's a total bummer. I grew up on posting on the site. I started posting there when I was 14 years old, in the spring of 2000. That is literally half of my life. I remember back in those days, my posts would likely revolve around the WB line-up...Dawson's Creek, Buffy, Popular (THAT was a big one for me because the board there was really active), Roswell (which was able to have 3 seasons instead of just 1 because the members of then-MightyBigTV banded together to get the show renewed), and Felicity. (I remember the on-going theory was that Ben was going to eventually abuse Felicity- didn't happen, but still.)
     
    Then the summer of 2000 happened, and with it, Survivor, and the big boom of the reality show phenomenon.
    , and that's largely because of the person who recapped it, and declared it one of the nastiest, hateful speeches she'd ever seen on T.V. Reality shows would eventually morph into stuff like The Osbournes and The Hills, but I don't think anything will ever top or replicate the Survivor phenomenon, where you suddenly saw ordinary people being turned into household names because they were appearing as themselves on a t.v. show. (You got a preview of that on the Real World, but Survivor was a much bigger show.) The discussions we had on MightyBigTV as this developed was pretty interesting, and somewhere during this era I learned the term :snark", and it became a part of my personality. Another term that I learned from TWOP in this era, when American Idol hit big in 2002, was the term "eyefuck", which described how Justin Guarini's eyes looked while singing on camera- it was kind of the updated term for the old-timey term "bedroom eyes." 
    After Survivor and American Idol, the next big show that I got into while reading MightyBigTV/TWOP was The O.C., in 2003. It was a hit show that had a lot of posters talking, and loads of controversy, especially over the lack of acting chops of Mischa Barton, and the fast decline in quality of the show, which seemed to have imploded during season 3 but then given a chance to redeem itself during a shortened season 4 run.Here, I picked up the term "bromance" as Ryan Atwood and Seth Cohen had a great bromance. Also at this same time period, I got into the show Veronica Mars, which was tailor-made for a place like TWOP because the show actually had a lot of race, class, and gender conflicts that made for great discussion.
     
    In early 2005, my high school classmate appeared on the reality t.v. show on MTV called Made as a "Basketball Jock Who Learns Ballet", and I was so excited and posted a lot about it. He read the site and actually figured out who I was, and the whole thing got out, so I got a little bit of grief about it. In retrospect, that was an interesting lesson for me as a teenager to learn about the idea that what you say and do on the internet can come back to haunt you. Nowadays we hear so much about kids who overshare or post stupid things on the internet, and I kinda felt like a person my age was right at the beginning of all that.
     
    As the years went on, the site changed, the way people view T.V. shows changed(just think- in 2000 Ipods didn't exist and now people watch T.V. on them), and the site got more and more regulated. I'm still pretty active in TWOP, but I haven't quite thrown myself into the community the way I used to. Part of it is that at some point, my life stopped revolving around the WB lineup. (Seriously, my 14/15 year old journal entries were all about watching episodes of Buffy and the like.) I also think I took a lot of that enthusasm for discussion that I had with TWOP when I was a teenager and put it into Adam's many iterations of this bar, and Gay Authors. I know Adam rolls his eyes when I go on about the Hunger Games or other pop culture stuff instead of analyzing Mozart's music or pondering Kafka, but I do think it's a good thing to analyze pop culture. It often has a way of putting a mirror on contemporary society, and giving us a sense of where we're at and what we're valuing. (Or not valuing.) Not to mention throw a spotlight on the social issues that are plaguing us. I actually remember being surprised when I watched OnDemand streamings of the 80's sitcom Facts of Life and being surprised at how many of the topics they covered were still VERY relevant to contemporary society- lesbianism, rape, teen suicide, eating disorders, human trafficking, the sexualization of young girls by the media, the push for Abstinence -Only sex education, racism, the treatment of handicapped people, the controversy that can surround a university donation, etc etc.
     
    I think TWOP taught me how to argue a point, how to snark, and most importantly, how to analyze a story's characters, writing, and acting. It made me think about how T.V. is often written in cliches and generic formulas, and then wonder WHY those cliches and stereotypes exist. And really appreciate when a show goes against the mold. If a moment on T.V. moved me, I learned to articulate WHY it moved me.And if it left me cold, I learned to articulate why it didn't move me. If I had a problem with the writing or creative direction or acting of a t.v. show, I learned to go beyond just saying "I think Riley on Buffy is a boring male Mary Sue."
     
    I think those were valuable things to learn. Generally, I think TWOP had a pretty positive influence on me (although Gay Authors posters can get at me for how intense I can be giving feedback to Mark Arbour), and I'll miss all of the intelligent pop culture analysis. It's so strange- I posted at that place for an entire half of my life. It's basically always been around, so I never thought it might not be around. It's not quite as looming large in my life as it used to (especially back when they had the Off-Topic board and I made a ton of e-friends from there), but it was a part for an incredibly long time (14 years) and I'll definitely miss it.
  18. methodwriter85
    As an update, Ethan called me tonight. We talked for two hours- he might have been a little drunk, but not anywhere near the way he was the last time we talked.
     
    Mainly, it was remembering our friend Steve. All these random little memories that we kept babbling about, because I think we both feel like we don't want to forget them. We don't want to forget his personality. His voice. His mannerisms. The way he wore this brown Sean John jacket and smelled of Black and Mild cigars. So many memories. And they're such good memories, for the most part- but at the same time, it hurts to remember them. He's the only one I know who fully gets that though, because he was closer to Steve than I was, and we knew him in the same context as all being students at the University of Delaware.
     
    We talked about the grieving process as well, and just how you can feel okay and not think about it, but then bam, something hits. I was telling him about how I can't get myself to delete Steve's number on my phone, and he was telling me about how he still calls him up from time to time to listen to the voicemail. And we both feel like it's still surreal, like it's not totally real, because we weren't there with Steve when he died. The realness of it all is probably going to come when we go to Steve's memorial in August.
     
    We also talked about the guilt we feel- he feels like it might have been his fault because getting stoned and drunk with Steve so much might have "encouraged him", and I feel guilt that I didn't third degree Steve about whether or not he was having problems. I feel like I might have just taken Steve at face value that things were going great for him, because I was in denial and wanted to believe that things were okay with him. (I have this e-friend who thinks that I had this idealized view of Steve, and I think he's right.) So then I told Ethan that I knew Steve a year longer and he was always like that, always trying to take the edge off. And he told me to remember that Steve was good at covering up his problems and looking like he had things together, and Steve might have been in denial about his own problems. And we both said to each other that we pretty much can't beat ourselves up about this. Which is true. All we could be was a friend. We couldn't save the guy. It's hard to accept that, but it's the truth- Steve had managed to survive a lot. He just used up too many chances and made too many bad decisions before it was finally his time to go. There is nothing I could have done, or Ethan could have done.
     
    We did talk about some day, getting the whole gang back together and just hang out; have something like our college rager days. I hope we do it. In the meantime, I tried to make it as clear as possible to Ethan that he can call me up whenever he's feeling bad, and I hope he does. Ethan's told me he's been drinking heavily (shocker) so I hope I can do what I can to help him work through that by listening to him, if he wants to be listened to.
     
    The biggest thing that I got out of being a friend to Steve for 6 years is that you've got to be willing to take the good and the bad with people...I was a fair-weather friend who stuck mainly to fair-weather friends until I really went through an incredible amount of crap when I was 21-22, and Steve helped me get through it. Steve stuck by people thick through thin, and he didn't judge. I want to try and hew to that as much as I can in my relationships and friendships going forward. That's probably the best way I can honor Steve- being as good of a friend to people as I possibly can be.
  19. methodwriter85
    So I need a pick-me-up, and what better way than to listen to great 80's pop? Let's start!
     
    Pop Goes The 80's Playlist, Part 1 (1980 - 1985)
     
    1.
     
    2.
     
    3.
     
    I remember seeing an interview with Madonna where she said that had she know this song would have branded her the Material Girl for the rest of her life, she might not have done it. LOL.
     
    4. "Let The Music Play" by Shannon
     
    5. "Cars" by Gary Numan
     
    6.
     
    7.
     
    8.
     
    This is one bat-shit crazy video.
     
    9.
     
    10.
     
    11.
     
    12.
     
    13.
     
    It's hilarious how obvious that they used multiple stunt dance doubles in this.
     
    14.
     
    And you get a double shot of Irene Cara! I think it was my great sorrow that my high school never did something like this. We didn't have enough really good dancers, unfortunately.
     
    15.
     
    16. "
     
    17.
     
    Valley Girl. God, what a wonderful teen movie. Also, Nic Cage was surprisingly hot when he was young.
     
    18. "Mickey" by Toni Basil
     
    19.
     
    20.
     
    21.
     
    22.
     
    The Boy George Behind the Music episode was pretty good. So, basically this song is about how Boy George was getting extremely pissed at his lover, the drummer of the band.
     
    23.
     
    24.
     
    I remember this tune being the closing song for "The Ryan White Story", which was a t.v. movie starring the little boy from Witness as the real-life Indiana kid who was banned from school for contracting A.I.D.S. after his bloodclotting treatments.
     
    25.
     
    26. "
     
    27.
     
    28. "Down Under" by Men At Work
     
    29. "The Neverending Story" by Limahl
     
    30.
     
    Hands down, my favorite music video from the 1980's. Sure, Thriller is technically the best video from that decade, but there's a whimsy fantasy about Take On Me that's just so irresistible.
     
    God, I wish it could be 1984-1985 again...what a fun time for music.
  20. methodwriter85
    So, the year's over, and we're starting a new year...what was your playlist for 2013? Here was mine...
     
    1.
     
    2.
     
    3.
     
    4.
     
    5.
     
    6.
     
    7.
     
    8.
     
    9.
     
    10.
     
    11.
     
    12.
     
    13.
     
    14.
     
    15.
     
    16.
     
    17.
     
    18.
     
    19.
     
    20.
     
    21.
     
    It seems like for 2013, there were two trends- electronic-based, and folksy inspired stuff. Kinda diametrically opposed, but it makes sense that there'd be two trends that were pretty opposite of each other. Like back in the late 90's, when you had boyband pop on one side and the Limp Bizkit/Korn rap-metal stuff on the other.
     
    I kind of wonder if that's why Blurred Lines was such a huge hit- there wasn't anything like it coming out because it was a 70's R&B throwback.
     
    In any event, I'm definitely enjoying this decade for music, as opposed to back in the 2000's when it was pretty much hip-hop 24/7/365 in the Top 40.
  21. methodwriter85
    Sounds of A 90's Childhood Playlist, Part 2
     
    1."
     
    2. "
     
    3.
     
    4. "
     
    5.
     
    6.
     
    7.
     
    8. "
     
    9.
     
    10.
     
    11.
     
    12.
     
    13. "
     
    14.
     
    15.
     
    16.
     
    17.
     
    18.
     
    19.
     
    20. "
     
    21.
     
    22.
     
    23.
     
    24. "All I Wanna Do" by Sheryl Crow
     
    25.
     
    26.
     
    27.
     
    28. "We Are Young" by Supergrass
     
    29.
     
    30. "Kiss From A Rose" by Seal
     
    I honestly think 1994 to 1996 were the best years for music in that decade, with 1995 being the high water mark. Everything was on full-blast that year.
  22. methodwriter85
    The 1970's
     
    1979: "Video Killed The Radio Star" by the Buggles. The Iranian Hostage Crisis begins. Three Mile Island. A "Disco Sucks" rally is held where thousands of disco records are burned.
     
    1978: "Heart of Glass" by Blondie. "Halloween" is a hit movie. "Dallas" premieres.
     
    1977: "Go Your Own Way" by Fleetwood Mac. Elvis dies. Jimmy Carter takes over the presidency. Studio 54 opens in New York City.
     
    1976: "Baby, I Love Your Way" by Peter Frampton. The American Bicentennial. Nadia Comaneci scores the "perfect 10" at the Montreal Olympics. "Taxi" is a hit movie.
     
    1975: "At Seventeen" by Janis Ian. "Jaws" becomes a major summer blockbuster. Pet rocks are a major fad. "Stepford Wives" is a thriller movie. Khmer Rouge Cambodia.
     
    1974: "The Locomotion" by Grand Funk Railroad. Richard Nixon resigns from the presidency. The Broad Street Bullies win the Stanley Cup. "Earthquake" is a hit disaster movie. Streaking is a college campus fad.
     
    1973: "Your Song" by Elton John. The Watergate Scandal heats up. The Oil Embargo crisis begins. The Vietnam War ends.The World Trade Center in New York City is completed. The Battle of the Sexes- Billie Jean King wins.
     
    1972: "Bang A Gong" by T-Rex. Richard Nixon vs. George McGovern. The Watergate break-in. The '72 Olympics in Munich terrorist attack.
     
    1971: "Baba O'Riley" by The Who. "Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory" is a hit film. Apollo 13.
     
    1970: "Four Dead in Ohio" by Crosby, Nash, and Stills. "Love Story" is a hit film. The Kent State Massacre.
     
    The 1960's
     
    1969: "I Shall Be Released" by Joe Cocker. "Midnight Cowboy" is a hit film. The Moon Landing. Woodstock.
     
    1968: "Love Is Blue" by Paul Mauriat. The Chicago student riots. Bobby Kennedy and MLK are assassinated. The Tet Offensive.
     
    1967: "Different Drum" by Linda Ronstadt and the Stone Poneys. The Summer of Love in San Francisco.
     
    Alright. I'm stumped now. I can't think of a single thing about 1966, and not much about 1967. That is how far I can go back.
     
    Fun playing this!
  23. methodwriter85
    So, to kinda "test" my off-the-top-of-my-head knowledge about modern history and pop culture, I thought it'd be fun to work back and see what events, songs, general popular culture I can remember off-hand from every year, and see how far I can go back without any kind of googling. (I won't try to add EVERYTHING, just a few things.) The year that stumps me and I can't recall anything about it, is the end of this nerd-out.
     
    The 2010's
     
    2013: The Navy Yard shooting. "Blurred Lines" by Robin Thicke. The Colorado forest fires. Gay marriage becomes legal in my home state, Delaware. The Ravens win the 2012 Super Bowl.
     
    2012: The Hunger Games craze. The Colorado movie theater massacre. "It's Time" by Imagine Dragons.The 2012 Summer Olympics in London- Micheal Phelps proves that he's still got some power left in him, and the Fab Five American Gymnasts steal our hearts. Hurricane Sandy. Obama gets re-elected. Sandy Hook massacre. The New York Giants win the 2011 Super Bowl.
     
    2011: "Last Friday Night" by Katy Perry. Occupy Wall Street. The unrest in Egypt. Hurricane Irene is a overhyped hurricane. The East Coast has a 5.0 Earthquake and FREAKS. The Packers win the 2010 Super Bowl.
     
    2010: "California Girls" by Katy Perry. The Tea Party wins big on Election Day. Christine McDonnell's "I Am Not A Witch" campaign. The Gulf Coast Oil Spill. The Winter Olympics in Vancouver- curling becomes a wonderfully mockable sport. The Saints win the 2009 Super Bowl.
     
    The 2000's
     
    2009: "Bad Romance" by Lady Gaga. (I think it was released in late '08, but Lady Gaga really picks up steam in '09.) Obama gets innaugurated. "The Hangover" is a popular movie. The Steelers win the 2008 Super Bowl, and I was rooting for them because the Cardinals knocked the Eagles out of the Playoffs. I thought Kurt Warner was kind of a DILF, though.
     
    2008: "I'm Yours" by Jason Mraz. Tina Fey shoots to fame mocking Sarah Palin. Obama gets elected. The housing/financial crisis starts. Federal bail-outs begin- "too big to fail" becomes a catchphrase. Summer Olympics in China- Michael Phelps breaks Mark Spitz's record for most gold medals in swimming. The Eagles knock the Cowgirls out of the 2008 playoffs with a 44-6 win. I wanna say...December 28th, 2008? The Phillies win the World Series in October, leading to riots around the city. The Twilight Craze.
     
    2007: "The Way I Are" by Timbaland. Virginia Tech massacre. "Knocked Up" is a popular movie.
     
    2006: "Where'd You Go" by Fort Minor. The Republicans get smacked on Election Day, and the Democrats gain control of both the senate and the house. "Heroes" becomes a popular show, but flames out a year later- "Save the Cheerleader, Save the World." Winter Olympics at Torino in Italy- Johnny Weir "he's here, he's Weir."
     
    2005: "Wake Me Up When September Ends" by Green Day. The Eagles lose the 2004 Super Bowl to the Patriots by 3 points. Hurricane Katrina. "The 40 Year Old Virgin" is a popular movie. YouTube is founded.
     
    2004: "Somebody Told Me" by the Killers. John Kerry vs. Dubya- "The Swift Boat Veterans for Truth." The Asian Tsunami. Gay marriage becomes legal in Massachusetts. New Jersey Governor Jim McGreevy- "My truth is that I am a Gay American." The Red Sox break their curse and finally win the World Series.
     
    2003: "Stacey's Mom" by Fountains of Wayne. The Iraq War begins- "Mission Accomplished." The O.C. premieres in August. Lost premieres that year as well, and becomes a cult T.V. show. Facebook gets founded. The Columbia explosion.
     
    2002: "Seven Nation Army" by The White Stripes". Avril Lavigne becomes the anti-Britney Spears. The D.C. shooting sniper. The Winter Olympics in St. Lake City- Sarah Hughes wins the Gold Medal.
     
    2001: "Here's to the Night" by Eve 6. The Dubya Years begin. 9/11. Anthrax attacks. The media frenzy with Chandra Levy. Aliyah dies. The rise of Destiny's Child. The Harry Potter and Lord of the Rings craze.
     
    2000: "The Graduation Song" by Vitamin C. Y2K worries are put to rest. Gore vs. Dubya- hanging chads in Florida. The sinking of the USS Cole. Survivor becomes a phenonmeon, while Beverly Hills 90210 ends it 10 year run. The tech crash.
     
    The 90's
     
    1999: "Millenium" by Robbie Williams. The Columbine Shooting. Kosovo. The Seattle World Trade Organization protests. (This might be 1998, but I'm leaning towards 1999.) Melrose Place ends it's 7 year run. Y2K survivalist fears.
     
    1998: "Closing Time" by Semisonic. Bill Clinton- "I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Monica Lewinsky." Seinfield goes off the air to the tune of "Time of Your Life" by Green Day. Well-loved comedian Phil Hartman is murdered by his wife.
     
    1997: "Quit Playing Games with My Heart" by The Backstreet Boys. A sheep is cloned. The Princess of Wales dies. The stock market begins a historic bull run. Titanic becomes a phenonmeon.
     
    1996: "The Macarena" by Los Del Rios. The 1996 Election between Bob Dole and Bill Clinton. The Atlanta Summer Olympics- Keri Strug, and the bombing. "Independence Day" launches Will Smith into the stratosphere. TWA Flight 800 explodes over Long Island.
     
    1995: "Gangsta's Paradise". The Oklahoma City bombing. Selena is killed. "Clueless" is a hit movie, and ushers in preppier fashion again. OJ is acquitted.
     
    1994: "The Sign" by Ace of Base. Nancy Kerrigan vs. Tonya Harding, and Oksana Baul takes the Olympic Gold medal. The white Bronco car chase with OJ Simpson. Kurt Cobain dies. Los Angeles has a big earthquake.
     
    1993: "Dreams" by The Cranberries. "Jurassic Park" is a huge hit movie. Lorena Bobbitt. The World Trade Center in New York City gets bombed.
     
    1992: "What's Up" by 4-Non Blondes. George H.W. Bush loses election to Bill Clinton- "It's the economy, stupid." Also, "Don't Stop Thinking About Tommorrow" is the Bill Clinton Campaign Song. "Batman Returns" is a popular film. Hurricane Andrew.
     
    1991: "Smells Like Teen Spirit" by Nirvana. Grunge becomes huge. The Persian Gulf War- yellow ribbons. Anita Hill. The Soviet Union dissolves.
     
    1990: "Nothing Compares 2 U" by Sinead O'Connor. "Ghost" is a huge hit. The D.C. mayor is smoking crack. (I could be wrong about this one.) Vanilla Ice becomes a rather hilarious one-hit wonder. Julia Roberts becomes a huge star because of "Pretty Woman".
     
    The 1980's
     
    1989: "Like A Prayer" by Madonna. The World Series Earthquake. "Batman" is a hit movie. (It's actually the first movie I remember seeing in the theater.) The Berlin Wall is torn down. Hurricane Hugo. Ronald Reagan leaves office.
     
    1988: "Under the Milky Way" by The Church. H.W. Bush vs. Michael Dukaksis- "Read My Lips, No New Taxes!" Murphy Brown premieres, and Dan Quayle becomes her foe. Major Pan Am terrorist attack in the skies leads to hundreds dead.
     
    1987: "Don't Dream It's Over" by Crowded House. The Iran Contra Affair. The 1987 Stock Market Crash. "Fatal Attraction", "Wall Street", and "Dirty Dancing" are hit movies. Ryan White becomes a cause de celebre. (I could be so wrong about this one.) I also wanna say...Tammy Faye Baker?
     
    1986: "Manic Monday" by The Bangles. "Top Gun" is a hit movie. "Baby On Board" becomes a popular car sign. The Super-Bowl Shuffle from the 1985 Chicago Bears. The Challenger explosion.
     
    1985: "Man In Motion" by John Parr. "Dynasty" becomes the Number 1 Show, beating Dallas and using a fictional masscre to do it. Glasnost begins - "Mr. Gorbachev- tear down these walls!" "Back to the Future" is a huge hit movie. Live Aid. The Halle Bop comet. New Coke vs. Classic Coke.
     
    1984: "Like A Virgin" by Madonna. Ronald Regan vs. Walter Mondale- Reagan wins re-election. Geraldine Ferraro is the first female vice presidential candidate. Mass shooting in a California McDonald's. "Do They Know It's Christmas?" sparks a trend in celebrities trying to raise money for charities. "Footloose" is a hit movie. Mary Lou Rhetton wins the gold at the '84 Olympics in Los Angeles.
     
    1983: "Karma Chamelon" by the Culture Club. U.S. recession ends. "Thriller" by Michael Jackson sells 25 million albums. "Trading Places" and "Flashdance" are hit movies. The Star Wars triology comes to an end. The series finale of "Mash" becomes the most-watched television event ever. Cabbage Patch dolls are a huge fad. Beiruit.
     
    1982: "Valley Girl" by Frank and Moon Unit Zappa. Poltergiest is a hit movie. Prince William is born.
     
    1981: "Bette Davis Eyes by Kim Carnes. Recession begins. Reagan is almost assassinated by John Hinckley Junior, who's obsessed with Jody Foster. Natalie Wood dies in a drowning accident off the coast of Catalina. AIDS is first noticed. (It's called GRID at first.) Brooke Shields is named "The Face of the 80's" by Time.
     
    1980: "Call Me" by Blondie. The Phillies win the '80 World Series. "American Gigolo" launches Richard Gere. Ronald Reagan campaigns with "Morning in American" and wins the presidency. "Private Benjamin" is a popular movie. Jimmy Carter blunders by forcing the U.S. to boycott the 1980 Summer Olympics in the USSR. The U.S. hockey team wins against the USSR at the '80 Winter Olympics- "Miracle on Ice".
     
     
    Okay, I'm not stumped yet, but this is hellaciously long so I'll stop here and try a part 2. 1980 is a good place to stop. 1982 came REALLY close to stumping me, though- I couldn't remember much about that year.
  25. methodwriter85
    Today I came close to finishing the inventory on my final box before going into full-on processing.
     
    This box was one of the easier ones, as it mainly consisted of dated photo albums- so far ranging from 2009 down to 1979. One really cool photo I found was a 1981 photograph of then-Senator Joe Biden. I've seen a lot of photos with Senator Tom Carper (he was also governor of the state from 1993 to 2001), but I had never seen one with Joe Biden. Dude still didn't have a full head of hair even 32 years ago. Beau Biden must have lucked out either by not having the gene, or having really good hair work done on him. The 1981 photo album also had a pretty cool view of the old pedestrian bridge that used to exist over South College Avenue- it was brown and round-shaped, and it connected Smith Hall to a patch of grass on other side. Students called it the "Gerbil tube". It was replaced in the 1990's with a much more physically appealing white pedestrian bridge, and the patch of grass was built into Gore Hall in the late '90's.
     
    I also found a Guest Book that covered events going from 1979 all the way up to 1990- it was cool to see a guest book that was actually completed. I also really enjoyed finding the 1985 Photo Album, and thinking about how that was the summer my mother was pregnant with me.
     
    There's just something awesome about going through old photographs to me.
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