Dance Lessons - 5. S and M (Secrets and Muppets)

Another Saturday at the crazy house.

S and M (Secrets and Muppets)

“Since when do I have to tell you everything? KC popped his hands on his hips and stared at Cassie who was loading dishes into the dishwasher.

“Since I caught you jerking off watching The Waltons. Who does that? That’s a family show and frankly, I don’t know who you consider jerk off material on that show unless it’s Ike Godsey. That’s because he’s the only one that has any money besides the Baldwin Sisters and I know they don’t do anything for you. If you tell me who you were thinking about when you were jerking off, I won’t tell Jo Ann that you haven’t been spending any time with me on Saturday while she works.”

KC flopped down in a kitchen chair, crossing one leg over the other and popping his flip flop against the bottom of his foot as he began to swing it nervously. “I’ve had a reason for not spending time with you and Jo Ann will totally understand.”

Cassie snorted unbelievingly. “Like what? Reading to old people? How about volunteering at the soup kitchen downtown? She’ll know those are lies. More like screwing the new Baptist minister of the church over on Mason Avenue. I saw you drooling over him when he came to invite us to church a couple of weeks ago.”

“I have not been fornicating with the preacher and I don’t have time to help at the soup kitchen or I would. As for reading to old people, I do that sometimes at the hospital in the men’s ward.”

“That’s not a hospital KC. You know it’s a nursing home and you read to those old perverts from your porn mags. I’ve seen you sneak them out of the house. Word is you’ve turned them all into a bunch of gays who take turns jerking each other off at night. You should be ashamed of yourself!” Cassie walked over to the refrigerator and tore the top sheet off of the small note pad there. “I’m going to call in some groceries to be delivered unless you want to get dressed and go to the supermarket for me.”

KC’s face brightened. “Just have them delivered. I don’t feel like dressing right now.”

“Why don’t you go get them? Word is that poor delivery boy is overworked. The women in town have their groceries delivered so they can ogle him. Now I get it. You want to see the delivery boy also. If so, go get some damn clothes on. You’re not going to be sitting there in pink boxers and purple flip flops when he arrives. People talk about us enough as it is.” Cassie picked up her cell phone and called the supermarket, rattling off the items on her list. “Also, cut three rib eye steaks about inch and a quarter thick please.” After thanking the voice on the other end, she turned off her phone and went to the refrigerator and opened its door.

“Who drank the last beer? That pisses me off KC. I know you did it and you don’t tell anyone or go buy more. You better be glad I ordered some from the supermarket. Cough up twenty bucks right now. You’re buying.” Cassie, settling for wine, pulled the bottle from the shelf in the refrigerator. After opening it, she retrieved two wine glasses from the china cabinet and sat down across from KC.

“How do you know Jo Ann didn’t drink it the last of the beer? You blame me for everything.” He pouted like a child, bottom lip out, and his arms folded over his chest.

“Because, I left two beers in the refrigerator last night when Jo Ann and I went to bed and I know Jo Ann didn’t drink beer for breakfast. So, that leaves you. Now, give me the money.” Cassis held out her hand.

“I put money in the grocery jar yesterday when I got paid.” KC nodded toward the read ceramic canister on the cabinet that held a considerable amount of cash that the three of them added to periodically.

“You know alcohol is not bought out of grocery money. I paid for the last beer and Jo Ann spent over a hundred dollars at the liquor store yesterday. It’s your turn.” Cassie wiggled her hand.

KC unfolded his arms and drank from his wine glass. “I’ll bring it back after I put some clothes on. I don’t know why I have to dress though. My pink boxers are appropriately decent and there’s nothing wrong with my purple flip flops. You’re always worrying about what people think. Blah, blah, blah, who give a flying…”

“KC! Go get dressed and quit mumbling, and don’t forget the money.” Cassie got up to get cash from the canister before the delivery boy arrived with the groceries.

A few minutes later KC came back into the kitchen and sat back down in his chair across from Cassie. He mumbled as he slid a twenty dollar bill across the table to Cassie. “I don’t drink near the beer you do and I have to pay for the whole damn case.”

Without looking up from the money in her hand, Cassie said, “Shut up KC. I’m trying to count. You’d complain regardless. You never have a problem drinking Jo Ann’s booze and she doesn’t make you pay for any of that. You’re lucky.” She reached and got the twenty, adding it to the other money and laid it on the table between them. She took a drink of her freshly poured glass of wine and promptly spit it across the table onto the tight purple bra KC was wearing.

“Good god! Stand up and let me see what the hell you have on.” She wiped her hand across the back of her mouth and then put it back over her mouth to keep from laughing. Not only did KC have on a purple bra, but he sported a pair of shiny stretch neon green tights that left nothing in his crotch untouched. The outline of his cock was a perfect print in the front of the tights. Resembling a lime popsicle with balls, his hard on was displayed proudly under the tight thin material. To finish off the outfit, he’d changed the flip flops for a pair of strappy purple sandals with a two inch heels covered in pink rhinestones.

After she could speak and not laugh she said, “You’re going to either scare the delivery boy to death or give him an involuntary orgasm, one or the other. We’re certainly going to find out if he’s gay.”

“He is.” The words were out before KC could stop them.

“So, that’s where you’ve been on Saturdays, spying on the delivery boy.” Cassie waited for KC to answer. “Sit down so I don’t have to look at Wonder Weiner there.”

“Don’t call my man Wonder Weiner. I don’t call your coochie Peachy P...”

“Don’t you dare say that word! I swear I’ll tell Jo Ann if you do AND tell her you were jerking off while watching the Waltons.” Cassie shook her finger at KC.

“See, you say what you want and threaten me with Jo Ann if I say anything back to you. I can’t even defend myself.”

“That word is just awful. Wonder Wiener is not. Nuff said.”

They both jumped when a loud knock sounded at the kitchen door.

“I’ll get it,” they said in unison.

KC’s heel stepped on one of Cassie’s bare feet as he hurried to the door.

As he jerked the door open Cassie screeched, “Ouch you son of a …”

The delivery boy stood in the doorway, a grocery sack in each hand, his mouth wide open at the scene that greeted him.

Cassie was sitting in the middle of the floor holding her bleeding foot while KC stood in front of him, his hard on even stiffer, proudly displayed in the front of the silk tights.

“Here...here’s your groceries.” He handed the two bags to KC, trying not to stare at the bulge so proudly displayed. Noticing Cassie still sitting in the floor, he said, “Mam, are you ok?”

“I will be as soon as I kill that asshole right there.” She pointed at KC who’d set the groceries on the counter and turned to face them. Both Cassie and the delivery boy watched as the front of the tights began to protrude forward.

“Mm, I better go.” The now obviously aroused delivery boy was mesmerized at the lime green material that stood out toward him like a frozen Popsicle waiting to be licked. It was as if his feet were nailed to the floor.

Rolling her eyes, Cassie pushed herself to her feet and said, “Your money is on the table whenever you…well you know.” Cassie limped out of the room, rolling her eyes when she heard KC growl deep in his throat. “Shameless hussy.”

***

A couple of hours later and more clothes later Cassie sat in a chair on the patio with her hurt foot propped on Jo Ann’s lap, watching KC cook the steaks and some veggies on the grill.

“So, seems you two had quite an afternoon. That poor delivery boy will be calling us wanting to know if we need any groceries, KC.” Jo Ann laughed as KC preened in the black leather pants and red silk shirt he’d changed into before she got home. He’d completed his outfit with black boots. He looked sedate compared to his earlier attire.

“Yeah, he’s a cutie.” KC winked at Cassie as he spoke.

“What does he look like anyway? I don’t think I’ve seen him.” Jo Ann looked at Cassie and then KC.

Cassie thought for a minute. “Well, he’s clean cut, very young looking face, kinda like John Boy on the Waltons…that’s it!

KC ran across the grass and slapped Cassie’s sore foot with the spatula he held in his hand. “Don’t you dare!”

“What have you two done now?” Jo Ann swatted at KC for hitting Cassie.

finis

Hope you enjoyed!  I made all the mistakes all by myself.