TJ - 2. Chapter 2

TJ

Chapter 2

Thursday night Robert knocked on my door and asked, “Are you ready for Monday morning?”

“What do you think? I’m starting my senior year at a new school. I don’t know anyone. Not much to look forward to.” I stopped myself, took a deep breath, and then sheepishly looked at Robert. “I’m sorry. I know I’m being a jerk, I don’t really mean to be. I plan on going shopping tomorrow after therapy for some clothes and other shit I might need. Do you think Josh would want to go with me?”

“You’ll be fine. Josh will be hanging out with Jarrod and Mike tomorrow and then spending the night over at Jarrod’s. I’ll be out pretty late, so it’s probably best you plan on going shopping. That way you won’t be sitting here at home bored and alone.” Robert turned to go, but stopped. “Oh, by the way, I have a surprise for you. I spoke with Mrs. Sanders, the journalism teacher. I know you had to give up your position on the yearbook staff moving down here, so I used my influence as her boss and got you on the yearbook staff,” Robert said with a wink.

I couldn’t hide the smile on my face even if I tried. “For real?”

“Yeah, I looked over your schedule and made some adjustments. You’re now on yearbook staff and I got you into Advanced Drama. I also got you a free period you can use however you like. There are perks to being the assistant principal’s kid.” He said the last part with a hint of hope in his voice.

This particular song and dance with Robert was starting to get tiresome. He wants to be my father, but I’ll never be able to view him as anything other than my brother. I’ve asked him repeatedly to stop saying shit like that. All it does is piss me off. I felt the anger building up and there was nothing I could do to stop it. “Brother, Robert. The assistant principal’s kid brother. Dammit, I’ve told you a hundred times! I don’t need a new father. You’ll never replace him.” We stared daggers at each other for a few moments. “Besides, what right do you have to change my schedule? Trying to keep tabs on me all day now? You had no fucking right to do that. You gave up that right when you chose to leave me.”

This is where he would usually get a pained look on his face, bow his head, and apologize to me. His reaction this time surprised the shit out of me. “You know I’m getting really fucking sick and tired of hearing that shit. I’m not trying to replace Dad. I’m just trying to do the best I can for you and Josh. You’re not the only person who lost someone. I lost my parents too, remember?” Robert took a ragged breath, and then said in with a softer tone, “Who am I going to turn to when I have a question about Josh or you? Who am I supposed to ask for advice on how to be a good person and parent? At least you have someone looking out for you and only wants what is best for you. Besides, how many fucking times do I have to tell you how sorry I am for making that decision?”

I couldn’t believe this. I stared at him for a few moments-all I could see was red. I started yelling, “Advice on being a good parent? Not like you would’ve listened to it if you were to ask. You sure the fuck didn’t sixteen years ago when you married the cunt-whore-bitch, so why would you start now? A good parent wouldn’t have left his one year old son to be adopted and raised by his parents. A good parent would have told the kid the truth when he asked his older brother if there was a chance he was possibly adopted. A good parent would have stood up to his wife, instead of allowing her to insult his kid.”

Robert had a tear running down his cheek when I looked up at him. “I’m so sorry Teej, I didn’t want her to keep Josh and you apart. I thought I was doing what was best for both of you.”

Before I could respond, Josh came into my room. “Teej, Dad, please stop. I can’t handle y’all fighting again. Dad, you know he’s working on processing everything still. Teej, you know that Dad is trying to look out for you. I know you think it’s too late, but he is trying his best. Now, why are y’all arguing this time?”

I knew my answer was lame. I mumbled my response. “Robert went and changed my schedule without me knowing about it.”

Josh looked at me blankly. “So? He does it for Jarrod, Mike, and me every year. I want him to. That way, I’m not stuck with some lame teacher all year.”

“Oh, I didn’t really think of it that way.”

He rolled his eyes and asked, “What way did you think of it?”

Robert spoke up then. “He thought I was trying to keep tabs on him so I would know where he was at any time during the day.”

Josh looked at me like I had three heads and then started laughing. “Umm, Teej. All he has to do is type our name into his computer and pull up our schedule if he wanted to know where either of us were. You seriously went there?”

“Well, yeah. It sounded good in my head. The real reason we were fighting though was because he was trying to be my father and not my big brother.” I stopped. “No, I was trying to start a fight with him. Robert, please just be my brother. I’m not sure if I can ever see you as my dad, but I still need my big brother.”

Robert nodded. “I know Teej. But you know dimples over there is going to keep introducing you to everyone he can Monday as his brother, right? I mean he’s already told Jarrod and Mike the truth about y’alls relationship.”

“Yeah, I know. And I’m okay with being his brother. Hell, we’ve always been more like brothers than anything else. Besides, he asked me the other night if he could introduce me as his brother and then smiled at me with those damn dimples.”

“Hey! Don’t talk smack about my dimples, they’re irresistible. They make me adorably cute, and impossible to say no to. At least that’s what you used to tell me.”

I smirked. “Damn me and my big mouth.”

Josh looked between us before continuing. “So, are y’all good now? Teej? Dad?”

We both nodded. Josh sighed and said, “Good. So, I was thinking about coming out to Jarrod and Mike tomorrow night at our sleepover. I don’t think they’ll have a problem with it. They don’t have any problems with TJ being gay.”

Robert tensed up some. “Josh, are you sure? Once you do that, it will be out there and you won’t be able to take it back. I’m not sure it’s a good idea right now.”

I couldn’t hide the contempt in my voice. “Oh really, and why is that? Are you concerned about Josh or are you more worried about how it will look having two gays living with you?” Honestly, I don’t try to look for the negative in everything Robert says. Lately, he’s had that effect on me.

Robert glared at me, but didn’t object to what I said.

Josh noticed. “Dad, what do you mean? Why wouldn’t I be honest with my best friends? It’s not like I’m going to be the only gay guy in the school. Teej already told me he’s not going to hide it.”

Robert turned on me. “Really? You decided that without discussing it with me first?”

“I didn’t know it was something you needed to approve of, Robert. This is my life. I’m not going to hide who or what I am.”

“Think TJ. This isn’t the Dallas area. People aren’t as accepting of that lifestyle here.”

I was doing my best to not start in front of Josh. “I know you’re trying to look out for us. But I’m not going to hide who I am. I’m not going to go around telling everyone; but, if I’m asked, I won’t deny it. Also, if I meet someone, I won’t hide my relationship.”

Josh looked at his dad. “If you don’t think I should, then I won’t dad.”

That pissed me off more than anything. “The fuck you won’t Josh. I’m not telling you to come out or not. I’m only telling you that if and when you feel like the time is right, you should do it and not be afraid. I’ll be there for you.”

Robert glared at me. “And what about next year when you’re not in high school anymore and Josh has to go through his senior year alone? Who’s going to be there for him then TJ?”

“Would you rather him live his life as a lie? Let him be who he is. If his friends are truly his friends, he’ll have people by his side. Mom and Dad always told us to be honest about who we were and who we wanted to be. Are you seriously going to ask Josh not to do that?”

Robert hung his head. “I’m sorry. That came out wrong. I don’t want either of you to lie about who you are. But, I don’t want y’all to get hurt either. I’m afraid of how people might react. How y’all would be treated at school. I’m not ashamed of either of you. You shouldn’t be ashamed of who you are.”

I turned to Josh. “I’m not going to lie to you and tell you it’s going to be easy. I can’t promise you a specific outcome. I can promise you once you let go of this secret, you’ll feel an enormous weight lift off you. And who knows? You might even get Mr. Football/Baseball Stud. What does he always call you? ‘Little Buddy’, right?”

Josh turned the brightest shade of red I have ever seen. Robert looked dumbfounded. “What is he talking about Josh? Who is Mr. Football/Baseball Stud?”

“Dammit Teej! Don’t worry about it Dad. TJ is just joking around. It’s nothing and nobody to worry about.”

Robert gave him his best dad/principal look. “If it’s nothing to worry about, why are you turning that shade of red?”

“Please, Dad.” Josh glanced at me and gave me the evil eye. “Why did you say anything, jerkwad?”

“Josh, who is he talking about? I want to know.”

“Dad, I’m not going to tell you who I have a crush on. Jeez, just drop it okay?”

They continued their bantering as they left my room. At least it got the focus off me for a bit. That’s what I thought until about five minutes later when Robert came back in my room.

“So, about tomorrow night. Like I said earlier, Josh is spending the night with Jarrod and Mike and I’ll be out pretty late. Will you be okay here after you go shopping?”

“And what exactly are you going to be doing?”

I thought Josh was adorable when he was embarrassed and blushing, but Robert could give him a run for his money. “Umm, I sorta have a date.” The blush deepened however when Josh ran up to him and slammed into him, hugging him tight.

“OH MY FREAKING GOD DAD!!!!!!!!! This is the first date you’ve been on since the divorce. Who is it with? Do I know her? Is she nice? Where did y’all meet? Come on Dad. Tell me!!!!”

I laughed. I couldn’t help it. Through my laughter I managed to say, “Damn Robert. I guess Mel really was a bitch. She gave birth to a Chihuahua. Is he housebroken? I think he made a piddle.”

Robert couldn’t hold it in. He started laughing so hard he had to sit down. Josh tried to go for offended but it didn’t last. Soon, all three of us were literally rolling on the floor laughing our asses off. After about five minutes of on-again-off-again laughing fits, we finally calmed down.

Robert looked at Josh and then me. “Are y’all okay with this?”

Josh and I simply nodded and I spoke for the both of us. “Robert, if this is really the first date you’ve been on, then it’s about damn time. Go, have a good time, I’ll be fine. After therapy, I’ll go to the mall and then probably come home and order a pizza.”

*****

Friday was a lazy day until I had to get ready for my therapy session. My appointment was at 5:45, which means I didn’t get into his office till 6:00. An hour later, I was free for the rest of the night.

Since I now live in southeast Texas, right on the coast on the Texas-Louisiana border, I have gotten used to breathing water. There is almost 100% humidity daily. Needless to say, I was not the least bit surprised there was a torrential downpour. I considered just heading home, but I needed some new clothes, so I started towards the mall.

I hadn’t even driven three blocks from the office, when my tire blew out. I’ll admit it, I have no clue how to change a flat tire. Somehow, I managed to get the car over to the side of the road without hydroplaning. I stopped and turned on my hazard lights.

I thought to myself, Great it’s pouring rain, I have a flat tire, and no idea what to do. I couldn’t call Robert; I wasn’t about to interrupt him during his date. Josh wouldn’t be any help either; he has a driver’s license, but doesn’t have a car yet. Besides, he was spending the night at Jarrod’s with Mike. There went the entire list of people I knew. I decided to wait out the rain, these late summer showers never last very long around here.

It finally stopped raining about ten minutes later. Just as it let up I noticed a white pick-up truck pull up behind me. I exited my car to meet the driver. Out of the truck stepped a guy that looked about my age, slightly taller than me, with reddish brown hair, wearing a white wife-beater and cargo shorts. The guy was lean and muscular, and fucking gorgeous. As he approached, there was just enough light left to tell his eyes were emerald green. I thought I was going to drool on myself.

“Hey, do you need any help?” The guy had a deep southeast Texas accent (slightly Texan with a little bit of Cajun mixed in).

“Yeah, my tire blew out. And I was waiting for the rain to stop before getting out and try to change it.”

“Try? Have you ever changed a tire before?”

I looked at the ground sheepishly and reluctantly answered him. “Not really. I know what to do in theory. I was hoping someone would come by and help.”

He flashed a million-dollar smile at me. “I can help you out. I don’t have anywhere to be. It shouldn’t take long. I’m Sean. Can you pop the trunk for me?”

“Sure, I’m TJ by the way.”

“Nice to meet you, TJ. I don’t think I’ve seen you around here before. Where are you from?”

“I just moved here a couple of months ago from the Dallas area. I’m starting school Monday at PNG. I’ll be a senior.”

“Really? Same here. Except, I’ve lived here my entire life.”

As we talked, I popped the trunk while he waited at the back to get the jack and the spare tire. He suddenly was very quiet back there, and then it dawned on me. I still had one box in my trunk from when I moved down here. It was open, and it had all my porn and magazines in it. I never took it up to my room; I didn’t want Robert or Josh to accidentally find it. I was waiting till I found a good hiding spot. Eventually, I just forgot about it. When I reached the back of the car, he was removing the spare and jack. I noticed the box had been pushed farther back into the trunk. There was no way he moved it without seeing the magazine on top.

He stared at me. “TJ, I have some bad news. This spare is flat. The tire shop closed at 7:00pm. We’re either going to have leave your car here, or call a tow truck. I can give you a ride home if you need one.”

I was extremely nervous and started to stammer. “You’re still willing to help me out? Are you sure?”

He smiled again. “Yeah, I’m sure. I don’t mind at all. Maybe we can hang out for a while tonight. Unless you already have other plans, I mean. I don’t have anywhere to be till Monday morning.”

“No, I don’t have any plans either. I was just heading to the mall to pick up some clothes and shit, but I guess that it can wait till tomorrow. Besides, then I can bring my brother with me. I hate shopping by myself. Do you think my car will be okay here tonight? I don’t want to pay for a tow truck if I don’t have to.”

“It should be fine. You can leave a note on the dash letting the cops know that you’ll move it tomorrow. Just be sure to lock it up. I’ll go ahead and take off the flat tire and throw it in the bed of my truck.”

“Okay, let me leave a note and grab my backpack from the car. Thank you so much for helping me out, Sean. We can hang out at my place if you want. Nobody’s going to be there though, so if you have somewhere else to be, it’s cool. You can just drop me off.”

He looked at me with a sad, pained look. “Are you trying to get rid of me?”

I quickly replied to ease his pain. “No, of course not. I don’t know anybody around here except for my brother and couple of his friends. I could use some friends. I was just making sure you didn’t have somewhere else to be. I really would like to hang out for a while.”

His mouth turned into the biggest smile I’ve ever seen. “I would like that too. Let’s get this show on the road.”

He had the tire off the car in mere minutes, and miraculously pulled a cinder block from the bed of his truck to lower the car onto. Once the car was lowered onto the block, I left the note on the dash and grabbed my shit from the car while he put the jack and spare back in the trunk. By the time I made it to the back of my car, he had the trunk closed and was walking back to his truck. I was nervous as hell because I knew that there was absolutely no way he couldn’t have not seen what was in the box.

When I climbed into his truck, he could tell how nervous I was. “TJ, relax. I’m not going to bite.” Then he turned to the steering wheel and mumbled so low that I couldn’t quite make it out, but I swear he said, “Unless you want me to.”

My jaw must’ve been on the floor when he turned back to me. “If you’re not careful, something’s gonna fly in there. So, can you give me directions to your place?”

His smile, once again, set me at ease. “Sure, let’s go.”

Ten minutes later, we pulled up to the house. He turned to me with a questioning look. “Why are we at Mr. Kennedy’s?”

I winced a little. “That’s a long story. I’ll tell you, if you want to hear it.”

“Yeah, I’ll listen to your story. Let’s go inside. I’m starving. Have you eaten dinner yet? Maybe we can order some pizza and get to know each other some.”

“I was going to order a pizza anyways. Josh is spending the night at his friend’s and Robert is out for most of the night, so we’ll have the place to ourselves.”

We got out of the truck and started heading to the house. He stopped as we approached the front door. “TJ, I gotta be honest with you. I saw that box in your trunk.”

Great, here it comes. Now he’s going beat the shit out of me or back out and go home. I looked down at the ground and before he could continue any further, I interrupted him. “I understand. Thanks for the help. If you could just leave the tire by the garage, that would be cool.”

He came over to me and put his hand under my chin to raise my head. When I was looking him in the eyes, he spoke again. “Why are you trying to get rid of me again? I thought we were going to hang out and get to know each other.”

“Yeah, but you said you saw what was in the box, and I just figured…”

He laughed at the confusion on my face. “I was going to say, I saw that box in your trunk, and I think we have similar interests. I’m looking forward to getting to know you a little better.”

I was smiling so big, my face was starting to hurt. “Are you serious? Let’s go in and order that pizza. We can watch a movie or just hang out talk a little.”

“I would like to talk and get to you know more about you. Lead the way.”

We entered the house, ordered the pizza, and then sat on the love seat next to each other. He turned to me and asked me a question. “Do Mr. Kennedy and Josh know that you’re gay?”

“Yeah, I came out to everyone my freshman year. My parents were very supportive. Robert freaked out at first, but he came around by the time summer started. Josh actually ran away at beginning of that summer because his mom wasn’t going to let him visit me.”

“Isn’t that the summer she left?”

“Yup, Robert stood up to her finally, and she decided to show her true colors. She told Robert she wasn’t going to allow Josh to spend the summer with me because she didn’t want me to corrupt him. They got into a huge fight. Anyways, I don’t like talk about my ex-bitch-in-law.”

Sean smiled kindly and squeezed my hand for a moment. “We don’t have to talk about anything that you’re not comfortable with. I just want to get know you better, and tell you about myself.”

“Let’s wait till the pizza gets here, then we can start talking.”

“Okay. Sounds good to me. What time will Mr. Kennedy be back?”

“He’s out on a date, so no telling. But even if he comes home, he’ll be cool.”

“Is it weird being only one year older than your nephew?”
“Well, Josh is actually my brother.” The look on face was pure confusion. “Let’s wait for the pizza. That’s a major part of my story. Once I start telling it, please just let me finish. Then, if you have anything else you want to know, you can ask. Cool?”

Sean smiled warmly. “That sounds great. Can I ask you something now?”

“You just did.”

Sean rolled his eyes. “Seriously, smartass.”

“Okay, what would you like to ask?”

“Umm, can I kiss you?”

I didn’t bother answering him. I leaned over towards him, looked him straight in the eye, and placed my lips on his. The kiss started gently. Once Sean got over the shock of what I had done, he took control. He kissed me slowly and passionately. Neither of us were trying to control the kiss. We both gave and received what the other was giving. We didn’t pull away from each other until we heard the doorbell, signaling the arrival of the pizza. We were both breathless and I had to readjust myself before I answered the door.

We took the pizza to the kitchen, where I got us both Cokes and some paper plates. We loaded our plates and went to my room. We took a seat on my bed and started eating. After my second slice, I took a deep breath and started telling Sean everything. I started with my freshman year and Scott coming out to me and the beginning of our “relationship”, the death of my parents, the lawyer’s office, Mom’s letter, and all the bullshit drama with Scott. Oh, and the therapist, I told him that too.

When I finished my story, I looked at Sean. I wasn’t sure what to expect from him. There was a sad smile-not pity-just sad, on his face. He placed a soft kiss on my lips. “Wow, TJ. I’m sorry about all that. I noticed you still refer to Mr. Kennedy as your brother though.”

I nodded. “Yeah, he’ll always be my brother before anything else. Josh and I have always been more like brothers; he’s my best friend. Now, he’s actually my brother and I would do anything to protect him.”

He looked at the clock beside my bed, which read 9:50. “It’s getting pretty late, but I don’t want to end this conversation. Would you mind if I spent the night, so we can talk some more? Do you think Mr. Kennedy will mind?”

“That would be cool with me. Robert shouldn’t have a problem with it. But, you realize the assumption he’s going to make when he gets here and we’re sitting side-by-side in my bed talking, right? Are you out at all?”

“Last year, I decided to be honest with myself and finally admitted to myself that I was gay. I broke up with the girl I had been dating since our freshman year. I told her I valued the friendship more than anything. I think she might know the truth, since I never made any moves on her and in the end, I couldn’t even bring myself to do more than kiss her cheek and sometimes a peck on the lips. My dad was curious why I had broken up with her, so I told him the truth. He didn’t get upset or anything. He accepted it. We talked and decided that I probably shouldn’t come out at school, unless I had to since I play both football and baseball. I wouldn’t be upset if Mr. Kennedy knew, especially since I already know he’s cool with you. As far as school is concerned, if I was dating someone, I wouldn’t deny it. I would be open and honest and deal with the consequences.”

“Okay, do you need to call your parents and let them know you’re spending the night?”

“I’ll need to call my dad and let him know. He’ll be cool with it,” Sean said. He sounded sad; I wondered why?

He stood up, pulled out his cell and called his dad. While he was on the phone, I heard Robert come in the front door. “Teej, are you here?”

I walked out into the hall and ran into him. “Hey, yeah. Umm, I have a friend here. He’s going to spend the night if that’s cool.”

Robert regarded me for a moment. “Where’s your car? Isn’t that Sean McNair’s truck in the driveway?”

“Yeah, I got a flat on my way to the mall while it was raining. He pulled over to help me out. We started talking and when he went to check the spare, it was flat. He took the flat off, put my car on a cinder block, and then we came here, ordered pizza, and started getting to know each other.”

Just then, Sean came out of my room smiling. “Hello, Mr. Kennedy. How are you tonight?”

He extended his hand, which Robert shook. “Hey Sean. Thanks for helping TJ out. So, you’re spending the night?” The question was asked with slight apprehension.

“If that’s alright with you. We’re getting to know each other.”

Robert looked from Sean to me, then back at Sean, and raised his eyebrow. “Getting to know each other? Really? I hope everything is going well.”

Sean smiled at me and without looking at Robert spoke. “Yeah, it’s going great. Everything I’ve learned about TJ so far, I really like. My dad said it was okay if I stayed over.”

Robert chuckled. “I guess that’s fine with me. TJ, can I speak to you for a second? If you don’t mind Sean.”

Sean glanced back at Robert. “Oh, yeah that’s cool. I’ll just wait for you in your room TJ.”

Once Sean was in my room, Robert walked me down the hall towards his room. “Does he know?”

“Yes, Robert. Sean knows that I’m gay. He’s more than okay with it.”

Robert seemed skeptical. “Are you sure he’s okay with it? He is the captain of the football team, plays baseball, and he’s one of the most popular kids in the school. I’ve never seen him picking on anyone and never heard him talk bad about anyone, but…”

Just then Sean cleared his throat behind us. “I’m sorry to interrupt Mr. Kennedy. I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, but I think I should let you know something. I know TJ is gay and I’m more than alright with it, because, I am too. That’s why we’re getting to know each other.”

Robert looked at Sean, who surprisingly was not nervous. If anything, he looked confident.

Robert smiled. “I see. Well, I just wanted to make sure both of you were okay.”

He nodded his head. “I understand where you’re coming from. My dad probably would’ve done the same to me if we had been at my house instead. He says hi by the way.”

Robert got a sad look in his eyes. “How’s he holding up these days?”

Sean glanced at me, and then nodded. “He’s doing much better now, thanks for asking.”

I looked from one to the other. “Sean, why don’t we go back to my room so we can talk a little more. Is it okay if I close my door Robert? I don’t want to disrupt you since we’ll probably be up a few more hours.”

Robert sighed. “I guess that’s fine. No funny business.” Then he winked at us. “Or at least, what I don’t know won’t hurt me. Just keep it down, alright?”

Sean turned tomato red, and I started laughing. “Well, at least one of us might get lucky tonight. It’s barely past 10:00 and you’re already home?”

“Shut it, Teej. Besides, I don’t kiss and tell. But I will let you know I have another date tomorrow night.” He turned and headed to his room. As the door closed we heard him. “Goodnight guys. I’ll see y’all in the morning. Don’t be up all night.”

Once we were back in the safety of my room, Sean stared at me with his mouth gaping. “I cannot believe you just said that to Mr. Kennedy. He’s our assistant principal. Dude. Fucking A. How could you say that?”

I suppressed my laughter and I drew him into a hug. “Sean, it’s okay. I swear. He’s been my big brother my entire life. His name is Robert. If you’re going to be around more, while you’re here don’t think of him as Mr. Kennedy assistant principal.”

I stared into his eyes for a few moments. “I’ve only heard you talk about your dad so far. What happened to your mom?”

His eyes filled with tears. “She died from cancer when I was twelve, so I know what it’s like to lose a parent.” He unashamedly allowed the tears to fall.

My tears soon followed. I guided him over to the bed and sat down with my back against the headboard, and then I pulled him down so he was sitting between my legs. I held him tightly against my chest. “Shh, I’m sorry.” That’s all I said to him.

We sat in silence for about ten minutes, and then Sean spoke quietly. “I’m an only child. My parents tried to have other kids, but my mom couldn’t have any more. She always called me her ‘little miracle’. She told me every day how special and how loved I was. My dad did the exact same thing. I tried to do everything to make them happy. When I started playing peewee football, I hated it. But I saw how happy it made my mom and dad, so I kept playing. It was the same when I started playing tee-ball. Now, I can’t imagine my life without football and baseball.

“She started getting sick around the beginning of the school year. By the time they found out what was wrong, it was too late. By Thanksgiving of that year, she was in the hospital. She held out through Christmas. The last thing she told me was to be happy.”

We were still sitting on my bed, with me holding him from behind. I whispered in his ear. “I really don’t want to move, but I need to get ready for bed. I have some basketball shorts that should fit you. Do you want to take a shower first?”

“Yeah, that would be nice. So, umm, where am I going to sleep?”

“I would like you to sleep right here next to me. But, I’m telling you right now, nothing is going to happen, except sleep. I want something more than what I had with Scott.”

“I’m good with us taking our time. Now, let’s get ready for bed.”

About twenty minutes later, we were both showered and laying in my bed, under the covers. We fell asleep with my back against his chest, his arms wrapped around me. He kissed the back of my head just before I was fully asleep and whispered in my ear. “I’m really glad I met you TJ. I could get used to this.”

“Me too, Sean.”

Everything was perfect. I should’ve known the shit was about to hit the fan.

It happened the next morning when Josh barged into my room and started speaking before the door was fully open. “I did it Teej! I told them, and they were cool with…Oh!” The smile faded from his face.

That’s when I heard the words that broke my heart.

“Hey there, Little Buddy. How are you?”